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Medical School Personal Statement Editing

- be memorable. get accepted. -, unbiased essay editing.

Our diverse team of 50+ editors provide personalized, unbiased, and honest reviews. Each editor brings something different to the table that is guaranteed to enhance your essays and give you that edge. 

Medical School Masters

Our rigorous application/screening process leaves us with only the finest core editing team of medical students and physicians. Reviewing countless essays has allowed us to identify the patterns that make certain students more memorable and competitive.

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We know what it’s like living on a pre-med budget, which is why we refuse to charge the outrageous prices other companies are charging ($300-$1K for a single essay review). Help us change the game and continue our mission by not letting our fair prices distract you from the superior quality of our services.

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Dr. michael cellini.

Accepted Medical School Applicant

Dr. precious anyaoha, find your perfect essay review package, we will help to craft your best personal statement, extracurricular essays, secondary essays, or all of the above, ultimate acceptance package, all-in-one application cycle solution.

• Unlimited Personal Statement Reviews
• Unlimited Activities Description Reviews
• Unlimited Messaging w/ Editors and Advisors
• CASPer Prep (Or Additional Mock Interview)
• Secondary Application Reviews
• Mock Interview
• Admissions Advising

Personal Statement Reviews

• Advice from Admissions Committee Members
• Custom Feedback & Recommendations
• 48-72 Hour Turnaround
• Complete Analysis of content/voice/tone

Packages starting at $120

Not sure which package is best for you, text or call becca at: 917-994-0765, activities reviews, secondary reviews, packages starting at $119.99, interested in seeing the quality of our personal statement editing, meet some of your editors.

Ansel N., MD,PhD

The ohio state university college of medicine.

Alexa S., MD

University of Cincinnati College of Medicine

Harvard Medical School

Yale School of Medicine

George Washington School of Medicine

DUKE UNIVERSITY SCHOOL OF MEDICINE

NYU Grossman School of Medicine

Columbia University Vagelos College of Physicians and Surgeons

University of California San Francisco School of Medicine

Most frequent questions and answers about our services.

Our carefully-selected editing team is currently made up of physicians and medical students who have completed our rigorous screening, application, and training process.  Some of our editors have either sat on admissions committees or have contributed in some capacity to admissions at their school.  It’s critical for your essays to be viewed from multiple different perspectives, so we make it a priority to have a very diverse team of editors.

This number is based off of the number of applicants who got back to us saying whether or not they were accepted into at least one medical school.

In order to be an editor for Motivate MD, the person needs to check off two boxes. 1. They were accepted and currently attend or graduated from medical school. 2. They have an expertise for English writing.  Both a medical student and physician can check off those boxes. We strongly believe that just because someone is a physician does not mean they are qualified to review essays.

That being said, we do have a few physicians a part of our team who are extremely talented. We primarily like to have medical students be editors for one simple reason: They are closer to the medical school application process.

This can vary depending on the time of the year (there is a huge influx of essays from late May through August), but we always have a team goal to get reviews back to people within 48 hours. We have a guarantee of a 2-3 day turnaround. We strive for timely delivery, however, quality and effectiveness are our main priorities.

After you purchase a review package, you will get an email with what the next steps are. All drafts and reviews are sent via email.

You will receive a confirmation email for your purchase (check your trash/spam folders, if you don’t see it after a day) that outlines the immediate next steps in our review process. 

The short answer is no.  Although we started by reviewing only medical school application essays, we have been able to cater our editing secrets to make any essay memorable. 

We have helped those applying to medical residencies, PA school, dental school, nursing school, and grad/law school create very effective and unique essays.  Just give us any information you can during the checkout process to help us optimize our reviews to fit your specific situation!

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Ansel N., MD/PhD

Radiation Oncology Resident Former Medical School: Ohio State

My name is Ansel Nalin. I am a current Radiation Oncology resident at MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, TX. I graduated from the Ohio State University College of Medicine MD/PhD program.

While in medical school, I tutored first- and second-year medical students, helping them review lecture material and prepare for block exams. I taught study strategies to first-year students adjusting to the medical school curriculum. I worked individually with students during board exam preparation. I also led a review course for MD/PhD students prior to taking Step 1. In addition to my role as a tutor, I was also selected by the Ohio State College of Medicine Academic Office staff to serve in a leadership role for two years. In this role I led the team of 40 students on the peer tutoring team. I met weekly with College of Medicine staff to plan academic programs benefitting first- and second-year medical students. Together we organized and managed academic resources for medical students including our peer tutoring programs, group review sessions, and student-led review lectures. I coordinated the tutoring assignments for medical students involved in the program; over 100 students utilized the programs. We oversaw the creation of new student-led anatomy review sessions that were incorporated into the medical school academic program.

While enrolled in the MD/PhD program, I completed my PhD in cancer immunology studying natural killer cell development. I also collaborated on translational research projects seeking to identify new cell-based therapies for cancer. I published multiple papers in high impact journals and had the opportunity to present my work at both local and international conferences. I continue to pursue research that develops immune-based therapies for cancer and plan to pursue a career as a physician-scientist.

I joined the team at Motivate MD to help students achieve their goals in medicine. I have benefitted from the support of many outstanding mentors, and I strive to have a similarly positive impact in helping students succeed. My experiences as a tutor and teaching assistant, in both undergraduate and medical school, have helped me develop excellent skills in communication and mentoring. In addition to my teaching and leadership experience, I have developed specific skills to help students with the application and interview process for medical school and residency programs.

Not only am I familiar with what makes a strong application, I am prepared to help students highlight their strengths in their essays and interviews. I have extensive writing and speaking experience from my graduate studies. I have coached other students in communicating effectively. From my own experience in interviewing for medical school and residency, I can help students gain confidence in their communication skills and clearly express their motivations and goals. As a member of the Motivate MD team, I am passionate about helping students work toward their goal of a successful career in medicine.

I am an OBGYN resident and graduate of the University of Cincinnati. Throughout medical school, I engaged in research at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital and UCCOM’s OBGYN department. I have a strong background in mentorship. In medical school, I was a part of an organization that would mentor local Cincinnati youths. I was also involved in mentoring medical students in the years below through her medical scholar’s program. I also have a lot of experience editing medical school essays and mentoring my scribes when I was a chief scribe during my gap years. I took two years off prior to applying for medical school. During this time, I completed research at WashU with a neuroimaging lab as a clinical research coordinator and scribed in an emergency department. The medical application process was daunting for me. I went through the process of taking the MCAT multiple times and struggled to figure out where I would be a competitive applicant. I chose to work for Motivate MD to assist students with this intimidating process and help in areas where I felt I was lacking guidance prior to medical school! I am very excited to get the opportunity to work with you!

Jisoo is a medical student at Harvard Medical School. She has a background in neurobiology wet-lab research, and has a strong interest in mentorship, especially of underserved populations. Everyone has a unique journey to medical school, and Jisoo is committed to helping applicants present their own unique journeys in a meaningful and comprehensive manner. She has lots of experience working with individuals that have diverse pathways to medical school and closely collaborates with applicants from the beginning to the end of their application process, providing individualized support for each applicant.

Hi! My name is Rhys (pronounced like “Reese’s Pieces”) and I am a medical student at Yale School of Medicine.

I have upwards of 9 years experience mentoring peers, most recently aiding students through the premedical path at my undergrad. I also have worked as an executive function/planning tutor for Los Angeles area high school and college students. Earlier in college, I worked as a research aide/teaching assistant helping students leverage “writing-to-learn” in order to improve their understanding of complex concepts.

After graduating  Summa Cum Laude  with a Bachelors of Science in Biomedical Engineering and Health Policy from the University of Southern California in 2021, I took a gap year primarily to scribe at a pediatric clinic to boost my clinical experience hours and to continue to work on a philanthropic start-up I co-founded while at USC.

At USC, I had multiple research experiences ranging from biomedical device research in a hybrid wet lab to policy analysis. I also was heavily involved in pro-bono consulting for non-profits and social enterprises.

I have personal experience approaching the common “Why Medicine?” question from a non-traditional angle (engineering major/activities and low clinical hours compared to non-clinical), tying in a non-standard major “X factor” extracurricular into the overall theme of an application, and expressing interest in dual degrees/interdisciplinary medical careers (policy, public health etc).

I look forward to helping you plan for and execute your unique path to medical school!

George Washington School of Medicine and Health Sciences

Hi Everyone! My name is Anthu Gnanakumar and I am a medical student at the George Washington School of Medicine and Health Sciences. I majored in neuroscience and minored in English at the University of Virginia prior to taking a gap year and attending medical school. During my gap year, I worked as a medical assistant (MA) at endocrinology and pediatric primary care practices. I really value the hands-on experience I got through being an MA and would highly recommend taking a gap year if you are at all considering it!

I remember being daunted by the significant uptick in medical school applications during the pandemic and can empathize with the ever-increasing competitiveness of getting into medical school. I have mentored and advised multiple peers and friends from high school and college as they navigated the application process and look forward to extending that mentorship to many of you. It is my hope that we can work together to shape your narrative into meaningful essays and interview responses!

Duke University School of Medicine

Hi all! My name is Arthi and I’m a medical student at Duke. I am originally from New Jersey and went to Duke for undergrad where I was able to discover interests in medical humanities, global health, and peer mentorship. Having previously taught in an art studio, I found ways to engage with medical humanities through storytelling and creative arts with elders with dementia. In medical school, I help run a program that allows admitted patients to share their life story and with cartoon creations to simplify medical diagnoses. I also majored in global health and worked on projects in based in Uganda and India during undergrad that focused on studying how evidence-based interventions actually function in practice. I spent my gap year as a global health research assistant which allowed me to gain experience with all stages of project initiation, management, and dissemination. I’m working towards spending Duke’s MS3 research year engaging with global health implementation research on site. I don’t have any family in medicine so I asked for a lot of advice from upperclassmen and medical students throughout. I was a peer tutor for over 3 years and during my senior year, I started a peer advising program that’s goal was to reach beyond just academics. During that time, I mentored many premed students on course choice, finding research and volunteering experiences, applying to summer program and gap year jobs, MCAT, and building a school list. I continued many of these relationships since graduating and have been able to provide continued support through brainstorming and editing primary and secondary applications, interview prep, and ultimately decision making. One thing I’ve come to learn from my process and that my classmates is that there isn’t one right way to do things and it can be valuable to talk through and understand your priorities and the things that make you the most excited and craft your application around those. I know how stressful and draining each step of the application process can be and I would love the chance to provide some of guidance and support I received at whichever turn you need.

NYU Grossman School of Medicine Admissions Committee Experience

Hi! My name is Kate and I’m a current medical student at NYU Grossman School of Medicine in New York City! I’m originally from Kingsport, Tennessee and attended Clemson University where I completed my undergraduate degree in Chemical Engineering and a master’s degree in Applied Health Research. I have many years of experience as an advisor and mentor, mainly through working as study abroad ambassador and as a peer tutor and peer mentor through a Women in Engineering organization at my school. Later in college, I also worked as a teaching assistant for a challenging chemical engineering course in my degree. I also volunteered my time as a tour guide and was able to provide loads of advice and guidance to future students through that role. While finishing my master’s degree at Clemson University, I worked as a scribe at a gastroenterology clinic to boost my clinical experience hours. During this time, I also served as a mentor and health coach for a local volunteer organization with a mission to help people get off of government assistance. At Clemson, I had multiple research experiences ranging from social psychology to OB/GYN clinical research. I was also heavily involved with STEM outreach at local schools, ran a pitch competition, and volunteered as a conversational partner for international students who were learning English. I also spent the summer after I graduated college working at Interlochen Arts Camp as a camp counselor and reigniting my passion for theatre and the arts. I have had a slightly more non-traditional path to medicine (engineering degree/extracurriculars, taking a year to do a master’s, working at an arts camp), and I have a lot of experience in how to best weave together your own unique story in order to stand out to admissions committees. As a current medical student, I now spend my time working as an Admissions Ambassador and serving as a mentor to incoming students. I also currently interview for my medical school and so I can provide a lot of insight as I’ve sat on both sides of the Zoom interview screen. I look forward to helping you put your best foot forward in your applications and interviews for medical school!

Hello! I am a medical student at Columbia University Vagelos College of Physicians and Surgeons planning to apply into neurology this upcoming fall. I have extensive mentoring and advising experience both prior to medical school, when I served as a peer advisor for my undergraduate institution’s pre-health club, and as a medical student, continuing to advise undergraduates on essay writing, interview preparation, and general application and career advice. I also work as a mentor in the local community, tutoring and advising 8 th grade and high school age students interested in the health sciences. I have significant research and publication experience beginning as an undergraduate and continuing throughout medical school, having published four first-author manuscripts while contributing to multiple others. Prior to medical school, I spent a gap year as a National Institutes of Health Post-baccalaureate Intramural Research Training Award fellow, a role in which I studied Alzheimer’s disease proteomics and metabolomics. Currently, my research focus has shifted towards neuroinfectious diseases and contributions of infectious exposures to lifetime dementia risk. In addition to clinical medicine, I have a strong interest in public health and anthropology that informs my research and clinical pursuits. 

Hello! My name is Jessica, and I am a medical student at the University of California San Francisco School of Medicine. I completed my undergraduate degree in Molecular & Cellular Biology at Johns Hopkins University, along with a minor in Entrepreneurship & Management. At Hopkins, I played on the varsity tennis team, served as a peer tutor, and volunteered at the JHH Sickle Cell Infusion Center. After graduating from college, I took on a full-time position at the Sickle Cell Infusion Center as a clinical research coordinator. I stayed in this role for one gap year, where I ran the largest registry of sickle cell disease patients in the United States, helping to characterize disparities faced in health outcomes and access to care. Since starting medical school, I have become heavily involved in cervical cancer research, volunteering at the Chinese Hospital in downtown San Francisco, and advocating for vulnerable populations. As a first-generation medical student, I understand how overwhelming the application process is and how vital near-peer guidance can be. I’ve helped several applicants through their application writing and interview process, who will all be matriculating to medical school this upcoming fall. I look forward to helping you curate your own story, put your best foot forward, and pursue your dream career!

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By submitting my email address. i certify that i am 13 years of age or older, agree to recieve marketing email messages from the princeton review, and agree to terms of use., 15 tips for your medical school personal statement.

Don't underestimate the power of the medical school personal statement to make a strong, positive impression on an admissions committee. Combined with your interview performance, your personal statement can account for 60% (or more) of your total admissions score!

Medical schools want to enroll bright, empathetic, communicative people. Here's how to write a compelling med school personal statement that shows schools who you are and what you're capable of.

Personal Statement Topics

Your medical school personal statement is a component of your primary application submitted via, TMDSAS (for Texas applications), or AACOMAS (NB: If you are applying to medical school in Canada, confirm the application process with your school, as not all application components may be submitted through AMCAS).

These applications offer broad topics to consider, and many essay approaches are acceptable. For example, you could write about:

• an experience that challenged or changed your perspective about medicine
• a relationship with a mentor or another inspiring individual
• a challenging personal experience
• unique hardships, challenges, or obstacles that may have influenced your educational pursuits
• your motivation to seek a career in medicine

You'll write an additional essay (or two) when you submit secondary applications to individual schools. These essays require you to respond to a specific question. Admissions committees will review your entire application, so choose subject matter that complements your original essay .

Read More: Strategies for Secondary Applications

How to Write a Personal Statement for Medical School

Follow these personal statement tips to help the admissions committee better understand you as a candidate.

1. Write, re-write, let it sit, and write again!

Allow yourself 6 months of writing and revision to get your essay in submission-ready shape. This gives you the time to take your first pass, set your draft aside (for a minimum of 24 hours), review what you’ve written, and re-work your draft.

2. Stay focused.

Your personal statement should highlight interesting aspects of your journey—not tell your entire life story. Choose a theme, stick to it, and support it with specific examples.

3. Back off the cliches.

Loving science and wanting to help people might be your sincere passions, but they are also what everyone else is writing about. Instead, be personal and specific.

4. Find your unique angle.

What can you say about yourself that no one else can? Remember, everyone has trials, successes and failures. What's important and unique is how you reacted to those incidents. Bring your own voice and perspective to your personal statement to give it a truly memorable flavor. 

5. Be interesting.

Start with a “catch” that will create intrigue before launching into the story of who you are. Make the admissions committee want to read on!

6. Show don't tell.

Instead of telling the admissions committee about your unique qualities (like compassion, empathy, and organization), show them through the stories you tell about yourself. Don’t just say it—actually prove it.

7. Embrace the 5-point essay format.

Here's a trusty format that you can make your own:

• 1st paragraph: These four or five sentences should "catch" the reader's attention.
• 3-4 body paragraphs: Use these paragraphs to reveal who you are. Ideally, one of these paragraphs will reflect clinical understanding and one will reflect service.
• Concluding paragraph: The strongest conclusion reflects the beginning of your essay, gives a brief summary of you are, and ends with a challenge for the future.

8. Good writing is simple writing.

Good medical students—and good doctors—use clear, direct language. Your essays should not be a struggle to comprehend.

9. Be thoughtful about transitions.

Be sure to vary your sentence structure. You don’t want your essay to be boring! Pay attention to how your paragraphs connect to each other.

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Evaluate and improve your MCAT score.

10. Stick to the rules.

Watch your word count. That’s 5,300 characters (including spaces) for AMCAS applications, 5,000 characters for TMDSAS, and 4,500 characters for AACOMAS.

11. Stay on topic.

Rambling not only uses up your precious character limit, but it also causes confusion! Think about the three to five “sound bytes” you want admissions committee to know and remember you by.

12. Don't overdo it.

Beware of being too self-congratulatory or too self-deprecating.

13. Seek multiple opinions.

Before you hit “submit,” ask several people you trust for feedback on your personal statement. The more time you have spent writing your statement, the less likely you are to spot any errors. A professor or friend whose judgment and writing skills you trust is invaluable.

Read More: 12 Smart Tips for Your AMCAS Application

14. Double-check the details.

Always check for grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors. This goes for the rest of your application (like your activities list), too. A common oversight is referencing the wrong school in your statement! Give yourself (and your proofreaders) the time this task truly requires.

15. Consult the experts about your personal statement strategy.

Our med school admissions counselors can diagnose the “health” of your overall application, including your personal statement. Get expert help and guidance to write an effective personal statement that showcases not only your accomplishments, but your passion and your journey.

Want to get an edge over the crowd?

Our admissions experts know what it takes it get into med school. Get the customized strategy and guidance you need to help achieve your goals.

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Medical school personal statement editing services.

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Medical School Application Essay Hourly Plans

If you don't need comprehensive, start-to-finish assistance with your medical school personal statement editing, most meaningful experiences, or secondary essays, but need help perfecting a draft you already have, then we recommend our hourly plans. This way, you only pay for what you need.

Here’s how it works:

• Answered the question.
• Presented yourself distinctively.
• Organized your personal statements logically.
• Developed engaging openings and effective conclusions.
• Your consultant provides feedback and recommends ways to improve. You revise and then send the revised versions back.
• Edit the micro  - After your consultant checks the macro level, she focuses on the micro, specifically clarity, grammar, style, spelling, and word usage. She then sends you drafts with suggested corrections.
• Submit your awesome personal statements!

How much to buy? That depends on the number of drafts as well as the quality of your writing. You can  obtain a free estimate before purchasing  or use the estimate guidelines to purchase and proceed ASAP. 

How Many Hours Do I Need?

You can use the time you purchase for any hourly Accepted service including interview coaching and resume editing.

Choose How Many Hours You Want to Start:

Our rates provide prompt two-business-day turnaround.

Minimum purchase required

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Starting at $ 30 /mo with Affirm .

Have a question? Not sure how much time you need?

We Offer Complete Application Packages Too!

Boring but important stuff.

• All rates are expressed and billed in U.S. dollars.
• Our regular rates provide two-business-day turnaround for each round of editing. 
• Services are subject to availability.
• All prices are subject to change without notice.

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Medical School Essay & Personal Statement Editing Service

Become noticeable in the crowd of med school candidates by submitting a perfect application essay.

We Help to Make Your Essay for Medical School Stand Out

Med school admission essay is regarded as the most significant part of the admission process, and it’s no exaggeration. The medical personal statement is your opportunity to provide arguments and persuade the committee that your choice of the program is deliberate. What’s more, the application essay is a chance to show that you are a perfect candidate for entering a desired institution. So, everything should look perfect to increase your chances of success.

EssayEdge provides a variety of services. So, every client will find the most appropriate one, depending on the specific requirements. Whether you need expert proofreading or full assistance from brainstorming to the essay for medical school final submission, our editors are always ready to provide a helping hand.

Several pricing plans are available that enable the customers to select the best-fitting option depending on their needs. For instance, by choosing a Premier Package, you will get a brainstorming session, proofreading, e-mail interaction, and phone conversation with the chosen expert. Our medical editing service will also be useful even if you have perfect writing skills. It’s always a great idea to check whether your medical school admission essay is fully polished, isn’t it?

While working on your order, our specialists also consider the chosen university, program, and degree. Such a personalized approach helps to make your essays for medical school correspond to a particular university’s requirements. Additionally, most of our editors are former students of the Ivy League and other prestigious universities. So, they know for sure how it is to be in your shoes.

Our experts are aware of the specificity of the admission process, as application requirements and instructions can differ depending on the chosen educational institution. Thus, our professionals share info about entering different universities and share working tips to impress the admission committee and stand out from the rest of the applicants.

Expert Tips to Impress the Pickiest Committee

Together with medical school essay editing, our specialists provide expert recommendations and useful advice to improve your essay. Here are some tips from our editors to craft a successful med school application essay:

• Pay attention to the introduction and conclusion. An interesting hook at the beginning of the essay can help you attract the committee’s attention. Also, applicants often forget about the conclusion, which is the biggest mistake. A memorable concluding paragraph is one more opportunity to re-state why you are a perfect candidate and highlight your qualities and passion for applying for a medical school.
• Plan everything carefully. It is an effective strategy to craft the best essay for medical school admission. For instance, you can adhere to a step-by-step approach. Start with brainstorming and outline an essay. This way, it will be easier to ensure that you haven’t missed anything important.
• Highlight your best qualities. Emphasizing your unique personality is significant to stand out from the crowd. Moreover, it will show the committee that you know how to present yourself effectively. Remember that it’s not boasting of yourself. Instead, you provide necessary arguments supporting why you are a perfect candidate for the chosen program.
• Add details. Do not forget to mention real-life examples in your essay. For example, show how you demonstrated your qualities. Or you can tell the story describing the events that affected your personality development.
• Rely on your experience. Your skills, qualifications, academic background, and experiences are your main arguments. Of course, high grades and brilliant test scores are great. But the admission committee is searching for applicants who can implement their knowledge and qualities. Still, keep in mind that the mentioned experiences should be valuable and relevant.

Finally, do not forget to check everything before submitting because even a minor mistake can spoil the overall impression. With the professional medical personal statement help of our editors, you will be confident in the quality of your application essay for medical school.

Why Is Medical Editing Significant for Your Admission?

Professional medical school essay help is an excellent opportunity to make your paper the best version of itself. Our task is to help you highlight your personality and impress the committee. We work to help you get into the desired med school. Expert medical editing and proofreading service is not only about correcting mistakes. Here are the main benefits of using our service:

• Better grammar and punctuation;
• The improved tone of voice and word choice;
• Appropriate essay format and word count;
• Interesting and coherent narrative;
• Well-organized structure.

It’s important to mention that we do not produce any content related to the essay for medical school application. Our task is just to make the necessary improvements. The same refers to the content. Expert editing and proofreading do not harm your writing style. So, we will keep your unique voice and recommend ways to make it sound more professional.

Medical School Personal Statement Editing Service

The personal statement is the most important paper for your application to medical school. So, crafting a perfect essay is the key to entering the chosen institution. So, let’s make your personal statement brilliant together! Just place an order, and our editors will make your l admission paper neat, professional, and mistakes-free.

You can look through the med school admission essay samples to feel the difference and see how expert proofreading changes the way you perceive the essay for medical school. The same refers to the officers who will read your text—the better quality, the higher your chances of getting into the dream university.

Why We Are the Best Medical School Essay Editing Service

Legal Service

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Essay Mistakes to Avoid in Your Medical School Applications

Learn what should be avoided in essay writing, the most common med school essay mistakes and everything you need to know to correct them.

Avoid common essay mistakes in your med school applications

Part 1: Introduction

Part 2: the most common structural and narrative errors in medical school essays, part 3: the most common grammar mistakes in medical school essays.

There’s a famous Babe Ruth saying about how, sometimes, the fear of striking out can keep us from even trying.

It may be hard to imagine Babe Ruth has anything to do with medical school applications. But really, he was getting at an important universal truth.

Let’s apply this concept to writing your application essays. If you’re afraid of getting an essay wrong, it can be even harder to start writing than you originally thought.

On top of that, it can be intimidating to think about how there are so many ways to get an essay wrong and seemingly only a few ways to get it right. You have to juggle a lot when you’re writing. You have to tell your personal story while making it sound interesting to someone who knows very little about you.

As a premed student taking a ton of science classes, it can be easy to feel like you don’t have the training to write well. You might even feel like you’re simply a bad writer. On top of that, there is an inherently awkward feeling that you might just be the least interesting person in the world or that, in your effort to talk about your accomplishments, you’ll come across as arrogant. So, how do you get started without falling into the trap of so many possible mistakes?

Take some comfort in the fact that everyone makes mistakes—as much as that sounds like a generic platitude. The point is: Don’t aim for perfection the first time you sit down to write. Instead, remember that a lot of the errors you think are symptomatic of your inability to write are really just common mistakes you can prepare yourself to avoid or fix.

Sometimes, demystifying writing mistakes by confronting them head on and naming them can be a great start. We’re here to help with that.

In this guide, we’re going to walk you through the most common mistakes med school applicants make when they sit down to start writing. We’ll discuss the difference between macro- and micro-level problems—which is really just a fancy way of saying we’re going to talk about the big errors and the small errors. We’ll also show you some examples of what it looks like to get it wrong and then what it looks like to fix it.

Ultimately, you don’t have to be a grammar guru or the world’s next great essayist in order to write a successful med school application essay. Preparing for the writing process with a solid understanding of what to avoid is a great way to boost your confidence when you sit down to write.

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When we talk about macro-level errors, we’re usually referring to errors that have to do with the structure of your essay or the way you’re telling your story. These flaws are the ones that are going to make it especially hard to identify what you’re trying to convey to your reader. Here are the most common errors to watch out for.

Error 1: The Overdone Metaphor

Sometimes, in an effort to come up with a great hook–a catchy opening that will immediately get our readers’ attention– students will turn to a metaphor. They’ll wax poetic comparing their journey to medicine to the process of growing a garden or climbing a mountain or building a house. Throughout the rest of the essay, they’ll aim to put their creative potential on full display by drawing every point back to the central metaphor.

Why it’s a problem

Here’s where it gets tricky, though. Often once you find that metaphor and convince yourself of the great job you’re doing with it, you might write an essay where the metaphor overtakes the message you’re actually trying to convey. The boundaries between what has actually happened to you and what is a hypothetical metaphorical scenario becomes a little blurred.

This is a problem because the metaphor could distract your reader from the true emphasis. But it’s also going to distract you while you’re writing. You’re going to worry so much about carrying the metaphor throughout the essay that you’ll forget why you’re really writing. It’s also going to get in the way of the essay’s flow, installing a barrier between the reader and the writer, making it harder to connect with you as a person.

Example of an overdone metaphor

Take a look at this example of an overworked metaphor:

I was climbing up a mountain reveling in the cool crisp air and the snowy mountain peaks around me. The sunlight glittered off the snow like a bunch of hidden diamonds, encouraging me that somewhere on this long and difficult trek, a hidden treasure was waiting for me. The birds circled overhead and called out to me to keep going. Any moment, I thought, it would get easier to breathe and I would be at my destination.

So, what is this writer getting wrong? First of all, metaphors can easily transform into cliches if we don’t have a really clear idea of where we’re going.

Imagine the essay keeps going and the writer starts talking about all of the challenges they’ve faced on the way to medical school. Suddenly, we’ll recognize they’re trying to make something of a comparison to this difficult mountain trek and the harsh demands aspiring physicians can face in pursuit of their degree. The problem is, that metaphor is cliched and confusing. For example, did this writer climb an actual mountain? You can be an aspiring doctor and an avid mountain climber, after all. But then, if the writer did climb an actual mountain, which parts of the mountain-climbing story are embellished for the sake of the metaphor, and which are pure fact? Is there a real treasure, or just a figurative one?

Suddenly, your reader is going to be distracted by all of their questions. And this distraction is going to keep them from fully engaging with the purpose of your essay: to convince them you deserve a spot in medical school.

How to write instead

This doesn’t mean you can’t get creative with your opening. Take a look at how you might rework a metaphor like this to clarify the focus:

Sometimes I think of what it would be like to climb Mt. Everest. I imagine myself taking in the snowy mountain peaks, bundled up in so many warm layers I can hardly move. But I keep climbing upward toward the glittery slopes, the birds circling high overhead, and the reward that lay at the pinnacle of my journey. A stumble here and there is inevitable. And when weather, lack of supplies, or my own weaknesses upset my best-laid plans, I have to be flexible, consider all my options, and re-chart my course, always keeping my eye on the peaks ahead.

I ask myself how different it would be from the time I climbed Mt. Shasta as a freshman in college, or Snowdon in Wales last summer. I can’t say if I’ll ever actually scale Mt. Everest. But lately I’ve been thinking about my background climbing mountains and what this might also say about my passion for medicine. There is the need, in both, for resilience and perseverance. There is the commitment to lifelong learning. More than anything, however, there is my passion for problem-solving–whether in a clinic or on a mountain– with creativity and determination.

While it can sometimes still be a risky decision to open with something seemingly non-medical, this is a great example of confronting that risk head on. We understand that the writer is headed somewhere here. There is already much more specificity, providing us some insight into the writer’s personality rather than just an abstract scenario. And they really address the “So what?” question — in other words, why are we reading about mountain climbing? Well, because it tells us something about the writer and, more importantly, it tells us something about how they view their own journey toward a career in medicine.

Error 2: The Glorified Cover Letter

No one can fault you for being eager to share all that you’ve accomplished. This can be symptomatic of both anxiety and pride . Where this gets tricky is when you get lost in summary and don’t provide any insight into why this work was meaningful to you.

Example of a glorified cover letter

Take a look at this example:

As a junior in college, I decided to start my own community service group, organizing my classmates and traveling with them every week to read bedtime stories to children in the local hospital. As the founder of this group, I drafted a mission statement, coordinated with the hospital where we volunteered, and recruited volunteers. Together, we read a total of 115 books to 50 children over the course of one year, an accomplishment that I’m really proud of. I really enjoyed connecting with the patients and getting to know them, and I know my fellow classmates got a lot out of the experience, too.

You can imagine how a summary-based essay like this would continue. It’s true that this experience should probably be in the essay. The problem is, with a straight summary, we’re mostly repeating what will come elsewhere in the application–particularly your work and activities section. It’s also not especially engaging to read and it doesn’t offer any insight into why these experiences were meaningful for the writer.

How to write it instead

Now picture if we were to change it to something like this:

I’ll never forget the experience of reading one of my favorite books, A Wrinkle in Time, to a seven-year-old cancer patient named “Isaac.” He listened intently to every word, grinning when Mrs. Whatsit made a joke about being several centuries old, gasping when Meg and Charles Wallace finally found their missing father on a faraway planet, and always begging me to read “just one more chapter” when I came to the end of my hour-long visits.

On the day that we finally finished the book, his mother grabbed my hand and thanked me with tears in her eyes. “I feel like he can be a real kid when he’s listening to these stories,” she said.

When I founded my college community service club, traveling with a group of students to read bedtime stories to children in the local hospital, I knew I would learn about how to interact with a wide variety of patients. What I learned that day with Isaac and his mother, however, was how connected I want to be with patients and their families as a physician. Even more, I realized how much I will be responsible for addressing a patient’s emotional health, not just their physical health.

Here, the writer is talking about the same experience and including all of the crucial information we get in the first example. However, by zooming in on a particular moment within that experience, we get more insight into why it was meaningful and what the writer’s key takeaway was. Even better, they connect this experience to their goals in medicine. This approach allows the writer to display more of their own personality and values, making the essay more memorable.

Error 3: Falling into a Language Desert

Word choice might seem simple and easy enough to manage. But it’s actually something that’s easy to overlook, especially when it comes to repeating the same key words over and over again. Sometimes this is deliberate and we think it will just emphasize a set of central/critical ideas. Sometimes we do it because we’re just not paying attention. But the problem is that with too much repetition, the flow of your essay will start to suffer. It will also leave your reader wondering if you really know what you want to say.

Now, this doesn’t mean you need to write with a thesaurus at the ready or swap out every simple word with a complex one. You still want the essay to read naturally. But do keep an eye out for where you’re saying the same thing too often, and where this is starting to interfere with both clarity and specificity.

Example of a language desert

I want to work in healthcare because I’m drawn to how much healthcare requires you to understand health at an individual and community level. I want to be a doctor because medicine truly matters to me and bettering the health of my patients on an individual and community level will be meaningful to me.

There are a couple of different types of repetition here. First, the word, ‘healthcare’ is used over and over. If you read back through your paper (pro tip: read every draft out loud) and you notice you’re often repeating the same word, use this as a sign to play with your sentence structure so that you’re cutting out some of that repetition. There is also a repeated idea in the last sentence. The writer is talking about medicine mattering to them and they close the sentence the same way, albeit using different words. This finishes the idea right where we started and the reader is left wondering what the writer is actually trying to say.

Here’s an alternative to consider:

I’m passionate about becoming a doctor so that I can impact healthcare on both a community and individual level.

We’re saying the same thing as above with half the language. Not only will this help you navigate the pesky character count, but it will also help you provide some emphasis for your reader. Simplifying things allows the writer’s voice to come across as more authoritative and confident. Repetition isn’t always a bad thing. But rather than repeating the same keywords, look for narrative throughlines and point out repeated themes for your reader.

Error 4: The Vague Theme

Sometimes, we start writing before we actually know what to say. It’s a very common mistake to make. As a result, you can end up developing a vague theme that doesn’t convey anything memorable about your passion for medicine and why you want to become a doctor. Vague themes aren’t memorable, and they aren’t likely to convince your reader of your points, making it difficult to track the connection between an overarching goal and why you want to achieve it. Furthermore, it can be quite hard to write. Without a specific theme, you don’t really know what to emphasize within each body paragraph.

Example of a vague theme

I want to become a doctor so that I can enrich lives.

This is a valid goal. However, it’s a goal readers are going to see over and over again in application essays; it's too broad. For example, you could enrich lives by being a fantastic baker. A teacher. A painter. Why is medicine the right way for you to enrich lives? And what does it actually mean to enrich a life?

Take a look at this difference:

I want to become a doctor so that I can use my passion for problem-solving and creativity to empower patients to feel heard and encourage them to take an active role in their own well-being.

Take a look at all the keywords this writer has given themselves: creativity, problem-solver, empower, heard, encourage . Not only does this give readers a rich idea of the unique qualities this writer possesses, it also provides the writer with a blueprint they can use for the rest of their essay. They can now specifically write about moments that display their creativity, their problem-solving, and their effort to give patients a voice.

Error 5: Summarizing Your Whole Essay in Your Closing

Sometimes, upon reaching the closing paragraph, a couple of things happen. First, we realize we don’t know what else we actually want to say. Second, we start to convince ourselves that we need to remind our reader what we’ve already told them in order to really drive the point home.

This approach of summarizing your entire essay lacks nuance and disengages the reader. It makes the essay less memorable and will leave a reader questioning your ability to effectively reflect on your experiences.

Example of a summary-based closing

Take a look at what this writer came up with:

As mentioned above, all of my experiences thus far have taught me to value individualized care, teamwork, and determination in the face of challenges. My time as a scribe allowed me to view patient-doctor relationships unfolding firsthand, my time volunteering at the children’s hospital allowed me to utilize creativity to connect with patients, and my work leading a Medical Journal Book Club taught me to persevere when confronted with challenging concepts, collaborating with others to distill meaning. I know this will prepare me to succeed as a future physician.

Not only is this writer merely summarizing their essay, but they’re calling extra attention to it with the opening sentence. This immediately clues us in that they’ve already discussed these values and these experiences.

While reinforcing your points isn’t always a bad thing, there’s no need to simply remind your reader what you’ve already told them. Instead, think about leaving them with something new. Consider focusing on a specific image or moment that speaks to your central themes but you didn’t have a chance to use elsewhere in your essay. Alternatively, consider sharing a brand new perspective or insight on some of the experiences you’ve already shared earlier on.

Here’s how this writer is deploying that same strategy:

As I approach medical school, I’m grateful to have learned so much about what I hope to embody as a physician: creativity, determination, and an ability to collaborate in pursuit of individualized care. I know these goals will continue to evolve as I transition into a role as a medical student. For now, however, I’m reminded of something a patient at the community clinic told me at the end of a busy day volunteering. As I rushed from room to room trying to help the nurses restock supplies and provide patients with their printed out visit summaries, this particular patient asked me to slow down, saying: “I’m not just a number in your file. I’m a person.” I realized then how much it matters to make a patient feel heard, unique, and understood. My desire to provide every patient with this feeling will guide me as a future physician.

The writer is still managing to point out those key values present in the rest of their essay and use them as a jumping-off point rather than as their entire conclusion paragraph. They tell a new story that’s brief but that speaks to the values the writer has already expressed and the new values and goals they seem to be considering as a future medical student.

This is a far more engaging to read, and the description of a specific interaction with a patient provides readers with one final insight that will linger in their mind far longer than a dull summary.

Error 6: Absent Transition Statements

As you write, be careful that you’re not focusing so much on your paragraphs that you start to neglect how to arrive at those paragraphs. In other words, think about transition statements and how you are going to help your reader move from one idea to the next. Each paragraph should bring up a new idea that’s connected to the overarching message you’re trying to convey. If you don’t pay attention to this, the flow and readability of your essay will suffer, as it obstructs your reader’s ability to dwell on the experiences you’re writing about. Additionally, make sure you’re not using the same word or phrase at the start of several paragraphs ( “When I…” and “I am…” are two very commonly-used paragraph starters; try to change things up a little if you catch yourself using them more than just once or twice).

Example of an absent transition statement

Take a look at what two paragraphs with a missing transition statement look like:

Volunteering in India, I was struck by my new understanding of global healthcare. I realized that the accessibility of care I’d sometimes taken for granted in my native Canada had left me with a completely different understanding of healthcare than my grandparents.

As a scribe, I knew I could have the chance to engage in work treating a wide range of patients from the local community.

The writer is talking about two totally different experiences. This demonstrates variety within the essay, but the writer jumps from a reflection on their time in India to their time as a scribe. This sudden shift is disorienting for the reader, and it likely leaves them wondering what the experience of volunteering in India and being a scribe have to do with each other.

Did the writer volunteer as a scribe in India? Or did their experience in India lead them to pursue work as a scribe? What specific experience(s) and interaction(s) during their time in India brought them to the realization that they wanted pursue working as a scribe in order to engage with “a wide range of patients from the local community”?

We could change it to something like this:

Volunteering in India in the summer of 2022, I was struck by my new understanding of global healthcare. I realized that the accessibility of care I’d taken for granted in my native Canada had left me with a completely different understanding of healthcare than my grandparents.

Inspired by this revelation, the following summer I decided to pursue more work that would expand my understanding of how people from different communities engage with healthcare in unique ways. In pursuit of this goal, I started work as a scribe at XYZ, determined to work with a wide range of diverse patients.

Here, our reader is spending time reflecting a bit more on how two very different experiences might actually be linked. They also do a nice job of providing clarity on the chronology of these two events. As a result, the narrative flow is stronger and the essay is more effective.

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By now, you can probably see that even micro-level errors make a huge difference. Imagine a car whose engine works perfectly but the blinkers don’t flash or the wipers only clear half of the windshield. It’s going to be really tricky to successfully drive.

This is a good metaphor for the mechanics—or the grammar—in your writing. Though something like grammar might not feel as integral to the success of your writing as the anecdotes you’ve decided to include, it can still deeply impact the clarity of your essay. Incorrect grammar corrodes your essay, even if you’re telling the right stories.

Here are the biggest grammar questions and mistakes we see writers making.

Passive Vs. Active Voice

You’ve probably heard these terms a thousand times, but do you truly understand what they mean? Even more, why are they important?

When you’re using passive voice, the subject of the sentence is receiving the action. Here’s what that looks like:

Diabetes was shown by research to cause high stress in families and patients.

The little girl was kicked by a horse at a birthday party.

It was decided by my mother that I would go to boarding school.

Some of these may seem more awkward than others but they’re all problematic in the context of an application essay, since the meaning is unnecessarily obscured.

If we were to convert these sentences to active voice, however, they would look like this:

Research showed that diabetes was a cause of high stress in families and patients.

The horse kicked the little girl at a birthday party.

My mother decided I would go to boarding school.

The changes here are pretty simple. But the impact they have on sentence clarity is huge.

When we want to cut to the point really quickly, sometimes we search for an acronym. In other words:

CDC instead of Centers for Disease Control

WHO instead of World Health Organization

CPVMT instead of Central Pennsylvania Volunteer Medical Transportation

Acronyms are fine to use, but there’s a convention you should follow. The first time you bring up a term, spell it out completely, then put the acronym in parentheses after. For the remainder of the essay, any time you want to reference the organization, you can simply use the acronym without parentheses. This will give your reader time to understand the reference without you having to waste precious characters spelling the organization out every time you mention it.

So instead of saying:

While volunteering with VPSS, I learned how to collaborate in the pursuit of empathetic care. As a crucial resource for underserved patients, VPSS also taught me how support should be extended beyond the walls of a clinical environment.

While volunteering with the Volunteer Patient Social Support (VPSS), I learned how to collaborate in the pursuit of empathetic care. As a crucial resource for underserved patients, VPSS also taught me how support should be extended beyond the walls of a clinical environment.

The change may seem small, but it ensures you’re not going to confuse your reader or overly depersonalize your tone by jumping right into a series of letters with no inherent meaning to your reader.

Tense Agreement

When it comes to grammar, tense relates to the past, present, and future. It feels easy to distinguish these in life, but you’d be surprised how often tenses are swapped when writing. Often, this will happen when writers are trying to paint the scene of a particular experience. When a writer is unsure of how to navigate the details of what happened to them and provide a reflection on how it impacted them, they sometimes mix tenses. The overall clarity of an essay can suffer as a result, displaying a lack of precision and creating confusion for readers.

Here’s an example:

I am walking through the walls of the hospital, humming my favorite song, when I see a group of nurses rushing to a room to help with a code blue. I ran over and tried my best to help, but I was unsure what actual impact I could have in such a high stakes scenario.

This is a pretty subtle example so it’s easy to miss it. We start with the present tense, “I am walking,” and shift to the past halfway through the paragraph, “I ran.” A slip like this is distracting and, as such, takes the reader’s mind off of what the writer is trying to accomplish. Switching between tenses can be a stylistic decision, but it’s tricky to pull off in the space of one paragraph. And here, since we’re switching tenses within the same moment, it will be read as an error.

Instead, you would simplify this by making the tense uniform like so:

I was walking through the halls of the hospital, humming my favorite song, when I saw a group of nurses rushing to a room to help with a code blue. I ran over and tried my best to help, but I was unsure what actual impact I could have in such a high stakes scenario.

I am walking through the walls of the hospital, humming my favorite song, when I see a group of nurses rushing to a room to help with a code blue. I run over and try my best to help, but I am unsure what actual impact I can have in such a high stakes scenario.

Making sure the paragraph reads uniformly leads to consistency in your voice, which is the best way to ensure your reader stays engaged and is clear on what is happening.

When to use Me vs. Myself

Sometimes the desire to achieve sentence variety can result in the impulse to use “me” and “myself” (and even “I”) interchangeably. But they each have a distinct purpose.

Myself is what is known as a reflexive or stressed pronoun, meaning it should really only be used along with the subject pronoun “I.” In other words, the below examples are all correct:

I went to the grocery store by myself.

I did the job myself.

I bought myself a new house.

Whereas, this would not be correct:

The lab PI met with Henry and myself.

In contrast, me is an object pronoun. This means that it refers to the action of a verb. So the correct usage would be:

My mother wants me to eat more vegetables.

The professor wanted to speak with me and Alice.

A semicolon is meant to indicate a pause between two independent sentence clauses. Using it instead of a comma is a way to provide more emphasis or link two closely related ideas while maintaining the flow of a single sentence. Think of it as the halfway point between a comma and a period. Be careful not to use a semicolon and a comma interchangeably, as you don’t want a semicolon to interrupt a sentence.

For example, these semicolons are being deployed incorrectly:

My dog is sick so I know I need to take her to the vet; but I am afraid to take her to the vet because I worry about how I will feel if I get bad news.

In the lab I learned the importance of a number of key values; teamwork; perseverance; an open mind; and my passion for headache research.

Here, the semicolon is interrupting the flow of the sentence, making the structure unclear. It muddies the waters of where the emphasis falls. We would correct this as follows:

I know I need to take my dog to the vet because she’s been sick for two weeks; still, I’m afraid because I’m worried about getting bad news.

In the lab, I learned the importance of a number of key values; it was empowering to grow in my understanding of teamwork, perseverance, keeping an open mind, and how important headache research is to me.

Making these changes ensures flow, uniformity, and an authoritative voice.

One common mistake with semicolons comes when it’s time to make a list. Often, writers feel the impulse to use a semicolon to bring some pause into the list or to break up the length. For example, you might want to write:

At the store, I need to get bread; cheese; sugar; eggs; tofu.

However, when it comes to semicolons inside of lists, you really only want to use them if the listed items already include a comma. So, for example:

I need to buy bread, cheese, sugar, eggs, and tofu from the market next door; fish and oranges from the farmstand; and cereal, peanut butter, and lima beans from the grocery store.

Because each item within this list contains commas, semicolons help break up the items and make the sentence more readable.

When used correctly, quotations are a great way to introduce some narrative texture in your essay. Whether you’re quoting a line from a book, quoting a bit of dialogue, or quoting a thought, using a quotation can open up the space of the essay and show genuine effort to make a narrative for your reader.

Some of the easiest ways to get quotations wrong, however, are:

Overuse in an effort to create emphasis

I was eating the homemade “cookies” my mother baked so “wonderfully.”

We can see the writer is likely alluding to the sub-par quality of their mother’s cookies. However, the quotation marks bring in uncertainty as to what the writer is trying to say. Are there no cookies here? What else does the writer mean by wonderfully? We will automatically read an ironic tone into these quotations but is that what the author intends?

Using a ‘ instead of “

Writers will also sometimes use a ‘ instead of “. It’s best to only use a single quotation mark when quoting a line of dialogue within a line of dialogue. For example:

My cousin was telling me about his interaction with his coach. “I was walking to practice,” my cousin said, “and my coach pulled me aside. ‘Aaron, if you keep showing up late, you may get kicked off the team.’ What do you think I should do?”

Here, the single quotation mark is used to distinguish Aaron’s voice from the coach’s.

On a formal level, remember that quotation marks should not be used for the title of a book or journal. Instead, italicize these. Use quotation marks when you’re discussing an individual text, such as a single poem, a single song, or a single essay.

Dangling Modifiers

A dangling modifier refers to a word or phrase that modifies a word that’s not clearly defined in the sentence. Using these is a surefire way to confuse the reader and disrupt clarity and flow. For example:

Without remembering what the student’s name was, it was difficult to compliment the correct essay.

The reader will be confused by the ‘it.’ Who does ‘it’ refer to? Who is actually the subject of the sentence? The logical order of the sentence is also a little confusing. Instead, revise the sentence to look like this:

The professor forgot the student’s name, so it was difficult to compliment the correct essay.

Not only will this help with clarity, but it will also help with emphasis and intention.

Affect vs. Effect and Than vs. Then

We have probably all gotten this wrong at some point. They may seem like minor errors, but mistaking their use challenges our authority and our eye for detail.

Keep this rule of thumb in mind:

Affect should be considered a verb. It acts on something or produces a change. In other words:

The cold weather affected my father’s health.

The taste of his grandmother’s food deeply affected him.

In each of these cases, knowing that we can swap out “affect” with another verb (for example, The cold weather impacted my father’s health , or The taste of his grandmother’s food resonated with him deeply ) is a good sign we’re correctly using the term.

Effect meanwhile, usually refers to the result or the noun.

His rash was the effect of his allergic reaction.

In the case of than vs. then , remember that than indicates a comparison whereas then indicates something related to time.

For example, you would not say:

I lived in Colorado and than I moved to Florida.

And you would not say:

My brother is younger then me.

But you would say:

I lived in Colorado and then I moved to Florida.

And you would also say:

My brother is younger than me.

Details like these really matter in an essay, especially if we’ve put so much thought into the larger structure and narrative. So why not be extra sure we get them right?

Hyphens are a multi-use form of punctuation, and they can be extremely handy in lending some variation to your essay’s structure.

However, it’s important to know when they should be used, and when other forms of punctuation are more suitable.

Hyphens should be used in the following circumstances:

When writing out complex numbers such as twenty-five , ninety-nine, or one hundred and sixty-three. ( Note: only use a hyphen for numbers between twenty-one and ninety-nine). For example, you would write one hundred and twenty-one or one hundred and ninety-nine, but not one-hundred-twenty).

When joining two or more words to create a single adjective that describes a noun, such as the well-worn blue jeans. (Note: drop the hyphen if the noun comes first, as in the blue jeans are well worn).

When using prefixes and suffixes such as mid-, pre-, post-, pro-, anti-, etc.

When joining three or more words to make a complex compound word, such as son-in-law.

It’s worth also noting that hyphens (-) are different from em dashes (—). Em dashes are a versatile form of punctuation that can be used to emphasize a point or provide more detail and context to a sentence. As such, if you’re looking to vary your punctuation, you can replace a colon, semicolon, or parenthetical phrase with em dashes. For example:

If you want to use an em dash in place of a semicolon, it would look like this: I couldn’t believe what I was seeing — there were patients lining up in the streets just to access basic healthcare.

If you want to use an em dash in place of a colon, it would look like this: During my time as a hospital volunteer, I interacted with patients of all ages — babies, middle schoolers, parents, and grandparents.

If you want to use a pair of em dashes in place of a parenthetical phrase, it would look like this: As I prepared for my first day of shadowing — ironing my scrubs, gathering my notebook and pens, and triple-checking the route to the clinic — I wondered whether a young Dr. Feldman had once felt this way, too.

Final thoughts

It’s important to remember that you can’t edit nothing. In other words, don’t be so afraid of getting something wrong that you don’t even start. Writing well is a process and even the best writers make mistakes. However, for each error, there’s usually an easy fix.

Don’t think of this guide as something you must memorize before you write. Think of it as a tool you can use for revision to help you find your mistakes before they end up in your essays.

About the Author

Dr. Shirag Shemmassian is the Founder of Shemmassian Academic Consulting and one of the world's foremost experts on medical school admissions. For nearly 20 years, he and his team have helped thousands of students get into medical school using his exclusive approach.

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Section 8 of the AMCAS® Application: Essays

New section.

Here you will upload your Personal Comments essay.

• AMCAS® Sign In

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10 Successful Medical School Essays

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-- Accepted to: Harvard Medical School GPA: 4.0 MCAT: 522

Sponsored by A ccepted.com : Great stats don’t assure acceptance to elite medical schools. The personal statement, most meaningful activities, activity descriptions, secondaries and interviews can determine acceptance or rejection. Since 1994, Accepted.com has guided medical applicants just like you to present compelling medical school applications. Get Accepted !

I started writing in 8th grade when a friend showed me her poetry about self-discovery and finding a voice. I was captivated by the way she used language to bring her experiences to life. We began writing together in our free time, trying to better understand ourselves by putting a pen to paper and attempting to paint a picture with words. I felt my style shift over time as I grappled with challenges that seemed to defy language. My poems became unstructured narratives, where I would use stories of events happening around me to convey my thoughts and emotions. In one of my earliest pieces, I wrote about a local boy’s suicide to try to better understand my visceral response. I discussed my frustration with the teenage social hierarchy, reflecting upon my social interactions while exploring the harms of peer pressure.

In college, as I continued to experiment with this narrative form, I discovered medical narratives. I have read everything from Manheimer’s Bellevue to Gawande’s Checklist and from Nuland’s observations about the way we die, to Kalanithi’s struggle with his own decline. I even experimented with this approach recently, writing a piece about my grandfather’s emphysema. Writing allowed me to move beyond the content of our relationship and attempt to investigate the ways time and youth distort our memories of the ones we love. I have augmented these narrative excursions with a clinical bioethics internship. In working with an interdisciplinary team of ethics consultants, I have learned by doing by participating in care team meetings, synthesizing discussions and paths forward in patient charts, and contributing to an ongoing legislative debate addressing the challenges of end of life care. I have also seen the ways ineffective intra-team communication and inter-personal conflicts of beliefs can compromise patient care.

Writing allowed me to move beyond the content of our relationship and attempt to investigate the ways time and youth distort our memories of the ones we love.

By assessing these difficult situations from all relevant perspectives and working to integrate the knowledge I’ve gained from exploring narratives, I have begun to reflect upon the impact the humanities can have on medical care. In a world that has become increasingly data driven, where patients can so easily devolve into lists of numbers and be forced into algorithmic boxes in search of an exact diagnosis, my synergistic narrative and bioethical backgrounds have taught me the importance of considering the many dimensions of the human condition. I am driven to become a physician who deeply considers a patient’s goal of care and goals of life. I want to learn to build and lead patient care teams that are oriented toward fulfilling these goals, creating an environment where family and clinician conflict can be addressed efficiently and respectfully. Above all, I look forward to using these approaches to keep the person beneath my patients in focus at each stage of my medical training, as I begin the task of translating complex basic science into excellent clinical care.

In her essay for medical school, Morgan pitches herself as a future physician with an interdisciplinary approach, given her appreciation of how the humanities can enable her to better understand her patients. Her narrative takes the form of an origin story, showing how a childhood interest in poetry grew into a larger mindset to keep a patient’s humanity at the center of her approach to clinical care.

This narrative distinguishes Morgan as a candidate for medical school effectively, as she provides specific examples of how her passions intersect with medicine. She first discusses how she used poetry to process her emotional response to a local boy’s suicide and ties in concern about teenage mental health. Then, she discusses more philosophical questions she encountered through reading medical narratives, which demonstrates her direct interest in applying writing and the humanities to medicine. By making the connection from this larger theme to her own reflections on her grandfather, Morgan provides a personal insight that will give an admissions officer a window into her character. This demonstrates her empathy for her future patients and commitment to their care.

Her narrative takes the form of an origin story, showing how a childhood interest in poetry grew into a larger mindset to keep a patient's humanity at the center of her approach to clinical care.

Furthermore, it is important to note that Morgan’s essay does not repeat anything in-depth that would otherwise be on her resume. She makes a reference to her work in care team meetings through a clinical bioethics internship, but does not focus on this because there are other places on her application where this internship can be discussed. Instead, she offers a more reflection-based perspective on the internship that goes more in-depth than a resume or CV could. This enables her to explain the reasons for interdisciplinary approach to medicine with tangible examples that range from personal to professional experiences — an approach that presents her as a well-rounded candidate for medical school.

Disclaimer: With exception of the removal of identifying details, essays are reproduced as originally submitted in applications; any errors in submissions are maintained to preserve the integrity of the piece. The Crimson's news and opinion teams—including writers, editors, photographers, and designers—were not involved in the production of this article.

-- Accepted To: A medical school in New Jersey with a 3% acceptance rate. GPA: 3.80 MCAT: 502 and 504

Sponsored by E fiie Consulting Group : “ EFIIE ” boasts 100% match rate for all premedical and predental registered students. Not all students are accepted unto their pre-health student roster. Considered the most elite in the industry and assists from start to end – premed to residency. EFIIE is a one-stop-full-service education firm.

"To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded." – Ralph Waldo Emerson.

The tribulations I've overcome in my life have manifested in the compassion, curiosity, and courage that is embedded in my personality. Even a horrific mishap in my life has not changed my core beliefs and has only added fuel to my intense desire to become a doctor. My extensive service at an animal hospital, a harrowing personal experience, and volunteering as an EMT have increased my appreciation and admiration for the medical field.

At thirteen, I accompanied my father to the Park Home Animal Hospital with our eleven-year-old dog, Brendan. He was experiencing severe pain due to an osteosarcoma, which ultimately led to the difficult decision to put him to sleep. That experience brought to light many questions regarding the idea of what constitutes a "quality of life" for an animal and what importance "dignity" plays to an animal and how that differs from owner to owner and pet to pet. Noting my curiosity and my relative maturity in the matter, the owner of the animal hospital invited me to shadow the professional staff. Ten years later, I am still part of the team, having made the transition from volunteer to veterinarian technician. Saving a life, relieving pain, sharing in the euphoria of animal and owner reuniting after a procedure, to understanding the emotions of losing a loved one – my life was forever altered from the moment I stepped into that animal hospital.

As my appreciation for medical professionals continued to grow, a horrible accident created an indelible moment in my life. It was a warm summer day as I jumped onto a small boat captained by my grandfather. He was on his way to refill the boat's gas tank at the local marina, and as he pulled into the dock, I proceeded to make a dire mistake. As the line was thrown from the dock, I attempted to cleat the bowline prematurely, and some of the most intense pain I've ever felt in my life ensued.

Saving a life, relieving pain, sharing in the euphoria of animal and owner reuniting after a procedure, to understanding the emotions of losing a loved one – my life was forever altered from the moment I stepped into that animal hospital.

"Call 911!" I screamed, half-dazed as I witnessed blood gushing out of my open wounds, splashing onto the white fiberglass deck of the boat, forming a small puddle beneath my feet. I was instructed to raise my hand to reduce the bleeding, while someone wrapped an icy towel around the wound. The EMTs arrived shortly after and quickly drove me to an open field a short distance away, where a helicopter seemed to instantaneously appear.

The medevac landed on the roof of Stony Brook Hospital before I was expeditiously wheeled into the operating room for a seven-hour surgery to reattach my severed fingers. The distal phalanges of my 3rd and 4th fingers on my left hand had been torn off by the rope tightening on the cleat. I distinctly remember the chill from the cold metal table, the bright lights of the OR, and multiple doctors and nurses scurrying around. The skill and knowledge required to execute multiple skin graft surgeries were impressive and eye-opening. My shortened fingers often raise questions by others; however, they do not impair my self-confidence or physical abilities. The positive outcome of this trial was the realization of my intense desire to become a medical professional.

Despite being the patient, I was extremely impressed with the dedication, competence, and cohesiveness of the medical team. I felt proud to be a critical member of such a skilled group. To this day, I still cannot explain the dichotomy of experiencing being the patient, and concurrently one on the professional team, committed to saving the patient. Certainly, this experience was a defining part of my life and one of the key contributors to why I became an EMT and a volunteer member of the Sample Volunteer Ambulance Corps. The startling ring of the pager, whether it is to respond to an inebriated alcoholic who is emotionally distraught or to help bring breath to a pulseless person who has been pulled from the family swimming pool, I am committed to EMS. All of these events engender the same call to action and must be reacted to with the same seriousness, intensity, and magnanimity. It may be some routine matter or a dire emergency; this is a role filled with uncertainty and ambiguity, but that is how I choose to spend my days. My motives to become a physician are deeply seeded. They permeate my personality and emanate from my desire to respond to the needs of others. Through a traumatic personal event and my experiences as both a professional and volunteer, I have witnessed firsthand the power to heal the wounded and offer hope. Each person defines success in different ways. To know even one life has been improved by my actions affords me immense gratification and meaning. That is success to me and why I want to be a doctor.

This review is provided by EFIIE Consulting Group’s Pre-Health Senior Consultant Jude Chan

This student was a joy to work with — she was also the lowest MCAT profile I ever accepted onto my roster. At 504 on the second attempt (502 on her first) it would seem impossible and unlikely to most that she would be accepted into an allopathic medical school. Even for an osteopathic medical school this score could be too low. Additionally, the student’s GPA was considered competitive at 3.80, but it was from a lower ranked, less known college, so naturally most advisors would tell this student to go on and complete a master’s or postbaccalaureate program to show that she could manage upper level science classes. Further, she needed to retake the MCAT a third time.

However, I saw many other facets to this student’s history and life that spoke volumes about the type of student she was, and this was the positioning strategy I used for her file. Students who read her personal statement should know that acceptance is contingent on so much more than just an essay and MCAT score or GPA. Although many students have greater MCAT scores than 504 and higher GPAs than 3.80, I have helped students with lower scores and still maintained our 100% match rate. You are competing with thousands of candidates. Not every student out there requires our services and we are actually grateful that we can focus on a limited amount out of the tens of thousands that do. We are also here for the students who wish to focus on learning well the organic chemistry courses and physics courses and who want to focus on their research and shadowing opportunities rather than waste time deciphering the next step in this complex process. We tailor a pathway for each student dependent on their health care career goals, and our partnerships with non-profit organizations, hospitals, physicians and research labs allow our students to focus on what matters most — the building up of their basic science knowledge and their exposure to patients and patient care.

Students who read her personal statement should know that acceptance is contingent on so much more than just an essay and MCAT score or GPA.

Even students who believe that their struggle somehow disqualifies them from their dream career in health care can be redeemed if they are willing to work for it, just like this student with 502 and 504 MCAT scores. After our first consult, I saw a way to position her to still be accepted into an MD school in the US — I would not have recommended she register to our roster if I did not believe we could make a difference. Our rosters have a waitlist each semester, and it is in our best interest to be transparent with our students and protect our 100% record — something I consider a win-win. It is unethical to ever guarantee acceptance in admissions as we simply do not control these decisions. However, we respect it, play by the rules, and help our students stay one step ahead by creating an applicant profile that would be hard for the schools to ignore.

This may be the doctor I go to one day. Or the nurse or dentist my children or my grandchildren goes to one day. That is why it is much more than gaining acceptance — it is about properly matching the student to the best options for their education. Gaining an acceptance and being incapable of getting through the next 4 or 8 years (for my MD/PhD-MSTP students) is nonsensical.

-- Accepted To: Imperial College London UCAT Score: 2740 BMAT Score: 3.9, 5.4, 3.5A

My motivation to study Medicine stems from wishing to be a cog in the remarkable machine that is universal healthcare: a system which I saw first-hand when observing surgery in both the UK and Sri Lanka. Despite the differences in sanitation and technology, the universality of compassion became evident. When volunteering at OSCE training days, I spoke to many medical students, who emphasised the importance of a genuine interest in the sciences when studying Medicine. As such, I have kept myself informed of promising developments, such as the use of monoclonal antibodies in cancer therapy. After learning about the role of HeLa cells in the development of the polio vaccine in Biology, I read 'The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks' to find out more. Furthermore, I read that surface protein CD4 can be added to HeLa cells, allowing them to be infected with HIV, opening the possibility of these cells being used in HIV research to produce more life-changing drugs, such as pre-exposure prophylaxis (PreP). Following my BioGrad laboratory experience in HIV testing, and time collating data for research into inflammatory markers in lung cancer, I am also interested in pursuing a career in medical research. However, during a consultation between an ENT surgeon and a thyroid cancer patient, I learnt that practising medicine needs more than a scientific aptitude. As the surgeon explained that the cancer had metastasised to her liver, I watched him empathetically tailor his language for the patient - he avoided medical jargon and instead gave her time to come to terms with this. I have been developing my communication skills by volunteering weekly at care homes for 3 years, which has improved my ability to read body language and structure conversations to engage with the residents, most of whom have dementia.

However, during a consultation between an ENT surgeon and a thyroid cancer patient, I learnt that practising medicine needs more than a scientific aptitude.

Jude’s essay provides a very matter-of-fact account of their experience as a pre-medical student. However, they deepen this narrative by merging two distinct cultures through some common ground: a universality of compassion. Using clear, concise language and a logical succession of events — much like a doctor must follow when speaking to patients — Jude shows their motivation to go into the medical field.

From their OSCE training days to their school’s Science society, Jude connects their analytical perspective — learning about HeLa cells — to something that is relatable and human, such as a poor farmer’s notable contribution to science. This approach provides a gateway into their moral compass without having to explicitly state it, highlighting their fervent desire to learn how to interact and communicate with others when in a position of authority.

Using clear, concise language and a logical succession of events — much like a doctor must follow when speaking to patients — Jude shows their motivation to go into the medical field.

Jude’s closing paragraph reminds the reader of the similarities between two countries like the UK and Sri Lanka, and the importance of having a universal healthcare system that centers around the just and “world-class” treatment of patients. Overall, this essay showcases Jude’s personal initiative to continue to learn more and do better for the people they serve.

While the essay could have benefited from better transitions to weave Jude’s experiences into a personal story, its strong grounding in Jude’s motivation makes for a compelling application essay.

-- Accepted to: Weill Cornell Medical College GPA: 3.98 MCAT: 521

Sponsored by E fie Consulting Group : “ EFIIE ” boasts 100% match rate for all premedical and predental registered students. Not all students are accepted unto their pre-health student roster. Considered the most elite in the industry and assists from start to end – premed to residency. EFIIE is a one-stop-full-service education firm.

Following the physician’s unexpected request, we waited outside, anxiously waiting to hear the latest update on my father’s condition. It was early on in my father’s cancer progression – a change that had shaken our entire way of life overnight. During those 18 months, while my mother spent countless nights at the hospital, I took on the responsibility of caring for my brother. My social life became of minimal concern, and the majority of my studying for upcoming 12th- grade exams was done at the hospital. We were allowed back into the room as the physician walked out, and my parents updated us on the situation. Though we were a tight-knit family and my father wanted us to be present throughout his treatment, what this physician did was give my father a choice. Without making assumptions about who my father wanted in the room, he empowered him to make that choice independently in private. It was this respect directed towards my father, the subsequent efforts at caring for him, and the personal relationship of understanding they formed, that made the largest impact on him. Though my decision to pursue medicine came more than a year later, I deeply valued what these physicians were doing for my father, and I aspired to make a similar impact on people in the future.

It was during this period that I became curious about the human body, as we began to learn physiology in more depth at school. In previous years, the problem-based approach I could take while learning math and chemistry were primarily what sparked my interest. However, I became intrigued by how molecular interactions translated into large-scale organ function, and how these organ systems integrated together to generate the extraordinary physiological functions we tend to under-appreciate. I began my undergraduate studies with the goal of pursuing these interests, whilst leaning towards a career in medicine. While I was surprised to find that there were upwards of 40 programs within the life sciences that I could pursue, it broadened my perspective and challenged me to explore my options within science and healthcare. I chose to study pathobiology and explore my interests through hospital volunteering and research at the end of my first year.

Though my decision to pursue medicine came more than a year later, I deeply valued what these physicians were doing for my father, and I aspired to make a similar impact on people in the future.

While conducting research at St. Michael’s Hospital, I began to understand methods of data collection and analysis, and the thought process of scientific inquiry. I became acquainted with the scientific literature, and the experience transformed how I thought about the concepts I was learning in lecture. However, what stood out to me that summer was the time spent shadowing my supervisor in the neurosurgery clinic. It was where I began to fully understand what life would be like as a physician, and where the career began to truly appeal to me. What appealed to me most was the patient-oriented collaboration and discussions between my supervisor and his fellow; the physician-patient relationship that went far beyond diagnoses and treatments; and the problem solving that I experienced first-hand while being questioned on disease cases.

The day spent shadowing in the clinic was also the first time I developed a relationship with a patient. We were instructed to administer the Montreal cognitive assessment (MoCA) test to patients as they awaited the neurosurgeon. My task was to convey the instructions as clearly as possible and score each section. I did this as best I could, adapting my explanation to each patient, and paying close attention to their responses to ensure I was understood. The last patient was a challenging case, given a language barrier combined with his severe hydrocephalus. It was an emotional time for his family, seeing their father/husband struggle to complete simple tasks and subsequently give up. I encouraged him to continue trying. But I also knew my words would not remedy the condition underlying his struggles. All I could do was make attempts at lightening the atmosphere as I got to know him and his family better. Hours later, as I saw his remarkable improvement following a lumbar puncture, and the joy on his and his family’s faces at his renewed ability to walk independently, I got a glimpse of how rewarding it would be to have the ability and privilege to care for such patients. By this point, I knew I wanted to commit to a life in medicine. Two years of weekly hospital volunteering have allowed me to make a small difference in patients’ lives by keeping them company through difficult times, and listening to their concerns while striving to help in the limited way that I could. I want to have the ability to provide care and treatment on a daily basis as a physician. Moreover, my hope is that the breadth of medicine will provide me with the opportunity to make an impact on a larger scale. Whilst attending conferences on neuroscience and surgical technology, I became aware of the potential to make a difference through healthcare, and I look forward to developing the skills necessary to do so through a Master’s in Global Health. Whether through research, health innovation, or public health, I hope not only to care for patients with the same compassion with which physicians cared for my father, but to add to the daily impact I can have by tackling large-scale issues in health.

Taylor’s essay offers both a straightforward, in-depth narrative and a deep analysis of his experiences, which effectively reveals his passion and willingness to learn in the medical field. The anecdote of Taylor’s father gives the reader insight into an original instance of learning through experience and clearly articulates Taylor’s motivations for becoming a compassionate and respectful physician.

Taylor strikes an impeccable balance between discussing his accomplishments and his character. All of his life experiences — and the difficult challenges he overcame — introduce the reader to an important aspect of Taylor’s personality: his compassion, care for his family, and power of observation in reflecting on the decisions his father’s doctor makes. His description of his time volunteering at St. Michael’s Hospital is indicative of Taylor’s curiosity about medical research, but also of his recognition of the importance of the patient-physician relationship. Moreover, he shows how his volunteer work enabled him to see how medicine goes “beyond diagnoses and treatments” — an observation that also speaks to his compassion.

His description of his time volunteering at St. Michael's Hospital is indicative of Taylor's curiosity about medical research, but also of his recognition of the importance of the patient-physician relationship.

Finally, Taylor also tells the reader about his ambition and purpose, which is important when thinking about applying to medical school. He discusses his hope of tackling larger scale problems through any means possible in medicine. This notion of using self interest to better the world is imperative to a successful college essay, and it is nicely done here.

-- Accepted to: Washington University

Sponsored by A dmitRx : We are a group of Chicago-based medical students who realize how challenging medical school admissions can be, so we want to provide our future classmates with resources we wish we had. Our mission at AdmitRx is to provide pre-medical students with affordable, personalized, high-quality guidance towards becoming an admitted medical student.

Running has always been one of my greatest passions whether it be with friends or alone with my thoughts. My dad has always been my biggest role model and was the first to introduce me to the world of running. We entered races around the country, and one day he invited me on a run that changed my life forever. The St. Jude Run is an annual event that raises millions of dollars for St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. My dad has led or our local team for as long as I can remember, and I had the privilege to join when I was 16. From the first step I knew this was the environment for me – people from all walks of life united with one goal of ending childhood cancer. I had an interest in medicine before the run, and with these experiences I began to consider oncology as a career. When this came up in conversations, I would invariably be faced with the question “Do you really think you could get used to working with dying kids?” My 16-year-old self responded with something noble but naïve like “It’s important work, so I’ll have to handle it”. I was 16 years young with my plan to become an oncologist at St. Jude.

As I transitioned into college my plans for oncology were alive and well. I began working in a biochemistry lab researching new anti-cancer drugs. It was a small start, but I was overjoyed to be a part of the process. I applied to work at a number of places for the summer, but the Pediatric Oncology Education program (POE) at St. Jude was my goal. One afternoon, I had just returned from class and there it was: an email listed as ‘POE Offer’. I was ecstatic and accepted the offer immediately. Finally, I could get a glimpse at what my future holds. My future PI, Dr. Q, specialized in solid tumor translational research and I couldn’t wait to get started.

I was 16 years young with my plan to become an oncologist at St. Jude.

Summer finally came, I moved to Memphis, and I was welcomed by the X lab. I loved translational research because the results are just around the corner from helping patients. We began a pre-clinical trial of a new chemotherapy regimen and the results were looking terrific. I was also able to accompany Dr. Q whenever she saw patients in the solid tumor division. Things started simple with rounds each morning before focusing on the higher risk cases. I was fortunate enough to get to know some of the patients quite well, and I could sometimes help them pass the time with a game or two on a slow afternoon between treatments. These experiences shined a very human light on a field I had previously seen only through a microscope in a lab.

I arrived one morning as usual, but Dr. Q pulled me aside before rounds. She said one of the patients we had been seeing passed away in the night. I held my composure in the moment, but I felt as though an anvil was crushing down on me. It was tragic but I knew loss was part of the job, so I told myself to push forward. A few days later, I had mostly come to terms with what happened, but then the anvil came crashing back down with the passing of another patient. I could scarcely hold back the tears this time. That moment, it didn’t matter how many miraculous successes were happening a few doors down. Nothing overshadowed the loss, and there was no way I could ‘get used to it’ as my younger self had hoped.

I was still carrying the weight of what had happened and it was showing, so I asked Dr. Q for help. How do you keep smiling each day? How do you get used to it? The questions in my head went on. What I heard next changed my perspective forever. She said you keep smiling because no matter what happened, you’re still hope for the next patient. It’s not about getting used to it. You never get used to it and you shouldn’t. Beating cancer takes lifetimes, and you can’t look passed a life’s worth of hardships. I realized that moving passed the loss of patients would never suffice, but I need to move forward with them. Through the successes and shortcomings, we constantly make progress. I like to imagine that in all our future endeavors, it is the hands of those who have gone before us that guide the way. That is why I want to attend medical school and become a physician. We may never end the sting of loss, but physicians are the bridge between the past and the future. No where else is there the chance to learn from tragedy and use that to shape a better future. If I can learn something from one loss, keep moving forward, and use that knowledge to help even a single person – save one life, bring a moment of joy, avoid a moment of pain—then that is how I want to spend my life.

The change wasn’t overnight. The next loss still brought pain, but I took solace in moving forward so that we might learn something to give hope to a future patient. I returned to campus in a new lab doing cancer research, and my passion for medicine continues to flourish. I still think about all the people I encountered at St. Jude, especially those we lost. It might be a stretch, but during the long hours at the lab bench I still picture their hands moving through mine each step of the way. I could never have foreseen where the first steps of the St. Jude Run would bring me. I’m not sure where the road to becoming a physician may lead, but with helping hands guiding the way, I won’t be running it alone.

This essay, a description of the applicant’s intellectual challenges, displays the hardships of tending to cancer patients as a milestone of experience and realization of what it takes to be a physician. The writer explores deeper ideas beyond medicine, such as dealing with patient deaths in a way to progress and improve as a professional. In this way, the applicant gives the reader some insight into the applicant’s mindset, and their ability to think beyond the surface for ways to become better at what they do.

However, the essay fails to zero in on the applicant’s character, instead elaborating on life events that weakly illustrate the applicant’s growth as a physician. The writer’s mantra (“keep moving forward”) is feebly projected, and seems unoriginal due to the lack of a personalized connection between the experience at St. Jude and how that led to the applicant’s growth and mindset changes.

The writer explores deeper ideas beyond medicine, such as dealing with patient deaths in a way to progress and improve as a professional.

The writer, by only focusing on grief brought from patient deaths at St. Jude, misses out on the opportunity to further describe his or her experience at the hospital and portray an original, well-rounded image of his or her strengths, weaknesses, and work ethic.

The applicant ends the essay by attempting to highlight the things they learned at St. Jude, but fails to organize the ideas into a cohesive, comprehensible section. These ideas are also too abstract, and are vague indicators of the applicant’s character that are difficult to grasp.

-- Accepted to: New York University School of Medicine

Sponsored by MedEdits : MedEdits Medical Admissions has been helping applicants get into medical schools like Harvard for more than ten years. Structured like an academic medical department, MedEdits has experts in admissions, writing, editing, medicine, and interview prep working with you collaboratively so you can earn the best admissions results possible.

“Is this the movie you were talking about Alice?” I said as I showed her the movie poster on my iPhone. “Oh my God, I haven’t seen that poster in over 70 years,” she said with her arms trembling in front of her. Immediately, I sat up straight and started to question further. We were talking for about 40 minutes, and the most exciting thing she brought up in that time was the new flavor of pudding she had for lunch. All of sudden, she’s back in 1940 talking about what it was like to see this movie after school for only 5¢ a ticket! After an engaging discussion about life in the 40’s, I knew I had to indulge her. Armed with a plethora of movie streaming sights, I went to work scouring the web. No luck. The movie, “My Son My Son,” was apparently not in high demand amongst torrenting teens. I had to entreat my older brother for his Amazon Prime account to get a working stream. However, breaking up the monotony and isolation felt at the nursing home with a simple movie was worth the pandering.

While I was glad to help a resident have some fun, I was partly motivated by how much Alice reminded me of my own grandfather. In accordance with custom, my grandfather was to stay in our house once my grandmother passed away. More specifically, he stayed in my room and my bed. Just like grandma’s passing, my sudden roommate was a rough transition. In 8th grade at the time, I considered myself to be a generally good guy. Maybe even good enough to be a doctor one day. I volunteered at the hospital, shadowed regularly, and had a genuine interest for science. However, my interest in medicine was mostly restricted to academia. To be honest, I never had a sustained exposure to the palliative side of medicine until the arrival of my new roommate.

The two years I slept on that creaky wooden bed with him was the first time my metal was tested. Sharing that room, I was the one to take care of him. I was the one to rub ointment on his back, to feed him when I came back from school, and to empty out his spittoon when it got full. It was far from glamorous, and frustrating most of the time. With 75 years separating us, and senile dementia setting in, he would often forget who I was or where he was. Having to remind him that I was his grandson threatened to erode at my resolve. Assured by my Syrian Orthodox faith, I even prayed about it; asking God for comfort and firmness on my end. Over time, I grew slow to speak and eager to listen as he started to ramble more and more about bits and pieces of the past. If I was lucky, I would be able to stich together a narrative that may or may have not been true. In any case, my patience started to bud beyond my age group.

Having to remind him that I was his grandson threatened to erode at my resolve.

Although I grew more patient with his disease, my curiosity never really quelled. Conversely, it developed further alongside my rapidly growing interest in the clinical side of medicine. Naturally, I became drawn to a neurology lab in college where I got to study pathologies ranging from atrophy associated with schizophrenia, and necrotic lesions post stroke. However, unlike my intro biology courses, my work at the neurology lab was rooted beyond the academics. Instead, I found myself driven by real people who could potentially benefit from our research. In particular, my shadowing experience with Dr. Dominger in the Veteran’s home made the patient more relevant in our research as I got to encounter geriatric patients with age related diseases, such as Alzhimer’s and Parkinson’s. Furthermore, I had the privilege of of talking to the families of a few of these patients to get an idea of the impact that these diseases had on the family structure. For me, the scut work in the lab meant a lot more with these families in mind than the tritium tracer we were using in the lab.

Despite my achievements in the lab and the classroom, my time with my grandfather still holds a special place in my life story. The more I think about him, the more confident I am in my decision to pursue a career where caring for people is just as important, if not more important, than excelling at academics. Although it was a lot of work, the years spent with him was critical in expanding my horizons both in my personal life and in the context of medicine. While I grew to be more patient around others, I also grew to appreciate medicine beyond the science. This more holistic understanding of medicine had a synergistic effect in my work as I gained a purpose behind the extra hours in the lab, sleepless nights in the library, and longer hours volunteering. I had a reason for what I was doing that may one day help me have long conversations with my own grandchildren about the price of popcorn in the 2000’s.

The most important thing to highlight in Avery’s essay is how he is able to create a duality between his interest in not only the clinical, more academic-based side of medicine, but also the field’s personal side.

He draws personal connections between working with Alice — a patient in a hospital or nursing home — and caring intensely for his grandfather. These two experiences build up the “synergistic” relationship between caring for people and studying the science behind medicine. In this way, he is able to clearly state his passions for medicine and explain his exact motives for entering the field. Furthermore, in his discussion of her grandfather, he effectively employs imagery (“rub ointment on his back,” “feed him when I came back from school,” etc.) to describe the actual work that he does, calling it initially as “far from glamorous, and frustrating most of the time.” By first mentioning his initial impression, then transitioning into how he grew to appreciate the experience, Avery is able to demonstrate a strength of character, sense of enormous responsibility and capability, and open-minded attitude.

He draws personal connections between working with Alice — a patient in a hospital or nursing home — and caring intensely for his grandfather.

Later in the essay, Avery is also able to relate his time caring for his grandfather to his work with Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s patients, showcasing the social impact of his work, as the reader is likely already familiar with the biological impact of the work. This takes Avery’s essay full circle, bringing it back to how a discussion with an elderly patient about the movies reminds him of why he chose to pursue medicine.

That said, the essay does feel rushed near the end, as the writer was likely trying to remain within the word count. There could be a more developed transition before Avery introduces the last sentence about “conversations with my own grandchildren,” especially as a strong essay ending is always recommended.

-- Accepted To: Saint Louis University Medical School Direct Admission Medical Program

Sponsored by Atlas Admissions : Atlas Admissions provides expert medical school admissions consulting and test preparation services. Their experienced, physician-driven team consistently delivers top results by designing comprehensive, personalized strategies to optimize applications. Atlas Admissions is based in Boston, MA and is trusted by clients worldwide.

The tension in the office was tangible. The entire team sat silently sifting through papers as Dr. L introduced Adam, a 60-year-old morbidly obese man recently admitted for a large open wound along his chest. As Dr. L reviewed the details of the case, his prognosis became even bleaker: hypertension, diabetes, chronic kidney disease, cardiomyopathy, hyperlipidemia; the list went on and on. As the humdrum of the side-conversations came to a halt, and the shuffle of papers softened, the reality of Adam’s situation became apparent. Adam had a few months to live at best, a few days at worst. To make matters worse, Adam’s insurance would not cover his treatment costs. With no job, family, or friends, he was dying poor and alone.

I followed Dr. L out of the conference room, unsure what would happen next. “Well,” she muttered hesitantly, “We need to make sure that Adam is on the same page as us.” It’s one thing to hear bad news, and another to hear it utterly alone. Dr. L frantically reviewed all of Adam’s paperwork desperately looking for someone to console him, someone to be at his side. As she began to make calls, I saw that being a physician calls for more than good grades and an aptitude for science: it requires maturity, sacrifice, and most of all, empathy. That empathy is exactly what I saw in Dr. L as she went out of her way to comfort a patient she met hardly 20 minutes prior.

Since high school, I’ve been fascinated by technology’s potential to improve healthcare. As a volunteer in [the] Student Ambassador program, I was fortunate enough to watch an open-heart surgery. Intrigued by the confluence of technology and medicine, I chose to study biomedical engineering. At [school], I wanted to help expand this interface, so I became involved with research through Dr. P’s lab by studying the applications of electrospun scaffolds for dermal wound healing. While still in the preliminary stages of research, I learned about the Disability Service Club (DSC) and decided to try something new by volunteering at a bowling outing.

As she began to make calls, I saw that being a physician calls for more than good grades and an aptitude for science: it requires maturity, sacrifice, and most of all, empathy.

The DSC promotes awareness of cognitive disabilities in the community and seeks to alleviate difficulties for the disabled. During one outing, I collaborated with Arc, a local organization with a similar mission. Walking in, I was told that my role was to support the participants by providing encouragement. I decided to help a relatively quiet group of individuals assisted by only one volunteer, Mary. Mary informed me that many individuals with whom I was working were diagnosed with ASD. Suddenly, she started cheering, as one of the members of the group bowled a strike. The group went wild. Everyone was dancing, singing, and rejoicing. Then I noticed one gentleman sitting at our table, solemn-faced. I tried to start a conversation with him, but he remained unresponsive. I sat with him for the rest of the game, trying my hardest to think of questions that would elicit more than a monosyllabic response, but to no avail. As the game ended, I stood up to say bye when he mumbled, “Thanks for talking.” Then he quickly turned his head away. I walked away beaming. Although I was unable to draw out a smile or even sustain a conversation, at the end of the day, the fact that this gentleman appreciated my mere effort completely overshadowed the awkwardness of our time together. Later that day, I realized that as much as I enjoyed the thrill of research and its applications, helping other people was what I was most passionate about.

When it finally came time to tell Adam about his deteriorating condition, I was not sure how he would react. Dr. L gently greeted him and slowly let reality take its toll. He stoically turned towards Dr. L and groaned, “I don’t really care. Just leave me alone.” Dr. L gave him a concerned nod and gradually left the room. We walked to the next room where we met with a pastor from Adam’s church.

“Adam’s always been like that,” remarked the pastor, “he’s never been one to express emotion.” We sat with his pastor for over an hour discussing how we could console Adam. It turned out that Adam was part of a motorcycle club, but recently quit because of his health. So, Dr. L arranged for motorcycle pictures and other small bike trinkets to be brought to his room as a reminder of better times.

Dr. L’s simple gesture reminded me of why I want to pursue medicine. There is something sacred, empowering, about providing support when people need it the most; whether it be simple as starting a conversation, or providing support during the most trying of times. My time spent conducting research kindled my interest in the science of medicine, and my service as a volunteer allowed me to realize how much I valued human interaction. Science and technology form the foundation of medicine, but to me, empathy is the essence. It is my combined interest in science and service that inspires me to pursue medicine. It is that combined interest that makes me aspire to be a physician.

Parker’s essay focuses on one central narrative with a governing theme of compassionate and attentive care for patients, which is the key motivator for her application to medical school. Parker’s story focuses on her volunteer experience shadowing of Dr. L who went the extra mile for Adam, which sets Dr. L up as a role model for Parker as she enters the medical field. This effectively demonstrates to the reader what kind of doctor Parker wants to be in the future.

Parker’s narrative has a clear beginning, middle, and end, making it easy for the reader to follow. She intersperses the main narrative about Adam with experiences she has with other patients and reflects upon her values as she contemplates pursuing medicine as a career. Her anecdote about bowling with the patients diagnosed with ASD is another instance where she uses a story to tell the reader why she values helping people through medicine and attentive patient care, especially as she focuses on the impact her work made on one man at the event.

Parker's story focuses on her volunteer experience shadowing of Dr. L who went the extra mile for Adam, which sets Dr. L up as a role model for Parker as she enters the medical field.

All throughout the essay, the writing is engaging and Parker incorporates excellent imagery, which goes well with her varied sentence structure. The essay is also strong because it comes back full circle at its conclusion, tying the overall narrative back to the story of Dr. L and Adam, which speaks to Parker’s motives for going to medical school.

-- Accepted To: Emory School of Medicine

Growing up, I enjoyed visiting my grandparents. My grandfather was an established doctor, helping the sick and elderly in rural Taiwan until two weeks before he died at 91 years old. His clinic was located on the first floor of the residency with an exam room, treatment room, X-ray room, and small pharmacy. Curious about his work, I would follow him to see his patients. Grandpa often asked me if I want to be a doctor just like him. I always smiled, but was more interested in how to beat the latest Pokémon game. I was in 8th grade when my grandfather passed away. I flew back to Taiwan to attend his funeral. It was a gloomy day and the only street in the small village became a mourning place for the villagers. Flowers filled the streets and people came to pay their respects. An old man told me a story: 60 years ago, a village woman was in a difficult labor. My grandfather rushed into the house and delivered a baby boy. That boy was the old man and he was forever grateful. Stories of grandpa saving lives and bringing happiness to families were told during the ceremony. At that moment, I realized why my grandfather worked so tirelessly up until his death as a physician. He did it for the reward of knowing that he kept a family together and saved a life. The ability for a doctor to heal and bring happiness is the reason why I want to study medicine. Medical school is the first step on a lifelong journey of learning, but I feel that my journey leading up to now has taught me some things of what it means to be an effective physician.

With a newfound purpose, I began volunteering and shadowing at my local hospital. One situation stood out when I was a volunteer in the cardiac stress lab. As I attached EKG leads onto a patient, suddenly the patient collapsed and started gasping for air. His face turned pale, then slightly blue. The charge nurse triggered “Code Blue” and started CPR. A team of doctors and nurses came, rushing in with a defibrillator to treat and stabilize the patient. What I noticed was that medicine was not only about one individual acting as a superhero to save a life, but that it takes a team of individuals with an effective leader, working together to deliver the best care. I want to be a leader as well as part of a team that can make a difference in a person’s life. I have refined these lessons about teamwork and leadership to my activities. In high school I was an 8 time varsity letter winner for swimming and tennis and captain of both of those teams. In college I have participated in many activities, but notably serving as assistant principle cellist in my school symphony as well as being a co-founding member of a quartet. From both my athletic experiences and my music experiences I learned what it was like to not only assert my position as a leader and to effectively communicate my views, but equally as important I learned how to compromise and listen to the opinions of others. Many physicians that I have observed show a unique blend of confidence and humility.

What I noticed was that medicine was not only about one individual acting as a superhero to save a life, but that it takes a team of individuals with an effective leader, working together to deliver the best care.

College opened me up to new perspectives on what makes a complete physician. A concept that was preached in the Guaranteed Professional Program Admissions in Medicine (GPPA) was that medicine is both an art and a science. The art of medicine deals with a variety of aspects including patient relationships as well as ethics. Besides my strong affinity for the sciences and mathematics, I always have had interest in history. I took courses in both German literature and history, which influenced me to take a class focusing on Nazi neuroscientists. It was the ideology of seeing the disabled and different races as test subjects rather than people that led to devastating lapses in medical ethics. The most surprising fact for me was that doctors who were respected and leaders in their field disregarded the humanity of patient and rather focused on getting results from their research. Speaking with Dr. Zeidman, the professor for this course, influenced me to start my research which deals with the ethical qualms of using data derived from unethical Nazi experimentation such as the brains derived from the adult and child euthanasia programs. Today, science is so result driven, it is important to keep in mind the ethics behind research and clinical practice. Also the development of personalized genomic medicine brings into question about potential privacy violations and on the extreme end discrimination. The study of ethics no matter the time period is paramount in the medical field. The end goal should always be to put the patient first.

Teaching experiences in college inspired me to become a physician educator if I become a doctor. Post-MCAT, I was offered a job by Next Step Test Prep as a tutor to help students one on one for the MCAT. I had a student who stated he was doing well during practice, but couldn’t get the correct answer during practice tests. Working with the student, I pointed out his lack of understanding concepts and this realization helped him and improves his MCAT score. Having the ability to educate the next generation of doctors is not only necessary, but also a rewarding experience.

My experiences volunteering and shadowing doctors in the hospital as well as my understanding of what it means to be a complete physician will make me a good candidate as a medical school student. It is my goal to provide the best care to patients and to put a smile on a family’s face just as my grandfather once had. Achieving this goal does not take a special miracle, but rather hard work, dedication, and an understanding of what it means to be an effective physician.

Through reflecting on various stages of life, Quinn expresses how they found purpose in pursuing medicine. Starting as a child more interested in Pokemon than their grandfather’s patients, Quinn exhibits personal growth through recognizing the importance of their grandfather’s work saving lives and eventually gaining the maturity to work towards this goal as part of a team.

This essay opens with abundant imagery — of the grandfather’s clinic, flowers filling the streets, and the village woman’s difficult labor — which grounds Quinn’s story in their family roots. Yet, the transition from shadowing in hospitals to pursuing leadership positions in high schools is jarring, and the list of athletic and musical accomplishments reads like a laundry list of accomplishments until Quinn neatly wraps them up as evidence of leadership and teamwork skills. Similarly, the section about tutoring, while intended to demonstrate Quinn’s desire to educate future physicians, lacks the emotional resonance necessary to elevate it from another line lifted from their resume.

This essay opens with abundant imagery — of the grandfather's clinic, flowers filling the streets, and the village woman's difficult labor — which grounds Quinn's story in their family roots.

The strongest point of Quinn’s essay is the focus on their unique arts and humanities background. This equips them with a unique perspective necessary to consider issues in medicine in a new light. Through detailing how history and literature coursework informed their unique research, Quinn sets their application apart from the multitude of STEM-focused narratives. Closing the essay with the desire to help others just as their grandfather had, Quinn ties the narrative back to their personal roots.

-- Accepted To: Edinburgh University UCAT Score: 2810 BMAT Score: 4.6, 4.2, 3.5A

Exposure to the medical career from an early age by my father, who would explain diseases of the human body, sparked my interest for Medicine and drove me to seek out work experience. I witnessed the contrast between use of bone saws and drills to gain access to the brain, with subsequent use of delicate instruments and microscopes in neurosurgery. The surgeon's care to remove the tumour, ensuring minimal damage to surrounding healthy brain and his commitment to achieve the best outcome for the patient was inspiring. The chance to have such a positive impact on a patient has motivated me to seek out a career in Medicine.

Whilst shadowing a surgical team in Texas, carrying out laparoscopic bariatric procedures, I appreciated the surgeon's dedication to continual professional development and research. I was inspired to carry out an Extended Project Qualification on whether bariatric surgery should be funded by the NHS. By researching current literature beyond my school curriculum, I learnt to assess papers for bias and use reliable sources to make a conclusion on a difficult ethical situation. I know that doctors are required to carry out research and make ethical decisions and so, I want to continue developing these skills during my time at medical school.

The chance to have such a positive impact on a patient has motivated me to seek out a career in Medicine.

Attending an Oncology multi-disciplinary team meeting showed me the importance of teamwork in medicine. I saw each team member, with specific areas of expertise, contributing to the discussion and actively listening, and together they formed a holistic plan of action for patients. During my Young Enterprise Award, I facilitated a brainstorm where everyone pitched a product idea. Each member offered a different perspective on the idea and then voted on a product to carry forward in the competition. As a result, we came runners up in the Regional Finals. Furthermore, I started developing my leadership skills, which I improved by doing Duke of Edinburgh Silver and attending a St. John Ambulance Leadership course. In one workshop, similar to the bariatric surgeon I shadowed, I communicated instructions and delegated roles to my team to successfully solve a puzzle. These experiences highlighted the crucial need for teamwork and leadership as a doctor.

Observing a GP, I identified the importance of compassion and empathy. During a consultation with a severely depressed patient, the GP came to the patient's eye level and used a calm, non-judgmental tone of voice, easing her anxieties and allowing her to disclose more information. While volunteering at a care home weekly for two years, I adapted my communication for a resident suffering with dementia who was disconnected from others. I would take her to a quiet environment, speak slowly and in a non-threatening manner, as such, she became talkative, engaged and happier. I recognised that communication and compassion allows doctors to build rapport, gain patients' trust and improve compliance. For two weeks, I shadowed a surgeon performing multiple craniotomies a day. I appreciated the challenges facing doctors including time and stress management needed to deliver high quality care. Organisation, by prioritising patients based on urgency and creating a timetable on the ward round, was key to running the theatre effectively. Similarly, I create to-do-lists and prioritise my academics and extra-curricular activities to maintain a good work-life balance: I am currently preparing for my Grade 8 in Singing, alongside my A-level exams. I also play tennis for the 1st team to relax and enable me to refocus. I wish to continue my hobbies at university, as ways to manage stress.

Through my work experiences and voluntary work, I have gained a realistic understanding of Medicine and its challenges. I have begun to display the necessary skills that I witnessed, such as empathy, leadership and teamwork. The combination of these skills with my fascination for the human body drives me to pursue a place at medical school and a career as a doctor.

This essay traces Alex's personal exploration of medicine through different stages of life, taking a fairly traditional path to the medical school application essay. From witnessing medical procedures to eventually pursuing leadership positions, this tale of personal progress argues that Alex's life has prepared him to become a doctor.

Alex details how experiences conducting research and working with medical teams have confirmed his interest in medicine. Although the breadth of experiences speaks to the applicant’s interest in medicine, the essay verges on being a regurgitation of the Alex's resume, which does not provide the admissions officer with any new insights or information and ultimately takes away from the essay as a whole. As such, the writing’s lack of voice or unique perspective puts the applicant at risk of sounding middle-of-the-road.

From witnessing medical procedures to eventually pursuing leadership positions, this tale of personal progress argues that Alex's life has prepared him to become a doctor.

The essay’s organization, however, is one of its strengths — each paragraph provides an example of personal growth through a new experience in medicine. Further, Alex demonstrates his compassion and diligence through detailed stories, which give a reader a glimpse into his values. Through recognizing important skills necessary to be a doctor, Alex demonstrates that he has the mature perspective necessary to embark upon this journey.

What this essay lacks in a unique voice, it makes up for in professionalism and organization. Alex's earnest desire to attend medical school is what makes this essay shine.

-- Accepted To: University of Toronto MCAT Scores: Chemical and Physical Foundations of Biological Systems - 128, Critical Analysis and Reading Skills - 127, Biological and Biochemical Foundations of Living Systems - 127, Psychological, Social, and Biological Foundations of Behavior - 130, Total - 512

Moment of brilliance.

Revelation.

These are all words one would use to describe their motivation by a higher calling to achieve something great. Such an experience is often cited as the reason for students to become physicians; I was not one of these students. Instead of waiting for an event like this, I chose to get involved in the activities that I found most invigorating. Slowly but surely, my interests, hobbies, and experiences inspired me to pursue medicine.

As a medical student, one must possess a solid academic foundation to facilitate an understanding of physical health and illness. Since high school, I found science courses the most appealing and tended to devote most of my time to their exploration. I also enjoyed learning about the music, food, literature, and language of other cultures through Latin and French class. I chose the Medical Sciences program because it allowed for flexibility in course selection. I have studied several scientific disciplines in depth like physiology and pathology while taking classes in sociology, psychology, and classical studies. Such a diverse academic portfolio has strengthened my ability to consider multiple viewpoints and attack problems from several angles. I hope to relate to patients from all walks of life as a physician and offer them personalized treatment.

I was motivated to travel as much as possible by learning about other cultures in school. Exposing myself to different environments offered me perspective on universal traits that render us human. I want to pursue medicine because I believe that this principle of commonality relates to medical practice in providing objective and compassionate care for all. Combined with my love for travel, this realization took me to Nepal with Volunteer Abroad (VA) to build a school for a local orphanage (4). The project’s demands required a group of us to work closely as a team to accomplish the task. Rooted in different backgrounds, we often had conflicting perspectives; even a simple task such as bricklaying could stir up an argument because each person had their own approach. However, we discussed why we came to Nepal and reached the conclusion that all we wanted was to build a place of education for the children. Our unifying goal allowed us to reach compromises and truly appreciate the value of teamwork. These skills are vital in a clinical setting, where physicians and other health care professionals need to collaborate as a multidisciplinary team to tackle patients’ physical, emotional, social, and psychological problems.

I hope to relate to patients from all walks of life as a physician and offer them personalized treatment.

The insight I gained from my Nepal excursion encouraged me to undertake and develop the role of VA campus representative (4). Unfortunately, many students are not equipped with the resources to volunteer abroad; I raised awareness about local initiatives so everyone had a chance to do their part. I tried to avoid pushing solely for international volunteerism for this reason and also because it can undermine the work of local skilled workers and foster dependency. Nevertheless, I took on this position with VA because I felt that the potential benefits were more significant than the disadvantages. Likewise, doctors must constantly weigh out the pros and cons of a situation to help a patient make the best choice. I tried to dispel fears of traveling abroad by sharing first-hand experiences so that students could make an informed decision. When people approached me regarding unfamiliar placements, I researched their questions and provided them with both answers and a sense of security. I found great fulfillment in addressing the concerns of individuals, and I believe that similar processes could prove invaluable in the practice of medicine.

As part of the Sickkids Summer Research Program, I began to appreciate the value of experimental investigation and evidence-based medicine (23). Responsible for initiating an infant nutrition study at a downtown clinic, I was required to explain the project’s implications and daily protocol to physicians, nurses and phlebotomists. I took anthropometric measurements and blood pressure of children aged 1-10 and asked parents about their and their child’s diet, television habits, physical exercise regimen, and sunlight exposure. On a few occasions, I analyzed and presented a small set of data to my superiors through oral presentations and written documents.

With continuous medical developments, physicians must participate in lifelong learning. More importantly, they can engage in research to further improve the lives of their patients. I encountered a young mother one day at the clinic struggling to complete the study’s questionnaires. After I asked her some questions, she began to open up to me as her anxiety subsided; she then told me that her child suffered from low iron. By talking with the physician and reading a few articles, I recommended a few supplements and iron-rich foods to help her child. This experience in particular helped me realize that I enjoy clinical research and strive to address the concerns of people with whom I interact.

Research is often impeded by a lack of government and private funding. My clinical placement motivated me to become more adept in budgeting, culminating in my role as founding Co-President of the UWO Commerce Club (ICCC) (9). Together, fellow club executives and I worked diligently to get the club ratified, a process that made me aware of the bureaucratic challenges facing new organizations. Although we had a small budget, we found ways of minimizing expenditure on advertising so that we were able to host more speakers who lectured about entrepreneurship and overcoming challenges. Considering the limited space available in hospitals and the rising cost of health care, physicians, too, are often forced to prioritize and manage the needs of their patients.

No one needs a grand revelation to pursue medicine. Although passion is vital, it is irrelevant whether this comes suddenly from a life-altering event or builds up progressively through experience. I enjoyed working in Nepal, managing resources, and being a part of clinical and research teams; medicine will allow me to combine all of these aspects into one wholesome career.

I know with certainty that this is the profession for me.

Jimmy opens this essay hinting that his essay will follow a well-worn path, describing the “big moment” that made him realize why he needed to become a physician. But Jimmy quickly turns the reader’s expectation on its head by stating that he did not have one of those moments. By doing this, Jimmy commands attention and has the reader waiting for an explanation. He soon provides the explanation that doubles as the “thesis” of his essay: Jimmy thinks passion can be built progressively, and Jimmy’s life progression has led him to the medical field.

Jimmy did not make the decision to pursue a career in medicine lightly. Instead he displays through anecdotes that his separate passions — helping others, exploring different walks of life, personal responsibility, and learning constantly, among others — helped Jimmy realize that being a physician was the career for him. By talking readers through his thought process, it is made clear that Jimmy is a critical thinker who can balance multiple different perspectives simultaneously. The ability to evaluate multiple options and make an informed, well-reasoned decision is one that bodes well for Jimmy’s medical career.

While in some cases this essay does a lot of “telling,” the comprehensive and decisive walkthrough indicates what Jimmy’s idea of a doctor is. To him, a doctor is someone who is genuinely interested in his work, someone who can empathize and related to his patients, someone who can make important decisions with a clear head, and someone who is always trying to learn more. Just like his decision to work at the VA, Jimmy has broken down the “problem” (what his career should be) and reached a sound conclusion.

By talking readers through his thought process, it is made clear that Jimmy is a critical thinker who can balance multiple different perspectives simultaneously.

Additionally, this essay communicates Jimmy’s care for others. While it is not always advisable to list one’s volunteer efforts, each activity Jimmy lists has a direct application to his essay. Further, the sheer amount of philanthropic work that Jimmy does speaks for itself: Jimmy would not have worked at VA, spent a summer with Sickkids, or founded the UWO finance club if he were not passionate about helping others through medicine. Like the VA story, the details of Jimmy’s participation in Sickkids and the UWO continue to show how he has thought about and embodied the principles that a physician needs to be successful.

Jimmy’s essay both breaks common tropes and lives up to them. By framing his “list” of activities with his passion-happens-slowly mindset, Jimmy injects purpose and interest into what could have been a boring and braggadocious essay if it were written differently. Overall, this essay lets the reader know that Jimmy is seriously dedicated to becoming a physician, and both his thoughts and his actions inspire confidence that he will give medical school his all.

The Crimson's news and opinion teams—including writers, editors, photographers, and designers—were not involved in the production of this content.

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August 27, 2021

16 R’s for Medical School Essay Writing

Writing can be daunting for all of us. “What do I write about?” is the most common question that comes to mind when contemplating medical school personal statements or secondary essays. When writing these essays, organization is crucial. The thought of writing an essay up to 5300 characters long for AMCAS or several pages long for secondary essay prompts can feel like a Herculean task. Furthermore, these compositions can be the end of your application if not approached correctly. To help with organizing your essays, I have broken down the process into sixteen R’s.

OK. Let’s get started! 

• Relax : Writing is challenging enough, but when you are tense and stressed, it feels impossible. Listen to soothing music, do a favorite exercise before you sit down to write, or try a little yoga. Getting into a relaxed mindset can help you think about all the experiences that brought you to your decision to pursue medicine.
• Recreational : Make your essay writing recreationa l or fun. “Fun?” you may ask. How can essay writing be fun? Well, I think the beloved fictional character Mary Poppins was not too far off the mark when she said, “In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun.” Since you will be spending a significant amount of time writing your medical school essays , making them as fun as possible is indispensable. Pretending that you are a famous physician in an interview on the news or a celebrity looking back on your life and writing your memoirs can help bring your creative thoughts to mind. 

• Recite , Rehearse , and Record : “Where do I start?” is another common question. Describing your thoughts aloud and reciting and rehearsing them before you put them down on paper can help a great deal to get those “creative juices flowing.” You don’t need anything fancy to record your thoughts—your smartphone will work perfectly well. If it helps, have some soft, pensive music playing in the background as long as it is not distracting. And remember that how you express yourself doesn’t need to be perfect because the only person that will hear the recording is you. This is just an exercise to help you get those thoughts flowing before putting them down on paper. You’ll be surprised at how helpful listening to your recording is to jump-start your writing. 
• Readable : Your essay should capture the reader’s attention from the opening sentence and maintain that interest throughout the text. Try to make the reader feel as if they are there with you, experiencing what you felt. 
• Rich : You should use rich , descriptive language so that you take the reader on your “expedition.” Let the reader feel like they are “traveling” with you and experiencing what you experienced. 
• Retell : In addition, your essay should elaborate on critical details in your story; if your essay has not elaborated on these details, retell your story and expand upon the important events so that the reader has a perfect picture in their mind of what took place. By doing so, you will put the reader in your story and make it come alive for them.
• Rhythm : Your essay should have rhythm —it should be well organized both within and between paragraphs, and each section should be well connected to the others with smooth transitions. 
• Relevance : Given the character limits of your medical school essays, every word and sentence should be relevant . Don’t waste critical character space on sentences that are not pertinent to your story. In the case of secondary essays, make sure your answer is relevant to the question asked and the school you are applying to.
• Relate and Reply : For both the personal statement and each secondary essay, the experiences you write about in your body paragraphs should relate to each other in some way so that you have an over-arching theme for your essay. Find the common denominator between your experiences to help find your theme. For your secondary essays, you must reply to the specific question posed.
• Research : When writing your secondary essays, make sure you research the schools to ensure that your goals are a good match for their guiding principles.
• Reveal : Furthermore, your writing should reveal different qualities that will make you an outstanding physician . The best essays are heartfelt and evoke emotion. 
• Reflective : Perhaps, the most necessary characteristic of your essay is to be reflective . Your essay should reflect on the meaningful experiences that were pivotal in your decision to pursue medicine or apply to specific medical schools. Ask yourself why a particular experience made you feel as you did and how you will assimilate the spirit of what you learned from the experience into your future career. Why is it significant to you?
• Refine : Another essential step in your essay writing is to refine your language. For our first draft, don’t worry about style. But after you write that first draft, review it and aim for a tone and style that shows you’re already a professional. Write your essay with a professional writing style and avoid slang or colloquial sayings. This is not social media.
• Return , Refer , and Remind : Coming to the home stretch, you should return to the introduction in your essay’s conclusion and refer back to the introductory paragraph in some way to end your essay on a powerful note and remind the reader of the significance of the opening paragraph in your decision to become a physician.
• Review : The final step in writing your essay is to review your essay several times once you finish it. Review , review , review should become your essay writing slogan. I cannot emphasize enough how important it is to review your essay multiple times for spelling, grammatical, and writing errors. For secondaries , make sure you have the correct school’s name everywhere. Finally, if at all possible, put a little time between your last revision and your proof. And make sure that you are alert when you check your essay if you really want to catch all errors.

If you follow the above steps, you are on your way to writing a truly remarkable essay. (Yes, remarkable is my final “R”.)

Best of luck and have fun writing!

Are you ready to apply the 16 R’s to your med school application essays? Accepted’s expert consultants know just how to help you highlight your strengths and craft an application that will help you get accepted to your top choice medical school. Check out our one-on-one admissions services so you can ace your application and GET ACCEPTED!

Related Resources:

• Medical School Sample Personal Statements
• 5 Fatal Flaws to Avoid in Your Medical School Application Essays
• 9 Secrets to Telling an Attention-Grabbing Story

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• Sample Essays

Sample Medical School Essays

Applying to medical school is an exciting decision, but the application process is very competitive. This means when it comes to your application you need to ensure you’ve put your best foot forward and done everything you can to stand out from other applicants. One great way to provide additional information on why you have decided to pursue a career in medicine and why you’re qualified, is your medical school essay. Read these samples to get a good idea on how you can write your own top-notch essay.

This section contains five sample medical school essays

• Medical School Sample Essay One
• Medical School Sample Essay Two
• Medical School Sample Essay Three
• Medical School Sample Essay Four
• Medical School Sample Essay Five

Medical School Essay One

When I was twelve years old, a drunk driver hit the car my mother was driving while I was in the backseat. I have very few memories of the accident, but I do faintly recall a serious but calming face as I was gently lifted out of the car. The paramedic held my hand as we traveled to the hospital. I was in the hospital for several weeks and that same paramedic came to visit me almost every day. During my stay, I also got to know the various doctors and nurses in the hospital on a personal level. I remember feeling anxiety about my condition, but not sadness or even fear. It seemed to me that those around me, particularly my family, were more fearful of what might happen to me than I was. I don’t believe it was innocence or ignorance, but rather a trust in the abilities of my doctors. It was as if my doctors and I had a silent bond. Now that I’m older I fear death and sickness in a more intense way than I remember experiencing it as a child. My experience as a child sparked a keen interest in how we approach pediatric care, especially as it relates to our psychological and emotional support of children facing serious medical conditions. It was here that I experienced first-hand the power and compassion of medicine, not only in healing but also in bringing unlikely individuals together, such as adults and children, in uncommon yet profound ways. And it was here that I began to take seriously the possibility of becoming a pediatric surgeon.

My interest was sparked even more when, as an undergraduate, I was asked to assist in a study one of my professors was conducting on how children experience and process fear and the prospect of death. This professor was not in the medical field; rather, her background is in cultural anthropology. I was very honored to be part of this project at such an early stage of my career. During the study, we discovered that children face death in extremely different ways than adults do. We found that children facing fatal illnesses are very aware of their condition, even when it hasn’t been fully explained to them, and on the whole were willing to fight their illnesses, but were also more accepting of their potential fate than many adults facing similar diagnoses. We concluded our study by asking whether and to what extent this discovery should impact the type of care given to children in contrast to adults. I am eager to continue this sort of research as I pursue my medical career. The intersection of medicine, psychology, and socialization or culture (in this case, the social variables differentiating adults from children) is quite fascinating and is a field that is in need of better research.

Although much headway has been made in this area in the past twenty or so years, I feel there is a still a tendency in medicine to treat diseases the same way no matter who the patient is. We are slowly learning that procedures and drugs are not always universally effective. Not only must we alter our care of patients depending upon these cultural and social factors, we may also need to alter our entire emotional and psychological approach to them as well.

It is for this reason that I’m applying to the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine, as it has one of the top programs for pediatric surgery in the country, as well as several renowned researchers delving into the social, generational, and cultural questions in which I’m interested. My approach to medicine will be multidisciplinary, which is evidenced by the fact that I’m already double-majoring in early childhood psychology and pre-med, with a minor in cultural anthropology. This is the type of extraordinary care that I received as a child—care that seemed to approach my injuries with a much larger and deeper picture than that which pure medicine cannot offer—and it is this sort of care I want to provide my future patients. I turned what might have been a debilitating event in my life—a devastating car accident—into the inspiration that has shaped my life since. I am driven and passionate. And while I know that the pediatric surgery program at Johns Hopkins will likely be the second biggest challenge I will face in my life, I know that I am up for it. I am ready to be challenged and prove to myself what I’ve been telling myself since that fateful car accident: I will be a doctor.

Tips for a Successful Medical School Essay

• If you’re applying through AMCAS, remember to keep your essay more general rather than tailored to a specific medical school, because your essay will be seen by multiple schools.
• AMCAS essays are limited to 5300 characters—not words! This includes spaces.
• Make sure the information you include in your essay doesn't conflict with the information in your other application materials.
• In general, provide additional information that isn’t found in your other application materials. Look at the essay as an opportunity to tell your story rather than a burden.
• Keep the interview in mind as you write. You will most likely be asked questions regarding your essay during the interview, so think about the experiences you want to talk about.
• When you are copying and pasting from a word processor to the AMCAS application online, formatting and font will be lost. Don’t waste your time making it look nice. Be sure to look through the essay once you’ve copied it into AMCAS and edit appropriately for any odd characters that result from pasting.
• Avoid overly controversial topics. While it is fine to take a position and back up your position with evidence, you don’t want to sound narrow-minded.
• Revise, revise, revise. Have multiple readers look at your essay and make suggestions. Go over your essay yourself many times and rewrite it several times until you feel that it communicates your message effectively and creatively.
• Make the opening sentence memorable. Admissions officers will read dozens of personal statements in a day. You must say something at the very beginning to catch their attention, encourage them to read the essay in detail, and make yourself stand out from the crowd.
• Character traits to portray in your essay include: maturity, intellect, critical thinking skills, leadership, tolerance, perseverance, and sincerity.

Medical School Essay Two

If you had told me ten years ago that I would be writing this essay and planning for yet another ten years into the future, part of me would have been surprised. I am a planner and a maker of to-do lists, and it has always been my plan to follow in the steps of my father and become a physician. This plan was derailed when I was called to active duty to serve in Iraq as part of the War on Terror.

I joined the National Guard before graduating high school and continued my service when I began college. My goal was to receive training that would be valuable for my future medical career, as I was working in the field of emergency health care. It was also a way to help me pay for college. When I was called to active duty in Iraq for my first deployment, I was forced to withdraw from school, and my deployment was subsequently extended. I spent a total of 24 months deployed overseas, where I provided in-the-field medical support to our combat troops. While the experience was invaluable not only in terms of my future medical career but also in terms of developing leadership and creative thinking skills, it put my undergraduate studies on hold for over two years. Consequently, my carefully-planned journey towards medical school and a medical career was thrown off course. Thus, while ten-year plans are valuable, I have learned from experience how easily such plans can dissolve in situations that are beyond one’s control, as well as the value of perseverance and flexibility.

Eventually, I returned to school. Despite my best efforts to graduate within two years, it took me another three years, as I suffered greatly from post-traumatic stress disorder following my time in Iraq. I considered abandoning my dream of becoming a physician altogether, since I was several years behind my peers with whom I had taken biology and chemistry classes before my deployment. Thanks to the unceasing encouragement of my academic advisor, who even stayed in contact with me when I was overseas, I gathered my strength and courage and began studying for the MCAT. To my surprise, my score was beyond satisfactory and while I am several years behind my original ten-year plan, I am now applying to Brown University’s School of Medicine.

I can describe my new ten-year plan, but I will do so with both optimism and also caution, knowing that I will inevitably face unforeseen complications and will need to adapt appropriately. One of the many insights I gained as a member of the National Guard and by serving in war-time was the incredible creativity medical specialists in the Armed Forces employ to deliver health care services to our wounded soldiers on the ground. I was part of a team that was saving lives under incredibly difficult circumstances—sometimes while under heavy fire and with only the most basic of resources. I am now interested in how I can use these skills to deliver health care in similar circumstances where basic medical infrastructure is lacking. While there is seemingly little in common between the deserts of Fallujah and rural Wyoming, where I’m currently working as a volunteer first responder in a small town located more than 60 miles from the nearest hospital, I see a lot of potential uses for the skills that I gained as a National Guardsman. As I learned from my father, who worked with Doctors Without Borders for a number of years, there is quite a bit in common between my field of knowledge from the military and working in post-conflict zones. I feel I have a unique experience from which to draw as I embark on my medical school journey, experiences that can be applied both here and abroad.

In ten years’ time, I hope to be trained in the field of emergency medicine, which, surprisingly, is a specialization that is actually lacking here in the United States as compared to similarly developed countries. I hope to conduct research in the field of health care infrastructure and work with government agencies and legislators to find creative solutions to improving access to emergency facilities in currently underserved areas of the United States, with an aim towards providing comprehensive policy reports and recommendations on how the US can once again be the world leader in health outcomes. While the problems inherent in our health care system are not one-dimensional and require a dynamic approach, one of the solutions as I see it is to think less in terms of state-of-the-art facilities and more in terms of access to primary care. Much of the care that I provide as a first responder and volunteer is extremely effective and also relatively cheap. More money is always helpful when facing a complex social and political problem, but we must think of solutions above and beyond more money and more taxes. In ten years I want to be a key player in the health care debate in this country and offering innovative solutions to delivering high quality and cost-effective health care to all our nation’s citizens, especially to those in rural and otherwise underserved areas.

Of course, my policy interests do not replace my passion for helping others and delivering emergency medicine. As a doctor, I hope to continue serving in areas of the country that, for one reason or another, are lagging behind in basic health care infrastructure. Eventually, I would also like to take my knowledge and talents abroad and serve in the Peace Corps or Doctors Without Borders.

In short, I see the role of physicians in society as multifunctional: they are not only doctors who heal, they are also leaders, innovators, social scientists, and patriots. Although my path to medical school has not always been the most direct, my varied and circuitous journey has given me a set of skills and experiences that many otherwise qualified applicants lack. I have no doubt that the next ten years will be similarly unpredictable, but I can assure you that no matter what obstacles I face, my goal will remain the same. I sincerely hope to begin the next phase of my journey at Brown University. Thank you for your kind attention.

Additional Tips for a Successful Medical School Essay

• Regardless of the prompt, you should always address the question of why you want to go to medical school in your essay.
• Try to always give concrete examples rather than make general statements. If you say that you have perseverance, describe an event in your life that demonstrates perseverance.
• There should be an overall message or theme in your essay. In the example above, the theme is overcoming unexpected obstacles.
• Make sure you check and recheck for spelling and grammar!
• Unless you’re very sure you can pull it off, it is usually not a good idea to use humor or to employ the skills you learned in creative writing class in your personal statement. While you want to paint a picture, you don’t want to be too poetic or literary.
• Turn potential weaknesses into positives. As in the example above, address any potential weaknesses in your application and make them strengths, if possible. If you have low MCAT scores or something else that can’t be easily explained or turned into a positive, simply don’t mention it.

Medical School Essay Three

The roots of my desire to become a physician are, thankfully, not around the bedside of a sick family member or in a hospital, but rather on a 10-acre plot of land outside of a small town in Northwest Arkansas. I loved raising and exhibiting cattle, so every morning before the bus arrived at 7 a.m. I was in the barn feeding, checking cattle for any health issues and washing the show heifers. These early mornings and my experiences on a farm not only taught me the value of hard work, but ignited my interest in the body, albeit bovine at the time. It was by a working chute that I learned the functions of reproductive hormones as we utilized them for assisted reproduction and artificial insemination; it was by giving vaccinations to prevent infection that I learned about bacteria and the germ theory of disease; it was beside a stillborn calf before the sun had risen that I was exposed to the frailty of life.

Facing the realities of disease and death daily from an early age, I developed a strong sense of pragmatism out of necessity. There is no place for abstractions or euphemisms about life and death when treating a calf’s pneumonia in the pouring rain during winter. Witnessing the sometimes harsh realities of life on a farm did not instill within me an attitude of jaded inevitability of death. Instead, it germinated a responsibility to protect life to the best of my abilities, cure what ailments I can and alleviate as much suffering as possible while recognizing that sometimes nothing can be done.

I first approached human health at the age of nine through beef nutrition and food safety. Learning the roles of nutrients such as zinc, iron, protein and B-vitamins in the human body as well as the dangers of food-borne illness through the Beef Ambassador program shifted my interest in the body to a new species. Talking with consumers about every facet of the origins of food, I realized that the topics that most interested me were those that pertained to human health. In college, while I connected with people over samples of beef and answered their questions, I also realized that it is not enough simply to have adequate knowledge. Ultimately knowledge is of little use if it is not digestible to those who receive it. So my goal as a future clinical physician is not only to illuminate the source of an affliction and provide treatment for patients, but take care to ensure the need for understanding by both patient and family is met.

I saw this combination of care and understanding while volunteering in an emergency room, where I was also exposed to other aspects and players in the medical field. While assisting a nurse perform a bladder scan and witnessing technicians carry out an echocardiogram or CT scan, I learned the important roles that other professionals who do not wear white coats have in today’s medical field. Medicine is a team sport, and coordinating the efforts of each of these players is crucial for the successful execution of patient care. It is my goal to serve as the leader of this healthcare unit and unify a team of professionals to provide the highest quality care for patients. Perhaps most importantly my time at the VA showed me the power a smile and an open ear can have with people. On the long walk to radiology, talking with patients about their military service and families always seemed to take their mind off the reason for their visit, if only for a few minutes. This served as a reminder that we are helping people with pasts and dreams, rather than simply remedying patients’ symptoms.

Growing up in a small town, I never held aspirations of world travel when I was young. But my time abroad revealed to me the state of healthcare in developing countries and fostered a previously unknown interest in global health. During my first trip abroad to Ghana, my roommate became ill with a severe case of traveler’s diarrhea. In the rural north of the country near the Sahara, the options for healthcare were limited; he told me how our professor was forced to bribe employees to bypass long lines and even recounted how doctors took a bag of saline off the line of another patient to give to him. During a service trip to a rural community in Nicaragua, I encountered patients with preventable and easily treatable diseases that, due to poverty and lack of access, were left untreated for months or years at a time. I was discouraged by the state of healthcare in these countries and wondered what could be done to help. I plan to continue to help provide access to healthcare in rural parts of developing countries, and hopefully as a physician with an agricultural background I can approach public health and food security issues in a multifaceted and holistic manner.

My time on a cattle farm taught me how to work hard to pursue my interests, but also fueled my appetite for knowledge about the body and instilled within me a firm sense of practicality. Whether in a clinic, operating room or pursuing public and global health projects, I plan to bring this work ethic and pragmatism to all of my endeavors. My agricultural upbringing has produced a foundation of skills and values that I am confident will readily transplant into my chosen career. Farming is my early passion, but medicine is my future.

Medical School Essay Four

I am a white, cisgender, and heterosexual female who has been afforded many privileges: I was raised by parents with significant financial resources, I have traveled the world, and I received top-quality high school and college educations. I do not wish to be addressed or recognized in any special way; all I ask is to be treated with respect.

As for my geographic origin, I was born and raised in the rural state of Maine. Since graduating from college, I have been living in my home state, working and giving back to the community that has given me so much. I could not be happier here; I love the down-to-earth people, the unhurried pace of life, and the easy access to the outdoors. While I am certainly excited to move elsewhere in the country for medical school and continue to explore new places, I will always self-identify as a Mainer as being from Maine is something I take great pride in. I am proud of my family ties to the state (which date back to the 1890’s), I am proud of the state’s commitment to preserving its natural beauty, and I am particularly proud of my slight Maine accent (we don’t pronounce our r’s). From the rocky coastline and rugged ski mountains to the locally-grown food and great restaurants, it is no wonder Maine is nicknamed, "Vacationland.” Yet, Maine is so much more than just a tourist destination. The state is dotted with wonderful communities in which to live, communities like the one where I grew up.

Perhaps not surprisingly, I plan to return to Maine after residency. I want to raise a family and establish my medical practice here. We certainly could use more doctors! Even though Maine is a terrific place to live, the state is facing a significant doctor shortage. Today, we are meeting less than half of our need for primary care providers. To make matters worse, many of our physicians are close to retirement age. Yet, according to the AAMC, only 53 Maine residents matriculated into medical school last year! Undoubtedly, Maine is in need of young doctors who are committed to working long term in underserved areas. As my primary career goal is to return to my much adored home state and do my part to help fill this need, I have a vested interest in learning more about rural medicine during medical school.

I was raised in Cumberland, Maine, a coastal town of 7,000 just north of Portland. With its single stoplight and general store (where it would be unusual to visit without running into someone you know), Cumberland is the epitome of a small New England town. It truly was the perfect place to grow up. According to the most recent census, nearly a third of the town’s population is under 18 and more than 75% of households contain children, two statistics which speak to the family-centric nature of Cumberland’s community. Recently rated Maine's safest town, Cumberland is the type of place where you allow your kindergartener to bike alone to school, leave your house unlocked while at work, and bring home-cooked food to your sick neighbors and their children. Growing up in such a safe, close-knit, and supportive community instilled in me the core values of compassion, trustworthiness, and citizenship. These three values guide me every day and will continue to guide me through medical school and my career in medicine.

As a medical student and eventual physician, my compassion will guide me to become a provider who cares for more than just the physical well-being of my patients. I will also commit myself to my patients’ emotional, spiritual, and social well-being and make it a priority to take into account the unique values and beliefs of each patient. By also demonstrating my trustworthiness during every encounter, I will develop strong interpersonal relationships with those whom I serve. As a doctor once wisely said, “A patient does not care how much you know until he knows how much you care.”

My citizenship will guide me to serve my community and to encourage my classmates and colleagues to do the same. We will be taught in medical school to be healers, scientists, and educators. I believe that, in addition, as students and as physicians, we have the responsibility to use our medical knowledge, research skills, and teaching abilities to benefit more than just our patients. We must also commit ourselves to improving the health and wellness of those living in our communities by participating in public events (i.e by donating our medical services), lobbying for better access to healthcare for the underprivileged, and promoting wellness campaigns. As a medical student and eventual physician, my compassion, trustworthiness, and citizenship will drive me to improve the lives of as many individuals as I can.

Cumberland instilled in me important core values and afforded me a wonderful childhood. However, I recognize that my hometown is not perfect. For one, the population is shockingly homogenous, at least as far as demographics go. As of the 2010 census, 97.2% of the residents of Cumberland were white. Only 4.1% of residents speak a language other than English at home and even fewer were born in another country. Essentially everybody who identified with a religion identified as some denomination of Christian. My family was one of maybe five Jewish families in the town. Additionally, nearly all the town’s residents graduated from high school (98.1%), are free of disability (93.8%), and live above the poverty line (95.8%). Efforts to attract diverse families to Cumberland is one improvement that I believe would make the community a better place in which to live. Diversity in background (and in thought) is desirable in any community as living, learning, and working alongside diverse individuals helps us develop new perspectives, enhances our social development, provides us with a larger frame of reference, and improves our understanding of our place in society.

Medical School Essay Five

“How many of you received the flu vaccine this year?” I asked my Bricks 4 Kidz class, where I volunteer to teach elementary students introductory science and math principles using Lego blocks. “What’s a flu vaccine?” they asked in confusion. Surprised, I briefly explained the influenza vaccine and its purpose for protection. My connection to children and their health extends to medical offices, clinics and communities where I have gained experience and insight into medicine, confirming my goal of becoming a physician.

My motivation to pursue a career in medicine developed when my mother, who was diagnosed with Lupus, underwent a kidney transplant surgery and suffered multiple complications. I recall the fear and anxiety I felt as a child because I misunderstood her chronic disease. This prompted me to learn more about the science of medicine. In high school, I observed patients plagued with acute and chronic kidney disease while briefly exploring various fields of medicine through a Mentorship in Medicine summer program at my local hospital. In addition to shadowing nephrologists in a hospital and clinical setting, I scrubbed into the operating room, viewed the radiology department, celebrated the miracle of birth in the delivery room, and quietly observed a partial autopsy in pathology. I saw many patients confused about their diagnoses. I was impressed by the compassion of the physicians and the time they took to reassure and educate their patients.

Further experiences in medicine throughout and after college shaped a desire to practice in underserved areas. While coloring and reading with children in the patient area at a Family Health Center, I witnessed family medicine physicians diligently serve patients from low-income communities. On a medical/dental mission trip to the Philippines, I partnered with local doctors to serve and distribute medical supplies to rural schools and communities. At one impoverished village, I held a malnourished two-year old boy suffering from cerebral palsy and cardiorespiratory disease. His family could not afford to take him to the nearest pediatrician, a few hours away by car, for treatment. Overwhelmed, I cried as we left the village. Many people were suffering through pain and disease due to limited access to medicine. But this is not rare; there are many people suffering due to inadequate access/accessibility around the world, even in my hometown. One physician may not be able to change the status of underserved communities, however, one can alleviate some of the suffering.

Dr. X, my mentor and supervisor, taught me that the practice of medicine is both a science and an art. As a medical assistant in a pediatric office, I am learning about the patient-physician relationship and the meaningful connection with people that medicine provides. I interact with patients and their families daily. Newborn twins were one of the first patients I helped, and I look forward to seeing their development at successive visits. A young boy who endured a major cardiac surgery was another patient I connected with, seeing his smiling face in the office often as he transitioned from the hospital to his home. I also helped many excited, college-bound teenagers with requests for medical records in order to matriculate. This is the art of medicine – the ability to build relationships with patients and have an important and influential role in their lives, from birth to adulthood and beyond.

In addition, medicine encompasses patient-centered care, such as considering and addressing concerns. While taking patient vitals, I grew discouraged when parents refused the influenza vaccine and could not understand their choices. With my experience in scientific research, I conducted an informal yet insightful study. Over one hundred families were surveyed about their specific reasons for refusing the flu vaccine. I sought feedback on patients’ level of understanding about vaccinations and its interactions with the human immune system. Through this project, I learned the importance of understanding patient’s concerns in order to reassure them through medicine. I also learned the value of communicating with patients, such as explaining the purpose of a recommended vaccine. I hope to further this by attending medical school to become a physician focused on patient-centered care, learning from and teaching my community.

Children have been a common thread in my pursuit of medicine, from perceiving medicine through child-like eyes to interacting daily with children in a medical office. My diverse experiences in patient interaction and the practice of medicine inspire me to become a physician, a path that requires perseverance and passion. Physicians are life-long learners and teachers, educating others whether it is on vaccinations or various diseases. This vocation also requires preparation, and I eagerly look forward to continually learning and growing in medical school and beyond.

To learn more about what to expect from the study of medicine, check out our Study Medicine in the US section.

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How To Avoid The 5 Most Common Medical Essay Writing Mistakes

Some of the most common medical essay writing mistakes can be avoided with proper planning, practice and presentation. Here’s how to improve your essay writing skills and give yourself the best chance of writing a winning essay on exam day.

1. PAY ATTENTION TO ESSAY STRUCTURE

The traditional essay structure includes three key sections: an introduction, several paragraphs outlining the core arguments, and a conclusion.

Your introduction should briefly outline what the essay will cover. Within this, you should include a ‘thesis statement’ which articulates the main idea or argument of your essay.

The body paragraphs should begin with a topic sentence, which outlines the focus of the paragraph, and the following sentences in the paragraph need to develop the idea in the topic sentence with clear evidence and examples. Finally, aim to wrap up everything nicely in your conclusion without repeating any arguments or introducing new ideas.

If you stick to this essay formula, your arguments will be clear and well-structured – with plenty room for development.

Some tips to help you pay attention to the essay structure include:

• Plan – before you start writing, sketch out a plan which includes notes for the three key sections
• Write your introduction last – writing the ‘perfect’ introduction can take up a lot of time and energy – particularly when you’re writing under pressure; writing your introduction last can be helpful because you already know exactly what your essay will be about
• Practice – make sure you have written several practice essays in the traditional essay format before you start and try to get your hands on some samples – so you have a comparable standard

2. WORK ON YOUR GRAMMAR, SPELLING AND PUNCTUATION

Spelling and grammatical errors can result in lost points, regardless of how strong your ideas are. Having good ideas is one thing, but articulating them clearly is something else entirely.

If English is your second language, take time to learn and study the craft of writing. Read other people’s writing and study sentence structure. Develop your vocabulary in general but also in relation to the subject you’re writing about.

Tips to help you improve your writing skills include:

• Read widely – read articles, textbooks and writing in your medical field as well as outside it
• Develop your vocabulary – read a variety of medical materials so you can enhance your medical terminology and understand how these terms are used in context
• Practice – again, you will only be able to develop your writing skills and vocabulary through practice, practice, and more practice

3. STAY FOCUSED

Sometimes, you might feel tempted to write about a topic or idea you’re comfortable with, instead of addressing what the essay question is about. You could write an amazing essay, but if it doesn’t address the essay question or topic then you will lose marks.

Tips to help you stay focused and ensure you are adequately addressing the essay question include:

• Circle the keywords in the question – look at the themes and ideas in these keywords and use these to help you develop your focus
• Don’t try to rewrite past essays – try not to rewrite any practice essays you may have written in the past (unless they are 100% relevant to the topic)
• Practice brainstorming – get your hands on some essay questions or quotes and practice the brainstorming aspect to help it seem less daunting

4. ADDRESS THE KEY SELECTION CRITERIA

Whenever you write an essay as part of your exams, there will be specific criteria that your essay marker will use to assess your essay. It’s vital you familiarise yourself with this criterion and keep it top of mind when you’re writing your essay.

The essay writing criteria contains general requirements like proper grammar, being able to demonstrate a range of arguments related to the topic, and a clear conclusion. But it will also include discipline-specific requirements, such as discussions of the socio-political, historical and cultural themes related to your medical field and being able to demonstrate an understanding of the recovery model, for example.

Tips to help you address the key selection criteria include:

• Think of the criteria as a checklist – and confirm you have ticked off everything in the list before you can submit your essay
• Ensure you have the latest criteria – criteria can change, so be certain that you’re referring to the latest version when you’re practicing
• Write practice essays that address the key selection criteria – if you haven’t practiced writing an essay that addresses the criteria before your final essay, you may struggle to do this on the day

5. STAY CALM ON EXAM DAY

It’s normal to have some nerves on exam day, but if you find yourself in a panic, you might procrastinate, ramble or struggle to formulate clear sentences.

The more you practice essay writing, the more confident in your abilities you’ll become – meaning you’ll be more likely to cope with any type of question that comes your way on the big day.

Tips to help you stay calm include:

• Deep breathing – if you’re feeling very anxious, put down your pen, close your eyes and take a series of deep breaths until the feeling passes
• Stay positive – when negative thoughts arise they can make you feel stressed and anxious, so develop a series of positive messages to help you overcome your nerves
• Practice writing under pressure – the best way to reduce the likelihood of nerves jeopardising your success is to practice under strict exam conditions

Other tips to help you improve your medical essay writing skills

• Pay attention to your handwriting – clear handwriting wins over poor handwriting every time, so pay attention to your handwriting, and practice writing clearly
• Be consistent with your tense – choose one tense, usually third person – you may not lose marks for writing in the first person but generally third person is more formal, convincing and relevant to the academic style
• Opt for quality over quantity – don’t assume that more words will get you more marks; you’ll be marked on the quality of your arguments, how convincing they are and how well they address the key selection criteria
• Avoid unnecessary complications – awkward vocabulary, long sentences and complex terminology can all complicate your essay and make it harder for your examiner to understand your ideas

For almost two years, I’ve been helping Psych Scene course candidates to improve their medical essay writing skills with training, personalised feedback and suggestions for improvement on their practice essays. If you’d like some help with your essay, please contact me.

Medical School Examples

Craft a Winning Medical School Essay with Examples and Proven Tips

Published on: May 8, 2023

Last updated on: Jan 31, 2024

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Are you dreaming of becoming a doctor or a health care professional? 

The first step towards achieving that goal is to get accepted into a top-tier medical school. 

But with so many other qualified medical students competing for the same spot, how do you stand out from the crowd? 

It all starts with your medical school essay. 

Your essay is your opportunity to your unique qualities, experiences, and aspirations. 

In this blog, we'll provide you with examples that will help you catch the attention of admissions committees. 

From purpose to common mistakes to avoid, we'll cover everything you need to get accepted into the medical school of your dreams. 

So, let's dive in!

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Types of Medical School Examples 

Medical school essays come in many different forms, each with its own unique requirements and purpose.

In this section, we'll discuss some of the most common types of medical school essays and what you need to know to write them successfully.

Personal Statements 

Personal statements are the most common type of medical school essay. They are usually a one-page essay that introduces you to the admissions officers. 

It explains why you want to pursue medicine as a career. Personal statements should be engaging, and memorable, and show off your unique qualities.

An outline offers a framework to help you craft a compelling narrative that showcases your strengths and experiences.

Check out this personal statement example that can help future physicians getting into the schools of their dreams.

Medical School Personal Statement Examples pdf

Secondary Essays 

Secondary essays are additional essays that some medical schools require in addition to the personal statement. 

They often ask specific questions about your background, experiences, or interests. They give you an opportunity to show off your future patient care and problem-solving skills.

Here is a brief example of a secondary application medical school essay:

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Diversity Essays 

Diversity essays ask you to write about your experiences with diversity and how they have influenced you to pursue a career and your interest in medicine. 

These essays are becoming increasingly common in medical school applications as schools strive to build a more diverse and inclusive student body.

Good Medical School Essay Examples 

Are you struggling to write a standout medical school essay? They say that the best way to learn is by example. That's especially true when it comes to public health school essays. 

We'll provide you with some of the best examples to help you craft an essay that will help your career in medicine.

Medical College Essay Examples

Personal Statement Medical School Examples Pdf

Medical School Covid Essay Examples

Challenging Medical School Essay Examples 

Writing a medical school essay is more than just telling a story about yourself. It's an opportunity to demonstrate your critical thinking and analytical skills. 

In this section, we'll highlight some of the challenging medical school essay examples. This will give you a sense of what admissions committees are looking for. You can learn how to exceed those expectations by writing a successful medical school essay.

Greatest Challenge Medical School Essay Examples

Successful Medicine Personal Statement Examples

Medical School Scholarship Essay Examples

Medical School Essay Examples for Different Schools 

Each medical school has its own unique mission, values, and admissions criteria, and your essay should reflect that. 

In this section, we'll explore how to tailor your medical school essay for different schools and showcase some examples of successful essays.

Let’s explore these Stanford and Harvard medical school essay examples:

Medical School Personal Statement Examples Harvard

Medical School Personal Statement Examples Stanford

Tips on Crafting an Excellent Medical School Personal Statement 

The medical school personal statement is your opportunity to showcase your unique qualities and experiences. 

Here are some tips to help you craft an excellent personal statement:

Start Early 

Don't wait until the last minute to start writing your personal statement. Give yourself plenty of time to brainstorm, write, and revise your essay. Starting early also allows you to get feedback from mentors, professors, or peers.

Focus on Your Story 

Your personal statement should tell a story that showcases your journey to medicine. Highlight the experiences and qualities that have led you to pursue a career in medicine. Tell them how you plan to use your skills to make a difference.

Be Specific 

Use specific examples to illustrate your experiences and achievements. Don't just list your accomplishments, but show how they have prepared you for a career in medicine. Use concrete details to make your essay more engaging and memorable.

Show, Don't Tell 

Instead of simply stating your qualities, show them through your experiences and actions. For example, don’t say you're a team player. Describe a time when you worked effectively in a team to achieve a goal.

Tailor Your Essay to the School 

As mentioned earlier, each medical school has its own unique mission and values. Tailor your personal statement to each school to demonstrate your fit with their program and values.

Mistakes to Avoid in a Medical School Personal Statement 

When it comes to your medical school personal statement, there are some common mistakes you should avoid:

Avoid using cliched phrases and ideas that are overused in personal statements. Admissions committees want to see your unique perspective and experiences. They do not want generic statements that could apply to anyone.

Negativity 

Don't focus on negative experiences or aspects of your life in your personal statement. Instead, focus on your strengths and how you have grown from challenges.

Lack of Focus 

Make sure your personal statement has a clear focus and theme. Don't try to cover too many topics or experiences in one essay. Instead, focus on one or two experiences that are meaningful to you and illustrate your journey to medicine.

Too Formal or Informal Tone 

Make sure your personal statement strikes the right tone. Avoid being too formal or using overly complex language. Also, avoid being too informal or using slang.

Plagiarism 

Never copy someone else's personal statement or use a template to write your own. Admissions committees can easily spot plagiarism, and it will result in an immediate rejection.

Grammatical and Spelling Errors

Proofread your personal statement thoroughly for grammatical and spelling errors. Even a few small errors can detract from the overall quality of your essay.

Lack of Authenticity 

Be true to yourself in your personal statement. Don't try to present an image of yourself that is not authentic or that you think the admissions committee wants to see. Be honest and genuine in your writing.

In conclusion, crafting a winning medical school essay is a crucial step toward securing admission to the medical school of your dreams. 

This blog has provided examples of essays along with tips to craft an excellent medical school personal statement. By avoiding mistakes, you can increase your chances of standing out from the crowd and impressing the admissions committee. 

Struggling with your medical school essays or college papers? Look no further!

Our college paper writing service specializes in crafting exceptional papers tailored to your academic needs, including medical school essays. And for an extra boost in your writing tasks, don't forget to explore our AI essay generator .

Elevate your academic performance with our medical school essay writing service and unlock the potential of our AI essay tools.

Get started today!

Frequently Asked Question (FAQs)

What is the ideal med school personal statement word limit.

There is no set length for a medical school personal statement, but most schools typically require a personal statement of 500-800 words.

How do I choose a topic for my medical school essay?

Choose a topic that showcases your unique perspective and experiences, and illustrates your journey to medicine. Consider what makes you stand out and what you are passionate about.

Should I mention my grades and test scores in my medical school essay?

It is not necessary to mention your grades and test scores in your medical school essay as they are already included in your application. Instead, focus on showcasing your unique qualities, experiences, and perspective.

Can I get help with writing my medical school essay?

Yes, there are various resources available to help you with writing your medical school essay. Consider seeking help from a writing tutor, career services office, or professional writing service like ours.

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As a Digital Content Strategist, Nova Allison has eight years of experience in writing both technical and scientific content. With a focus on developing online content plans that engage audiences, Nova strives to write pieces that are not only informative but captivating as well.

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How to Write a Medical Research Paper

Last Updated: February 5, 2024 Approved

This article was co-authored by Chris M. Matsko, MD . Dr. Chris M. Matsko is a retired physician based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. With over 25 years of medical research experience, Dr. Matsko was awarded the Pittsburgh Cornell University Leadership Award for Excellence. He holds a BS in Nutritional Science from Cornell University and an MD from the Temple University School of Medicine in 2007. Dr. Matsko earned a Research Writing Certification from the American Medical Writers Association (AMWA) in 2016 and a Medical Writing & Editing Certification from the University of Chicago in 2017. wikiHow marks an article as reader-approved once it receives enough positive feedback. In this case, 89% of readers who voted found the article helpful, earning it our reader-approved status. This article has been viewed 201,989 times.

Writing a medical research paper is similar to writing other research papers in that you want to use reliable sources, write in a clear and organized style, and offer a strong argument for all conclusions you present. In some cases the research you discuss will be data you have actually collected to answer your research questions. Understanding proper formatting, citations, and style will help you write and informative and respected paper.

Researching Your Paper

• Pick something that really interests you to make the research more fun.
• Choose a topic that has unanswered questions and propose solutions.

• Quantitative studies consist of original research performed by the writer. These research papers will need to include sections like Hypothesis (or Research Question), Previous Findings, Method, Limitations, Results, Discussion, and Application.
• Synthesis papers review the research already published and analyze it. They find weaknesses and strengths in the research, apply it to a specific situation, and then indicate a direction for future research.

• Keep track of your sources. Write down all publication information necessary for citation: author, title of article, title of book or journal, publisher, edition, date published, volume number, issue number, page number, and anything else pertaining to your source. A program like Endnote can help you keep track of your sources.
• Take detailed notes as you read. Paraphrase information in your own words or if you copy directly from the article or book, indicate that these are direct quotes by using quotation marks to prevent plagiarism.
• Be sure to keep all of your notes with the correct source.
• Your professor and librarians can also help you find good resources.

• Keep all of your notes in a physical folder or in a digitized form on the computer.
• Start to form the basic outline of your paper using the notes you have collected.

Writing Your Paper

• Start with bullet points and then add in notes you've taken from references that support your ideas. [1] X Trustworthy Source PubMed Central Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health Go to source
• A common way to format research papers is to follow the IMRAD format. This dictates the structure of your paper in the following order: I ntroduction, M ethods, R esults, a nd D iscussion. [2] X Research source
• The outline is just the basic structure of your paper. Don't worry if you have to rearrange a few times to get it right.
• Ask others to look over your outline and get feedback on the organization.
• Know the audience you are writing for and adjust your style accordingly. [3] X Research source

• Use a standard font type and size, such as Times New Roman 12 point font.
• Double-space your paper.
• If necessary, create a cover page. Most schools require a cover page of some sort. Include your main title, running title (often a shortened version of your main title), author's name, course name, and semester.

• Break up information into sections and subsections and address one main point per section.
• Include any figures or data tables that support your main ideas.
• For a quantitative study, state the methods used to obtain results.

• Clearly state and summarize the main points of your research paper.
• Discuss how this research contributes to the field and why it is important. [4] X Research source
• Highlight potential applications of the theory if appropriate.
• Propose future directions that build upon the research you have presented. [5] X Research source
• Keep the introduction and discussion short, and spend more time explaining the methods and results.

• State why the problem is important to address.
• Discuss what is currently known and what is lacking in the field.
• State the objective of your paper.
• Keep the introduction short.

• Highlight the purpose of the paper and the main conclusions.
• State why your conclusions are important.
• Be concise in your summary of the paper.
• Show that you have a solid study design and a high-quality data set.
• Abstracts are usually one paragraph and between 250 – 500 words.

• Unless otherwise directed, use the American Medical Association (AMA) style guide to properly format citations.
• Add citations at end of a sentence to indicate that you are using someone else's idea. Use these throughout your research paper as needed. They include the author's last name, year of publication, and page number.
• Compile your reference list and add it to the end of your paper.
• Use a citation program if you have access to one to simplify the process.

• Continually revise your paper to make sure it is structured in a logical way.
• Proofread your paper for spelling and grammatical errors.
• Make sure you are following the proper formatting guidelines provided for the paper.
• Have others read your paper to proofread and check for clarity. Revise as needed.

Expert Q&A

• Ask your professor for help if you are stuck or confused about any part of your research paper. They are familiar with the style and structure of papers and can provide you with more resources. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
• Refer to your professor's specific guidelines. Some instructors modify parts of a research paper to better fit their assignment. Others may request supplementary details, such as a synopsis for your research project . Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0
• Set aside blocks of time specifically for writing each day. Thanks Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

• Do not plagiarize. Plagiarism is using someone else's work, words, or ideas and presenting them as your own. It is important to cite all sources in your research paper, both through internal citations and on your reference page. Thanks Helpful 4 Not Helpful 2

You Might Also Like

• ↑ http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3178846/
• ↑ http://owl.excelsior.edu/research-and-citations/outlining/outlining-imrad/
• ↑ http://china.elsevier.com/ElsevierDNN/Portals/7/How%20to%20write%20a%20world-class%20paper.pdf
• ↑ http://intqhc.oxfordjournals.org/content/16/3/191
• ↑ http://www.ruf.rice.edu/~bioslabs/tools/report/reportform.html#form

About This Article

To write a medical research paper, research your topic thoroughly and compile your data. Next, organize your notes and create a strong outline that breaks up the information into sections and subsections, addressing one main point per section. Write the results and discussion sections first to go over your findings, then write the introduction to state your objective and provide background information. Finally, write the abstract, which concisely summarizes the article by highlighting the main points. For tips on formatting and using citations, read on! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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Sat / act prep online guides and tips, getting college essay help: important do's and don’ts.

College Essays

If you grow up to be a professional writer, everything you write will first go through an editor before being published. This is because the process of writing is really a process of re-writing —of rethinking and reexamining your work, usually with the help of someone else. So what does this mean for your student writing? And in particular, what does it mean for very important, but nonprofessional writing like your college essay? Should you ask your parents to look at your essay? Pay for an essay service?

If you are wondering what kind of help you can, and should, get with your personal statement, you've come to the right place! In this article, I'll talk about what kind of writing help is useful, ethical, and even expected for your college admission essay . I'll also point out who would make a good editor, what the differences between editing and proofreading are, what to expect from a good editor, and how to spot and stay away from a bad one.

Table of Contents

What Kind of Help for Your Essay Can You Get?

What's Good Editing?

What should an editor do for you, what kind of editing should you avoid, proofreading, what's good proofreading, what kind of proofreading should you avoid.

What Do Colleges Think Of You Getting Help With Your Essay?

Who Can/Should Help You?

Advice for editors.

Should You Pay Money For Essay Editing?

The Bottom Line

What's next, what kind of help with your essay can you get.

Rather than talking in general terms about "help," let's first clarify the two different ways that someone else can improve your writing . There is editing, which is the more intensive kind of assistance that you can use throughout the whole process. And then there's proofreading, which is the last step of really polishing your final product.

Let me go into some more detail about editing and proofreading, and then explain how good editors and proofreaders can help you."

Editing is helping the author (in this case, you) go from a rough draft to a finished work . Editing is the process of asking questions about what you're saying, how you're saying it, and how you're organizing your ideas. But not all editing is good editing . In fact, it's very easy for an editor to cross the line from supportive to overbearing and over-involved.

Ability to clarify assignments. A good editor is usually a good writer, and certainly has to be a good reader. For example, in this case, a good editor should make sure you understand the actual essay prompt you're supposed to be answering.

Open-endedness. Good editing is all about asking questions about your ideas and work, but without providing answers. It's about letting you stick to your story and message, and doesn't alter your point of view.

Think of an editor as a great travel guide. It can show you the many different places your trip could take you. It should explain any parts of the trip that could derail your trip or confuse the traveler. But it never dictates your path, never forces you to go somewhere you don't want to go, and never ignores your interests so that the trip no longer seems like it's your own. So what should good editors do?

Help Brainstorm Topics

Sometimes it's easier to bounce thoughts off of someone else. This doesn't mean that your editor gets to come up with ideas, but they can certainly respond to the various topic options you've come up with. This way, you're less likely to write about the most boring of your ideas, or to write about something that isn't actually important to you.

If you're wondering how to come up with options for your editor to consider, check out our guide to brainstorming topics for your college essay .

Help Revise Your Drafts

Here, your editor can't upset the delicate balance of not intervening too much or too little. It's tricky, but a great way to think about it is to remember: editing is about asking questions, not giving answers .

Revision questions should point out:

• Places where more detail or more description would help the reader connect with your essay
• Places where structure and logic don't flow, losing the reader's attention
• Places where there aren't transitions between paragraphs, confusing the reader
• Moments where your narrative or the arguments you're making are unclear

But pointing to potential problems is not the same as actually rewriting—editors let authors fix the problems themselves.

Bad editing is usually very heavy-handed editing. Instead of helping you find your best voice and ideas, a bad editor changes your writing into their own vision.

You may be dealing with a bad editor if they:

• Add material (examples, descriptions) that doesn't come from you
• Use a thesaurus to make your college essay sound "more mature"
• Add meaning or insight to the essay that doesn't come from you
• Tell you what to say and how to say it
• Write sentences, phrases, and paragraphs for you
• Change your voice in the essay so it no longer sounds like it was written by a teenager

Colleges can tell the difference between a 17-year-old's writing and a 50-year-old's writing. Not only that, they have access to your SAT or ACT Writing section, so they can compare your essay to something else you wrote. Writing that's a little more polished is great and expected. But a totally different voice and style will raise questions.

Where's the Line Between Helpful Editing and Unethical Over-Editing?

Sometimes it's hard to tell whether your college essay editor is doing the right thing. Here are some guidelines for staying on the ethical side of the line.

• An editor should say that the opening paragraph is kind of boring, and explain what exactly is making it drag. But it's overstepping for an editor to tell you exactly how to change it.
• An editor should point out where your prose is unclear or vague. But it's completely inappropriate for the editor to rewrite that section of your essay.
• An editor should let you know that a section is light on detail or description. But giving you similes and metaphors to beef up that description is a no-go.

Proofreading (also called copy-editing) is checking for errors in the last draft of a written work. It happens at the end of the process and is meant as the final polishing touch. Proofreading is meticulous and detail-oriented, focusing on small corrections. It sands off all the surface rough spots that could alienate the reader.

Because proofreading is usually concerned with making fixes on the word or sentence level, this is the only process where someone else can actually add to or take away things from your essay . This is because what they are adding or taking away tends to be one or two misplaced letters.

Laser focus. Proofreading is all about the tiny details, so the ability to really concentrate on finding small slip-ups is a must.

Excellent grammar and spelling skills. Proofreaders need to dot every "i" and cross every "t." Good proofreaders should correct spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and grammar. They should put foreign words in italics and surround quotations with quotation marks. They should check that you used the correct college's name, and that you adhered to any formatting requirements (name and date at the top of the page, uniform font and size, uniform spacing).

Limited interference. A proofreader needs to make sure that you followed any word limits. But if cuts need to be made to shorten the essay, that's your job and not the proofreader's.

A bad proofreader either tries to turn into an editor, or just lacks the skills and knowledge necessary to do the job.

Some signs that you're working with a bad proofreader are:

• If they suggest making major changes to the final draft of your essay. Proofreading happens when editing is already finished.
• If they aren't particularly good at spelling, or don't know grammar, or aren't detail-oriented enough to find someone else's small mistakes.
• If they start swapping out your words for fancier-sounding synonyms, or changing the voice and sound of your essay in other ways. A proofreader is there to check for errors, not to take the 17-year-old out of your writing.

What Do Colleges Think of Your Getting Help With Your Essay?

Admissions officers agree: light editing and proofreading are good—even required ! But they also want to make sure you're the one doing the work on your essay. They want essays with stories, voice, and themes that come from you. They want to see work that reflects your actual writing ability, and that focuses on what you find important.

On the Importance of Editing

Get feedback. Have a fresh pair of eyes give you some feedback. Don't allow someone else to rewrite your essay, but do take advantage of others' edits and opinions when they seem helpful. ( Bates College )

Read your essay aloud to someone. Reading the essay out loud offers a chance to hear how your essay sounds outside your head. This exercise reveals flaws in the essay's flow, highlights grammatical errors and helps you ensure that you are communicating the exact message you intended. ( Dickinson College )

On the Value of Proofreading

Share your essays with at least one or two people who know you well—such as a parent, teacher, counselor, or friend—and ask for feedback. Remember that you ultimately have control over your essays, and your essays should retain your own voice, but others may be able to catch mistakes that you missed and help suggest areas to cut if you are over the word limit. ( Yale University )

Proofread and then ask someone else to proofread for you. Although we want substance, we also want to be able to see that you can write a paper for our professors and avoid careless mistakes that would drive them crazy. ( Oberlin College )

On Watching Out for Too Much Outside Influence

Limit the number of people who review your essay. Too much input usually means your voice is lost in the writing style. ( Carleton College )

Ask for input (but not too much). Your parents, friends, guidance counselors, coaches, and teachers are great people to bounce ideas off of for your essay. They know how unique and spectacular you are, and they can help you decide how to articulate it. Keep in mind, however, that a 45-year-old lawyer writes quite differently from an 18-year-old student, so if your dad ends up writing the bulk of your essay, we're probably going to notice. ( Vanderbilt University )

Now let's talk about some potential people to approach for your college essay editing and proofreading needs. It's best to start close to home and slowly expand outward. Not only are your family and friends more invested in your success than strangers, but they also have a better handle on your interests and personality. This knowledge is key for judging whether your essay is expressing your true self.

Parents or Close Relatives

Your family may be full of potentially excellent editors! Parents are deeply committed to your well-being, and family members know you and your life well enough to offer details or incidents that can be included in your essay. On the other hand, the rewriting process necessarily involves criticism, which is sometimes hard to hear from someone very close to you.

A parent or close family member is a great choice for an editor if you can answer "yes" to the following questions. Is your parent or close relative a good writer or reader? Do you have a relationship where editing your essay won't create conflict? Are you able to constructively listen to criticism and suggestion from the parent?

One suggestion for defusing face-to-face discussions is to try working on the essay over email. Send your parent a draft, have them write you back some comments, and then you can pick which of their suggestions you want to use and which to discard.

Teachers or Tutors

A humanities teacher that you have a good relationship with is a great choice. I am purposefully saying humanities, and not just English, because teachers of Philosophy, History, Anthropology, and any other classes where you do a lot of writing, are all used to reviewing student work.

Moreover, any teacher or tutor that has been working with you for some time, knows you very well and can vet the essay to make sure it "sounds like you."

If your teacher or tutor has some experience with what college essays are supposed to be like, ask them to be your editor. If not, then ask whether they have time to proofread your final draft.

Guidance or College Counselor at Your School

The best thing about asking your counselor to edit your work is that this is their job. This means that they have a very good sense of what colleges are looking for in an application essay.

At the same time, school counselors tend to have relationships with admissions officers in many colleges, which again gives them insight into what works and which college is focused on what aspect of the application.

Unfortunately, in many schools the guidance counselor tends to be way overextended. If your ratio is 300 students to 1 college counselor, you're unlikely to get that person's undivided attention and focus. It is still useful to ask them for general advice about your potential topics, but don't expect them to be able to stay with your essay from first draft to final version.

Friends, Siblings, or Classmates

Although they most likely don't have much experience with what colleges are hoping to see, your peers are excellent sources for checking that your essay is you .

Friends and siblings are perfect for the read-aloud edit. Read your essay to them so they can listen for words and phrases that are stilted, pompous, or phrases that just don't sound like you.

You can even trade essays and give helpful advice on each other's work.

If your editor hasn't worked with college admissions essays very much, no worries! Any astute and attentive reader can still greatly help with your process. But, as in all things, beginners do better with some preparation.

First, your editor should read our advice about how to write a college essay introduction , how to spot and fix a bad college essay , and get a sense of what other students have written by going through some admissions essays that worked .

Then, as they read your essay, they can work through the following series of questions that will help them to guide you.

Introduction Questions

• Is the first sentence a killer opening line? Why or why not?
• Does the introduction hook the reader? Does it have a colorful, detailed, and interesting narrative? Or does it propose a compelling or surprising idea?
• Can you feel the author's voice in the introduction, or is the tone dry, dull, or overly formal? Show the places where the voice comes through.

Essay Body Questions

• Does the essay have a through-line? Is it built around a central argument, thought, idea, or focus? Can you put this idea into your own words?
• How is the essay organized? By logical progression? Chronologically? Do you feel order when you read it, or are there moments where you are confused or lose the thread of the essay?
• Does the essay have both narratives about the author's life and explanations and insight into what these stories reveal about the author's character, personality, goals, or dreams? If not, which is missing?
• Does the essay flow? Are there smooth transitions/clever links between paragraphs? Between the narrative and moments of insight?

Reader Response Questions

• Does the writer's personality come through? Do we know what the speaker cares about? Do we get a sense of "who he or she is"?
• Where did you feel most connected to the essay? Which parts of the essay gave you a "you are there" sensation by invoking your senses? What moments could you picture in your head well?
• Where are the details and examples vague and not specific enough?
• Did you get an "a-ha!" feeling anywhere in the essay? Is there a moment of insight that connected all the dots for you? Is there a good reveal or "twist" anywhere in the essay?
• What are the strengths of this essay? What needs the most improvement?

Should You Pay Money for Essay Editing?

One alternative to asking someone you know to help you with your college essay is the paid editor route. There are two different ways to pay for essay help: a private essay coach or a less personal editing service , like the many proliferating on the internet.

My advice is to think of these options as a last resort rather than your go-to first choice. I'll first go through the reasons why. Then, if you do decide to go with a paid editor, I'll help you decide between a coach and a service.

When to Consider a Paid Editor

In general, I think hiring someone to work on your essay makes a lot of sense if none of the people I discussed above are a possibility for you.

If you can't ask your parents. For example, if your parents aren't good writers, or if English isn't their first language. Or if you think getting your parents to help is going create unnecessary extra conflict in your relationship with them (applying to college is stressful as it is!)

If you can't ask your teacher or tutor. Maybe you don't have a trusted teacher or tutor that has time to look over your essay with focus. Or, for instance, your favorite humanities teacher has very limited experience with college essays and so won't know what admissions officers want to see.

If you can't ask your guidance counselor. This could be because your guidance counselor is way overwhelmed with other students.

If you can't share your essay with those who know you. It might be that your essay is on a very personal topic that you're unwilling to share with parents, teachers, or peers. Just make sure it doesn't fall into one of the bad-idea topics in our article on bad college essays .

If the cost isn't a consideration. Many of these services are quite expensive, and private coaches even more so. If you have finite resources, I'd say that hiring an SAT or ACT tutor (whether it's PrepScholar or someone else) is better way to spend your money . This is because there's no guarantee that a slightly better essay will sufficiently elevate the rest of your application, but a significantly higher SAT score will definitely raise your applicant profile much more.

Should You Hire an Essay Coach?

On the plus side, essay coaches have read dozens or even hundreds of college essays, so they have experience with the format. Also, because you'll be working closely with a specific person, it's more personal than sending your essay to a service, which will know even less about you.

But, on the minus side, you'll still be bouncing ideas off of someone who doesn't know that much about you . In general, if you can adequately get the help from someone you know, there is no advantage to paying someone to help you.

If you do decide to hire a coach, ask your school counselor, or older students that have used the service for recommendations. If you can't afford the coach's fees, ask whether they can work on a sliding scale —many do. And finally, beware those who guarantee admission to your school of choice—essay coaches don't have any special magic that can back up those promises.

Should You Send Your Essay to a Service?

On the plus side, essay editing services provide a similar product to essay coaches, and they cost significantly less . If you have some assurance that you'll be working with a good editor, the lack of face-to-face interaction won't prevent great results.

On the minus side, however, it can be difficult to gauge the quality of the service before working with them . If they are churning through many application essays without getting to know the students they are helping, you could end up with an over-edited essay that sounds just like everyone else's. In the worst case scenario, an unscrupulous service could send you back a plagiarized essay.

Getting recommendations from friends or a school counselor for reputable services is key to avoiding heavy-handed editing that writes essays for you or does too much to change your essay. Including a badly-edited essay like this in your application could cause problems if there are inconsistencies. For example, in interviews it might be clear you didn't write the essay, or the skill of the essay might not be reflected in your schoolwork and test scores.

Should You Buy an Essay Written by Someone Else?

Let me elaborate. There are super sketchy places on the internet where you can simply buy a pre-written essay. Don't do this!

For one thing, you'll be lying on an official, signed document. All college applications make you sign a statement saying something like this:

I certify that all information submitted in the admission process—including the application, the personal essay, any supplements, and any other supporting materials—is my own work, factually true, and honestly presented... I understand that I may be subject to a range of possible disciplinary actions, including admission revocation, expulsion, or revocation of course credit, grades, and degree, should the information I have certified be false. (From the Common Application )

For another thing, if your academic record doesn't match the essay's quality, the admissions officer will start thinking your whole application is riddled with lies.

Admission officers have full access to your writing portion of the SAT or ACT so that they can compare work that was done in proctored conditions with that done at home. They can tell if these were written by different people. Not only that, but there are now a number of search engines that faculty and admission officers can use to see if an essay contains strings of words that have appeared in other essays—you have no guarantee that the essay you bought wasn't also bought by 50 other students.

• You should get college essay help with both editing and proofreading
• A good editor will ask questions about your idea, logic, and structure, and will point out places where clarity is needed
• A good editor will absolutely not answer these questions, give you their own ideas, or write the essay or parts of the essay for you
• A good proofreader will find typos and check your formatting
• All of them agree that getting light editing and proofreading is necessary
• Parents, teachers, guidance or college counselor, and peers or siblings
• If you can't ask any of those, you can pay for college essay help, but watch out for services or coaches who over-edit you work
• Don't buy a pre-written essay! Colleges can tell, and it'll make your whole application sound false.

Ready to start working on your essay? Check out our explanation of the point of the personal essay and the role it plays on your applications and then explore our step-by-step guide to writing a great college essay .

Using the Common Application for your college applications? We have an excellent guide to the Common App essay prompts and useful advice on how to pick the Common App prompt that's right for you . Wondering how other people tackled these prompts? Then work through our roundup of over 130 real college essay examples published by colleges .

Stressed about whether to take the SAT again before submitting your application? Let us help you decide how many times to take this test . If you choose to go for it, we have the ultimate guide to studying for the SAT to give you the ins and outs of the best ways to study.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Trends in Medicine

A blueprint for writing effectively for the health care field.

As a professional working in the health care field, you have valuable information to share with your colleagues and patients—from reporting the latest scientific research and outcomes data, to developing compelling grant proposals, to promoting public health messages. But if your writing isn’t up to par, you could be missing out on important opportunities to convey your point successfully and move readers to action. 

The Importance of Strong Writing Skills  

Clinicians, researchers and allied health care professionals need strong writing skills in order to communicate effectively with their target audiences. Yet, most medical schools and other health care training programs don’t delve into the fundamentals of good writing that is necessary for professional success in a variety of settings. And even science writers and others who have a stronger writing background may not be fully strategic with how they approach their efforts to write for technical and mainstream publications, funding organizations and an array of different audiences. That’s why no matter what your role or your training level, if you communicate through the written word, it can be helpful to fill in the gaps in your knowledge so you can maximize your potential.  

To offer some guidance, Thomas Jehn, PhD, Sosland Director of the Harvard College Writing Program, recently led a Zoom session for Harvard Medical School’s Effective Writing for Health Care program, a one-year certificate program designed to help medical professionals develop and communicate clear written messages for research articles, news and opinion pieces, digital copy and grant proposals.

Approaching Writing as a Process 

“Whenever I work with professionals on the writing they do in their fields, I stress the importance of viewing writing not as a finished product in which we create one gem of a sentence at a time. Instead, I urge people to think of writing as a process of moving from a stage of interior monologue to a stage of communicating with your readers,” Jehn explains, adding that this means going from writer-based prose to reader-based prose. Such a process involves taking both a macro level and a micro level view.  

“The macro level is a bird’s eye view of the big-picture elements of the article, report, proposal or whatever we’re writing,” he says. “This should involve thinking about what you’re trying to communicate and why, as well what evidence you’re presenting, the analysis you present, how you’re sequencing the most important points, how you organize your paragraphs and more.” 

The micro level comes only after all of these larger details are arranged. 

“The micro level requires paying close attention to word choices, cutting needless words, making a sentence clearer and fixing grammar, punctuation and spelling errors,” he says. 

Jehn also stresses that it’s important to leave these micro level issues until the later stage of your writing, since focusing on these details in the early drafting phase can block your creative flow. “Worrying about the micro level issues too early in the process can also be a thorough waste of time since it might well happen that we realize a chunk of what we’ve written needs to be cut because it wasn’t making sense or it all needed to be re-organized, at which point all that time spent on perfecting a sentence or finding the right word was a waste,” he adds. 

Other Writing Tips 

Jehn also shares the following valuable writing tips to help you create a compelling final product: 

Before you begin writing your first draft, try imagining your audience so you can determine what they care about and how to frame your information in a way that will resonate with them. 

“I imagine a worst-case scenario for my readers. I picture them as tired, demanding, irritated and distracted,” Jehn says. “I also imagine that they’ll walk away from what I’ve written if I burden them with ineffective writing.” With all of this in mind, he tries to reduce the cognitive load by choosing words well and keeping his messages clear and concise so they won’t be too difficult to follow.  

Consider your readers’ level of knowledge so you can write in the style and tone that will resonate best with them. If you are writing for clinicians or scientists, you can talk in their language. But if you are writing for a general audience that has little or no medical knowledge, you’ll need to talk in layperson’s terms that they will understand and avoid using jargon. 

Think of your sentences as a way to tell stories to your readers. Even if you’re working with abstract ideas, think of how you can make them more concrete for your reader and engage the reader into the storyline. “For example, try whenever possible to make flesh-and-blood subjects do actions in your sentences rather than using needlessly impersonal and abstract constructions. Readers will be more easily able to visualize your ideas,” Jehn says. Also look through your work for nominalizations, which are verbs or action words that have been turned into nouns, such as turning “argue” into “argument.” Such constructions are passive and can weaken the impact for the reader. While sometimes a nominalization is necessary, whenever possible, try to write the sentence so you’ve changed the nominalization back into its verb.  

Pay attention to patterns in your sentences and paragraphs and make sure you are varying things. Including some shorter sentences and paragraphs within your text can help break up information into smaller chunks that will be easy for the reader to absorb. 

A Helpful Resource 

Jehn says he relies on a book called  Style: Toward Clarity and Grace  by Joseph Williams, which is a user-friendly writing handbook that is geared to professionals, to guide his efforts. The book can be a valuable resource as you tackle your writing projects and make strategic choices to help you make your work as powerful as possible.

Written by Lisa D. Ellis

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Stanford University School of Medicine blog

How writing helps medical students and doctors handle stress

Poems about the spleen and tales from the operating room are what  Laurel Braitman , PhD, expected to see when she started teaching medical students storytelling five years ago in her role as writer-in-residence for Stanford's  Medicine & the Muse . 

Her students  did  pen pieces about the usual medical maladies; but peppered among the submissions, she saw something else that gave her pause -- candid and raw descriptions of anxiety, imposter syndrome and even thoughts of self-harm.

Understanding the challenges

Researching the stresses faced by health care workers, Braitman learned that the feelings of depression, anxiety and hopelessness that some of her students wrote about weren't ephemeral, atypical, or something they'd "grow out of" once they became doctors. But the more opportunities she gave medical students to tell stories about their frustrations, joys and fears, the better the students reported feeling about themselves and their medical careers, Braitman explains in her new  TED talk .

"I actually never decided to teach writing to students and faculty as a way of processing their emotions and experiences -- it just happened that way," Braitman told me in an email. 

Discovering the benefits

She began teaching for Stanford Medicine & the Muse in 2015, leading storytelling workshops for medical students and for the broader  Stanford medical community . Two years later, Braitman joined Stanford's department of anesthesia as faculty and became Stanford Medicine & the Muse's director of writing and storytelling. In addition to teaching and mentoring, she also co-founded a live storytelling series for medical students called  TalkRx  with medical student Pablo Romano.

One of Braitman's students, Lauren Joseph, wrote about her experience at a Medicine & the Muse storytelling retreat in a Scope story entitled, " I will not be a Robot Doctor ":

Students read pieces about times they failed miserably, times they were hurt, and time they will never get back again. ... As I sat there among all of these blessedly wonderful people, I felt their compassion and humility. They were, like me, struggling against the emotional drains of medicine, and yet they managed to elude the pressures that can harden us into becoming Robot Doctors.

The science behind storytelling

Quantifying how much writing can help medical students isn't easy or an exact science; but Candace Kim, an MD-PhD student at Stanford who works with Braitman, is making progress towards this goal. 

Since 2017, Kim has conducted surveys of medical students who attend Medicine & the Muse writing workshops. She asks students to rank their distress from low ("0") to maximum distress ("7") using the  Mayo Medical Student Well-Being Index , a measure that was co-developed by  Tait Shanafelt , MD, Stanford's chief wellness officer. 

Data from three workshops spanning 2018-19 suggest the workshops were helpful. Kim found that student distress scores decreased by about 43% from before the workshop to one week after it ended. One month after the workshop, students still reported feeling less distress, but the benefit had waned.

"I really think that doctors have the most important job," Braitman said, "and if their lives are at stake, so are ours."

This is especially true today as the coronavirus pandemic poses new and potentially life-threatening challenges for health care workers. 

Combatting the stress of COVID-19

After the COVID-19 outbreak began, Braitman created a new course (available via Zoom and phone), called  Writing Medicine . It's open to health care workers and their loved ones, and requires no writing experience or Stanford affiliation.

In this and other writing courses, students learn to be vulnerable, she said. Many rediscover what drew them to medicine in the first place, by sharing their stories, essays and other creative work.

More than 1,000 doctors, trauma nurses, respiratory therapists and other health care workers and their loved ones have participated in the Writing Medicine course. On Saturday mornings, they come together online to "pause, reflect, be creative and share," Braitman said.

Some members of this "virtual medical family" -- who hail from around the globe -- have already published their work. Others write purely for themselves, as a way to help process their experience. 

Helping health care professionals express and communicate their feelings won't solve the problem of physician burnout, Braitman explained. But, she said, it is essential "in making sure our healers are healthy enough to heal the rest of us."

Images courtesy of Laurel Braitman and Ted Talks.

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