non verbal communication essays

Nonverbal Communication Skills: 19 Theories & Findings

In it, he introduces the concept of dramaturgy, which compares everyday social interactions to actors’ portrayals of characters, suggesting that one’s social interactions are analogous to a string of varying performances (Ritzer, 2021).

Goffman’s work also included the concept of impression management. The key to impression management includes appearance; your manner of interacting; and the attitudes conveyed through gestures, facial expressions, and nonverbal skills (Ritzer, 2021).

William Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage.”

I’m not a trained actor, but teaching public speaking courses has made me aware that audiences seem to prefer speakers who use a variety of hand gestures. These gestures signify the speaker as “warm, agreeable, and energetic” (Goman, 2021).

Just that nugget of information has taught me to incorporate hand gestures to develop my public speaking skills.

What other nonverbal communication skills enhance daily interactions?

Before you continue, we thought you might like to download our three Positive Communication Exercises (PDF) for free . These science-based tools will help you and those you work with build better social skills and better connect with others.

This Article Contains:

What is nonverbal communication, 9 types of nonverbal communication skills, is nonverbal communication important, 2 psychology theories and models, 8 fascinating research findings, importance in counseling and healthcare, resources from positivepsychology.com, a take-home message.

Nonverbal communication is a way to convey information “achieved through facial expressions, gestures, touching (haptics), physical movements (kinesics), posture, body adornment (clothes, jewelry, hairstyle, tattoos, etc.), and even the tone, timbre, and volume of an individual’s voice (rather than spoken content)” (Navarro & Karlins, 2008, p. 2–4).

In this YouTube video, Joe Navarro explains several nonverbal communication cues, exposes some myths, and discusses his work with nonverbal communication in law enforcement.

Marco Iacoboni (2008, p. 81), author of Mirroring People , takes it a step further, stating that “gestures accompanying speech have a dual role of helping the speakers to express their thoughts and helping the listeners/viewers understand what is being said.”

To competently read body language, Navarro and Karlins (2008) provide suggestions such as rigorous observation and a familiarity with the person’s baseline behaviors. They also recommend watching for changes, or ‘tells.’

Navarro and Karlins (2008) advise becoming familiar with universal behaviors and contextualizing nonverbal cues. However, cultural norms could inhibit rigorous observation.

Characteristics of nonverbal communication

The United States is considered a low-context communication culture (MacLachlan, 2010). This means that much of the information in a message comes directly from words rather than through implication or body language.

This style of communication involves lots of verbal detail so as not to confuse listeners. Low-context cultures rely less on nonverbal communication, which can obscure or censor portions of the message.

Nonverbal communication is culturally determined, and it is largely unconscious. It indicates the speaker’s emotional state. When nonverbal cues conflict with the verbal message, it may convey confusion or deception (Navarro & Karlins, 2008).

Finally, nonverbal communication varies by gender and displays power differentials, information effective leaders can use to influence others (Hybels & Weaver, 2015; Henley, 1977).

Nonverbal communication of successful leaders

It’s essential for leaders to read body language, also known as decoding. Deciphering between engagement (e.g., nodding, tilting the head, open body postures) and disengagement (e.g., body tilting away, crossed arms and legs) can be the difference between success and failure (Goman, 2021).

Successful actors could be considered professional first-impression artists. Like actors, leaders often find themselves center stage; they must learn the art of creating first impressions.

Subjective awareness and the ability to express yourself nonverbally are known as encoding – crucial for positive first impressions. Advice from professional actors includes a maintaining a pleasant facial expression, good posture, pausing, breathing, relaxing, and avoiding hiding your hands (Shellenbarger, 2018).

This video , 8 Things Successful People Do to Look Confident , provides quick tips for confident body language even if you’re not feeling confident.

First impressions are said to be formed in less than seven seconds (Goman, 2021). In this short time, others formulate labels such as “powerful,” “submissive,” or “trustworthy.” Evolved leaders incorporate mindfulness to help.

Naz Beheshti (2018) states, “Evolved leaders… use nonverbal tools mindfully and deliberately to reinforce their message.” She goes on to say, “this lifts the value of your communication and your value as a leader” (Beheshti, 2018).

Awareness of self, others, and the situation (mindfulness) allows us to ensure that our gestures and body language align with our spoken words. This creates congruence and generates trustworthiness (Beheshti, 2018; Newberg & Waldman, 2013).

This means we are analyzing several, simultaneous nonverbal cues. A frustrated person may tap their foot, cross their arms, and tightly squeeze their biceps (Jones, 2013). These clusters may cross over and include a variety of nonverbal categories, summarized below.

1. Kinesics

Kinesics is the study of how we move our body, specifically the head, hands, body, and arms (Jones, 2013). This includes sending messages through facial expressions, gestures, eye contact, and posture.

Haptics is the study of touch or coming into physical contact with another person (Hybels & Weaver, 2015). Throughout history, touch has been surrounded by mystery and taboo. We are perplexed by healing touch and riveted by stories of infants who perished due to lack of touch. Touch can denote relationship, status, power, and personality (Henley, 1977).

Cultural norms dictate guidelines regarding touch. Mindfulness regarding social and environmental settings is prudent. We greet a friend at an informal party differently than we would greet a boss or coworker in a professional setting.

3. Proxemics

The study of space and distance is called proxemics, and it analyzes how people use the space around them (Hybels & Weaver, 2015).

This YouTube video is a fun demonstration of students completing a school project on personal space and the discomfort felt by both humans and animals when social norms are violated.

4. Territory

Territory is often used to display power or reveal a lack thereof.

“'[P]osture expansiveness,’ positioning oneself in a way that opens up the body and takes up space, activated a sense of power that produced behavioral changes in a subject independent of their actual rank or role in an organization” (Goman, 2021).

Expansiveness conveys power.

5. Environment

Environment includes objects we use to adorn ourselves and the artifacts we surround ourselves with in order to create an impression. These objects provide nonverbal cues that help others form impressions (Jones, 2013).

6. Paralinguistics

Paralinguistics, also known as vocalics, is the study of how we speak and involves pitch, volume, rate of speech, tone, quality, tempo, resonance, rhythm, and articulation to help determine the context of the message (Jones, 2013).

7. Chronemics

Chronemics is the study of time, including how it is used. Nancy Henley (1977, p. 43), author of Body Politics: Power, Sex & Nonverbal Communication , asserts “Time is far from a neutral philosophical/physical concept in our society: it is a political weapon.”

Henley (1977, p. 47) describes the concept of “ritual waiting,” stating, “The more important the person, the longer we will ungrudgingly wait for the service or honor of attention.”

8. Attractiveness

The power of drawing attention to oneself doesn’t rely on physical appeal alone. Although facial symmetry and fashion of adornment are important (Jones, 2013), people who master good eye contact, have a lively face, offer encouragement, and use open gestures are also considered attractive (Kuhnke, 2012).

9. Olfactics

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Nonverbal communication is very important, as you could reveal unintentional information, as well as cause your communication to be misinterpreted.

Leakage: Unintentional messages

Teaching social–emotional skills to incarcerated people provided me with a powerful lesson about the nuances of nonverbal communication. On a particularly challenging day, I thought it wise to meditate and center myself prior to entering the jail. However, upon seeing me, the people inside began inquiring what was going on with me. What did they detect?

Nonverbal leakage can be shown through micro-expressions, which are “very fast facial movements lasting 1/25 to 1/5 of a second” and indicate a person’s real feelings (Ekman, 2003, p. 214).

This YouTube video is the opening scene of the series Lie to Me , based on the work of Paul Ekman regarding micro-expressions.

Varying statistics on the value of nonverbal communication may cause concern for those less practiced, but which statistics are accurate?

Crossed messages

The original research from Mehrabian and Ferris (1967) regarding nonverbal communication is widely interpreted. Elizabeth Kuhnke (2012, p. 10), author of Body Language for Dummies , interprets the study, saying, “55% of the emotional message in face-to-face communication results from body language.”

A nonverbal communication formula often cited is 7–38–55, which indicates 7% of the message comes from words, 38% vocal, and 55% facial. However, Lapakko (2007) believes this formula is reckless, faulty, and misleading. Sometimes the nonverbal elements of a message, such as gestures with directions, are incredibly important, and at other times incidental.

In addition, what something “means” in communication is connected to such variables as culture, history of the relationship, people’s intentions, personal experiences, time of day and specific words used. It would be naive to suggest all these nuances could be neatly quantified, and therefore attributing a precise formula to nonverbal communication is flawed in many ways.

So regardless of statistics and formulas, we know that nonverbal communication is essential and that people skilled at both reading and interpreting body language tend to enjoy greater success in life than those not skilled (Goleman, 1997).

Basic emotion theory

Basic emotion theory (BET) posits that emotions are a “grammar of social living” that situate us in the social and moral order of society (Keltner, Sauter, Tracy, & Cowen, 2019, p. 133). In addition, emotions structure interactions, particularly in relationships that matter. BET is integral to emotional expression.

Foundational to BET is the assumption that emotional expressions coordinate social interactions in three ways:

• Through rapid conveyance of important information to aid in decision making
• To evoke specific responses
• To serve as incentives for others’ actions

This is accomplished through reward systems such as parents smiling and caressing a child who exhibits specific behaviors (Keltner et al., 2019).

BET initially focused on six basic emotions. Literature reveals there are over 20 emotions with distinct, multimodal expressions, providing a deeper structure and highlighting the advancing nature of emotional expression (Keltner et al., 2019).

Neural resonance

Two people who like each other will mirror each other’s facial expressions, gestures, postures, vocalics, and movements. This is known as neural resonance, and it aids the accurate transfer of information from one person to another (Newberg & Waldman, 2013).

To fully understand what another is saying, “you have to listen to and observe the other person as deeply and fully as possible” (Newberg & Waldman, 2013, p. 81). Neural resonance uses mirror neurons to create cooperation, empathy, and trust.

Studying nonverbal communication is revealing and intriguing. Most experts will include aspects such as eyes, facial expressions, and hands, but digging deeper reveals less-acknowledged nonverbal nuggets.

1. The benefits of yawning

Yawning is one of the fastest and simplest ways to lower mental stress and anxiety (Waldman & Manning, 2017). Social norms dictate that we refrain from yawning in specific settings, but yawning has many benefits. Did you know that snipers are taught to yawn before pulling the trigger (Waldman & Manning, 2017)?

According to Waldman and Manning (2017), yawning stimulates alertness and concentration; optimizes brain activity and metabolism; improves cognitive functioning; increases recall, consciousness, and introspection; decreases stress and relaxes the upper body; recalibrates a sense of timing; enhances social awareness and empathy; and increases sensuality and pleasure.

2. Feet don’t lie

According to Navarro and Karlins (2008), the most honest part of our body is our feet, as demonstrated by small children who dance with happiness or stomp in frustration. Many people look to the face for truth; Navarro and Karlins take the opposite approach:

“When it comes to honesty, truthfulness decreases as we move from the feet to the head” (Navarro & Karlins, 2008, p. 56), reasoning that emotions are suppressed through fabricated facial expression.

3. Gestures that help

Gestures improve memory and comprehension skills. Gestures may convey information that can influence how listeners respond, depending on the hand being used. “We tend to express positive ideas with our dominant hand and negative ideas with the other hand” (Newberg & Waldman, 2013, p. 44).

4. The eyes have it

“Social network circuits are stimulated through face-to-face eye contact, decreasing cortisol, and increasing oxytocin. The result is increased empathy, social cooperation, and positive communication” (Newberg & Waldman, 2013, p. 135).

Eyes reveal a lot about us. When we are aroused, troubled, concerned, or nervous, our blink rate increases. Once we relax, our blink rate returns to normal (Navarro & Karlins, 2008).

5. Power posing for success

Body language affects how others see us and how we view ourselves. In this YouTube video, Amy Cuddy discusses her research on power posing and how it affects success.

Amy Cuddy’s book is also discussed in our article listing books on imposter syndrome .

6. Fingers crossed

One explanation of the origin of crossing fingers for good luck comes from early beliefs in the power of the cross. The intersection of the digits, epitomizing the cross, was thought to denote a concentration of good spirits and served to anchor a wish until it came true (Keyser, 2014).

7. Fake positivity is harmful

Positivity that doesn’t register in your body or heart can be harmful. According to Barbara Fredrickson (2009, p. 180), “fake smiles, just like sneers of anger, predict heart wall collapse.” To truly benefit from a smile, touch, or embrace, you need to slow down and make it heartfelt.

8. Stand up straight

Poor posture can reduce oxygen intake by 30%, resulting in less energy (Gordon, 2003). Stooping over can make us look and feel old and out of touch. By straightening up, we can make significant differences in how we think and feel. The effect is bi-directional; attitude influences posture, just as posture influences attitude.

Good rapport between clients and practitioners stems from mirroring and synchronicity associated with neural resonance (Finset & Piccolo, 2011; Newberg & Waldman, 2013).

Carl Rogers’s Client-Centered Therapy is based on an empathetic understanding of clients. Nonverbal communication provides valuable information for both the client and the therapist. Showing you like and accept a client may be the most important information a therapist can convey (Finset & Piccolo, 2011).

Nonverbal patterns in therapy evolve over time. Specific behaviors that further the therapeutic process include “a moderate amount of head nodding and smiling; frequent, but not staring, eye contact; active, but not extreme, facial responsiveness; and a warm, relaxed, interested vocal tone” (Finset & Piccolo, 2011, p. 122).

Conscious awareness of nonverbal cues can aid in rapport building. Leaning toward the other signals comfort, whereas leaning away or crossing your arms signals discomfort (Navarro & Karlins, 2008).

Torsos and shoulder blades seem innocuous; however, blading away (turning slightly) from another person shows discomfort, while blading toward or facing another squarely shows a level of comfort (Navarro & Karlins, 2008).

Open palms are an ancient sign of trustworthiness that help establish rapport and are considered nonthreatening (Kuhnke, 2012). Hidden hands (placed in pockets or behind backs) signal disconnection and reluctance to engage. To display respect, keep an open posture with your muscles relaxed and weight evenly distributed.

Mirroring and matching go a long way to show synchronicity. Be careful to avoid mimicry, which signals disrespect (Kuhnke, 2012). Too much of a good thing can jeopardize credibility. An extended, fixed gaze into another’s eyes or effortful smiling can seem awkward, or worse.

This short YouTube video explains the dynamics of fluctuating facial expressions, based on the work of Charles Darwin and Paul Ekman.

This Silent Connections worksheet is an exercise for groups that combines mindfulness and nonverbal communication to build connections.

Someone who lacks the ability to make eye contact during conversation can be easily misinterpreted. To overcome this nonverbal communication issue, our Strategies for Maintaining Eye Contact can be very useful.

Our blog post 49 Communication Activities, Exercises, and Games includes six nonverbal communication activities for adults and three nonverbal exercises that work for families and children.

The blog post What Is Assertive Communication? 10 Real-Life Examples includes nonverbal qualities that complement and enhance assertive statements. Hints for eye contact, facial expressions, and posture can be found throughout.

In the blog post Cultivating Social Intelligence : 3 Ways to Understand Others , we discuss characteristics of social intelligence, including body language.

If you’re looking for more science-based ways to help others communicate better, this collection contains 17 validated positive communication tools for practitioners. Use them to help others improve their communication skills and form deeper and more positive relationships.

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Nonverbal communication is an essential communication skill. Nonverbal expertise aids in delivering clear messages and forming positive impressions. It doesn’t have to be a big gesture to make a difference. Gently stroking the hand of a grieving friend speaks volumes.

Viewing life as a series of dramatic performances, as implied by both Shakespeare and Goffman, can add a sense of intrigue and adventure to enhancing nonverbal communication. These essential skills will help us achieve goals.

Just as the highly motivated thespian will study and polish their craft, anyone wanting to succeed in their career or interpersonal relationships can study and practice the nuances of nonverbal communication.

Actors and public speakers often practice their craft in front of a mirror or videotape themselves to reflect on strengths and weaknesses.

This article includes a myriad of resources to help improve nonverbal communication skills with many additional resources available.

By starting with something as simple as posture, we exit stage right, headed toward the competency of center stage. Break a leg!

We hope you enjoyed reading this article. Don’t forget to download our three Positive Communication Exercises (PDF) for free .

• Beheshti, N. (2018, September 20). The power of mindful nonverbal communication. Forbes . Retrieved April 26, 2021, from https://www.forbes.com/sites/nazbeheshti/2018/09/20/beyond-language-the-power-of-mindful-nonverbal-communication/?sh=6f40b3d71501
• Ekman, P. (2003). Emotions revealed: Recognizing faces and feelings to improve communication and emotional life . Holt Paperbacks.
• Finset, A., & Piccolo, L. D. (2011). Nonverbal communication in clinical contexts. In M. Rimondini (Ed.), Communication in cognitive-behavioral therapy (pp. 107–128).  Springer Science + Business Media.
• Fredrickson, B. L. (2009). Positivity . Crown Publishing Group.
• Goffman, E. (1956). The presentation of self in everyday life . University of Edinburgh.
• Goleman, D. (1997). Emotional intelligence . Bantam Trade Paperback.
• Goman, C. K. (2018, August 26). 5 Ways body language impacts leadership results. Forbes. Retrieved May 1, 2021, from https://www.forbes.com/sites/carolkinseygoman/2018/08/26/5-ways-body-language-impacts-leadership-results/?sh=5c1b235c536a
• Gordon, J. (2003). Energy addict: 101 Physical, mental, & spiritual ways to energize your life . Berkley Publishing Group.
• Henley, N. M. (1977). Body politics: Power, sex and nonverbal communication . Simon & Schuster.
• Hybels, S., & Weaver, R. L. (2015). Communicating effectively . McGraw-Hill Education.
• Iacoboni, M. (2008). Mirroring people: The new science of how we connect with others . Farrar, Straus and Giroux.
• Jones, R. (2013). Communication in the real world: An introduction to communication studies . University of Minnesota Libraries.
• Keltner, D., Sauter, D., Tracy, J., & Cowen, A. (2019). Emotional expression: Advances in basic emotion theory. Journal of Nonverbal Behavior , 43 (3), 133–160.
• Keyser, H. (2014, March 21). Why do we cross our fingers for good luck? Mental Floss . Retrieved May 27, 2021, from https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/55702/why-do-we-cross-our-fingers-good-luck
• Kuhnke, E. (2012). Body language for dummies . John Wiley & Sons.
• Lapakko, D. (2007). Communication is 93% nonverbal: An urban legend proliferates. Communication and Theater Association of Minnesota Journal , 34 (2), 7–19.
• MacLachlan, M. (2010, February 12). Cross-cultural communication styles: High and low context. Communicaid. Retrieved May 10, 2021, from https://www.communicaid.com/cross-cultural-training/blog/high-and-low-context/
• Mehrabian, A., & Ferris, S. R. (1967). Inference of attitudes from nonverbal communication in two channels.  Journal of Consulting Psychology, 31 (3), 248–252.
• Navarro, J., & Karlins, M. P. (2008). What every body is saying . Harper-Collins.
• Newberg, A. M., & Waldman, M. R. (2013). Words can change your brain . Avery.
• Ritzer, G. (2021). Essentials of sociology (4th ed.). SAGE.
• Shellenbarger, S. (2018, January 30). The mistakes you make in a meeting’s first milliseconds. Wall Street Journal . Retrieved May 22, 2021, from https://www.wsj.com/articles/the-mistakes-you-make-in-a-meetings-first-milliseconds-1517322312
• Waldman, M. R., & Manning, C. P. (2017). NeuroWisdom: The new brain science of money, happiness, and success . Diversion Books.

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Types of Nonverbal Communication

Often you don't need words at all

Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

 Tim Robberts / Getty Images

Why Nonverbal Communication Is Important

• How to Improve

Nonverbal communication means conveying information without using words. This might involve using certain facial expressions or hand gestures to make a specific point, or it could involve the use (or non-use) of eye contact, physical proximity, and other nonverbal cues to get a message across.

A substantial portion of our communication is nonverbal. In fact, some researchers suggest that the percentage of nonverbal communication is four times that of verbal communication, with 80% of what we communicate involving our actions and gestures versus only 20% being conveyed with the use of words.

Every day, we respond to thousands of nonverbal cues and behaviors, including postures, facial expressions, eye gaze, gestures, and tone of voice. From our handshakes to our hairstyles, our nonverbal communication reveals who we are and impacts how we relate to other people.

9 Types of Nonverbal Communication

Scientific research on nonverbal communication and behavior began with the 1872 publication of Charles Darwin's The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals . Since that time, a wealth of research has been devoted to the types, effects, and expressions of unspoken communication and behavior .

Nonverbal Communication Types

While these signals can be so subtle that we are not consciously aware of them, research has identified nine types of nonverbal communication. These nonverbal communication types are:

• Facial expressions
• Paralinguistics (such as loudness or tone of voice)
• Body language
• Proxemics or personal space
• Eye gaze, haptics (touch)
• Artifacts (objects and images)

Facial Expressions

Facial expressions are responsible for a huge proportion of nonverbal communication. Consider how much information can be conveyed with a smile or a frown. The look on a person's face is often the first thing we see, even before we hear what they have to say.

While nonverbal communication and behavior can vary dramatically between cultures, the facial expressions for happiness, sadness, anger, and fear are similar throughout the world.

Deliberate movements and signals are an important way to communicate meaning without words. Common gestures include waving, pointing, and giving a "thumbs up" sign. Other gestures are arbitrary and related to culture.

For example, in the U.S., putting the index and middle finger in the shape of a "V" with your palm facing out is often considered to be a sign of peace or victory. Yet, in Britain, Australia, and other parts of the world, this gesture can be considered an insult.

Nonverbal communication via gestures is so powerful and influential that some judges place limits on which ones are allowed in the courtroom, where they can sway juror opinions. An attorney might glance at their watch to suggest that the opposing lawyer's argument is tedious, for instance. Or they may roll their eyes during a witness's testimony in an attempt to undermine that person's credibility.

Paralinguistics

Paralinguistics refers to vocal communication that is separate from actual language. This form of nonverbal communication includes factors such as tone of voice, loudness, inflection, and pitch.

For example, consider the powerful effect that tone of voice can have on the meaning of a sentence. When said in a strong tone of voice, listeners might interpret a statement as approval and enthusiasm. The same words said in a hesitant tone can convey disapproval and a lack of interest.

Body Language and Posture

Posture and movement can also provide a great deal of information. Research on body language has grown significantly since the 1970s, with popular media focusing on the over-interpretation of defensive postures such as arm-crossing and leg-crossing, especially after the publication of Julius Fast's book Body Language .

While these nonverbal communications can indicate feelings and attitudes , body language is often subtle and less definitive than previously believed.

People often refer to their need for "personal space." This is known as proxemics and is another important type of nonverbal communication.

The amount of distance we need and the amount of space we perceive as belonging to us are influenced by several factors. Among them are social norms , cultural expectations, situational factors, personality characteristics, and level of familiarity.

The amount of personal space needed when having a casual conversation with another person can vary between 18 inches and four feet. The personal distance needed when speaking to a crowd of people is usually around 10 to 12 feet.

The eyes play a role in nonverbal communication, with such things as looking, staring, and blinking being important cues. For example, when you encounter people or things that you like, your rate of blinking increases and your pupils dilate.

People's eyes can indicate a range of emotions , including hostility, interest, and attraction. People also often utilize eye gaze cues to gauge a person's honesty. Normal, steady eye contact is often taken as a sign that a person is telling the truth and is trustworthy. Shifty eyes and an inability to maintain eye contact, on the other hand, is frequently seen as an indicator that someone is lying or being deceptive.

However, some research suggests that eye gaze does not accurately predict lying behavior.

Communicating through touch is another important nonverbal communication behavior. Touch can be used to communicate affection, familiarity, sympathy, and other emotions .

In her book Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters , author Julia Wood writes that touch is also often used to communicate both status and power. High-status individuals tend to invade other people's personal space with greater frequency and intensity than lower-status individuals.

Sex differences also play a role in how people utilize touch to communicate meaning. Women tend to use touch to convey care, concern, and nurturance. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to use touch to assert power or control over others.

There has been a substantial amount of research on the importance of touch in infancy and early childhood. Harry Harlow's classic monkey study , for example, demonstrated how being deprived of touch impedes development. In the experiments, baby monkeys raised by wire mothers experienced permanent deficits in behavior and social interaction.

Our choice of clothing, hairstyle, and other appearance factors are also considered a means of nonverbal communication. Research on color psychology has demonstrated that different colors can evoke different moods. Appearance can also alter physiological reactions, judgments, and interpretations.

Just think of all the subtle judgments you quickly make about someone based on their appearance. These first impressions are important, which is why experts suggest that job seekers dress appropriately for interviews with potential employers.

Researchers have found that appearance can even play a role in how much people earn. Attractive people tend to earn more and receive other fringe benefits, including higher-quality jobs.

Culture is an important influence on how appearances are judged. While thinness tends to be valued in Western cultures, some African cultures relate full-figured bodies to better health, wealth, and social status.

Objects and images are also tools that can be used to communicate nonverbally. On an online forum, for example, you might select an avatar to represent your identity and to communicate information about who you are and the things you like.

People often spend a great deal of time developing a particular image and surrounding themselves with objects designed to convey information about the things that are important to them. Uniforms, for example, can be used to transmit a tremendous amount of information about a person.

A soldier will don fatigues, a police officer will wear a specific uniform, and a doctor will wear a white lab coat. At a mere glance, these outfits tell others what that person does for a living. That makes them a powerful form of nonverbal communication.

Nonverbal Communication Examples

Think of all the ways you communicate nonverbally in your own life. You can find examples of nonverbal communication at home, at work, and in other situations.

Nonverbal Communication at Home

Consider all the ways that tone of voice might change the meaning of a sentence when talking with a family member. One example is when you ask your partner how they are doing and they respond with, "I'm fine." How they say these words reveals a tremendous amount about how they are truly feeling.

A bright, happy tone of voice would suggest that they are doing quite well. A cold tone of voice might suggest that they are not fine but don't wish to discuss it. A somber, downcast tone might indicate that they are the opposite of fine but may want to talk about why.

Other examples of nonverbal communication at home include:

• Going to your partner swiftly when they call for you (as opposed to taking your time or not responding at all)
• Greeting your child with a smile when they walk into the room to show that you're happy to see them
• Leaning in when your loved one speaks to show that you are listening and that you are interested in what they're saying
• Shoving your fist into the air when you're upset that something isn't working

Nonverbal Communication in the Workplace

You can also find nonverbal communication in the workplace. Examples of this include:

• Looking co-workers in the eye when speaking with them to be fully engaged in the interaction
• Throwing your hands in the air when you are frustrated with a project
• Using excitement in your voice when leading work meetings to project your passion for a specific topic
• Walking down the hall with your head held high to convey confidence in your abilities

Nonverbal Communication in Other Situations

Here are a few additional examples of nonverbal communication that say a lot without you having to say anything at all:

• Greeting an old friend at a restaurant with a hug, handshake, or fist bump
• Placing your hand on someone's arm when they are talking to you at a party to convey friendliness or concern
• Rolling your eyes at someone who is chatting excessively with a store clerk as a line begins to form
• Scowling at someone who has cut you off in traffic, or "flipping them the bird"

Nonverbal communication serves an important role in conveying meaning. Some benefits it provides include:

• Strengthening relationships : Nonverbal communication fosters closeness and intimacy in interpersonal relationships.
• Substituting for spoken words : Signaling information that a person might not be able to say aloud. This can be helpful in situations where a person might not be heard (such as a noisy workplace) or in therapy situations where a mental health professional can look at nonverbal behaviors to learn more about how a client might be feeling.
• Reinforcing meaning : Matching nonverbal communication to spoken words can help add clarity and reinforce important points.
• Regulating conversation : Nonverbal signals can also help regulate the flow of conversation and indicate both the start and end of a message or topic.

Nonverbal communication is important because it can provide valuable information, reinforce the meaning of spoken words, help convey trust, and add clarity to your message.

How to Improve Your Nonverbal Communication Skills

If you want to develop more confident body language or improve your ability to read other people's nonverbal communication behaviors, these tips can help:

• Pay attention to your own behaviors : Notice the gestures you use when you're happy versus when you're upset. Think about how you change the tone of your voice depending on the emotions you are feeling. Being aware of your own nonverbal communication tendencies is the first step to changing the ones you want to change. It can also give you insight into how you're feeling if you're having trouble putting it into words.
• Become a student of others : It can also be helpful to consider how others around you communicate nonverbally. What do their facial expressions say? What type of gestures do they use? Becoming familiar with their nonverbal communication patterns helps you recognize when they might be feeling a certain way quicker because you're actively watching for these cues. It can also help you recognize nonverbal behaviors you may want to adopt yourself (such as standing tall when talking to others to display self-confidence ).
• Look for incongruent nonverbal cues : Do you say that you're fine, then slam cupboard doors to show that you're upset? This can give those around you mixed messages. Or maybe when someone is speaking with you, they are saying yes while shaking their head no. This is another example of incongruent behavior. Both can be signs of feeling a certain way but not yet being ready to admit or discuss it.
• Think before you act : If your middle finger seems to automatically fly up when a car cuts you off—even if your young child is in the back seat, causing you to regret it as soon as it happens—you can work to stop this reaction. Train yourself to stop and think before you act. This can help you eliminate or replace nonverbal behaviors that you've been wanting to change.
• Ask before you assume : Certain types of nonverbal communication can mean different things in different cultures. They can also vary based on someone's personality . Before assuming that a person's body language or tone means something definitively, ask. "I notice that you won't look me in the eye when we speak. Are you upset with me?" Give them the opportunity to explain how they are feeling so you know for sure.

A Word From Verywell

Nonverbal communication plays an important role in how we convey meaning and information to others, as well as how we interpret the actions of those around us.

The important thing to remember when looking at nonverbal behaviors is to consider the actions in groups. Consider what a person says verbally, combined with their expressions, appearance, and tone of voice and it can tell you a great deal about what that person is really trying to say.

American Psychological Association. Nonverbal communication (NVC) .

Hull R. The art of nonverbal communication in practice . Hear J . 2016;69(5);22-24. doi:10.1097/01.HJ.0000483270.59643.cc

Frith C. Role of facial expressions in social interactions . Philos Trans R Soc B Biol Sci . 2009;364(1535):3453-8. doi:10.1098/rstb.2009.0142

Goldin-Meadow S. How gesture works to change our minds . Trends Neurosci Educ . 2014;3(1):4-6. doi:10.1016/j.tine.2014.01.002

Guyer JJ, Briñol P, Vaughan-Johnston TI, Fabrigar LR, Moreno L, Petty RE. Paralinguistic features communicated through voice can affect appraisals of confidence and evaluative judgments .  J Nonverbal Behav . 2021;45(4):479-504. doi:10.1007/s10919-021-00374-2

Abdulghafor R, Turaev S, Ali MAH. Body language analysis in healthcare: An overview .  Healthcare (Basel) . 2022;10(7):1251. doi:10.3390/healthcare10071251

Mccall C, Singer T. Facing off with unfair others: introducing proxemic imaging as an implicit measure of approach and avoidance during social interaction . PLoS One . 2015;10(2):e0117532. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0117532

Wiseman R, Watt C, ten Brinke L, Porter S, Couper SL, Rankin C. The eyes don't have it: lie detection and Neuro-Linguistic Programming .  PLoS One . 2012;7(7):e40259. doi:10.1371/journal.pone.0040259

Sekerdej M, Simão C, Waldzus S, Brito R. Keeping in touch with context: Non-verbal behavior as a manifestation of communality and dominance . J Nonverbal Behav . 2018;42(3):311-326. doi:10.1007/s10919-018-0279-2

Bambaeeroo F, Shokrpour N. The impact of the teachers' non-verbal communication on success in teaching .  J Adv Med Educ Prof . 2017;5(2):51-59.

Dilmaghani M. Beauty perks: Physical appearance, earnings, and fringe benefits . Economics & Human Biology . 2020;38:100889. doi:10.1016/j.ehb.2020.100889

Darwin C. The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals .

Wood J.  Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters .

By Kendra Cherry, MSEd Kendra Cherry, MS, is a psychosocial rehabilitation specialist, psychology educator, and author of the "Everything Psychology Book."

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6.1: Introduction to Nonverbal Communication

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• Daniel Usera & contributing authors
• Austin Community College

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LEARNING OUTCOMES

• Define nonverbal communication and explain its metacommunicative nature.
• Describe the process of nonverbal communication.
• Assess the impact of nonverbal communication in interpersonal relationships.

INTRO TO NONVERBAL COMMUNICATION

Defining nonverbal communication

Your partner flashes a big smile when you surprise them for their birthday even though they secretly are embarrassed. You send an emoji “face with tears of joy” (��) to your BFF after getting a perfect score on a rhetorical criticism paper. You kiss someone on a first date. What do these scenarios have in common? Nonverbal communication of course -- an essential but frequently misunderstood dimension of interpersonal relations (Gifford, 2011). Nonverbal communication is often simply defined as communication without words. Others have noted that nonverbal communication includes “all behaviors that are not words” (Guerrero & Floyd, 2006, p. 4). Regardless of the deceiving simplicity of its definition, know that nonverbal communication is very complex.

In everyday life, nonverbal communication is multimodal and multifunctional in nature serving many functions. It is closely linked to how we feel about our relationships with others and how we manage those relationships. In interpersonal interaction, nonverbal messages can be found in facial expressions, eyes, body language, touching as well as clothing, tone of voice, posture and even spatial distance. Indeed, you can say a lot without saying anything, or as psychologist and philosopher Paul Watzlawick (1978) observed in the first axiom of his interpersonal communication theory that you cannot not communicate. The inevitability of sending and receiving messages is extremely important to understand because it means that each of us is a type of “transmitter” that cannot be shut off. Nonverbal behaviors are implicated in messages of intimacy, arousal and composure, dominance, formal, and task or social orientation. Whether intentional or unintentional, deceitful or sincere, no matter what we do, we give off information about ourselves. In short, nonverbal communication is an important part of human interaction and always present in face-to-face interactions.

A related concept is what social scientists call metacommunication -- communicating about communication. In interpersonal relationships, it involves how people perceive you, not just your words. For example, if I say, “Nice to see you!” to someone and roll my eyes at the same time, they will likely doubt my sincerity.

This example illustrates one of the more interesting effects of nonverbal messages: most people tend to believe the nonverbal message over the verbal message if the two appear to be in disagreement (Knapp, 1972; Knapp, Earnest, Griffin, & McGlone, 2020; Malandro & Barker, 1983; Mehrabian, 1981). People seem to believe that actions really do speak louder than words. As a result, they place a disproportionate emphasis on the nonverbal response -- therefore it’s always a good idea to make nonverbal behavior consistent with our verbal messages (Hackman & Johnson, 2000).

So, welcome to the world of nonverbal communication. Its types, its contexts, and its impacts -- all of these will be explored in the pages that follow.

The process of nonverbal communication

Is nonverbal communication its own type of language? Yes and no. Like language, the fundamental process of nonverbal communication consists of a message encoded in a selected medium (body language, for example) that is then decoded. When you form language and speak it, your brain encodes a thought into words and intelligible sounds. For example, if you want to tell someone to leave the room, you can simply speak the words, “Please leave the room.” Nonverbally, you can also encode an extra layer of “illustration” -- for example, first pointing at the person and then at the door.

Some forms of nonverbal communication are emblematic in nature, where the performance stands for a concrete idea. Emblems are gestures like pointing, giving a thumbs up, or signing “OK” in specific contexts where those gestures are intelligible. Other nonverbal emblems include wearing a uniform to indicate team membership or sporting a tattoo that has a literal, unambiguous meaning. The most famous emblem of all, of course, may be the infamous “middle finger.”

However, not all nonverbal communication is emblematic. If you sway in your chair during a lecture, the meaning of that behavior may not be immediately obvious. Perhaps you need to go to the bathroom. Maybe you’re just restless. You could even be doing light exercises to help stay awake. Without asking you, any interpretation would be tentative -- a guess. In fact, you might not even know the answer to what your behavior means. It turns out that some people perform nonverbal gestures without realizing them. When some people speak before an audience, for example, they might look down a lot, move their legs a lot, or put their hands behind their backs -- all without realizing it. These are “adaptive” behaviors designed to subconsciously help the speaker feel better (more comfortable) about the situation they’re in.

How aware (or not) someone is of their nonverbal behavior raises the important question of intention . Certainly, some aspects of nonverbal are intentionally performed. Chances are, your clothing and hairstyle at the moment you’re reading this were intentional choices, but what about your posture and the position of your hands and arms? There are aspects of nonverbal communication that we may convey without meaning to. Goffman (1952) called the intentional aspects of nonverbal performance as “cues given” and the unintentional aspects as “cues given off.” Whether intentional or not, these cues can be communicated via a variety of “media” (all of them associated with you) -- your eyes, smell, tone of voice, facial expressions, and gestures to name a few. Increasing your competence in nonverbal communication means learning to pay more attention to these unintentional aspects.

Later in this chapter, you will learn different channels of nonverbal communication. These channels are grouped into four categories: personal characteristics (aspects relating to a person’s physical features), environment (artifacts in a given location), motion (movement-oriented gestures), and vocal cues (relating to the non-linguistic aspects of talking).

The impact of nonverbal communication

You might have heard that 93% of communication is nonverbal. That figure comes from a famous study by Merhabian and Ferris (1967). Participants in their study were read aloud single words that they previously rated as either positive, neutral, or negative on-paper. When they were read aloud, they were read vocal tones that were previously rated as either neutral or positive. Then the experiment was repeated using facial cues, where the experimenter read the words while displaying certain facial cues (Mehrabian & Wiener, 1967). Mehrabian utilized the results to calculate the listener’s perceived attitudes, which were a combination of three cues in the following proportion: 7% verbal, 38% vocal (tone), and 55% facial expression.

Notice that these studies were focused on the utterance of single words, not complete sentences within a context. We know that our typical social interactions occur in contexts of complete thoughts and actions, not just single words. These studies, therefore, face issues with external validity (the ability to apply to actual social situations). This criticism (among others concerning sample size and possible participant biases) was expressed by Burgoon, Woodall, and Ferris (1989). Though you may hear the 93% number frequently expressed in popular culture, you now know that this is based on a very limited study.

So if it isn’t 93%, how much of communication is nonverbal? The only thing that scholars agree on is that it matters , and that it matters in many contexts. In the next section, we will explore 14 channels (yes, 14!) and the many ways they allow us to communicate ideas beyond the power of words. In the end, our competence in nonverbal communication can help determine how an interaction will proceed and, perhaps, whether it will take place at all.

LEARNING ACTIVITIES

Activity 1: Gestures List

Ask students: How do we communicate without words? What are some common gestures? Divide students into groups and give each group just two minutes to come up with as many ways of communicating without using words as they can.

Activity 2: Silent Scene

Divide students into pairs. Have each pair create a one-minute scene featuring a problem that needs to be solved. When performing the scene, neither member of the pair can talk (all communication has to be expressed nonverbally). Can the audience guess the content of the scene without any dialogue to help?

Ambady, N., & Weisbuch, M. (2010). Nonverbal behavior. In S. T. Fiske, D. T. Gilbert, & G. Lindzey (Eds.), Handbook of social psychology, ( pp. 464-497). Wiley.

Burgoon, J. Buller, D, & Woodall, W. (1989) Nonverbal communication: The unspoken dialogue . Harper and Row.

Gifford, R. (2011). The role of nonverbal communication in interpersonal relations. In L. Horowitz, & S. Strack (Eds.), Handbook of interpersonal psychology Theory, research, assessment, and therapeutic interventions (pp. 171-190). Wiley.

Goffman, E. (1959). The presentation of self in everyday life . Anchor Books.

Hackman, M.Z., & Johnson, C.E. (2000). Leadership: A communication perspective . Waveland.

Knapp, M. L. (1972). Nonverbal communication in human interaction . Holt, Rinehart and Winston.

Knapp, M., Earnest, W., Griffin, D., & McGlone, M. (2020). Lying and deception in human interaction (3rd ed.). Kendall Hunt.

Knapp, M., Hall, J., & Horgan, T. (2014). Nonverbal communication in human interaction (8th ed.). Wadsworth Cengage Learning.

Malandro, L. A., & Barker, L. (1983). Nonverbal Communication . Addison-Wesley.

Mehrabian, A. (1981). Silent Messages: Implicit Communication of Emotions and Attitudes (2nd ed.). Wadsworth.

Mehrabian, A. & Ferris, S. (1967). Inference of attitudes from nonverbal communication in two channels. Journal of Consulting Psychology , 13 , 248-252.

Mehrabian A., & Wiener, M. (1967). Decoding of inconsistent communications. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology , 6 , 109-114.

Watzlawick, P. (1978). The language of change: Elements of therapeutic communication . Norton W.W., & Company, Inc.

Competence: One’s ability to encode and decode nonverbal communication.

Decoding: The process of interpreting and assigning meaning to a message.

Encoding: The process of organizing a message, choosing words and sentence structure, and verbalizing the message.

Medium: The channel or system by which information is transmitted.

Metacommunication: Messages that refer to other messages, usually in the context of a relationship.

Nonverbal Communication: Communication enacted by means other than words.

Emblem: A nonverbal signal that stands for an established semantic meaning.

1. Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are

At the TEDGlobal 2012 conference, social psychologist Amy Cuddy gave the talk “Your body language shapes who you are,” based on research in which she detailed the effects of “power posing.” Do you agree or disagree with her that our body language can change other people’s perceptions—and perhaps even our own body chemistry—simply by changing body positions? Are her findings consistent with definitions of nonverbal communication? https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_may_shape_who_you_are?language=en

2. The Secrets of Body Language

Full documentary ; This 90-minute documenary shows us several examples of this, including the summit meetings between U.S. president Bill Clinton, Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat, and Israeli prime minister Ehud Barak which took place at the dawning of the new millennium, and President Richard Nixon's offerings of transparency while in the throes of the Watergate scandal more than two decades earlier. In each instance, the simplest pat on the back, crossing of arms across the chest, quiver in the voice, speed of a footstep or stance during a handshake illustrates underlying tensions and doubt. Can you identify or describe the process of creating and interpreting nonverbal cues in this documentary?

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What is body language?

The importance of body language, types of body language and nonverbal communication, how body language can go wrong, how to improve nonverbal communication, tip 1: learn to manage stress in the moment, tip 2: develop your emotional awareness, tip 3: better read body language, body language and nonverbal communication communicating without words.

Your facial expressions, gestures, posture, and tone of voice are powerful communication tools. Here’s how to read and use body language to build better relationships at home and work.

Body language is the use of physical behavior, expressions, and mannerisms to communicate nonverbally, often done instinctively rather than consciously. Whether you’re aware of it or not, when you interact with others, you’re continuously giving and receiving wordless signals. All of your nonverbal behaviors—the gestures you make, your posture, your tone of voice, how much eye contact you make—send strong messages.

In fact, it’s not the words that you use but your nonverbal cues or body language that speak the loudest. They can put people at ease, build trust, and draw others towards you, or they can offend, confuse, and undermine what you’re trying to convey. These messages don’t stop when you stop speaking either. Even when you’re silent, you’re still communicating nonverbally.

In some instances, what comes out of your mouth and what you communicate through your body language may be two totally different things. If you say one thing, but your body language says something else, your listener will likely feel that you’re being dishonest. If you say “yes” while shaking your head no, for example. When faced with such mixed signals, the listener has to choose whether to believe your verbal or nonverbal message. Since body language is a natural, unconscious language that broadcasts your true feelings and intentions, they’ll likely choose the nonverbal message.

However, by improving how you understand and use body language and nonverbal communication, you can express what you really mean, connect better with others, and build stronger, more rewarding relationships—both in your personal and professional relationships.

Your nonverbal communication cues—the way you listen, look, move, and react—tell the person you’re communicating with whether or not you care, if you’re being truthful, and how well you’re listening. When your nonverbal signals match up with the words you’re saying, they increase trust, clarity, and rapport. When they don’t, they can generate tension, mistrust, and confusion.

If you want to become a better communicator, it’s important to become more sensitive not only to the body language and nonverbal cues of others, but also to your own.

Body language can play five roles:

• Repetition: It repeats and often strengthens the message you’re making verbally.
• Contradiction: It can contradict the message you’re trying to convey, thus indicating to your listener that you may not be telling the truth.
• Substitution: It can substitute for a verbal message. For example, your facial expression often conveys a far more vivid message than words ever can.
• Complementing: It may add to or complement your verbal message. As a boss, if you pat an employee on the back in addition to giving praise, it can increase the impact of your message.
• Accenting: It may accent or underline a verbal message. Pounding the table, for example, can underline the importance of your message.

The many different types of nonverbal communication or body language include:

Facial expressions. The human face is extremely expressive, able to convey countless emotions without saying a word. And unlike some forms of nonverbal communication, facial expressions are universal. The facial expressions for happiness, sadness, anger, surprise, fear, and disgust are the same across cultures.

Body movement and posture. Consider how your perceptions of people are affected by the way they sit, walk, stand, or hold their head. The way you move and carry yourself communicates a wealth of information to the world. This type of nonverbal communication includes your posture, bearing, stance, and the subtle movements you make.

Gestures. Gestures are woven into the fabric of our daily lives. You may wave, point, beckon, or use your hands when arguing or speaking animatedly, often expressing yourself with gestures without thinking. However, the meaning of some gestures can be very different across cultures. While the “OK” sign made with the hand, for example, usually conveys a positive message in English-speaking countries, it’s considered offensive in countries such as Germany, Russia, and Brazil. So, it’s important to be careful of how you use gestures to avoid misinterpretation.

Eye contact. Since the visual sense is dominant for most people, eye contact is an especially important type of nonverbal communication. The way you look at someone can communicate many things, including interest, affection, hostility, or attraction. Eye contact is also important in maintaining the flow of conversation and for gauging the other person’s interest and response.

Touch. We communicate a great deal through touch. Think about the very different messages given by a weak handshake, a warm bear hug, a patronizing pat on the head, or a controlling grip on the arm, for example.

Space. Have you ever felt uncomfortable during a conversation because the other person was standing too close and invading your space? We all have a need for physical space, although that need differs depending on the culture, the situation, and the closeness of the relationship. You can use physical space to communicate many different nonverbal messages, including signals of intimacy and affection, aggression or dominance.

Voice. It’s not just what you say, it’s how you say it. When you speak, other people “read” your voice in addition to listening to your words. Things they pay attention to include your timing and pace, how loud you speak, your tone and inflection, and sounds that convey understanding, such as “ahh” and “uh-huh.” Think about how your tone of voice can indicate sarcasm, anger, affection, or confidence.

Can nonverbal communication be faked?

There are many books and websites that offer advice on how to use body language to your advantage. For example, they may instruct you on how to sit a certain way, steeple your fingers, or shake hands in order to appear confident or assert dominance. But the truth is that such tricks aren’t likely to work (unless you truly feel confident and in charge). That’s because you can’t control all of the signals you’re constantly sending about what you’re really thinking and feeling. And the harder you try, the more unnatural your signals are likely to come across.

However, that doesn’t mean that you have no control over your nonverbal cues. For example, if you disagree with or dislike what someone’s saying, you may use negative body language to rebuff the person’s message, such as crossing your arms, avoiding eye contact, or tapping your feet. You don’t have to agree, or even like what’s being said, but to communicate effectively and not put the other person on the defensive, you can make a conscious effort to avoid sending negative signals—by maintaining an open stance and truly attempting to understand what they’re saying, and why.

What you communicate through your body language and nonverbal signals affects how others see you, how well they like and respect you, and whether or not they trust you. Unfortunately, many people send confusing or negative nonverbal signals without even knowing it. When this happens, both connection and trust in relationships are damaged, as the following examples highlight:

• Jack believes he gets along great with his colleagues at work, but if you were to ask any of them, they would say that Jack is “intimidating” and “very intense.” Rather than just look at you, he seems to devour you with his eyes. And if he takes your hand, he lunges to get it and then squeezes so hard it hurts. Jack is a caring guy who secretly wishes he had more friends, but his nonverbal awkwardness keeps people at a distance and limits his ability to advance at work.
• Arlene is attractive and has no problem meeting eligible men, but she has a difficult time maintaining a relationship for longer than a few months. Arlene is funny and interesting, but even though she constantly laughs and smiles, she radiates tension. Her shoulders and eyebrows are noticeably raised, her voice is shrill, and her body is stiff. Being around Arlene makes many people feel anxious and uncomfortable. Arlene has a lot going for her that is undercut by the discomfort she evokes in others.
• Ted thought he had found the perfect match when he met Sharon, but Sharon wasn’t so sure. Ted is good looking, hardworking, and a smooth talker, but seemed to care more about his thoughts than Sharon’s. When Sharon had something to say, Ted was always ready with wild eyes and a rebuttal before she could finish her thought. This made Sharon feel ignored, and soon she started dating other men. Ted loses out at work for the same reason. His inability to listen to others makes him unpopular with many of the people he most admires.

These smart, well-intentioned people struggle in their attempt to connect with others. The sad thing is that they are unaware of the nonverbal messages they communicate.

[Read: Tips for Building a Healthy Relationship]

If you want to communicate effectively, avoid misunderstandings, and enjoy solid, trusting relationships both socially and professionally, it’s important to understand how to use and interpret body language and improve your nonverbal communication skills.

Find your space for healing and growth

Regain is an online couples counseling service. Whether you’re facing problems with communication, intimacy, or trust, Regain’s licensed, accredited therapists can help you improve your relationship.

Nonverbal communication is a rapidly flowing back-and-forth process that requires your full focus on the moment-to-moment experience. If you’re planning what you’re going to say next, checking your phone, or thinking about something else, you’re almost certain to miss nonverbal cues and not fully understand the subtleties of what’s being communicated.

As well as being fully present, you can improve how you communicate nonverbally by learning to manage stress and developing your emotional awareness.

Stress compromises your ability to communicate. When you’re stressed out, you’re more likely to misread other people, send confusing or off-putting nonverbal signals, and lapse into unhealthy knee-jerk patterns of behavior. And remember: emotions are contagious. If you are upset, it is very likely to make others upset, thus making a bad situation worse.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by stress, take a time out. Take a moment to calm down before you jump back into the conversation. Once you’ve regained your emotional equilibrium, you’ll feel better equipped to deal with the situation in a positive way.

The fastest and surest way to calm yourself and manage stress in the moment is to employ your senses—what you see, hear, smell, taste, and touch—or through a soothing movement. By viewing a photo of your child or pet, smelling a favorite scent, listening to a certain piece of music, or squeezing a stress ball, for example, you can quickly relax and refocus. Since everyone responds differently, you may need to experiment to find the sensory experience that works best for you.

In order to send accurate nonverbal cues, you need to be aware of your emotions and how they influence you. You also need to be able to recognize the emotions of others and the true feelings behind the cues they are sending. This is where emotional awareness comes in.

[Read: Improving Emotional Intelligence (EQ)]

Being emotionally aware enables you to:

• Accurately read other people, including the emotions they’re feeling and the unspoken messages they’re sending.
• Create trust in relationships by sending nonverbal signals that match up with your words.
• Respond in ways that show others that you understand and care.

Many of us are disconnected from our emotions—especially strong emotions such as anger, sadness, fear—because we’ve been taught to try to shut off our feelings. But while you can deny or numb your feelings, you can’t eliminate them. They’re still there and they’re still affecting your behavior. By developing your emotional awareness and connecting with even the unpleasant emotions, though, you’ll gain greater control over how you think and act. To start developing your emotional awareness, practice the mindfulness meditation in HelpGuide’s free Emotional Intelligence Toolkit .

Once you’ve developed your abilities to manage stress and recognize emotions, you’ll start to become better at reading the nonverbal signals sent by others. It’s also important to:

Pay attention to inconsistencies. Nonverbal communication should reinforce what is being said. Is the person saying one thing, but their body language conveying something else? For example, are they telling you “yes” while shaking their head no?

Look at nonverbal communication signals as a group. Don’t read too much into a single gesture or nonverbal cue. Consider all of the nonverbal signals you are receiving, from eye contact to tone of voice and body language. Taken together, are their nonverbal cues consistent—or inconsistent—with what their words are saying?

Trust your instincts. Don’t dismiss your gut feelings. If you get the sense that someone isn’t being honest or that something isn’t adding up, you may be picking up on a mismatch between verbal and nonverbal cues.

Evaluating body language and nonverbal signals

Eye contact – Is the person making eye contact? If so, is it overly intense or just right?

Facial expression – What is their face showing? Is it masklike and unexpressive, or emotionally present and filled with interest?

Tone of voice – Does the person’s voice project warmth, confidence, and interest, or is it strained and blocked?

Posture and gesture – Is their body relaxed or stiff and immobile? Are their shoulders tense and raised, or relaxed?

Touch – Is there any physical contact? Is it appropriate to the situation? Does it make you feel uncomfortable?

Intensity – Does the person seem flat, cool, and disinterested, or over-the-top and melodramatic?

Timing and place – Is there an easy flow of information back and forth? Do nonverbal responses come too quickly or too slowly?

Sounds – Do you hear sounds that indicate interest, caring or concern from the person?

More Information

• Take Control of Your Nonverbal Communication (video) - How to notice and use body language. (Harvard Business Review)
• Herrando, C., & Constantinides, E. (2021). Emotional Contagion: A Brief Overview and Future Directions. Frontiers in Psychology , 12 , 712606. Link
• How to Use All 5 Senses to Beat Stress | Psychology Today . (n.d.). Retrieved July 28, 2022, from Link
• Wertheim, E., 2008.  The Importance of Effective Communication . Retrieved July 28, 2022, from Link
• Segal, Jeanne. The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationships (McGraw-Hill, 2008) Link
• De Stefani, Elisa, and Doriana De Marco. “Language, Gesture, and Emotional Communication: An Embodied View of Social Interaction.” Frontiers in Psychology 10 (September 24, 2019): 2063. Link
• Nonverbal Communications . (n.d.). Retrieved July 28, 2022, from Link

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New Research: Nonverbal Communication Opportunities and Pitfalls

Xiao-Ping Chen explores the environmental cues we rely on to understand each other

At the University of Washington Foster School of Business , Professor Xiao-Ping Chen listens to what isn’t being said. Her research highlights the importance of nonverbal communication, which can be especially challenging across cultures.

In her new book, What Isn’t Being Said: Culture and Communication at Work , Chen refers to nonverbal communication as “ a secret code ” that is essential to master. Together with her co-authors, Chen explores the context of nonverbal communication cues and shares valuable takeaways for anyone navigating business communication.

Nonverbal communication cues in the workplace

“Nonverbal communication matters,” explains Chen. “The information in your message is important, but the context of how you deliver the message may be even more critical.”

“Leaders communicate nonverbally in many ways,” Chen continues. “Consider their body language, whether they show up on time, and if they smile and shake hands. These nonverbal communication forms can impact how their message is received, not to mention performance.”

What Isn’t Being Said: Culture and Communication at Work explores the environmental cues we rely on to understand each other. Chen describes each as a layer that forms your nonverbal communication style:

• Message context: Is your message direct or indirect? Is it simple or subtle?
• Relationship context: Do you adapt your style to the people you’re communicating with?
• Time context: Do you strictly stick to a schedule throughout the day, or do you allow flexibility to make time for others?
• Space context: What facial expressions and body language do you use? How do you occupy the physical space around you?

Chen explains that there is risk in assuming someone is quiet because they have nothing to contribute, “Your business colleague may be quiet because you haven’t invited them to speak and they don’t want to give offense. For them, it would be inappropriate to interject or interrupt. Alternatively, your take-charge attitude could be perceived as rude by others.”

Teaching nonverbal communication in the MBA classroom

In the Foster MBA classroom , Chen brings her research into nonverbal communication to life.

“In my MBA class, I create scenarios in which different teams must interact with each other using assigned communication styles,” she explains. “We ask students to role-play an executive team either from an alpha culture or a beta culture that has very different nonverbal communication styles. They don’t get to choose. We mimic the experience of collective negotiation between the alpha team and beta team. Almost always, there are disagreements and misunderstandings, even though the project is fabricated. We then step back and explore what went wrong, and where we misread nonverbal cues. It’s an eye-opener.”

Chen’s advice to managers, no matter where they do business, is to:

1. Be prepared to be flexible and adapt your communication style to that of your team; watch and learn.

2. Practice active listening and build time for listening to others into meetings. Pay attention to who isn’t speaking and give them designated time to voice.

Foster MBA students carry these lessons forward into careers spanning the globe. Recently, one Foster MBA grad reached out to Chen to share their experience.

“A former Foster MBA student applied this experiential learning project in business,” Chen recalls. “He was meeting a client from Japan. Their business relationship was difficult and tense. Before the meeting, he was nervous and thought hard about how he would conduct the meeting. Then he remembered his role in the beta team where they behaved collectively, unemotionally, politely and patiently, exchanging pleasantries before talking business. Although at the time he felt uncomfortable playing the role, it became a lightbulb moment! So, he began the meeting by asking his client about his trip and hotel stay, and about his family and community. He listened. They spent 20 minutes connecting and then segued into the deal. Not only did this approach smooth over tensions, it resulted in an agreement that met both party’s needs.”

About Xiao-Ping Chen

Xiao-Ping Chen is Philip M. Condit Endowed Chair and Professor of Management in the Foster School of Business. She is an elected Fellow of the Academy of Management (AOM), American Psychological Association (APA), and Society for Industrial and Organizational Psychology (SIOP). Chen is Editor-in-Chief of Management and Organization Review , the flagship journal of the International Association for Chinese Management Research (IACMR). She is also the founding editor and current Executive Editor of Management Insights , a bilingual (Chinese and English) magazine for business educators and practitioners. Chen’s research interests include cooperation and competition in social dilemmas, teamwork and leadership, entrepreneur passion, Chinese guanxi, and cross-cultural communication and management.

What Isn’t Being Said: Culture and Communication at Work by Wendi L. Adair, Nancy R. Buchan, Xiao-Ping Chen, and Leigh Anne Liu is part of the Springer Series in Emerging Cultural Perspectives in Work, Organizational, and Personnel Studies.

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Non-Verbal Communication: A Personal Case

Good communication is a very important thing that makes your friendships, both personal and professional or relationships successful. The most important thing in communications is clear speech. The more you are in your speech, the better people will respond to you and understand (Linder 12a). Non-verbal communication is an essential type of communication. Majority of our communication is much more than words. Non-verbal communication consists of facial expressions, gestures, eye contact, posture and tone of voice. If you are able to understand non-verbal communications, then you will connect better with friends, colleagues and family members (Non-verbal communication skills 1). Successful listening in communication involves the entire body; it helps with posture, eye contact, leaning forward towards speaker and nodding in acknowledgment (Linder 8b) My first conversation was with my boyfriend Richard at a restaurant having dinner; it lasted for almost three hours. I have known and dated Richard more than five years. That was a conversation that I was very comfortable holding. The second conversation was with my school headmaster. I was a class representative, so I was the one helping him organize a school trip. We were trying to decide where the class might enjoy going; it lasted approximately 30 minutes because I was so quick to tell him where they will enjoy and why. And I left his office.

The amazing conversation with my boyfriend Richard was very comfortable talking about. The conversation was very relaxing, so was my posture. I leaned a little bit forward to show my interest. I kept clear eye contact, which showed that I was very much interested. I was blushing the whole time we talked about how we met. When it was my time to talk, I realized that I used my hands the whole time. I was waving them aimlessly because of the excitement; when he would talk to me, I nodded my head to show that I am very much interested with what he has to say to me. My concentration level was very high at that moment. If at all I was to meet with someone out there asking me what conversation I had with my boyfriend, I would tell them every single thing. I found myself to have seated very calmly without moving, just so I can hear everything he tells me. My non-verbal behaviors were very much appropriate for the conversations. That was more of comforting, soothing and calming talk between a lovely couple who are having dinner.

The second conversation was with the headmaster. It hardly lasted 30 minutes worth of a conversation, because I was uneasy and unable to keep eye contact. When I entered his office, I sat down across his chair. I was slightly sweating, my heart beat was fast and was shaking. I sat down, leaned back and started staring at different things in the office. I am usually one of those people who always use hand gestures while talking, but that day my hands were settling on my laps. I did my best to finish the conversation really fast since I was not very comfortable in there. I found myself switching seating position after two minutes. If u asked me all the things he had told me in there after I left, I couldn’t have told you anything because I wasn’t remembering. I think he realized that I was very nervous and uncomfortable until he tried to make a joke, but I really did not laugh the way I would when with friends. I finally left the office and was back to normal once again.

I recognized that I have better non-verbal skills in a more relaxed environment, than in my headmaster’s office. I need to reduce on the hand gestures a little bit. The talk with the headmaster, my hands were unable to move, so I just fidgeting with them under the oak table. The conversation held with my boyfriend, I kept on cutting him short all the time; but with the headmaster, I usually waited for him to finish the conversation so that I can talk. If only I could adapt to keeping eye contact, leaning a little forward to show some interest and loosen up my body with the headmaster, we could have come up with a better conclusion on where to go for the school trip. The casual conversation was very much interesting and didn’t feel out of place compared to the headmaster’s office. My body movements while in the office with the headmaster was very shaky, but with my boyfriend, I was so still so that nothing can pass me by.

So far so good, I think I should learn how to hold formal discussions, because in places like job interview for new jobs, you need to have a constant eye contact with the interviewer. I totally know that my non-verbal skills are great, but maybe I should slow down on the hand gestures. For me to be a great communicator I need to find a balance between those two boundaries. I should find an elderly person who is close to me, like my mother, to help me. We should be practicing holding important talks with her, until I get used to holding conversations with people like you boss or headmaster. That will help me be a great communicator.

Belmonte, Joelle. Nonverbal Communication Skills: The power of Nonverbal communication and Body Language. HelpGiude.

Linder, Joan . Study Unit: Interpersonal Communcation. 1991a.

Linder, Joan. Graded Project: Interpersonal Communication. 1991b.

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Verbal and Nonverbal Communication

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Communication and Its Importance in Everyday Life Essay

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The concept of communication is primarily about exchanging various types of information between the subjects of communication. Even at the origins of sociality, the formation of community, and interaction, like communication, played a significant role. In the modern world, technologies and, consequently, the technological development of communications have begun to play an important role. The achievement of people’s understanding of one another is in many ways a condition for the development of both society and an individual.

A person’s need for communication is determined by natural life and constant presence in society, whether a family, a team of employees, a school, or a student class. If a person were deprived of an opportunity to communicate from birth, one would never grow up as a social person, civilized and culturally developed. Simply put, communication is the interaction of people in the process of their joint activities. It is the exchange of ideas, opinions, thoughts, feelings, the exchange of information (Flanagin, 2017). Without communications, no organizational group of people can exist.

The most critical components of communication are verbal and non-verbal communication. Verbal communication is the transmission of information through spoken words and is necessary to convey information content. Non-verbal communication is a form of communication, including gestures, facial expressions, poses, eye contact, touch (Bambaeeroo, & Shokrpour, 2017). Verbal communication is the universal means of communication since when transmitting information using speech, the message’s meaning is least lost. As for non-verbal communication, the most popular non-verbal communication tools are gestures and facial expressions. Verbal communication is not always able to convey the emotional component of information, and this ability differs in different “sound” languages (Bambaeeroo & Shokrpour, 2017). Additional ways of non-verbal communication are poses, as well as touching. Such gestures can also tell much about person’s thoughts and attitude to what is happening.

Communication in itself is one of the main attributes of human activity. All means are essential: both verbal communication and non-verbal communication. Each means expresses its “share” of information, and the ability to read different “codes” helps assess the situation as a whole. Extra-verbal communication, in particular, becomes necessary when verbal mutual understanding is impossible. For example, if the interlocutors speak different languages or one of them is deaf and dumb. It is noted that a person perceives the most significant part of the information through non-verbal communication, and the least – with the help of spoken speech.

The factor of understanding plays an essential role in the conditions of interpersonal communication. In psychology, understanding is considered, first of all, as the ability to comprehend the meaning or meaning of something and a result achieved due to this. Barriers to misunderstanding arose when the information that the communicator was trying to convey was misunderstood for some reason. Misunderstanding can be caused by too quiet or too fast speech, cultural characteristics, features of a particular language. Misunderstanding can also be caused by the emotional experiences of the communication participants when one takes out negative emotions on the other. Thus, the developed skills of verbal and non-verbal communication play a huge role in a person’s life. Effective and pleasant communication is possible only if there is understanding and respect of the interlocutor.

Bambaeeroo, F., & Shokrpour, N. (2017). The impact of the teachers’ non-verbal communication on success in teaching. Journal of Advances in Medical Education & Professionalism , 5 (2), 51.

Flanagin, A. J. (2017). Online social influence and the convergence of mass and interpersonal communication. Human Communication Research , 43 (4), 450-463. Web.

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IvyPanda . (2022) 'Communication and Its Importance in Everyday Life'. 27 October.

IvyPanda . 2022. "Communication and Its Importance in Everyday Life." October 27, 2022. https://ivypanda.com/essays/communication-and-its-importance-in-everyday-life/.

1. IvyPanda . "Communication and Its Importance in Everyday Life." October 27, 2022. https://ivypanda.com/essays/communication-and-its-importance-in-everyday-life/.

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IvyPanda . "Communication and Its Importance in Everyday Life." October 27, 2022. https://ivypanda.com/essays/communication-and-its-importance-in-everyday-life/.