challenges of being a student mother essay

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Student Mother: Advantages, Struggles and Challenges

• Category Interpersonal Relationship , Education
• Subcategory Family Relationships , Learning
• Topic Mother , Student

Introduction

Education is recognized as an instrument in every student development and female’s individual rights, the attribute of female student reproduction become a hindrance in achieving their full potential in scholastic behavior (Moghadam et al., 2015). It is drawn on social talks related with parenthood and education when taking care of their child and schooling experiences (Este, 2011). This became the prevalent social phenomenon regarding the issue of parenting student.

The reported and possible reasons of early pregnancy which leads to being a student parent are self-reported and unintended pregnancy, age of sexual debut, number of sexual partners, use of contraception at first and last sex, and non-volitional sex (Allen et al., 2018). The issue about sexual involvement at the University of Turkish conducted unprotected sexual intercourse and unplanned pregnancies survey. The result shows that the age of 18 students might experience sexual intercourse. 15.9% had sexual involvement. 36.4% have stated that they utilized contraceptive method in every sexual intercut. The using of condom strategy is 74.0%. 8.6% of student’s experience intentionally pregnancy and 73% of these are engaged in abortion (Erenel & Golbasi, 2011). Some wise, according to (Stoner et al., 2019) pregnancy of student is a cause and consequence of school dropout. School attendance and academic performance must be considering to prevent the current issue regarding early pregnancy of students. However, the consequence of this responsibility is the adjustment of time and fixing of trials. Specifically, in struggles on education (Bautista, et al., 2015).

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Student Mother

Education is essential for everyone. It has been recognized as an important element in our development. Caring for a child is considered a full-time job and may be very stressful on female college students if pregnancy id unplanned. Being a mother is a highly joyous experience that also comes with many responsibilities. Being a mother is very demanding role and being a student a very demanding role. Schooling is critical to a young woman’s life, because the amount of schooling a woman obtains would affect the future aspect of her life (Brown & Amankwaa, 2017; Hofferth et al., 2011). Hence, there were advantages and disadvantages of continuing schooling while at the same time parenting a child (Erwins, Tyler, Mellinger, 2010). Today, early pregnancy and early parenthood is common. In the Philippines, according to Trade Union Congress of the Philippines as of 2012, there are at least 13.9 million Filipino single parents. Due to this, most the time, the education of the mother has to suffer to give way to the coming of the baby down to the guidance of their child. Single parents have the same amount of responsibilities as a dual parent in their families. Single mothers juggle many responsibilities including financial provision, housekeeping, and parenting (Rani, 2012). According to Institute for Women’s Policy Research (2013), educational achievement for single parent mother’s benefits themselves, and their child/children.

Educational attainment of single mothers relates to many aspects of the life of the child (Attewel & Lavin, 2015). Single mothers who are student face pressure academically as well as from their parental responsibilities (Tehan, 2012). Wright (2010) stated that being a parent and a student is challenging as to having financial problems and scheduling their time. Combining motherhood and studying without compromising the activities of either one dilemma for student mothers, her behavior may contrast with her traditional motherhood role (Visick, 2011).

While discourse regarding the “Good mother” in any society is based on the traditional motherhood role (Goodwin & Huppatz, 2010), its definitions vary by society given the different experiences and challenges cause women to abandon one role for the sake of the other (Spring et al., 2012). Academic activities are intertwined with challenging competition. Therefore, motherhood responsibilities impose a large burden on student’s shoulder. The academic community focuses mainly on success, development, and never-ending competition without providing any support. Although a young single mother’s path from poverty to empowerment via education may be filled with hope, she must address critical barriers to that education due to her low-income status (Oldfield, 2011). Despite the many negative outcomes associated with single parenthood, over the years the number of single mother households in American society continues to grow. The dual role of student and mother places a significant barrier in path of single parents as they are faced with challenge of financial exigencies and multiple time commitments while attempting to persist in postsecondary education. This population is dependent upon available and affordable childcare, dependable transportation, access to health care, available advising and academic transition systems, and a multi-layered system of financial aid and support (Branscomb, 2016; Christe, 2012; Darby-Watson, 2011).

Getting support was another factor influencing the simultaneous management of the roles of mother and student. Obviously, finding compatibility between the identities of mother and student can be challenging. Familial support can empower student mothers and reduce the impact of the student role their maternal and family life, especially on the children (Wainwright & Marandet, 2010). Previous studies have also indicated that family and friends are the most common sources of support for student mothers with family responsibilities of support for student mothers with family responsibilities (Xuereb, 2014). According to Lynch (2012) student mothers were involved in a complex identity conflict and constantly managed their behaviours to comply with the images of a good mother and good student; this situation could lead to severe stress (Books, 2013; Lynch, (2010). Zhang (2011) believed that being a good mother created pressure for mothers. http://phennd.org/update/student-parent-success-initiative/

According to (Yang, 2010) student mother are incite in finishing their study, having a perseverance in every challenges that they conquer for their child, and parents who keep on supporting them. They might experience difficulties but indeed, their child is their strength. Achieving the success is the main goal of student mother in behalf of the challenges and negativity of people judgement (Lyonette et al., 2015).

Beyond the hardships played by the student mother, they are motivated to give the family income by supplying their children’s needs and wants (Majid, 2019). They still continued education despite of the discrimination of the society. (Corfe, Kubeka & Van der Riet, 2019).

Struggles and Challenges

Base on the study of Yakaboski (2010) student mother is an underserved group of students who face systematic challenges and hostile environment. Each woman has a distinctive personal history, student, a mom, a wife, and many other hidden roles in their daily lives (Zhang,2011). DuBransky & Tanisha (2014) claims that there is increasing number of students seeking graduate degrees as they operate and raise young children.

Fundamental common challenge among experiences of student mother is a need to manage and maintaining time management in their studies and parenting roles, which result increase stress and pressure for their obligation as a student and at the same time parent (Taukeni, 2014). However, they also feel positive emotions despite of the stress and pressure they may encounter. But, guilt was strong and continuing emotion (Smith, 2019).

Student mother has a trouble in supervising time in taking care on their baby. It resulted missing attention in fulfilling their duty as a parent or vice versa (Bayubay, Manalang & Lionsong, 2015). They had a busy lives with plenty of responsibility for their scholastic obligation and child necessities. However, Education is indicating for student mother as a partially self-fulfillment, it gives unexpected positive side effect of the path to a better job, enough income and benefits for themselves and their child. (Muncie,2013). Nevertheless, if the responsibility of the mother combined with the duty of a student can result a stressful situation (Pement, 2013).

Parent student carry their studies with important life experiences and skill set, unique needs and preferences despite on their dual and overlapping positions (Matta, 2013). The sacrifices they do was never being easy. Balancing academic and familial responsibilities are the big challenges facing by the student mother. If this social responsibility and academic life demand combined it may cause conflict of roles. (Adolfo, 2013) (Holm & Prosek et al., 2015). An interview conducted to ten (10) single mothers resulted to a data that: mothers are motivated by their children, mothers are managers, mothers have to wait, mothers are willing to take university as individuals, and mothers want the universities to look at their children (Lindsay & Gillum, 2018)

In an attempt to combine education, care of children and other social responsibilities, the student mothers at the center may experience a lot of struggle due to interaction and intra-role conflict (Dankyi, J., Dankyi, L., & Minadzi, V., 2019). Graduate student mothers are at high risk of attrition than almost any American college community, owing to the structural design of high education and cultural motherhood stressed that seem to contradict each other (Lester, 2013).

According to Porter (2018) the conversation about gendered organizations to suggest that working mothers are already engaging in the production of hybrid subjectivities in the workplace that have the potential to remake the ideal worker. It was pointed out by Kent (2018) that advocacy issues for policy changes and guidelines for mentoring programs are discussed. And according to Spencer (2018) that within the doctoral student population, there is very little understanding of the experiences of mothers in Ph.D. programs.

Coping Mechanism

According to Offei-Ansah (2012). In the stage of adolescence, student mother play more family role than non-mature and single students. Coping strategies consolidated by the students to manage these family’s role and academic work. Creation of new social limit; delegation of roles; acting in context; prioritizing activities; postponing responsibilities; pre-planning activities; dovetailing family and academic work. The learning support assistants (LSAs) help not just the pupils with special education needs. Also, the teachers and with the student mother is being positively engaged to school (Haycock & Smith, 2011).

Higher vocational education should also be given to struggling student mothers. According to Smith (2019) that even if you are a student mother you should also experience higher vocational education, emotional stability and time management for you to enhance your skills. Student mother should also manage their roles for being a mother and also a student. They should be able to manage their time in studying and also parenting their children. And also they need to experience a Higher Education or HE (Trepal, Stinchfield & Haiyasoso, 2014).

Pement, N. J. M. (2013) pointed out that student mothers need to have an experience of doctoral who pursues doctorates in higher education. On the other hand, some college mothers who do have the support of their families admit that they are feeling guilty for leaving their children with their parents and for not being to be able to see them and interact with them on a daily basis. They also felt guilty if they are not able to provide for them financially and take care of all the necessities that they may need. Also student mothers pursue doctoral in order for the other student mother to be understood not just by themselves but also by the society (Swarts, 2016).

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Being away since 2007, I wasn't even sure if I could return to college. So much self-doubt came over me. I am a 28-year-old mother who has decided to go back to college after 8 years. Can I really go back? Would I know or even remember how to write a paper? Do algebra? When will I study or do homework? I was so nervous but I knew this was the right time. Something inside myself just told me to take my chances and make this happen.

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25 beatles lyrics: your go-to guide for every situation, the best lines from the fab four.

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The End- Abbey Road, 1969

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Dear Prudence- The White Album, 1968

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

Because- Abbey Road, 1969

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

All You Need Is Love, 1967

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

We Can Work It Out- Rubber Soul, 1965

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Come Together- Abbey Road, 1969

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

I Wanna Hold Your Hand- Meet The Beatles!, 1964

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band-1967

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Strawberry Fields Forever- Magical Mystery Tour, 1967

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Rain- Paperback Writer "B" side, 1966

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

Here Comes The Sun- Abbey Road, 1969

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

Saw Her Standing There- Please Please Me, 1963

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

Michelle- Rubber Soul, 1965

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

Revolution- The Beatles, 1968

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Eleanor Rigby- Revolver, 1966

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

With A Little Help From My Friends- Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, 1967

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Hey Jude, 1968

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

Yesterday- Help!, 1965

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

Let It Be- Let It Be, 1970

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all i got to give if you say you'll love me too. i may not have a lot to give but what i got i'll give to you. i don't care too much for money. money can't buy me love.

Can't Buy Me Love- A Hard Day's Night, 1964

All you need is love, love is all you need

All You Need Is Love- Magical Mystery Tour, 1967

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, take these broken wings and learn to fly. all your life, you were only waiting for this moment to arise.

Blackbird- The White Album, 1968

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

In My Life- Rubber Soul, 1965

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14 Invisible Activities: Unleash Your Inner Ghost!

Obviously the best superpower..

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

1. "Haunt" your friends.

Follow them into their house and cause a ruckus.

2. Sneak into movie theaters.

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3. Sneak into the pantry and grab a snack without judgment.

Late night snacks all you want? Duh.

4. Reenact "Hollow Man" and play Kevin Bacon.

America's favorite son? And feel what it's like to be in a MTV Movie Award nominated film? Sign me up.

5. Wear a mask and pretend to be a floating head.

Just another way to spook your friends in case you wanted to.

6. Hold objects so they'll "float."

"Oh no! A floating jar of peanut butter."

7. Win every game of hide-and-seek.

Just stand out in the open and you'll win.

8. Eat some food as people will watch it disappear.

Even everyday activities can be funny.

9. Go around pantsing your friends.

Even pranks can be done; not everything can be good.

10. Not have perfect attendance.

You'll say here, but they won't see you...

11. Avoid anyone you don't want to see.

Whether it's an ex or someone you hate, just use your invisibility to slip out of the situation.

12. Avoid responsibilities.

Chores? Invisible. People asking about social life? Invisible. Family being rude? Boom, invisible.

13. Be an expert on ding-dong-ditch.

Never get caught and have the adrenaline rush? I'm down.

14. Brag about being invisible.

Be the envy of the town.

But don't, I repeat, don't go in a locker room. Don't be a pervert with your power. No one likes a Peeping Tom.

Good luck, folks.

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned..

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

1. The importance of traditions.

Sometimes traditions seem like a silly thing, but the fact of it is that it's part of who you are. You grew up this way and, more than likely, so did your parents. It is something that is part of your family history and that is more important than anything.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

No matter how many times they get on your nerves or make you mad, they are the ones who will always be there and you should never take that for granted.

3. How to give back.

When tragedy strikes in a small town, everyone feels obligated to help out because, whether directly or indirectly, it affects you too. It is easy in a bigger city to be able to disconnect from certain problems. But in a small town those problems affect everyone.

4. What the word "community" really means.

Along the same lines as #3, everyone is always ready and willing to lend a helping hand when you need one in a small town and to me that is the true meaning of community. It's working together to build a better atmosphere, being there to raise each other up, build each other up, and pick each other up when someone is in need. A small town community is full of endless support whether it be after a tragedy or at a hometown sports game. Everyone shows up to show their support.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

People say this to others all the time, but it takes on a whole new meaning in a small town. It is true that life is about the journey, but when you're from a small town, you know it's about the journey because the journey probably takes longer than you spend at the destination. Everything is so far away that it is totally normal to spend a couple hours in the car on your way to some form of entertainment. And most of the time, you're gonna have as many, if not more, memories and laughs on the journey than at the destination.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

Word travels fast in a small town, so don't think you're gonna get away with anything. In fact, your parents probably know what you did before you even have a chance to get home and tell them. And forget about being scared of what your teacher, principle, or other authority figure is going to do, you're more afraid of what your parents are gonna do when you get home.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

Everyone deserves a chance. Most people don't have ill-intentions and you can't live your life guarding against every one else just because a few people in your life have betrayed your trust.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

While small towns are not always extremely diverse, they do contain people with a lot of different stories, struggle, and backgrounds. In a small town, it is pretty hard to exclude anyone because of who they are or what they come from because there aren't many people to choose from. A small town teaches you that just because someone isn't the same as you, doesn't mean you can't be great friends.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

In a small town, you learn that it's okay to be who you are and do your own thing. You learn that confidence isn't how beautiful you are or how much money you have, it's who you are on the inside.

10. How to work for what I want.

Nothing comes easy in life. They always say "gardens don't grow overnight" and if you're from a small town you know this both figuratively and literally. You certainly know gardens don't grow overnight because you've worked in a garden or two. But you also know that to get to the place you want to be in life it takes work and effort. It doesn't just happen because you want it to.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

If you're from a small town, you know that you will probably only meet a handful of people in your life who ACTUALLY know where your town is. And forget about the people who accidentally enter into your town because of google maps. You've gotten really good at giving them directions right back to the interstate.

12. How to be humble.

My small town has definitely taught me how to be humble. It isn't always about you, and anyone who grows up in a small town knows that. Everyone gets their moment in the spotlight, and since there's so few of us, we're probably best friends with everyone so we are as excited when they get their moment of fame as we are when we get ours.

13. To be well-rounded.

Going to a small town high school definitely made me well-rounded. There isn't enough kids in the school to fill up all the clubs and sports teams individually so be ready to be a part of them all.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

In a small town, good luck holding a grudge. In a bigger city you can just avoid a person you don't like or who you've had problems with. But not in a small town. You better resolve the issue fast because you're bound to see them at least 5 times a week.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

One of my favorite things about growing up in a rural area was being able to go outside and go exploring and not have to worry about being in danger. There is nothing more exciting then finding a new place somewhere in town or in the woods and just spending time there enjoying the natural beauty around you.

16. To be prepared for anything.

You never know what may happen. If you get a flat tire, you better know how to change it yourself because you never know if you will be able to get ahold of someone else to come fix it. Mechanics might be too busy , or more than likely you won't even have enough cell service to call one.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

It's okay to ask for help. One thing I realized when I moved away from my town for college, was how much my town has taught me that I could ask for help is I needed it. I got into a couple situations outside of my town where I couldn't find anyone to help me and found myself thinking, if I was in my town there would be tons of people ready to help me. And even though I couldn't find anyone to help, you better believe I wasn't afraid to ask.

18. How to be creative.

When you're at least an hour away from normal forms of entertainment such as movie theaters and malls, you learn to get real creative in entertaining yourself. Whether it be a night looking at the stars in the bed of a pickup truck or having a movie marathon in a blanket fort at home, you know how to make your own good time.

19. To brush off gossip.

It's all about knowing the person you are and not letting others influence your opinion of yourself. In small towns, there is plenty of gossip. But as long as you know who you really are, it will always blow over.

Grateful Beyond Words: A Letter to My Inspiration

I have never been so thankful to know you..

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

You have taught me that you don't always have to strong. You are allowed to break down as long as you pick yourself back up and keep moving forward. When life had you at your worst moments, you allowed your friends to be there for you and to help you. You let them in and they helped pick you up. Even in your darkest hour you showed so much strength. I know that you don't believe in yourself as much as you should but you are unbelievably strong and capable of anything you set your mind to.

Your passion to make a difference in the world is unbelievable. You put your heart and soul into your endeavors and surpass any personal goal you could have set. Watching you do what you love and watching you make a difference in the lives of others is an incredible experience. The way your face lights up when you finally realize what you have accomplished is breathtaking and I hope that one day I can have just as much passion you have.

SEE MORE: A Letter To My Best Friend On Her Birthday

The love you have for your family is outstanding. Watching you interact with loved ones just makes me smile . You are so comfortable and you are yourself. I see the way you smile when you are around family and I wish I could see you smile like this everyday. You love with all your heart and this quality is something I wished I possessed.

You inspire me to be the best version of myself. I look up to you. I feel that more people should strive to have the strength and passion that you exemplify in everyday life.You may be stubborn at points but when you really need help you let others in, which shows strength in itself. I have never been more proud to know someone and to call someone my role model. You have taught me so many things and I want to thank you. Thank you for inspiring me in life. Thank you for making me want to be a better person.

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life..

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Don't freak out

This is a rule you should continue to follow no matter what you do in life, but is especially helpful in this situation.

Email the professor

Around this time, professors are getting flooded with requests from students wanting to get into full classes. This doesn't mean you shouldn't burden them with your email; it means they are expecting interested students to email them. Send a short, concise message telling them that you are interested in the class and ask if there would be any chance for you to get in.

Attend the first class

Often, the advice professors will give you when they reply to your email is to attend the first class. The first class isn't the most important class in terms of what will be taught. However, attending the first class means you are serious about taking the course and aren't going to give up on it.

Keep attending class

Every student is in the same position as you are. They registered for more classes than they want to take and are "shopping." For the first couple of weeks, you can drop or add classes as you please, which means that classes that were once full will have spaces. If you keep attending class and keep up with assignments, odds are that you will have priority. Professors give preference to people who need the class for a major and then from higher to lower class year (senior to freshman).

Have a backup plan

For two weeks, or until I find out whether I get into my waitlisted class, I will be attending more than the usual number of classes. This is so that if I don't get into my waitlisted class, I won't have a credit shortage and I won't have to fall back in my backup class. Chances are that enough people will drop the class, especially if it is very difficult like computer science, and you will have a chance. In popular classes like art and psychology, odds are you probably won't get in, so prepare for that.

Remember that everything works out at the end

Life is full of surprises. So what if you didn't get into the class you wanted? Your life obviously has something else in store for you. It's your job to make sure you make the best out of what you have.

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Strength and perseverance: Living as a student mother

• Post author By Maxine Ferrer , Celestine Sevilla
• Post date February 15, 2019
• No Comments on Strength and perseverance: Living as a student mother

Outside the four walls of the classroom, a bell rings—class dismissed. Time for students to go home and see about their school assignments and extra-curricular work. Some may be worried about which essay to write first, or which math problem to solve for later; others may be fretting over what to prepare for the family dinner, or how many dishes and pans they have to wash afterwards; for student mothers, it is all of the above, and more.

A balancing act

While being a student may already entail a lot of sleepless nights, student mothers also face an entirely different challenge of having to balance both their studies and being a parent. As a student mother herself, Ehlie Roxas (II, AB-CAM) says, “Among the most challenging would be scheduling, getting work or assignments done at home while simultaneously taking care of my daughter and recovering from my pregnancy.” Having to constantly switch between being a student and a young mother is no easy feat, as Tina Lim (IV, BS-ADV) explains, “Last term, my mom got dengue, and no one was there to take care of my daughter.” She had to miss two weeks of school to take care of her.

Balancing parenthood and preparing for their careers make student mothers seriously rethink their plans for the future. And no matter what generation, women have had to deal with society’s judgment and they have made the best out of their situation. Anne Ferrer (OCM-MKT, ‘95) was in the midst of doing her undergraduate thesis for Organizational Communication when she found out she was pregnant with her first daughter. At first, the discovery made her feel like she needed to rush through the rest of her student life. “But as life went on, I realized I had to enjoy the moment while my child is growing up with me. Kailangan ko maging maayos, [magkaroon ng ] direksyon so that I will be a suitable adult for my daughter to be with,” she confessed.

(I need to be a decent person, someone who has direction.)

Uncalled-for criticism

With an already tremendous weight on their shoulders, these young mothers also have to deal with the judgment and unavoidable prejudice from others. More often than not, they have been crucified for having a child at such a young age—they are not strangers to comments like “ sayang yung pagkabata ” (waste of youth) and “ ayan kasi hindi ginamit yung utak ” (look what happened because she didn’t use her head).

It is all the more heartbreaking when comments such as the ones aforementioned are spoken by those who were supposed to be the most understanding. Ehlie recounted when she informed her parents of her pregnancy, “My own parents—my mother in particular, heaped all the curses a religious woman could heap on my head: sinner, disgusting, whore, traitor, disgrace, disappointment. [She said] that I would end up [as] nothing.” When her own flesh and blood turned her away, Ehlie sought comfort from her friends, her partner, and his family, citing that they were the support group she never had. Tina had a more fortunate experience with her parents, although she admits that she encountered judgment from strangers.

“At first, I really let it get to me. I got really sad because it made me feel like my life was over,” she shares.

Anne’s experience during her time in college did not differ much from Tina’s. More often than not, the comments would come from students who had limited knowledge about the situation but were still quick to judge. Looking back, she narrated, “The other students would talk about you and make assumptions about your personality.” Luckily, her close friends were there to provide support while she was studying—even going the extra mile by strategically arranging their schedules to ensure that someone was always free to help her.

Factoring in university life

In preparation for their transition into motherhood, Ehlie and Tina had to file for a leave of absence (LOA) from the University. Both women found themselves thankful for the due consideration given by the University since Ehlie was able to retain her scholarship and Tina was given a full refund for the classes she dropped.

Although the University has already taken steps to support students like Ehlie and Tina, there is still room for possible improvement. “While little can be done to erase society’s stigma, I believe that what student-parents need the most is a secure support group. [They could also consider] possibly opening an option to bring children on campus and into class with the agreement and approval of the professors,” Ehlie suggests. Tina echoes these sentiments as she thought back to a term when her classes lasted from early in the morning until late at night, causing her to miss spending significant time with her daughter. Still, they acknowledged that there are other factors to consider before a policy like that could be formalized, such as the comfort of their peers and classmates.

Even so, Ehlie and Tina are still doing their best to strike a balance between studies and motherhood. “I don’t think I got it yet, but I’m getting there,” shares Tina truthfully. With young daughters to look after, both women have admitted to having their goals and outlook in life drastically change, which has actually helped them to try and find better footing in the world. “My previously unstable, unsure plan for the future has surprisingly stabilized, as I contemplated what would work out best for what I realistically wanted to achieve,” Ehlie explains.

Strong, not ‘ sayang ’

Going through the motions, the young mothers had also unconsciously embarked on a path of self-discovery, realizing their inner strength and believing in their capability to overcome virtually anything and everything. With that in mind, Tina goes on to say that, “Personally, I don’t think we’re ‘ sayang ’, because our lives didn’t stop the moment we had children.” Anne can attest to the statement, “At least at one point in my life, I was brave enough to take on a big responsibility by myself. I made the best decision to allow the life in me to live.”

Young or not, students or not; these women are mothers all the same. It does not matter how old they are or what professions they are in, because the love they have for their children transcends everything else.

They should be praised for their dedication to themselves by continuing with their studies and career, and raising their children.

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The Challenges of Parenting While in College

New research links support and health for undergraduate student parents..

Posted June 30, 2018

• A Parent's Role
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College is challenging. Parenting is challenging. Those who succeed at doing both at the same time tend to have help from strong family and friend support networks. Research now available highlights the role of social support and stress in the physical health of college students who are also parents.

Nearly 5 million undergraduate students are also parents in the United States. Of those student parents, only 26 percent earn their degree within six years. Many of the others leave university for lower paying jobs. Some reasons for leaving college early include not having a strong enough support system including friends and family that can pitch in and help when the student parent needs to stay late on campus or when a child is sick. Others cannot overcome the financial burden of paying for college while raising a child. Many student parents work extra jobs when they are not in class to make ends meet. Many suffer from significant stress that is compounded by juggling two major life transitions at once: becoming a college student and becoming a new parent.

Drs. Eve Gerrard and Ron Roberts found that some student parents question why they are putting themselves and their families through this stress and whether a college degree is really worth it. Since being a student parent often means not doing either role to the best of their abilities, some student parents wonder whether the sacrifices they are making to their education and their children will pay off in the end.

As communication scientists, we recognize the importance of a strong social support network in handling and overcoming challenges in any life stage, but especially when attending college while raising young children. Social network members like family, friends, and others who care can offer instrumental support like parenting advice or study tips. They can also offer tangible support like tuition money or a place to stay. When people receive enough good support, they are better off physically, mentally, and socially.

In a recent study from the Family Communication and Relationships Lab published in Health Communication , my colleague, Dr. Kristina Scharp, and I set out to discover how the costs of seeking support influence the health of undergraduate student parents . Costs of seeking support can be both intrapersonal and interpersonal and occur when people feel stigmatized or distressed about asking for help. It is easy to imagine a new parent who wants to appear confident and like they have they have everything under control may not want to ask for help. Having to ask for help may be intrapersonally costly if it lowers the person’s self-esteem or makes them worry about their ability to solve problems. Interpersonal support costs happen when the person thinks they will looks weak or incompetent to others, or they worry about how others will react to their request for help. For example, if new parents believe they should be able to handle the stress of a new baby and should naturally know how to be “good parents,” they may fear that others will look down on them for needing help. We found that the higher the costs student parents reported they felt, the worse their physical health. Student parents who perceived high costs to seeking support had more headaches, slept less, and exercised less than parents who reported lower costs.

Second, we wanted to understand how the amount of support a student parent desired influenced his/her physical health. People differ in how much support they want from their networks. Here we examined a type of support that relies on communication: social presence support. Social presence support captures the amount of support a person believes they have available to them. When a sibling tells a new parent “I am here for you if you need anything,” they are providing social presence support. Social presence support is about knowing support is available if needed, not about how much is actually given. Social presence was not directly associated with poor physical health in our study, but it was linked to parenting stress suggesting that desiring more social presence support than a student parent is getting contributes to higher parenting stress.

Finally, we tested whether college-based stress and parenting-based stress negatively influenced the physical health of student parents. Like we expected, the student parents in our study who experienced high levels of parenting and academic stress had worse health outcomes. For example, these parents were sleeping and exercising less than their peers who did not experience such high stress.

The major takeaway from our study is that friends and family can make a significant difference in the lives of college students who are also parents . Student parents who feel supported and are not afraid to ask for help are less stressed and in better physical health. Friends and family can remind student parents often that they are there for them and that it is normal to not have everything under control and figured out all the time. Friends and family can explicitly say that the student parent is not expected to be a perfect parent or raise his/her children on her/his own. As the saying goes, it takes a village . This is especially true when raising a child and earning a college degree.

Scharp, K. M. & Dorrance Hall, E. (online first). Examining the relationship between undergraduate student parent social support seeking factors, stress, and somatic symptoms: A two-model comparison of direct and indirect effects. Health Communication. doi: 10.1080/10410236.2017.1384427

Gault, B., Reichlin, L., Reynolds, E., & Froehner, M. (2014). 4.8 million college students are raising children. Institute for Women’s Policy Research Fact Sheet, #C424, 1–2.

Gerrard, E., & Roberts, R. (2006). Student parents, hardship and debt: A qualitative study. Journal of Further and Higher Education, 30, 393–403. doi:10.1080/03098770600965409

Sarason, I. G., & Sarason, B. R. (2009). Social support: Mapping the construct. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 26, 113–120. doi:10.1177/0265407509105526

Uchino, B. N. (2009). Understanding the links between social support and physical health: A life-span perspective with emphasis on the separability of perceived and received support. Perspectives on Psychological Science, 4, 236–255. doi:10.1111/j.1745-6924.2009.011

Elizabeth Dorrance Hall, Ph.D. , is an Assistant Professor of Communication, Michigan State University and Director, Family Communication and Relationships Lab.

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Home > Journals > FAMILYPERSPECTIVES > Vol. 1 (2020) > Iss. 2

Family Perspectives

Article title, navigating the challenges of being a student mom.

Pamela Love , Brigham Young University Follow

Recommended Citation

Love, Pamela (2020) "Navigating the Challenges of Being a Student Mom," Family Perspectives : Vol. 1: Iss. 2, Article 7. Available at: https://scholarsarchive.byu.edu/familyperspectives/vol1/iss2/7

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Challenges and Coping Strategies of Student Mothers in a State University: a Phenomenological study

• Kaye Barrot

INTRODUCTIONCollege education is expected to be much harder (Ries, 2016). Student mothers pursue college education because they want to provide for their child (Wilsey, 2013). However, past researchers looked into the time management and stress of student mothers. This study described the experiences of student mothers in terms of challenges and coping strategies. The study was conducted to contribute to the growing literature of this phenomenon situated in a premier higher institution.METHODSThe study utilized qualitative, phenomenological design. Bracketing was done to finalize the questions in order to avoid bias perception of the phenomenon. Snow ball sampling technique was used in searching for student mothers who willingly participated in the study. Data were gathered through an in-depth interview among the eight student mothers who were currently enrolled in a state university. Interviews were transcribed. For validity, the interview transcripts checked and finalized by the participants. Coding was used and significant answers were thematically analyzed.RESULTSStudent mothers experienced challenges such as (1) conflicting emotions gained through performing their dual roles; (2) they were obliged to have part-time works due to lack of financial support and (3) they suffer from lack of time management. Furthermore, they repented for sacrificing the role of being a mother and a student at the same time. Student mothers in their personal experiences revealed that as a coping strategy they need to cope with the conflicting emotion to sustain their roles. They also used to make a wise decision making by managing their time correctly and having positive perspective in life in molding their future with their child that serves as their motivation to deal with their current situation. Researchers found out that student mothers experienced challenges such as conflicting emotions, lack of financial support, and lack of time. Also, as their coping strategies they to cope with their conflicting emotions, wise decision making, and having positive perspective in life to finish college education.

DISCUSSIONS

Becoming a student mother is characterized by the presence of contradicting emotions, the need of both internal resources to face the situation and to identify oneself in the role. Results showed that they experienced a range of difficulties. The presence of wise time management is a big factor for student mothers to successfully perform their role as a student and a mother.

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Educational Challenges of Teenage Student-Mothers in Don Honorio Ventura State University

Brown and Amankwaa (2007) explained that the beginning of engaging in sexual relationships increases the probability of pregnancy among female college students. As this happens, only women take all the consequences and challenges of contraception and even child care. In most cases, teenage mothers were not capable of returning to school after giving birth to a child (Macleod and Durrheim, 2003). But as of the moment, other universities and colleges were doing ―return to school arrangements‖ where pregnant students were in the meantime prohibited to attend school until the child was born (Okeyo, 2011). The researchers aim to explore and describe the educational challenges experienced by teenage studentmothers in Don Honorio Ventura State University and to design recommendations which can help these students to cope with these challenges. The participants of the study were 5 DHVSU teenage student-mothers who were selected through purposive-convenience sampling. They participated in in...

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