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The Costco Essay Deconstructed

Article updated on November 15, 2019

Students searching for exemplary examples of college admissions essays may already be familiar with what has come to be known as The Costco Essay , but it is worth digging a little deeper to understand how this essay that “ got a high school senior in to 5 Ivy League colleges ” actually works.

Many people have noted that the essay alone did not get the student admitted to all these schools, rather it was the totality of her application. This is of course true! We have ourselves written extensively about the 11 distinct criteria colleges use to evaluate applicants, but the fact remains that when so many students have great grades and test scores, your college essays are clearly an important opportunity to stand out.

I caution all my students not to read an excessive amount of examples, because it can become overwhelming to compare too many glowing finished essays to one’s own blank page or early draft in progress.  But if you read in the right spirit, I believe a few examples can be both instructive and inspiring. I have tried to explain some of what I find compelling about the Costco Essay.

Prompt 1: Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

Now more than ever, colleges are affirming the weight given to a student’s character as it comes through across all elements of an application. So have no illusions that grades and test scores make one applicant more qualified or deserving of admission to college than another. We are not looking at the whole application, but in addition to being well written, this essay demonstrates of the kind of character that Ivy League and all colleges want on their campus.

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Essay About Love for Costco Wins Student Admission to Five Ivies

A college essay about one teen's drive to explore life — as well as her deep and abiding love for Costco — has won over admissions counselors at six of the most prestigious schools in the U.S.

Brittany Stinson, an 18-year-old senior at Concord High School in Wilmington, Delaware, found out last week that she got into five Ivy League universities — Yale, Columbia, University of Pennsylvania, Dartmouth, and Cornell — as well as the similarly competitive Stanford.

Stinson, the only child of Terry and Joe Stinson, neither of whom are Ivy League nor Stanford graduates themselves, wants to be a doctor, and her mother says she has always been a strong student.

Special section: Get tips and advice about college at College Game Plan

“She’s always gotten straight As, takes the most rigorous courses she can, and is first in her class,” Terry Stinson, a Brazilian immigrant who became an American citizen only a few years ago, told NBC News.

Aside from her academics, Stinson's unusual essay made her college application stand out.

In response to the essay question, which asks students to share a "background, identity, interest or talent that is so meaningful," their application would be incomplete without it, Stinson described her admiration for America's largest wholesale warehouse — and how "the kingdom of Costco" was symbolic of so much more in her life.

“Just as I sampled buffalo ­chicken dip or chocolate truffles, I probed the realms of history, dance and biology, all in pursuit of the ideal cart–one overflowing with theoretical situations and notions both silly and serious,” she wrote. “I sampled calculus, cross-­country running, scientific research, all of which are now household favorites. With cart in hand, I do what scares me; I absorb the warehouse that is the world.”

Writing about Costco felt natural to her, she told NBC News.

“I had always gone to Costco while growing up. It was a constant part of my childhood. I Iooked forward to trips on the weekends, and I had always treated it as a Disneyland of sorts. I was always curious about the place. The same attitude carried over to everything I tried in life,” she said.

While it was risky to write about something so outlandish, Stinson felt like she needed something to stand out amid other applicants with similar grades, extracurriculars, and SAT scores.

“I couldn’t afford to go via the traditional route. I would actually be more worried about taking a traditional route at the risk of blending in with other applicants,” Stinson said. “I knew that writing about my experiences at Costco would at least make for a memorable essay, whether [admissions committees] loved or hated it. On another hand, I felt that the essay ended up being such an accurate representation of me and my personality.”

Related: After Bouncing Between Foster Homes, Golf Caddie Gets Full Ride to College

Stinson’s father, Joe, said he believes his daughter’s greatest strengths are “her fortitude and tenacity, to choose among many.” Her English teacher for the past two years, Leslie Wagner of Concord High School, says writing is one of those strengths too.

“Brittany has always had a knack for finding just the right phrase. She has a quiet demeanor overall, but in her writing her wit and her skill with language is quite apparent,” Wagner told NBC News.

Now, Stinson has a tough choice ahead of her. She said she has “no clue” which of the universities that admitted her she will choose.

“Admitted student day visits are going to be so vital. We’ll also be comparing financial aid packages,” she said.

Read Brittany Stinson's full essay below, reprinted with her permission:

Managing to break free from my mother’s grasp, I charged. With arms flailing and chubby legs fluttering beneath me, I was the ferocious two­ year old rampaging through Costco on a Saturday morning. My mother’s eyes widened in horror as I jettisoned my churro; the cinnamon­-sugar rocket gracefully sliced its way through the air while I continued my spree. I sprinted through the aisles, looking up in awe at the massive bulk products that towered over me. Overcome with wonder, I wanted to touch and taste, to stick my head into industrial­sized freezers, to explore every crevice. I was a conquistador, but rather than searching the land for El Dorado, I scoured aisles for free samples. Before inevitably being whisked away into a shopping cart, I scaled a mountain of plush toys and surveyed the expanse that lay before me: the kingdom of Costco.

Notorious for its oversized portions and dollar-­fifty hot dog combo, Costco is the apex of consumerism. From the days spent being toted around in a shopping cart to when I was finally tall enough to reach lofty sample trays, Costco has endured a steady presence throughout my life. As a veteran Costco shopper, I navigate the aisles of foodstuffs, thrusting the majority of my weight upon a generously filled shopping cart whose enormity juxtaposes my small frame. Over time, I’ve developed a habit of observing fellow patrons tote their carts piled with frozen burritos, cheese puffs, tubs of ice cream, and weight-­loss supplements. Perusing the aisles gave me time to ponder. Who needs three pounds of sour cream? Was cultured yogurt any more well­-mannered than its uncultured counterpart? Costco gave birth to my unfettered curiosity.

While enjoying an obligatory hot dog, I did not find myself thinking about the ‘all beef’ goodness that Costco boasted. I instead considered finitudes and infinitudes, unimagined uses for tubs of sour cream, the projectile motion of said tub when launched from an eighty foot shelf or maybe when pushed from a speedy cart by a scrawny seventeen year old. I contemplated the philosophical: If there exists a thirty-­three ounce jar of Nutella, do we really have free will? I experienced a harsh physics lesson while observing a shopper who had no evident familiarity of inertia's workings. With a cart filled to overflowing, she made her way towards the sloped exit, continuing to push and push while steadily losing control until the cart escaped her and went crashing into a concrete column, 52” plasma screen TV and all. Purchasing the yuletide hickory smoked ham inevitably led to a conversation between my father and me about Andrew Jackson’s controversiality. There was no questioning Old Hickory’s dedication; he was steadfast in his beliefs and pursuits – qualities I am compelled to admire, yet his morals were crooked. We both found the ham to be more likeable–and tender.

I adopted my exploratory skills, fine tuned by Costco, towards my intellectual endeavors. Just as I sampled buffalo­-chicken dip or chocolate truffles, I probed the realms of history, dance and biology, all in pursuit of the ideal cart–one overflowing with theoretical situations and notions both silly and serious. I sampled calculus, cross­-country running, scientific research, all of which are now household favorites. With cart in hand, I do what scares me; I absorb the warehouse that is the world. Whether it be through attempting aerial yoga, learning how to chart blackbody radiation using astronomical software, or dancing in front of hundreds of people, I am compelled to try any activity that interests me in the slightest.

My intense desire to know, to explore beyond the bounds of rational thought; this is what defines me. Costco fuels my insatiability and cultivates curiosity within me at a cellular level. Encoded to immerse myself in the unknown, I find it difficult to complacently accept the “what”; I want to hunt for the “whys” and dissect the “hows”. In essence, I subsist on discovery.

Why The Costco Essay Is Crucial Reading for Future College Applicants (And Also Why It's Not)

Founder and Chief Advisor at College Essay Advisors and Creator of College Essay Academy

By now you have probably heard about or read the college essay by high schooler Brittany Stinson detailing how her routine trips to Costco shaped her life and world. In the piece, now officially at viral status , Stinson paints a vivid picture of how wandering up and down the aisles at her favorite big box store inspired her to ponder the addictive nature of Nutella, imagine physics experiments involving 3-pound tubs of sour cream and converse with her father about historical figures who share their aliases with giant hams . The essay is clever, warm and highly observant and introspective. If Costco is a kingdom, as Brittany claims, she is currently its reigning Queen.

Every year around acceptance time college essays of successful applicants are published (and then shared and reshared) for both the admiration and dissection of students, parents, journalists and admissions experts. Publications like USA Today , Refinery29 and even People latched onto this year's acceptance story, most of them acknowledging Stinson's writing prowess, and many focusing even more on the accomplishments purportedly made possible by such a stellar submission .

The Business Insider piece that originally introduced Stinson's essay to the world framed her success in their title: "This Essay Got a High School Senior Into 5 Ivy League Schools and Stanford." As a college essay expert and advisor, I would love to be able to tell you that a college essay can get you into the school of your dreams. But the truth is, a wide array of factors are considered in admissions decisions and the essay is just one of them. And media attention that focuses exclusively on students who gain admission to multiple Ivy League Institutions sends the wrong message to students (and parents) about what is important and why they should pay attention to Stinson's writing.

Stinson's essay was not her ticket to admission. It was a thoughtfully crafted, brilliantly executed piece of a very complex puzzle. Still, the college essay is a highly significant piece of the puzzle in that it is one of the only opportunities students have to speak to admissions officers in their own voices and highlight something about their personalities or passions that allows them to stand our from other, similarly qualified candidates.

So what should students and parents take away from the Costco essay? Here are a few things Stinson did right that you want to try and emulate in your own essay:

Be specific . The lively scene Stinson paints is so compelling because of the incredible number of details she includes about her Costco experience. She contemplates other patrons' selections, describing "carts piled with frozen burritos, cheese puffs, tubs of ice cream, and weight ¬loss supplements." She recounts the tale of a shopper "losing control until the cart escaped her and went crashing into a concrete column, 52" plasma screen TV and all." Even the opening portrait of Stinson as a two year-old losing her churro (it "gracefully sliced its way through the air while I continued my spree") in her race to explore the aisles piques the reader's interest and establishes Stinson as an energized explorer of an exciting world we might have once viewed as mundane. The inclusion of these observations also substantiates the claims the writer ultimately makes about herself. They're the key component of the "show, don't tell" approach and are much more powerful, concrete demonstrations of her character than a sentence that simply says, "I have always been curious." Connect your topic to your larger personality qualities and characteristics. This essay about Costco is not really about Costco. It is about Stinson's intellectual curiosity, her untamable imagination and her ability to link these qualities back to one place in her life where those qualities revealed themselves. She writes:

"Just as I sampled buffalo¬ chicken dip or chocolate truffles, I probed the realms of history, dance and biology, all in pursuit of the ideal cart-one overflowing with theoretical situations and notions both silly and serious. I sampled calculus, cross¬ country running, scientific research, all of which are now household favorites."

Stinson's desire to taste all life had to offer is clearly not relegated to formerly-frozen food served up in tiny Solo cups.

Lean into your voice. Just like a seventeen year-old leans into a fully-stacked Costco shopping cart. By the time admissions reads your essay they know many things about you, but they don't know what it would be like to sit in a room and have a conversation with you. Reading Stinson's essay, you get a sense of her lightness and humor. She isn't stiff or fake. She seems both genuine and genuinely like a person you want to be around. This is accomplished by trusting your instincts and writing in a way that feels natural to you. Maybe the following lines, amusing as they are, do not sound like things you would say or write: "Perusing the aisles gave me time to ponder. Who needs three pounds of sour cream? Was cultured yogurt any more well ¬mannered than its uncultured counterpart?"

Fret not and trust yourself. You will find the words that sound like you.

Notice how none of this advice suggests you "write in metaphors" or "search for weird topics." For all the good that can come out of combing through Stinson's carefully crafted words, there is a danger in leaning too heavily on essay examples of former applicants.

Students can be easily spooked by stellar admissions essays, especially when these applicants are in the vulnerable position of trying to get their own personal perspectives out of their subconscious and onto the page. It can be discouraging to compare your earliest ideas and drafts to final, edited masterpieces. "What if I'm boring?" they tend to ask themselves. "What if I can't figure out how to write about why I am just like a toaster oven or how my trips to Costco changed my life and worldview?"

This is why it is crucial to internalize that this Costco essay represents just one example of an approach that might work in a winning admissions essay. It worked for Stinson because this style allowed her to honestly and creatively represent her passions, thought processes, quick wit and blooming imagination. Put the strategies in your shopping cart and keep moving down the aisles. After a lot of brainstorming, some careful contemplation, and maybe even a Costco ice cream cone or two (to fuel brainpower, obviously), you'll know when you've found the right combination of topic, voice and style, be they oversized or a bit more subdued. Then it's time to hit the checkout counter and bring it all home.

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ICYMI- Why The Costco College Essay Is Crucial Reading for Future College Applicants

At this point, it’s almost been impossible to avoid reading about the amazing Costco college essay that secured one lucky applicant admission to several Ivies and Stanford. It’s a great essay, but not everyone seems to understand why, so CEA Founder Stacey Brook broke it down and offered some lessons that everyone can take away from this well-executed piece of prose:

By now you have probably heard about or read the college essay by high schooler Brittany Stinson detailing how her routine trips to Costco shaped her life and world. In the piece, now officially at viral status , Stinson paints a vivid picture of how wandering up and down the aisles at her favorite big box store inspired her to ponder the addictive nature of Nutella, imagine physics experiments involving 3-pound tubs of sour cream and converse with her father about historical figures who share their aliases with giant hams . The essay is clever, warm and highly observant and introspective. If Costco is a kingdom, as Brittany claims, she is currently its reigning Queen. […]

The Business Insider piece that originally introduced Stinson’s essay to the world framed her success in their title: “This Essay Got a High School Senior Into 5 Ivy League Schools and Stanford.” As a college essay expert and advisor, I would love to be able to tell you that a college essay can get you into the school of your dreams. But the truth is, a wide array of factors are considered in admissions decisions and the essay is just one of them. And media attention that focuses exclusively on students who gain admission to multiple Ivy League Institutions sends the wrong message to students (and parents) about what is important and why they should pay attention to Stinson’s writing.

Stinson’s essay was not her ticket to admission. It was a thoughtfully crafted, brilliantly executed piece of a very complex puzzle. Still, the college essay is a highly significant piece of the puzzle in that it is one of the only opportunities students have to speak to admissions officers in their own voices and highlight something about their personalities or passions that allows them to stand our from other, similarly qualified candidates.

So what should students and parents take away from the Costco essay?

Read the rest at Huffington Post .

About Thea Hogarth

View all posts by Thea Hogarth »

Written by Thea Hogarth

Category: College Admissions , Essay Tips

Tags: advice , college acceptance , college applications , college essay , costco , huffington post , tips

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The girl who got into 5 Ivies and Stanford with a unique essay about Costco finally made her choice

Brittany Stinson, the high-school senior whose unique  essay on Costco secured her admission into five Ivy League schools and Stanford, has finally made her decision.

"I'm going to Stanford!" she told Business Insider.

Stinson, whose Ivy acceptances were to  Yale, Columbia, the University of Pennsylvania, Dartmouth, and Cornell,  said her decision ultimately came down to where she felt the best fit, since all of the schools are academic powerhouses.

"All those schools have equal academic prowess, so it honestly came down to fit and location," she said.

Related stories

For Stinson, the appeal of the West Coast, as well as Stanford's stellar science programs led her to decide on The Cardinal.

While Stinson plans to major in neuroscience, she was also impressed by Stanford's range of course offerings.

"It has strength in science and also the humanities," she said. "They have a lot of interdisciplinary classes and majors, so that really appealed to me too."

For her admission's essay, Stinson crafted a lighthearted reflection of her inquisitive personality, told against a backdrop of her childhood trips to Costco. The essay went viral after she shared with with Business Insider. Read her essay here »

Stinson, who is also valedictorian of her Concord High School class, is grateful some of the interest in her essay has begun to recede.

"When it reached its peak — oh my goodness — it was kind of overwhelming," she said. "I'm glad it's died down." 

Watch: How a Wall Street chief strategist's Costco shopping experience explains the biggest misconception about global trade

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Read the College Essay About Costco That Got This Senior Into 5 Ivy League Schools

From Cosmopolitan

Meet Brittany Stinson, an 18-year-old senior at Concord High School in Wilmington, Delaware, who just last week found out she got into Yale, Columbia, University of Pennsylvania, Dartmouth, Cornell, Columbia, and Stanford. What is so special about Stinson, you might ask? Besides the fact she's undoubtedly an excellent student, she wrote her college essay on Costco. Yes, Costco.

"I'm sort of still in shock. I don't think I've processed everything yet," she told Business Insider , with whom she shared the entire essay.

The Common Application prompt was: "Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story." Stinson felt her background as a "Costco veteran" was meaningful enough to share and she was right.

Her essay begins:

Managing to break free from my mother's grasp, I charged. With arms flailing and chubby legs fluttering beneath me, I was the ferocious two­ year old rampaging through Costco on a Saturday morning. My mother's eyes widened in horror as I jettisoned my churro; the cinnamon ­sugar rocket gracefully sliced its way through the air while I continued my spree. I sprinted through the aisles, looking up in awe at the massive bulk products that towered over me. Overcome with wonder, I wanted to touch and taste, to stick my head into industrial­-sized freezers, to explore every crevice. I was a conquistador, but rather than searching the land for El Dorado, I scoured aisles for free samples. Before inevitably being whisked away into a shopping cart, I scaled a mountain of plush toys and surveyed the expanse that lay before me: the kingdom of Costco. Notorious for its oversized portions and dollar-­fifty hot dog combo, Costco is the apex of consumerism. From the days spent being toted around in a shopping cart to when I was finally tall enough to reach lofty sample trays, Costco has endured a steady presence throughout my life. As a veteran Costco shopper, I navigate the aisles of foodstuffs, thrusting the majority of my weight upon a generously filled shopping cart whose enormity juxtaposes my small frame. Over time, I've developed a habit of observing fellow patrons tote their carts piled with frozen burritos, cheese puffs, tubs of ice cream, and weight-­loss supplements. Perusing the aisles gave me time to ponder. Who needs three pounds of sour cream? Was cultured yogurt any more well­-mannered than its uncultured counterpart? Costco gave birth to my unfettered curiosity.

It takes a brilliant creature to elevate stuffing your face with free samples to a metaphor about having an appetite for life and approaching obstacles with curiosity instead of fear, but that's exactly what she did. You can read her essay in full over on Business Insider ... and spend the rest of the day thinking about what you plan to accomplish with the rest of your life.

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Costco Essay: Analysis And How to Write a Better One

Writing Costco Essay

Costco is one of the largest retail stores that focus on lower prices for consumers. The company boasts of numerous warehouses that have more than 4000 different varieties of goods.

Through proper leadership strategies, Costco has been able to offer consumers high-quality prices at lower prices compared to its competitor stores.

They embrace a self-administration model of operation for customers thus reducing the need of employing workers. 

People Also Read: Is a person a primary or Secondary Source of Research?

What is Costco Essay?

The famous Costco essay is a college admission essay that was written by Brittany Stinson, a former student of Concord high school.

As a requirement for high school students to write an admission essay before joining a college, Brittany chose the topic because of her love for Costco wholesale and retail stores. 

Shockingly, the essay got the internet and colleges cheering.

It received a high rating gaining her admission to top Ivy League learning institutions such as Cornell, Yale, Stanford, Columbia, and the University of Pennsylvania. 

Students who have gone through high school will all concur that the transition period between high school and college is challenging. It is a time when they experience a lot of emptiness because of the anxiety of going to a new learning environment.

To make it worse, gaining admission to the top schools is difficult if you do not come up with a good application essay. 

Even an outstanding performance in GPA and SAT is not enough to gain admission to a good college such as Stanford. Learning institutions provide a prompt for students to write an admission essay or personal statement to get a place in their classes.

Also known as Brittany Stinson’s essay, the Costco essay has been one of the most remarkable because of what it achieved. 

Analysis on What Makes The Costco Essay Good

The author did not write an ordinary essay about the topic. Instead, she made a summary of all her experience with the Costco stores. This was in response to the admission application prompt in 2016. 

After reading the prompt of the essay, the author made huge efforts to write the essay to the best of her knowledge while observing her personal experience of the stores.

Her writing was a pure demonstration of imagination, profound thinking, and outstanding organizational skills.

The coherence of ideas and personal experience in the essay was simply impeccable.

There was an in-depth and precise description of the author’s experience at the stores.

As such, the audience reading the personal statement found it easy to feel the explanation of her writer’s personality.

To give the reader more connection to the experiences, Brittany gives a deep exploration of the relationship she had with this wholesale retail store. 

All the moments are captured so that even the person who does not know the store can completely understand the events. Smartly, Brittany related the experience to her childhood and teenage age. The moments spent at the store were well correlated to her personal qualities as well as the studies.

The wisdom of the writer and the ability to relate all the details and experiences ranked the essay high. Getting recognition by the Ivy League learning institutions is not easy. This league of colleges has a low acceptance rate.

Many successful high school graduates fail to get admission even after scoring high in their GPA. 

People Also Read: Is an Essay a Research Paper: The Differences from Each

How to Write a Similarly Good Costco Essay

Without a doubt, Brittany Stinson’s essay provides a good avenue for students to learn vital aspects of a successful college admission essay.

It teaches how to write great statements of purpose, admission essays, and personal statements that can secure admission to top institutions of higher learning. Below is what you can learn from this remarkable piece of essay:

1. Always choose an Outstanding Topic

If you are a keen reader, the topic is one of the most admirable features of the Costco essay. The theme was a clear reflection of the topic.

As such, always go for an outstanding topic even when you have been given the essay prompt. You only have to use the prompt given as a pillar for brainstorming good topic ideas . 

In the essay, it is clear that writing about yourself or everyday experience should never be an end in itself.

To entice the admission committee, strive to have creativity as you balance the theme with the topic. Let the topic stand out by making it not only striking but also precise and hilarious.

2. Research and think Deep

If you dig deep into the Costco essay, you will concur it is precisely written. There is no exaggeration whatsoever in the essay’s ability to win the hearts of the admission committee. Brittany showcases nothing but deep thinking, reasoning, and great research abilities. 

Even though her focus is on how her family had a shopping experience at Costco, she made it more appealing to the reader. The author gave a study of her personal experiences and the effect on her personality growth.

Brittany went against her mother’s wish to explore the sales of the store, goods, and free samples. In simple words, there is a pure reflection of the author’s passion which is a good ingredient in writing a catchy admission essay.

3. Go with a Realizable Theme

Admission essays share a lot of similarities with book reviews and poems. They both need an underlying theme to make them more informative. The Costco essay uses the theme of passion and boldness to show the commitment of the author.

Coupled with a good grasp of English and proper use of vocabulary, the essay achieved the ultimate goal of pleasing the admission. Writers need to select good vocabularies that are in line with the context of the essay.

4. Good tone

If you want to write a good admission essay, set your tone from the start. Know how to balance the tones so that you kill boredom and monotony. Know how to use formal and informal writing in your essay.

In the case of the Costco essay, Brittany’s theme was formal. Nevertheless, she also managed to squeeze in humor that does not affect the seriousness of the message. 

People Also Read: How to Censor Words in an Essay: Bad Words in Academic Papers

Costco Essay Example Topics to Write on

• The good and bad sides of Costco Company
• A favorite meal you always want to cook and share with family
• The food retailing industry in America
• A complete analysis of Costco’s retailing strategy
• Retailing and wholesaling lessons from the success of Costco 

With over 10 years in academia and academic assistance, Alicia Smart is the epitome of excellence in the writing industry. She is our chief editor and in charge of the writing department at Grade Bees.

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Ok Fine. I’ll Write About the Awe-inspiring Costco Essay

• by Mattie Culkin

First thoughts:  It’s aight. I see why she got in places. My biggest negative towards the whole thing was actually how  calculated  and  polished the piece was. Yes, it’s a wacky Costco essay. But to a trained eye, it’s the work of a professional writer expertly crafting a work that will make a student come off well. One of the greatest magic tricks we as consultants play is making it seem like we were never there at all. The much rougher version of this type of essay is the essay I can tell a parent wrote. Those tend to be calculated as hell but never polished and usually really bad. This is a much higher level of touch-up.

Or maybe it wasn’t! I don’t know; perhaps she’s just both extraordinarily talented and knows how to professionally craft college work. And hey, she got in. Maybe I should take this as a bit of advice for myself.

Because of that, I’m less interested in giving this piece a grade (8.5. Needs more believable substance in the middle. See notes.) and more diving into what kind of thought process went into making the piece in the first place. I also start doing that editor thing halfway through where I say an essay is good only to then tear it to shreds line by line. Sorry. The doctor says it’s incurable.

Take this as an analysis of what I think goes into a top-tier college essay. As well as the type of feedback and advice I tend to give when doing my editing. Spoiler: It’s a lot more about strategy than talent.

https://www.businessinsider.com/high-school-senior-who-got-into-5-ivy-league-schools-shares-her-admissions-essay-2016-4

Prompt 1: Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

Managing to break free from my mother’s grasp, I charged. With arms flailing and chubby legs fluttering beneath me, I was the ferocious two year old rampaging through Costco on a Saturday morning.

This, students, is what we call a “hook.” A hook is a way of starting a piece of writing by presenting ongoing events immediately, live, as if the reader were an onlooker in the store themselves. The goal is to create intrigue and excitement by jumping right into the action before explaining the context. In a more general sense, the concept being used here is “en media res.”

I tend not to like hooks because everyone does hooks. College essays aren’t a zero-sum game, and it’s essential to realize that your essay will be read alongside hundreds of others. By using “best practices” to a tee, you end up with a problem that your “excellent” writing is excellent in the same way as everyone else’s. Gotta be two steps ahead, ya know?

I also don’t like hooks because they’re hard and I’m bad at them. I’m bad at intros in general. I will say that for a hook, this one is good. You want your reader to be intrigued by your info: not confused. There’s not too much going on here before the story opens up. Girl is excited about something. Oh, hey, I like Costco, too.

My mother’s eyes widened in horror as I jettisoned my churro; the cinnamon-sugar rocket gracefully sliced its way through the air while I continued my spree. I sprinted through the aisles, looking up in awe at the massive bulk products that towered over me. Overcome with wonder, I wanted to touch and taste, to stick my head into industrial-sized freezers, to explore every crevice. I was a conquistador, but rather than searching the land for El Dorado, I scoured aisles for free samples. Before inevitably being whisked away into a shopping cart, I scaled a mountain of plush toys and surveyed the expanse that lay before me: the kingdom of Costco.

OK, shoutout to this girl. I’d pretty much been coming to this conclusion on my own, but this is an excellent paragraph to explain what “show don’t tell means.” Reread this paragraph, but this time, focus less on the content and more on  what you learn about the author through what she writes.  Make a list. Here’s mine:

– She’s high-energy and a bit impulsive

– She emphasizes tangible experiences. She wants to see, taste, smell everything life has to offer

– She has an eye for gravitas and seeks wonder in everything she does

– She’s imaginative and likes to fancy her situation as more important than it probably is

– She can be extra

Even if you’re not trying to psychoanalyze her, anyone reading this paragraph will get a sense of this girl’s personality. Excitable and adventurous. Because this is well written, it doesn’t feel forced.

The “tell” version of this paragraph would be like, “I’ve always seen places I’ve gone to as fairytale lands to explore. When I’m in Cosco, I’m the queen of the market, and every overstocked shelf is my liege.”

I did the thing again, where I wrote an example trying to make it sound bad, only for it also to be fine. This is why I don’t think telling is necessarily that bad. But she did show, and she did it well.

Notorious for its oversized portions and dollarfifty hot dog combo, Costco is the apex of consumerism. From the days spent being toted around in a shopping cart to when I was finally tall enough to reach lofty sample trays, Costco has endured a steady presence throughout my life. As a veteran Costco shopper, I navigate the aisles of foodstuffs, thrusting the majority of my weight upon a generously filled shopping cart whose enormity juxtaposes my small frame.

I wouldn’t have kept the “apex of consumerism” line. Like, it is. But that’s not what this Costco essay is about. That implies her favorite thing about Costco is supporting free-market capitalism.

I think I would have cut this entire paragraph. It doesn’t add much, and I think we as readers already know what Costco is and why someone might like it. It’s not bad on its own, but there’s space lower where I’d like something more tangible, and cutting this would have saved 77 words for later.

Over time, I’ve developed a habit of observing fellow patrons tote their carts piled with frozen burritos, cheese puffs, tubs of ice cream, and weightloss supplements. Perusing the aisles gave me time to ponder. Who needs three pounds of sour cream? Was cultured yogurt any more well mannered than its uncultured counterpart? Costco gave birth to my unfettered curiosity.

This is a fun college admissions essay. Unfettered curiosity is probably my favorite line in this Costco essay. I will be stealing that.

While enjoying an obligatory hot dog, I did not find myself thinking about the ‘all beef’ goodness that Costco boasted. I instead considered finitudes and infinitudes, unimagined uses for tubs of sour cream, the projectile motion of said tub when launched from an eighty foot shelf or maybe when pushed from a speedy cart by a scrawny seventeen year old.

I don’t like “Finitudes and infinitudes.” Finitudes and infinitudes of what? She goes on to address individual ones, but the clause as a whole means absolutely nothing without context. I would probably want something as verbose. “Finitudes and infinitudes of the wholesale galaxy but a foodcourt away.” I’ll write someday about using big-kid writer words and phrasing. I’m not the guy to tell you to put down the thesaurus. But I will tell you only to use words that make sense and enhance the sentence. When you use big words just to use them, they tend to come off as forced or inauthentic. I discourage forced or inauthentic writing.

This is probably the right place to ask a question I have with the piece: is she ironic? My answer is “no.” But maybe? I would want to ask her and get a straight answer. Then we lean harder into one direction or the other. This essay reads like 80% legit power fantasy and 20% “lol Costco am I right?” I feel like the former is the right angle and why this piece popped as it did instead of falling into “le quirky teen” camp. But I would have wanted to make it 100% sincere.

I contemplated the philosophical: If there exists a thirtythree ounce jar of Nutella, do we really have free will? I experienced a harsh physics lesson while observing a shopper who had no evident familiarity of inertia’s workings. With a cart filled to overflowing, she made her way towards the sloped exit, continuing to push and push while steadily losing control until the cart escaped her and went crashing into a concrete column, 52″ plasma screen TV and all. Purchasing the yuletide hickory smoked ham inevitably led to a conversation between my father and me about Andrew Jackson’s controversiality. There was no questioning Old Hickory’s dedication; he was steadfast in his beliefs and pursuits – qualities I am compelled to admire, yet his morals were crooked. We both found the ham to be more likeable-and tender.

I would have shortened the part about the lady crashing into one sentence. Too much content, not about her. I might have her change it entirely to a third story just about her. I think there’s a clash where it goes story about her/nutella, a different person wiping out, her/father/ham. In trios like this, it helps to theme them, so the reader doesn’t have to reorient their understanding for each story.

I get to this more in my final notes, but this paragraph ain’t it. One hundred thirty-four words, and I just don’t like it that much.

I adopted my exploratory skills, fine tuned by Costco, towards my intellectual endeavors. Just as I sampled buffalochicken dip or chocolate truffles, I probed the realms of history, dance and biology, all in pursuit of the ideal cart-one overflowing with theoretical situations and notions both silly and serious. I sampled calculus, crosscountry running, scientific research, all of which are now household favorites.

With cart in hand, I do what scares me; I absorb the warehouse that is the world. Whether it be through attempting aerial yoga, learning how to chart blackbody radiation using astronomical software, or dancing in front of hundreds of people, I am compelled to try any activity that interests me in the slightest.

This section is what I like to call the “getting my shit in” paragraph. I laughed because I’ve done paragraphs precisely like it in essays precisely like this one. And those paragraphs always fall in this exact spot: right before the big dramatic ending.

There are two types of common apps essay:

• A cool thing you did
• What makes you tick

I’m sure you’ll be able to find me ones that are out of those realms, but I’ve done a lot of these, and those are the two themes that get hit 95% of the time. More and more, “what makes you tick” seems to make for a more powerful essay.  That’s what those third UC essays I wrote about last time tended to focus on.

The problem with those types of essays is it’s hard to then also get your shit in. College essays serve a lot of masters, and one of those is making sure the reader knows you’ve worked your ass off and have a damn good reason to have done so. The quick fix is this exact paragraph:

“Yes, I love Costco. JUST AS I LOVE YOGA AND DEVELOPING SOFTWARE IN MY SPARE TIME.”

I think I’m inching closer and closer to just dropping this paragraph from my student’s works. Seeing someone else do the same thing makes me realize how forced it feels. But I also want them to get their shit in…

My intense desire to know, to explore beyond the bounds of rational thought; this is what defines me. Costco fuels my insatiability and cultivates curiosity within me at a cellular level. Encoded to immerse myself in the unknown, I find it difficult to complacently accept the “what”; I want to hunt for the “whys” and dissect the “hows”. In essence, I subsist on discovery.

Do you know what my actual takeaway is after reading through this whole thing again? This essay didn’t need to be about Costco. There is another, near-identical essay in which this girl is at an amusement park, or playground, or ice cream shop, or anywhere else with lots of exciting things that you can interact with. Finding wonderment in the only somewhat-extraordinary is a thematic device that extends well past a particular big-box store.

It could also be set at a Walmart or Sams Club. But she went with Costco. And that’s why it worked, and she became a meme. Everyone likes Costco. Everyone  knows what Costco is . But no one likes Costco as much as this girl. Or at least that’s what she wants you to think.

All Costco is in this essay is a vehicle for her to explain how she thinks and feels. I covered it in the “Show don’t tell” section after the second paragraph. And that is by far the most compelling paragraph in the essay. I found myself less enamored with what came after, simply because I don’t think I got that same sense of discovery or interest about either the store or her.

If I were to touch this draft up, I would want her to talk more about why this sense of wonderment is only possible at Costco and/or connect Costco to herself more directly. I think too much of her work was based upon “Costco has a lot of stuff.” And it does! But that’s only a part of what makes Costco Costco. Walmart has giant TVs and people watching galore, too.

Where were the free samples? The frozen meat room to hang out in on a hot day? The guy spending seven seconds at the exit to make sure all $543 worth of stuff you bought you paid for?  Where were the free samples?

Then I would have wanted those free samples to link back to her life in more believable, more explanatory ways. I mention that the piece started to wander into parody territory for me, and that was because her rationales stopped being believable for what she was describing. I’m fine suspending my disbelief that Costco is her mecca. Totally cool. But if I start getting confused or losing the logic behind what she says, it all turns into word soup.

She also could have bailed on Costco sooner and opened things up more naturally. Instead of the “getting my shit in” section, the entire second half could have been a more natural explanation of how her wonderment at Costco matches her wonderment in life. I just didn’t find what she wrote in the final third credible.

(I FOUND THE FREE SAMPLES! THEY WERE IN THE PARAGRAPH I LIKED!)

But they’re mentioned briefly and then tossed aside. I think that was a huge mistake. That stuff is the gold in this essay. I would have had her cut a couple of lines from paragraph two and bring them back in as their own paragraphs. “ I was a conquistador, but rather than searching the land for El Dorado, I scoured aisles for free samples.”  has way more juice in it than just that one line. It’s such a good line, tho.

I legit think what happened is she got 300 words into this piece and went, “wait, what else does Costco have?” That’s why she started to have to reach for more generic and less important stuff to her.

That second paragraph is fantastic. And it’s why I liked the essay so much more the first time I read it then when I delved deeper. That paragraph was so good that my takeaway was “PRO WRITER DID IT.” I’m not so sure anymore. I think a pro would have guided her better to hit a lot of the same notes I wanted to see in the second half.

I figure a lot of people will like that second paragraph and then kind of skim the rest. Maybe that works. Reminds me of those 80-classic-rock-hits collections you can buy where the first song is  Freebird  and you’re like  Oh shit Freebird  but then you buy it and there’s also  Life in the Fastlane  and that’s not bad but then songs 3-80 you’ve never heard of except for  Whiskey in the Jar  which you only know because you got really into Thin Lizzy when you were 14.

I still give it like a 7.5. It seems a lot of people are split between  new paradigm  and  actually bad.  I see a good essay with an ingenious framing device that overshoots its load early and could have used structural changes to make it truly pop.

What do you think?

Want more?  Check out my FREE strategy guide on the “Why College” essay.

Like this? You might also like:

(This piece won the 2020  r/applyingtocollege  acorn award for most helpful post! It’s probably the most important thing I’ve ever written. Half-ideas is such fire omg.)

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How to Write a Costco Essay that gets you to Ivy League University

We live in times when anything can go viral and make one famous. That is the case with the famous Costco essay. A high school student by the name Brittany Stinson got accepted to five Ivies after penning a college admission essay that explored her life and her abiding love for Costco, and it got the internet cheering!

At just 18 years, Brittany Stinson from Concord High School found out that her noble admission essay got her accepted to five Ivy League Universities. We are talking about Yale, University of Pennsylvania, Cornell, Dartmouth, Stanford University, and Columbia University.

Anybody who has been through high school would agree that after college, a period of emptiness and loneliness sets in. It is like one’s creativity freezes, and they begin to brainstorm in the future, which is always hazy.

Nevertheless, being accepted to higher learning institutions such as colleges or universities marks an important transition. Most students consider it a milestone. If your child is aiming to get acceptance to competitive universities, they must be ready to write something that beats the Costco college essay.

Agreeably, common app essays or personal statements define the thin line between being accepted or rejected from unis like Dartmouth or Yale.

Knowing how to write the Costco essay was written would probably help you to craft the best admission essay or a personal statement that convinces the admissions committee or board.

What is the Costco Essay? Anyway?

A stellar performance in both SATs and GPA scores cannot suffice as a criterion for admission. Instead, most universities and colleges will always demand that you write either a personal statement or an admission essay, for which they provide prompts.

The Costco Essay is an essay, also known as Brittany Stinson’s essay, and is a personal statement that got Brittany to all the Ivy League Universities or schools, including Stanford.

The Costco Personal statement is not a mere essay about Costco. Rather, it is a college essay about the experiences of the student at Costco stores. She submitted it in response to a college application prompt in 2016. The prompt read as below:

Prompt 1: Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

Given the prompt, Brittany wrote the admission essay to the best of her knowledge. And while at it, she exhibited creativity, critical thinking, and organization skills. She clearly described her meaningful experience that gave a clear description of her personality. The Costco essay also explored her relationship with the Costco wholesale retailer. Smartly, she captured the moments well relating her childhood, teenage, personal qualities, and strength and how they each related to her studies.

Thanks to her wisdom, she finally got accepted to the Ivy League, which is notorious for having a low acceptance rate, and it is hard to get to it.

You can check the Costco essay example from the Business Insider . Other essays have captured hearts, as reported by the Washington Post . Do you member the famous Pizza admission essay ? Well, it also went viral.

What can you learn on Admission Essay Writing from the Costco Essay?

A great student is one who learns through apprenticeship. The Costco college personal statement is a chance for students to learn how to write great personal statements, statements of purpose, and admission essays that win them admission to the colleges or universities of their dreams.

• Choose an outstanding topic. One of the most salient features of the Costco essay was its theme that was well reflected in the topic. Even with the personal statement prompt in place, always choose an outstanding topic for your admission essay and a personal statement alike. But the prompt is a great place to start when brainstorming about a topic. Everybody can win the hearts of the admissions committee by writing an essay about themselves or everyday experience. However, it takes a special kind of creativity to twin the theme with the topic carefully. When writing your personal statement, make sure your topic stands out. Make it short, memorable, and entertaining.
• Research and think outside the box. Although critics argue that the Costco essay or the Pizza essays, despite winning their authors admissions, are overrated, the truth is that they were well written. Each of the authors exhibits deep thinking, research, and reasoning. In her case, Brittany focused on how her family shopped at Costco. However, to make it appealing, she shared her personal experiences and how they affected the growth of her personality. In fact, she defied the mother’s wish and was willing to learn about free samples, goods, and even sales. In Papa John’s Pizza essay that won Carolina Williams an admission to Yale , the story is the same. It reflected her passion, which is an aspect that you must communicate in your college essay.
• Choose an underlying theme. Just like a poem or a book review, a personal statement with a realizable theme is not only informative but also entertaining. In the case of Brittany, she explored the themes of passion, defiance for the best purpose, commitment, and patience. The Brittany Costco paper reflects a good grasp of the English language, the flow of ideas, and use of vocabulary such as “finitude” or “juxtaposed” which makes the themes easy to spot. Even though, as this is a Costco essay analysis, we insist that you choose vocabularies that fit the context. But you do not have to write an essay on Costco, find the best experience that wows you, and nail it!
• Set the Tone. Another thing about the famous Costco college essay or the Brittany Costco essay is evident in the tone that the writer used. While it is official or formal writing, Brittany twisted the nuts and squeezed the juice right into the rightful mouths. Humor and seriousness are neatly woven into the essay in a manner that it attains its purpose. We have written the best personal statements for students, but reading this helped us set the bar higher. While she describes herself as obstinate with “chubby” legs, she acknowledges that she was driven with purpose - to acquire knowledge, which sarcastically elicits good moods. So, when you want to write a personal statement that will get you admission to any college or university, go the Costco personal statement way- make your tone memorable and conspicuous.

How to Write a Personal Statement and Get Accepted to Any University

There are great lessons we can learn from Costco's personal statement. Instead of creating something similar, follow the steps below to craft the best personal statement:

• Every excellent paper be it a personal statement was once an idea in the brain. When writing personal statements, we always encourage our writers to brainstorm with the clients. Go through your personal experiences growing up and trace when the passion kicked in to study what you yearn to study. Listen to yourself, sweep through your past, and relax as you plan the paper.
• Be Original, Always. Well, there are many personal statements and admission essay examples online. However, it would help if you only read through them as an inspiration and not a direct reference for your personal statement template. When writing a common app essay, imagine your personal experiences and relate them with the college essay prompts. For instance, if you liked watching baseball or playing hockey, critically show how they influenced you with team spirit, dedication, and resilience. Sometimes, connect your experiences to past academic performances.
• Simplicity is King! As with the Costco college essay, where Brittany totally kept everything straightforward and sporadically threw in vocabularies, your college essay should be simple. We have been writing college essays and how we simply connect experiences to academic performances, and passion always leaves our clients aghast!
• Be Confident and remain Unapologetic. The Costco essays show the side of Brittany that is unapologetic for the past, which makes her win over her audience. She boldly claims that she went against her mother’s wishes, but it was all for a great course. If your past mistakes made you fail, be bold enough to connect them with ideas that later got you on toes! And when you write a personal statement boldly and bravely, there is a 100% chance of getting accepted.
• Be truthful; do not fake it to make it. When writing a personal statement for college, do not let your creativity and imagination lead you to create unsustainable lies. Like in the Costco college essay, always maintain the truth as it is even when it hurts. Truth has its way of winning hearts, but that is only the opposite in the criminal justice system.
• Proofread, Re-read, edit, Repeat! It is always great to spend time combing through your completed personal statement. If you have that weakness or are too tired to do it, seek the services of essay editing services online . There are some glaring mistakes and latent ideas that can flaw an Ivy League equivalent essay, and a third eye can spot the errors.

Should Applicants Read the Costco College Essay?

Well, like many other free college essay samples, the Costco application essay can enthuse confidence for anybody writing an application essay. The example shows how to write a personal statement without fear. It is also a great personal essay template, especially for graduate school essays. The graduate school essays require a critical, in-depth, and logical approach.

Reading the Costco essay will acquaint you with how to use transition words, vocabulary, and hooks in personal statements.

Nevertheless, the Costco essay is not a gold standard. There are other essays that were written and published online to be accessed as free personal statement examples. So, even as you read, don’t be blinded not to research. There are many templated and formats on the internet. There is a risk of plagiarizing an essay such as the Costco college essay when many applicants read it.

So, only gain inspiration to write a well-crafted, edited, and organized college personal statement!

Can someone help with Writing College Personal Essays?

If you are getting ready to write an application essay and do not understand how we can help, our custom college essay writing service is all you need.  We offer personal statement writing assistance at affordable rates.

Even though you might feel like the Costco essay type is the best, our writers will surprise you even more. We have even related high-school failures to personalities and gotten many students admissions and acceptance to college.

Note that we only provide sample college admission essays and coach students through our essay writers. Gradecrest also offers other range of writing services such as paper writing services. We also help students with term papers, research papers, capstone projects, book reviews, article critiques, and book reports.

In short, you can trust us with an application essay for any program, and we will get you a great writer in your field.

Gradecrest is a professional writing service that provides original model papers. We offer personalized services along with research materials for assistance purposes only. All the materials from our website should be used with proper references. See our Terms of Use Page for proper details.

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How to write costco essay that gets you into ivy league.

November 6, 2019

Is your child applying to go to college?

If your answer is yes, then you probably know what a common app essay or personal statement is and why universities like Yale and Dartmouth demand it before they can accept your child.

If your answer is no, then you need to read on to find out how Brittany Stinson wrote the Costco essay that got her accepted into all Ivy League schools so you can help your son or daughter to do the same too.

What is Costco Essay?

Costco essay is a personal statement or a college essay that a student by the name of Brittany Stinson wrote in 2016 that got her accepted into all 5 Ivy League schools. She wrote about her love for the Costco stores. She highlighted all the different aspects of the store that helped build her character and interest in her studies. So what was special about her Costco common app essay that made it so successful?

• The Topic . People write about their personal experiences every day. But, until this time, no one had written about how a store shaped the person they are; this made the Costco essay theme outstanding. So, when writing your personal statement, ensure to make it stand out by disclosing parts of who you are that make you unique. And, remember to be creative too.
• Dig Deep. Brittany could have focused on how her family shopped at Costco. But to make her essay worth reading, she went deep by sharing her experiences there and how those experiences affected her personality growth. Brittany narrated how she would explore the store, against her mother’s wish, and learn more about free samples, sales, and goods. She connected each experience with her desire to achieve success in fields that interest her.
• Elegance and Clarity . Brittany wrote the Costco essay with so much elegance and clarity that anyone would have put everything aside just to read through each prose.
• The Tone. In her Costco essay, Brittany describes herself as “an unruly child with chubby legs blinded by her greed for knowledge” this must have sparked laughter. She then goes ahead to explain what interests her and how her determination got her to where she is at the moment. Not only was that smart, but it was the glaze that made her personal statement outstanding.

How can you help your child compose such a paper without writing about Costco or using the same format Brittany used?

• Start here. Read the Costco college essay; it can be a great writing help if you do not know where to start. It shows you what’s unique about it, the language and tone, and how each story and sentence connect seamlessly. It’s ideal for sparking your own inspiration if you feel lost with your own personal statement.
• Brainstorm . After reading that, sit down and brainstorm your own unique ideas that can make your Costco Ivy League essay stand out. As you brainstorm, listen to yourself and concentrate on your creativity. Next, shift through your ideas and arrange them in the correct order.
• Originality. You do not want to submit a common app essay that someone else has already presented. Instead, you want to imagine your experience from a different perspective and present it in a format that is unique to you. For example, if you were addicted to Sabrina The Teenage Witch , find a way to show how it helped develop your character or interest in something. Did you ever imagine yourself flying on a broom or casting spells? Explain how that impacted your academics; simply find an original perspective.
• Keep it stupid simple . In the Costco college essay, Brittany cleverly explains how her adventures in the store affected her interests in different subjects at school. So, find a simple way to connect your experience to your academic performance.
• Confidence. People can sniff insecurities even through your writing; because of this, you must be bold and brave with your words. It goes a long way in showing your confidence to the rest of the world.
• The Truth Will Set You Free . You may want to make your essay interesting by adding a few elements to it, make sure that everything you include in the Costco college essay is truthful. If you lie, and you are accepted into your school of choice, your true self will eventually come to light. So, don’t lie.
• Edit. Make sure to edit your work to ensure all the loose ends tie together. You can also ask friends and family to read it and then provide feedback on what they think you should improve or change.

In conclusion, now that you know what made Brittany Stinson’s Costco essay stand out and what to do to help your kid write their own, there is nothing stopping him or her from getting into the Ivy League school of their choice.

Take a break from writing.

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