If I Could Change One Thing About Myself

Perhaps, one of the most unpleasant feelings one can experience in life is being discontent with oneself. Whereas we are prone to notice negative features in other people, we rarely turn our eyes on ourselves to critically evaluate our behavior or personal qualities.

It seems that we always find a reason why we cannot or should not change something about ourselves. In this essay, I would like to challenge this way of thinking and argue that if given a chance, there is always something that we would want to change about ourselves.

The first reason why it is worth changing something about ourselves is that it Doubt and skepticism can be very useful, motivating us to look for evidence and to think about our beliefs more critically.

second reason is that we are never perfect, and there is always room for improvement. No matter how successful or happy we might be, there is always something that we could do better.

The third reason is that change is inevitable and, if we do not change ourselves, life will do it for us. So, if we want to be in control of our lives, it is better to change ourselves on our own terms.

If we do so, though, we may discover several characteristics within ourselves that we would prefer to be different. I endeavor to be tolerant of the majority of my personality traits. I can be a slothful, irresponsible, or apathetic downer in addition to being a positive presence. These and other drawbacks have taught me how to live with them; nevertheless, my propensity to doubt my judgments is one that I’d want gone.

Doubt can be a healthy quality in some situations. If we Doubt our ability to do something, it might give us the extra push to actually achieve it. But more often than not, Doubt just leads to inaction and indecision. I would love to be able to make up my mind about things more quickly and definitively.

Part of the reason I Doubt so much is because I am a Skeptical person by nature. I tend to question everything and overthink every situation. This has its advantages, but it definitely doesn’t help with making quick decisions! If I could change one thing about myself, it would be to learn to trust my gut a bit more and go with my gut instinct instead of Doubting everything all the time.

We all have our doubts from time to time. Imagine the scenario in which the five greatest institutions in the United States are willing to accept you as a student. This is one opportunity out of a million, and you know how important it is for you to make this choice. You’re not likely to point your finger at one of them and say , “I’ll go there.”

You will probably have some doubts about whether you are good enough for this school or maybe another one would be a better fit for you.

The same goes for our everyday lives. We constantly doubt ourselves, our abilities, and our choices. And while a healthy dose of skepticism is essential to prevent us from making impulsive decisions, too much Doubt can hold us back from achieving our full potential.

If I could change one thing about myself, it would be to Doubt less and believe in myself more. Skepticism is important, but Doubt has a way of creeping in and taking over when we least expect it. If I Doubted less, I would be able to take more risks and truly see what I am capable of.

You will instead engage in significant study, determining the benefits and drawbacks of each university’s education; you will sketch out your professional future prospects as a graduate of each institution, and examine a variety of other criteria. And after many concerns and worries, you’ll finally choose your favorite school.

The very first step on your way to college is choosing the right place to study. It seems like an easy task at first glance. You just go online, type in “universities in the United States”, and voila – you have a list of hundreds of institutions to apply to. But then you start learning more about each of these universities, and you realize that it is not going to be that simple after all. Every university has its own unique atmosphere, advantages, and disadvantages. And it is up to you to decide which one suits you best.

When I was making my own choice of university, I had Doubt and Skepticism as my two closest companions. I was constantly wondering if I was making the right decision, and doubting whether I would be able to find my place in a new environment. But in the end, I made my choice and it turned out to be one of the best decisions of my life.

If I could change one thing about myself, I would Doubt and Skepticism go away. They were not very helpful when it came to choosing a university, and they are not very helpful in general. Doubt and Skepticism tend to hold me back from trying new things and taking risks. And while there is nothing wrong with being cautious, Doubt and Skepticism take it to the extreme.

So if I could change one thing about myself, I would get rid of Doubt and Skepticism. They are not worth the worry and stress that they cause me. And life is too short to waste time on Doubt and Skepticism.

In conclusion, I believe that there is always something that we could change about ourselves if given a chance. Doubt and skepticism can be useful, we are never perfect and change is inevitable. Therefore, instead of being afraid of change, we should embrace it as an opportunity to grow and become better versions of ourselves.

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It is human nature to doubt ourselves from time to time. Imagine the situation when the five best universities in the United States are willing to have you as their student. This is one chance in a million, and you know this decision could define your entire life. Most likely, you will not randomly point your finger at one of them and say: “I will study here” (well, not immediately, at least). Instead you will conduct serious research, figuring out the advantages and drawbacks of being a student of each particular university; you will sketch out your future career perspectives as a graduate of each of these universities, and check a number of other parameters. And after intense doubts and worries, you would choose your favored institution.

This is the most reasonable approach. But in my case, I am sometimes prone to doubt even after I made a decision. Most likely, I would choose a university carefully, make a final decision, and then doubt the decision for a while, even though I would be already studying there. In real life, such a peculiarity manifests in more everyday situations. To stay at home or to hang out with friends? Whatever I choose, I will spend some time thinking about the opposite variant. To buy chocolate milk or beer? To go to the cinema or to the theater? To spend vacations in the mountains or at the sea? Not always, but more often that I would like, I start to reflect about trivial decisions.

Would I like to completely quit doubting? I think not. Doubts are a natural mechanism that helps us make the best possible decision in each particular case; without this ability, we would most likely make random, uninformed decisions regardless of their possible consequences. But at the same time, when the decision is made, you must start working to actualize it without hesitation, and this is the moment when doubts become troublesome. The more you think over a certain action of yours, the more likely you will delay the realization of what is on your mind.

Wise people teach us to be tolerant towards themselves, and accept both their negative and positive traits. I agree with this thesis, but with one small specification: this acceptance must not be an excuse for not working towards personal development and growth. This is my approach towards my proneness to doubtfulness: I can live with it, I know it is mine, but I am persistently working on getting rid of this quality.

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Home — Essay Samples — Life — Habits — The Behaviors I Want to Change in My Life

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A Habit I Would Like to Change: Insufficient Time Management

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Published: Aug 16, 2019

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Things I would like to change about myself (essay)

Works cited.

  • Oaten, M., & Cheng, K. (2006). Improved self-control: The benefits of a regular program of academic study. Basic and Applied Social Psychology, 28(1), 1-16. doi: 10.1207/s15324834basp2801_1
  • Sirois, F. M., & Pychyl, T. A. (2013). Procrastination and the priority of short-term mood regulation: Consequences for future self. Social and Personality Psychology Compass, 7(2), 115-127. doi: 10.1111/spc3.12011
  • Eisenberg, D. M., Kaptchuk, T. J., Post, D. E., Hrbek, A. L., O'Connor, B. B., Osypiuk, K., ... & Buring, J. E. (2010). Establishing an integrative medicine program within an academic health center: Essential considerations. Academic Medicine, 85(3), 338-343. doi: 10.1097/ACM.0b013e3181ccc24a
  • Bandura, A. (1991). Social cognitive theory of self-regulation. Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, 50(2), 248-287. doi: 10.1016/0749-5978(91)90022-L
  • Gollwitzer, P. M., & Sheeran, P. (2006). Implementation intentions and goal achievement: A meta‐analysis of effects and processes. Advances in Experimental Social Psychology, 38, 69-119. doi: 10.1016/S0065-2601(06)38002-1
  • Baumeister, R. F., Gailliot, M., DeWall, C. N., & Oaten, M. (2006). Self-regulation and personality: How interventions increase regulatory success, and how depletion moderates the effects of traits on behavior. Journal of Personality, 74(6), 1773-1801. doi: 10.1111/j.1467-6494.2006.00428.x
  • Duckworth, A. L., & Seligman, M. E. P. (2005). Self-discipline outdoes IQ in predicting academic performance of adolescents. Psychological Science, 16(12), 939-944. doi: 10.1111/j.1467-9280.2005.01641.x
  • Tice, D. M., Baumeister, R. F., Shmueli, D., & Muraven, M. (2007). Restoring the self: Positive affect helps improve self-regulation following ego depletion. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 43(3), 379-384. doi: 10.1016/j.jesp.2006.05.007
  • Hagger, M. S., Wood, C., Stiff, C., & Chatzisarantis, N. L. D. (2010). Ego depletion and the strength model of self-control: A meta-analysis. Psychological Bulletin, 136(4), 495-525. doi: 10.1037/a0019486

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essay on one thing you want to change about yourself

A Conscious Rethink

14 things you can change about yourself to grow as a person

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woman wearing yellow sunglasses

There are things about yourself that you wish you could change, and there are parts of your life that you’d like to be better.

You see other people living what you feel are fabulous lives and think you could do the same if only you were different. 

But you don’t make any effort to change.

You’ve tried many times in the past only to fail, over and over again.

And you’re tired of trying and failing.

But consider this: are you attempting to change in the right ways? Do you know which things to change about yourself to get the desired results?

As you contemplate how be a better version of yourself, below are fourteen things you may wish to consider working on.

These points will help you achieve the lasting change that has eluded you in the past. They’ll give you a better chance of being successful at reaching your goal of personal development and growth. 

Consult a life coach to help you figure out what to change about yourself and your life, and how. Use the quick and simple form on Bark.com to have qualified life coaches email you to discuss their coaching services and provide quotes.

14 Things To Change About Yourself

1. your values..

Do you know what your values are?

It’s ok if you don’t.

Many people don’t give much thought to their values. We just kind of trudge along and go with the crowd. We rarely consider what we value or hold as important.

This pushes many people to live lives that are superficial and incompatible with who they truly are inside. They fill their houses with stuff, closets with clothes, and garages with cars they don’t need. 

If you’ve realized that your life is full of  stuff  that doesn’t bring you happiness or fulfillment, you either need to change your values or change your life to match your values. 

Spend some time in quiet reflection and think about what you value. People around you may value money and success, but maybe your values lie in giving back to the community.

Your values don’t have to be the same as everybody else’s. There is nothing wrong with valuing things that differ from what society emphasizes. You only have one life to live, so embrace your differences and stay true to yourself .

Once you can identify your values or the values you would like to have, look for ways to change your life to align with those values.  

2. Your priorities.

This might be a bit tricky. We generally have an idea of the things or people we  should  prioritize. But in reality, the things or people we  do  prioritize are vastly different. 

For example, we know we should prioritize our children. But… when our office calls, we quickly scramble to pick up even if we’re in the middle of a conversation with our kids.

We may claim to prioritize being debt-free, but our go-to payment option is our credit card.

Examine your life and be brutally honest with yourself. What do you prioritize? Who do you put first in your life? Does the what/who that you prioritize align with your values?

If not, it‘s time for a major adjustment in your priorities. 

3. Your mindset.

Do you have a positive or a negative mindset?

Is the glass half empty or half full?

Do you expect good things to happen to you or are you just waiting for the other shoe to drop?

Is there even a point in trying to change your life for the better if your mindset is negative? You probably don’t think you can do it. If you don’t believe any good will come from it, then why go to all this trouble?

Certainly, if there’s to be any hope of changing your life for the long haul, one of the first things you need to tackle is your mindset. Because, if you are already defeated in your mind, your actions and behavior will soon follow.  

You must believe in yourself and change your way of thinking . That’s the only way you can have any type of success in life.

You must trust that you have the skills and ability to do what you desire. If you do not, there’s no habit, pill, or magic available that can overcome what you think you can or can’t do. 

4. Your self-talk.

Your mindset and self-talk go hand-in-hand. You can’t have a positive mindset and talk to yourself poorly.

On the flip side, repeating positive mantras every day will accomplish little if you don’t believe what you’re saying. 

Change the way you talk to yourself. Talk to yourself the way you would talk to a friend or a small child who needs understanding and compassion. 

Let’s say you made a huge mistake at work. Instead of beating yourself up about it and telling yourself how stupid you are, calm down and tell yourself you did your best. Wish yourself better luck next time or look for ways to improve your output so you’ll be more prepared in the future.

If you dropped the ball, however, look over the situation and figure out where you erred and how. Learn from your mistake and come up with a plan to avoid a similar error in the future. 

Change your self-talk to match your new mindset. When you’re in the right frame of mind, there’s not much you can’t accomplish.

5. Your health.

Your physical health has as big an impact on your mental health and mindset as your mental health and mindset have on your physical health. When you are healthy, it’s easier to maintain a positive mindset.

If you don’t feel good, being positive will be so much harder. You need to get your health in order because there’s no mind trick, positive thoughts, or goal setting that can overcome the physical limitations brought on by your poor health. 

Visit your doctor for a comprehensive medical checkup to make sure no vitamin deficiency is causing you to feel unusually tired or depressed. Under the advice of your doctor, clean up your diet and incorporate exercise into your routine. 

You’d be surprised how changes to your diet and exercise regimen can improve not just your overall health, but also make you feel more empowered and happy.

6. Your sense of adventure.

Did you ever play make-believe when you were young? Were you the type of child that would fight epic battles on the playground? Did you ever daydream about visiting the far-off lands you spent hours reading about in books or watching in cartoons?

What happened to your sense of adventure?

Now, as adults, many of us have lost our desire to try new things or go to new places. In place of our childlike sense of adventure, we have responsibilities and a fear of the unknown or of looking stupid. 

Think back to those days when the only toy you needed was your imagination. You and your friends (sometimes even they weren’t real) would happily play outside for hours. 

If you feel that since then, life has become less fun…

Get out of your comfort zone. 

Get your sense of adventure back. At least as an adult, you can actually try out the things you dream about without having to get permission from your parents.  

7. Your support group.

The truth is, changing your life could mean changing your friends or intimate partner.

If your relationship is toxic, there’s a limit to how good you can feel about yourself or your life. A toxic relationship, whether platonic or romantic, professional or personal, will always bleed into other areas of your life because it affects you psychologically, emotionally, and sometimes physically.

Toxic relationships aren’t even worth trying to manage. Doing so will hold you back from making a lasting change in your life.

Because, as toxic people are so fond of doing, they will actively hold you back through criticism or by discouraging you from taking steps to do and be better.

Unless the parties involved are interested in changing for the betterment of the relationship, managing it is futile and perhaps damaging to your self-esteem. 

Often, it‘s better to go no or low contact. 

Let them see the effect of the changes you are making in your life from afar. 

We really do recommend that you search for a life coach through Bark.com as coaching can be highly effective in helping you to grow and develop in the ways you wish to.

8. Your work ethic.

If you’re going to be brutally honest with yourself, would you say your work ethic is where it should be? If you were your boss, would you like an employee like you? Or are you busy half-assing your work, hoping that you’re doing enough to get by?

Let’s say you have your own business. Can your business be successful with the current level of your work ethic? If not, it’s time to change. 

Having a good work ethic is about putting in hard work and giving your best, regardless of your boss, company, or mood. It’s about being productive, dependable, dedicated, and working well with your team to produce the best results you can.

While you may want to believe you’d work harder if you were working for yourself or had another job or a different boss, the truth is, your past performance is a good predictor of your future success. This means if you’re a mediocre employee right now, chances are you’ll be a mediocre employee at your dream job, with a different boss, or when you’re your own boss. 

You need to develop your work ethic now in your current situation.

It may be tempting to blame others and extenuating circumstances for your lack of quality output. However, the choice to do your best or the bare minimum is really up to you. Developing a good work ethic is one of those skills that will come in handy, whether you’re working for yourself or someone else. 

A good work ethic will help you produce high-quality work on time and will keep you focused on your goals, whatever they may be. Having a good work ethic is the one skill that takes your dreams from the future to the present.  

9. Your career.

How often do you wake up in the morning dreading going to work? Instead of resting on Sundays, do you spend the day cranky because work starts in the morning? Are you anxious and stressed out by the mere thought of your job? 

Although you likely already know this, it’s time to change your job or perhaps your career. The purpose of our jobs and careers is to provide us with the financial means to live the life we want to live.

We are supposed to work in order to live. We were never meant to live to work. That is, our lives are not meant to revolve around our jobs.

Sadly, many of us have elevated our jobs to unmanageable levels. When we’re at home, we’re mentally at work or catching up on one or two things in our home office.

We take work home to finish up what we were doing in the office. We promise ourselves or our family members that it will just be a few minutes or a couple of hours. But before we know it, we’ve spent the entire weekend hunched over our laptops. 

Slowly but surely, our jobs are taking over every aspect of our lives. Work stress is negatively affecting our health. The long hours are impacting our intimate and familial relationships. Worse still, it’s not making us any happier.

It’s time for you to make a change in your career. It’s time for you to choose the people and the work that matters to you. 

10. Your attachment to the past.

Letting go of the past is a critical step you need to take to change yourself from who you are into who you want to be.

You need to let go of who you or other people thought you were and step into the person you wish to become. 

The future is unknown and that can be a little scary. There is uncertainty about the steps/decisions you’re making.

You’re not sure if you’ll like the “new” you or the life you’ve built. This could all be a huge mistake. What if your life is actually fine and you’re suffering from a midlife crisis or something?

It can be tempting to hold on to the past. While it doesn’t presently make you happy, it is familiar and comfortable. 

But you’ll never know for sure if you’re making the right or wrong decision until you let go of your past. Wipe the slate clean, forgive yourself for the mistakes you made, and write a new present and future.

Forget what you‘ve been told about yourself. Embrace who you‘d like to be. 

11. Your fears. 

Everyone is afraid of something. We’ve all got something that keeps us up at night, tossing and turning with worry.

For some, it’s the fear of being betrayed by a romantic partner. Others are afraid of losing their job and being broke. Some people fear being exposed as an imposter at work. Maybe you are afraid of change itself . 

While we all have our internal fears that we’re struggling with, not everyone allows those fears to stop them from pursuing goals or stepping out of their comfort zone.

For example, a person might be terrified that their spouse will one day betray them and their relationship. That fear, however, will not necessarily stop that person from taking a chance at love. It won’t stop them from being a loving partner and having a healthy relationship. 

You, though, might withdraw within yourself emotionally to protect against any chance of being hurt. As a result, you could block yourself off from being vulnerable and having a healthy, romantic relationship. 

It’s time for you to change how you deal with your fears. You need to learn better-coping skills to confront and handle your fears so they don’t shut you off from experiencing some of life’s greatest gifts.

Don’t let your fears hold you back from doing things you are interested in or stop you from welcoming new opportunities. 

Confront your fears and take away their power so you no longer feel unfulfilled and stuck.

12. Your environment.

Look around your space. What do you feel as you glance around? Are you at peace or tense? Is your space a reflection of you? Or is your environment just a place where you keep your stuff? 

Take a look outside. Do you feel inspired and calm when you look at where you live? Is your neighborhood soothing or is it busy and chaotic? Does the area feel vibrant and full of life? Or do you struggle to sleep at night because of all the noise?

The one thing you need to change about yourself might just be your environment. If your environment is not conducive to your well-being or creative endeavors, it’s not a place that will help you strive to be a better you.

You may not be in the position to move or alter your environment much. However, there are some things you can do to make your environment more soothing or reflective of your personality.

If moving is out of the question, try exploring more conducive environments. You could visit a friend or rent an Airbnb for a few days in an area that’s more ideal for you. If home doesn’t feel like home , consider redecorating or adding a few statement pieces to your environment to give it some personality.

Changing your environment can be as expensive or affordable as you want it to be. But financial constraints should not be your excuse for remaining in a space that does nothing for your well-being.

13. Your time management.

How do you spend your time? From the time you wake up in the mornings, are you rushing from one errand to another? Or do you while away your days and wonder how it’s suddenly time for bed?

If time seems to fly by and you can’t explain what you’ve been able to accomplish, you need to take stock of how you spend your days. Then make some changes so you can better manage your time. 

Do you spend hours on social media, scrolling from post to post or watching one video after another? Consider going on a social media detox for a day or two to give yourself a sense of how much time you’re wasting on the different social media apps. 

You could even extend your social media detox to include the TV, video games, and anything else that causes you to lose track of time. During the period of the detox, work on finishing the projects you’ve been putting off, spend time with your loved ones, or read a book. 

Pay attention to how you spend your days. Look at how much time you give to doing work that is meaningful to you and how much time you waste. 

Change the way you spend your time, so you live a life that is more focused and full of impact.

14. Your attitude toward change. 

Change is hard. Attempting to change ourselves is usually harder than we expect. We typically underestimate how quickly we can make sweeping changes to our lifestyles. We overestimate our ability to make changes, layering too many on at once. 

When we inevitably fail, we beat ourselves up about it. Never once considering that we took on too much for us to handle.

The desire to change is one that many people experience during their lives. People often fail at achieving lasting change because of the points mentioned above.

We fail to understand that changing things about ourselves is a gradual process. Rarely is it a one-and-done situation. 

To achieve lasting change, your attitude toward change and your ability to change needs to…well, change. You need to understand that adjusting habits and thinking patterns that you’ve had for years, if not decades, cannot happen in a week or even a month. 

It will take time.

You need to learn how to be compassionate with yourself when you fall below your expectations. After all, you are unlearning lessons that have been with you for much of your life. 

So cut yourself some slack.

A final note.

If you’ve done your best, sought help, and changed your thinking patterns, and you are still unable to change that aspect of your life that you dislike, look to the one area that actually needs changing—your attitude toward what you cannot change.

Accept your faults. 

As human beings, we are not perfect, nor will we ever be. All we can do is continue to strive to be better. Lasting change takes time and is a lot of work. Let’s face it, if it were easy, more people would do it. 

But when you‘ve done what you can, all that’s left for you to do is accept what you

cannot change. Stop fighting against your fallibility. 

Just do your best to be the best you.

Still not sure of the ways you should change, or how to go about it? Talking to someone can be highly motivating and keep you on track. It’s a great way to get your thoughts and your worries out of your head so you can work through them.

Speak to a life coach. Why? Because they are trained to help people in situations like yours. They can help you to perform some introspection to decide what to change while providing tailored advice to help you make those changes.

Bark.com is a website that helps you locate life coaches to work with – simply enter a few simple details and have a variety of life coaches contact you. You can then choose the one who is best suited to you.

While you may try to work through this yourself, it may be a bigger issue than self-help can address. And if it is affecting your mental well-being, relationships, or life in general, it is a significant thing that needs to be resolved.

Too many people try to muddle through and do their best to overcome issues that they never really get to grips with. If it’s at all possible in your circumstances, coaching is 100% the best way forward.

Here’s that link again to begin the process by completing a simple form.

You’ve already taken the first step just by searching for and reading this article. The worst thing you can do right now is nothing. The best thing is to speak to a life coach. The next best thing is to implement everything you’ve learned in this article by yourself. The choice is yours.

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essay on one thing you want to change about yourself

Home / Essay Samples / Life / Myself / Things I Would Like to Change About Myself

Things I Would Like to Change About Myself

  • Category: Life
  • Topic: About Myself

Pages: 1 (663 words)

  • Downloads: -->

Introduction

Pursuing personal growth, cultivating positive habits, embracing a mindset of growth.

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