discover yourself essay

How to Begin Your Self-Discovery Journey: 16 Best Questions

As part of this process, we must not only search to determine what constitutes our true selves, but let go of objects of identification we’ve long mistaken for ourselves, requiring a balance of introspection and new experiences.

So let’s set sail.

In this article, we’ll give you a range of powerful questions to help you along your journey of self-discovery and point you toward further reading and resources.

Before you continue, you might like to download our three Meaning and Valued Living Exercises for free . These creative, science-based exercises will help you learn more about your values, motivations, and goals and will give you the tools to inspire a sense of meaning in the lives of your clients, students, or employees.

This Article Contains:

What is self-discovery according to psychology, fostering self-discovery skills: 10 examples & tips, why is the process important, a look at self-discovery coaching, 3 exercises, games, and activities for adults, best worksheets and journal prompts, 16 questions to ask yourself or your clients, helpful books & apps for your journey, tools from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

Drawing often from the field of philosophy , psychologists point to the illumination of our daimon (or ‘true self’) as the ultimate goal of self-discovery.

Formally defined, this true self is

“the central inner force common to all human beings and yet unique to each, which is the deep source of growth… [that is] free, healthy development in accordance with the potentials of one’s generic and individual nature.”

Horney, 1950, p. 17

As part of the process of searching for our true selves, we are ultimately working to identify three things (Waterman, 2011):

• Personal potentials
• Our purposes for living
• Opportunities to act upon those potentials and purposes in living

The search for our true selves, therefore:

“refers to those processes, both intuitive and reasoned, by which those [personal, purpose-related] potentials are discovered and come to attain the status of personally concordant goals that are to be actualized.”

Waterman, 2011, p. 360

According to this view, a person’s true self essentially lies beneath the surface, and our task is to find, recognize, or understand that which already exists. Once you have, you can then make choices about your life and identity that are more consistent with this self-knowledge (Waterman, 2011).

Seek a supportive atmosphere

The more time we spend in the presence of supportive family, friends, lovers, and communities , the sooner we will be likely to discover our true nature. This is because warm and encouraging atmospheres facilitate feelings of inner security while providing the freedom to have our own feelings and thoughts (Horney, 1950).

To this end, here are some ideas to consider:

• Seek quiet spaces and time out to facilitate reflection or journaling .
• Join a social group whose interests and passions align with your own, such as a painting, writing, or poetry group.
• Find a coach or therapist for a safe space to pursue self-discovery.
• Set boundaries with people who discourage your individuality, negatively affect your emotions, or put you down.
• Seek the company of people who inspire you, make you feel positive, and challenge your perception of yourself.

Identify your drifts

Pay close attention to the things you naturally love doing, or drifts, particularly those that are personally expressive . By paying attention to the subconscious pull of these activities, you can allow them to guide you toward your true self, stemming from your genetic makeup, upbringing, and experiences (Pagedar, 2021).

• Our drifts tend to emerge when the mind is still, so try selecting a quiet day to do some meditation or practice some relaxation techniques.
• Try to notice activities that cause you to slip into the state of flow , as these often point us toward our drifts.
• Consider which activities you possess a natural aptitude or talent for, perhaps using a strengths-finding exercise .
• Think about which activities you find intrinsically motivating . These are the activities you would undertake in the absence of external rewards, such as money or the approval of others.
• Notice times when you feel a strong sense of personal responsibility to do something or have a unique vision about how something should be carried out.

Download 3 Meaning & Valued Living Exercises (PDF)

These detailed, science-based exercises will equip you or your clients with tools to find meaning in life help and pursue directions that are in alignment with values.

Download 3 Free Meaning Tools Pack (PDF)

By filling out your name and email address below.

To understand why self-discovery is so important, we must consider the consequences of failing to identify our true selves.

According to Horney (1950), when a person experiences a large discrepancy between their lived and real selves, they are likely to experience a sense of alienation from themselves. This remains true even if the person is successful in their activities and receives external rewards.

Such a person may often notice themselves wondering, “ Why am I doing this when it’s not who I really am? ” The consequence is a feeling of guilt or dissatisfaction if we fail to live up to an idealized version of ourselves that we cannot be.

Besides this negative emotional toll, the problem with pursuing such an ideal is that it will be rooted in externally derived standards of worth.

To illustrate, here are some examples:

• A student feels pressure from their parents to pursue a prestigious career in law, even though this line of work does not inspire them.
• A famous musician has mistaken their true self with their like of the status, prestige, and social validation they receive while performing.
• A woman’s family talks her into finding a husband and settling down when she’d rather travel the world with her friends.
• A son feels obligated to take over the family business when he’d prefer to start his own venture.

When we cannot live in alignment with our true selves, we must spend energy attempting to deny and distort our experiences to make sense of a pervasive lack of happiness and personal fulfillment. This ongoing effort can go so far as to produce psychological states and conditions such as depression (Waterman et al., 2010).

This is why self-discovery is so important.

Our goal in life should not be to pursue imagined or externally derived ideals, but rather to develop a more realistic understanding of our strengths and limitations. By doing so, we can avoid negative psychological states and self-actualize , feel contentment, and make better contributions to the world.

A growing trend in coaching, self-discovery coaching is about looking beyond specific goal pursuits (e.g., “I want to improve my self-esteem ”) to discover how we can live authentically and be truly happy .

Self-discovery coaching has many components, including (Elevate Life Project, n.d.):

• Exploring your values to live in congruence with what’s most important to you
• Discovering grounded confidence, centeredness, and strength
• Identifying your abilities for making easier decisions

The role of a self-discovery coach in this process is to act as co-pilot on a client’s journey toward authentic fulfillment by challenging them, imbuing them with courage, and showing compassion.

If you or your clients are looking to set off on a self-discovery journey, consider the following fun and insightful activities to get you started.

This exercise is a useful starting point for viewing yourself clearly in terms of values, beliefs, and more. The exercise guides users through a two-step process of considering themselves from the perspective of others, followed by a consideration of their self-perceptions at different times in their life.

Spontaneous collage

Collage is a fun and cathartic method of self-discovery that helps people bypass the socially protective aspects of the mind and reveal aspects of their authentic self. Best of all, no previous art experience is required.

For a great resource, check out Shelley Klammer’s 12-week online course and check out the #collageforselfdiscovery hashtag on Instagram to get inspired by others’ collages.

Kokology: The Game of Self-Discovery

Created by famous Japanese psychologists Tadahiko Nagao and Isamu Saito, kokology , the study of kokoro (“mind” or “spirit” in Japanese), is a fun and sometimes hilarious game for learning about yourself.

The game invites players to answer questions about seemingly innocent topics, such as the color of an imaginary bird that has flown in their window, to reveal profound insights in their answers.

Journaling and worksheets can both be hugely helpful for this purpose.

To help, look at some of the following free resources from our site:

• Self-Awareness Worksheet for Adults This worksheet poses a series of 15 questions to help you discover more about your true self. Specifically, the questions tap into topics such as your talents/strengths, values, and barriers to living more authentically.
• What Are My Qualities and Traits? This worksheet invites you to identify your top five and weakest two qualities from a list of 100 strengths. It then invites you to consider how you might shape, develop, and use your toolkit of identified strengths to better your life.
• Reflecting on Three Things This worksheet invites you to explore what defines who you are. These reflections can include statements, objects, roles in life, people you admire, and ambitions.

If you’re more into journaling, see if any of the following prompts might inspire some of your upcoming entries (Hollis, 2019):

• What things have you been doing lately that may be positively or negatively affecting your mental health ?
• What ways can you touch or move your body that makes you feel good?
• If you could spend the day doing anything, what would you do?
• How do you show love to other people?
• What are some things about you that you wish other people knew?

How to discover your authentic self – at any age – Bevy Smith

For more ways to get started on your journey of self-inquiry, consider the following questions, drawn from leading books designed to guide you toward self-discovery (see Helpful Books & Apps for Your Journey ):

Mindful self-discovery questions

• What’s going on inside your body at the moment (e.g., sensations, flows of energy)?
• Is there joy, ease, and lightness in what you are doing at the present moment?
• Do you really have any problems right now in this present moment ?
• Is there anything you can do to change, improve, or remove yourself from a present dissatisfactory situation? If not, how can you move toward accepting your present circumstances?

Exploring values

• What are your top five personal and professional values?
• How are you living outside your values?
• In what areas do you feel a personal sense of responsibility to better the world?
• How are you living outside of your integrity?

Questions about fear and courage

• What do you fear the most?
• What fears have actually come true in your life?
• What would happen if you treated the actions you fear as an experiment?
• For which pending decision could you use 10% more courage?

Considering worthwhile experiences

• What has made your childhood worthwhile?
• What lessons did you learn last week?
• What makes life worthwhile for you?
• What trip have you always wanted to take, and how could you make this trip happen?

More questions for self-discovery

For even more powerful coaching questions, be sure to check out some of the dedicated articles throughout our blog:

• 73 Powerful Coaching Questions to Ask Your Clients
• 100 Most Powerful Life Coaching Questions [+PDF]
• Self-Coaching Model Explained: 56 Questions & Techniques for Self-Mastery

Here are some of our favorite books and apps to support greater self-insight and discovery.

1. The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment – Eckhart Tolle

A critical first step toward greater self-insight involves ceasing to confuse your true self with the endless stream of thoughts flowing through your mind.

The bestselling book The Power of Now  takes readers on a journey to find their deepest self through the lens of mindfulness and spirituality.

The book guides the reader through steps to help recognize and free themselves from ego in the form of defense mechanisms, automatic negative habits, and over-identification with thought. From here, readers can then discover their true nature and lasting contentment, rooted in the present moment.

Find the book on Amazon .

2. Self-Discovery Questions: 155 Breakthrough Questions to Accelerate Massive Action – Barrie Davenport

Not all of us have the resources to employ a self-discovery coach, making it all the more important to know what questions to ask on your self-discovery journey.

Barrie Davenport’s book of 155 powerful questions is a perfect companion for self-reflection and journaling, helping readers become less reactive and take charge of their lives and destiny.

Once you become acquainted with your answers, you can strengthen self-awareness , break out of automatic patterns, and feel empowered to make positive new life changes.

3. The 365 Self-Discovery Journal: One Year of Reflection & Development – Created by 21 Exercises

Journaling remains one of the best ways to pursue self-discovery and greater self-insight (Charles, 2010).

This book provides journal lovers with a year’s worth of challenging and original questions to guide self-discovery.

By combining each prompt with thought-provoking poems and quotes, this book is an excellent tool to help steadily expand the reader’s comfort zone and curiosity across domains ranging from career and finances to love and relationships.

4. The Quenza app

Quenza was designed by our very own team as a one-stop resource for coaches and psychologists wishing to remotely support their clients’ self-inquiry between scheduled sessions.

The app links with an online dashboard and growing library of science-backed activities you can customize and send directly to your clients’ smart devices, including audio meditations, guided visualizations, and many thought-provoking reflections.

Try the app, platform, and entire library of pre-built activities for 30 days for just $1.

5. The Waking Up app

While Western takes on meditation tend to emphasize health and stress reduction, there is much more we can discover about ourselves through this powerful practice.

Waking Up , developed by philosopher and neuroscientist Sam Harris, features a rich array of audio-based meditations, exercises, and conversations with leading experts and teachers to help you make profound discoveries about the nature of your own mind.

This app is a top-rated resource for those seeking to dismantle illusions of the self and rediscover their true nature and purpose.

6. The Reflectly app

With the growing recognition of journaling as a tool for self-insight, new technologies are emerging to support this powerful practice.

Reflectly is a modern journaling app for self-care and greater happiness. Drawing on evidence-based approaches from positive psychology, mindfulness, and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy, this app serves as an AI companion to help you manage negative thoughts and find greater happiness.

Among its personalized functions, the app includes daily quotes, a mood tracker , and personalized insights via its reporting features.

Throughout this post, we’ve discussed the importance of clarifying values to better understand what brings meaning throughout one’s journey of self-discovery. To this end, we invite you to check out our free Meaning & Valued Living Exercises Pack .

This pack features three of our top tools from the Positive Psychology Toolkit©, all of which center on the theme of values-based living:

• The Top 5 Values This exercise draws on key principles of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy to help clients begin brainstorming their values. Following this, clients will then prioritize these values in a list to identify those most central to who they are.
• Self-Eulogy This exercise invites clients to consider how they’d like to be remembered at their funeral as a means to identify and clarify values. Based on this, they can then consider how well they are living in alignment with these values.
• The Scoreboard Metaphor This exercise helps clients recognize how to enact their values through goal-setting. In particular, it draws on the metaphor of a basketball game to illustrate how living into one’s values is an ongoing process and that the paths by which we pursue our goals are opportunities to enact our values in daily life.

You can access all three exercises for free by downloading our Meaning & Valued Living Exercises Pack .

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others discover meaning, this collection contains 17 validated meaning tools for practitioners. Use them to help others choose directions for their lives in alignment with what is truly important to them.

17 Tools To Encourage Meaningful, Value-Aligned Living

This 17 Meaning & Valued Living Exercises [PDF] pack contains our best exercises for helping others discover their purpose and live more fulfilling, value-aligned lives.

Created by Experts. 100% Science-based.

Self-discovery is an ongoing process of stripping away that which is unimportant, reviewing our core values, and seeking to live in greater alignment with these inner truths.

Importantly, anyone can take steps toward greater self-knowledge . All that’s required is an attitude of curiosity and regular time out for meditation, reflection, or self-questioning.

We hope this article has left you feeling equipped for your journey of self-discovery, and if you decide to try out any of the tools or exercises we’ve explored, be sure to let us know in the comments.

We’d love to hear from you.

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Meaning and Valued Living Exercises for free .

• 21 Exercises. (2018).  The 365 self-discovery journal: One year of reflection & development.  Author.
• Charles, J. P. (2010). Journaling: Creating space for “I”. Creative Nursing , 16 (4), 180–184.
• Davenport, B. (2015).  Self-discovery questions: 155 Breakthrough questions to accelerate massive action.  Bold Living Press.
• Elevate Life Project. (n.d.). Self discovery coaching . Retrieved October 11, 2021 from https://elevatelifeproject.com/self-discovery-coaching/
• Hollis, B. (2019, July 16). Who am I? Journaling prompts for self-discovery and self-reflection. Learning to Be Free . Retrieved October 11, 2021 from https://www.learningtobefree.com/2019/07/16/journaling-prompts-for-self-discovery/
• Horney, K. (1950). Neurosis and human growth: The struggle toward self-realization . Norton.
• Pagedar, A. (2021). Finding awareness: The journey of self-discovery . Author.
• Tolle, E. (2004).  The power of now: A guide to spiritual enlightenment.  New World Library.
• Waterman, A. S. (2011). Eudaimonic identity theory: Identity as self-discovery. In S. Schwartz, K. Luyckx, & V. Vignoles (Eds.), Handbook of identity theory and research (pp. 357–379). Springer.
• Waterman, A. S., Schwartz, S. J., Zamboanga, B. L., Ravert, R. D., Williams, M. K., Bede Agocha, V., … Brent Donnellan, M. (2010). The Questionnaire for Eudaimonic Well-Being: Psychometric properties, demographic comparisons, and evidence of validity. The Journal of Positive Psychology , 5 (1), 41–61.

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What our readers think.

This is a great article for self-discovery, I recommend it to all, it’s a must read for the young minds.

Thanks to a great counselor. I appreciate your encouragement and efforts that have served as an eyes opener to self discovery and other resources that is helpful.

You have some great resources listed here in this article. Thanks for the great read! -Ryan

Appreciated, Nicole, for insight well done to start kicking where need be. Keep up te good work!

Thanks Nicole. I will explore some of the resources which sounds great. I work with medical students, some of whom are at the very beginning of learning reflective approaches to enhance their self knowledge. The challenge is always to find a variety of ways to promote engagement. You have given me some helpful ideas.

Thank You Dr, Nicole.

I have left you a message on LinkedIn.

Thank you so much for this wonderful article. Very useful and helps in the journey of self awareness and so helpful to the therapist and counselors who are using these resources to support clients. Heartfelt thanks and gratitude for all the resources that benefit the clients and counselors who otherwise would not be able to access such great quality articles and resources. Thank you. As a counselor who is doing a lot of free counseling these resources and articles are so helpful, cause I cannot afford them otherwise. Thanks for supporting the counselors and therapist and clients who ultimately benefit.

Thanks, Nicole … you shared a very interesting set of perspective.

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How to write the college essay: on discovering myself.

To the stressed-out senior:

October. It’s the spookiest time of the year for you… that’s right, college applications. Two years ago I was in your shoes, staring at the 650-word Common App Essay and a mountain of supplements. It’s intimidating to face the sheer amount of work you have to do to secure your future success at the tender age of 18. So many things are up in the air–it can be a time that is fraught with anxiety, insecurity, and uncertainty.

The essays, you are told over and over again by teachers, counselors, admissions officers and the ever reliable College Confidential, are where you get to show your personality. They are meant to encapsulate something that can’t come across in a polished resume or list of honors. Picture yourself meeting with your admissions officer over a cup of tea, and pouring out parts of your life story in a way that is enlightening and composed—college essays are the written equivalent. They are indeed a strategy for the admissions officer to get to know you, but that’s not the full story. What I’ve found is that writing college essays was just as insightful for me as for the admissions officer.

College essays are a clever ploy for universities to get students to rethink who they were, are, and want to be. Answering college questions gave me the arsenal and vocabulary I would need to gracefully and eloquently articulate my answers to questions I’d be asked the rest of my life: Where do you see yourself in five years? What is your biggest failure or regret? How did you overcome your biggest challenge? If you could have anyone living or dead as a dinner guest, who would it be? What are your favorite podcasts or publications? What do you deeply care about and why?

Through the process of answering these questions, I crystallized my love of storytelling into words. I got in touch with a part of myself I thought I had lost, exploring my connection to my heritage. I understood how different aspects of my life have shaped me to be brave and bold. I gave thanks to the people whose shoulders I’m standing on today. I rediscovered how much my parents love me, and how much I love my parents. I figured out who my heroes are and why I look up to them so much. And as grandiose as it sounds, it’s the truth: I recognized my life’s calling through writing my college essays.

College applications also forced me to look at why I wanted to go to college. In answering the Why ____? question, I realized there were some colleges I wanted to go to more than others. Answering Why Yale was one of the toughest questions for me—I couldn’t think of a way to write about Yale without drawing on cliches I was sure other people would include. But ultimately, I decided to prioritize honesty in the answer to that question: it was the people that attracted me the most, so I wrote about Yale’s emphasis on building community. Now that I’m here, I can truly attest to the kindness and thoughtfulness of the student body.

This is all to say, dear senior, vulnerability in your essays pays off. Let yourself find your truth, and sink into it. Let it envelope you and your state of mind as you open that Google Doc. You’re writing for admissions officers, yes, but the more important audience is yourself. Treat them like precious time capsules you will one day open in the future. These kernels, results of deep soul-searching, will resonate with your audience, whether it’s a Yale admissions officer or your future 40-year-old self. It’s a snapshot into the mind of a 18-year-old, grappling with identity, figuring out what they want on the cusp of the world. This may all change—nothing you say in a college essay is set in stone—but in this moment at least, it sings true: beautiful, brilliant, and bold.

I found myself through thousands of drafts, each a different version of me. If you trust the process, and be honest with yourself, you can find yourself too.

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College Essay: Discovering Myself

I’ve always cared a little too much about things. To be able to make people smile, to make them laugh has always seemed like the right thing for me to do. As someone who has always wanted to do good in the world, I’ve struggled with the choice between taking care of myself and worrying about other people. I’ve come a long way, both regressing and progressing at different points, but throughout it all I’ve learned so many different lessons. At least in my story, I can candidly say that my experience and other people’s experiences are the best teachers of self-exploration.

In the third grade, my troubles with caring got big. Before, I was happy with the way I was, despite the occasional bout of loneliness. My sister was by my side and with the friends I had made it seemed almost impossible for the social self-consciousness to linger longer than a day or two. Day care was a little different. I loved the sweet snacks they served, most of which I had never tried before. I found myself a little more comfortable in the  company of the Spanish teacher, who was always excited to talk to students, or in the pottery class that happened in the evenings. Even so, I found myself on the outside. The few friends I had attended only part time, leaving me alone on the schooldays between Monday and Friday. Without my sister, everything was overwhelming. Unlike the daycare I had gone to before I moved, I had no real group of friends. Eventually, I decided I wouldn’t go.

My parents didn’t like that, of course. I remember them asking me so many times to “just give it a chance” or “remember that one girl you like there?” I refused to listen. I’ve always thought that my willfulness comes from the determination of both my parents, but whatever its source, it was strong enough even then to allow me to win that argument. The path it set me on, however, was one that I couldn’t go back from as soon as I started to learn its rules.

I was never bullied in school, despite all the doubts I’ve had about myself. The experiences that I went through were a bit more quiet. Because of my desperate want to be liked, I flitted between social groups, changing myself a little for each one. The more I did it, the easier it seemed to go deeper and deeper behind the facades. By sixth grade I had built up a nearly impenetrable floodgate to keep back everything that I was sure people would find strange or unappealing; the shallow person that I showed was free of everything the status quo would reject. As much as I’ve tried to break down those walls, it’s still one of the most difficult tasks I’m facing in my life.

Over the past years, I’ve tried to unearth who I really am. Between helping people, taking care of myself and finding joy in my life, the dust of my own doubts has obscured my vision. Thankfully, quarantine has given me more time to discover that. I’ve realized that more than anything, I want the strength to stand on my own, as an individual. Even when I’m faced with pressure or judgement, I want to be able to be myself authentically. Though I’m just starting now, I’ve had a lot of time to understand my own needs. If I’m able to show that to the world, I believe that I’ll truly find myself in the place I want to be.

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How to know yourself: Tips for beginning your self-discovery journey

Jump to section

What does self-discovery mean?

How to start a self-discovery journey, 7 elements of self-discovery, why is self-discovery so important, 5 benefits of self-discovery, how to keep yourself engaged with your self-discovery journey, moving forward.

Life moves fast. We have errands to run, work to do, and commitments to uphold. Learning how to begin self-discovery could be the last thing on our mind. 

Our busy routines rarely give us time to consider what kind of life we actually want. Do you reflect on who you are while standing in line at the grocery store? Most likely, no. It can be hard to find the space to discover and become our most authentic selves . However, there are endless benefits that make taking the time worth it.

If you’re wondering how to begin self-discovery, know that the first step is making a commitment. Your journey will require you to focus, take action, and prioritize your needs. Remember, you can’t make a change without putting in the work. 

Ready to find out how to begin your self-discovery jour ney? Let’s start by defining what self-discovery is. 

Self-discovery is the process of understanding your true self: your values, your needs and wants, even what food you like and dislike. You might have naturally learned some of these things about yourself over time. Yet, for a lot of people, we have a way of losing touch with our values and hiding our own motivations and preferences, even from ourselves. Going deeper into self-discovery can transform your life. 

It’s one thing to know your personality type or your favorite meal. But true self-discovery starts when you evaluate your life and think about what’s energizing and what's not. What will bring more joy into your life? What inspires you to jump out of bed each morning? 

Once you’ve discovered more about yourself, you’ll have an easier time finding your life purpose and being your authentic self in work as well as in personal life. Understanding what’s been missing from your life will help you learn about yourself. 

But don’t think you can finish this journey overnight. Self-discovery is an ongoing process. It requires you to dive in and examine all areas of your life and take the time to reflect . You’ll need courage and resilience to stick with the process — in the process of looking inward, you may learn things about yourself that you find hard to accept . 

Discovering your inner self also requires lots of self-awareness , otherwise known as self-knowledge. Self-knowledge usually refers to your knowledge of your own feelings, beliefs, and desires . If you have more of this in your life, you’ll have better emotional regulation . This will help you better your personal and work relationships and improve your stress management . 

Knowing more about the way your mind works also improves your empathy, helps you exercise better self-control, be more creative, and have higher self-esteem. You’ll even be more honest as a result. 

There are endless benefits to learning how to start a self-discovery journey. The important thing is to take the first step and get started. 

You may feel intimidated by the prosp ect of embarking on a journey of self-discovery. Where do you even begin? The steps to self-discovery aren’t set in stone. That means you can start with whatever action feels right for you. Remember that having the courage to begin this journey is already admirable, so keep that momentum going.

Here are 11 tips you can follow to learn how to discover yourself:

• Work to be your best self each day, no matter what you’re doing
• Take risks and try new things
• Hone in on your passions and what makes you excited
• Understand your strengths and think about how you can apply them everywhere
• Start journaling your thoughts so you can reflect on them later
• Make sure you surround yourself with people who support you
• Learn from your mistakes and move on
• Think back to your childhood and connect with your inner child again
• Be curious and ask questions
• Build habits that support your personal growth and goals
• Practice positive self-talk and reward yourself for your wins

Discovering your true self will help you feel more confident in your decision-making abilities. This is true for all areas of your life because self-discovery helps you understand yourself on a deep level. You’ll know better than anyone else what’s good for you.

As you work to improve your sense of self-awareness, here are seven elements to keep in mind:

• Reflect on where you started and what you’re accomplishing each day
• Zero in on what gives you energy and what zaps your energy
• Visualize the person you want to be
• Follow where your passions and interests lead you
• Let go of your inner critic and any self-doubt
• Choose a life of meaning and be purposeful with your actions
• Be proud of your power, grit, and resilience during challenging times

BetterUp offers the guidance and objective support — not to mention accountability — that you need to start your journey. We’ll help you chart an organized and purposeful plan toward self-discovery.

Self-discovery is important because it helps us live more meaningful lives. You learn how to take better care of yourself when you understand yourself. Plus, you might find a more fulfilling career if you’re connected to your true self. And if you’re on a career path you’re truly passionate about, you’re more likely to succeed . 

Perhaps you’ll learn that, although you’re an introvert, you’re also a people person. Taking care of our social health is always important, but maybe you need more social connection than you’d initially realized.

This also gives you more clarity on what you want your future to look like. By understanding yourself, you can chart a future that satisfies your needs and supports your well-being . Without self-discovery, you won’t live the most passionate and fulfilling life possible. 

Let’s say that you do some reflecting and realize that your favorite projects at work are the ones you lead . That probably means that you have a talent or a passion for leadership. With that in mind, you can work to become a manager . You’ll have a clearer career path and find a role that you’re more passionate about. 

And when you know yourself, you can recognize your strengths and weaknesses. Maybe you’re skilled at mindfulness , empathy, or compassion . Or you could be an amazing writer or public speaker . The best way to find out is to begin your self-discovery journey. 

This process can help you see where you need to grow, too. If you need to strengthen your communication skills , for example, taking the time to reflect on yourself will show you that.

The impact of your self-discovery will touch other people’s lives, too. You can put your newly sharpened skills to work in your social life and form deeper relationships . This authenticity will help you become a better friend, coworker, and family member. 

The road to self-discovery can look different for many people. But for everyone, it brings benefits that help you become your true self.

To put that into perspective, here are 5 benefits that you can experience after finding yourself:

1. Your relationships will thrive

Your relationships will be healthier when you better understand your core values and what you want out of your life. You’ll be able to identify toxic traits — yours or not — and solve deeper issues you have. You can then improve your social health by being more honest and open.

2. You’ll experience less self-criticism

Rather than criticize every mistake you make , you’ll know that mistakes sometimes happen because we’re human. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Plus, with more self-awareness, you’ll learn to avoid some mistakes. Understanding why you’ve made an error is the first step to preventing it from happening again.

3. You’ll feel more creative

Self-expression is key for letting others know how you feel and for becoming more creative . But how can you express yourself if you don’t know who you are? Self-reflection will help you find your identity and learn how to express it.

4. You’ll have a better ability to focus on what you truly want

The ongoing process of discovering yourself requires you to be committed and focused . That practice will help you set and achieve goals with a better sense of self in mind. You can plan a future that embodies who you really are.

5. Your self-confidence will increase

Believing in yourself and your abilities can impact your professional and personal life. With more confidence, you’ll walk into new experiences as a whole person ™, not someone who shies away from challenges or change. And as you begin your journey of self-improvement, your confidence will continue to grow.

Self-discovery isn’t something that you start and finish in one afternoon. It could take months, a year, or more to get to a point where you feel content with what you’ve discovered.

Throughout that process, here are a few ways you can keep yourself engaged and learning:

• Stay organized with the career and person goals you’re working to achieve
• Find journal prompts that keep you stimulated and thinking
• Listen to podcasts, read books, and watch videos about other people’s journeys to make you feel inspired
• Ask yourself questions like “Why do I like these things?” or “What impact do I want my choices to have on my life?”

Remember, finding your true self and defining your life purpose will be more than worth it. 

The journey of self-discovery doesn’t involve only thinking about the future. It asks you to take a look at your past, too. Spending time revisiting past feelings and experiences can be tough. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help from your friends and family.

Knowin g how to begin self-discovery is only the first step. In this process, you’ll need to get out of your comfort zone and ask yourself some hard questions. As you start, feel proud of yourself. It’s never too late to become more in touch with yourself and you’ll be so grateful you took the leap.

If you feel like you need some extra accountability to stay focused, BetterUp can help. You can experience what it’s like to reach new heights with a support system that brings out the best in you.

Discover your authentic self

Kickstart your path to self-discovery and self-awareness. Our coaches can guide you to better understand yourself and your potential.

Elizabeth Perry, ACC

Elizabeth Perry is a Coach Community Manager at BetterUp. She uses strategic engagement strategies to cultivate a learning community across a global network of Coaches through in-person and virtual experiences, technology-enabled platforms, and strategic coaching industry partnerships. With over 3 years of coaching experience and a certification in transformative leadership and life coaching from Sofia University, Elizabeth leverages transpersonal psychology expertise to help coaches and clients gain awareness of their behavioral and thought patterns, discover their purpose and passions, and elevate their potential. She is a lifelong student of psychology, personal growth, and human potential as well as an ICF-certified ACC transpersonal life and leadership Coach.

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How to stop being jealous by cultivating self-love, reinventing yourself: 10 ways to realize your full potential, 10 self-discovery techniques to help you find yourself, tune in to the self discovery channel with 10 tips for finding yourself, leveraging humanistic psychology to achieve self-actualization, learning curves: the role of self-compassion at work, how to give yourself a boost and start feeling better, self-esteem isn't everything, but these 5 tips can give you a boost, similar articles, the importance of knowing yourself: your key to fulfillment, finding the way back to you — 9 tips on how to find yourself, discovering your true north makes life easier: here's why, get to know yourself through the act of self-reflection, 50 self-discovery questions for getting to know the real you, 90 journal prompts for self-discovery to get the ink flowing, stay connected with betterup, get our newsletter, event invites, plus product insights and research..

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How to Write a Compelling Essay About Yourself: Practical Tips and Techniques

1. find your focus, 1.1 identify your strengths, 1.2 hone your unique voice, 2. create a strong outline, 2.1 organize your thoughts, 2.2 prioritize your points, 3. use engaging writing techniques, 3.1 employ active verbs, 3.2 use varied vocabulary, 3.3 avoid excess enthusiasm, 4. share personal anecdotes, 4.1 be authentic, 4.2 create relatable experiences, 5. proofread and revise, 5.1 use grammarly, 5.2 read aloud for flow, 5.3 ask for feedback.

Writing a compelling essay about yourself might seem challenging at first, but it can be an enjoyable and fulfilling experience with the right approach. In this blog, we'll explore practical tips and techniques to help you create a captivating essay that showcases your unique story. By learning how to start an essay about yourself, you'll gain valuable insights into your strengths, voice, and experiences, which can shape your future writing endeavors. Let's dive in!

Before you begin writing your essay, it's essential to find your focus and determine what you want to convey in your narrative. This process involves identifying your strengths and honing your unique voice to create an authentic and engaging essay.

As you prepare to write your essay, consider the following steps to identify your strengths:

• Reflect on your personal experiences, achievements, and challenges
• Make a list of your hobbies, interests, and values
• Ask friends and family for their insights and opinions on your unique qualities
• Consider what sets you apart from others and how you can showcase these attributes in your essay

By recognizing and emphasizing your strengths, you'll be better equipped to create an engaging and memorable essay that resonates with readers.

Developing your unique voice is a crucial aspect of writing a compelling essay about yourself. To hone your voice, try the following techniques:

• Write consistently: Practice writing regularly to become more comfortable with your writing style and tone.
• Read widely: Expose yourself to various writing styles by reading different genres, authors, and publications. This can help you identify elements you'd like to incorporate into your own voice.
• Experiment: Don't be afraid to try new styles, formats, or perspectives in your writing. This can help you discover what works best for your unique voice.
• Be true to yourself: Remember to stay authentic and genuine in your writing. Your voice should reflect your personality and experiences, so don't try to imitate someone else's style.

By focusing on your strengths and honing your unique voice, you'll be well on your way to crafting a captivating essay that leaves a lasting impression on your readers.

Once you've identified your focus and developed your unique voice, it's time to create a strong outline for your essay. A well-organized outline will provide a clear roadmap for your writing, helping you stay on track and create a cohesive narrative.

Begin by organizing your thoughts and ideas in a logical and coherent manner. Try these steps to streamline your thought process:

• Brainstorm the main ideas or themes you want to cover in your essay
• Group related ideas and experiences together, creating sections or chapters for your essay
• Create a logical flow between these sections, ensuring a smooth transition from one idea to the next
• Remember to include an introduction and conclusion, which will frame your essay and provide context for your readers

By organizing your thoughts effectively, you'll have a clear roadmap to follow as you begin writing, making it easier to stay focused and maintain a cohesive narrative.

With your thoughts organized, it's time to prioritize the points you want to make in your essay. Consider the following tips to help you decide which aspects of your story are most important to share:

• Focus on experiences and achievements that are most relevant to your essay's theme or purpose
• Consider the impact of each point on your overall narrative: Does it add depth to your story, or is it merely a side note?
• Think about the emotional weight of each point: Are there certain experiences that carry more emotional significance for you or your readers?
• Don't be afraid to cut or condense less important points to ensure your essay remains focused and engaging

By prioritizing your points and focusing on the most impactful aspects of your story, you'll create a compelling essay that holds your readers' attention and leaves a lasting impression.

With your outline in place, it's time to start writing your essay. To make it engaging and enjoyable to read, consider incorporating some of these writing techniques:

Active verbs bring energy and clarity to your writing, making it more compelling. Instead of saying, "The award was won by me," opt for the active voice: "I won the award." Keep an eye out for passive voice constructions and replace them with active verbs to create a more dynamic and engaging narrative.

Using a diverse range of vocabulary helps keep your essay interesting and fresh. While it's important to be clear and concise, don't be afraid to mix up your word choice. Just remember to balance simplicity with variety, ensuring that your essay is accessible to readers of all ages and backgrounds.

Although it's natural to feel passionate about your experiences and achievements, be mindful of over-exaggeration or excessive enthusiasm in your writing. Maintain a balanced tone, and let your accomplishments speak for themselves. Overdoing the excitement can make your essay seem less genuine, so strive for sincerity and authenticity in your writing.

By incorporating these engaging writing techniques, you'll be well on your way to crafting a captivating essay about yourself. Now let's explore how to share personal anecdotes to make your essay even more relatable.

Personal anecdotes are the heart and soul of an essay about yourself. They help to humanize your story and allow readers to connect with you on a deeper level. Let's explore some strategies for incorporating personal anecdotes into your essay:

Authenticity is crucial when sharing personal anecdotes. Be honest and open about your experiences, even if they might seem ordinary or mundane. Readers appreciate genuine stories, and an authentic narrative will make your essay stand out. Remember, it's not always about the grandest moments in life—sometimes, it's the small, everyday moments that truly define who we are.

When sharing personal anecdotes, aim to create relatable experiences for your readers. Think about what others might have gone through and how your story can resonate with them. For instance, you could discuss your struggles with self-doubt and how you overcame them, or share a funny story that highlights your sense of humor. By creating relatable experiences, you'll draw readers in and make them feel connected to your story.

With your engaging writing techniques and personal anecdotes in place, you're almost ready to finalize your essay. But first, let's go over some essential tips for proofreading and revising your work.

Proofreading and revising your essay is a vital step in ensuring that it's polished and ready to impress readers. Here are some practical tips and techniques to help you fine-tune your work:

Grammarly is a handy tool for catching spelling, grammar, and punctuation errors in your essay. By using Grammarly, you'll ensure that your essay is free of any glaring mistakes that could distract readers from your content. Simply copy and paste your essay into the Grammarly editor, and it'll highlight any errors and suggest improvements.

Reading your essay aloud is an excellent way to check for flow and catch any awkward phrases or sentence structures. As you read, listen for any spots where you stumble or lose your train of thought—those might be areas that need revising. Reading your essay aloud can also help you identify any repetitive words or phrases, so you can replace them with more varied vocabulary for a smoother reading experience.

Getting feedback from others is invaluable when it comes to improving your essay. Share your work with a friend, family member, or teacher and ask for their honest opinion. They might notice something you missed or have suggestions for how to make your essay even stronger. Be open to their feedback and incorporate it into your revisions, as needed.

In conclusion, learning how to start an essay about yourself involves finding your focus, creating a strong outline, using engaging writing techniques, sharing personal anecdotes, and proofreading and revising your work. By following these practical tips and techniques, you'll be well on your way to crafting a compelling essay that showcases your unique story and connects with readers.

If you're feeling overwhelmed and confused about how to effectively sell yourself as a creative, don't miss the workshop ' How To Sell Yourself as a Creative When you are Confused AF ' by Jasmine MacPhee. This workshop will provide you with practical tips and strategies to confidently showcase your talents and make a lasting impression in the creative industry.

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10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

• Essay 1: Summer Program
• Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
• Essay 3: Why Medicine
• Essay 4: Love of Writing
• Essay 5: Starting a Fire
• Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
• Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
• Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
• Essay 9: Eritrea
• Essay 10: Journaling
• Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally. 

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read. 

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.”  They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great. 

Table of Contents

Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.  

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day? 

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture. 

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality. 

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration. 

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars. 

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”.  They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in. 

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite. 

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin. 

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose. 

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.  

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res  is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side.  Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents. 

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger  waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I  am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate,  perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student  from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient  streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells.  Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and  Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books  borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is.  No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted  dunes.  No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother,  her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes).  It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too  early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal  lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no  films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus  Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time.  You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the  crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells.  I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding  against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a  sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting  in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero .  I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic.  “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.”  Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential.  Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader. 

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay. 

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

Articles About Discovering Yourself: Top 5 Examples and 6 Writing Prompts

Self-discovery is a continuous journey to understand ourselves better. See our examples and prompts for articles about discovering yourself to start writing.

Those who don’t know themselves are easily influenced by others. It’s why teenagers find it hard to say no to peer pressure or try hard to fit into society. As an adult, I thought I would have grown out of the uncertainties that began when I was a teenager. However, discovering ourselves is a continuous, exciting, and frightening journey. 

Positive words will help us improve our self-perception, but it’s not enough. Learning and understanding ourselves are critical to finding our life mission and being more resilient to challenges. 

Articles About Discovering Yourself Examples

1. taking part in community helps you discover yourself by city of good, 2. discovering yourself: a guide for teens and young adults by medium.com, 3. the fascinating journey of discovering the real you by deepak chopra, m.d., 4. discover yourself by trying new things by jori hamilton, 5. 9 tips to help you kick off your self-discovery journey by crystal raypole, 1. what does it mean to discover yourself, 2. the pros and cons of discovering yourself, 3. does travel help with self-discovery, 4. discovering yourself through art and music, 5. inspiring quotes to discover yourself, 6. questions to ask in the self-discovery phase.

“We tend to read books, watch videos or look to the people around us to gain inspiration on how to shape ourselves – shaping our likes, dislikes and views on the world.”

The author believes that joining a community where a person feels comfortable or follows similar beliefs and values ​​is a great way to discover oneself. A person’s identity is not self-created but formed through life experiences and interactions with others. Building a community also contributes to self-discovery, like the example where Nicole K’s organization assisted her in finding her purpose in life.

However, the writer still reminds readers to set boundaries to balance helping the community and helping oneself. When there are no concrete boundaries, people find it difficult to say no to things they don’t want to do. In this type of self-discovery, there should be time to explore their passion and interest in the community. You might also find these essays about myself helpful.

“Determining who we ‘are’ and what our place is in this world can be a daunting task to confront. Especially if we lack life experience or we associate ourselves with various types of groups.”

The writer of the above article briefly mentions how “Be yourself” is easy to say compared to the challenging take of “Discover yourself.” Then, they discuss five quick and easy steps to help readers discover who they are. It includes defining their boundaries, strengths, understanding of the world, and goals in life.

The last step is to use doubt after discovering their true self as it’s a great driver to get more life achievements. In the end, the writer suggests readers find their true selves because it helps them become more confident, reach goals, and build stronger relationships. Check out these articles about gratitude and articles about confidence .

“In the journey of self-discovery, the true self is both goal and guide. It promises supreme fulfillment and delivers on the promise simply by being there already.”

Chopra’s article contains descriptions and examples of the ego-personality, the unconscious self, and the true self. Each person has three types of self that stand as the source of human fulfillment through which consciousness rises.

In the situation where two friends develop romantic love, the author shows how the journey of self-discovery works similarly with these three types of selves. It’s because initially, people usually mask their true identity and pretend to be someone they are not. But no matter how they hide their true selves, if something triggers it, it will later show anyway.

“It is difficult to really discover yourself if you keep doing the same actions over and over. Whether you start a new hobby or seek a more varied skill set, trying new activities can unlock aspects of who you are, waiting to be uncovered.”

In this article, Hamilton mentions the common reasons for a person to question who they are, such as a lack of career motivation and time for themselves. It’s sad for someone to feel this way, but it’s also an opportunity to discover themselves and what’s important to them. Hamilton believes that when people try to discover themselves but do not make significant changes in their lives, they will fail.

To ensure that readers can successfully discover themselves, the author suggests leaving their comfort zone and connecting with new people who share the same hobbies and interests. They should also try new activities to discover their interests and gain new skills. Hamilton believes these methods will allow readers to explore and unlock aspects that may be hiding within them.

“Day-to-day priorities are important, certainly. But a life that’s nothing more than a series of going through the same motions usually doesn’t provide much enjoyment.”

Raypole describes self-discovery as examining life, identifying what is missing, and moving toward fulfillment. To achieve its maximum benefits, the author presents nine essential tips for beginners, including visualizing what they want to be and discovering their passions and interests. He also points out the value of learning and trying interesting things, evaluating, and enriching unique abilities.

The author then suggests identifying personal values ​​such as honesty and courage to describe the way of life and behavior one expects from others. Raypole includes questions to ask during self-discovery and the importance of keeping a journal and talking to a professional therapist. She also reminds readers that while the process varies from person to person, patience is a vital virtue that should be cultivated.  

Looking for more? Check out these essays about self .

Prompts for Articles About Discovering Yourself

Although there are many talks about the importance of discovering yourself to be successful, only some understand what it means. This article explains the true meaning of discovering yourself and why it is essential to do so. Use this article to provide tips from experts on how your readers can search for their purpose.

For instance, Erika Martinez , a doctor of Psychology, defines self-discovery yourself as “Cultivating a deep understanding of yourself.” She urges others to find what motivates them in life, including their core values.

Discovering yourself has various benefits, such as dealing with stress effectively, building strong confidence, and improving well-being. To make a compelling article, you should also identify the disadvantages of self-discovery. Ensure that you present the pros and cons with evidence from research or professionals.

For example, when you understand yourself, you are sure of what you want in a partner. However, it can also keep your standards high that you refuse to compromise, making it challenging to reach these standards.

We often see people traveling the world to discover themselves in movies like “My Blueberry Nights” . Create an interesting article by answering the question prompt with support from reliable sources such as research and studies. You can also add your experience if you’ve tried to find yourself by traveling. Tell your readers what the journey taught you and offer tips to readers who may want to do the same.

Like fashion, a person’s choices in art and music say a lot about who they are , as it’s the direct result of their culture and experiences. Discuss in your article why a person’s taste in art and music can be a basis for knowing who they are and how. You can also present a person’s personality traits based on their choices in music and art. For instance, people who love blues, soul, or jazz are highly creative and confident.

How we motivate ourselves plays a critical role in our self-discovery. For example, the quotes that inspire us to speak volumes about our personalities. Make an article with inspiring quotes focusing on how we can learn more about ourselves to incite your readers into action. For help editing your articles, we recommend using the best grammar checker . Our round-up profiles these tools and offers discounts.

Asking ourselves questions about various things is an integral part of self-discovery. To guide your readers on how they can better understand themselves, enumerate questions they should answer during the process. These questions will give them insights into who they are and what they should work on more. Some example questions are: “What makes me special?” and “What scares me the most at the moment?”

Maria Caballero is a freelance writer who has been writing since high school. She believes that to be a writer doesn't only refer to excellent syntax and semantics but also knowing how to weave words together to communicate to any reader effectively.

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Home / Essay Samples / Life / About Myself / Self-Discovery: Understanding and Knowing Yourself Better

Self-Discovery: Understanding and Knowing Yourself Better

• Category: Life
• Topic: About Myself , Being Yourself , Finding Yourself

Pages: 2 (726 words)

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