How to Write the Community Essay – Guide with Examples (2023-24)

September 6, 2023

community essay examples

Students applying to college this year will inevitably confront the community essay. In fact, most students will end up responding to several community essay prompts for different schools. For this reason, you should know more than simply how to approach the community essay as a genre. Rather, you will want to learn how to decipher the nuances of each particular prompt, in order to adapt your response appropriately. In this article, we’ll show you how to do just that, through several community essay examples. These examples will also demonstrate how to avoid cliché and make the community essay authentically and convincingly your own.

Emphasis on Community

Do keep in mind that inherent in the word “community” is the idea of multiple people. The personal statement already provides you with a chance to tell the college admissions committee about yourself as an individual. The community essay, however, suggests that you depict yourself among others. You can use this opportunity to your advantage by showing off interpersonal skills, for example. Or, perhaps you wish to relate a moment that forged important relationships. This in turn will indicate what kind of connections you’ll make in the classroom with college peers and professors.

Apart from comprising numerous people, a community can appear in many shapes and sizes. It could be as small as a volleyball team, or as large as a diaspora. It could fill a town soup kitchen, or spread across five boroughs. In fact, due to the internet, certain communities today don’t even require a physical place to congregate. Communities can form around a shared identity, shared place, shared hobby, shared ideology, or shared call to action. They can even arise due to a shared yet unforeseen circumstance.

What is the Community Essay All About?             

In a nutshell, the community essay should exhibit three things:

  • An aspect of yourself, 2. in the context of a community you belonged to, and 3. how this experience may shape your contribution to the community you’ll join in college.

It may look like a fairly simple equation: 1 + 2 = 3. However, each college will word their community essay prompt differently, so it’s important to look out for additional variables. One college may use the community essay as a way to glimpse your core values. Another may use the essay to understand how you would add to diversity on campus. Some may let you decide in which direction to take it—and there are many ways to go!

To get a better idea of how the prompts differ, let’s take a look at some real community essay prompts from the current admission cycle.

Sample 2023-2024 Community Essay Prompts

1) brown university.

“Students entering Brown often find that making their home on College Hill naturally invites reflection on where they came from. Share how an aspect of your growing up has inspired or challenged you, and what unique contributions this might allow you to make to the Brown community. (200-250 words)”

A close reading of this prompt shows that Brown puts particular emphasis on place. They do this by using the words “home,” “College Hill,” and “where they came from.” Thus, Brown invites writers to think about community through the prism of place. They also emphasize the idea of personal growth or change, through the words “inspired or challenged you.” Therefore, Brown wishes to see how the place you grew up in has affected you. And, they want to know how you in turn will affect their college community.

“NYU was founded on the belief that a student’s identity should not dictate the ability for them to access higher education. That sense of opportunity for all students, of all backgrounds, remains a part of who we are today and a critical part of what makes us a world-class university. Our community embraces diversity, in all its forms, as a cornerstone of the NYU experience.

We would like to better understand how your experiences would help us to shape and grow our diverse community. Please respond in 250 words or less.”

Here, NYU places an emphasis on students’ “identity,” “backgrounds,” and “diversity,” rather than any physical place. (For some students, place may be tied up in those ideas.) Furthermore, while NYU doesn’t ask specifically how identity has changed the essay writer, they do ask about your “experience.” Take this to mean that you can still recount a specific moment, or several moments, that work to portray your particular background. You should also try to link your story with NYU’s values of inclusivity and opportunity.

3) University of Washington

“Our families and communities often define us and our individual worlds. Community might refer to your cultural group, extended family, religious group, neighborhood or school, sports team or club, co-workers, etc. Describe the world you come from and how you, as a product of it, might add to the diversity of the UW. (300 words max) Tip: Keep in mind that the UW strives to create a community of students richly diverse in cultural backgrounds, experiences, values and viewpoints.”

UW ’s community essay prompt may look the most approachable, for they help define the idea of community. You’ll notice that most of their examples (“families,” “cultural group, extended family, religious group, neighborhood”…) place an emphasis on people. This may clue you in on their desire to see the relationships you’ve made. At the same time, UW uses the words “individual” and “richly diverse.” They, like NYU, wish to see how you fit in and stand out, in order to boost campus diversity.

Writing Your First Community Essay

Begin by picking which community essay you’ll write first. (For practical reasons, you’ll probably want to go with whichever one is due earliest.) Spend time doing a close reading of the prompt, as we’ve done above. Underline key words. Try to interpret exactly what the prompt is asking through these keywords.

Next, brainstorm. I recommend doing this on a blank piece of paper with a pencil. Across the top, make a row of headings. These might be the communities you’re a part of, or the components that make up your identity. Then, jot down descriptive words underneath in each column—whatever comes to you. These words may invoke people and experiences you had with them, feelings, moments of growth, lessons learned, values developed, etc. Now, narrow in on the idea that offers the richest material and that corresponds fully with the prompt.

Lastly, write! You’ll definitely want to describe real moments, in vivid detail. This will keep your essay original, and help you avoid cliché. However, you’ll need to summarize the experience and answer the prompt succinctly, so don’t stray too far into storytelling mode.

How To Adapt Your Community Essay

Once your first essay is complete, you’ll need to adapt it to the other colleges involving community essays on your list. Again, you’ll want to turn to the prompt for a close reading, and recognize what makes this prompt different from the last. For example, let’s say you’ve written your essay for UW about belonging to your swim team, and how the sports dynamics shaped you. Adapting that essay to Brown’s prompt could involve more of a focus on place. You may ask yourself, how was my swim team in Alaska different than the swim teams we competed against in other states?

Once you’ve adapted the content, you’ll also want to adapt the wording to mimic the prompt. For example, let’s say your UW essay states, “Thinking back to my years in the pool…” As you adapt this essay to Brown’s prompt, you may notice that Brown uses the word “reflection.” Therefore, you might change this sentence to “Reflecting back on my years in the pool…” While this change is minute, it cleverly signals to the reader that you’ve paid attention to the prompt, and are giving that school your full attention.

What to Avoid When Writing the Community Essay  

  • Avoid cliché. Some students worry that their idea is cliché, or worse, that their background or identity is cliché. However, what makes an essay cliché is not the content, but the way the content is conveyed. This is where your voice and your descriptions become essential.
  • Avoid giving too many examples. Stick to one community, and one or two anecdotes arising from that community that allow you to answer the prompt fully.
  • Don’t exaggerate or twist facts. Sometimes students feel they must make themselves sound more “diverse” than they feel they are. Luckily, diversity is not a feeling. Likewise, diversity does not simply refer to one’s heritage. If the prompt is asking about your identity or background, you can show the originality of your experiences through your actions and your thinking.

Community Essay Examples and Analysis

Brown university community essay example.

I used to hate the NYC subway. I’ve taken it since I was six, going up and down Manhattan, to and from school. By high school, it was a daily nightmare. Spending so much time underground, underneath fluorescent lighting, squashed inside a rickety, rocking train car among strangers, some of whom wanted to talk about conspiracy theories, others who had bedbugs or B.O., or who manspread across two seats, or bickered—it wore me out. The challenge of going anywhere seemed absurd. I dreaded the claustrophobia and disgruntlement.

Yet the subway also inspired my understanding of community. I will never forget the morning I saw a man, several seats away, slide out of his seat and hit the floor. The thump shocked everyone to attention. What we noticed: he appeared drunk, possibly homeless. I was digesting this when a second man got up and, through a sort of awkward embrace, heaved the first man back into his seat. The rest of us had stuck to subway social codes: don’t step out of line. Yet this second man’s silent actions spoke loudly. They said, “I care.”

That day I realized I belong to a group of strangers. What holds us together is our transience, our vulnerabilities, and a willingness to assist. This community is not perfect but one in motion, a perpetual work-in-progress. Now I make it my aim to hold others up. I plan to contribute to the Brown community by helping fellow students and strangers in moments of precariousness.    

Brown University Community Essay Example Analysis

Here the student finds an original way to write about where they come from. The subway is not their home, yet it remains integral to ideas of belonging. The student shows how a community can be built between strangers, in their responsibility toward each other. The student succeeds at incorporating key words from the prompt (“challenge,” “inspired” “Brown community,” “contribute”) into their community essay.

UW Community Essay Example

I grew up in Hawaii, a world bound by water and rich in diversity. In school we learned that this sacred land was invaded, first by Captain Cook, then by missionaries, whalers, traders, plantation owners, and the U.S. government. My parents became part of this problematic takeover when they moved here in the 90s. The first community we knew was our church congregation. At the beginning of mass, we shook hands with our neighbors. We held hands again when we sang the Lord’s Prayer. I didn’t realize our church wasn’t “normal” until our diocese was informed that we had to stop dancing hula and singing Hawaiian hymns. The order came from the Pope himself.

Eventually, I lost faith in God and organized institutions. I thought the banning of hula—an ancient and pure form of expression—seemed medieval, ignorant, and unfair, given that the Hawaiian religion had already been stamped out. I felt a lack of community and a distrust for any place in which I might find one. As a postcolonial inhabitant, I could never belong to the Hawaiian culture, no matter how much I valued it. Then, I was shocked to learn that Queen Ka’ahumanu herself had eliminated the Kapu system, a strict code of conduct in which women were inferior to men. Next went the Hawaiian religion. Queen Ka’ahumanu burned all the temples before turning to Christianity, hoping this religion would offer better opportunities for her people.

Community Essay (Continued)

I’m not sure what to make of this history. Should I view Queen Ka’ahumanu as a feminist hero, or another failure in her islands’ tragedy? Nothing is black and white about her story, but she did what she thought was beneficial to her people, regardless of tradition. From her story, I’ve learned to accept complexity. I can disagree with institutionalized religion while still believing in my neighbors. I am a product of this place and their presence. At UW, I plan to add to campus diversity through my experience, knowing that diversity comes with contradictions and complications, all of which should be approached with an open and informed mind.

UW Community Essay Example Analysis

This student also manages to weave in words from the prompt (“family,” “community,” “world,” “product of it,” “add to the diversity,” etc.). Moreover, the student picks one of the examples of community mentioned in the prompt, (namely, a religious group,) and deepens their answer by addressing the complexity inherent in the community they’ve been involved in. While the student displays an inner turmoil about their identity and participation, they find a way to show how they’d contribute to an open-minded campus through their values and intellectual rigor.

What’s Next

For more on supplemental essays and essay writing guides, check out the following articles:

  • How to Write the Why This Major Essay + Example
  • How to Write the Overcoming Challenges Essay + Example
  • How to Start a College Essay – 12 Techniques and Tips
  • College Essay

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Kaylen Baker

With a BA in Literary Studies from Middlebury College, an MFA in Fiction from Columbia University, and a Master’s in Translation from Université Paris 8 Vincennes-Saint-Denis, Kaylen has been working with students on their writing for over five years. Previously, Kaylen taught a fiction course for high school students as part of Columbia Artists/Teachers, and served as an English Language Assistant for the French National Department of Education. Kaylen is an experienced writer/translator whose work has been featured in Los Angeles Review, Hybrid, San Francisco Bay Guardian, France Today, and Honolulu Weekly, among others.

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How To Answer UC Personal Insight Prompt 7: Community

Understanding the uc admissions essay prompt.

The UC admissions essay prompt, "What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?" requires a thorough understanding in order to craft a successful essay. In this section, we will explore how to interpret the prompt, discuss why it is important, and highlight what admissions officers are looking for in your response.

Interpreting the Prompt

To effectively answer the essay prompt, it is crucial to interpret it correctly. Take the time to analyze the wording and understand the key components of the question. Consider the following points:

1- Scope: The prompt asks about your contributions to either your school or your community. You may choose to focus on one or discuss both, depending on the depth of your involvement and impact.

2- Action: The prompt specifically asks about what you have done. This means admissions officers are interested in your tangible efforts and initiatives rather than just ideas or intentions.

3- Better Place: The prompt requires you to demonstrate how your actions have made a positive difference. Consider the various ways in which you have brought about positive change, whether it is through leadership, collaboration, advocacy, or other means.

Why This Prompt is Important

The UC system places great importance on community engagement and social responsibility. By asking this prompt, the admissions committee aims to understand your commitment to making a positive impact beyond your academic achievements. They want to evaluate your character, leadership skills, and ability to contribute to the greater good.

What Admissions Officers are Looking For

When reviewing your response to this prompt, admissions officers will be looking for several key qualities and attributes:

1- Initiative: They want to see that you have taken the initiative to identify issues or needs in your school or community and have actively worked towards addressing them.

2- Impact: Admissions officers are interested in the actual impact of your actions. They want to know how your efforts have made a tangible difference and improved the lives of others.

3- Leadership and Collaboration: Demonstrating your ability to lead and collaborate with others is essential. Admissions officers want to see that you can work effectively as part of a team, inspire others, and create meaningful change together.

4- Passion and Commitment: Your essay should reflect your genuine passion and commitment to making a difference. Admissions officers want to see that you are dedicated to your cause and have a long-term vision for creating positive change.

By understanding the prompt's interpretation, recognizing its importance, and aligning your response with what admissions officers are looking for, you will be better equipped to craft a compelling and impactful essay.

How to Begin Your Essay

Crafting a strong and engaging introduction is crucial to capturing the attention of the admissions officers. In this section, we will guide you through the process of starting your essay effectively by choosing a relevant topic, creating an outline, and writing a powerful introduction.

Choosing a Relevant Topic

When selecting a topic for your essay, consider experiences or initiatives that align closely with the prompt. Reflect on your involvement in activities that have made a significant impact on your school or community. Choose a topic that allows you to showcase your passion, leadership skills, and dedication to creating positive change.

Consider the following questions to help you narrow down your topic:

  • 1. What specific projects or initiatives have you been involved in that have made a difference in your school or community?
  • 2. Have you taken on leadership roles in clubs, organizations, or community groups?
  • 3. Are there any challenges or obstacles you have faced while trying to make a positive impact? How did you overcome them?
  • 4. Have you collaborated with others to address specific issues or bring about change?

By selecting a relevant topic that highlights your unique experiences and contributions, you will be able to craft a more compelling and authentic essay.

Creating an Outline

Before diving into writing the introduction, it is essential to create a clear and structured outline. An outline will serve as a roadmap for your essay, ensuring that your thoughts and ideas flow logically and cohesively.

Consider the following components when creating your outline:

1- Introduction: Include a captivating opening sentence or hook to grab the reader's attention and provide a brief overview of your topic and its significance.

2- Background: Provide context for your involvement in making your school or community a better place. Discuss the specific issue or need you identified and explain why it is important to you.

3- Actions and Initiatives: Detail the actions you took to address the issue or contribute to positive change. Be specific and provide examples of your involvement, such as organizing events, implementing programs, or advocating for a cause.

4- Impact and Results: Discuss the tangible impact of your actions and initiatives. Highlight the positive changes that occurred as a result of your efforts and provide evidence or testimonials if available.

5- Personal Growth: Reflect on how your experiences have influenced your personal growth and development. Discuss the skills, values, or lessons you have gained from your involvement and how they have shaped your character.

6- Future Goals: Connect your contributions to your future goals and aspirations. Explain how your experiences have inspired you to continue making a difference in college and beyond.

By creating a comprehensive outline, you will have a solid foundation for your essay, making it easier to write a strong and coherent introduction.

Writing a Strong Introduction

The introduction sets the tone for your essay and should captivate the reader's attention from the very beginning. Consider the following strategies to write a powerful introduction:

1- Start with a compelling hook: Begin your essay with an attention-grabbing statement, anecdote, or question that immediately engages the reader.

2- Provide context: Briefly explain the background and significance of your topic. Help the reader understand why your involvement in making your school or community a better place is important.

3- State your thesis statement: Clearly and concisely state the main point or purpose of your essay. This will guide your reader and provide a clear focus for your essay.

4- Preview the main points: Give a brief overview of the main points you will discuss in your essay. This will provide a roadmap for the reader and set their expectations for what is to come.

Remember to revise and refine your introduction as you progress with your essay. A strong and compelling introduction will hook the reader and make them eager to continue reading your essay.

How to Elaborate on Your Contributions

Once you have established a strong introduction, it's time to delve deeper into your contributions and showcase the impact you have made in your school or community. In this section, we will guide you on how to provide specific examples, discuss the impact of your actions, and connect your contributions to your personal growth.

Providing Specific Examples

To make your essay more compelling and authentic, it is essential to provide specific examples of your contributions. Avoid general statements and instead focus on highlighting tangible actions and initiatives you have undertaken. Consider the following tips:

1- Be specific: Provide details about the projects, events, or programs you have been involved in. Describe your role, responsibilities, and the specific tasks you undertook.

2- Include numbers and data: Quantify your impact whenever possible. For example, mention the number of people you reached, the funds you raised, or the measurable improvements you achieved.

3- Share personal anecdotes: Incorporate personal stories or experiences that illustrate the significance of your contributions. This will add depth and authenticity to your essay.

4- Highlight leadership roles: If you held leadership positions, emphasize the leadership skills you utilized and the impact you had on your team or community.

By providing specific examples, you will paint a vivid picture of your involvement and demonstrate the concrete steps you have taken to make a positive difference.

Discussing the Impact of Your Actions

In addition to describing your contributions, it is crucial to discuss the impact your actions have had on your school or community. Admissions officers want to understand the tangible results of your efforts. Potential look at the following points:

1- Describe the positive changes: Explain how your actions have improved the lives of individuals or the overall well-being of your school or community. Discuss any measurable outcomes or changes you have witnessed.

2- Include testimonials or feedback: If available, incorporate testimonials from individuals who have benefited from your contributions. This will lend credibility to your achievements and showcase the real impact you have made.

3- Address challenges or obstacles: Discuss any challenges you encountered during your initiatives and how you overcame them. Admissions officers appreciate resilience and problem-solving skills, so highlighting these aspects will strengthen your essay.

Connecting Your Actions to Your Personal Growth

Beyond the impact you have had on your school or community, it is important to reflect on how your experiences have contributed to your personal growth and development. Admissions officers want to see how your involvement has shaped your character and values. Consider the following suggestions:

1- Discuss skills and qualities developed: Reflect on the skills, qualities, or values you have cultivated through your contributions. Did you develop leadership, communication, or teamwork skills? How have these experiences influenced your perspective on community engagement?

2- Highlight lessons learned: Share any valuable lessons or insights you have gained from your involvement. Discuss how these experiences have expanded your knowledge, empathy, or understanding of social issues.

3- Showcase personal growth: Explain how your contributions have transformed you as an individual. Discuss how you have become more socially aware, responsible, or committed to creating positive change.

By connecting your actions to your personal growth, you demonstrate to the admissions officers that your contributions have not only impacted the community but have also shaped you into a more compassionate and socially conscious individual.

How to Conclude Your Essay

As you approach the conclusion of your essay, it's important to leave a lasting impression on the admissions officers. In this section, we will guide you on how to effectively conclude your essay by reiterating your impact, connecting your contributions to future goals, and leaving the readers with a memorable final thought.

Reiterating Your Impact

In the conclusion, you should summarize and reiterate the impact of your contributions. Remind the readers of the positive changes you have made in your school or community. Emphasize the significance of your actions and the lasting effects they have had.

Highlight key accomplishments. Recap the most significant achievements or milestones you have reached through your initiatives. Remind the readers of the magnitude of your impact.

Revisit the numbers. If you have quantifiable data or statistics, remind the readers of the numbers to reinforce the scale of your contributions.

Reinforce the impact by sharing a personal anecdote or testimonial that illustrates the positive changes you have witnessed. This will add a human element to your conclusion.

Connecting Your Contributions to Future Goals

In addition to highlighting your past accomplishments, it is important to connect your contributions to your future goals and aspirations. Admissions officers want to see that your commitment to making a positive impact will continue in college and beyond.

Establish continuity and explain how your experiences and the lessons learned will shape your future endeavors in college. Discuss how you plan to continue making a difference and contributing to the community. For extra points, if applicable, demonstrate how your contributions align with your intended field of study. Show how your involvement has influenced your academic and career goals.

Share your vision for creating positive change in the future. Discuss how you hope to address larger societal issues or make a lasting impact in your chosen field.

Leaving a Lasting Impression

Leave a memorable final thought- end with a powerful statement. Craft a closing sentence or paragraph that leaves a lasting impact on the readers. It could be a thought-provoking question, a memorable quote, or a call to action.

Maintain a positive tone and conclude your essay on an optimistic and hopeful note. Leave the readers with a sense of inspiration and motivation to make their own contributions.

Circle back to the themes or ideas introduced in your introduction. This will create a sense of cohesion and completeness in your essay. By reiterating your impact, connecting your contributions to future goals, and leaving a memorable final thought, you will conclude your essay on a strong note, leaving a lasting impression on the admissions officers.

Revise and Edit Your Essay

Once you have completed your initial draft, it's essential to take the time to revise and edit your essay. This section will guide you through the process of reviewing for clarity and consistency, seeking feedback, and finalizing your essay to ensure it is polished and ready to make a strong impression on the admissions committee.

Reviewing for Clarity and Consistency

During the revision process, focus on enhancing the clarity and coherence of your essay. Consider the following steps:

1- Check for logical flow: Ensure that your ideas and arguments flow smoothly from one paragraph to the next. Use transitional words and phrases to create a cohesive narrative.

2- Eliminate repetition: Remove any redundant information or repetitive statements. Streamline your essay to ensure that every sentence contributes to the overall message.

3- Clarify your language: Ensure that your ideas are expressed clearly and concisely. Avoid jargon or overly complex language that may confuse the reader.

4- Check for coherence: Ensure that each paragraph and section of your essay aligns with the overall theme and purpose. Remove any tangents or unrelated information.

Getting Feedback

Seeking feedback from others can provide valuable insights and perspectives on your essay:

1- Ask for input from teachers or mentors: Share your essay with trusted teachers or mentors who can provide constructive feedback on the content, structure, and overall effectiveness.

2- Seek peer review: Share your essay with peers who can provide fresh perspectives and identify areas for improvement. Consider joining a writing group or seeking feedback from classmates.

3- Utilize online resources: Take advantage of online writing communities or platforms where you can share your essay and receive feedback from a wider audience.

Finalizing Your Essay

After receiving feedback and making necessary revisions, it's time to finalize your essay:

1- Proofread for grammar and spelling: Carefully review your essay for any grammatical errors, punctuation mistakes, or spelling errors. Use grammar-checking tools or enlist a proofreader to ensure accuracy.

2- Check formatting and word count: Ensure that your essay adheres to the required formatting guidelines and word count limits. Make any necessary adjustments to meet the requirements.

3- Read aloud: Read your essay aloud to identify any awkward phrasing, unclear sentences, or areas that need further revision. This will help you catch any lingering issues and improve the overall flow of your writing.

4- Take a break: Before submitting your essay, take a short break to gain some distance. Return to your essay with fresh eyes to make final adjustments or improvements.

By carefully revising, seeking feedback, and finalizing your essay, you will ensure that it is polished and ready to make a strong impact on the admissions committee. Remember to allocate ample time for this process to ensure that your essay is the best representation of your abilities and contributions.

Final Thoughts

The UC admissions essay is your canvas to paint a narrative of commitment, impact, and personal growth. This specific prompt seeks a genuine reflection of your contributions to the community. As we've discussed, understanding the prompt and delivering a heartfelt account of your actions is key. It's not just about the deeds but the drive and passion behind them. Authenticity remains paramount. As you finalize your essay, let your genuine voice shine through. This essay is a snapshot of your journey—make it resonate. Best of luck!

I hope you found this guide useful. Navigating campus life can be daunting, but you don’t have to do it alone. Once you're accepted into college, hop onto MeetYourClass – your go-to platform to find roommates, friends, and your community. Connect with like-minded students, find your perfect roommate, and immerse yourself in campus culture. As you embark on your application journey, remember: your next chapter of friendships and experiences is just a click away. Best of luck, and we hope to see you soon on MeetYourClass!

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Blog > Essay Advice , Supplementals > How to Write a Community Supplemental Essay (with Examples)

How to Write a Community Supplemental Essay (with Examples)

Admissions officer reviewed by Ben Bousquet, M.Ed Former Vanderbilt University

Written by Kylie Kistner, MA Former Willamette University Admissions

Key Takeaway

If you're applying to college, there's a good chance you'll be writing a Community Essay for one (or lots) of your supplementals. In this post, we show you how to write one that stands out.

This post is one in a series of posts about the supplemental essays . You can read our core “how-to” supplemental post here .

When schools admit you, they aren’t just admitting you to be a student. They’re also admitting you to be a community member.

Community supplemental essays help universities understand how you would fit into their school community. At their core, Community prompts allow you to explicitly show an admissions officer why you would be the perfect addition to the school’s community.

Let’s get into what a Community supplemental essay is, what strategies you can use to stand out, and which steps you can take to write the best one possible.

What is a Community supplemental essay?

Community supplemental essay prompts come in a number of forms. Some ask you to talk about a community you already belong to, while others ask you to expand on how you would contribute to the school you’re applying to.

Let’s look at a couple of examples.

1: Rice University

Rice is lauded for creating a collaborative atmosphere that enhances the quality of life for all members of our campus community. The Residential College System and undergraduate life is heavily influenced by the unique life experiences and cultural tradition each student brings. What life perspectives would you contribute to the Rice community? 500 word limit.

2: Swarthmore College

Swarthmore students’ worldviews are often forged by their prior experiences and exposure to ideas and values. Our students are often mentored, supported, and developed by their immediate context—in their neighborhoods, communities of faith, families, and classrooms. Reflect on what elements of your home, school, or community have shaped you or positively impacted you. How have you grown or changed because of the influence of your community?

Community Essay Strategy

Your Community essay strategy will likely depend on the kind of Community essay you’re asked to write. As with all supplemental essays, the goal of any community essay should be to write about the strengths that make you a good fit for the school in question.

How to write about a community to which you belong

Most Community essay prompts give you a lot of flexibility in how you define “community.” That means that the community you write about probably isn’t limited to the more formal communities you’re part of like family or school. Your communities can also include friend groups, athletic teams, clubs and organizations, online communities, and more.

There are two things you should consider before you even begin writing your essay.

What school values is the prompt looking for?

Whether they’re listed implicitly or explicitly, Community essay prompts often include values that you can align your essay response with.

To explain, let’s look at this short supplemental prompt from the University of Notre Dame:

If you were given unlimited resources to help solve one problem in your community, what would it be and how would you accomplish it?

Now, this prompt doesn’t outright say anything about values. But the question itself, even being so short, implies a few values:

a) That you should be active in your community

b) That you should be aware of your community’s problems

c) That you know how to problem-solve

d) That you’re able to collaborate with your community

After dissecting the prompt for these values, you can write a Community essay that showcases how you align with them.

What else are admissions officers learning about you through the community you choose?

In addition to showing what a good community member you are, your Community supplemental essays can also let you talk about other parts of your experience. Doing so can help you find the perfect narrative balance among all your essays.

Let’s use a quick example.

If I’m a student applying to computer science programs, then I might choose to write about the community I’ve found in my robotics team. More specifically, I might write about my role as cheerleader and principle problem-solver of my robotics team. Writing about my robotics team allows me to do two things:

Show that I’m a really supportive person in my community, and

Show that I’m on a robotics team that means a lot to me.

Now, it’s important not to co-opt your Community essay and turn it into a secret Extracurricular essay , but it’s important to be thinking about all the information an admissions officer will learn about you based on the community you choose to focus on.

How to write about what you’ll contribute to your new community

The other segment of Community essays are those that ask you to reflect on how your specific experiences will contribute to your new community.

It’s important that you read each prompt carefully so you know what to focus your essay on.

These kinds of Community prompts let you explicitly drive home why you belong at the school you’re applying to.

Here are two suggestions to get you started.

Draw out the values.

This kind of Community prompt also typically contains some kind of reference to values. The Rice prompt is a perfect example of this:

Rice is lauded for creating a collaborative atmosphere that enhances the quality of life for all members of our campus community . The Residential College System and undergraduate life is heavily influenced by the unique life experiences and cultural tradition each student brings. What life perspectives would you contribute to the Rice community? 500 word limit.

There are several values here:

a) Collaboration

b) Enhancing quality of life

c) For all members of the community

d) Residential system (AKA not just in the classroom)

e) Sharing unique life experiences and cultural traditions with other students

Note that the actual question of the prompt is “What life perspectives would you contribute to the Rice community?” If you skimmed the beginning of the prompt to get to the question, you’d miss all these juicy details about what a Rice student looks like.

But with them in mind, you can choose to write about a life perspective that you hold that aligns with these five values.

Find detailed connections to the school.

Since these kinds of Community prompts ask you what you would contribute to the school community, this is your chance to find the most logical and specific connections you can. Browse the school website and social media to find groups, clubs, activities, communities, or support systems that are related to your personal background and experiences. When appropriate based on the prompt, these kinds of connections can help you show how good a fit you are for the school and community.

How to do Community Essay school research

Looking at school values means doing research on the school’s motto, mission statement, and strategic plans. This information is all carefully curated by a university to reflect the core values, initiatives, and goals of an institution. They can guide your Community essay by giving you more values options to include.

We’ll use the Rice mission statement as an example. It says,

As a leading research university with a distinctive commitment to undergraduate education, Rice University aspires to pathbreaking research , unsurpassed teaching , and contribution to the betterment of our world . It seeks to fulfill this mission by cultivating a diverse community of learning and discovery that produces leaders across the spectrum of human endeavor.

I’ve bolded just a few of the most important values we can draw out.

As we’ll see in the next section, I can use these values to brainstorm my Community essay.

How to write a Community Supplemental Essay

Step 1: Read the prompt closely & identify any relevant values.

When writing any supplemental essay, your first step should always be to closely read the prompt. You can even annotate it. It’s important to do this so you know exactly what is being asked of you.

With Community essays specifically, you can also highlight any values you think the prompt is asking you to elaborate on.

Keeping track of the prompt will make sure that you’re not missing anything an admissions officer will be on the lookout for.

Step 2: Brainstorm communities you’re involved in.

If you’re writing a Community essay that asks you to discuss a community you belong to, then your next step will be brainstorming all of your options.

As you brainstorm, keep a running list. Your list can include all kinds of communities you’re involved in.

Communities:

  • Model United Nations
  • Youth group
  • Instagram book club
  • My Discord group

Step 3: Think about the role(s) you play in your selected community.

Narrow down your community list to a couple of options. For each remaining option, identify the roles you played, actions you took, and significance you’ve drawn from being part of that group.

Community: Orchestra

These three columns help you get at the most important details you need to include in your community essay.

Step 4: Identify any relevant connections to the school.

Depending on the question the prompt asks of you, your last step may be to do some school research.

Let’s return to the Rice example.

After researching the Rice mission statement, we know that Rice values community members who want to contribute to the “betterment of our world.”

Ah ha! Now we have something solid to work from.

With this value in mind, I can choose to write about a perspective that shows my investment in creating a better world. Maybe that perspective is a specific kind of fundraising tenacity. Maybe it’s always looking for those small improvements that have a big impact. Maybe it’s some combination of both. Whatever it is, I can write a supplemental essay that reflects the values of the university.

Community Essay Mistakes

While writing Community essays may seem fairly straightforward, there are actually a number of ways they can go awry. Specifically, there are three common mistakes students make that you should be on the lookout for.

They don’t address the specific requests of the prompt.

As with all supplemental essays, your Community essay needs to address what the prompt is asking you to do. In Community essays especially, you’ll need to assess whether you’re being asked to talk about a community you’re already part of or the community you hope to join.

Neglecting to read the prompt also means neglecting any help the prompt gives you in terms of values. Remember that you can get clues as to what the school is looking for by analyzing the prompt’s underlying values.

They’re too vague.

Community essays can also go awry when they’re too vague. Your Community essay should reflect on specific, concrete details about your experience. This is especially the case when a Community prompt asks you to talk about a specific moment, challenge, or sequence of events.

Don’t shy away from details. Instead, use them to tell a compelling story.

They don’t make any connections to the school.

Finally, Community essays that don’t make any connections to the school in question miss out on a valuable opportunity to show school fit. Recall from our supplemental essay guide that you should always write supplemental essays with an eye toward showing how well you fit into a particular community.

Community essays are the perfect chance to do that, so try to find relevant and logical school connections to include.

Community Supplemental Essay Example

Example essay: robotics community.

University of Michigan: Everyone belongs to many different communities and/or groups defined by (among other things) shared geography, religion, ethnicity, income, cuisine, interest, race, ideology, or intellectual heritage. Choose one of the communities to which you belong, and describe that community and your place within it. (Required for all applicants; minimum 100 words/maximum 300 words)

From Blendtec’s “Will it Blend?” videos to ZirconTV’s “How to Use a Stud Finder,” I’m a YouTube how-to fiend. This propensity for fix-it knowledge has not only served me well, but it’s also been a lifesaver for my favorite community: my robotics team(( The writer explicitly states the community they’ll be focusing on.)) . While some students spend their after-school hours playing sports or video games, I spend mine tinkering in my garage with three friends, one of whom is made of metal.

Last year, I Googled more fixes than I can count. Faulty wires, misaligned soldering, and failed code were no match for me. My friends watched in awe as I used Boolean Operators to find exactly the information I sought.(( The writer clearly articulates their place in the community.)) But as I agonized over chassis reviews, other unsearchable problems arose.

First((This entire paragraph fulfills the “describe that community” direction in the prompt.)) , there was the matter of registering for our first robotics competition. None of us familiar with bureaucracy, David stepped up and made some calls. His maturity and social skills helped us immediately land a spot. The next issue was branding. Our robot needed a name and a logo, and Connor took it upon himself to learn graphic design. We all voted on Archie’s name and logo design to find the perfect match. And finally, someone needed to enter the ring. Archie took it from there, winning us first place.

The best part about being in this robotics community is the collaboration and exchange of knowledge.((The writer emphasizes a clear strength: collaboration within their community. It’s clear that the writer values all contributions to the team.))  Although I can figure out how to fix anything, it’s impossible to google social skills, creativity, or courage. For that information, only friends will do. I can only imagine the fixes I’ll bring to the University of Michigan and the skills I’ll learn in return at part of the Manufacturing Robotics community((The writer ends with a forward-looking connection to the school in question.)) .

Want to see even more supplemental essay examples? Check out our college essay examples post . 

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How to Write Supplemental Essays that Will Impress Admissions Officers

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How to Write a College Essay (Exercises + Examples)

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Extracurricular Magnitude and Impact

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[This article is part of a new series where we will be dissecting each of the UC essay prompts in depth, providing examples and tips on how you can make your application stand out.]

Click here to read yesterday’s post about UC Prompt #6.

Prompt #7: What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?

Struggling with writing your college application essay?

Read our Ultimate Guide to Stand Out College Essays to learn the tips and techniques on writing a winning essay and maximize your college admission chances!  

This prompt gives you an opportunity to show UCs the type of role you have in your current communities, and how you plan on carrying that to their campus communities.

But what exactly defines a community? This prompt is actually a lot broader than many might think, because the word “community” encompasses so many different groups. Every single student belongs in some sort of community, including but not limited to your:

Neighborhood

The list goes on! This would be the essay to talk about all those hours you spent volunteering at the library or that time you motivated your school to donate to a cause you care deeply about. An important thing to remember is that the experience or community doesn’t necessarily have to be a super unique and impressive opportunity. What matters is the individual contribution and impact you were able to make on this group. 

For example, UC admissions officers would rather see that you helped implement a summer reading program for kids at your local library than read about how you just filed papers at your senator’s office. In the same vein, focus on specificity rather than being broad about your contributions.

Moreover, I think it’s important to also explain how your impact on this community affected you . What did you learn from the experience, and how will you apply that to the future? Admissions officers are trying to figure out how your past experiences will translate into future contributions to their campus community.

Here’s how you might structure this essay:

Describe your community and how it was like before you stepped into it

Explain your thought process in determining the necessary impact that you wanted to make

Detail the steps you took to implement the specific impact you made

Reflect on how the experience affected or changed you

Think about how you might bring the lessons you learned from this experience to college or the future

7EDU has helped hundreds of students connect their experiences to a compelling story. Get started early with a free consultation with our experts.

If you found this article helpful, check out the rest of our deconstructed UC Prompts below:

UC Essay Prompts Explained Writing UC Prompt 1 Tips: Leadership Experience Writing UC Prompt 2 Tips: Your Creative Side Writing UC Prompt 3 Tips:  Greatest Talent Writing UC Prompt 4 Tips:  Educational Experiences Writing UC Prompt 5 Tips:  Significant Challenge Writing UC Prompt 6 Tips:  Favorite Subject Writing UC Prompt 7 Tips:  Improving your Community Writing UC Prompt 8 Tips:  How do you Stand Out?

making my community a better place essay

Your chancing factors

Extracurriculars.

making my community a better place essay

How to Write the MIT “Community” Essay

This article was written based on the information and opinions presented by Hale Jaeger in a CollegeVine livestream. You can watch the full livestream for more info.

What’s Covered

What is a community.

  • Impact and Personal Significance

Example #1: Tutoring a Friend

Example #2: managing food waste.

Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) is consistently ranked as one of the top five universities in the nation, according to US News and World Report. Based in Cambridge, Massachusetts, MIT is known for its rigorous STEM (science, technology, engineering, and mathematics), business, and entrepreneurship programs. It uses its own application system called MyMIT instead of Common Application, and applicants are required to submit five essays. The third essay prompt reads:

“At MIT, we bring people together to better the lives of others. MIT students work to improve their communities in different ways, from tackling the world’s biggest challenges to being a good friend. Describe one way in which you have contributed to your community, whether in your family, the classroom, your neighborhood, etc. (225 words)”

In this article, we discuss how to approach the prompt and provide tips for writing your essay. For an overview of the five essay prompts and guidance on how to approach them, check out our post on how to write the MIT application essays .

This prompt asks you to reflect on the impact that you have had on your community and the specific ways that you have worked to improve the lives of others within it. A community is defined broadly and includes, but is not limited to, one or more of the following: 

  • Your nuclear or extended family
  • Clubs and teams that you are a member of
  • The street or neighborhood where you live
  • A place where you work
  • A religious community or house of worship
  • A racial or ethnic group

Impact and Personal Significance

The specific way that you have contributed to the community you choose to write about doesn’t need to be award winning or impressive. You could write about being a good friend, taking care of your neighbor’s pets, or hosting a weekly coffee hour for members of your church. Anything from your life is worth writing about as long as you have made a positive, measurable, and clear impact on the lives of others.

Beyond having concrete outcomes, you should also have gained something from this experience, such as a new perspective or understanding of yourself and the world around you. It’s important that you communicate how you have changed and grown as a result of this experience. By weaving together the impact of your contribution to others with its significance to you personally, you demonstrate that you not only know how to give of yourself but also that the act of giving is something from which you derive meaning.

Ultimately, this essay is used by MIT admissions officers to predict who you will be in the MIT community based on how you interact with and care for others and your ability to turn empathy into action and direct service. Admissions officers want to see that you are generous in spirit, eager to make a difference, and care deeply about adding value to your community.

For example, suppose an applicant writes about tutoring a friend on their varsity soccer team in mathematics. The person was struggling in math class, worried about failing, and feeling really demoralized. The applicant writes about offering to tutor that friend pro bono because they know that money is tight for the friend’s family. After working together five days a week for two months, the friend’s math test scores start improving, and they finally get their first A on a test. Beyond the improved test scores, the friend starts to really understand and internalize various mathematical concepts and problem-solving techniques to the point where math starts to become fun and interesting. 

The applicant should write not only about the positive impact (improved grades and outlook) on their friend but also how the experience was personally significant and illuminating. Perhaps this experience has inspired them to seriously consider a career in teaching because helping others understand difficult concepts is meaningful work to them.

Consider another example. An applicant is shocked to find out that their school generates a sizable amount of food waste. Instead of dumping the waste into the landfill, the applicant decides to use their position on the student council to liaise with a sustainability group to develop a two-pronged system of composting and donating leftover food. After this system is successful within the applicant’s school, the applicant works with administrators and students at schools across the school district to implement a similar system. 

The applicant could write about the experience of developing the food waste management system, the quantitative and qualitative benefits of such a program to the community and the environment, and the personal satisfaction that they derived from implementing such a program. Additionally, they may discuss their newfound interest in pursuing an academic and professional career at the intersection of agriculture, public policy, and environmental studies.

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UC Essay Example: Personal Insight Question #7

by Winning Ivy Prep Team | Feb 3, 2023 | UC Personal Insight Essay Examples

UC Essay Examples

This UC Prompt is one that students seem to gravitate towards. So, we have tons of UC Personal Insight Essay examples for this one. 

So, what have you done to make your school or community a better place?

A lot, I’m sure. But how do you put all this passion and hard-work into 350 words? That’s what makes answering the UC Personal Insight Questions so tricky. But don’t fret! In this post, we’ve got a successful, creative UC essay prompt 7 example for you. 

And if you’re looking for more UC Personal Insight Questions examples, checkout this blogpost: 2020 Ultimate Guide: 20 UC essay examples .

UC Personal Insight Example: What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?

Within six months, four students from my school district committed suicide, shocking the community.  These were our classmates and neighbors—why did they do it?  As a good friend to one of the students, I knew he suffered from insomnia—and I wondered about the correlation between unhealthy sleep habits and depression.   

My sorrow and yearning for clarity directed me towards sleep research—I walked into Dr. _____ leading sleep research lab at the VA Hospital, seeking to join their mission to better understand sleep.  I was blessed when she took me on as an intern during my sophomore year.  Dr. _____’s lab focuses on cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-i).  CBT-i tackles insomnia on two fronts: cognitive therapy helps patients overcome mental sleeping blocks, and behavioral therapy ensures that the patients’ behaviors enhance sleep.  We investigate individual effects of the cognitive and behavioral parts.

This was my chance to learn about the science behind insomnia—especially about its effects on our overall wellness—to better understand my friend’s tragic situation.  My first duty was patient recruitment through marketing our clinical study to the community, but soon transitioned to data analysis and treatment.  Statistical programs such as R and SAS became my best friends, and tests for cognitive ability and neuropsychological status like MOCA and RBANS were my favorite patient evaluations.  I’ve always enjoyed science, but my time with Dr. _____ helped me gain a deeper appreciation for research.

Research and medicine are integral parts of my future—there is still ways to go in finding an effective long-term solution to teenage sleep issues and well-being.   I have ideas such as marketing CBT-i sleep therapy to increase its accessibility and prevent more tragedies like the ones at my school, and the guidance of UC professors as well as the tight-knit student body gives me the best chances of pursuing my goals and contribute back to the community.  An education in the University of California system would provide me with plentiful resources to continue making strides towards solving this problem.

Source: One of my students that was admitted to Berkeley & UCLA.

UC Personal Insight Prompt #7 Pro Tips

Hold on! Before you go off and write your UC Essays, take a moment and analyze the strengths of this UC Personal Insight example. We’re giving you highly successful UC essay examples here — in fact, this student got into all the UCs he applied to, including UCLA and Berkeley. So, here are some best practices and tips. 

UC Essay Example: Personal Insight Questions

UC Prompt 7 Tip #1: Consider a unique angle

Most essays I read that attempt to answer this UC Personal Insight Question prompt 7 usually delve deeply into volunteering and community service. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but it’s always nice to read a fresh take on a prompt that gets almost monotonous. This UC essay example does a fantastic job of creating a unique take on this prompt!

UC Essay Example Tip #2: Discuss goals for the future

Many UC essays I read do a good job of telling the story of the past/present. For instance, this UC essay example does just that — it talks in great detail about the student’s research and the motivation behind his research project. This UC Personal Insight example however, goes one step further than most others: The student ends the essay by giving a concrete idea of how he wants to take his current research and delve deeper into it at a UC. 

This idea is important because UC admissions officers love to see that students aren’t doing activities for the sake of doing it — admissions officers love it when students are passionate about the extracurricular activity, and have ideas to continue pursuing it throughout college to contribute to the academic environment!

UC Essay Example Tip #3. Show your curiosity

A common pitfall that students have when writing UC essays (and college essays in general) is throwing around words like “passion” with nothing to back it up. 

Remember: you’ve got to show , not tell. 

This particular UC essay example does a great job doing that. This student makes it abundantly clear: He has a genuine, deep love for learning. He has a personal WHY he is invested in tackling the issue of sleep, which compels him to follow his curiosities into a research setting. 

This motivation to seek opportunities to deepen your interests in an academic setting is absolutely critical to be a successful UC applicant (at least, for UCLA and UC Berkeley). 

Alright, now that we’ve gone through this successful UC essay prompt 7 example, you’re probably wondering: how are you going to write a stellar UC essay yourself? Well, we’ve got you covered! Take a look at this UC Personal Insight essay guide . 

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The Community Essay for the Common App Supplements

Mark montgomery.

  • July 24, 2023

community essay for the Common App

How do you write the community essay for the Common App? Many college applications require supplemental essays. A common supplementary question asks you to consider and write about a community to which you belong. 

The definition of community is open to interpretation and can be difficult to pin down. We each belong to a wide variety of communities ranging from our family and friend groups to being members of the global community.  

My Communities 

For example, I belong to a bunch of different communities. I sing in a choir, so I’m part of the community of the Colorado Chorale community (and within that community, I’m a member of the tenor section). I go to see plays a lot, so I’m a member of the “theater-going” community. Birdwatching can be fun, I find, so I belong to the “community of birdwatchers.” I belong to a club or two, so I’m a member or those communities. I belong to a political party, which is a community in a sense. I went to Dartmouth , so I belong to a community of alumni, both locally and globally. Same with my grad school: my friends and I still talk about belonging to the “ Fletcher Community .” 

making my community a better place essay

When I lived in Hong Kong, I was a member of the American community, which was part of the large expatriate community. I speak French and live in Denver. Therefore, I’m part of the community of Denverites who speak French as a second language. I live in a specific neighborhood in the city of Denver in the State of Colorado in the United States. All of those communities define me in one way or another. Finally, at a more intimate level, I also belong to a family community that is very important to me.

Really, when you stop to think about it, we all belong to a large number of overlapping communities. Think of a Venn diagram with lots of overlapping circles—and we are at that tiny dot in the center where each of those circles overlaps. 

Why write the community essay for the Common App?

Why do colleges ask you to write this community essay? In writing about community as it relates to you, you reveal important details at the core of who you are. Colleges are hoping to bring students to their campuses who will contribute in a positive way to campus culture, whether intellectually, socially, or through their extracurricular activities. 

They want students who will be successful in their new community and enrich the college through their varied backgrounds, experiences, accomplishments, activities and behavior. Thus, the way you answer this prompt will help them imagine if you would be a good addition to their campus community.

Here are some examples of the community essay prompt:

  • Please complete the following, and have a little fun doing so: “I appreciate my community because …” (up to 300  characters)
  • At MIT , we bring people together to better the lives of others. MIT students work to improve their communities in different ways, from tackling the world’s biggest challenges to being good friends. Describe one way in which you have contributed to your community, whether in your family, the classroom, your neighborhood, etc. (200-250 words)
  • What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?  (up to 350 words)
  • Everyone belongs to many different communities and/or groups defined by (among other things) shared geography, religion, ethnicity, income, cuisine, interest, race, ideology, or intellectual heritage. Choose one of the communities to which you belong, and describe that community and your place within it.  (up to 300 words)
  • Macalester is a community that includes people from many different backgrounds, some who have lived around the world and others who have lived in one place their entire lives. Please write an essay about how your background, experiences, or outlook might add to the Mac community, academically and personally. (up to 500 words)*

* Note: this last prompt doesn’t ask about a community to which you currently belong, but rather asks you to reflect on what you will bring to the community. This essay is a mix of activities and community essays. However, this essay should emphasize what the applicant would add to the campus community.

The community essay vs. the community service essay

Notice that this essay is not narrowly focused on any service you might provide to your community. Of course, it is entirely possible that your involvement in a community may include some sort of involvement that helps to promote the community and the interests of its members in some way.  

However, the community essay prompts do not specifically ask you to talk about this service. The prompts want you to think about what it means to “belong,” and how you conceive of yourself in the larger world. A sense of community may, indeed, lead you to act in certain ways to advance a cause, donate your time, or exert your energies to meet the needs of your community. Your actions certainly may become part of this community essay as a way to demonstrate the ways in which you identify with—and contribute to—this community. But the focus of this essay is on that sense of belonging. 

Service to your community—or to someone else’s?

To put a finer point to it, it is possible to provide “community service” to communities to which we do not belong. We might donate time to the homeless community—but that does not make us homeless. We might spend time working with refugees, even if we, ourselves, are not refugees. Or while we might enjoy good health, we still might donate time to make meals for the critically ill.

So make sure that when you write the community essay you zero in on a community that defines you, and not on the service you devote to a community that is not your own.  

When preparing for the community essay for the Common App, DO THESE THINGS:

Think carefully about your choice of community.

The community you choose says a lot about you. Think carefully about what message even just the choice of community might convey to your reader. In fact, you may even want to start by asking yourself “What aspects of who I am do I want the reader to know?” and then pick the community that will do that in the best possible way. Think, too, how your choice can help you differentiate yourself and share important insight into who you are. 

Factors for you to consider as you brainstorm the community essay for the Common App:

  • Which communities are most important to you and why?
  • What do these communities say about you that you haven’t shared with your reader elsewhere in your application?
  • What roles have you played in these communities?
  • How would you measure the impact of your participation in these communities?
  • What does your participation in these communities say about your character, qualities, and how you interact with the world around you?
  • What does the overall message say about you as a future college student?

Use this as an opportunity to reveal more about yourself

This prompt isn’t just to elaborate on your community; this is another opportunity to reveal important qualities about yourself. Explain why this community is so important to you. Write about what you learned about yourself and how it has shaped who you are. Reveal how you have made contributions to this community.  

Show, don’t tell

Like every essay, the details show your reader what you want them to know about you. Be specific, but selective, with the details you include. Every word should contribute to the message you want to share with your reader. If you have space, share an anecdote to help the reader visualize the qualities that you are trying to share.

Ensure you answer the prompt fully and directly

Some of these prompts are simple and short, but other schools have long prompts. Don’t get lost in answering the first part of the prompt and forget about the remainder. Re-read the prompt after you have drafted your ideas to make sure you’ve addressed everything. 

In addition, sometimes, if you have multiple applications that ask a “community” question, you may be tempted to simply repurpose the same exact essay from one application to the other. Beware! Each prompt will have different nuances to it, and you will need to ensure that you are actually answering the prompt that is being asked. You can certainly re-use the content from one application to the next, but you should tailor how you express those ideas so that they match the prompt.

When drafting the community essay for the Common App, DON’T DO these things

Don’t be afraid to “think outside of the box”.

Think outside the box when you write the community essay

Some communities to which we belong are obvious because we participate in them on a daily basis. These would include our families and our friend groups. Others are obvious because they are clearly defined: the football team or student government. But what about those informal communities, occasional communities, or hard-to-define communities to which you might belong? Are you a crafty person who blogs about your creations with an online community?

Do you belong to a book group in your neighborhood? Are you a classic car connoisseur? Even writing about things that might not seem like natural “communities” can work quite well as long as they reveal important aspects of who you are. For example, we’ve read a successful “community” essay about a student who belonged to a community of anonymous subway riders. We read another about a community of students who wear crazy socks to school. 

Don’t share obvious details

The detail about the community is not the most important part of your response, even if the prompt does say to “describe a community to which you belong.” Consider only sharing those details about the community that ties into what you are trying to share about yourself. For example, most drama groups put on performances for the public.

But not all drama groups are community-based and have participants ranging in age from 9 to 99. If part of your story is about this multi-generational community, then this detail plays a part in your story. Include those details that play a role in why the community is important or impactful for you.

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Remember these things about the community essay for the Common App

No matter which community you choose to write about, you want to be sure that you reflect deeply about why this community is important to you. If you have a longer word count, you can consider using an anecdote to share with the reader, but for the shorter prompts, keep your writing personal, but just more to the point.

And don’t lose sight of the reason that you are writing this essay. You are applying to be a part of a new community. You want to show that you have a deep appreciation for the sense of satisfaction, dedication, and attachment that comes with being a member of a community. The purpose is to demonstrate that you know how to nurture the community and how you nourish others’ sense of belonging in that circle.  

Colleges want to know that you will keep the flame of that college community alive, even as you graduate and move on with your life. The admissions office wants to know that you will cherish and contribute to the community that they already call their own. Convince them that you deserve to belong.

Mark Montgomery

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Sat / act prep online guides and tips, how to write a great community service essay.

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Are you applying to a college or a scholarship that requires a community service essay? Do you know how to write an essay that will impress readers and clearly show the impact your work had on yourself and others?

Read on to learn step-by-step instructions for writing a great community service essay that will help you stand out and be memorable.

What Is a Community Service Essay? Why Do You Need One?

A community service essay is an essay that describes the volunteer work you did and the impact it had on you and your community. Community service essays can vary widely depending on specific requirements listed in the application, but, in general, they describe the work you did, why you found the work important, and how it benefited people around you.

Community service essays are typically needed for two reasons:

#1: To Apply to College

  • Some colleges require students to write community service essays as part of their application or to be eligible for certain scholarships.
  • You may also choose to highlight your community service work in your personal statement.

#2: To Apply for Scholarships

  • Some scholarships are specifically awarded to students with exceptional community service experiences, and many use community service essays to help choose scholarship recipients.
  • Green Mountain College offers one of the most famous of these scholarships. Their "Make a Difference Scholarship" offers full tuition, room, and board to students who have demonstrated a significant, positive impact through their community service

Getting Started With Your Essay

In the following sections, I'll go over each step of how to plan and write your essay. I'll also include sample excerpts for you to look through so you can get a better idea of what readers are looking for when they review your essay.

Step 1: Know the Essay Requirements

Before your start writing a single word, you should be familiar with the essay prompt. Each college or scholarship will have different requirements for their essay, so make sure you read these carefully and understand them.

Specific things to pay attention to include:

  • Length requirement
  • Application deadline
  • The main purpose or focus of the essay
  • If the essay should follow a specific structure

Below are three real community service essay prompts. Read through them and notice how much they vary in terms of length, detail, and what information the writer should include.

From the Equitable Excellence Scholarship:

"Describe your outstanding achievement in depth and provide the specific planning, training, goals, and steps taken to make the accomplishment successful. Include details about your role and highlight leadership you provided. Your essay must be a minimum of 350 words but not more than 600 words."

From the Laura W. Bush Traveling Scholarship:

"Essay (up to 500 words, double spaced) explaining your interest in being considered for the award and how your proposed project reflects or is related to both UNESCO's mandate and U.S. interests in promoting peace by sharing advances in education, science, culture, and communications."

From the LULAC National Scholarship Fund:

"Please type or print an essay of 300 words (maximum) on how your academic studies will contribute to your personal & professional goals. In addition, please discuss any community service or extracurricular activities you have been involved in that relate to your goals."

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Step 2: Brainstorm Ideas

Even after you understand what the essay should be about, it can still be difficult to begin writing. Answer the following questions to help brainstorm essay ideas. You may be able to incorporate your answers into your essay.

  • What community service activity that you've participated in has meant the most to you?
  • What is your favorite memory from performing community service?
  • Why did you decide to begin community service?
  • What made you decide to volunteer where you did?
  • How has your community service changed you?
  • How has your community service helped others?
  • How has your community service affected your plans for the future?

You don't need to answer all the questions, but if you find you have a lot of ideas for one of two of them, those may be things you want to include in your essay.

Writing Your Essay

How you structure your essay will depend on the requirements of the scholarship or school you are applying to. You may give an overview of all the work you did as a volunteer, or highlight a particularly memorable experience. You may focus on your personal growth or how your community benefited.

Regardless of the specific structure requested, follow the guidelines below to make sure your community service essay is memorable and clearly shows the impact of your work.

Samples of mediocre and excellent essays are included below to give you a better idea of how you should draft your own essay.

Step 1: Hook Your Reader In

You want the person reading your essay to be interested, so your first sentence should hook them in and entice them to read more. A good way to do this is to start in the middle of the action. Your first sentence could describe you helping build a house, releasing a rescued animal back to the wild, watching a student you tutored read a book on their own, or something else that quickly gets the reader interested. This will help set your essay apart and make it more memorable.

Compare these two opening sentences:

"I have volunteered at the Wishbone Pet Shelter for three years."

"The moment I saw the starving, mud-splattered puppy brought into the shelter with its tail between its legs, I knew I'd do whatever I could to save it."

The first sentence is a very general, bland statement. The majority of community service essays probably begin a lot like it, but it gives the reader little information and does nothing to draw them in. On the other hand, the second sentence begins immediately with action and helps persuade the reader to keep reading so they can learn what happened to the dog.

Step 2: Discuss the Work You Did

Once you've hooked your reader in with your first sentence, tell them about your community service experiences. State where you work, when you began working, how much time you've spent there, and what your main duties include. This will help the reader quickly put the rest of the essay in context and understand the basics of your community service work.

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Not including basic details about your community service could leave your reader confused.

Step 3: Include Specific Details

It's the details of your community service that make your experience unique and memorable, so go into the specifics of what you did.

For example, don't just say you volunteered at a nursing home; talk about reading Mrs. Johnson her favorite book, watching Mr. Scott win at bingo, and seeing the residents play games with their grandchildren at the family day you organized. Try to include specific activities, moments, and people in your essay. Having details like these let the readers really understand what work you did and how it differs from other volunteer experiences.

Compare these two passages:

"For my volunteer work, I tutored children at a local elementary school. I helped them improve their math skills and become more confident students."

"As a volunteer at York Elementary School, I worked one-on-one with second and third graders who struggled with their math skills, particularly addition, subtraction, and fractions. As part of my work, I would create practice problems and quizzes and try to connect math to the students' interests. One of my favorite memories was when Sara, a student I had been working with for several weeks, told me that she enjoyed the math problems I had created about a girl buying and selling horses so much that she asked to help me create math problems for other students."

The first passage only gives basic information about the work done by the volunteer; there is very little detail included, and no evidence is given to support her claims. How did she help students improve their math skills? How did she know they were becoming more confident?

The second passage is much more detailed. It recounts a specific story and explains more fully what kind of work the volunteer did, as well as a specific instance of a student becoming more confident with her math skills. Providing more detail in your essay helps support your claims as well as make your essay more memorable and unique.

Step 4: Show Your Personality

It would be very hard to get a scholarship or place at a school if none of your readers felt like they knew much about you after finishing your essay, so make sure that your essay shows your personality. The way to do this is to state your personal strengths, then provide examples to support your claims. Take some time to think about which parts of your personality you would like your essay to highlight, then write about specific examples to show this.

  • If you want to show that you're a motivated leader, describe a time when you organized an event or supervised other volunteers.
  • If you want to show your teamwork skills, write about a time you helped a group of people work together better.
  • If you want to show that you're a compassionate animal lover, write about taking care of neglected shelter animals and helping each of them find homes.

Step 5: State What You Accomplished

After you have described your community service and given specific examples of your work, you want to begin to wrap your essay up by stating your accomplishments. What was the impact of your community service? Did you build a house for a family to move into? Help students improve their reading skills? Clean up a local park? Make sure the impact of your work is clear; don't be worried about bragging here.

If you can include specific numbers, that will also strengthen your essay. Saying "I delivered meals to 24 home-bound senior citizens" is a stronger example than just saying "I delivered meals to lots of senior citizens."

Also be sure to explain why your work matters. Why is what you did important? Did it provide more parks for kids to play in? Help students get better grades? Give people medical care who would otherwise not have gotten it? This is an important part of your essay, so make sure to go into enough detail that your readers will know exactly what you accomplished and how it helped your community.

"My biggest accomplishment during my community service was helping to organize a family event at the retirement home. The children and grandchildren of many residents attended, and they all enjoyed playing games and watching movies together."

"The community service accomplishment that I'm most proud of is the work I did to help organize the First Annual Family Fun Day at the retirement home. My job was to design and organize fun activities that senior citizens and their younger relatives could enjoy. The event lasted eight hours and included ten different games, two performances, and a movie screening with popcorn. Almost 200 residents and family members attended throughout the day. This event was important because it provided an opportunity for senior citizens to connect with their family members in a way they aren't often able to. It also made the retirement home seem more fun and enjoyable to children, and we have seen an increase in the number of kids coming to visit their grandparents since the event."

The second passage is stronger for a variety of reasons. First, it goes into much more detail about the work the volunteer did. The first passage only states that she helped "organize a family event." That really doesn't tell readers much about her work or what her responsibilities were. The second passage is much clearer; her job was to "design and organize fun activities."

The second passage also explains the event in more depth. A family day can be many things; remember that your readers are likely not familiar with what you're talking about, so details help them get a clearer picture.

Lastly, the second passage makes the importance of the event clear: it helped residents connect with younger family members, and it helped retirement homes seem less intimidating to children, so now some residents see their grand kids more often.

Step 6: Discuss What You Learned

One of the final things to include in your essay should be the impact that your community service had on you. You can discuss skills you learned, such as carpentry, public speaking, animal care, or another skill.

You can also talk about how you changed personally. Are you more patient now? More understanding of others? Do you have a better idea of the type of career you want? Go into depth about this, but be honest. Don't say your community service changed your life if it didn't because trite statements won't impress readers.

In order to support your statements, provide more examples. If you say you're more patient now, how do you know this? Do you get less frustrated while playing with your younger siblings? Are you more willing to help group partners who are struggling with their part of the work? You've probably noticed by now that including specific examples and details is one of the best ways to create a strong and believable essay .

"As a result of my community service, I learned a lot about building houses and became a more mature person."

"As a result of my community service, I gained hands-on experience in construction. I learned how to read blueprints, use a hammer and nails, and begin constructing the foundation of a two-bedroom house. Working on the house could be challenging at times, but it taught me to appreciate the value of hard work and be more willing to pitch in when I see someone needs help. My dad has just started building a shed in our backyard, and I offered to help him with it because I know from my community service how much work it is. I also appreciate my own house more, and I know how lucky I am to have a roof over my head."

The second passage is more impressive and memorable because it describes the skills the writer learned in more detail and recounts a specific story that supports her claim that her community service changed her and made her more helpful.

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Step 7: Finish Strong

Just as you started your essay in a way that would grab readers' attention, you want to finish your essay on a strong note as well. A good way to end your essay is to state again the impact your work had on you, your community, or both. Reiterate how you changed as a result of your community service, why you found the work important, or how it helped others.

Compare these two concluding statements:

"In conclusion, I learned a lot from my community service at my local museum, and I hope to keep volunteering and learning more about history."

"To conclude, volunteering at my city's American History Museum has been a great experience. By leading tours and participating in special events, I became better at public speaking and am now more comfortable starting conversations with people. In return, I was able to get more community members interested in history and our local museum. My interest in history has deepened, and I look forward to studying the subject in college and hopefully continuing my volunteer work at my university's own museum."

The second passage takes each point made in the first passage and expands upon it. In a few sentences, the second passage is able to clearly convey what work the volunteer did, how she changed, and how her volunteer work benefited her community.

The author of the second passage also ends her essay discussing her future and how she'd like to continue her community service, which is a good way to wrap things up because it shows your readers that you are committed to community service for the long-term.

What's Next?

Are you applying to a community service scholarship or thinking about it? We have a complete list of all the community service scholarships available to help get your search started!

Do you need a community service letter as well? We have a step-by-step guide that will tell you how to get a great reference letter from your community service supervisor.

Thinking about doing community service abroad? Before you sign up, read our guide on some of the hazards of international volunteer trips and how to know if it's the right choice for you.

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points?   We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download them for free now:

Christine graduated from Michigan State University with degrees in Environmental Biology and Geography and received her Master's from Duke University. In high school she scored in the 99th percentile on the SAT and was named a National Merit Finalist. She has taught English and biology in several countries.

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18 UC Berkeley Essay Examples that Worked (2023)

UC Berkeley Essay Examples

If you want to get into the University of California, Berkeley in 2022, you need to write strong Personal Insight Question essays.

In this article I've gathered 18 of the best University of California essays that worked in recent years for you to learn from and get inspired.

What is UC Berkeley's Acceptance Rate?

UC Berkeley is one of the top public universities and therefore highly competitive to get admitted into.

This past year 112,854 students applied to Berkeley and only 16,412 got accepted. Which gives UC Berkeley an overall admit rate of 14.5%.

And as of 2022, the University of California no longer uses your SAT and ACT when deciding which students to admit.

UC Berkeley Acceptance Scattergram

This means that your Personal Insight Questions are even more important to stand out in the admissions process. That is, your essays are more heavily weighed.

If you're trying to get accepted to UC Berkeley, here are 18 of the best examples of Personal Insight Questions that got into Berkeley.

What are the UC Personal Insight Question Prompts for 2022-23?

The Personal Insight Questions (PIQs) are a set of eight questions asked by the UC application, of which students must answer four of those questions in 350 words or less.

Here are the Personal Insight Question prompts for this year:

  • Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.
  • Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
  • What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
  • Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
  • Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
  • Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.
  • What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
  • Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California?

18 UC Berkeley Personal Insight Question Examples

Here are the 18 best Berkeley essays that worked for each Personal Insight Question prompt #1-8.

If you're also applying to UCLA, check out more unique UCLA essays from admitted students.

UC Berkeley Example Essay #1

Uc berkeley example essay #2, uc berkeley example essay #3: clammy hands, uc berkeley example essay #4: memory, uc berkeley example essay #5: chemistry class, uc berkeley example essay #6, uc berkeley example essay #7: debate, uc berkeley example essay #8, uc berkeley example essay #9, uc berkeley example essay #10, uc berkeley example essay #11, uc berkeley example essay #12, uc berkeley example essay #13, uc berkeley example essay #14, uc berkeley example essay #15, uc berkeley example essay #16, uc berkeley example essay #17, uc berkeley example essay #18.

UC PIQ #1: Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time. (350 words max)

From an early age I became a translator for my mother anytime we went out in public. This experience forced me to have conversations with adults from a young age. It made me become a great communicator, while helping my parents overcome their language barrier.

Being a communicator has allowed me to lead. When I joined my school’s National Honor Society I was given the opportunity to lead. Applying the skills I used from being my mother’s translator I was able to do what no one else could, make the calls and start the club’s most successful event to date an annual Food Drive at a local Albertson’s, which collects over one ton of food every November. Also developing events like an egg hunt at the local elementary school, a goods drive for the Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles, and stabilizing a volunteer partnership with a local park. I have been able to grow as a leader, who actively communicates and brings parties together, planning events and having them run smoothly with minor issues. For instance, last year there was an issue with the homeless shelter not picking up the food for the food drive. In a spur of the moment solution I managed for club member’s parents to collectively deliver the food. My ability to communicate benefited me allowing me to find a solution to an unanticipated problem.

Throughout the four years I have been in journalism I have led; mentoring younger writers and improving the way the paper operates. Staying after hours, skyping with writers about their articles all helped establish my role as a leader, who is always supporting his team. I have done this while writing over 100 articles, editing tons of pages, and managing deadlines. I learned that while being a leader requires effort, it is the passion like I have for journalism that motivates me to lead in my community.

Being a leader so far in my life has taught me that I need to communicate, be passionate, and pass on my knowledge helping cultivate future leaders, who can expand and supersede my work.

UC PIQ #2: Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side. (350 words max)

Video games have cultivated my creative thought process. When I was a toddler I invented a game I would play with my brothers. It was nothing along the lines of Hide-and-Seek or Tag, but rather, it was meant to mimic a role-playing video game. It was called "Guy" and came with its own story, leveling system, and narrative story. While seemingly impossible to translate the mechanics of a video game into real life, the "Guy" trilogy provided hundreds of hours of fun to pass hot summer days and escape the harsh reality of our parents arguing and eventual divorce.

This thought process translated into my educational career. have always thought of a tough class or test as a video game. This mostly due to my excessive amounts of video games I played as a child through middle school (especially 7th grade). Each year comes bigger and "stronger" challenges, bigger and stronger bosses to defeat. My senior year will have me face the most powerful boss yet; full AP course load on top of heavy club involvement and community college classes.

Many thought of this "secret boss" as an impossible challenge; something that could never be beaten. No one from my school has ever attempted to take on such a challenge, let alone defeat it. That is probably what excites me about it. In a game, messing around with lower level enemies is fun for a while, but gets boring when it is too easy. The thought of a challenge so great and difficult makes the victory even more rewarding. Stormy skies, heavy rain, and epic boss battle music; I'll take that over a peaceful village any day. In the future, I seek to use this thinking to drive research. I think of abstract physics concepts like secret door and levels that need to be proven true or just a myth in the game. One day, I can make my own discovery of a secret "cheat code' that can help everyone who plays a little game called life.

UC PIQ #3: What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time? (350 words max)

I’ve always hated the feeling of clammy hands, the needless overflow of adrenaline rushing through my veins, and the piercing eyes that can see through my façade—the eyes that judge me. I felt like this debilitating anxiety that I suffered through was something I could not avoid when doing the thing I was most afraid of—public speaking. I still felt every sweat droplet run down my skin before each speech, and this anguish never completely dissipated. Fortunately, I learned to moderate my fear in high school when I decided to join the speech and debate program. My anxiety has slowly faded in intensity as I’ve gained certitude and poise with every tournament, and every chance I’m given to speak on behalf of others; this talent has allowed me to be a voice for the voiceless.

Out of all the national tournaments that I’ve competed in, the MLK invitational holds a distinct place in my heart. It was my first invitational tournament in which I competed exclusively in Lincoln Douglas debate. I only had two weeks to prepare myself since it was finals week, while my competitors had upwards of two months to prepare. I was fortunate to break into the final round, as my years of experience helped me to articulate and explain my few arguments more effectively, while also refuting my opponent’s.

I realized that the extent of one’s knowledge is useless if it cannot be made known in a way that is clear to others. I learned that preparation is necessary, but one can be so focused on what they are going to say that they don’t hear the arguments presented. I kept an open and ready mind for various claims and strategies which left me free to adapt to the opponent’s argumentative style each round. This ability to think on my feet has served me well in countless debates, speeches, and presentations. I continuously use these skills to become a better and more active listener in my daily interactions as well.

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My greatest skill is my ability to remember things really well, whether they be minute details or important information that should not be forgotten. Over time, I’ve had a knack for remembering details most people would not even bother to remember, such as old test scores, atomic masses, and other details involving numbers. My friends have always marveled at my ability to remember all these numbers. When I was in chemistry class, we used the periodic table so much that I soon began to remember the atomic mass of the more common elements, and even the molecular mass of common compounds like glucose or water. One of my best friends, who is undoubtedly the smartest person in our class, even finds it crazy that I can remember all these numbers and always tells me that my memory of numbers is amazing. I also used my memory to learn and remember how to solve the Rubik's cube, which amazes my friends, as they find it to be complex with many different, possible combinations.

This skill that I have developed, however, isn’t completely under my control, as sometimes I just remember random and irrelevant facts without really trying to do so. I recall one weekend when my eight-year-old cousin was attempting to memorize the digits of pi: I remembered them along with him, learning up to forty digits in just one day. The skill is seemingly natural and not something I have worked hard to develop, as I may be able to use my memory to my advantage, or it can be a disadvantage. It helps when I have multiple tests in one day, or a test with many questions where I have to remember a lot of information, such as finals. Sometimes, however, it is a disadvantage when I remember information during a test that is not relevant to the topic, such as random dates, names, or song lyrics, to name a few. This skill is very important to nonetheless, as it has assisted me all throughout my life in many tests and challenges involving memory.

UC PIQ #4: Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced. (350 words max)

At 10:30 pm on a hot, summer, Wednesday night, you would expect my friends and me to be having the time of our lives and going out on crazy high school adventures— but instead, we were actually stuck in a chemistry laboratory trying to map out the Lewis structure of sulfuric acid.

Over the summer of my sophomore year, my friends and I enrolled into ‘Introduction to Chemistry’, an evening course at our local community college. As a six-week summer course, I spent two hours in lecture, two hours in the laboratory, and another two hours studying on my own for four days a week for six weeks. It was evident that I struggled with adjusting to the pace of college when I received 19% on a quiz. I felt left behind, exhausted, and overall pathetic. No matter how many hours I spent studying, I couldn’t keep up. But instead of giving up, I picked up certain strategies like reading the material the night before, rewriting my notes, and joining a study group; eventually working my way up to a B.

At the end of that summer, I learned so much more than just chemistry. On top of having the raw experience of what college is like, my chemistry experience taught me that it is okay to fail. I discovered that failure is an essential part of learning. Coming to this realization inspired me to take more college courses and rigorous courses in high school. I transformed into a hungry learner, eager to fail, learn, and improve. By seizing the opportunity to take this course, I pushed myself beyond my limits. This experience and realization changed how I wanted to pursue the rest of high school, college, and life in general.

I walked into my first day of the chemistry class expecting to walk out with an A; but thankfully, I didn’t. Instead, I walked out of that class with a taste of the college experience and a principle that I now live by-- that it is okay to fail, as long as you get back up.

The relationship I cultivated with my school's college center, by simply being inquisitive, has been most significant. Over my years in high school the college center became my 2nd home, where I learned about extra opportunities and triumphed with help from counselors.

For instance, with help from my school’s college center I applied and was accepted as an LAUSD Superintendent Summer Scholar this past summer. The program selected 15 juniors out of over 450 applicants to work in one of 15 departments, and I was chosen to work for the communications department, which received over 70 applications – making me 1 of 70. Interning for LAUSD at their 29 floor high rise was very eye-opening and exposed me to working in communications alongside seasoned professionals. The opportunity gave me the chance to meet the Superintendent and school board members, who are politically in charge of my education. As part of the communications department I learned how the district operates a network of over 1,300 schools and saw how the 2nd largest school district shares info with stakeholders through universal press releases, phone calls, and the district homepage.

I wrote several articles for the district publication and worked with public information officers who taught me the principles of professionalism and how to communicate to over 1 million people. Recently, I was called from the district to become a part of their Media Advisory Council working alongside district heads, representing the students of LAUSD.

Working for LAUSD furthered my passion to pursue careers in both communication and education. I have always had a desire to be a journalist and the internship assured me of that. I want to write stories bringing student issues from areas like mine to light. Being exposed to the movers and shakers that control education in Los Angeles has heavily motivated me to become an educator and at some point become a school board member influencing the education students like me receive.

Support from the college center has spawned opportunities like a life-changing internship and set me on course for a future full of opportunity.

“Give me liberty, or give me death!”, I proudly exclaimed, finishing up a speech during my first Individual Event competition for Speech and Debate, also known as Forensics Workshop. Public speaking was always one of my shortcomings. During countless in-class presentations, I suffered from stage-fright and anxiety, and my voice always turned nervous and silent. I saw Speech and Debate as a solution to this barrier that hindered my ability to teach and learn. With excessive practice, I passed the tryout and found myself in the zero-period class. All of my teammates, however, joined because they loved chattering and arguing. I had the opposite reason: I despised public speaking.

I was definitely one of the least competitive members of the team, probably because I didn’t take the tournaments very seriously and mainly worried about being a better speaker for the future. Throughout the daily class, I engaged in impromptu competitions, speech interpretations, spontaneous arguments, etc... Throughout my two years on the team, my communication, reciting, writing, and arguing skills overall improved through participation in events such as Impromptu, Original Oratory, Oratorical Interpretation, Lincoln Douglas Debate, and Congress. I even achieved a Certificate of Excellence in my first competition for Oratorical Interpretation -- where we had to recite a historical or current speech -- for Patrick Henry’s “Give Me Liberty, or Give Me Death.”

I decided to quit Speech and Debate because I felt as if it has completed its purpose. After this educational experience, my communications skilled soared, so I could perform better in school, especially on essays and presentations. Leaving this activity after two years gave me more time to focus on other activities, and apply communications skills to them. In fact, I even did better in interviews (which is how I got into the Torrance Youth Development Program) and even obtained leadership positions in clubs such as Math Club and Science Olympiad Through my two years in Speech and Debate, I believe I became a much better thinker, speaker, and leader. Taking advantage of this opportunity boosted my self-esteem and overall made high school a better experience.

UC PIQ #5: Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement? (350 words max)

Although many would say that hardships are the greatest hindrance on a person, my hardships are my greatest assets. The hardships I have overcome are what push and drive me forward. If I had not gone through the failures of my 7th grade year I may have been satisfied as a B or C student. It is easy for us to use our hardships as excuses for not doing work, however, this is a mistake that many people make.

Through my struggles and failure, I have realized an important truth: I am not special. The world will continue to go on and expect me to contribute no matter what I have gone through. Everyone endures some type of obstacle in their life; what makes people different is how they handle them. Some sit around and cry "boo-hoo" waiting for people to feel sorry for them. Others actually take action to improve their situation.

Through hard work, I have been able to outperform my peers, yet I know there is still room for improvement. The thought of actual geniuses in top universities excited me; I long to learn from them and eventually surpass them, or perhaps enter a never ending race for knowledge with them. I used to live an hour away from school. I would have to wake up and be dropped off at a donut shop at 4 in the morning and then walk to school at 6:30 am. After school, I would have to walk to the public library and stay for as long as it was open then wait outside and get picked up around 9:30 pm. I am reluctant to retell this story; not because I am ashamed, but because it is not important. It doesn't matter what hardships I have endured, they do not determine who I am. What matters is what I have done.

At the start of high school, I saw nothing but success. From grades to extracurricular activities, everything seemed to be going smoothly. However, as my sophomore year progressed, this wave of success was soon swamped by a wave of disillusionment. I struggled to perform in Calculus and as a Vice-President, but instead of looking for a solution, I looked for excuses. Ultimately, when I was forced to face my two F’s and my lost elections, the world came crashing down. The vision I had meticulously planned out for the future seemed to shatter before my eyes. My self-confidence plummeted to an all-time low. I thought my life was over.

However, my response to this failure was what would ultimately determine the direction my life would take. In the end, I made the right choice: instead of continuing to blind myself with a false narrative that cast all the blame off my own shoulders, I admitted to my own shortcomings and used this experience as a lesson to grow from.

In doing so, I learned to focus on the aspects of my life that I was truly passionate about instead of spreading myself too thin. I learned to face challenges head-on instead cowering at the first sign of difficulty, even if it meant asking others for help. I learned to accept and utilize my own differences to create my own unique leadership style. Most importantly, rather than letting this mistake define me, I ignited a sense of determination that would guide me back on the right path no matter how many obstacles I encounter.

Looking back, this tragic mistake was a double-edged sword. While it definitely leaves a stain on my record, it is also likely that I wouldn’t have been able to find the same success a year later without the lessons I gained from this experience. At the end of the day, while I still grimace every time I contemplate my sophomore year, I understand now that this mistake is what has allowed me to develop into the person I am today.

Throughout my childhood, I grew up in a nine-person household where the channels of our TV never left the Filipino drama station and the air always smelled of Filipino food. But the moment I left home, I would go to a typical suburban elementary school as an average American kid at the playground. I grew up in a unique position which I both love and hate: being a second-generation Filipino American.

I love being a second-generation immigrant. I have the best of both worlds. But I also hate it. It chains me to this ongoing struggle of living under the high expectations of immigrant parents. How could I hate the part of me that I loved the most?

Growing up, I lived under the constant academic stress that my parents placed on me. Their expectations were through the roof, demanding that I only bring home A’s on my report card. My entire academic career was based on my parent’s expectations. Their eyes beat down on every test score I received. I loved them so much, but I could only handle so much. The stress ate me alive, but I silently continued to work hard.

Living under this stress is the biggest ongoing challenge of my life thus far. Until last year, I never understood why my parents expected so much from me. Finally being old enough to understand my parent’s point of view, I realize that they set these high expectations in the hopes that one day, all of the pain and struggles it took to get to America will pay off. Since then, I’ve overcome the high expectations of my parents by converting their pressure into a fireball of ambition and motivation, deeply ingrained in my mentality.

This intense desire to succeed in America as a second-generation immigrant is something that has and always will fuel my academic drive. As the first person in my family to go to college in America, I’ve made it my life aspiration to succeed in academics in the honor of my family-- a decision made by me.

UC PIQ #6: Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom. (350 words max)

Understanding the past helps us make better choices in today’s society. History provides us with the views of people and politics, the ethnic origin of people, and much more. At the base of all history, there is an intensive culmination of research which hopes to address or bring light to a story.

My passion for history began while digging deep into own family’s story, researching the history of Latin America, and the origins of the city I was raised in.

For example, when I first saw my favorite show Avatar The Last Airbender, I spent hours researching the mythology of the show which in the process made me learn about the philosophy of China: daoism, Confucius, and the mandate of heaven. Anything can be put within a historical framework to understand the context; every decision, tv show, and law has a history and that is exactly what I love. History forces us to take into account the voices of the past before we can attempt to plan for the future.

History has helped me become a more effective writer for the school paper. It has made me think like a attorney, revisiting old cases, and writing up a winning argument in a mock trial. Thinking like a historian has helped me make sense of the current political climate and motivated me to help start Students For Liberty, at my school’s campus where political ideologies are shared respectfully.

Learning, about history drives my inquisitive nature — I demonstrated this desire by volunteering at a local museum to learn more about the origins of my community in Carson. Ultimately, learning about the Dominguez family who established the Harbor Area of LA.

In terms of academics and performance, I have passed both of my history AP exams in World and U.S. history — being the 2nd person in my school’s history to do so. Studying history in highschool has nurtured my love for social science, which I hope to continue in college and throughout my life.

Ever since I was little, I have possessed a unique fascination for nature and the way it interacts with itself. As I sat in the prickly seats of old tour buses and the bilingual tour guide has silenced himself for the dozens of passengers that have closed their curtains and fallen into deep slumber, I would keep my eyes glued to the window, waiting to catch a glimpse of wild animals and admiring the beautiful scenery that mother nature had pieced together. At Outdoor Science Camp, while most of my friends were fixated on socializing and games, I was obsessed with finding every organism in the book. Nothing else caught my attention quite like ecology.

As high school dragged on and the relentless responsibilities, assignments, and tests washed away the thrill of learning, ecology was one interest that withstood the turmoil. At the end of a draining day, I would always enjoy relaxing to articles detailing newly discovered species or relationships between species.

This past summer, I was able to further this interest when a unique opportunity to volunteer abroad caught my eye. Flying over to the beautiful tropical shorelines of the Dominican Republic, I was able to dive into the frontlines of the battle against climate change, dwindling populations, and habitat destruction brought about by mankind, and I enjoyed every moment of it.

While everyone was obviously ecstatic about snorkeling in the crystal blue waters, only I was able to retain that same excitement about trekking through knee thick mud and mosquito infested forests to replant mangrove trees. While tracking animal populations, my heart leaped at the sight of every new species that swam right in front of my eyes. Even when it came to the dirty work of building structures to rebuild coral and picking up trash along the beach, I always found myself leading the pack, eager to start and do the most.

From this experience, I realized that pursuing the field of ecology was what I could picture myself doing far into the future, and this was how I was going to impact the world.

UC PIQ #7: What have you done to make your school or your community a better place? (350 words max)

Originally I saw volunteer work as a nuisance. I felt that it was an unnecessary "requirement" for college. I felt that someone decided to do volunteer work while in high school and now it has become the norm and is essentially required for college. Once I began to get involved, however, I found a true appreciation for the work I was doing.

I loved helping people and, as always, wanted to challenge myself. I worked at the Bellflower Volunteer center and tutored kids every day available, as well as helping out with large special events put on by the city. I then joined Key Club and made it my mission to attend every single event no matter what; even going to the lengths to walk for 4 hours starting at 5 in the morning (it was still dark outside) for a 2-hour beach clean up. I then became Service Event Coordinator and also made it my mission to have an event every week, while attending all of them, while still working at the Volunteer Center. I also started a tutoring program in math at my school as I really enjoy helping my peers academically.

It always warmed my heart to see fellow ninjas( our division mascot) at events I had planned, friends and neighbors at Bellflower events, and CSF members at tutoring.I am always willing to help people with anything. If someone needs my help I will stop whatever I am doing to help in any way that I can. Lending a helping hand is an important part of our society; however, a helping hand cannot do anything if the other hand does not reach for it as well. We need to be able to help ourselves first before others can help us. I tried to create a community where I could help people, but also people could help themselves so that there is no reason for anyone to not be able to achieve their goals and aspirations.

Throughout my childhood, the phrases “get good grades” and “make money” constantly harassed my every waking moment. Life seemed pointless, a never-ending cycle of trying to make more money to create artificial happiness. However, through partaking in my middle school’s ASB, I discovered my love for helping others, and I realized that I wanted to make my life about changing the world and leaving behind a better future for the generations to come.

In an attempt to live up to this philosophy, I have performed hundreds of hours of community service. From volunteering at a senior home to distributing food to the homeless, there is no doubt that I have made a substantial impact on those around me.

Despite all this, my most significant contributions are the ones that take place every day and are often undocumented. Picking up trash, staying long after my job is complete to help other groups, or even saying, “Thank you. Have a nice day,” to anyone who has provided a service for me are just a few examples. While they seem insignificant, these small actions add up.

However, above all, my biggest contribution is building meaningful connections with the people around me and making sure they realize how special and important they are to me and everyone else. In nurturing those who are less experienced, assisting those who are struggling with their emotions or their studies, and inspiring those who have untapped potential, I am not merely applying a band-aid on a wound, but elevating a whole community around me to tackle and prevent ailments the next decades will bring.

Years from now, I will likely have forgotten about my modest academic achievements. However, the memories of seeing someone I had mentored blossom into a strong leader and the smiles and laughter of someone I’ve helped battle through depression will forever be ingrained in my mind.

Serving food at school carnivals, embellishing the local marsh, tutoring students after school, and discharging patients at my local hospital were some of the ways I actively supported my city. However, a distinct way of being engaged in my community involved being selected for the Youth Development Program last summer. This organization works with the Torrance Refinery and selects thirty out of hundreds of applicants. The first week of this program involved activities that trained students for college and eventually their careers by making them adept in communication, leadership, and teamwork skills. For the next four weeks, students were assigned a specific job around the City of Torrance and Torrance Unified School District (TUSD).

I was placed in the TUSD Information Technology Department, along with six other students, and we essentially helped deal with technology-based issues around the district. Even though my professional desire incorporates biology and chemistry, I had a compelling interest and math and technology. I gave back to my community by utilizing the technological skills I gained at work. My colleagues and I traveled daily to several schools around the district and assisted in technological advancements: testing network ports and preparing schools for newer phones, imaging and updating new laptops and desktops, and arranging and setting up new computer labs and Chrome book carts.

Today, many people globally use technological and visual aids to assist their education. My summer job also allowed me to make a difference in the education of others. With the faster internet, newer telephones and computers, teachers could instruct more efficiently and students can be educated more effectively, thus improving their academic performance in the future. This program helped me a lot by boosting my teamwork and leadership skills, which will be extremely valuable as I will be pursuing many president/vice-president positions in my senior year. However, this program has allowed me to make a stronger impact on other people rather than myself; I feel delighted that my work in summer will be beneficial to twenty-thousand students across Torrance.

UC PIQ #8: Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California? (350 words max)

In 2011, I started at a newly built school spanning sixth to twelfth grade. The school’s inception was not the greatest with gang culture and issues plaguing the school and nearby community. From this moment I knew wanted to make a change, improving the school and local community.

For example, two years ago a bicyclist was crushed by a container truck across the street from my school, several peers of mine and I advocated for a bike lane to get installed on the street to protect cyclists from the busy traffic. I worked day and night for three weeks using my connection with the city’s public works director to meet with city officials and make a change. I looked for solutions and ways to improve my community and lead the charge to better our street. When we met with city officials they agreed and ultimately approved our bike lane proposal. This civic action started with a group of three concerned high school students, in which I helped facilitate the conversations resulting into a bike lane project, that will be built the summer of 2018 after I graduate high school. Ultimately helping solve an issue in my community.

Using my influence as part of the Associated Student Body I advocated for a new medical academy on my school’s campus to address the growing interest in medicine and health careers of many students at my school. While I am not personally interested in a health related field, I recognized that many students at my school did and teachers agreed. I came in as an intermediary, who because of my position in ASB was also a member of my School’s Shared Leadership Council (SLC), through these means I motivated other ASB officers to support the academy’s inception and after a grueling amount of meetings in which we went through logistics the academy was approved for the benefit of students.

I am a student who will attend a UC pursuing my passions in journalism, education, and history; while being an involved student making the campus a better place than when I first arrived.

Rather than relying on pure intellect, I choose to excel through continual self-improvement, my ability to overpower obstacles, and an unrelenting force of determination. There are thousands of students smarter than me, students with better test scores, students with more volunteer hours, and quite possibly, a more socially acceptable sense of humor. I can assert, however, that my determination and ambition is hard to match.

I am willing to look in the face of the impossible without fear; in fact, the only emotion flowing through my body would be excitement. There are thousands of intelligent students, however many are unable or are unwilling to utilize their full potential. Although not a genius, I have shown my ability to improve drastically in capability over time.

At some point in my middle school career I was not technically supposed to still be enrolled because my grades were too low; now I'm on track to be valedictorian of my class. I am willing to do whatever it takes to meet my goal; if there were a service event across the country I would be willing to walk the entire way; if I could take a million AP's I would. I understand that it is a big jump to go from Bellflower High School to a UC in terms of academic difficulty; however, that is part of the excitement. I am not afraid of failure, it does nothing but make me stronger. Am I capable of making a jump of such a magnitude? It is not my judgment to make; I am only here to try.

The spin-the-wheel slows down and eventually stops at ‘try again next time’. That is, until I secretly push it one slot over to ‘princess tiara’. As the child hurries away to the next carnival game with the tiara in her hair, her mom turns back at me with a warm smile and mouths the words “thank you”. Seeing genuine happiness in the people of my community while volunteering at events such as my school carnival always remind me why I love my community so much.

I hold a lot of pride in how I’ve become a prominent figure in my community. From volunteering at festivals for my local elementary school to becoming employed by the City of American Canyon Parks and Recreation Department, I relish being in the hub of the community. I love our annual Fourth of July parades and Easter egg hunts, where I am stopped every 15 minutes to catch up with the crazy kids I worked with at summer camp or even just with the staff I’ve met from school. Growing up and connecting with such a diverse community is and will always be a large part of who I am. From kindergarten up until my senior year of high school, both my small community and I as an individual have grown immensely. By volunteering at local events, connecting with the people of my community, and finally getting employed by my city, I know that I have contributed to the successful growth of my community.

Although I really love my community here in the small town of American Canyon, I cannot help but think of the other great communities that I can potentially be a part of as well. I believe that by going to the University of California, I will be able to thrive in the liveliness of the communities that the campuses are well-known for. A major contribution I believe that I can bring to the University of California is integrating, being involved in, and building the school’s community so that both I and the school can grow together for each other.

What can you learn from these UC Berkeley essays?

If you want to get into UC Berkeley in 2022, you need to write great essays that help make you stand out. From these 18 Berkeley essays that worked, here are some takeaways:

  • Use specific examples of places and events (name them) ( #8 , #17 )
  • Tell a story ( #6 , #18 , #7 )
  • Demonstrate your background, identity, or culture ( #3 , #15 , #4 )

If you enjoyed these UC Berkeley essays, you'll also like reading our top UCLA essays that worked. They answer the same PIQ prompts, but quite differently.

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making my community a better place essay

Princeton Admitted Essay

People love to ask why. Why do you wear a turban? Why do you have long hair? Why are you playing a guitar with only 3 strings and watching TV at 3 A.M.—where did you get that cat? Why won’t you go back to your country, you terrorist? My answer is... uncomfortable. Many truths of the world are uncomfortable...

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Her baking is not confined to an amalgamation of sugar, butter, and flour. It's an outstretched hand, an open invitation, a makeshift bridge thrown across the divides of age and culture. Thanks to Buni, the reason I bake has evolved. What started as stress relief is now a lifeline to my heritage, a language that allows me to communicate with my family in ways my tongue cannot. By rolling dough for saratele and crushing walnuts for cornulete, my baking speaks more fluently to my Romanian heritage than my broken Romanian ever could....

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A cow gave birth and I watched. Staring from the window of our stopped car, I experienced two beginnings that day: the small bovine life and my future. Both emerged when I was only 10 years old and cruising along the twisting roads of rural Maryland...

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making my community a better place essay

UC PIQ: What have you done to make your school or your community a better place? | Sabria

making my community a better place essay

Sabria , University of Pennsylvania Class of 2023

What have you done to make your school or your community a better place .

Overtime, I learned that Armani wants to be spoken to as my friend; she wants badly to be accepted. Greg wants to be challenged academically; he wants to be a scholar. My cousin, Zechariah needs constant affection and encouragement; his dad passed away at his peewee football game two weeks ago. Every Saturday morning, at Emanyatta, I work with these children. For African American children in my community, traditional school contributes to cultural genocide. Moreover, a stigma has been festering that college might as well be on the moon if you are not an athlete; I reject this mentality and I am working hard to disprove this stereotype that is infiltrating the minds of my young Black peers.

Emanyatta derives its name from the warrior training camp of the Maassai tribe from Southern Kenya, and I see myself in the warriors that we are conditioning each week. This program was designed to provide elementary school students with additional academic support; however, for myself and many of the kids I work with, the group’s warm environment is monumental and serves as a second home. I know from my own experience, pursuing your passion in my community is a battle. Some of my duties consist of teaching second grade “Read Aloud, Read Proud,” which allows students to practice reading orally, leading third grade’s “Solve It Saturday,” a 30 minute math and critical thinking workshop, and bonding with the kids during “My Earth, My Worth,” a gardening workshop that promotes healthy eating. Seeing the students’ eyes light up each week as I work with them dispels the myth that Black children cannot learn; hearing their choral response disproves the stereotypes that Black children do not listen; feeling their collaborative energy dismantles the notion that Black children will not behave.

I know many of the kids outside of the program, and I know that having a surplus of young volunteers like myself would provide valuable mentorship. My success will come from rewriting the narrative for African American youth in my community, and through encouraging them to pursue higher education.

University of Pennsylvania 2023

About the author 🎓, major: political science, minors: consumer psychology and africana studies, accepted universities: stanford university, georgetown university, bowdoin college, davidson college, emory university, saint mary\'s college of california, santa clara university, university of miami, vassar college, university of southern california, university of california berkeley, university of california los angeles, university of california san diego, university of california davis, howard university, spelman college, hometown: bay area, california, more essays, common app essays →, harvard essays →, mit essays →, princeton essays →, stanford essays →, yale essays →, common application essay: describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve | dyllen.

Describe a problem you’ve solved or a problem you’d like to solve. It can be an intellectual challenge, a research query, an ethical dilemma –

making my community a better place essay

Stanford Supplemental Essay: Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you genuinely excited about learning | Dyllen

The Stanford community is deeply curious and driven to learn in and out of the classroom. Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you

Stanford Supplemental Essay: Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you | Dyllen

Virtually all of Stanford’s undergraduates live on campus. Write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your

Stanford Supplemental Essay: Tell us about something that is meaningful to you and why | Dyllen

Tell us about something that is meaningful to you and why The day’s memories flash through my mind as I lie in bed. The piano

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making my community a better place essay

Posted August 13, 2012

making my community a better place essay

25 Tips for Making Your Neighborhood Better

Jay Walljasper's guide to changing the world on your own block

making my community a better place essay

The neighborhood is the basic building block of human civilization, whether in a big city, small town or suburban community. It’s also the place where you can have the most influence in making a better world. Jay Walljasper, Senior Fellow at OTC and Project for Public Spaces and author of The Great Neighborhood Book , has studied neighborhoods around the world and come up with this list of how to make your community more livable and lovable.

These suggestions are focused on strengthening the sense of community and spirit of the commons by providing people with ways to come together as friends, neighbors and citizens. That creates a firm foundation that enables a neighborhood to solve problems and seize opportunities.

This is drawn from a presentation he gives regularly to community, civic, academic, professional and business groups. For more information, see “Jay Walljasper.com”:http://jaywalljasper.com/.

1. Give people a place to hang-out

2. Give people something to see

3. Give people something to do

4. Give people a place to sit down

5. Give people a safe, comfortable place to walk

6. Give people a safe, comfortable place to bike

7. Give people reliable, comfortable public transportation

8. Make the streets safe

9. Make the streets safe—not just from crime but from traffic

10. Remember the streets belong to everyone—not just motorists

11. Don’t forget about the needs of older neighbors

12. Don’t forget about the needs of kids

13. Let your community go to the dogs

14. Reclaim front yards as social spaces

15. Remember the best neighborhoods, even in big cities, feel like villages

16. Plan for winter weather as well as sunny, warm days

17. Don’t fear density—people enjoy being around other people

18. Don’t give up hope—great changes are possible when neighbors get together

19. Build on what’s good in your community to make things even better

20. Remember the power of the commons: people working together for the benefit of everyone

21. Never underestimate the power of a shared meal to move people into action

22. Start with small steps—like planting flowers

23. Become a community booster, watchdog, patriot

24. Learn from other neighborhoods in your town and around the world

25. Take the time to have fun and enjoy what’s already great about your neighborhood

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Home — Application Essay — National Universities — Making The World A Better Place: College Admission Essay

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Making The World A Better Place: College Admission Essay

  • University: Cornell University

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Published: Nov 1, 2021

Words: 645 | Pages: 1 | 4 min read

When Elon Musk questioned 'what's really going to have an important impact on the future of humanity as a whole?', these are the four areas that came to my mind: genetic engineering, nanoscience, sustainable development, and extraterrestrial exploration. Through a major in Biomedical Engineering and minors in Aerospace Engineering and Sustainable Energy Systems at Cornell, I aspire to have a massive and positive impact on our world.

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'Disease' can deprive us of the blessings of life: being independent, doing what we love, and pursuing happiness. Holding my grandmother’s hand every time she wanted to go out of the room or trying to understand what she was murmuring was really dismaying, but medicine made it possible for her to strive for a better life. Though healthcare has a vast sphere, what steered me towards biomedical engineering is the considerable magnitude of impact a single advancement can make.

I was introduced to synthetic biology and genetic engineering at the National STEM School, where I investigated gene editing and epigenetics. Inspired by my mentor, I submitted a video in Khan Academy's Breakthrough Junior Challenge explaining how genetic engineering could stop and possibly reverse aging. The investigation was quite demanding as this was a relatively new concept; however, the unlimited prospects of developing new treatments drew me towards this career. Biomedical engineering research is exactly in line with my aims at the intersection of engineering and medicine. Therefore, I was ecstatic when I secured a placement in the research project at the Centre of Applied Molecular Biology, where I practically performed the experiment that I had only read about in books. I used micropipettes, performed gel electrophoresis and sequenced DNA to investigate the genetics behind asthma in Pakistan’s population. I aspire to find diagnostic tests and curative procedures for such ailments that affect mankind.

Cornell encircles a community of people who share my passion for making the world a better place. Mixing and mingling, on a daily basis, with people from various cultural and intellectual backgrounds will invigorate creativity and ingenuity in me that I would apply to engineer technology. Moreover, I can see myself contributing my unique perspectives to various student groups like Cancer Brainstorming Club. At Cornell, I will explore new vistas in the Cosgrove Laboratory developing systems bioengineering approaches to study the stem cell function and tissue regeneration in aging patients.

With fossil fuel predicted to be completely depleted by 2088 and the world population projected to reach a massive 11.2 billion by 2100, exhaustion of Earth’s natural supplies is an alarming situation. Recently, I measured the ambient air quality of Lahore and its outskirts and found the US AQI to be extremely hazardous at 587. With this data in my mind, I believe that augmenting our settlements to other planets is the ultimate solution to yet another world war on resources. When I volunteered at a school in a nearby village that was virtually cut off from electricity and clean water due to hours of load-shedding, I witnessed the magnitude of Pakistan’s energy and water crisis and pledged to bring a solution. So when my chemistry teacher suggested me to explore nanoscience in my pursuits for a sustainable future my curiosity rose. The prospect of using nanotubes at a larger scale to intrigues me, specifically how carbon nanowires can increase the efficiency of renewable energy sources like solar cells. As I delve deeper into my research, I surmise: to what extent can nanoscience reduce energy loses at a global level?

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These are the type of questions that Cornell’s undergraduate research opportunities would allow me to answer. Cornell will equip me with a strong foundation in both STEM and the liberal arts, which will be a melting pot for inspiring innovation. Whether I am developing a new spacecraft design, finding a cure for cancer or supporting conservation of the Amazon, my deepest commitment as a scientist and engineer is to humanity.  

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How to Make Your School a Better Place

Last Updated: April 20, 2024 Fact Checked

This article was co-authored by Alicia Oglesby . Alicia Oglesby is a Professional School Counselor and the Director of School and College Counseling at Bishop McNamara High School outside of Washington DC. With over ten years of experience in counseling, Alicia specializes in academic advising, social-emotional skills, and career counseling. Alicia holds a BS in Psychology from Howard University and a Master’s in Clinical Counseling and Applied Psychology from Chestnut Hill College. She also studied Race and Mental Health at Virginia Tech. Alicia holds Professional School Counseling Certifications in both Washington DC and Pennsylvania. She has created a college counseling program in its entirety and developed five programs focused on application workshops, parent information workshops, essay writing collaborative, peer-reviewed application activities, and financial aid literacy events. There are 10 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 241,344 times.

Making your school a better place will make everyone around you happier and will get you more pumped to go every day. In addition, a better atmosphere will also make you more productive. As a student, you can help other students and maintain a positive attitude and take the lead when it comes to promoting improvements in the school. As a faculty member or teacher, there are other strategies that you can use to create a better working environment. Whether you're a student, faculty member, or teacher, you should always be thinking of ways to make your school a better place.

Helping Other Students

Step 1 Stand up to bullies.

  • When you see someone getting bullied you can say something like “Hey, that's not funny at all. Stop bullying her.”
  • Or you could say, “Cut it out. They didn't do anything to you, stop being mean to them.”
  • You can also ask the bully something like, "How would you like it if someone did that to you? Do you think it's fun to be humiliated?"

Step 2 Try to resolve conflicts between other kids.

  • For example, if someone was spreading rumors about someone else, you could say something like, "The only reason Jessica is yelling is because of the rumor you spread, Jack. I think instead of fighting you both should talk about it. Why did you start the rumor, Jack?"

Step 3 Spread a positive attitude.

  • For example, if someone is complaining about how hard physics is, you can say something like “Sure, it's hard, but just imagine how much this is going to prepare us for college. It's better to learn it now than to struggle with it later.”

Step 4 Tutor other students if you can.

  • When students struggle in school, there's a chance that they can lash out and disrupt learning for everyone. [4] X Trustworthy Source American Psychological Association Leading scientific and professional organization of licensed psychologists Go to source

Step 5 Make friends with students that are lonely.

  • If you notice that a student that's sitting alone at lunch, walk up to them and say something like, "Hey, you're in my math class. Mind if I sit with you for lunch?"
  • If you notice a student who doesn't have many friends, walk up to them and ask them "What are you doing this Saturday? I'm going to play basketball. Want to come along?"

Step 6 Communicate serious issues with teachers and administration.

  • For example, if your friend is struggling with getting bullied and the bullies won't stop, report it to the principal before something more serious occurs.

Joseph Meyer

Joseph Meyer

Support social justice practices in your school. Use data to explore social justice issues. Analyze who's enrolling in classes at school by factors like race and gender to identify potential inequalities. Discuss the implications of these findings with others and brainstorm solutions to promote equity.

Participating at School

Step 1 Run for student...

  • Once you become a member of student government, you can raise money for better school facilities or start new clubs that promote positivity.

Step 2 Become a leader at school.

  • You can become a team captain, a club leader, or just be a person that other students look up to.
  • To be a good leader, you need to be responsible, reliable, and willing to collaborate. The best leaders are also fun, know how to have a good time, and don't take themselves too seriously.

Step 3 Support a sport at school.

  • You can go up to students and say something like "Hey, you going to the game this Friday? We are facing our rivals, you should definitely go."

Step 4 Participate in the arts.

  • If there is ever a performance or art show, you should let other students know by saying something like, "You gotta make it out to the art show this Thursday. Everyone from Ms. Kenney's class is going to be displaying their best works."

Step 5 Pick up trash...

Making the School Better as Faculty or Staff

Step 1 Encourage a collaborative atmosphere.

  • You can say something like "Hey a couple of teachers and I are planning on going to Joe's Crab Shack this Friday. Are you interested in coming with us?"

Build strong connections with your fellow teachers. A supportive network of colleagues is essential. They can provide valuable insights, offer encouragement during tough times, and create a sense of community – all crucial for a fulfilling teaching career.

Step 3 Speak positively about what's going on at your school.

  • For instance, if there is construction happening in the school you can say something like, "Well at least we'll have a bigger and better school once it's done!"

Step 4 Give the students the ability to make meaningful change.

  • You can inspire students by saying something like, "I want the students to have control over where the Poet Society goes. I want to give you the power to dictate what the club will do in the future, and I have full confidence in you."

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  • ↑ https://kidshealth.org/en/kids/bullies.html
  • ↑ https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/conflict-resolution-skills.htm
  • ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/positive-mindset/
  • ↑ https://www.apa.org/monitor/2022/10/mental-health-campus-care
  • ↑ https://www.edutopia.org/blog/school-community-collaboration-brendan-okeefe
  • ↑ https://www.apa.org/about/governance/bylaws/rules-110
  • ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/leadership-activities/
  • ↑ https://www.apa.org/topics/sport-rehabilitation/psychologists
  • ↑ https://hbr.org/2022/10/the-power-of-work-friends
  • ↑ https://positivepsychology.com/what-is-positive-psychology-definition/

About This Article

Alicia Oglesby

You can make your school a better place by getting more involved and helping out your fellow students. Try running for student government if your school has one so you can make changes to improve your school, such as raising money to improve facilities or starting up a new club. You could also get involved with a sports program by playing on the team or promoting them at school. For example, you could raise the school spirit by putting on face paint and cheering loudly at the games. To help out your classmates, try to resolve conflicts that you see arise between them and stand up to any kids you see bullying other kids. You’ll create a more positive environment, which will make your school a better place for you, your teachers, and your peers. For tips about how to make friends with students that are lonely, keep reading! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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How to Make the World a Better Place Essay

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Topic: The Role of Education for A Better and Fairer Future

“Real education enhances the dignity of a human being and increases his or her self-respect. If only the real sense of education could be realized by each individual and carried forward in every field of human activity, the world will be so much a better place to live in.” D.R A.P.J. Abdul Kalam

Much has been written about education, its importance and how the current system of education is not helping us get anywhere. So, to talk about this matter of significant value we need to understand what it truly means. Education is a process that doesn’t only facilitate learning, but above all focuses on the acquisition of knowledge and skills hoping, to change our beliefs and habits for the better.

The world we live in has no shortage of problems. These problems are complex, pervasive, and affect all of us. We all have legitimate ambitions for a happier, fairer and more humane life. Addressing these issues represents a major challenge that calls upon the active and collaborative effort of all sectors of society and a clear awareness of the central role of education.

Since the beginning of the history of man itself, the role of education has been unclear and in times like ours, its function has remained ambiguous. See when we talk about education we mainly observe that there are people divided on what it means. Some who believe that knowledge is more important while others who would argue that No, learning is the more important one. Engaged in these futile arguments we forget that we’re only seeing one side of the story, one piece of the puzzle. Education requires a perfect balance of both, learning and knowledge. A mix of the rigid and the flexible, the rigidity of concrete fact and the flexibility of creative imagination. A Yin and Yang if I would say. In fights like these, we have yet again proved the impossible (in a sinister way that is) we’ve managed to divide ourselves on another level.

These arguments have arisen over the current education system, dividing us into two groups, the people who support it, mainly teachers and the people who are against it, the students. We, as students need to realize the importance of time management for coping with huge amounts of portion and the parents and teachers should not pressure the students so much. And above all we all need to realize that true learning doesn’t only happen in the classroom.

Riddle me this, if we didn’t argue as much as we do and try to convince the other side to see the sense in ours, but instead put in an effort in working together, realizing that we all have our differences, but united on the simple fact that we’re all human, where do you think we would be right now?

Making the World a Better Place

Every individual’s life is influenced by the choices they make. When we’re concerned about matters like food, survival, shelter and other resources we’re making the most basic choices ever. Education helps us to make better choices. Education is a constructive way to provide answers to the questions we look for. It fulfills our curiosity, helping us learn. Consequently, we have a deeper understanding of the world around us than we did before. This deep understanding enables us to dive deeper, to be fearless and to ask questions that have never been asked before. That is the single, most fundamental reason we make progress.

I mean, think about it, we live in the most revolutionary period of man. Why? It’s mainly because education and facts are available to a large section of our society. When we look back at the history of man, we realize something We’ve come a long way, haven’t we?

In the long run, standards of living are determined by productivity. Without education, people are limited to poorly paid manual labor or even subsistence agriculture. Just to work in a modern factory today, you must be literate and numerate. Even agriculture today requires understanding which seed varieties to choose and how and when to apply water, fertilizer, and pesticides.

Furthermore, education is vital to understanding important life decisions such as understanding the importance of family planning and human life we all share. Sure, there are a lot of problems, but we can solve them, together.

We must understand that the importance of education cannot be measured. Its value is unmatchable. Without it stems from ignorance, frustration, anger, and demise. With it, solutions, alternatives, and new ideas can be brought forth to further improve the evolution of mankind. With each generation, we are taking one step forward in a direction that will further address world issues such as environmental awareness, famine, disease, and war. Education can help immensely in achieving this seemingly utopian future. From hunters and gatherers to people who can theorize how the universe works, building a peaceful, efficient, and growing species is all based on the evolution of our education. There is no purpose nobler than putting mind over matter and using our brain for the betterment of everyone.

Moreover, when we get educated we influence others in our life, directly or indirectly. We all know a man is a social being and craves the approval of her/his fellow beings. This has developed a sort of herd mentality and while it is true that we should “break the mold” and nothing ever good came from the following someone, we need to be aware what that mold is and how to break it. That and so much more can be achieved by education. It is our saving grace, which will lead us all to a brighter and bolder future.

And if history is any indicator, our present has been influenced by the choices of the past. And despite all its problems, modern society has hope and potential to grow.

So, let’s not squander this opportunity given to us by our forefathers and make a change in our demeanor for the better. One thing that we must do and do well is balance societal goals (curing diseases, building things, world peace, etc.) with the pursuit of material wealth. We need both; but, of course, traditionally people are too concerned with the latter. We need to create a society where we will be able to achieve this balance. For only then will we truly understand the importance of education because it isn’t a big fat paycheck or a promotion you get from your senior, it’s more than that.

Education is our passport for tomorrow, a better tomorrow.

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This Mom's Confessions

How to Make Your Community a Better Place to Live

Filed Under: BLOG , Infographic Tagged With: Community Advice

During these tough times, having a good community surrounding you is more important than ever. However, sometimes it takes putting in some work to make our area better and a nicer place to live. While it will look different for everyone, there’s something everyone can do to improve the area they call home or community investing.

This can be especially important when trying to teach kids to be generous and what effects there are by giving back. Not only does your family benefit from seeing you take action to make a difference, but you also benefit by being able to watch your children follow in your footsteps.

What is Community Investing? 

Community investing looks different for everyone. The idea of investing as a whole is to contribute to a cause with the goal of earning a return. You may have heard the terms “stock investing” or “bond investing”. It’s very similar. The difference lies in what you choose to invest in. Rather than contributing to a stock or bond, you contribute something to a local organization.

reinvest-rental-earnings-1

COMMUNITY INVESTING – Ways You Can Invest in Your Community

From making monetary donations to creating a community garden, there are many ways to get involved in this type of way. Here are some ways you can c ontribute to your local community to make a difference. 

Make Community Better Place

Create a Garden for Your Community

Community gardens are a great way for people to come together and bond over a similar interest. It also provides food for those who may be struggling or even those who prefer some fresh garden tomatoes.  Plus there are also other things to do for your neighbors, such as this list here to help out.

Purchase Real Estate in Lower-income Areas

This can be costly in some regards, but well worth it. The US Department of Housing and Urban Development has set up programs to assist property owners in providing affordable housing. If you’ve considered investing in real estate, this is a great way to give back and help those who would benefit from the assistance. 

Make Monetary Contributions

Many charities benefit greatly from receiving monetary contributions. These charities could be anything from the local animal shelter to an environmental charity. It could also mean writing up a check for a donation, or simply supporting your local business by purchasing their products rather than at a larger retail store. There are many ways to monetarily support local organizations, all of which are greatly appreciated. 

reinvest-rental-earnings-2

Perform Walking Audits with Your Family

Walking audits are a great way to get involved and help those with different abilities. The goal of a walking audit is to find areas in the community that could be improved. Anyone can perform a walking audit, but it’s best if you invite a local leader as well as a variety of people with different abilities and at different ages. This will help you see where areas can be improved to be safe for everyone in your community. 

There are many other ways you can help your community thrive, sometimes it just takes thinking outside the box. Going out and talking with others about local issues can give you a better idea of where the need is greatest.

making my community a better place essay

About Janine

Janine is a published author of the books, The Mother of All Meltdowns and Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee. She has been featured on The Huffington Post, Mamapedia, Today Parenting Team and SheKnows. She also runs her own graphic design company at J9 Designs .

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  1. How to Write the "Make Community a Better Place" UC Essay

    Defining "Community". Demonstrating Your Values. The University of California system requires you to answer four out of eight essay prompts. The seventh University of California prompt asks, "What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?". For a lot of people, a key to unlocking this essay is to think about ...

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  3. How to Write the Community Essay + Examples 2023-24

    Kaylen is an experienced writer/translator whose work has been featured in Los Angeles Review, Hybrid, San Francisco Bay Guardian, France Today, and Honolulu Weekly, among others. How to write the community essay for college applications in 2023-24. Our experts present community essay examples and analysis.

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    UC Example Essay #7. Prompt 3: Greatest Talent or Skill. UC Example Essay #8: "The Art Girl". Prompt 4: Significant Opportunity or Barrier. UC Example Essay #9. UC Example Essay #10. UC Example Essay #11: "Two Truths, One Lie". UC Example Essay #12: Prompt 5: Overcoming a Challenge.

  5. How To Answer UC Personal Insight Prompt 7: Community

    The UC admissions essay prompt, "What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?" requires a thorough understanding in order to craft a successful essay. In this section, we will explore how to interpret the prompt, discuss why it is important, and highlight what admissions officers are looking for in your response.

  6. How to Write a Community Supplemental Essay (with Examples)

    Step 2: Brainstorm communities you're involved in. If you're writing a Community essay that asks you to discuss a community you belong to, then your next step will be brainstorming all of your options. As you brainstorm, keep a running list. Your list can include all kinds of communities you're involved in.

  7. Writing UC Prompt 7 Tips: Improving Your Community Essay

    If you found this article helpful, check out the rest of our deconstructed UC Prompts below: UC Essay Prompts Explained. Writing UC Prompt 1 Tips: Leadership Experience Writing UC Prompt 2 Tips: Your Creative Side. Writing UC Prompt 3 Tips: Greatest Talent. Writing UC Prompt 4 Tips: Educational Experiences Writing UC Prompt 5 Tips: Significant ...

  8. Writing a College Essay About Community and Examples

    Toot your horn. At the heart of it, a college essay about community is asking you to toot your own horn…at least a little. As a member of a community, you need to be offering something to the group, not just benefitting. As we've just discussed, showing this reciprocity illustrates your ability to be a contributing part of a larger community.

  9. How to Write the MIT "Community" Essay

    A community is defined broadly and includes, but is not limited to, one or more of the following: Your nuclear or extended family. Clubs and teams that you are a member of. The street or neighborhood where you live. A place where you work. A religious community or house of worship. A racial or ethnic group.

  10. UC Essay Example: Personal Insight Question #7

    This was my chance to learn about the science behind insomnia—especially about its effects on our overall wellness—to better understand my friend's tragic situation. My first duty was patient recruitment through marketing our clinical study to the community, but soon transitioned to data analysis and treatment.

  11. The Community Essay for the Common App Supplements

    Many college applications require supplemental essays. A common supplementary question asks you to consider and write about a community to which you belong. The definition of community is open to interpretation and can be difficult to pin down. We each belong to a wide variety of communities ranging from our family and friend groups to being ...

  12. How to Write a Great Community Service Essay

    Step 6: Discuss What You Learned. One of the final things to include in your essay should be the impact that your community service had on you. You can discuss skills you learned, such as carpentry, public speaking, animal care, or another skill. You can also talk about how you changed personally.

  13. 18 UC Berkeley Essay Examples that Worked (2023)

    Prompt #1: Leadership Experience. UC Berkeley Example Essay #1. Prompt #2: Creative Side. UC Berkeley Example Essay #2. Prompt #3: Greatest Talent or Skill. UC Berkeley Example Essay #3: Clammy Hands. UC Berkeley Example Essay #4: Memory. Prompt #4: Educational Opportunity or Barrier.

  14. How to Make Your Community Better Essay

    Page: 1. This essay sample was donated by a student to help the academic community. Papers provided by EduBirdie writers usually outdo students' samples. Cite this essay. Download. Gordon B. Hinckley once said, "Some of our finest work comes through service to others". Fill in generic info. There are many opportunities for service in ...

  15. UC PIQ: What have you done to make your school or your community a

    Some of my duties consist of teaching second grade "Read Aloud, Read Proud," which allows students to practice reading orally, leading third grade's "Solve It Saturday," a 30 minute math and critical thinking workshop, and bonding with the kids during "My Earth, My Worth," a gardening workshop that promotes healthy eating.

  16. 25 Tips for Making Your Neighborhood Better

    18. Don't give up hope—great changes are possible when neighbors get together. 19. Build on what's good in your community to make things even better. 20. Remember the power of the commons: people working together for the benefit of everyone. 21. Never underestimate the power of a shared meal to move people into action. 22.

  17. My Contributions to Make My Community a Better Place

    What have you done to make your school or community a better place? Philosophers such as Aristotle and Plato pointed out that education is central to the moral fulfilment of individuals and the well-being of the society in which they live. Regarding this idea, I returned to Korea wanting to...

  18. Making The World A Better Place: College Admission Essay

    Cornell encircles a community of people who share my passion for making the world a better place. Mixing and mingling, on a daily basis, with people from various cultural and intellectual backgrounds will invigorate creativity and ingenuity in me that I would apply to engineer technology. Moreover, I can see myself contributing my unique ...

  19. 3 Ways to Make Your School a Better Place

    4. Participate in the arts. Another way to promote school spirit is by supporting the arts in your school. Attend plays, go to art shows, and promote artists and groups in your school. This will give students an outlet for their creativity and will make your school a better place to be.

  20. Making The World A Better Place Free Essay Example

    Another way to make the world a better place is by reducing our eco-footprint. We can start by not using single-use plastic. Instead of plastic water bottles, we can use reusable water bottles instead. A lot of the plastic goes into the ocean which kills thousands of animals and makes the water dirty. We need to use more public transportation ...

  21. How to Make the World a Better Place Essay Sample

    Education helps us to make better choices. Education is a constructive way to provide answers to the questions we look for. It fulfills our curiosity, helping us learn. Consequently, we have a deeper understanding of the world around us than we did before. This deep understanding enables us to dive deeper, to be fearless and to ask questions ...

  22. How to Make Your Community a Better Place to Live

    From making monetary donations to creating a community garden, there are many ways to get involved in this type of way. Here are some ways you can c ontribute to your local community to make a difference. Create a Garden for Your Community. Community gardens are a great way for people to come together and bond over a similar interest.

  23. A year's worth of rain plunges normally dry Dubai underwater

    A year's worth of rain unleashed immense flash flooding in Dubai Tuesday as roads turned into rivers and rushing water inundated homes and businesses. Shocking video showed the tarmac of Dubai ...