a speech about life is unfair

12 Reasons Why is life so Unfair: Exploring Life’s Injustices

It may seem that some people have to face more difficulties, sufferings, or injustices than others and that they have no control over their circumstances. There are many possible reasons for this, but some of them are: Life is unpredictable and complex, and we cannot foresee or prevent everything that happens to us or around us. Sometimes, random events or factors can have a positive or negative impact on our lives..

Sanju Pradeepa

You’re scrolling through news feeds and see another story of a person who had their life taken away too early. You think to yourself, “What kind of world is this?” It’s a question that many of us have asked at some point in our lives. We live in an unjust world, and it can be hard to process why things are the way they are. But instead of feeling helpless and stuck in this unfairness, you can take control of your own path despite the odds.

It’s no secret that life can feel pretty unfair sometimes. Whether it’s due to a bad break, a missing piece of luck, or simply not getting what you deserve, dealing with life’s injustices can weigh heavily on your heart and mind.

Focusing on the unfairness of it all will do nothing but keep us stuck in a cycle of frustration and bitterness. So, instead of wallowing in the unfairness of life, we should take the time to understand why life is so unfair in the first place.

Let’s take a deep dive into how life works and how you can strive to make a difference by taking charge of your own destiny, even when the deck may sometimes appear stacked against you.

We’ll explore why life is so unfair, bust myths about what’s standing in your way, and ultimately uncover how to create a more just future for generations to come.

Table of Contents

What is ‘unfairness’.

Have you ever felt like life is unfair? It’s a feeling that can happen when things don’t go our way and the world seems to take advantage of us. That’s because life can be unpredictable, chaotic, and sometimes seemingly unjust.

But what exactly is “unfairness,” and why does it happen so often? When we experience an obstacle that we were not expecting or when the outcome of a situation does not match the effort put into it, we are experiencing unfairness.

For example, when you put in a month’s worth of hard work on an assignment only to get a grade of C instead of an A, this may feel unfair.

In reality, there is no universal definition for “unfairness.” Everyone’s perception of justice will be different and shaped by individual experiences.

However, recognizing when something feels unfair can be a useful tool for identifying and understanding our values , including what matters to us, what we think is important in life, and how best to combat the injustice that occurs.

The Nature of The Unfairness of Life

You’ve probably asked yourself at some point: Why is life so unfair? It’s a fair question, one that has been explored by philosophers since the beginning of time. There are many theories as to why life can sometimes feel like an uphill battle, from the idea that it’s all part of a karmic cycle to the notion that life’s hurdles are there to grow us as individuals.

At its core, life’s unfairness can be attributed to two things: chance and our choices. Chance or luck plays a key role in what happens in our lives; it may be as simple as winning a lottery or as complex as our parents’ decision to move away from a war-torn country.

Our choices, on the other hand, determine how we respond to circumstances that come our way. We may choose to give up or carry on, complain about what we don’t have, or find ways to work with the resources we do have.

Understanding these competing forces allows us to accept and embrace life’s challenges with grace and dignity, while also keeping sight of our power in creating positive change.

Perhaps more than anything else, life’s unfairness can lead us to a sense of deep resignation, a feeling that all of our strivings are for naught. We can go our entire lives asking why it has to be this way and never find an answer.

But instead of succumbing to this feeling of helplessness, try to look at life’s unfairness through the lens of humanity. Rather than asking how I cope, consider the strengths, skills, and experiences I’ve gained as a result of my difficult journey. Then apply them to guide and direct your efforts to address inequities in your own community or environment.

No matter what happens, it’s essential to keep believing in a better tomorrow. Accepting that life is unfair does not have to mean accepting defeat; instead, it can serve as motivation for being an advocate for fairness in your own life and community.

Find strength in yourself and your convictions so that you are not resigned but instead inspired to make the world a better place.

Not all Storms Come to Disrupt Your Life But Also to Shape

Common misconceptions about life’s fairness.

Maybe you’ve heard people say that life isn’t fair and it’s often the most difficult circumstances that can serve as a harsh reminder of that phrase. Here are a few common misconceptions about life’s fairness:

1. Life is supposed to be easy.

It isn’t always supposed to be easy. In fact, we learn lessons and gain strength through struggle. Life is meant to challenge us, stretch us, and make us grow. This doesn’t mean it’s always easy or that things won’t seem unfair at times, but if we persevere through the storms with resilience, we will grow stronger and more capable of tackling even bigger challenges in the future.

2. It matters who you know .

At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter who you know or who your parents are. It’s all about how hard you work. You don’t need to be related to someone influential or depended on luck; it comes down to putting in the hours and not giving up when things get tough.

3. Only Money buys happiness .

This couldn’t be further from the truth: money can never buy true joy or unconditional love in your life. We should appreciate what we have instead of striving for something more materialistic. True happiness comes from within and experiencing new things, not from having more stuff around us.

Reasons Why Money Can’t Buy Happiness: 12 possible Reasons

Reasons why is life so unfair.

Life can be unfair due to chance and our choices. Chance or luck plays a key role in what happens in our lives, while our choices can also lead to unfairness. For example, we may choose to associate with people who are not good for us, or we may make poor decisions that lead to negative consequences. It’s important to recognize that life is not always fair and to focus on what we can control .

We all feel like life is unfair sometimes. We all deserve a fair break in this world, but the truth is, it doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes it seems unfair because you happen to have been born with fewer advantages than someone else, and it seems unfair that people judge your success as your own doing and their failure as a result of their own shortcomings.

But what’s important to remember is that these feelings of unfairness don’t need to strongly affect your life or make you feel worse. It’s easy to let them consume us, but we must be able to take a step back from how we think and be objective about the situation so that we don’t allow our emotions to take control of what we do.

1. Life Is Unpredictable and Uncontrollable

At times, it can feel like life is entirely out of your control. We do our best to plan, prepare, and make decisions but sometimes, it seems like the universe has something else planned for us. Life is unpredictable and uncontrollable, and that feeling of powerlessness can often lead to feelings of unfairness.

Put simply: you never know what challenges or obstacles life is going to throw your way. A lot of the time, these will be beyond your control which makes it hard to find solutions that will make life fairer in the future.

You may find yourself imagining different circumstances that would have allowed you to have a more successful outcome, but you’ll never be able to predict exactly what challenges will arise in your future. The unpredictable nature of life often makes things feel unfair, as if success isn’t down to our own hard work and perseverance.

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2. unequal life opportunities.

Life can seem especially unfair when you consider the unequal opportunities available between social classes and those in different locations. No matter how hard you work, if you don’t have the same opportunities as others, chances are that you won’t be successful.

The way you’ve been educated plays a major role in what kind of future awaits you. For example, if you come from a poorer background and don’t get the same quality of education as those from higher socioeconomic classes, your career options are automatically limited. You might not even get access to certain job openings or competitive courses due to your lack of access to proper education.

Geographic Location

Though the internet has made our world smaller, where you physically live in it still matters. Living in certain areas can determine what kind of job opportunities are available to you, or how much money you can make doing certain jobs.

Depending on where you live, there might be a lower supply and higher demand for certain jobs meaning less competition for people looking for work but that may also mean lower wages than elsewhere.

Though life can seem unfair at times, it’s important to remember that everyone has different life experiences, privileges, and obstacles they have overcome along the way, and these factors all play into what we have achieved in our lives so far. There is no right or wrong way to reach success, just hard work and perseverance.

Why is Life so Hard for Some and not Others: 10 Injustices

3. our own mindsets can manifest injustice.

It’s all too easy to spend our days feeling helpless and angry in the face of injustice. But while external forces can often be out of our control, one thing we can control is our own mindset and attitude . The way you view the world can affect how you experience it, and that means that your own mindset can be a tool for justice or for destructive behavior.

This is because our mindsets shape the stories that we tell ourselves about why certain situations are the way that they are, whether through a lens of injustice or justice.

You have the power to start shaping these stories to fit a more just perspective within your own mind by investing time in self-reflection and learning how to become aware of your own negative biases , understand the history of various forms of oppression, and explore your privilege when engaging with others. In doing this, you can create space to build solidarity with those who experience injustice instead of perpetuating it.

4. We Have Limited Control Over Our Destiny

At the end of the day, much of what happens to us in life is out of our control. You may have had ambitions and dreams for yourself and your future, but there are always external factors that can have a significant impact on how things turn out.

For instance, perhaps you applied for your dream job, hoping for success. But unbeknownst to you, the company was only offering the role internally, and so you didn’t even stand a chance from the start.

Or maybe you wanted to major in engineering at college but ended up having to take out student loans and couldn’t afford them. In both cases, it’s far from fair or reasonable that you couldn’t fulfill your plans, but these things simply can’t be helped in some cases.

It is important to remember that life isn’t necessarily designed to be “fair” or easy all the time, no matter how much we wish it were. Just because we are faced with obstacles doesn’t mean hope is lost. Understanding why life isn’t fair can help us find our way forward when faced with hardships.

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5. we are victims of our own circumstances.

Sometimes, life feels unfair because we are victims of our circumstances. When the cards are dealt, it may seem like some people have been dealt better hands than others. It’s true some people may be born into wealth and privilege, while others may come from poverty and inequality. But that doesn’t mean you’re stuck in your circumstances forever.

You can make the best of what you have, no matter where you come from or what resources you have to draw upon. Here is a list of ways in which you can create a brighter future for yourself regardless of your current situation:

• Develop strong relationships with those around you.
• Take the initiative to improve your skillset.
• Make use of any resources available to you
• Embrace challenges as learning opportunities.
• Set short-term and long-term goals.
• Find mentors who can guide and advise you.
• Surround yourself with positive, like-minded people.
• Take time to think, plan and reflect on your progress.
• Persevere through adversity, and never give up hope.

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6. society’s definition of success can be unfair.

It can feel like life is unfair when trying to determine what is considered ‘successful’ in society. We’re all so different and each of us is unique in our own way yet the same old rules seem to apply no matter what.

When it comes to measuring success, society tends to focus on traditional markers like education, financial status, job titles, and material possessions. And while these are important, they don’t always reflect the achievements you’re proudest of or the true value of your unique set of skills.

That’s not fair. Your definition of success should be personal; it’s how you define accomplishment on your own terms. Don’t let someone else decide what success looks like for you because everybody’s path looks different, and everyone takes a different route before reaching the version of success that works for them.

It can be hard to stick up for yourself sometimes and believe in yourself. But remind yourself that the world has no idea what you’re capable of until you show them. Ultimately, it’s up to you to craft your goals and work toward a purpose that makes sense for you, not anyone else.

7. Unfair Expectations Based on Gender and Race

Have you ever felt like you’re being judged or even held to different standards, simply because of your gender or race? It’s no secret that society still hasn’t completely transcended traditional ideas about gender and race, and sometimes this leads to unfair expectations from friends, family, school, the workplace, and more.

Here are some examples of how these expectations can be unfair:

Family Pressure

When it comes to family, it’s common for certain expectations to be placed on particular genders or racial identities. For example, a single mother might put a lot more pressure on her son to succeed than her daughter, in order to “make up” for the absence of a male role model in the home.

Appearance Standards

There is also a lot of pressure placed on people to subscribe and conform to societal beauty standards from hair length, skin tone and clothing choice which can be based on gender or race. This is especially true in the media and fashion industries.

Implications in Employment Opportunities

Race-based discrimination can still exist within hiring practices at workplaces from job interviews right through to promotions where certain stereotypes about specific ethnic minorities may cause them to be overlooked for roles that they are qualified for but that someone else may be deemed more suitable for.

It’s not easy living with fair expectations that feel unfair but being aware of the problem is an important first step towards creating change.

I used to struggle with my mind for a long time, wondering why this happened to me even though I did my best. After a long period of sitting in a corner, thinking about the unfairness of life and why I deserved it when I hadn’t done anything wrong, here are some ways I’ve learned to cope with the majority of my unfair situations:

8. Life isn’t supposed to be fair or equal for everyone.

Life isn’t supposed to be fair or equal for everyone. Some people are born into wealth and privilege, while others face immense hardships from day one. As much as we wish it weren’t so, the truth is that life’s injustices are unavoidable.

We all have moments when the unfairness of it all hits us hard. Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do jerks seem to have all the luck? It can feel profoundly unjust.

The hard truth is that there’s no grand plan ensuring that good deeds are rewarded or that hard work always pays off. Life is simply neither fair nor unfair. While we can work to remedy injustice and inequality on a societal scale, on an individual level, the only thing we can control is our reaction. When life’s inequities threaten to get you down:

• Practice self-care. Make sure to connect with loved ones who support you.
• Focus on gratitude. Appreciate the good things you do have, rather than resenting what you lack.
• Do small acts of kindness. Helping others gets your mind off your worries and boosts your well-being.

Accept what you can’t change. As hard as it is, make peace with the fact that life isn’t meant to be fair. The only thing you can control is your response.

Though the world may not always be just, we can find meaning even in suffering. We can choose compassion over bitterness and kindness over resentment. Life may not be fair, but we can still make the world a little bit better. That is within our power.

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9. the role of luck and randomness in outcomes.

We all know life isn’t fair. As much as we’d like to believe that hard work and perseverance always pay off, the truth is that luck and randomness play a huge role in how things turn out.

Take getting into college, for example. No matter how good your grades are or how high you score on the SAT, there’s an element of chance regarding who gets accepted and who gets rejected. Admissions officers have to make judgment calls, and they don’t always get it right. Sometimes less deserving students get in while more deserving ones don’t. It’s not fair, but it’s life.

The same is true in careers and business. Two equally smart, hardworking entrepreneurs could start companies at the same time but end up with vastly different outcomes based primarily on luck. One might happen to launch a product that taps into the cultural zeitgeist and spreads like wildfire, while the other’s offering fails to gain traction through no fault of their own.

Romantic relationships are also subject to a fair amount of randomness. Meeting the right person often comes down to fortunate timing and stumbling into a serendipitous encounter. While there are things we can do to increase the probability of finding a good match, ultimately finding “the one” requires a bit of luck.

The truth is, life’s not fair because randomness and luck are built into the system. The universe is chaotic, complex, and unpredictable. While there are always things we can do to tilt the odds in our favor, at the end of the day, the amount of control we have over outcomes is limited. The sooner we accept this, the less disappointed we’ll be when life feels unfair. The good news is that, while randomness may work against us at times, it can also work in our favor. So, here’s to hoping Lady Luck is on your side!

Is Success Luck or Hard Work: Unpacking the Success Equation

10. cognitive biases lead us to see injustice where it may not exist..

We all have a tendency to perceive injustice and unfairness in the world around us, even when they do not exist. Our cognitive biases—the mental shortcuts our brains take to make quick judgments—often lead us to see unfairness where there is none.

Confirmation bias

We seek out and believe information that confirms what we already think and ignore information that contradicts our preexisting beliefs. So if we expect the world to be unfair, we’ll notice and focus on examples that prove that belief while dismissing instances that suggest otherwise.

Illusory correlation

We tend to perceive a relationship between two events when there is none. For example, we may think people of a certain ethnicity get promoted more often because of their character flaws, when in reality there is no connection. Our mind is creating an illusory correlation.

Fundamental attribution error

We blame individuals for their circumstances rather than considering external factors. When we see someone in an unfortunate situation, we assume it’s due to their own poor choices or character flaws. We fail to account for factors outside of their control, like their environment, upbringing, education, and opportunities (or lack thereof). This bias leads us to believe that life’s injustices are deserved or self-inflicted, rather than a result of an unfair system or random chance.

We judge people for things outside of their control, like natural talents, family wealth, health issues, or other life circumstances. But no one chooses the conditions into which they are born or the random events that shape their lives. Recognizing this “moral luck” can help us develop more empathy and see that perceived injustices are often due to arbitrary factors, not life.

The truth is, life isn’t always fair. But by being aware of our cognitive biases, we can gain a more balanced perspective and work to build a society with greater justice and equality of opportunity. Recognizing moral luck and arbitrary chance can help foster more empathy, compassion, and kindness toward others.

Cognitive Bias: 9 Invisible Forces That Shape Our Decisions

11. early childhood experiences shape our sense of fairness..

Our sense of fairness is shaped from an early age. As children, we observe the world around us and internalize beliefs about justice and equality based on how we see others treated. Unfortunately, the lessons we learn aren’t always good ones.

Many of us grew up in environments where we witnessed inequality, prejudice, and mistreatment. We saw people denied opportunities or judged harshly due to their gender, race, orientation, religion, or social class. These early experiences taught us that the world isn’t fair and planted the seeds of cynicism.

The messages we received

As kids, well-meaning adults often tell us “life isn’t fair” to prepare us for disappointment. But hearing this repeatedly can lead us to accept unfairness and even spread it to others. We may adopt beliefs like:

• People get what they deserve.
• Might makes right. It’s a dog-eat-dog world.

These toxic messages stay with us and skew our views. Even small injustices in childhood, like perceived favoritism shown to another child, can have a lasting impact.

The scars remain.

The unfairness we observe as children leaves scars on our sense of justice that are hard to heal. As adults, we see the world through this lens of cynicism and expect the worst. When we encounter new injustices, no matter how small, old wounds are ripped open. Our reaction is disproportionate to the current situation because it taps into a well of accumulated pain.

The only way to improve our sense of fairness is through conscious effort. We must challenge old beliefs, increase our empathy, and commit to building a more just world for others. It’s a long process, but by healing ourselves, we can help make society a little fairer too.

12. Some groups face systemic injustices and discrimination.

Some groups in society face systemic discrimination and injustice. Minority groups, marginalized communities, and vulnerable populations often struggle against unfair treatment, a lack of opportunity, and unequal access to resources.

As a society, we have come a long way toward promoting equality and justice for all. But we still have a long way to go to remedy the harms of discrimination and make sure everyone has a fair chance in life, regardless of their race, gender, internal orientation, disability status, or other attributes.

Racial minorities

Racial discrimination and racial injustice are still major problems. Minority groups face higher rates of poverty, unemployment, police violence, and incarceration. They have less access to healthcare, education, and economic opportunity. Systemic racism built into our institutions and policies continues to negatively impact people of color.

Women face discrimination and unequal treatment in the workplace, like unequal pay and a lack of career advancement opportunities compared to men. They experience high rates of domestic violence. In some cultures, women have little access to education, healthcare, and control over family planning. Legal rights and protections for women are still lacking in many parts of the world.

LGBTQ+ community

The LGBTQ+ community faces discrimination, stigma, and a lack of legal rights in many places. They experience high rates of harassment, violence, homelessness, and mental health issues. Same-gender marriage and adoption rights are still not recognized universally. Many face rejection from friends and family due to their internal orientation or gender identity.

People with disabilities

Those with physical, intellectual, and mental disabilities often face discrimination, lack of accommodation, and unequal access to public spaces, transportation, healthcare, education, and employment. Many live in poverty due to a lack of opportunity and difficulty finding gainful work. Legal protections against discrimination are not strongly enforced.

We all must work to remedy injustice, promote equal treatment under the law, and create a fair and just society for people from all walks of life. No one should face unfair barriers due to attributes outside of their control. Together, we can build a more equitable and inclusive world for all.

How do you cope with the unfairness of life?

It doesn’t seem fair that some people get to experience privilege and affluence and others don’t, does it? You may feel powerless to make a change in the world, but your life is still within your control. Here’s how you can start taking ownership of your own path:

1. Recognize and Accept Unfairness

No one likes to think about it, but unfairness is an unavoidable truth in life. No matter how hard you try or how much you think you deserve something, unfair things happen. Recognizing and accepting this can be difficult, but it’s key to gaining the strength to keep going when times are tough.

So, how do you recognize and accept the unfairness of life? Start by understanding that life is not fair for everyone not for you , and not for anybody else either. Treating yourself with compassion during hard times will help to remind you that everyone experiences their share of misfortune from time to time.

Often, unfairness can be seen as a test of emotional resilience ; it’s a reminder to stay strong and not give up in the face of struggle or disappointment. It also helps to look at how far you’ve come : learn from your past experiences so that they don’t become roadblocks as you move forward in your journey.

By acknowledging the nature of life’s inherent unfairness and recognizing its purpose, you can find inner strength when faced with an unjust reality.

2. Learn to Cultivate Gratitude and Perspective.

It may seem like life is simply unfair to you right now, but the feeling of helplessness is only natural. The best thing to do is to stop worrying so much and focus your energy on cultivating gratitude and perspective in your life.

When things don’t go your way, take a moment to look around and appreciate the good things in your life. Making a list of all the people, places, and moments that have brought you joy can be a powerful tool for reflection and refocusing on what makes life worth living.

It’s also a great reminder that even when times feel hard, they could always be worse. So, take advantage of these moments to practice gratitude and kindness.

Perspective

Life has its ups and downs, but if you take the time to look back over the course of your life, is it really that different than it was before? As you evaluate difficult situations, remember that it’s not just about what happened today, yesterday, or last week. It’s also about how you got here.

How did this decision lead up to this moment? You can learn so much by trying to understand how events unfolded in order to help make better decisions down the line.

Learning how to cultivate gratitude and perspective are two invaluable tools for dealing with unfair times in life. Not only will they help you move past unfortunate events more easily, but they will also serve as reminders of the more beautiful aspects of life as well as give you an opportunity for growth through reflection and insight.

3. Become more aware of your thoughts and feelings

There are many ways to cope with the unfairness of life. The first step is awareness, so you can start making changes in your life. When we’re stressed, it can be difficult for us to see that we’re feeling upset or angry about something. We need to know how we feel so that we can acknowledge what’s troubling us and take steps toward changing it, if necessary.

Life is what you make of it. The world, as we know it, is a reflection of our thoughts and feelings, our desires and fears . To this day, the majority of people believe that life has been unfair to them and that they were born into unjust circumstances.

I would like to challenge this assumption by explaining how you can change your response to what happens in your life, instead of waiting for life to give back all its natural blessings without asking for anything in return.

If you want something bad enough, then nothing will stop you from getting it, even if there are obstacles standing in your way.

We are all born with different abilities and talents, some with a silver spoon in their mouths and others with a golden one. Some people have to work hard for what they want, while others do not.

Some may have been lucky enough to be born into wealthy families who can afford to give them everything they need, but this doesn’t mean that you won’t have struggles of your own if you don’t get what everyone else gets on your birth certificate.

It’s easy to think that life isn’t fair because we’ve all experienced hardships or problems at some point in our lives, but remember: This doesn’t mean there isn’t hope for change.

You Can’t Change What Happens to You

When your best friend moves away, gets fired, or breaks up with their boyfriend or girlfriend and leaves town for good when these things happen, they’re just the way they are.

You can’t do anything about them other than respond appropriately in response to them and then go on with life as if nothing happened. They are part of who we are as humans; our lives are made up of who we have been and what has happened to us throughout our lives (both positive and negative).

You won’t change this fact about yourself by changing your circumstances; there isn’t any magic wand that will allow you access to another dimension where everything goes according to plan for everyone who lives there.

You Can Change Your Response

We all have a choice when we’re faced with situations like this. We can choose to be happy or sad.

If you feel sad, think about what you can change about your response:

• Change your perspective . Think about how the situation makes sense from an outside perspective, rather than from the perspective of someone who has been through it before and knows what’s coming next (e.g., “This is just one more thing out of our hands.”)
• Focus on what matters most in life instead of focusing on things that don’t matter at all (like dwelling in the past).

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4. learn to focus on what makes you happy, instead of what doesn’t..

“Focus on what makes you happy, and do what gives meaning to your life”   Barry Schwartz,  The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less

It’s easy to focus on the negative and dwell on everything that’s going wrong. But if you’re trying to find happiness, it’s important to look at the positive things in life as well.

When I was younger, I was always too preoccupied with what I didn’t have instead of focusing on all the things that I could control, which usually led me right back down into a pit of depression.

But now that I’ve learned how valuable it is for me (and others) to take time out each day just thinking about those things that make us smile or laugh out loud.

5. Be kind and be grateful for what you have

The world is full of people who have it worse than you do, so it’s easy to take things for granted and feel like your life is unfair. But if you’re always thankful for all the good things in your life, then this will help remind you that there are some people out there who have even less than what they deserve.

If you can’t do this, then try to see the positive side of things, or at least try not to focus on all the bad things that happen in life and only think about how lucky we are if we get through them alive, or just be able to wake up tomorrow morning without being paralyzed by fear from what could happen next time around.

Take time out for yourself : If there isn’t anything else going on during the day (and this includes family members),

*Try taking a break from work or school by spending an hour doing something relaxing, such as reading a book or listening to music .

* Talk about it: Talking about how you feel with someone who cares about you will help relieve some stressors in your life.

*Engage in a hobby or practice mindfulness.

* Get enough sleep at night before going to work each morning so that when daylight comes around again after midnight then there won’t be any need whatsoever.”

* Be kinder towards yourself by recognizing your strengths and weaknesses, rather than focusing on all the things that could go wrong if something bad happened (like losing an important job). It may sound silly, but sometimes asking someone else how they would handle an issue can help us get over ourselves enough so we can move forward with confidence instead of being stuck in fear mode all day long.

6. Find the Strength to Move Forward

It’s okay to feel sad, angry and frustrated when life feels unfair. After all, what other emotions should you be feeling in these trying times? It’s natural to have a range of emotions just don’t let them consume you.

What do you do when life doesn’t go the way you expected? How do you find the strength to move forward even though it feels like your world has been shattered?

1. Acknowledge Your Emotions

It’s important to acknowledge and accept that life is unfair sometimes. We can try our best to control what happens around us, but at the end of the day, we’re not always in control. Accepting that will help ease your mind and free up inner strength for moving on.

2. Surround Yourself with Support

Having a strong support system help you process your emotions and provide comfort during difficult times. Being surrounded by family or friends who understand your situation can be incredibly beneficial in helping you cope with an injustice or unfairness that’s beyond your control.

3. Believe in Something Bigger

If you believe in something bigger than yourself, like a spiritual practice, religion, or force of nature, finding strength during tough times can be easier knowing that everything happens for a reason. Whether it’s fate, destiny, or luck, believing something greater is controlling your world can make unfairness seem more manageable.

4. Look for role models.

Find people who have faced or are facing similar struggles and see how they tackled them. Their stories of resilience might just be what helps you take control of your own path and find hope in an unjust world.

5. Practice self-care and self-compassion.

Take time to nurture yourself and practice self-love so that you can be in a better state of mind to tackle any obstacles that come your way.

6. Know that it isn’t your fault.

You may feel like you’ve been dealt a bad hand in life, but don’t blame yourself a lot of the time, we simply don’t have control over our circumstances.

7. Find Your Power.

In order to take control of your own path, you first need to find your power. This power can come from within, through self-esteem and self-confidence , or it can be found in those around you—family, friends, and other support systems. Once you have identified your source of power, use it to guide you towards the knowledge and skills that will help you flourish in challenging times.

What Determines Self-Worth: 9 Factors (Not to Focus on)

8. find the meaning and purpose in your life.

It’s natural to feel like everything is outside of your control when life throws challenges your way. But believe it or not, you can still take back some level of control. Start by asking yourself what meaning and purpose you want your life to have.

Think of this exercise like mapping a path, but instead of a physical one, it’s a mental pathway, leading towards the goals and purpose you want to find in life. It’s up to you and only you to establish what it is you want out of life and take the steps necessary to make it happen.

What kind of legacy do you want to leave behind? What causes do you stand for? These are just some of the questions that will help define your life’s purpose. Consider who has inspired you throughout your journey and how their story has shaped or motivated yours . Who are the people or things that bring positivity into your life?

After identifying goals for yourself, create action plans for turning them into reality. Consider what resources are at your disposal. Think about the skills that come naturally to you and how they can help bring those ideas from conception to implementation.

Life can be harsh, unpredictable, and sometimes downright cruel at times, but it doesn’t have to end there. By taking the time to focus on what truly matters in life and what drives us forward in our lives, we can start reclaiming some control and establishing a higher level of contentment.

Finding Purpose and Meaning in Life Despite Its Unfairness

Life is not always fair, but this doesn’t mean that it is devoid of any purpose or meaning. As hard as it may seem, finding purpose and meaning in life despite its unfairness is a key step to understanding and accepting the unfairness of life.

Firstly, it’s important to remember that life is about perspective. Everyone experiences different things in life, so the way you view life’s unfairness will depend on your own unique experience. You can find ways to make sense of the situations that feel unfair by taking a step back and reframing them in terms of what you can learn from them and where they may be leading you.

Secondly, it is essential to focus on what makes life meaningful to you finding things that give you joy and bring out the best in yourself will help provide perspective during tough times. This could involve getting involved in something that helps society, developing your creativity or engaging with your community.

Finally, it is important to remember that there are some things in life we cannot control; however, challenging yourself to change what you do have control over will help you find strength during times when things seem unfair. This could involve taking an active role in seeking out helpful insights or changing your expectations or beliefs about yourself and the world around you.

How to Determine Your Values:  A Guide to Find What Matters

How to find balance between accepting fate and taking control of our lives.

Fate is the idea that our future is fixed, predetermined, or preordained by some outside influence. It’s the belief that some higher power has arranged everything for us and our actions don’t really make a difference. On the other hand, taking control implies that you are in charge of your destiny and have the power to make decisions to shape your own future.

At first glance, it may seem like accepting fate and taking control of our lives are opposites. After all, one involves trusting that whatever happens is meant to be, while the other requires us to take on the responsibility of creating our own destiny.

But the truth is that they are deeply connected. When we accept the things we have no control over the events, people, and situations in our lives that can’t be changed we actually create space in our minds and hearts to focus more on the things we can control. Instead of worrying about something outside of our power, we can shift our energy towards productive goals and actions.

Once we understand this connection, it becomes much easier to find a balance between these two forces in life: accepting what’s out of our hands and taking action on what’s within it. Knowing when to embrace fate and when to take charge will lead us closer to achieving a fulfilling life.

It can be hard to find the balance between accepting fate and taking control of our lives, but it doesn’t have to be impossible. Here are a few tips for how you can do it:

1. Living Purposefully

It involves doing the things that matter most to us and focusing on our goals and dreams. Making conscious decisions about our lives, instead of simply allowing life to control us, is a way to take control of our own destiny.

For example, if you want to become a doctor, create a plan that outlines how you will make that happen what courses do you need to take? What will your timeline look like? How will you pay for your education? These are just some examples of how you can start taking control of your life while still accepting that there may be bumps in the road along the way.

2. Embracing Uncertainty

Accepting our fate means embracing uncertainty with an open mind and heart. This can be difficult, especially because uncertainty often carries shame and guilt. Instead of trying to close off from these feelings, try to sit with them and work through them so that you can move forward in a healthy way.

3. Letting Go of Expectations

It is key when it comes to finding balance between accepting fate and taking control of our own lives . We all have certain hopes or expectations when it comes to where we want to go in life. The difference is in how we approach those expectations. If we’re too rigid in our expectations, it might mean that we don’t leave room for unexpected surprises along the way or opportunities for growth and learning.

4. Take Action

At the same time, it’s important to take action and make decisions that are in your best interest. There will always be things that are out of our control, but we can still make choices that will lead us in the right direction. Whether it’s taking on a new job, starting a business, going back to school or investing in yourself, taking proactive steps towards your goals makes you more in control of your own destiny and gives you hope for the future.

5. Celebrate Small Wins

When life isn’t going your way, focus on small wins as a reminder that progress is possible even when the odds seem stacked against you. Celebrating small wins builds resilience. It is something we need to get through challenging times and boosts our sense of self-efficacy (our belief in ourselves). It also helps keep our focus on what matters most: staying resilient despite life’s injustices and having faith that good things will happen eventually.

Who Said Life Had to Be Always Fair?

If you have ever opened up the newspaper or your Facebook feed, you know this to be true. The world is full of people who are suffering in one way or another. People suffer from a disease, poverty, oppression, or the way they were born (even the appearance and more about themselves).

Life is a bit unfair. And you’re not the only one who feels this way. There are many people out there who are also living their lives in a world that seems unfair, but what can we do about it? Firstly , know that your situation is unique to you and no one else. It may seem like everyone else has it worse than you, but they don’t; they just have different circumstances that affect them differently from yours.

Second of all : although some things will be harder for you than others (and those things will probably happen sooner or later), there’s always hope for change. Things always get better as time goes on, if it doesn’t sound like it right now.

Maybe it won’t be so bad tomorrow… or next year… or even ten years from now, when we’re all old ladies sitting in our rocking chairs, reminiscing about how much fun we used to have together when life was simpler.

So, it is better to wake up our mind to see the truth/ the reality of the life .

Sometimes you are the one who has more advantages than someone else, and it seems unfair that people judge your success as your own doing and their failure as a result of their own shortcomings.

We all have different circumstances. Some people are born into more fortunate situations than others, and some are in less fortunate situations, but we all have to deal with what we’re dealt with in life. We don’t make our own luck or misfortune; it’s just part of being human.

Remember not only you, many people struggle with the question of why life is so unfair. They may feel that they have been dealt a bad hand, that they face more challenges than others, or that they are victims of fate or circumstance. But is life really unfair, or is it just our perception of it?

One way to approach this question is to consider the concept of fairness itself. What does it mean for something to be fair? How do we measure fairness? Who decides what is fair and what is not? These are not easy questions to answer, and different people may have different opinions and values. Another way to approach this question is to recognize that life is not a single entity but a complex and dynamic system of interconnected events, choices, and consequences.

Life is not something that happens to us, but something that we participate in and influence. We cannot control everything that happens in life, but we can control how we respond to it. We can choose to see life as a series of opportunities and challenges rather than as a series of obstacles and injustices.

Life is not fair or unfair; it is what we make of it. We can choose to focus on the positive aspects of life, such as our strengths, our passions, our relationships, and our goals. We can also choose to learn from the negative aspects of life, such as our mistakes, our failures, our setbacks, and our losses. We can use these experiences as sources of growth, resilience, and wisdom.

Life is not a competition or a comparison; it is a journey and a discovery. We can choose to appreciate the diversity and uniqueness of life rather than judge or envy others. We can also choose to celebrate our own achievements and contributions, rather than diminish or undermine them. We can use these moments as sources of joy, gratitude, and fulfillment.

We must live with the fact that life will not always be fair, no matter how hard we try. There are many people out there who have it worse than you do. This is just a fact of life that we must accept as we grow older and face the challenges and struggles of adulthood.

Life is not always as fair as you’d expect. You can’t change that. But you can change how you respond to it. Sometimes things indeed happen in life that make you wonder, “Why is life so unfair to me?” or feel angry, sad, or frustrated. But if we learn to focus on what makes us happy instead of what doesn’t, then those experiences become opportunities for growth instead of obstacles to it.

If you’re feeling down about life being unfair, don’t focus on the negatives. Instead, focus on what makes you happy and positive, and let those feelings carry you through your day. You may not be able to change what happens around us, but we can sure as heck change our own reactions towards them, and that will help us feel better in any situation.

It’s easy to get caught up in the feeling that life is unfair, but it’s important to remember that you have the power to create your own path. Some of the most essential steps are learning how to take control, identifying the views and beliefs that you want to live by, and taking the time to develop practices that will help you self-regulate your emotions and create positive change .

• Life is NOT FAIR. It NEVER Will Be. It’s OK. – YouTube video
• 7 reasons why life isn’t fair and how to be better at accepting it.
• ABOUT NEW YORK; Life Is Unfair, but Not Always Tragic – New York Times Magazine
• The Paradox of Choice – Book by Barry Schwartz

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2 thoughts on “12 Reasons Why is life so Unfair: Exploring Life’s Injustices”

Most of what you write is wrong. Life is unfair. That’s the first one. Although when taken as a simplification, you can let that one pass. As I don’t want to write a long clarification, I’ll keep it very concise by only writing the broad concept. Life is what happens and that can never be fair or unfair. It happens. Only when you define life as concept as the results of people’s actions, then certainly and without a doubt, life is unfair. Because people are incredibly unfair. And they are because it benefits themselves. When a situation presents itself where someone will benefit from being fair, then they will be fair. Will you then say that life is fair? Of course not. Life is perceived as unfair because the overwhelming majority of human interaction is so that someone will benefit by treating another person unfairly. It is rare that one will benefit by treating others fairly. So, no, life is not unfair or fair for that matter, it’s just life. It happens. It’s people who are overwhelmingly unfair ( and it’s not 60-40 or even 80-20, its 99,9-0.1) .

“Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I appreciate your perspective on life and fairness. While it’s true that life can be unpredictable and people can be unfair, I believe that we can still strive to make the world a better place by treating others with kindness and respect. It’s important to remember that our actions have consequences and can impact others in ways we may not realize. That’s how our lives become unfair.

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Life Is Not Fair and It Never Will Be. It’s OK (Motivational Speech)

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Speaker: Tyrone Stokes

Transcript – Life Is Not Fair and It Never Will Be. It’s OK (Motivational Speech)

I’ve never heard a sane person say life is fair.
 It’s not fair.
 It never has been, it wasn’t designed to be and it never will be.

But it can, and should be viewed as a blessing.
 It can, and should be viewed as a wonderful adventure that we only get for a brief moment, so we must make the most of it while we are here.

Things will break, It’s OK. Things will fall apart, It’s OK. Your plans won’t work out… It’s OK.

Blessings will turn into challenges and you’ll never know the difference… It’s OK.

It won’t be fair. Ever. It’s OK.

Nothing will be handed to you, It’s OK.

People will do you wrong… Even some you trust… It’s OK.

You’ll let yourself down… It’s OK.

You’ll lose people you love… It’s OK.

You will fail, You will lose, It’s OK.

It’s ok because you’ll have perspective. It’s ok because you’ll live with gratitude. You’ll live with integrity.

When you fail… you’ll learn When you lose… you’ll be gracious and more determined to win next time.

When you lose someone you’ll remember that you really won. You won the time you had with them, the blessing of them in your life.

It’s OK. 
It is more than ok.

Life is whatever you make it.

Make it great.

Essay on Life Unfairness

Students are often asked to write an essay on Life Unfairness in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Life Unfairness

Introduction.

Life is a journey, filled with ups and downs. We often hear the phrase “life is unfair,” but what does it truly mean? Simply put, it means that life doesn’t always treat everyone the same way. Some people face more challenges than others, which can seem unfair.

Understanding Unfairness

Unfairness in life can be seen in many forms. Some people are born with more privileges than others. These can include wealth, health, or opportunities. Some people have to work harder to get the same things that others get easily, which is unfair.

Effects of Unfairness

Life unfairness can lead to feelings of sadness, anger, and frustration. It can make people feel like they are not good enough or that they don’t deserve good things. This can harm a person’s self-esteem and make it hard for them to be happy.

Overcoming Unfairness

Even though life can be unfair, it’s important to remember that everyone has the power to overcome challenges. By working hard, staying positive, and never giving up, we can make the most of the hand we are dealt. Life is what we make of it, after all.

In conclusion, life unfairness is a reality that we all have to deal with. It can be tough, but it’s also a chance for us to grow stronger. Remember, it’s not about what life gives you, but what you do with what you’re given.

250 Words Essay on Life Unfairness

Understanding life unfairness.

Life can sometimes seem unfair. This means that things do not always happen the way we want or expect. Some people may have more luck, money, or opportunities than others. This is what we call ‘life unfairness’.

Examples of Life Unfairness

One example of life unfairness is the difference between rich and poor people. Some people are born in rich families while others are born in poor families. This is not because of anything they did, but just by chance. This can affect the opportunities they get in life, like the kind of school they go to or the jobs they can get.

Dealing with Life Unfairness

Even though life can be unfair, it is important to remember that we can still do our best with what we have. We can work hard, be kind to others, and keep a positive attitude. We might not be able to change everything, but we can control how we respond to it.

Learning from Life Unfairness

Life unfairness can also be a chance to learn and grow. It can teach us to be understanding and compassionate. When we see others who are less fortunate, we can help them if we can. This can make us better people and make the world a better place.

In conclusion, life unfairness is a part of life that we all have to deal with. It can be hard, but it can also be a chance to learn and grow. We should remember to do our best with what we have and to help others when we can.

500 Words Essay on Life Unfairness

Introduction to life unfairness.

Life is a journey filled with many ups and downs. At times, it may seem like life is unfair. When we say “life is unfair”, we mean that things do not always go as planned or as we wish. Sometimes, we face problems that seem too big to handle. Other times, we see people who seem to have it all while we struggle. This is what we call ‘Life Unfairness’.

There are many examples of unfairness in life. Some people are born into rich families while others are born poor. Some people are healthy while others have to deal with sickness from a young age. Some are born with talents that others can only dream of. These are all examples of life’s unfairness. It’s not about who worked harder or who deserves more, it’s just the way things are.

Handling Life Unfairness

Even though life can be unfair, it doesn’t mean we should give up. Yes, life can be tough and it can seem like the odds are against us. But it’s important to remember that we all have the power to change our circumstances. We can work hard, be kind, and strive to make the best of what we have. We can’t control what life throws at us, but we can control how we react to it.

Learning from Unfairness

Life’s unfairness can teach us many things. It can make us stronger, more understanding, and more compassionate. Seeing unfairness can motivate us to help others and to fight for justice. It can also teach us to appreciate what we have and not to take things for granted.

In conclusion, life can indeed be unfair. But remember, it’s not about what happens to us, but how we react to it. We can let life’s unfairness bring us down, or we can use it as a tool to grow and become better people. Life’s unfairness is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to define us. We can choose to rise above it and make the best of what we have. Remember, every cloud has a silver lining, and even in the most unfair situations, there is always something good to be found.

In the end, life’s unfairness is a part of the journey. It’s a part of what makes us who we are. So, while life may be unfair, it’s also full of opportunities for growth and learning. And that’s something to be thankful for.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

• Essay on Life Struggles
• Essay on Life Plan
• Essay on Life Origin Theories

Apart from these, you can look at all the essays by clicking here .

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Speech About Life Is Unfair

Don’t you just miss those times as a child when we use to ask for something and get it straight away? The world was controlled by our fingertips. Well, that’s what we believed in. But just that feeling of taking control was amazing. Right? Now it’s the complete opposite. We have to bend on our knees to get something- even that don’t work. Reality is unfair. Isn’t it? Although, when we got what we want, we would cherish it for the rest of our lives, like a child swimming in sweets and chocolates.

That is when we see life in a different prospectus

Essay Example on Life Sometimes Can Be Unfair

Our society is changing day by day, and making us forget the word ‘respect’ which nowadays no one is able to find in their dictionary. When I walk outside, the people who use to say hi are now acting as though they have no idea who I am.

Isn’t that unfair? Me being who I am, I say Hi and in return I get a spit in my face like a scum. Life is just not how we expect it to be. Our environment is slowly turning into a trash can because there is no ‘respect’. Don’t you think life is just unpredictable? Although, it doesn’t always end up like this. I wake up every day with a smile on my face, ready to meet the people who make my day.

Isn’t that just fantastic? Don’t you sometimes get the feeling that life is just perfect? Why wouldn’t it be? We make up our society, and bring the brightness upon the environment.

Proficient in: Behavior

“ She followed all my directions. It was really easy to contact her and respond very fast as well. ”

I remember those moments of my childhood like a clear glass; running to the park just to meet my friends so we can go out to play. We was like a rugby team, we followed each other’s footstep from back to forth. Do you remember those moments? I bet you do because life was bright. It’s always a classic when your friends go against you for no particular reasons.

Oh wait, how could I forget? Gossip- it’s like the world is being covered by a cloth which no one is able to see the true side of life. It’s that unfair? Well, when you get embarrassed and humiliated in front of the whole school because of a misunderstanding. Is that unfair? Yes it is. The environment is being isolated with darkness and unfairness. On the other hand, maybe our society is being seen in a wrong prospectus. We make life fair. Don’t we? Have you ever been a victim of a crime? No? Have you ever got punished for a particular reason? No? Then why should we complain. Our life is made up of shiny silver which glows upon everyone.

There is always that feeling when you do something for someone, but think whether they will do the same for you. Believe me they do! Every help and support I gave to them, I received the same even more. How does that feel? Amazing! In my opinion I believe life is fair. We make our society and bring the goodness upon all. When you experience a moment, you will always cherish it in our heart and realise that whatever happens- life is fair. “What you give, you get”, it’s true! I had so many experiences in my life that, when something negative appears I just think of those moments which changes my opinion about the life we live in.

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The Enemy Of Average

Why Is Life So Unfair? (And What You Can Do About It)

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Why is life so unfair?

During periods of struggle, I’m guessing that you’ve asked yourself this question. It’s only natural when life seems to be punishing you for no other reason than to be cruel.

The truth though, is that you’re stronger than your circumstances. No matter the injustice that life throws your way, you can overcome these struggles.

And even more than that, you can use the unfairness of your life to your benefit by making something of yourself despite the suffering.

This article will delve deeper into the question of why is life so unfair, and then talk about several different strategies you can implement to combat the unfairness of life.

3 Reasons Why Life Is So Unfair

It’s true that every job applicant should be judged strictly on merit, regardless of family background or connections.

It’s true that in an ideal world, we’d all endure the same level of suffering, trauma, and loss.

It’s true that if life was completely fair, we’d all be born into families with the same level of opportunity and wealth.

But we don’t live in a fair world, and we never will. You’re never going to be playing the game of life on a level playing field.

Before going into what you can do about this, here’s 3 simple reasons why you’ll never stop asking the question, “why is life so unfair?”

#1: Everyone Wants What You Want

If you’re reading this article, it likely means that you want more out of life. Well, the reality is that so does everyone else. 

Many times in life, we get into trouble when we think we’re special. 

This belief manifests itself in conditions like social anxiety, which plagued my life for years. For those of you who aren’t familiar with social anxiety, it’s an anxiety disorder that’s characterized by an intense fear of being judged negatively by other people in social situations.

It’s an irrational and debilitating fear. And even though the belief comes more from a place of fear than arrogance, it’s actually quite a self-centered approach to the world — it assumes that you’re special, and that people are watching your every move waiting for you to slip up.

The reality is far different — people are so consumed with their own thoughts that our actions aren’t nearly as important as we think they are.

The belief that we’re special also causes problems when it comes to assessing our own level of ambition. I’m a huge offender of this, because for a long time I believed I was special for having so much ambition. 

I wasn’t special at all! Everyone wants to achieve their goals and dreams . Everyone wants to be happier, richer, and more fulfilled. 

The world isn’t fair because everyone is in a race to get the best of everything in life, and some people are given a significant head start. 

• Some people will possess more talent than you.  
• Some people will be born with more natural intelligence than you. 
• Some people will have more opportunities due to their family’s socioeconomic status
• Some people will encounter improbable strokes of luck that greatly accelerate their progress

You might not have any of these advantages while going after the life you want. 

Is that fair? Nope. 

Is that just how life is and how it always will be? Yes.

#2: Self Interest Reigns Supreme

Sometimes other people are the biggest culprits of us asking the question, “why is life so unfair?”

Maybe at one point you developed feelings for someone and they didn’t feel the same way. 

Maybe you’ve been let go from a job because management decided that they needed to cut back on staff to improve margins.

Maybe you’ve been on the wrong end of gossip about your personal life that’s had a negative impact on your personal relationships.

In all of these events, self-interest is driving behavior. At the end of the day, when faced with a decision, most people will place their needs above the needs of others.

It’s a survival instinct that’s been hard-wired into us over thousands of years of evolution — we all do what we feel we need to do to survive and thrive in this world.

It’s not evil, it’s just human nature. At some point, you’ve likely made a decision to benefit your own self-interests that’s negatively affected the lives of other people, even if you didn’t know it at the time.

Does that make you a bad person? Of course not, it just means that you did what you thought was best for you, which is what we’re all trying to do in this world.

#3: Pain Doesn’t Affect Everyone Equally

Right before we both started high school, one of my best friends lost his mother to cancer.

She was a wonderful woman, and I couldn’t believe she had been taken from the world such an early age (she was in her late 40’s when she died)

I also couldn’t comprehend why this was happening to my friend, who now had to go through the rest of his life with a gaping hole in his heart. Incredible pain had been inflicted upon him, and there was nothing he could do about it.

This taught me a very important lesson about the nature of the world — pain doesn’t distribute itself equally among the population.

It’s true that life is suffering, yet some people feel the weight of this suffering significantly more than others do. As you’re reading this right now, there are some truly horrible things happening in the world.

• Sons/daughters are losing their mothers and fathers unexpectedly
• Mothers giving birth are losing their babies in the womb
• Innocent people are becoming the victims of evil crimes

Events like these are inevitable, and when they happen to you or someone you’re close to, it’s understandable to wonder why is life so unfair.

And yet, there’s nothing you can do about it. You can’t change the fact that bad things are going to happen to good people, all you can do is hope that they don’t directly affect you or the people you care about.

We’re all going to experience pain in our lives. For some of you, the level of pain you experience will be healthy and manageable.

Unfortunately, there are some of you reading this who have endured, or will have to endure a tremendous level of physical and emotional pain. You’ll constantly be questioning “why is life so unfair? ” and wonder why the world is such a cruel, nasty place.

Where you end up on the sliding scale of pain largely comes down to luck — the only thing you can do is focus on managing whatever comes your way.

What Should You Do When Life Is Unfair? (4 Tips)

We can’t change the fact that life is unfair, so what can we do to combat the inevitable suffering that life will throw at us?

Here’s four different things you can do to push back against the unfairness of life:

• Focus Only On What You Can Control
• Seize Your Opportunities
• Let Your Work Ethic Define You
• Prepare For The Worst By Controlling Your Environment

The rest of this article will cover each of these strategies in more detail and give you a roadmap for tilting the odds of fate in your favor.

#1: Focus Only On What You Control

When things aren’t going your way, it’s easy to lash out at the world being cruel. Unfortunately, no amount of complaining about the external world will change it’s unfair nature.

At some point, instead of constantly asking yourself, “why is life so unfair?”, you have to shift your internal dialogue.

Here’s a more productive question — Despite what life is throwing my way, what can I do to fight back?

The game of life is won by people who master what’s within their control, and let go of the things that they can’t control..

Get laid off from your job? Sure, it’s not going to feel good in the present moment, and it’s okay to sit with that pain for a few days.

But when the resentment fades, you’re given two choices:

• Option #1: Continue to sit and wallow in your anger, using the pain as an excuse to stagnate and not look for any other opportunities. 
• Option #2: Focus on what’s within your control and execute the action steps necessary to make the best out of a bad  situation.

You can choose to start rebuilding your resume and tailor it to the job that you want to find next.

You can look in the mirror and honestly assess your own performance, and craft a plan for fixing the weaknesses that played a role in you being let go.

You can choose to send in 5-10 job applications per day so that you give yourself the best chance of landing back on your feet.

These are all positive actions that would improve this situation, and you have total control over whether or not you execute them.

So whatever the source of unnecessary pain in your life, write down 5-10 action steps that you can complete that will address this source of pain.

You can’t take on all 5-10 at once, so focus on one at a time and make incremental progress every single day. And if you have the self-discipline to do that, you may find that the world is a much more opportunistic place when you show some grit.

#2: Seize Your Opportunities  

Given that the world is an unfair place, you must take advantage of opportunities that the world throws your way.

Successful people are masters of seizing opportunity. Average people tend to let opportunities pass them by and then curse the world for their bad fortune.

The world doesn’t distribute it’s opportunities to everyone equally. Some people get the benefit of being in the right place at the right time more often than others, but we’re all in that position at one point or another.

The only question is whether or not you’re going to act at that moment.

I guarantee that if you look back on the positive events that have happened in your life, most of them were preceded by you seizing an opportunity.

The dilemma with opportunities is that capitalizing on them requires getting outside of your comfort zone. The single biggest culprit of a failure to seize opportunity tracks back to fear — fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear being negatively judged by others, etc.

If you want to make your own luck in this world, you have to get comfortable with fear. You must learn to take action in spite of it when opportunities arise.

One of the best ways to do this is through comfort zone challenges, which essentially force you to practice facing your fears.

The inherent nature of comfort zone challenges is that there’s potential for embarrassment or rejection. And although it feels scary to embrace these emotions in the moment, what lies on the other side is a greater sense of freedom.

Each time you face fear despite your brain’s urges to retreat, you build up evidence in your brain that you can handle discomfort and take risks in spite of your emotions.

And when you become that kind of person, seizing opportunities becomes far easier.

#3: Let Your Work Ethic Define You

There are a bunch of things in life that you have no control over.

You don’t have control over whether or not you were born into money. You don’t have control over your genetic code. You don’t have control over the actions of others, and the negative consequences of those actions on your own life.

With that being said, there’s one thing that you always have control over no matter how dire your situation is, and that’s your work ethic.

Working hard doesn’t guarantee success, it just tilts the odds in your favor. And the level to which the odds shift in your favor is directly related to your level of commitment to your craft.

Early on this blogging journey of mine, I realized that I didn’t have much control over when it was going to start to take off:

• I couldn’t control whether or not my guest posts to other blogs were accepted or not
• I couldn’t control whether or not other influencers in the self-improvement world would mention my content or not
• I couldn’t control the speed at which my content would start to rank in Google.

However, I did have control over the amount of posts I published each week. 

In the blogging world, more posts means more opportunities to rank in Google. More opportunities to rank means more traffic. More traffic means more money, and more money means having the resources to make this my full-time career.

Published posts is the one key metric that makes all of the things listed above possible. Furthermore, it’s something that I have 100% control over, which means it deserves every ounce of my limited focus and attention.

Now for you, this key metric may be different. In any endeavor, there’s a number of different actions that can improve your chances of success. 

However, there’s typically one thing you have control over that has the greatest influence on your overall happiness, fulfillment, and success.

So instead of asking yourself “why is life so unfair?” ask yourself this:

What’s my one key metric? What’s the one daily action that will significantly move the needle in my personal and professional life?

If you work in sales, that one key metric might be the number of calls you make every single day or the number of emails you send out.

If you’re a writer, that one key metric might be the number of words you write every single day.

If you have aspirations to become a world-class chef, that one key metric might be the number of classes you take to improve your craft.

Focusing on this metric won’t guarantee success, but it will give you a chance to smartly outwork everyone who wants what you want. And you’ll be less affected by the slings and arrows of fate when you adopt 100% responsibility for a metric that has a tremendous impact on your outcomes.

#4: Prepare For The Worst By Controlling Your Environment

“Environment is the invisible hand that shapes human  behavior.” ~ James Clear

Oftentimes, we underestimate the impact of our environment. This is a fatal mistake because human beings are a product of the environments that they’re in. 

Given that the world can be an unfair place, we need to do as many things as possible to tilt the odds in our favor.

If you were to suddenly lose a family member due to illness, would you have a strong social support system to rely on? Or, would your lack of social connection accentuate the despair that comes along with losing a loved one?

The world taking away someone that you love is a horrible tragedy that you can’t prevent. However, the strength of your personal relationships is an environmental factor that influences how you come out of this tragedy.

It also happens to be 100% controllable. There are several other examples that we could dive into, but the bottom line is this:

Bad things are going to happen to you in life. Most of the time you don’t know when, where, why or how they will happen, but be rest assured that your day is coming. The only thing you can do to prepare for adversity is to design your environment in a way that facilitates your ability to handle the consequences of fate.

The type of people that you associate with. The ease of access to distractions that impede your personal and professional growth. The places that you choose to spend time in.

These are all environmental factors that you can determine, life doesn’t have to determine these for you. And when adversity hits, these factors often play a huge role in the way you handle it.

Why Is Life So Unfair Quotes

I think a nice way to wrap up this article is to mention some inspirational quotes about the unfairness of life and the power we have to overcome it.

So without further ado, here’s a list of hard hitting quotes that highlight the harsh nature of life, and what we can do about it.

• “Life is unfair but remember sometimes it is unfair in your favor.” ~ Peter Ustinov
• “So I came to the realization. Nothing in life is unfair. It’s just life.” ~ Rob Lowe
• “Inside of a ring or out, ain’t nothing wrong with going down. It’s staying down that’s wrong.” ~ Muhammad Ali
• “The problem isn’t that life is unfair — it’s our broken idea of fairness. Meaning, our idea of fairness is self-centered.” ~ Tony Warrick
• “The only thing that makes life unfair is the delusion that it should be fair.” ~ Dr. Steve Maraboli
• “ One of the most fascinating lessons I’ve absorbed about life is that struggle is good.” ~ Joe Rogan
• “The happiest people don’t bother about whether life is unfair. They just concentrate on what they have.” ~ Andrew Matthews
• “Life happened. In all its banality, cruelty, and unfairness. But also in its beauty, pleasures, and delights. Life happened.” ~ Thirty Umrigar
• “Life isn’t fair. It never will be. Quit trying to make it fair. You don’t need it to be fair. Go make life unfair to your advantages.” ~ Robert Kiyosaki
• “Life isn’t fair. No matter what life throws your way, no matter how unfair it may seem, refuse to play the victim. Refuse to be ruled by fear, pessimism, and negativity. Refuse to quit. Be a warrior and work through whatever life throws your way with courage, love, and positivity.” ~ Zero Dean
• “When life puts you in touchy situations, don’t say “Why Me?” Just say “Try me.” ~ Dwayne Johnson
• “Sometimes the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us.” ~ Unknown
• “Sometimes it takes a good fall to know where you really stand.” ~ Hayley Williams
• “Sometimes, life is unfair and you have to suck it up and move on and not use it as an excuse.” ~ Robert Kraft

Final Thoughts: Why Is Life So Unfair

The world isn’t always going to act in your favor, so you must learn to act on the world and make the best of your situation.

Usually, this means focusing on what you can control. The world can be a horrifying unfair place, but it also rewards those with the courage to become the master of their fate.

If you accept the fact that life is unfair instead of cursing the fact that it is, you’ll be more likely to work towards your goals and dreams with persistence and perseverance, knowing that you and you alone are responsible for creating your own happiness.

Hopefully the tips outlined in this article put you on the path to doing just that.

• You Are Who You Surround Yourself With: Choose Wisely
• 10 Reasons You’re Feeling Unfulfilled (And How To Address Them)
• How To Be Consistent: 5 Tips To Master Daily Action
• 25 Best Spartan Quotes Of All-Time

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Why Is Life So Unfair? 7 Key Reasons and How to Deal With Them

It’s pouring rain. You’re on your way to a first date, and your car breaks down.

You go to call an auto service, and your cell phone battery’s flat. Maybe you can walk to the gas station you saw down the road instead. You check and realize you left your umbrella at home… again.

“Why is life so unfair?” you wail to the dark, gray sky.

If questions of unfairness are running through your mind on repeat right now, check out this guide to discover key reasons life is unfair and find out what you can do about it.

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1. You View Life As a Competition

Failing at the competition that is life is one of the main reasons a person might ask, “Why is life unfair?” But it turns out that the competition might be all in our heads.

The Explanation

It’s not untrue to say that life is a competition. From a very young age, we’re taught to excel—in school work, sports, and more.

This usually involves competing against our peers for higher math grades or that coveted gold medal in track.

Of course, everyone can’t be at the top. (Though today, participation trophies are just as celebrated by many parents as a first-place ribbon… as they should be!)

But being at the bottom of any type of ranking—whether you missed out on the painting prize as a kid or the job promotion as an adult—can make you feel like you were handed a bad lot in life.

The Solution

Thankfully, it turns out the only person you’re competing with in life is yourself!

To help overcome that feeling of failure, you need to focus on what you can control, not what you can’t.

In most parts of your life, you get to decide what you eat when, who you interact with, what you do for work, and, most importantly, how you react to circumstances you’re faced with.

And any time you feel like you have a hard time deciding how to feel or react, you can choose to take a break from the situation.

2. You Can’t Find Happiness

Honestly, life is unfair at times. Some people focus so much and so often on the unfairness of it all that they struggle to find happiness in their lives.

There have been many studies into happiness in recent years. Yale University even hosts a Coursera course on the science behind the feeling. Clearly, we’re all fascinated with the subject.

You might believe that it’s unfair you can’t find happiness when everyone around you appears so, well, happy . And that’s the key: they appear so. But are they really?

It turns out that many (dare we say most ) of us simply aren’t happy. We’re too wrapped up in trying to achieve things we perceive will make us happy but… won’t.

Things like material wealth, professional success, and harmonious relationships.

So, how can we shake this feeling of unfairness at not being happy and feel satisfied with our life? It turns out calm-loving groups like Buddhist monks have it right.

The path to happiness involves slowing down, disconnecting (from the world around you as much as the internet), and learning to just… Let. It. Go.

• Start a meditation practice
• Connect (really connect) with friends and family regularly
• Take care of your mental health (which means seeking professional advice when you need it)
• Aim to earn around $95,000 a year—a figure studies show leads to life satisfaction

3. Everyone Wants the Same Thing As You

You think you know what you want, and you don’t have it. What’s more, you think everyone else has it. And this makes you feel like life is so unfair.

Surprise! It’s not that simple.

So, you think you’re unique. And it’s not surprising. Most of us do—because we’re told we are by our grandparents, parents, teachers, and best friends.

It’s not to say you’re not special. Everyone is… genetically speaking.

The problem is that many of us fail to realize that everyone else thinks they’re special, too. And they’re striving for the same milestones you are.

It can start to feel unfair when others hit milestones that seem out of reach for you.

The fact is, someone is always going to be more talented, smarter, wealthier, or [insert adjective of your choice] than you.

Acceptance.

That’s it. Just one word.

The minute you start questioning why everyone else seems to have it so easy, take a step back. Look carefully at your life.

If you really think about it, doesn’t your life resemble more of a roller coaster than a downward spiral? It’s full of highs and lows, sure, but a lot of it follows a steady middle-of-the-road track.

You need to accept that you won’t always be the fastest, the strongest, the richest, the smartest, the bravest, the most traveled, and so on.

And that’s totally okay.

When you fail to meet your expectations, accept that as nothing more than objective fact… and move on.

4. Comparison Is the Thief of Joy

Comparing yourself to others may be another reason you’re asking, “Why is life unfair?” And it’s no wonder when we’re bombarded with images of other people’s “perfect lives” on social media.

People have compared their situation to that of others for decades. Think of the “keeping up with the Joneses” homeowners of the 1950s and 1960s.

But just because we’ve done it for ages doesn’t make it the right thing to do. In fact, it’s one of the main reasons leading you to think life isn’t fair.

Comparing your life to how you perceive others is a recipe for unhappiness. Unless you know someone very well (and we mean every aspect of their past and current life), it’s impossible to know the privileges they’ve been exposed to.

You also don’t know if the life they’re projecting into the world is just that—a projection. It’s an illusion built on things like debt or deceit.

There are a few things you can do to squash your comparison habit.

First, learn to recognize your triggers—that is, know when you’re most susceptible to falling into the comparison trap.

Perhaps it’s when you’re mindlessly scrolling through your socials at the end of a long day. Maybe it’s when you’re window shopping on your way to the bus stop after work. Then, limit your time spent on those platforms or in those places.

Next, try to give yourself some grace. Comparison often comes from a place of guilt or shame that we haven’t achieved what we thought we would be on a set date or within a specific timeframe. But life is a journey, not a race. Be compassionate with yourself.

Consider, too, that others may be thinking the same thing about you! Write down all the things that others might covet in your life and celebrate them.

5. You View Yourself As a Victim

Sometimes, feeling like life is unfair sometimes (or all the time) is a matter of perception. If you constantly perceive yourself as a victim of circumstance, you’ll always feel like you’ve lucked out.

If you consider yourself a victim at all times, it can lead to feelings of powerlessness. And this can, in turn, make you feel that life is always mistreating you.

Of course, there are many legitimate reasons to feel victimized. You should never discount those feelings in situations where they’re warranted.

Feeling victimized can be an alarm bell that lets you know you’re in a dangerous, unjust, or traumatizing situation.

Instead, we’re saying that if you always feel victimized, take a step back and examine the problem from all sides.

Bad things happen every day to pretty much everyone. But instead of shutting down when the inevitable occurs, you can learn to build resilience in the face of adversity.

One helpful technique is shifting the narrative from victim to survivor. The latter has positive connotations of fortitude, allowing you to play an active rather than passive role in your future.

Mindfulness meditation can help you build resilience, as can connecting with support groups and engaging in self-care practices.

But don’t be shy to seek professional help (such as mental health counseling or therapy) if you’re struggling.

6. You’re Consumed by Self-Interest

Life is not fair, right? Well, it seems the answer to that question all depends on how self-interested (or self-centered) you are!

It turns out you might be your own worst enemy when deciding whether life is fair (or unfair, as the case may be). And the culprit is self-interest.

Self-interest is defined by someone placing their needs above others—sometimes or always. In other words, they desire a positive outcome for themselves in every interaction and event that takes place in their lives.

Consider this scenario: you and several other staff have been let go from work due to downsizing. You could take this personally, thinking that it’s a case of unfairness.

In fact, it has nothing to do with you. The economy is in a downturn, and the company simply can’t afford to keep on that many staff.

If you want to stop being so self-centered, you need to work on your mindset. This can be tough for someone used to always putting themselves first.

Some tips include:

• Giving others your full attention (i.e., listening to the thoughts of others)
• Getting into the habit of putting yourself in someone else’s shoes (cultivate empathy)
• Using more “we,” “them,” “they,” and “you” statements over “I” or “me”
• Working on your ability to compromise with others
• Sharing praise and attention with others on your team
• Avoiding the leadership role—at least some of the time
• Celebrating the success of others

Try incorporating some gratitude exercises into your daily routine to help you overcome feelings of self-interest.

7. You Seem to Be Really Unlucky

There are all sorts of superstitions related to luck. Everything from walking under a ladder to breaking a mirror can supposedly give you bad luck.

Sometimes, thinking you’re unlucky can lead to a sense of unfairness.

Have you ever heard the one about the pothole? The more you focus on a pothole in the road, the more likely you are to drive over it.

The gist is that the more you focus on the bad things in life, the more they seem to happen.

Feeling down on your luck is legitimate, but it often stems from poor framing than any actual possibility of being cursed with so-called “bad luck.”

You may view life too negatively, be a passive rather than active participant in your life, or have crafted your entire identity around the difficulties you experience.

You may also suffer from anxiety—a mental health condition that can be treated with therapy and medication (or both).

A lot of this stems from worrying too much about what already happened (the past) and what might happen (the future).

You must remember that you can’t change the past—what has happened is already behind you. You need to learn to move on.

And the future, well, there’s no way of knowing what the future holds for any of us, no matter how many tarot card readers or fortune tellers you visit.

Using techniques like mindfulness, physical exercise, and journaling to focus on the present can help you overcome the sense that you’re experiencing bad luck.

After all, the present is predictable and safe.

Why Is Life So Unfair? Explained

Every single one of us has—at one time or another—pondered the answer to the question, “Why is life so unfair?”

It could be because you’re unable to conceive that much-wanted child. Perhaps you missed out on your shot at the Olympics.

Or maybe it was something more mundane, like no one leaving you a slice of the cake a colleague brought into the office.

But maybe it’s just a case of reframing these struggles. After all, without them, we wouldn’t appreciate the good times.

Did you like this article about the unfairness of life? Check out this one about yoga and transcendental meditation mantras next!

162 Supreme Self-Love Bio for Instagram Suggestions

Quality Over Quantity: Meaning, Examples, and Benefits

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Psychology Spot

All About Psychology

Life is unfair, so what?

We believe that life should be fair. We believe that “good” people deserve good things and that “bad” people should be punished. We believe that if we do good works, the universe is obliged to give them back to us. We believe that there is a universal justice that gives everyone what deserves.

Without a doubt, life would be infinitely better if things were fair. It would be great if we could always get what we work for, or if the universe would reward our good deeds in some way. Unfortunately, life is not fair. And the sooner we assume it, the better is.

When the sense of justice turns into a magical thought

Magical thinking is characteristic of young children, but adults are not immune to that too. Magical thinking occurs when we make illogical attributions of causality without empirical evidence to support them, such as when we believe that our ideas or expectations may have direct consequences in the external world.

Our belief that the world is fair can easily transmute into magical thinking. For example, a study conducted at the Fisher College of Business found that when we are regualr customers of a business, we believe that we are more likely than others to receive an award in that business. This phenomenon, known as “lucky loyalty”, is based on the idea that we deserve a reward for our loyalty. It is a magical thought because it does not take into account the statistical probabilities.

That same belief is what leads us to invest in karma . In another experiment conducted at the University of Virginia, psychologists appreciated that at a job fair, people who were led to believe that the job search process was out of their control, offered to donate more money to a charity not related to job givers, compared to those who were led to believe that finding a job was up to them.

Later, job seekers who were led to believe their search was out of their control, were more optimistic about their job prospects when they gave money to charity than those who did not. That means that deep down they believed the universe would reward their good deed. Of course, being optimistic is not a negative thing, but sitting and waiting for the world to reward us is not a guarantee of good results.

Thinking that life should be fair comforts us, but it also has a dark side

We all have a deep-seated sense of justice that can be wronged in many ways. While it’s important to strive to create a fairer and more equitable playing field in life, there are times when that sensitivity doesn’t help much in the long run. So sometimes it is valuable to hold on to our sense of justice, but sometimes we must be mature enough to give up the belief that life should be fair.

The belief that the world should be a fair and equitable place gives us confidence and security. It supports our psychological balance. In fact, among the survivors of the 2008 Sichuan earthquake in which nearly 90,000 people died, those who lost family and friends were more likely to believe that life is unfair. However, those who continued to believe that the world was fair suffered less anxiety and depression, as showed by a study conducted at Peking University.

However, believing that life is fair has also a darker side. Albert Ellis, for example, was convinced that there are three monsters that prevent us from moving forward: “I have to do it well, you have to treat me well and the world should be easy.” This psychologist was convinced that the belief that life should be fair actually becomes an obstacle that generates unhappiness.

In fact, this belief can even lead us to be more insensitive, biased and unfair. A study conducted at Purdue University revealed that people who believe in universal justice are less likely to hire a candidate who has been fired. That’s because they think there must be a reason, that that candidate has been, in some way, punished for his bad behavior or inefficiency. Obviously, this is not always the case.

Unrealistic expectations condemn us to frustration

When we believe that the others should behave in a kind manner or that we should not encounter obstacles in our way, we are actually feeding unrealistic expectations. Sooner rather than later, reality will make us see that it is not like that, that things do not work that way and that sometimes life is unfair.

Then we will get frustrated. As young children, we will feel confused, aggrieved, and disoriented, wondering what has happened. We cannot make sense of a chaotic world without apparent justice and order in which bad things happen to good people and vice versa.

At that point we can become extremely disappointed, sad, or angry. However, the truth is that these feelings are usually not useful to rectify an unfair situation. Rather the opposite. It is likely that on more than one occasion these emotions have made the situation worse, because they cloud our rational mind and prevent us from finding assertive strategies to deal with what is happening.

In fact, there are people who can carry that pain, disappointment and anger for years, which will end up embittering their life completely. These people cling to their hurts and wrongs, becoming eternal victims of the injustices of life. They go around the world lamenting: “Life is unfair to me!” In those cases, obviously, the sense of justice does not help us. Rather, it becomes a source of distress.

Accepting that life is unfair and move on

Albert Ellis noted that “Even injustice has positive aspects. It challenges us to be as happy as we can be in an unfair world.” Being happy, feeling fulfilled and complete when the world is going well and rewards us has no merit. The real merit consists in developing the psychological tools that allow us to maintain inner peace in the midst of the storm, when the world is extremely unfair.

When bad things happen to us, we can either waste all of our energy complaining about how unfair life is, or we can accept that obviousness and move on. If the universe has not kept track of our good deeds, we can do nothing but accept it.

Ellis explained that “Reality is not so much what happens to us, but rather what we think about the events that create the reality that we experience. That means that each of us creates the reality in which he lives”. We have enormous power to build thoughts, feelings and actions that can help us live in a more balanced way or, conversely, that lead to self-destructive behaviors.

Accepting that life is not fair does not mean allowing everyone to step over us or violate our rights. We must also be able to set limits by following our sense of justice and right. We just have to be careful that that sense of justice does not become a double-edged sword, because we can easily lose perspective and fight a battle that is lost beforehand or poison ourselves with the bitterness of grievance.

The notion of what is fair is seductive, but we must be pragmatic. We will find it easier to assertively deal with a grievance when we accept the “apparent” unfairness in life. We can believe that the courts were created to protect us and to dispense justice. That’s fine. But we must also be aware that sometimes the justice system can be quite unfair.

Sometimes we just have to let go of that desire to find meaning in everything, an order behind the chaos that explains what we refuse to accept: that bad things happen to “good” people and good things happen to “bad” people.

In short, we need to understand that stubbornly insisting on the belief that life is unfair to us will inevitably deepen our pain or anger and hinder us in the grievance, preventing us from moving forward.

Walker, R. et. Al. (2014) Lucky Loyalty: The Effect of Consumer Effort on Predictions of Randomly Determined Marketing Outcomes.  Journal of Consumer Research ; 41(4): 1065–1077.

Risen, J. L. et. Al. (2012) Investing in Karma: When Wanting Promotes Helping.  Psychological Science ; 23(8): 923-930.

Xie, X. et. Al. (2011) Belief in a Just World When Encountering the 5/12 Wenchuan Earthquake.  Environment and Behavior ; 43(4): 1-21.

Jennifer Delgado

I am a psychologist and I spent several years writing articles for scientific journals specialized in Health and Psychology. I want to help you create great experiences. Learn more about me .

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Keep Learning

How to Deal With Unfairness

Override your gut reactions before you make matters worse..

Posted August 17, 2011 | Reviewed by Ekua Hagan

Have you ever had a knee-jerk reaction to someone who cuts in front of you on the road (or should I say a mouth or finger-jerk reaction)? Have you glared at the person in front of you in the express lane at the grocery store who has too many items? Or have you fantasized about gluing the mouth shut of the person who interrupts you while you are talking and he doesn't let you finish?

Do other people's behaviors send you into a rage or cause you to feel so frustrated you shut down?

This is standard human behavior under the influence of unfairness.

When we feel something is unfair, we respond as if it were a threat and go into "fight or flight" mode. Or as Laura Cousino Klein, Ph.D. said about women in the famous study she led on women, stress , and friendship , we go into fight, flight, or call-a-friend-and-complain mode.

Many neuroscientists are using brain scans to study moral decision making . They have found that basic, primary reactions occur when your brain determines a situation is "just not fair" — demonstrating that your reactions are instinctually, not logically driven.

Steven Quartz from CalTech said , "The fact that the brain has such a robust response to unfairness suggests that sensing unfairness is a basic evolved capacity."

How does this play out? The moment your brain determines someone is not playing by the rules, your abilities to deliberate, weigh all sides of an issue and make thoughtful decisions are impaired.

Additionally, when you feel cheated your emotional system immediately prods you to say "no" to the offenders without thinking through your response and the consequences of your reaction. You can see this play out daily in our political system.

The Problem: Not everyone plays by the same set of rules. Cultural and religious background, family upbringing, education and life experiences all combine to help you form a mental frame called, "the world according to me." Other than legal and safety issues, these rules are often based on personal bias and opinions of what you think is right and wrong. You then act as if these rules are cast in stone when they actually differ from one person to the next.

The Result: You make snap decisions and emotionally react, then rationalize and justify your response using your logical brain.

The world is full of smart people who litter, plot against co-workers, scream at politicians at town hall meetings and give unaware grocery clerks the evil eye as they deal with what they believe is unfair.

1. Try to become aware of what your brain is doing. When you feel something is unfair or disrespectful of your rights, catch yourself reacting in anger or frustration. Then take a breath before you say or do anything to make the situation worse.

2. Determine if your loss is real or not. Is the rule you think was broken that important, really? Did the person who offended you take anything away from you other than a few minutes of your time? Was the action you resent a conscious offense or could the person have acted without realizing the impact on you? Did you lose your self-respect or respect from others? If the loss is not real or too small to bother with, choose to relax and let go. Then focus on something more interesting.

On the other hand, if the person who interrupted you is being intentionally rude or the person in the grocery store needs help finding the right lane, you might choose to let the person know the impact of their behavior and what would be a better choice they could make in the future. Screaming, sarcasm, or grunting creates conflict; it doesn't solve anything. If the loss is real, stand up for yourself by explaining the Impact and Desired Change of Behavior . Hopefully, this will start a useful dialogue.

3. Sometimes it is better to choose to be healthy instead of right. You decide where to put your most precious resource-your energy. Let go of what you cannot control.

In the end, one of the greatest gifts you can give to yourself is to learn to quickly discern when it is time to let go from when it is time to react. There are times you need to stand up to what is unfair. There are times to move on.

This takes practice. Don't beat yourself up for having an emotional reaction. Your brain is doing what it is supposed to do-protect you. Instead, recognize when you are having an emotional reaction, take a breath and choose how you best want to respond.

It's time we take charge of our primitive brains, bringing more peace to our lives and to our world.

Marcia Reynolds, Psy.D. is the author of Wander Woman: How High-Achieving Women Find Contentment and Direction.

Marcia Reynolds, Psy.D. , is the author of three leadership books, Coach the Person, Not the Problem, The Discomfort Zone, and Wander Woman . She is the president of Covisioning, teaching transformational coaching skills to coaches and leaders worldwide.

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Life is Unfair Quotes

Life is unfair, but that doesn’t mean we should stop fighting for what’s right.

In the game of life, sometimes the dice are loaded against us.

Life’s unfairness is a reminder to appreciate the moments of joy and happiness we do have.

The unfairness of life teaches us to be resilient and find strength in adversity.

Life’s unfairness might knock us down, but it’s up to us to choose to get back up.

Life is unfair, but it’s our job to make it fairer for future generations.

Even in the face of life’s unfairness, we can still find beauty and meaning.

The unfairness of life makes us appreciate the moments of fairness even more.

Life’s unfairness is a reminder to never take anything for granted.

The unfairness of life can be a catalyst for change and growth.

Despite life’s unfairness, we can choose to be kind and compassionate.

The unfairness of life reminds us to be grateful for what we have.

Life may be unfair, but we have the power to create our own destiny.

The unfairness of life is a call to action, to make a difference in the world.

Life’s unfairness challenges us to find our inner strength and keep pushing forward.

The unfairness of life is a reminder that we all have our own battles to fight.

Life may be unfair, but it’s our choice to either become bitter or strive for greatness.

The unfairness of life teaches us to appreciate the good moments, no matter how fleeting.

No matter how unfair life may seem, we always have the power to choose how we react.

The unfairness of life can be a motivator to challenge the status quo and fight for justice.

Life’s unfairness reminds us to show empathy and kindness to others going through their own battles.

The unfairness of life is a reminder to focus on what we can control, rather than what we can’t.

Life may be unfair, but it’s up to us to create our own opportunities and seize them.

The unfairness of life is a reminder that we are stronger than we think.

No matter how unfair life may seem, there is always hope for a better tomorrow.

The unfairness of life challenges us to confront our fears and overcome them.

Life may not always be fair, but we can choose to be fair in our actions and decisions.

The unfairness of life teaches us to be resilient and find our inner courage.

No matter how unfair life may be, we always have the power to choose our own happiness.

The unfairness of life is a reminder that we are all on our own unique journey.

Life’s unfairness is an opportunity for growth and self-discovery.

The unfairness of life can be a catalyst for change and innovation.

No matter how unfair life may seem, we can still find beauty in the imperfect moments.

The unfairness of life reminds us to never lose sight of our dreams and goals.

Life may be unfair, but it’s our job to make it fairer for others.

The unfairness of life challenges us to find our own path and define our own success.

No matter how unfair life may be, we can still find joy in the simple things.

The unfairness of life teaches us to be grateful for the moments of fairness we do experience.

Life’s unfairness is a reminder to treat others with compassion and understanding.

The unfairness of life can be a catalyst for personal growth and transformation.

No matter how unfair life may seem, we always have the power to choose how we respond.

The unfairness of life challenges us to find our inner resilience and keep going.

Life may be unfair, but it’s up to us to create our own opportunities.

The unfairness of life reminds us to appreciate the moments of joy and happiness when they come.

No matter how unfair life may be, we can still find beauty in the midst of chaos.

The unfairness of life teaches us to be adaptable and embrace change.

Life’s unfairness is an opportunity to learn and grow from our experiences.

The unfairness of life challenges us to find our own inner strength and rise above the circumstances.

No matter how unfair life may seem, we have the power to create our own happiness.

The unfairness of life reminds us to be kind to ourselves and others, for we never know what battles people are fighting.

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This Day in Quotes

The famous quotations and phrases linked to each day of the year

“Life is unfair,” as President John F. Kennedy famously observed on this date…

Many people are familiar with the famous quotation by President John F. Kennedy , “Life is unfair.”

But few people today remember or know the context of this quote.

It was something he said, in part, with respect to what would become the Vietnam War .

In 1961, the newly-elected president decided to send more than a thousand American “military advisors” to South Vietnam, where the pro-Western regime of President Ngo Dinh Diem faced mounting threats from Communist insurgents and the North Vietnamese army.

In 1962, Kennedy increased the American presence in Vietnam to nearly 10,000 troops.

When Army reservists began being called up to serve there, after recently being stationed on another Cold War front in West Berlin, some complained that they had “done their time” and expressed their resentment by holding public demonstrations. One reservist even began a hunger strike.

President Kennedy was asked about this opposition during a press conference held on March 21, 1962 .

He responded by saying that calling up the reservists “strengthened the foreign policy of the United States.”

After making this political point, Kennedy waxed philosophical.

“There is always inequity in life,” he said. “Some men are killed in a war and some men are wounded, and some men never leave the country, and some men are stationed in the Antarctic and some are stationed in San Francisco. It’s very hard in military or in personal life to assure complete equality. Life is unfair.”

Since then, those last three words have often been quoted, generally without any context.

When put into the original context, this quote might not fit the liberal image of JFK that many people have.

In fact, Kennedy was a committed Cold Warrior . He essentially accepted the “Domino theory” articulated by his predecessor, President Dwight D. Eisenhower , and believed the spread of Communism needed to be stopped—by military means if necessary.

Thus, Kennedy shared Eisenhower’s concern that a potential takeover of South Vietnam by Communists could cause more “falling dominos” in Southeast Asia.

Eisenhower was the first president to send American servicemen to Vietnam. In the early 1950s, he sent a handful of U.S. “military advisors” there to aid France in its unsuccessful effort to keep Vietnam as a colony.

After the French were ousted and Vietnam was split into South and North Vietnam in 1954, Eisenhower sent more “military advisors” to help support Ngo Dinh Diem’s fledgling government in South Vietnam. But the numbers were still relatively small; from 750 to 1,500 U.S. servicemen between 1955 and 1960.

When Kennedy became president, he took more significant steps toward getting the U.S. entangled in what we now call the Vietnam War.

In 1961, he sent 3,200 American “military advisors” to South Vietnam. He increased that number in 1962. By the time of his assassination on November 22, 1963, Kennedy had sent a total of more than 16,000 U.S. servicemen to Vietnam and more than 100 had been killed.

Kennedy’s successor Lyndon Baines Johnson dramatically escalated U.S. involvement in Vietnam. By 1968, LBJ had committed more than half a million US troops to the war.

When Richard M. Nixon became president in 1969, he began to withdraw American troops, pushed the South Vietnamese government to increasingly fight the war on its own and entered fruitless peace negotiations with the North Vietnamese.

Nixon resigned in 1974 in the wake of the Watergate scandal and Gerald Ford became president. By that time there were only a small number of American troops left in Vietnam. Most were there primarily to guard the U.S. embassy in Saigon.

Saigon fell to the North Vietnamese on April 30, 1975, bringing the Vietnam War to an ignominious end.

More than 58,000 American servicemen and women were killed during the course of the war.

Somewhere between 1 and 3 million North and South Vietnamese men, women and children were killed.

Ultimately, all of those deaths did not prevent Communists from controlling South Vietnam. Today, nobody in the U.S. seems to care that Vietnam is a Communist state.

Life, as President Kennedy noted, is unfair.

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     * 

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Op-Ed: When Life Is Unfair

SED’s Bernice Lerner on what grads should know

In this season of endings and beginnings, accomplished individuals offer their wisdom to our nation’s graduates. They highlight unique attributes of this generation and the special challenges they face. They speak of matters of global concern. And at some institutions of higher education, an author, prize-winner, or statesman might awaken in young people the desire to serve, or to express their creativity, or to hone their senses of humility and awe.

I have not, however, heard a speech that focuses on this inevitability: life being unfair.

There is the ineffable injustice of being caught at the wrong place and time in history, such as a war or a natural disaster. There is the injustice of terrible events, such as having to deal with a debilitating illness or the loss of a loved one. And for those of us who are more blessed, there are less earth-shattering injustices, such as being covertly discriminated against, defrauded, or downsized out of a job. Such as having to deal with unreasonable demands on our time and energies or being denied what one is qualified for or entitled to. There is no limit to the docket of injustices that could be brought before cosmic small claims courts. And few among us, no matter how privileged or successful, escape some such instance in any decade of our lives.

Privileged to be studying and writing about lives, I know intimately how good, hardworking individuals, caring and altruistic people, and talented and consummate professionals have had, through no fault of their own, to surmount boulders dumped on their career paths or to face doors slammed shut. How they have been asked to do what their consciences would not allow.

How can those who deliver messages to graduates prepare them for this cold, cruel world? Perhaps by acknowledging that nature has already taken its course. Twenty-two or so years of life, both in and beyond school, offer plenty of opportunity for practice with unjust situations. An insensitive teacher dismisses a question; a classmate fails to do her part in a group project; a coach displays favoritism in managing the team; a friend betrays a confidence. To the extent that young people have learned to choose well from a range of responses to such situations, they have attained measures of a moral education. To the extent they have learned to anticipate and plan for the possibility of things gone awry, without being fearful, they display good judgment.

I envision a graduation speaker putting before young people historical or literary examples and exemplars, inspiring good judgment. Take the biblical Joseph, whose brilliance was evident not only in his predicting that famine would befall Egypt, but also in his proposing to Pharoah, and executing, a strategy to prevent it from having devastating effects. We need to conceive appropriate contingency plans. Though we cannot prepare for every situation, it is prudent to save, expand one’s network of friends, and have an updated résumé at the ready.

Beyond readying oneself, just responses to injustice may be outrage, acceptance, counting blessings (or “reframing”), or redoubling one’s efforts toward some hopefully achievable goal. A combination of responses may also be in order.

How to choose wisely from the range of options and their infinite permutations? By paying attention to what we feel and striving to display these feelings in the most excellent way, according to Aristotle. How can we locate this way? By realizing that it exists somewhere between two extremes: one of defect and one of excess. A person of fine character will neither underreact nor overreact, but will respond with decency to particular circumstances. He will know how he is temperamentally inclined to respond, and in trying to “get it right,” consciously lean toward the opposite tendency. He might ask what the most judicious person he knows would do in the same situation. And he will aim toward producing the least pernicious outcome.

When there is no time to reflect, we will respond to injustice in our usual way. This is why it is crucial for young people to develop good habits of heart and mind, i.e., to practice dealing constructively with the unfairness to which they are subjected. This may mean striving toward positive goals, directing attention to the disadvantaged or the needy, speaking out against discriminatory practices, or lobbying for a noble cause. Given their natural tendencies, given the situations in which they find themselves, young adults will thus be equipped to deal with the inevitable.

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• Speech about Life for Students and Children

Speech about Life

Good morning one and all present here. I am standing before you all to share my thoughts through my speech about life. Life is a continuous ongoing process that has to end someday. Life is all about adoring yourself, creating yourself. A quote for you that life can be only understood backward but it must be lived forwards. Life itself is a golden opportunity to live a meaningful life and support others to do so. It doesn’t matter how many years you live. But it matters how well you live a quality life.

Source: pixabay.com

The fear of death always threatens our lives. Every person has to face death sooner or later, but that doesn’t mean that it should discourage us from living life to the fullest or achieving our goals. A person is wise only when he/she is ready to meet destiny when it comes, but until that time enjoys every bit of it. It is a sense of readiness. It is a journey in everyone’s life wherein we have to cross the bridge of death to be able to wake up to a life eternal.

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Human life – A very Precious Gift

Human life is truly a very precious gift. Each moment of human life carries us an opportunity, to act to develop and express our virtues. Every moment unlocks the path to us to receive blessings. This is the truth that life gives us both positive and negative situations. What is really important is how we react.

Life is the gift of God in the form of trust that we will make it meaningful in whatever we can. We are all unique individuals. No one is born like you and no one will ever be, so cherish your individuality. Many times, I come across people accusing God of things that they don’t have. They always cursing their lives. But, do they realize that this life itself is precious? If we make it worth living and work hard towards positivity.

Life is a Journey, not a Destination

Life is nothing but a journey with lessons, hardships, heartache and special moments. It will ultimately lead us to our destination, our purpose in life. The road will not always be a plane; in fact, throughout our travels, we will face many challenges.

These challenges will always test our courage, strengths, weaknesses, and faith. Along our way, we may encounter obstacles that will come between the paths and we are destined to take.

In order to be on the right path, we must overcome these obstacles. Sometimes these obstacles are really blessings in disguise, only we don’t understand that at the time. The secret of life is best known to those who are not attached to anything deeply so much.

Therefore, they remain out of touch with worries and shifting fortunes of their lives. They are the people who do not measure their lives in terms of materialistic possessions, but by measuring their lives in terms of people they cannot live without.

Lastly, I will conclude that we should make life worthwhile. It should be with the love of our family and friends that life can be made beautiful. Life can be more beautiful and purposeful by discharging our duties in our family, at work, society and the world at large.

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How Hidden Nazi Symbols Were the Tip of a Toxic Iceberg at Life Is Strange Developer Deck Nine

Inside the developer of life is strange's internal struggles with toxicity, hate speech, crunch, and more..

Early last year, while working on the next entry in the Life Is Strange franchise, a few developers at Deck Nine stumbled upon something that didn’t belong in their game: Nazi symbols.

Initially, developers noticed a reference to the number 88 , and flagged the issue to their bosses assuming it was an innocent mistake. But in the ensuing weeks, others found more problematic signs and in-universe labels, such as references to a racist meme , the number 18 , and the Hagal rune . As the number of possible hate symbols mounted, staff grew increasingly concerned that someone was putting these items in their game deliberately as a dog whistle to white supremacists.

Nazi imagery would be inappropriate in most games, but in a Life Is Strange title the dissonance was especially frightening. Since its inception, the series has been lauded for thoughtful portrayals of marginalized individuals. Its most recent entry, Life Is Strange: True Colors, won Games for Impact at The Game Awards in 2021 and a GLAAD Media Award for Outstanding Video Game. With such a reputation, developers tell me, there was an expectation that any whiff of hate speech would be immediately removed and thoroughly investigated.

But as weeks went by, management remained silent and staff unrest grew. This wasn’t the first time executives had failed to act when marginalized individuals at the studio felt unsafe. According to over a dozen current and former employees across several departments, most of whom spoke to me on condition of anonymity for fear of reprisal, Deck Nine’s management has long let a toxic work culture fester at the studio. They claim the C-suite has protected multiple abusive leaders, encouraged crunch, and allowed bullying of individuals advocating internally for more authentic representation in Life Is Strange.

Now on the cusp of announcing its next game and struggling to secure other projects, Deck Nine leadership is facing growing internal discontent from those harmed by its inaction. While the developers of Life Is Strange love and believe in the series, many of them increasingly struggle to reconcile the values the games promote with the culture in which they are made.

Deck Nine Games was founded under the name Idol Minds in 1997 and for most of its history, worked on games very different from Life Is Strange. For a long time it focused on PlayStation games such as Cool Boarders 3 and 4, Rally Cross 2, and Neopets: The Darkest Faerie. Idol Minds also assisted on multiple Ratchet & Clank games. The studio briefly pivoted to mobile game development in the early 2010s before vanishing for a few years, reemerging as Deck Nine in 2017.

This wasn’t just a name change. Equipped with proprietary toolset StoryForge, Deck Nine announced it would focus on narrative games, beginning with the Square Enix-owned Life Is Strange. Deck Nine first took the reins from series creator Dontnod Entertainment on a prequel, Life Is Strange: Before the Storm. Though Dontnod followed up with Life Is Strange 2 in 2018, it officially left the series behind after that , making Deck Nine the logical successor with Life Is Strange: True Colors in 2021 and the Life Is Strange Remastered Collection in 2022.

Deck Nine’s first crack at Square Enix’s popular narrative series involved significant crunch, and while efforts were made to improve workloads on True Colors, overtime never fully vanished. One anonymous individual told me they worked 70 to 80 hours a week for an entire month straight on True Colors. Another described taking on weeks of crunch to protect other team members, saying it was “never mandated” but that there was always too much to get done in the allotted time.

Much of the crunch, developers say, was the direct result of the relationship between Deck Nine and Square Enix. Several people told me it felt as though Square Enix had sold Life Is Strange to the lowest bidder, and that this was frequently reflected in production schedules with tight deadlines and small budgets. Multiple people were aware of producers being forced by their bosses and Square Enix to rework production schedules so it looked like every milestone fit within a very limited development time frame, despite their arguments that it was impossible. One called Square Enix – and specifically, Square Enix London, who Deck Nine worked with directly - “bullies.”

Another source elaborated, “Square always put a lot of pressure on our people, so that toxicity started to bleed into our environment too.”

Others I spoke to expressed frustration at Square Enix for a different reason: it was far too hands-on with the script. Sure, Life is Strange is a Square Enix’s owned IP, but sources told me Square Enix seemed oddly reluctant or outright hostile to the diverse themes and ideas that Life Is Strange fans love. For instance, multiple people recalled an incident during True Colors development where Square Enix told multiple developers it didn’t want Life Is Strange to be thought of as the “gay game.”

“There’s a lot of press out there praising True Colors for having the first bisexual lead in a Life Is Strange game,” said Mallory Littleton, a narrative designer who worked at Deck Nine on multiple Life Is Strange titles. “Even in our press guides from Square Enix, all the way up until [review copies were out], we were not to say anything about Alex’s sexuality, period, at all. And then they did the advance copies, and all of these reviews came out saying how amazing it was to finally see an explicitly bi protagonist, and after that, Square was like, just kidding, Alex is absolutely, canonically, 100% bisexual.”

Square Enix declined to comment for this article, but instead pointed IGN to Deck Nine’s response, which we’ve included in full at the end of this article.

Fraught as the relationship with Square Enix was, some people I spoke to at Deck Nine laid the blame for the difficult relationship not at the feet of the publisher, but Deck Nine management. They said that managers at Deck Nine never seemed willing to ask Square Enix for more time or push back on notes the developers disagreed with. How, then, was Square Enix even supposed to know the studio was struggling?

Multiple sources gave the impression in our conversations that Deck Nine’s relationship with Square Enix for Life Is Strange was largely one of convenience rather than any deep appreciation for the series. Square Enix liked that Deck Nine was willing to do the game for a lower budget than other studios, and it had the StoryForge tool, which was made for narrative adventure games. Deck Nine, for its part, needed a good IP to pair with StoryForge. Telltale already had rights to many of the most appealing ones, and other large licenses weren’t willing to work with an untested studio. However, many developers told me Deck Nine management seemed unprepared for dealing with a game with “serious” themes, especially when it comes to thoughtful portrayals of diverse individuals.

Screens - Life is Strange: True Colors

Alongside complaints of low pay, difficulty getting promotions, and the aforementioned crunch, many people I spoke to expressed frustration that management allowed numerous instances of toxic behavior to go unaddressed for months on end. These included a number of specific accounts of sexual harassment, bullying, transphobia, and otherwise toxic work culture that multiple individuals corroborated. In just one example, multiple people remembered a senior programmer who frequently made sexist remarks and crude “jokes” with both racial and sexual overtones. One person recalled him repeatedly harassing a young, female producer, frequently speaking over her, invading her personal space, and blocking her from grabbing items. He also frequently screamed and swore at other junior programmers sitting near him. One anonymous source with insight into leadership decisions recalled management fighting to keep the programmer despite numerous reports, opting to move his team to desks far away from other departments so others couldn’t hear him yelling. He was eventually let go, not long after an incident where sources recalled overhearing him screaming at an HR representative.

Every woman I spoke to for this piece had at least one story of being treated poorly or harassed during her time there, and almost all said they felt they had to fight exceptionally hard to receive raises or promotions. “We’re usually treated as a marketing or PR asset, that’s how higher ups often talked about us,” said Madeleine Tate, a former producer at Deck Nine on Life Is Strange. “Every promotion where a woman got promoted took a team effort, everyone suggesting them, sending emails, both men and women, dozens just trying to get them promoted.”

While Deck Nine’s myriad issues impacted a number of departments and teams at the studio, the narrative team was particularly impacted. Consistently one of the most diverse teams in the studio, those I spoke to within and outside of the narrative team recalled the group dealing with sexism, harassment, bullying, transphobia, microaggressions, alienation, and other toxic behavior from those outside the department. But while these broader issues pervaded the day-to-day of the team’s work, sources say narrative faced internal conflict as well largely centered on its leader: narrative director and eventual Deck Nine CCO Zak Garriss.

Garriss joined Deck Nine in 2016 as the narrative director for Before the Storm. He is said to have quickly endeared himself to Deck Nine’s executives with his charisma, pitching abilities, and rare willingness to successfully disagree with Square Enix. But elsewhere in the studio, Garriss cultivated a different reputation. As Deck Nine began work on True Colors, sources say Garriss began forming close relationships with a number of younger women, often in situations where he had some sort of mentorship or other power over them, including at least one of the women on his team. Multiple women described him as “love bombing” them when they first met, showering them with compliments and convincing them he could get them promotions or raises. Sources say he frequently stayed late at the studio talking to these women – inviting them to lunch, dinner, drinks, movies, or even to his house after work. While in all these situations, sources say he would instigate personal conversations, and would even text some of them after work hours about personal topics.

“He would walk me to my car, I’d open the door, say goodbye, and he’d sort of linger,” Littleton recalled. “We’d keep talking, I’d sit down, and he’d linger again next to the open door. He never made a particularly overt move, it was always subtle enough. It felt like it was maybe always just a vibe that I was getting. I felt stupid, first of all, for ending up in that situation with him in the first place. But because he never clearly made a move, maybe I was just reading too much into the whole thing. It wasn’t until I explained it in great detail to others that someone clued me in.”

Multiple women who experienced this behavior from Garriss described a pervasive feeling of being unable to tell him “no” when he crossed personal boundaries due to his status at the studio. This feeling only increased over time and bled into the workplace, with several of those I spoke to reporting numerous incidents of him lashing out against those who disagreed with him at work. This was especially true of those fighting for more thoughtful, authentic, or sensitive portrayals of diverse characters. Tate, for instance, recalled being formally reprimanded for criticizing Garriss’ seeming reluctance to allow women in his scripts to express anger. Littleton recounted Garriss telling her that he didn’t think representation mattered because “he didn’t necessarily identify with every white man protagonist, and so other people shouldn’t identify with characters because they look the same.”

“At a certain point our job became finding a way to couch feedback in a way that Zak would hear, more than it was coming up with the feedback,” Littleton added.

Others recalled being reprimanded by Garriss for asking questions about the removal of a transgender character from True Colors that took place fairly deep in development. Two anonymous individuals told me that when the Deck Nine social team wanted to post something in support of Black Lives Matter, Garriss pushed back, calling BLM a hate group. In another example, multiple people told me that Garriss fought hard for a twist on True Colors’ final choice that a number of writers pointed out included a problematic portrayal of migrant workers and needed to be changed (it eventually was). And several sources recalled a meeting in which Garriss told those who had pushed back on this decision that they were getting too hung up on “political ideologies” and asked everyone present to go around the room and list their political affiliations.

Many people told me about a scene Garriss wrote for True Colors that the writers felt they had to fight him excessively hard to change. In the final script of True Colors, the main character Alex is taken into the woods by Jed, who she thinks is a friend. He betrays her, shooting her and missing, causing her to fall into an abandoned mine shaft. However, in Garriss’ original version, Jed spikes her drink at a bar and takes her out to the woods for an attempted murder. When they saw this version of the scene, a number of people pushed back, arguing that the scene would unintentionally trigger associations with date rape. Multiple individuals, including a number of women, recalled having to fight extensively with Garriss about this scene before it was eventually changed.

“It took a three hour meeting in the writers room and one of the writers sharing an extremely personal story to get Zak to agree to get the content out,” said Littleton. “It wasn’t about us not wanting to have difficult topics in there, but Life Is Strange shines because that type of content is chosen extremely deliberately and it’s given runway, it’s given space to breathe. This detail is irrelevant to the plot, it would have been traumatic for players, and there was no space to unpack it. We don’t have time to talk about what it means for Alex to be roofied by a man she trusted.”

She added that once Garriss finally agreed to take the detail out, he “went on a long tangent about how the writers need to be creatively brave enough to go to ugly places for the sake of our art.” Another anonymous source recalled Garriss suggesting that this pushback was only occurring because he was making a game about a woman, and that he wouldn’t have to deal with this if he was making a game about Nathan Drake.

“All the stuff people have praised in the queer community [about True Colors] was hard fought for,” Tate said. “[Garriss] had senior, queer people on his writing team that he refused to trust. The theme of the game is empathy, the power is empathy, but he didn’t really have any of his own. He would talk about how he felt so empathetic to people, but he genuinely seemed so repelled by any experience he couldn’t personally identify with…If someone talked about their lived experience as a marginalized individual, his response was always ‘Is that true?’”

Tate told me she went to HR repeatedly about Garriss’ behavior during his time there, but was simply encouraged to try and see things from his point of view. Another source, closer to leadership, was aware that Garriss had been instructed by HR to stop taking young women out to dinners; he did not. However, those I spoke to say that as True Colors wore on, Garriss distanced himself from his team of writers. He and another lead would make most of the story decisions, rewriting work from other writers without allowing them the opportunity to give feedback, even on stories centering marginalized characters.

Toward the end of True Colors, Deck Nine implemented a new, anonymous performance evaluation tool. As a result, a number of people told me they finally felt comfortable being honest with management about Garriss’ issues. But management, they say, did not take action. Some time later, Garriss quit voluntarily. But this wasn’t the end. True Colors launched to critical acclaim, and in the wake of its success, Deck Nine was preparing to expand its portfolio. But it was struggling with one story pitch in particular, and Deck Nine’s leadership pitched bringing Garriss back to fix it.

Once news got out, the narrative team erupted. Multiple people begged management not to bring back Garriss in a series of meetings, messages, and emails. One person familiar with leadership at the company recalls HR stepping in, noting that management was actively underpaying a number of workers, especially women, while considering a massive salary for Garriss. HR allegedly suggested that Deck Nine could be legally liable for Garriss’ behavior if they invited him back after the bevy of reports. When the company CEO and CFO persisted in arguing that they needed Garriss, multiple writers handed in resignations. Finally, management relented. Garriss did not return.

At least, not officially. Following his departure, Garriss landed at Telltale Games, which was working at the time on a project in close writing partnership with Deck Nine. Only a few months after his departure, several of those who had protested Garriss’ return were told that a few narrative team members had been holding story breaking sessions at Garriss’ home.

The Expanse: A Telltale Series Screenshots

In a statement to IGN, Telltale Games asserts it was “not aware of any concerns about Zak prior to his hire” and declines to comment on internal Deck Nine issues. It also notes that due to the move to remote and hybrid work during the COVID-19 pandemic, it has become “common” for employees to meet at one another’s homes. The company adds:

“We can say that, during his time at Telltale, Zak was one of the most talented, balanced and inclusive game directors we have ever worked with, and that is evident in the games he has delivered.”

In response to a request for comment on this piece, Garriss pushed back on a number of the allegations above. Though he acknowledged having “mentored” many women, he says he also mentored many men, and never directly offered promotion but instead supported the existing promotion process. He says the team at Deck Nine was “very close” and often attended lunches, dinners, drinks, movies, and other engagements together, and that he hosted get-togethers at his home “a small number of times” “with both male and female devs” and that his 73-year-old mother who lives with him was always present. He added that he never engaged in “any aberrant or inappropriate behavior” in texting his coworkers and that “many of the devs in the studios…text often, about all manner of things.”

Garris went on to claim that the narrative team on True Colors was “initially characterized by torpor rather than toxicity” due to “a smaller portion of the group not collaborating well.” He said, “In all of my career, I have never worked with writers who were as creatively inflexible, antagonistic toward difference, or less inclined to listen or compromise as a select few of this group.” Garriss claims that the work on True Colors prior to his presence on the team was “so poor, the game was under real threat of cancellation when I returned,” and that at a certain point he chose to reduce the “influence” of certain members. He claims that as a result, “Their conduct became unprofessional, more antagonistic, and accusatory toward me of the toxicity that, from the perspective of many people in the studio, was in actuality a result of their behavior.”

Garriss additionally said he does not recall referring to Black Lives Matter as a “hate group,” and says he “made every effort to handle the discussions” around the exclusion of a trans character from True Colors “with kindness and care.” He denies that the rejected story angle in True Colors’ ending regarding migrant workers was a harmful one, and says the team was “divided” on the issue of Alex being drugged by Jed and that he opted to change the point “because of the passion and the earnestness of their case.”

Finally, Garriss alleges that the number of complaints against him in 360 evaluations was “not significant” and that “the majority of the feedback on me personally was positive.” He also reiterates Telltale’s statement that meeting at people’s homes is “quite common” on certain teams given the nature of remote work.

He concludes as follows:

“If you are looking for clarity around the views of Deck Nine – the studio and its leadership, myself included – look to the content the team created as a reflection of the intentions and beliefs of that team. No game is perfect, and no production is ever easy. Before the Storm and True Colors were very difficult. But earnest hearts working tirelessly for years prevailed in the production of those games, and I am proud of what the team produced, grateful for the chance to have been a part of it, and honored to have touched the lives we have with the content we created; please do not let the biased viewpoint of a select few blind you to the truth of the whole.”

In the wake of Garriss’ departure, many of those who had worked closely with him told me that they felt optimism about the future of their work. As Littleton put it, the team hoped they could work to build Deck Nine into a “home for people like us.”

“Queer or trans or women of color or just writers of color, folks who are not typically comfortable, able to be at home in the games industry just because of the way that it is,” she continued. “Zak left, we managed to reshape the story into something that we liked and cared about and really, genuinely believe in. I think our upcoming game is a really good game, and we built this incredible, diverse team of writers who are very, very good at their jobs, but on top of that extremely good to one another. It was such a supportive, open, honest place to work.

“And then everything hit the fan, one thing after another.”

Near the end of 2022, as management was fighting to bring back Garriss, someone noticed something odd in the in-development new Life Is Strange game. It was an in-game sign that incorporated the word “Sheeeit” in what seemed to be a reference a racist meme . The individual flagged the asset as problematic, and was reassured at the time that it would be changed.

But the meme soon surfaced again. A few months later, another person saw the same scene and noticed a problem with a different asset: the number 88, which is widely used as a hate symbol referencing Hitler . This person flagged the issue to their superiors, presuming it was accidental. But as word spread around the studio and more people looked at the scene, even more symbols were found. These included (among potential others) the number 18 , an apparent Hagal rune – widely used in Nazi Germany to signify devotion to Nazi philosophy – and the same apparent racist meme reference before, albeit shortened to “Sheee.” Developers flagged these to various team leads and managers, and received reassurances that it would be looked into. But weeks turned into months, and the assets remained unchanged. By the end of June, employees had been told an HR investigation was ongoing, but had received no other feedback.

Meanwhile, concerned staff were forced to contend with the notion that a coworker was using Life Is Strange to promote hate speech. Multiple people told me that while they could easily believe someone might accidentally and innocently use the number 88 or 18 without knowing what it meant, the sheer number of racist and Nazi items in that one room made it difficult to believe it was all just a big coincidence.

“I have tried to hold space for the idea that one person made a bunch of extremely unfortunate coincidences,” said Elizabeth Ballou, a former narrative designer at Deck Nine, when I approached her about the content. “It is really hard for me to believe that. Especially because we asked them to remove the sheeit meme, and they kept it on there but smaller. So either this was a case of the worst miscommunication known to mankind…or Occam’s Razor, simplest explanation is that someone was trying to see how many of these things they could get away with before someone noticed.”

One anonymous person pointed out that given the particular fanbase Life Is Strange served, having imagery like this seemed like a recipe for certain disaster.

“To put that in this game in particular feels targeted,” they said. “It feels like a way to say, ‘You don’t get to have this either.’...It’s not a little thing. If you meant it as a joke, it doesn’t matter. It reads the same.”

Finally at the end of August, after numerous reports of the hate speech, management finally addressed the assets. In a message posted in Slack, CEO Mark Lyons informed staff that it had removed the symbols and investigated how they came to be there. Lyons claimed that following the investigation, management determined that this was “not an intentional action.”

“Regardless of intent, we will not tolerate any form of hate speech in the games. It doesn’t matter if we accidentally put such symbols in the game, unaware of their meaning, if some segment of our audience perceive them to be espousing hate speech.”

In response, Lyons announced the company would be instituting an anti-hate speech policy, an internal page outlining what such symbols entail, communicating a process for investigating future instances of hate speech, and creating a mandatory annual training course to raise awareness of hate speech with the goal of preventing it from appearing in games.

The message was met with mixed responses, with some employees asking for more information, some expressing gratitude, and others appearing defensive or even mocking. One person suggested that everyone reacting to the original post with the “100” emoji (which typically signifies agreement, as in 100%) should “receive written warnings for their racism,” referencing this .

Other employees felt deeply uncomfortable with how the whole situation had played out: the length of time and the amount of complaints it took for management to take action, the lack of transparency around the investigation, and the response of some of their coworkers to management’s message. Several individuals I spoke to said they tried to communicate with leadership after the fact to gain more information, but that while management heard their concerns, Lyons in particular just seemed…confused.

“Our CEO seemed taken aback in that he had never considered this, that people might feel unsafe, that someone would intentionally put this stuff in a game,” one person said. “I don’t know what year you’re living in, but people do this kind of stuff all the time.”

Another individual suggested that leadership seemed sheltered and unprepared for the difficult conversations that a series like Life Is Strange prompted. “You’re not going to learn this stuff overnight, but at least show more aptitude toward having these conversations and giving space to people to let them tell you,” they said. “They’re more reactive than proactive. They’re not going to be proactive in looking for these things until we hold their hand to the fire.”

Weeks later, Lyons announced that Deck Nine would be investigating the incident further, saying that Deck Nine was not equipped to do so on its own. Deck Nine claims to have hired Denver-based firm Investigations Law Group to look into the situation -- as of the publication of this piece, no further information has been given to employees about the investigation, what it entailed, or its results. Additionally, current employees say none of Lyons’ promises of anti-hate speech policies, training, or processes have yet been implemented.

While all this was taking place, Deck Nine was being rocked in other ways. In spring 2023, the studio underwent two rounds of job cuts. The first was smaller, impacting a single-digit number of individuals. And in May, Skybound Entertainment canceled a deal with the studio to work on a sequel to Telltale’s The Walking Dead (Skybound declined to comment for this piece). Roughly 30 people across all Deck Nine projects lost their jobs, reducing the studio to around 100 people. Team leads were told to choose who to cut, a move that resulted in Littleton and a fellow narrative lead volunteering to lay themselves off to save two of their coworkers (a third member of narrative was also laid off involuntarily).

With her remaining weeks at the company, Littleton recalls having to “haul ass” and to “write more and write faster than we had the entire project” to ensure the remainder of the Life Is Strange team was set up for success moving forward. “It’s difficult to describe the mental and emotional toll it took to crunch when you know you’ve already been laid off.”

Then, not long after, there was another blow, this time at Telltale Games. Deck Nine had been working on a pre-production script for The Wolf Among Us 2. But Telltale was having its own money issues, and eventually pulled the funding from Deck Nine. Telltale itself underwent its own layoffs , and Deck Nine found itself down two major projects and a lot of necessary funding. In a statement to IGN, Telltale Games says that The Wolf Among Us 2 “remains in production internally at Telltale. We value our relationship with Deck Nine and continue to explore ways we can work together."

The cancellation of two major projects and multiple rounds of layoffs have not inspired confidence internally. Among those I spoke to, there was a strong perception that Deck Nine leaders were bad dealmakers who were unwilling or unable to advocate for their studio to get resources even when their deals were successful. Just this past February, Deck Nine experienced yet another round of layoffs, with management citing an inability to sign a new project after the loss of both The Wolf Among Us 2 and The Walking Dead. A total of 23 individuals were impacted, leaving Deck Nine at just over half the size it was a few years ago during the height of True Colors. Leadership took pay cuts, but impacted staff only received two weeks of severance pay regardless of time served at the studio.

This leaves those remaining at Deck Nine once again reliant on Life Is Strange. For now, sources says development on the current project is progressing well despite some early struggles. For better or worse, Deck Nine has become the steward of Life Is Strange, and their fates are inextricably linked. In order for the studio to survive, developers say studio leadership needs to rebuild trust, especially from the developers advocating for the diverse and empathetic stories that have been a beloved hallmark of Life Is Strange since its inception.

“I worry that True Colors and Before the Storm are important to the queer community, and I just worry people will think they can’t play these anymore,” Tate said. “But every good thing we got in those stories was fought for hard by female writers and queer writers, and games aren’t made by one person…If you’re marginalized you have to love games so much more to make them because you have to put up with so much more shit.”

Rebekah Valentine is a senior reporter for IGN. Got a story tip? Send it to [email protected].

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Opinion How AI could transform baseball forever

Once you declare something the best, there’s not much more that needs to be said. So I’ll keep my praise for Michael Lewis’s 2003 “ Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair Game ” brief. It’s the best nonfiction book I’ve ever read, and on the short list of the most impactful. Until “Moneyball” revealed how Oakland A’s general manager Billy Beane used statistical analysis to beat richer, dumber opponents, baseball was the realm of witch doctors. A’s first baseman Scott Hatteberg told Lewis that his previous team, the Boston Red Sox, brought in motivational speakers to awaken their hitters’ mystical sides. One delivered a lecture on the virtues of the thymus gland. “You were supposed to bang your chest before you hit,” Hatteberg said, “to release all this untapped energy and aggression.”

As a new season begins, the victory of stats over the thymus gland is so complete that there are few analytical mountains left to climb. Every team in every major sport employs mathematicians and engineers to find a strategic edge that keeps shrinking because of all the other mathematicians and engineers doing the exact same thing. The Tampa Bay Rays put a uniformed analytics coach in the dugout. Some teams have better data science and player performance models than others, but “Moneyball” demonstrated the insanity of competing against probability with intuition. It bounced all the schmucks out of the casino.

You’d think this would lead to the book’s gradual obsolescence, but for the sports-obsessed, super-nerd segment of its readership — my people! — “Moneyball” is no longer tethered to its binding. It’s a belief system, and like feminism and existentialism it’s going through a second wave, fueled in part by artificial intelligence.

This second wave has multiple progenitors, but we’ll focus on the least likely. Kyle Boddy was a restless junior software engineer bouncing from Microsoft to PokerStars when he read “Moneyball,” got radicalized and started a baseball blog called “Driveline Mechanics.” In 2007, he created Driveline Baseball , a physical lab where he could test his theories. This sounds ambitious, but the first Driveline was in a Seattle basement under an aikido studio next to a strip club that was adjacent to an RV park. “To be clear, I lived in an apartment next to the RV park, not the RV park itself,” says Boddy. “I know you’re doing journalism here.”

It was from this modest perch that Boddy met Trevor Bauer, a brilliant young pitcher with all of four big league appearances for the Arizona Diamondbacks on his resume. Bauer had also read “Moneyball,” and his devotion to analytics and self-improvement led him to buy a brand new $8,000 Edgertronic camera. (Bauer is now baseball’s most deserving pariah .) “It was actually Trevor’s dad who said, ‘If I show you this camera, you’re gonna want one right away,’” says Boddy. “I was like, ‘Yeah, sure.’”

The Edgertronic slows the normal blur of a pitching or hitting motion down by shooting thousands of frames per second, providing perfect clarity, even in close-up. After just a few frames of footage, Boddy realized that a 150-year-old mystery of physics — the impact of tiny variations in finger placement on a baseball’s seams, or the angle of a bat as it meets the ball — was winking at him, asking to be solved. “All I’d done my whole life to that point is find underground technologies and use them in ways that people don’t expect,” says Boddy. “And now here’s this source of optical information that was never available or affordable before. I figured if I can’t use this thing, then I need to go back and work for f---ing Microsoft.”

Boddy immediately bought an Edgertronic on eBay. He also had a crucial insight about how to use it. Camera data could help players experiment with new pitch grips and refine their swings, and the avalanche of statistical data could confirm the outcomes. But to revolutionize player performance — to get athletes to really understand what they needed to do — the two had to converge in simple and elegant software. And the means of that convergence was artificial intelligence.

I’ve spoken to a lot of people about AI, and there’s an awkward point in almost every conversation where we both admit we don’t know exactly what AI is. In fairness, it can be a lot of things. There’s no fixed definition . But people are pretty assertive about the money they expect to make from it, and I’m an AI columnist, so it’d be nice not to have to talk about the benefits of this technology in the vague way people talk about, I dunno, Herbalife?

All of which is to say, Boddy has the most practical definition of AI I’ve heard. “It’s the best translator ever,” he says. “In the literal sense, we communicate with our athletes in Japanese and Korean and Spanish with a ChatGPT plug-in that translates baseball slang flawlessly in real time. But from a technology perspective — poring over code bases, switching between PHP or Python, none of that matters anymore. … AI takes totally different code or data or insights and harmonizes it. Numbers become words. Words can become images. Everything can talk to everything.”

Boddy and his engineering team now rely on AI to blend dozens of data streams to create customized coaching regimens. I cannot emphasize enough how little this is like your weekly personal training session. Video analysis breaks down individual muscles and movements by the inch. Hardware (bats and balls) is equipped with software (sensors) that tracks every baseball action and renders them into equations that measure force and torque. Like all data-gobbling AI software, the process gets smarter as it goes; Driveline has collected enough historical performance data that it can correlate five non-baseball related physical tests into dead solid predictions of fastball velocity and bat speed.

Even in its infancy, Driveline helped Bauer become one of baseball’s best pitchers. But Bauer arrived at Driveline as a known prospect, with talent so obvious that he got a $3.4 million amateur signing bonus. More impressive was Driveline’s ability to take soft-throwing Los Angeles Dodger Tony Gonsolin ( $2,500 signing bonus) and, through pitch design and muscle development and endless cycles of analysis and Gonsolin’s own hard work, help him emerge as an all-star.

Driveline has now worked with thousands of pros and more than 40 all-stars. Regardless of their backgrounds or countries of origin, Boddy has noticed that the new arrivals are way more savvy than the players Lewis profiled in “Moneyball.” Because they’ve all read “Moneyball.” Or at least seen the movie. They grew up fluent in analytics and Edgertronics, and they understand that baseball is both a game and a market in which they are counterparties. The projection algorithms used by teams on the demand side value velocity and power, so the guys on the supply side go to Driveline to help them throw faster and hit harder. Which then gets them paid more. The market is aligned.

If this compromises the romance of the game for you, now would be a good time to stop reading and cue up the James Earl Jones speech from “Field of Dreams.” Because where things get really calculating — and relevant to any person who works for a living in the age of AI — is where labor and management diverge.

Most teams now have the same tech as Driveline. The big leagues have poached more than 40 Driveline alums to work in-house, and Boddy is a special adviser to the Red Sox. So why would a player spend their own money and travel to an inconvenient location to work on their game? Privacy. If your employer has kinesiologic data revealing how you suddenly got better at your job, they also know the circumstances in which you could suddenly get worse. Or how to optimally train your replacement. Last year’s average MLB player salary was $4.5 million ; it makes a lot of sense to pay Driveline $20,000 in training fees and keep your data to yourself. The math probably isn’t as compelling in your job. But if you think a version of this tango isn’t headed for your profession, I’ve got some thymus oil to sell you.

The more human performance improves through AI-driven data, the more important it’ll be to establish ownership of that data. Players, mere pawns in Beane’s “Moneyball” chess game, should be lauded for figuring this out fast. They even negotiated limits on how teams can use in-game data into their collective bargaining agreement. “I have friends who are lawyers and prop traders, and it’s shocking to me how far ahead sports is when it comes to these technologies,” says Boddy. “A lot of them don’t see what’s coming.” Call that the third wave.

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The Arizona Supreme Court allows a near-total abortion ban to take effect soon

Katherine Davis-Young

After the Arizona Supreme Court allowed for near-total abortion ban, a group of abortion-rights protesters gathered outside the Arizona state Capitol in Phoenix on April 9, 2024. Katherine Davis-Young/KJZZ hide caption

After the Arizona Supreme Court allowed for near-total abortion ban, a group of abortion-rights protesters gathered outside the Arizona state Capitol in Phoenix on April 9, 2024.

PHOENIX - Abortions will soon be outlawed in Arizona except in cases where a pregnant person's life is at risk. The state Supreme Court has ruled Arizona should follow a restrictive abortion law dating back to the 1860s.

Since Dec. 2022, Arizona doctors have been allowed to provide abortions up to 15 weeks into a pregnancy, based on a lower court's interpretation of state laws. But the state Supreme Court now says Arizona should follow a law banning abortions in almost all cases . It makes no exceptions for rape or incest and makes performing an abortion punishable by two to five years in prison.

Florida's abortion fight is headed to voters after court allows for a 6-week ban

In the ruling, justices wrote that they will stay enforcement for 14 days , possibly longer, allowing abortions to continue during that time. Planned Parenthood Arizona, the state's largest abortion provider, says it plans to continue providing abortions as long as allowed.

An effort is already underway to put a measure on 2024 ballots that would enshrine abortion rights in the state constitution.

Democratic President Joe Biden criticized Arizona's ban in a statement, calling on Congress to pass federal abortion protections.

"Millions of Arizonans will soon live under an even more extreme and dangerous abortion ban, which fails to protect women even when their health is at risk or in tragic cases of rape or incest," he said. "This ruling is a result of the extreme agenda of Republican elected officials who are committed to ripping away women's freedom."

Vice President Kamala Harris is scheduled to travel to Tucson on Friday for an event focusing on "reproductive freedom." It's Harris' second trip to Arizona this year to push for expanding abortion access.

Abortion across the country

The decision comes a little more than a week after the Florida Supreme Court decided to allow that state's week's 6-week ban to take effect May 1, and a day following former President Donald Trump's announcement that abortion should be left up to the states , angering some of his supporters ahead of 2024 election.

Trump declines to back nationwide abortion ban, says it should be left to the states

The U.S. Supreme Court reversed Roe v. Wade nearly two years ago and handed abortion decisions back to states resulting in a patchwork of laws across the country.

Fourteen states ban abortion with very limited exceptions , according to the Guttmacher Institute, a group that supports abortion rights. Another 15 states protect abortion rights in various ways, according to Guttmacher.

This November, there are efforts in about a dozen states, including the one in Arizona, to add a question to voters' ballots supporting abortion rights.

Correction April 9, 2024

An earlier version of this story said that Arizona would not be able to enforce the state Supreme Court decision for 45 days. In fact, enforcement is stayed for 14 days, possibly longer.