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Como fazer um personal statement perfeito

Escrever um bom personal statement (espécie de ensaio pessoal ou carta de motivação) é imprescindível para ser admitido em uma universidade norte-americana. Este momento, no entanto, costuma ser permeado por dúvidas, já que muitos não sabem ao certo o que dizer à universidade. E uma redação subaproveitada por ser determinante para a rejeição de um candidato que, mesmo tendo boas notas nos testes padronizados ( SAT e TOEFL , por exemplo), não consegue demonstrar à instituição todo o seu potencial.

Segundo Carolina Lyrio, consultora de preparação para estudos no exterior da Fundação Estudar, as redações servem para “mostrar o aluno como pessoa, além de demonstrar algumas das qualidades intangíveis que eles possam ter”. Ou seja, se o candidato tem alguma característica interessante, ou se gosta de alguma atividade específica, é bom deixar isso claro no personal statement .

Como fazer um bom personal statement para graduação

A chave por trás da resposta está na capacidade de  contar uma boa história . O estudante conta com cerca de 500 palavras para resumir um aspecto de sua vida e de como sua presença na universidade estrangeira seria valiosa. O objetivo é que essa primeira leitura sobre o estudante cause a  melhor impressão e que seja mais pessoal.

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Antes de elaborar o texto, vale ter em mente alguns aspectos importantes. Primeiramente, que esse não será o único material encaminhado na application para universidades de fora. Ou seja, também entram na lista itens como  cartas de recomendação , bem como  currículo com detalhes  profissionais e acadêmicos.

Junte-se a isso a série de informações enviadas às instituições, como o histórico acadêmico e resultado obtido em testes padronizados. Ou, em outras palavras: o aluno terá várias etapas para demonstrar aspectos de sua trajetória e personalidade, e não só o personal statement.

Para saber escrevê-lo, entretanto, não há uma fórmula exata. Um bom texto reflete quem o candidato é e seus atrativos para a instituição de ensino, com uma redação clara e concisa.

Exemplo de um bom personal statement

Foi o que a jovem carioca Larissa Gama, de 18 anos, fez. Aprovada no Bryn Mawr College , uma instituição de renome nos Estados Unidos, Larissa conta que estudou a fundo as universidades para as quais iria se candidatar e tentou unir seus interesses pessoais ao que as escolas tinham para oferecer.

Em seu p ersonal statement , ela falou de duas grandes paixões  – hipismo e balé clássico – e mostrou que a universidade oferecia programas específicos nestas áreas, sugerindo que, se aceita, poderia continuar praticando ambas atividades. Veja um trecho da redação dela (e, a seguir, sua tradução em português):

“As part of my campus life, I want to be a member of the Bi-Co Equestrian Club. I will have the chance to continue practicing this activity that is essential in my life, and even more, I will be able to get in touch with horse lovers both from Bryn Mawr and Haverford.

The university also offers dance in high levels of technique in the ballet III and optional pointe classes. Beyond ballet, I plan to adventure myself taking tap dance classes as well. I currently take part in a professional ballet company here in Rio de Janeiro, so the university support in this area is really meaningful to me. Since I want to continue my progress in dance, the opportunity to take classes in Swarthmore or in nearby studios in Philadelphia would be incredible.”

[“Como parte da minha vida no campus, quero ser um membro ativo do Bi-Co Equestrian Club. Terei a chance de continuar a praticar essa atividade que é essencial na minha vida, e até mais, poderei entrar em contato com amantes de cavalos tanto de Bryn Mawr quanto de Haverford”

“A universidade também oferece dança em níveis avançados de técnica no ballet III e aulas opcionais de ponta. Além do balé, pretendo me aventurar em aulas de sapateado também. Atualmente sou parte de uma companhia de balé profissional aqui no Rio de Janeiro, então o apoio da universidade nessa área é realmente significativo para mim. Como quero continuar meu progresso na dança, a oportunidade de fazer aulas em Swarthmore ou em estúdios próximos na Filadélfia seria incrível”]

Carolina considera ainda que a redação de Larissa conseguiu conectar bem as coisas que ela gostava de fazer no Rio de Janeiro com as oportunidades que teria em Bryn Mwar. “É uma redação forte porque apontou claramente os motivos pelos quais ela queria estudar lá”, avalia.

A melhor forma de verificar se o seu texto está no caminho certo é questionado-se: “A redação tem a minha voz? Ela conta uma história pessoal e focada ou é geral e genérica? Ela ajuda o leitor a entender quem sou eu?’

Mais um exemplo

O paulistano Lawrence Murata também fez um personal statement interessante. Aprovado em Stanford, que está sempre entre as cinco melhores instituições do mundo segundo os principais ranking acadêmicos, Lawrence usou sua redação para falar de seu relacionamento com a avó, personagem essencial em sua vida. “Ele conseguiu trazer elementos do japonês (ditados, símbolos e imagens) que ilustram a cultura do aluno, sem deixar que a redação ficasse sem graça”, explica Carolina. Confira um trecho do personal statement dele (e sua tradução em português a seguir):

“I spent every day at the hospital until she passed away, taking care of her, holding her hands, hopelessly trying to talk to her, even when she had already lost consciousness. During these months, I became more mature: a boy who truly wanted to contribute to humanity. These difficult times were “the end of the beginning” – while I gained maturity, I was also in search of happiness and of my own self. By questioning myself, I became my best self.

Some months before she passed away, when we drove her to the hospital, even though nobody had told her about the diagnosis, she knew she had little time left just by looking at our miserable faces. However, before leaving home, she said “shiawasedesu”, which means ‘I’m happy’ in Japanese.”

[“Passei todos os dias no hospital até que ela se foi, cuidando dela, segurando suas mãos, tentando sem esperanças falar com ela, mesmo quando ela já tinha perdido a consciência. Durante esses meses, fiquei mais maduro: um menino que realmente queria contribuir para a humanidade. Esses tempos difíceis foram ‘o fim do começo’ — enquanto ganhei maturidade, eu também estava em busca de felicidade e da minha própria identidade. Ao me interrogar, eu me tornei a melhor versão de mim.

Alguns meses antes dela falecer, quando a levamos ao hospital, mesmo que ninguém tivesse contado a ela sobre o diagnóstico, ela sabia que tinha pouco tempo só de olhar para nossas caras tristes. No entanto, antes de sair de casa, ela disse ‘shiawasedesu’, que significa ‘estou feliz’ em japonês”.]

Em suma, Carolina diz que a forma de verificar se o seu texto está no caminho certo é questionado-se: “A redação tem a minha voz? Ela conta uma história pessoal e focada ou é geral e genérica? Ela ajuda o leitor a entender quem sou eu? Ela está bem escrita? Flui de maneira lógica e interessante?”

Portanto, o primeiro passo para quem pretende fazer um personal statement  “perfeito” é pensar muito a respeito de si mesmo e de suas intenções. O que você verdadeiramente deseja? Do que você gosta? Como a universidade pode te ajudar a alcançar seus sonhos?

Depois de colocar suas ideias no papel, estude a fundo cada uma das instituições para as quais você deseja se candidatar e tente fazer o match entre suas vontades e o que a universidade tem a oferecer.

Como fazer um bom personal statement para pós-graduação

Assim como o processo de admissão da graduação, o sistema para pós no exterior é holístico. Ao  admission office , chegam documentos do estudante como histórico acadêmico e resultados em exames como GMAT e GRE. E, além disso, o personal statement (também chamado de “ statement of purpose ” por algumas instituições) de cada aluno em potencial.

8 dicas para escrever seu texto

Algumas indicações valem tanto para as candidaturas à graduação quanto para a pós-graduação no exterior. Ainda que se trate de uma etapa criativa, por exemplo, não significa que o personal statement não exija grande tempo de dedicação e trabalho. Por trás de uma versão final interessante, estão horas de reflexão e muitas correções.

Na hora agá, esforce-se para contar uma história relevante em sua trajetória e que conte um “algo a mais” que atraia os olhares do comitê de admissão. Para ajudar nesse processo, conheça oito dicas essenciais:

#1 Comece com a ideia central por trás do seu texto

O personal statement é onde o candidato pode demonstrar quem é e contar mais de sua personalidade, de seus sonhos e das ideias que segue. Cada aluno decide por si mesmo quais ideias passarão essa mensagem aos leitores, o que ajudará sua candidatura a se destacar das demais e como usar essa ideia em seu favor.

#2 Mostre seus pontos fortes

Aqui, deve-se seguir a regra à risca: nenhum dos avaliadores vai acreditar em você, a não ser que demonstre os resultados de suas ações. Por exemplo, se disser que é um líder, demonstre isso com suas histórias de vida.

#3 Nunca esconda suas conquistas

Muitos candidatos esquecem que uma conquista diz mais do que todas as palavras. Se participou de conferências, venceu algum prêmio ou conseguiu grants, se liderou algum grupo ou organização, pode mencionar isso no seu texto.

#4 Aposte na coerência ao escrever um personal statement

É claro, há muitos detalhes que um estudante pode incluir no texto que vai apresentá-lo as universidades. Entretanto, isso não significa que se deva adicioná-los aleatoriamente. Uma boa redação deve ser coerente e clara, e todos os aspectos apresentados devem estar bem conectados uns aos outros.

#5 Não se esqueça da revisão e da edição

Erros bobos podem destruir mesmo o melhor dos textos. Para não perder a chance de entrar na universidade dos sonhos porque esqueceu alguns artigos ou preposições, o que vale é apostar na revisão.

#6 Procure recomendações

Ou seja, recorra a alunos e ex-alunos da instituição de ensino em redes sociais, como Facebook e LinkedIn . É a chance de perguntar de forma direta o que eles opinam sobre o que o comitê de admissão busca nas applications.

#7 Mostre detalhes que falem por você

Os detalhes tornam a história mais completa. Quando exibir seus pontos fortes e escrever sobre suas conquistas, não se esqueça de fornecer informações extras, que garantirão mais destaque ao que foi contado.

#8 Tente manter o texto conciso

O ponto é: você só pode usar uma página ou duas para escrever um personal statement, e não há espaço suficiente para dizer tudo que gostaria de contar sobre si mesmo. Então, prepare-se para fazer da edição sua maior aliada.

Quer saber o que brasileiros escrevem em seus texto de apresentação à universidade? Confira o texto submetido por Gustavo Torres , admitido em Stanford e em Harvard para a graduação. A baiana Georgia Gabriela, admitida por nove universidades americanas, também disponibilizou seu essay.

[com participação de Carolina Campos]

Leia também: O que é esperado em um essay Guia de primeiros passos para Estudar Fora Entenda o processo de seleção para universidades no exterior

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How to Write a Personal Statement

A personal statement can be a key part of your college application, and you can really make yours shine by following a few tips.

When you're applying to college—either to an undergraduate or graduate program—you may be asked to submit a personal statement. It's an essay that gives you the chance to share more about who you are and why you'd like to attend the university you're applying to.  

The information you provide in your personal statement can help build on your other application materials, like your transcripts and letters of recommendation, and build a more cohesive picture to help the admissions committee understand your goals.

In this article, we'll go over more about personal statements, including why they're important, what to include in one, and tips for strengthening yours.

What is a personal statement?

A personal statement—sometimes known as a college essay —is a brief written essay you submit with other materials when applying to college or university. Personal statements tend to be most common for undergraduate applications, and they're a great opportunity for an admissions committee to hear your voice directly.

Many colleges and universities in the US, especially those using Common App , provide prompts for you to use. For example, "Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea" or "Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time" [ 1 ]. If the school you're interested in attending doesn't require prompts, you will likely want to craft a response that touches on your story, your values, and your goals if possible.

In grad school, personal statements are sometimes known as letters of intent , and go into more detail about your academic and professional background, while expressing interest in attending the particular program you're applying to.

Why is a personal statement important?

Personal statements are important for a number of reasons. Whereas other materials you submit in an application can address your academic abilities (like your transcripts) or how you perform as a student (like your letters of recommendation), a personal statement is a chance to do exactly that: get more personal.

Personal statements typically:

Permit you to share things that don't fit on your resume, such as personal stories, motivations, and values

Offer schools a chance to see why you're interested in a particular field of study and what you hope to accomplish after you graduate 

Provide an opportunity for you to talk about past employment, volunteer experiences, or skills you have that complement your studies 

Allow colleges to evaluate your writing skills 

Bring life to a college application package otherwise filled with facts and figures 

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How to write a personal statement.

As we mentioned earlier, you may have to respond to a prompt when drafting your personal statement—or a college or university may invite you to respond however you'd like. In either case, use the steps below to begin building your response.

Create a solid hook .

To capture the attention of an admissions committee member, start your personal statement with a hook that relates to the topic of your essay. A hook tends to be a colorful sentence or two at the very beginning that compels the reader to continue reading.

To create a captivating hook, try one of these methods:

Pose a rhetorical question. 

Provide an interesting statistic. 

Insert a quote from a well-known person.

Challenge the reader with a common misconception. 

Use an anecdote, which is a short story that can be true or imaginary. 

Credibility is crucial when writing a personal statement as part of your college application process. If you choose a statistic, quote, or misconception for your hook, make sure it comes from a reliable source.

Follow a narrative.

The best personal statements typically read like a story: they have a common theme, as well as a beginning, middle, and end. This type of format also helps keep your thoughts organized and improves the flow of your essay.

Common themes to consider for your personal statement include:

Special role models from your past

Life-altering events you've experienced

Unusual challenges you've faced

Accomplishments you're especially proud of

Service to others and why you enjoy it

What you've learned from traveling to a particular place

Unique ways you stand out from other candidates

Be specific.

Admissions committees read thousands of personal statements every year, which is why being specific on yours is important. Back up your statements with examples or anecdotes.

For instance, avoid vague assertions like, "I'm interested in your school counseling program because I care about children." Instead, point out experiences you've had with children that emphasize how much you care. For instance, you might mention your summer job as a day camp counselor or your volunteer experience mentoring younger children.

Don't forget to include detail and vibrancy to keep your statement interesting. The use of detail shows how your unique voice and experiences can add value to the college or university you're applying to.

Stay on topic.

It's natural to want to impress the members of the admissions committee who will read your personal statement. The best way to do this is to lead your readers through a cohesive, informative, and descriptive essay.

If you feel you might be going astray, ensure each paragraph in your essay's body supports your introduction. Here are a few more strategies that can help keep you on track:

Know what you want to say and do research if needed. 

Create an outline listing the key points you want to share.

Read your outline aloud to confirm it makes logical sense before proceeding. 

Read your essay aloud while you're writing to confirm you're staying on topic.

Ask a trusted friend or family member to read your essay and make suggestions.

Be true to your own voice.

Because of the importance of your personal statement, you could be tempted to be very formal with structure and language. However, using a more relaxed tone is better than you would for a classroom writing assignment. 

Remember: admissions committees really want to hear from you . Writing in your own voice will help accomplish this. To ensure your tone isn't too relaxed, write your statement as if you were speaking to an older relative or trusted teacher. This way, you'll come across as respectful, confident, and honest.

Tips for drafting an effective personal statement.

Now that you've learned a little about personal statements and how to craft them, here are a few more tips you can follow to strengthen your essay:

1. Customize your statement.

You don't have to completely rewrite your personal statement every time you apply to a new college, but you want to make sure you tailor it as much as possible. For instance, if you talk about wanting to take a certain class or study a certain subject, make sure you adjust any specifics for each application.

2. Avoid cliches.

Admissions committees are ultimately looking for students who will fit the school, and who the school can help guide toward their larger goals. In that case, cliches can get in the way of a reviewer understanding what it is you want from a college education. Watch out for cliches like "making a difference," "broadening my horizons," or "the best thing that ever happened to me."

3. Stay focused.

Try to avoid getting off-track or including tangents in your personal statement. Stay focused by writing a first draft and then re-reading what you've written. Does every paragraph flow from one point to the next? Are the ideas you're presenting cohesive?

4. Stick to topics that aren't controversial.

It's best not to discuss political beliefs or inappropriate topics in your essay. These can be controversial; ideally, you want to share something goals- or values-driven with an admissions committee.

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Article sources

1. Common App. " 2022-2023 Common App Essay Prompts , https://www.commonapp.org/blog/2022-2023-common-app-essay-prompts." Accessed January 9, 2024.

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How to Write a Powerful Personal Statement

A personal statement is a short essay that highlights the best qualities of the writer, usually in the context of school or job applications. Somewhat autobiographical, personal essays delve into the talents, skills, passions, ambitions, and accomplishments of the writer. 

Something to know when applying to schools, scholarships, or companies for a job is that the institution wants to know what kind of person their candidate is. Personal statements enable the evaluation of applicants, not just of what they say about themselves, but also of how they say it. 

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That makes writing personal statements a useful skill for getting accepted at your top school or dream job. Unfortunately, writing about yourself isn’t always easy—it’s quite a personal topic! So in this guide, we explain everything you need to know about how to write a personal statement, including some personal statement examples.   

What is a personal statement? 

As mentioned above, a personal statement is a resource used to evaluate candidates, especially for school applications, employment, scholarships, and some types of grants. It typically explains a candidate’s relationship with the relevant field, such as an academic discipline or job position. 

Take a look at this personal statement example from Uni Compare . Notice how the writer, a prospective law student, discloses their passion for and understanding of legal matters, while also mentioning their relevant experience and achievements.  

In another personal statement example from a would-be English literature student , the writer links their favorite books to their interest in the subject, even sharing personal stories of watching famous plays live at a theater, before listing off their academic accomplishments.  

>>Read More: How to Communicate About Your Achievements

There are no set rules for how to write a personal statement—a lot of your writing choices depend on the assignment and reader—but they typically fall between 400 and 1,000 words, rarely exceeding a single page. 

Personal statements can be either open or prompted. Open personal statements are when you, the writer, get to choose the main topic. These are often more difficult because it requires astute decision-making: How do you choose which parts of your life to write about? 

Prompted personal statements narrow down the focus. This format usually offers a specific question as a prompt, or at least sets some guidelines for what you should cover. 

How to write a personal statement

When writing a personal statement, follow the normal guidelines to essay writing ; after all, a personal statement is often just a short specialized personal essay. 

As with all serious writing, we recommend the six-step writing process . First and foremost, you need to understand the assignment, in particular the necessary topic(s) and target word count. Once you’re sure you know what you need to do, it’s time to begin. 

1 Brainstorming 

The brainstorming phase is when you come up with the different ideas to mention in your personal statement or decide what the main topic will be if the prompt is open. 

For example, if the assignment asks you to write about a significant life event that influenced who you are, you could start by writing down all your most influential life events so that you could pick your subject from the list. The best choice is not always obvious: In this personal statement example, a student uses a conversation with their grandmother to transition into their interest in economics. 

If you already know the most significant life event, you could then brainstorm the different ways it impacted you. Later, you can choose the best ones from the list to include in your personal statement. 

What if you don’t know what to include in your personal statement? Here are some introspective questions to ask yourself to help you find personal topics to write about:

• What was the greatest challenge you’ve faced in your life? How did you overcome it, and/or what did you learn from it? 
• What are you most passionate about? If you had a billion dollars, what would you choose to do all day? 
• What skills, talents, or expertise do you have that your peers do not? What quirks or traits make you stand out? 
• How does your background or identity affect your life? Do people treat you differently because of who you are? How does it change your behavior? 
• Who are your personal heroes? How has their story changed your life? 

Sometimes it’s hard to accurately reflect on yourself, so feel free to ask friends or loved ones for advice. Find out what talents and skills they admire most about you. What would they say are your best traits? 

Once you have enough ideas to satisfy the requirements of the assignment and meet the word count, you can get started on outlining in the next step. 

2 Preparing 

The preparation, or outlining , phase is when you take all your ideas from brainstorming and organize them into a basic framework for your first draft. 

Before you start structuring everything, however, ask yourself whom you’re writing for. Your reader determines not just your tone, but also what you choose to talk about in your personal statement (and what you choose to omit). 

For example, if you’re writing a personal statement for a college application, the school’s admissions officers will probably be interested in your academic achievements, such as landing on the honor roll. However, if you’re writing a personal statement for a job application, academic achievements like the honor roll might not be worth mentioning. 

Try to glean what your reader wants to know before you begin formulating your personal statement. University recruiters want to know if you match their school or program, so include facts about yourself that demonstrate you’re a good fit. Job recruiters want evidence that you’ll do the job well, so include proof of your work ethic and skill mastery. 

With your specific reader in mind, reread your list of ideas from brainstorming. Choose which ones to keep and which ones to leave out. 

From there, organize your ideas into the three sections of your personal statement: introduction, body, and conclusion. In this stage, you don’t need to worry about the details just yet. For now, just make sure all the required ideas are included and sequenced in the right order. 

3 Drafting 

When first learning how to write a personal statement, remember that the drafting phase is usually the longest and most involved—it’s the part of writing your personal statement where you actually write your personal statement. 

Your rough draft, or first draft, doesn’t need to be perfect. Writing a rough draft is just about getting your ideas down; the next stage, revising, is when you focus on the fine details. For now, just write whatever comes to mind and worry about improving it later. 

Just as when you’re writing a college essay , start strong with an opening hook, then expand on that idea in the following paragraphs. In this personal statement example from a chemistry applicant , the writer starts off with a seemingly unrelated personal anecdote, stoking the reader’s curiosity: 

Swimming from a young age always made me ponder the thought, who cleans the pool and how do they do it? As I grew older I realised it wasn’t a case of who, it is a case of what. Essentially, chemistry held the answer. 

The writer then connects the opening anecdote to the main parts of the personal statement—what the reader wants to know. In this case, it’s why they’re a good fit for the school’s chemistry program. 

Writing objectively about yourself is not easy; you can’t always see the forest for the trees. If you feel stuck, it might help to try freewriting , a technique where you just write down everything that comes to mind, no matter if it’s unusable in the final draft. Freewriting is often the push you need to overcome an initial writer’s block.

Because the topic is your life, feel free to write openly and honestly. A lot of times, your readers want to hear your story in your own words —they can get the facts from your school records or résumé/CV, but they can only get your interpretation of these facts from you. Don’t disappoint them! 

Choosing the perfect words and rearranging the structure is much easier when you already have a rough draft in front of you. Now, you can reread your personal statement and fix any areas that need improvement. 

During the revision stage, follow these tips for self-editing , which include watching out for the passive voice, unnecessary words, repetition, long sentences, and a few other red flags. Don’t worry too much about spelling and grammar mistakes for now; you can handle those later when proofreading .  

For personal statements, make sure everything would be clear to a reader who’s never met you. Because the topic is yourself, you may have forgotten to mention some key detail that a stranger wouldn’t know. 

5 Proofreading

With your personal statement polished, you can begin proofreading . This is when you fix all the technical problems like spelling and grammar mistakes, as well as other general issues like formatting. 

Before you start proofreading, it’s a good idea to take a break from working on your personal statement. For one thing, it’s healthy for you to take some time to relax, especially if you’ve been working on it for a long time. Moreover, returning to your draft after you’re refreshed can help you notice small problems you hadn’t seen before. 

If you’re not confident with your knowledge of English spelling or grammar, you can always get help. Grammarly’s writing suggestions find and highlight any mistakes you make while typing, so you can go back and fix them whenever you like. On top of that, Grammarly’s tone detector helps with your phrasing, letting you know if your language is appropriately formal for a personal statement. 

Those features are all available in Grammarly’s free offering, with even more in Grammarly Premium . Download Grammarly now to see how your writing improves. 

6 Submitting

The last step is an easy one: Turn in your personal statement. Double-check that you’ve fulfilled the requirements, including word count, and make sure it’s in the requested format (PDF, Word document, etc.). 

What comes next, though, is truly the hardest part of writing a personal statement: waiting for a response back! 

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How to Write a Personal Statement (with Tips and Examples)

Hannah Yang

Table of Contents

What is a personal statement, 6 tips on how to write a personal statement, personal statement examples (for college and university), faqs about writing personal statements, conclusion on how to write a personal statement.

How do you tell someone who you are in just a few hundred words?

It’s certainly no easy task, but it’s one almost every college applicant must do. The personal statement is a crucial part of any college or university application.

So, how do you write a compelling personal statement?

In this article, we’ll give you all the tools, tips, and examples you need to write an effective personal statement.

A personal statement is a short essay that reveals something important about who you are. It can talk about your background, your interests, your values, your goals in life, or all of the above.

Personal statements are required by many college admission offices and scholarship selection committees. They’re a key part of your application, alongside your academic transcript, standardized test scores, and extracurricular activities.

The reason application committees ask you to write a personal statement is so they can get to know who you are. 

Some personal statements have specific prompts, such as “Discuss a period of personal growth in your life” or “Tell us about a challenge or failure you’ve faced.” Others are more open-ended with prompts that essentially boil down to “Tell us about yourself.”

No matter what the prompt is, your goal is the same: to make yourself stand out to the selection committee as a strong candidate for their program.

Here are some things a personal statement can be:

It can be funny. If you have a great sense of humor, your personal statement is a great place to let that shine.  

It can be vulnerable. Don’t be afraid to open up about hardships in your life or failures you’ve experienced. Showing vulnerability can make you sound more like a real person rather than just a collection of application materials.  

It can be creative. Candidates have got into top schools with personal statements that take the form of “a day in the life” descriptions, third-person short stories, and even cooking recipes.

Now we’ve talked about what a personal statement is, let’s quickly look at what a personal statement isn’t:

It isn’t a formal academic paper. You should write the personal statement in your natural voice, using first-person pronouns like “I” and “me,” not in the formal, objective language you would use to write an academic paper.

It isn’t a five-paragraph essay. You should use as many paragraphs as you need to tell your story instead of sticking to the essay structure you learned in school.

It isn’t a resumé. You should try to describe yourself by telling a clear and cohesive story rather than providing a jumbled list of all of your accomplishments and ambitions.

Here are our top six tips for writing a strong personal statement.

Tip 1: Do Some Serious Self-Reflection

The hardest part of writing a personal statement isn’t the actual process of writing it.

Before you start typing, you have to figure out what to write about. And that means taking some time to reflect on who you are and what’s important in your life.

Here are some useful questions you can use to start your self-reflection. You can either answer these on your own by writing down your answers, or you can ask a trusted friend to listen as you talk about them together.

What were the key moments that shaped your life? (e.g. an important friendship, a travel experience, an illness or injury)

What are you proud of? (e.g. you’re a good listener, you always keep your promises, you’re a talented musician)

How do you choose to spend your time? (e.g. reading, practicing soccer, spending time with your friends)

What inspires you? (e.g. your grandmother, a celebrity, your favorite song)

Doing this self-reflection is crucial for figuring out the perfect topics and anecdotes you can use to describe who you are.

Tip 2: Try to Avoid Cliché Topics

College application committees read thousands of personal statements a year. That means there are some personal statement topics they see over and over again.

Here are a few examples of common personal statement topics that have become cliché:

Winning a tournament or sports game

Volunteering in a foreign country

Moving to a new home

Becoming an older sibling

Being an immigrant or having immigrant parents

If you want to make a strong impression in the application process, you need to make your personal statement stand out from the crowd.

But if your chosen personal statement topic falls into one of these categories, that doesn’t necessarily mean you shouldn’t use it. Just make sure to put a unique spin on it so it still delivers something the committee hasn’t seen before.

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Tip 3: Show, Don’t Tell

One common mistake you might make in your personal statement is to simply tell the reader what you want them to know about you, such as by stating “I have a fear of public speaking” or “I love to cook.”

Instead of simply stating these facts, you should show the committee what you’re talking about through a story or scene, which will make your essay much more immersive and memorable.

For example, let’s say you want the committee to know you overcame your fear of public speaking. Instead of writing “I overcame my fear of public speaking,” show them what it was like to be onstage in front of a microphone. Did your palms get clammy? Did you feel light-headed? Did you forget your words?

Or let’s say you want the committee to know you love to cook. Instead of writing “I love to cook,” show them why you love to cook. What’s your favorite dish to cook? What does the air smell like when you’re cooking it? What kitchen appliances do you use to make it?

Tip 4: Connect the Story to Why You’re Applying

Don’t forget that the purpose of your personal statement isn’t simply to tell the admissions committee who you are. That’s an important part of it, of course, but your ultimate goal is to convince them to choose you as a candidate.

That means it’s important to tie your personal story to your reasons for applying to this specific school or scholarship. Finish your essay with a strong thesis.

For example, if your story is about overcoming your fear of public speaking, you might connect that story to your ambition of becoming a politician. You can then tie that to your application by saying, “I want to apply to this school because of its fantastic politics program, which will give me a perfect opportunity to use my voice.”

Tip 5: Write in Your Own Voice

The personal statement isn’t supposed to be written in a formal tone. That’s why they’re called “personal” statements because you have to shape it to fit your own voice and style.

Don’t use complicated or overwrought language. You don’t need to fill your essay with semicolons and big words, unless that’s how you sound in real life.

One way to write in your own voice is by speaking your personal statement out loud. If it doesn’t feel natural, it may need changing. 

Tip 6: Edit, Edit, Edit!

It’s important to revise your personal statement multiple times in order to make sure it’s as close to perfect as possible.

A single typo won’t kill your application, but if your personal statement contains multiple spelling errors or egregious grammar mistakes, you won’t be putting your best foot forward.

ProWritingAid can help you make sure your personal statement is as clean as possible. In addition to catching your grammar errors, typos, and punctuation mistakes, it will also help you improve weaknesses in your writing, such as passive voice, unnecessary repetition, and more.

Let’s look at some of the best personal statements that have worked for successful candidates in the real world. 

Harvard Personal Statement Example

Love. For a word describing such a powerful emotion, it is always in the air. The word “love” has become so pervasive in everyday conversation that it hardly retains its roots in blazing passion and deep adoration. In fact, the word is thrown about so much that it becomes difficult to believe society isn’t just one huge, smitten party, with everyone holding hands and singing “Kumbaya.” In films, it’s the teenage boy’s grudging response to a doting mother. At school, it’s a habitual farewell between friends. But in my Chinese home, it’s never uttered. Watching my grandmother lie unconscious on the hospital bed, waiting for her body to shut down, was excruciatingly painful. Her final quavering breaths formed a discordant rhythm with the steady beep of hospital equipment and the unsympathetic tapping hands of the clock. That evening, I whispered—into unhearing ears—the first, and only, “I love you” I ever said to her, my rankling guilt haunting me relentlessly for weeks after her passing. My warm confession seemed anticlimactic, met with only the coldness of my surroundings—the blank room, impassive doctors, and empty silence. I struggled to understand why the “love” that so easily rolled off my tongue when bantering with friends dissipated from my vocabulary when I spoke to my family. Do Chinese people simply love less than Americans do?

This is an excerpt from a personal statement that got the applicant admitted to Harvard University. The applicant discusses her background as a Chinese-American by musing on the word “love” and what that means within her family.

The writer uses vulnerable details about her relationship with her grandmother to give the reader an understanding of where she comes from and how her family has shaped her.  

You can read the full personal statement on the Harvard Crimson website.

Tufts Personal Statement Example

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry’s “Cars and Trucks and Things That Go,” and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon. Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration. Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear. I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

This is the beginning of a personal statement by Renner Kwittken, who was admitted into Tufts University as a pre-medical student.

Renner uses a humorous anecdote about being a pickle truck driver to describe his love for nanomedicine and how he got involved in his field. You can feel his passion for medicine throughout his personal statement.

You can find Renner’s full essay on the Tufts Admissions page.

Law School Personal Statement Essay Example

For most people, the slap on the face that turns their life around is figurative. Mine was literal. Actually, it was a punch delivered by a drill sergeant at Fort Dix, New Jersey, while I was in basic training. That day’s activity, just a few weeks into the program, included instruction in “low-crawling,” a sensible method of moving from one place to another on a battlefield. I felt rather clever for having discovered that, by looking right rather than down, I eliminated my helmet’s unfortunate tendency to dig into the ground and slow my progress. I could thus advance more easily, but I also exposed my unprotected face to hostile fire. Drill sergeants are typically very good at detecting this type of laziness, and mine was an excellent drill sergeant. So, after his repeated suggestions that I correct my performance went unheeded, he drove home his point with a fist to my face. We were both stunned. This was, after all, the New Army, and striking a trainee was a career-ending move for a drill sergeant, as we were both aware. I could have reported him; arguably, I should have. I didn’t. It didn’t seem right for this good sergeant, who had not slept for almost four days, to lose his career for losing his temper with my laziness. Choosing not to report him was the first decision I remember making that made me proud.

These are the first three paragraphs of an anonymous personal statement by a Wheaton College graduate, who used this personal statement to get into a top-25 law school.

This statement describes a time the applicant faced a challenging decision while in the army. He ended up making a decision he was proud of, and as a result, the personal statement gives us a sense of his character.

You can find the full essay on the Wheaton Academics website.

Here are some common questions about how to write a personal statement.

How Long Should a Personal Statement Be?

The length of your personal statement depends on the specific program you’re applying to. The application guidelines usually specify a maximum word count or an ideal word count.  

Most personal statements are between 500–800 words. That’s a good general range to aim for if you don’t have more specific guidelines.  

Should Personal Statements Be Different for Scholarships?

Many scholarship applications will ask for personal statements with similar prompts to those of college applications.

However, the purpose of a personal statement you’d write for a scholarship application is different from the purpose of one you’d write for a college application.

For a scholarship application, your goal is to showcase why you deserve the scholarship. To do that, you need to understand the mission of the organization offering that scholarship.

For example, some scholarships are meant to help first-generation college students get their degree, while others are meant to help women break into STEM.

Consider the following questions:

Why is this organization offering scholarships?

What would their ideal scholarship candidate look like?

How do your experiences and goals overlap with those of their ideal scholarship candidate?

You can use the same personal anecdotes you’d use for any other personal statement, but you’ll have a better chance of winning the scholarship if you tailor your essay to match their specific mission.

How to Start a Personal Statement

You should start your personal statement with a “hook” that pulls the reader in. The sooner you catch the reader’s attention, the more likely they’ll want to read the entire essay.

Here are some examples of hooks you can use:

A story (e.g. When the spotlight hit my face, I tried to remind myself to breathe. )

A setting description (e.g. My bedroom floor is covered with dirty laundry, candy wrappers, and crumpled sheet music. )

A funny anecdote (e.g. When I was a little kid, my friends nicknamed me Mowgli because of my haircut. )

A surprising fact (e.g. I've lived in 37 countries .)

There you have it—our complete guide to writing a personal statement that will make you stand out to the application committee.

Here’s a quick recap: 

A personal statement is a short essay that shows an application committee who you are

Start with a strong hook that pulls the reader in

Tell a story to engage the reader 

Write in your own voice, not in a formal tone

Good luck, and happy writing!

Hannah is a speculative fiction writer who loves all things strange and surreal. She holds a BA from Yale University and lives in Colorado. When she’s not busy writing, you can find her painting watercolors, playing her ukulele, or hiking in the Rockies. Follow her work on hannahyang.com or on Twitter at @hannahxyang.

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• Knowledge Base
• Applying to graduate school
• How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples

How to Write Your Personal Statement | Strategies & Examples

Published on February 12, 2019 by Shona McCombes . Revised on July 3, 2023.

A personal statement is a short essay of around 500–1,000 words, in which you tell a compelling story about who you are, what drives you, and why you’re applying.

To write a successful personal statement for a graduate school application , don’t just summarize your experience; instead, craft a focused narrative in your own voice. Aim to demonstrate three things:

• Your personality: what are your interests, values, and motivations?
• Your talents: what can you bring to the program?
• Your goals: what do you hope the program will do for you?

This article guides you through some winning strategies to build a strong, well-structured personal statement for a master’s or PhD application. You can download the full examples below.

Urban Planning Psychology History

Table of contents

Getting started with your personal statement, the introduction: start with an attention-grabbing opening, the main body: craft your narrative, the conclusion: look ahead, revising, editing, and proofreading your personal statement, frequently asked questions, other interesting articles.

Before you start writing, the first step is to understand exactly what’s expected of you. If the application gives you a question or prompt for your personal statement, the most important thing is to respond to it directly.

For example, you might be asked to focus on the development of your personal identity; challenges you have faced in your life; or your career motivations. This will shape your focus and emphasis—but you still need to find your own unique approach to answering it.

There’s no universal template for a personal statement; it’s your chance to be creative and let your own voice shine through. But there are strategies you can use to build a compelling, well-structured story.

The first paragraph of your personal statement should set the tone and lead smoothly into the story you want to tell.

Strategy 1: Open with a concrete scene

An effective way to catch the reader’s attention is to set up a scene that illustrates something about your character and interests. If you’re stuck, try thinking about:

• A personal experience that changed your perspective
• A story from your family’s history
• A memorable teacher or learning experience
• An unusual or unexpected encounter

To write an effective scene, try to go beyond straightforward description; start with an intriguing sentence that pulls the reader in, and give concrete details to create a convincing atmosphere.

Strategy 2: Open with your motivations

To emphasize your enthusiasm and commitment, you can start by explaining your interest in the subject you want to study or the career path you want to follow.

Just stating that it interests you isn’t enough: first, you need to figure out why you’re interested in this field:

• Is it a longstanding passion or a recent discovery?
• Does it come naturally or have you had to work hard at it?
• How does it fit into the rest of your life?
• What do you think it contributes to society?

Tips for the introduction

• Don’t start on a cliche: avoid phrases like “Ever since I was a child…” or “For as long as I can remember…”
• Do save the introduction for last. If you’re struggling to come up with a strong opening, leave it aside, and note down any interesting ideas that occur to you as you write the rest of the personal statement.

Once you’ve set up the main themes of your personal statement, you’ll delve into more detail about your experiences and motivations.

To structure the body of your personal statement, there are various strategies you can use.

Strategy 1: Describe your development over time

One of the simplest strategies is to give a chronological overview of key experiences that have led you to apply for graduate school.

• What first sparked your interest in the field?
• Which classes, assignments, classmates, internships, or other activities helped you develop your knowledge and skills?
• Where do you want to go next? How does this program fit into your future plans?

Don’t try to include absolutely everything you’ve done—pick out highlights that are relevant to your application. Aim to craft a compelling narrative that shows how you’ve changed and actively developed yourself.

My interest in psychology was first sparked early in my high school career. Though somewhat scientifically inclined, I found that what interested me most was not the equations we learned about in physics and chemistry, but the motivations and perceptions of my fellow students, and the subtle social dynamics that I observed inside and outside the classroom. I wanted to learn how our identities, beliefs, and behaviours are shaped through our interactions with others, so I decided to major in Social Psychology. My undergraduate studies deepened my understanding of, and fascination with, the interplay between an individual mind and its social context.During my studies, I acquired a solid foundation of knowledge about concepts like social influence and group dynamics, but I also took classes on various topics not strictly related to my major. I was particularly interested in how other fields intersect with psychology—the classes I took on media studies, biology, and literature all enhanced my understanding of psychological concepts by providing different lenses through which to look at the issues involved.

Strategy 2: Own your challenges and obstacles

If your path to graduate school hasn’t been easy or straightforward, you can turn this into a strength, and structure your personal statement as a story of overcoming obstacles.

• Is your social, cultural or economic background underrepresented in the field? Show how your experiences will contribute a unique perspective.
• Do you have gaps in your resume or lower-than-ideal grades? Explain the challenges you faced and how you dealt with them.

Don’t focus too heavily on negatives, but use them to highlight your positive qualities. Resilience, resourcefulness and perseverance make you a promising graduate school candidate.

Growing up working class, urban decay becomes depressingly familiar. The sight of a row of abandoned houses does not surprise me, but it continues to bother me. Since high school, I have been determined to pursue a career in urban planning. While people of my background experience the consequences of urban planning decisions first-hand, we are underrepresented in the field itself. Ironically, given my motivation, my economic background has made my studies challenging. I was fortunate enough to be awarded a scholarship for my undergraduate studies, but after graduation I took jobs in unrelated fields to help support my parents. In the three years since, I have not lost my ambition. Now I am keen to resume my studies, and I believe I can bring an invaluable perspective to the table: that of the people most impacted by the decisions of urban planners.

Strategy 3: Demonstrate your knowledge of the field

Especially if you’re applying for a PhD or another research-focused program, it’s a good idea to show your familiarity with the subject and the department. Your personal statement can focus on the area you want to specialize in and reflect on why it matters to you.

• Reflect on the topics or themes that you’ve focused on in your studies. What draws you to them?
• Discuss any academic achievements, influential teachers, or other highlights of your education.
• Talk about the questions you’d like to explore in your research and why you think they’re important.

The personal statement isn’t a research proposal , so don’t go overboard on detail—but it’s a great opportunity to show your enthusiasm for the field and your capacity for original thinking.

In applying for this research program, my intention is to build on the multidisciplinary approach I have taken in my studies so far, combining knowledge from disparate fields of study to better understand psychological concepts and issues. The Media Psychology program stands out to me as the perfect environment for this kind of research, given its researchers’ openness to collaboration across diverse fields. I am impressed by the department’s innovative interdisciplinary projects that focus on the shifting landscape of media and technology, and I hope that my own work can follow a similarly trailblazing approach. More specifically, I want to develop my understanding of the intersection of psychology and media studies, and explore how media psychology theories and methods might be applied to neurodivergent minds. I am interested not only in media psychology but also in psychological disorders, and how the two interact. This is something I touched on during my undergraduate studies and that I’m excited to delve into further.

Strategy 4: Discuss your professional ambitions

Especially if you’re applying for a more professionally-oriented program (such as an MBA), it’s a good idea to focus on concrete goals and how the program will help you achieve them.

• If your career is just getting started, show how your character is suited to the field, and explain how graduate school will help you develop your talents.
• If you have already worked in the profession, show what you’ve achieved so far, and explain how the program will allow you to take the next step.
• If you are planning a career change, explain what has driven this decision and how your existing experience will help you succeed.

Don’t just state the position you want to achieve. You should demonstrate that you’ve put plenty of thought into your career plans and show why you’re well-suited to this profession.

One thing that fascinated me about the field during my undergraduate studies was the sheer number of different elements whose interactions constitute a person’s experience of an urban environment. Any number of factors could transform the scene I described at the beginning: What if there were no bus route? Better community outreach in the neighborhood? Worse law enforcement? More or fewer jobs available in the area? Some of these factors are out of the hands of an urban planner, but without taking them all into consideration, the planner has an incomplete picture of their task. Through further study I hope to develop my understanding of how these disparate elements combine and interact to create the urban environment. I am interested in the social, psychological and political effects our surroundings have on our lives. My studies will allow me to work on projects directly affecting the kinds of working-class urban communities I know well. I believe I can bring my own experiences, as well as my education, to bear upon the problem of improving infrastructure and quality of life in these communities.

Tips for the main body

• Don’t rehash your resume by trying to summarize everything you’ve done so far; the personal statement isn’t about listing your academic or professional experience, but about reflecting, evaluating, and relating it to broader themes.
• Do make your statements into stories: Instead of saying you’re hard-working and self-motivated, write about your internship where you took the initiative to start a new project. Instead of saying you’ve always loved reading, reflect on a novel or poem that changed your perspective.

Your conclusion should bring the focus back to the program and what you hope to get out of it, whether that’s developing practical skills, exploring intellectual questions, or both.

Emphasize the fit with your specific interests, showing why this program would be the best way to achieve your aims.

Strategy 1: What do you want to know?

If you’re applying for a more academic or research-focused program, end on a note of curiosity: what do you hope to learn, and why do you think this is the best place to learn it?

If there are specific classes or faculty members that you’re excited to learn from, this is the place to express your enthusiasm.

Strategy 2: What do you want to do?

If you’re applying for a program that focuses more on professional training, your conclusion can look to your career aspirations: what role do you want to play in society, and why is this program the best choice to help you get there?

Tips for the conclusion

• Don’t summarize what you’ve already said. You have limited space in a personal statement, so use it wisely!
• Do think bigger than yourself: try to express how your individual aspirations relate to your local community, your academic field, or society more broadly. It’s not just about what you’ll get out of graduate school, but about what you’ll be able to give back.

You’ll be expected to do a lot of writing in graduate school, so make a good first impression: leave yourself plenty of time to revise and polish the text.

Your style doesn’t have to be as formal as other kinds of academic writing, but it should be clear, direct and coherent. Make sure that each paragraph flows smoothly from the last, using topic sentences and transitions to create clear connections between each part.

Don’t be afraid to rewrite and restructure as much as necessary. Since you have a lot of freedom in the structure of a personal statement, you can experiment and move information around to see what works best.

Finally, it’s essential to carefully proofread your personal statement and fix any language errors. Before you submit your application, consider investing in professional personal statement editing . For $150, you have the peace of mind that your personal statement is grammatically correct, strong in term of your arguments, and free of awkward mistakes.

A statement of purpose is usually more formal, focusing on your academic or professional goals. It shouldn’t include anything that isn’t directly relevant to the application.

A personal statement can often be more creative. It might tell a story that isn’t directly related to the application, but that shows something about your personality, values, and motivations.

However, both types of document have the same overall goal: to demonstrate your potential as a graduate student and s how why you’re a great match for the program.

The typical length of a personal statement for graduate school applications is between 500 and 1,000 words.

Different programs have different requirements, so always check if there’s a minimum or maximum length and stick to the guidelines. If there is no recommended word count, aim for no more than 1-2 pages.

If you’re applying to multiple graduate school programs, you should tailor your personal statement to each application.

Some applications provide a prompt or question. In this case, you might have to write a new personal statement from scratch: the most important task is to respond to what you have been asked.

If there’s no prompt or guidelines, you can re-use the same idea for your personal statement – but change the details wherever relevant, making sure to emphasize why you’re applying to this specific program.

If the application also includes other essays, such as a statement of purpose , you might have to revise your personal statement to avoid repeating the same information.

If you want to know more about college essays , academic writing , and AI tools , make sure to check out some of our other language articles with explanations, examples, and quizzes.

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• Literature review
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How to Write a Strong Personal Statement

• Ruth Gotian
• Ushma S. Neill

A few adjustments can get your application noticed.

Whether applying for a summer internship, a professional development opportunity, such as a Fulbright, an executive MBA program, or a senior leadership development course, a personal statement threads the ideas of your CV, and is longer and has a different tone and purpose than a traditional cover letter. A few adjustments to your personal statement can get your application noticed by the reviewer.

• Make sure you’re writing what they want to hear. Most organizations that offer a fellowship or internship are using the experience as a pipeline: It’s smart to spend 10 weeks and $15,000 on someone before committing five years and $300,000. Rarely are the organizations being charitable or altruistic, so align your stated goals with theirs
• Know when to bury the lead, and when to get to the point. It’s hard to paint a picture and explain your motivations in 200 words, but if you have two pages, give the reader a story arc or ease into your point by setting the scene.
• Recognize that the reviewer will be reading your statement subjectively, meaning you’re being assessed on unknowable criteria. Most people on evaluation committees are reading for whether or not you’re interesting. Stated differently, do they want to go out to dinner with you to hear more? Write it so that the person reading it wants to hear more.
• Address the elephant in the room (if there is one). Maybe your grades weren’t great in core courses, or perhaps you’ve never worked in the field you’re applying to. Make sure to address the deficiency rather than hoping the reader ignores it because they won’t. A few sentences suffice. Deficiencies do not need to be the cornerstone of the application.

At multiple points in your life, you will need to take action to transition from where you are to where you want to be. This process is layered and time-consuming, and getting yourself to stand out among the masses is an arduous but not impossible task. Having a polished resume that explains what you’ve done is the common first step. But, when an application asks for it, a personal statement can add color and depth to your list of accomplishments. It moves you from a one-dimensional indistinguishable candidate to someone with drive, interest, and nuance.

• Ruth Gotian is the chief learning officer and associate professor of education in anesthesiology at Weill Cornell Medicine in New York City, and the author of The Success Factor and Financial Times Guide to Mentoring . She was named the #1 emerging management thinker by Thinkers50. You can access her free list of conversation starters and test your mentoring impact . RuthGotian
• Ushma S. Neill is the Vice President, Scientific Education & Training at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in New York City. She runs several summer internships and is involved with the NYC Marshall Scholar Selection Committee. ushmaneill

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Sat / act prep online guides and tips, what is a personal statement everything you need to know about the college essay.

College Admissions , College Essays

In addition to standardized test scores and transcripts, a personal statement or essay is a required part of many college applications. The personal statement can be one of the most stressful parts of the application process because it's the most open ended.

In this guide, I'll answer the question, "What is a personal statement?" I'll talk through common college essay topics and what makes for an effective personal statement.

College Essay Glossary

Even the terminology can be confusing if you aren't familiar with it, so let's start by defining some terms:

Personal statement —an essay you write to show a college admissions committee who you are and why you deserve to be admitted to their school. It's worth noting that, unlike "college essay," this term is used for application essays for graduate school as well.

College essay —basically the same as a personal statement (I'll be using the terms interchangeably).

Essay prompt —a question or statement that your college essay is meant to respond to.

Supplemental essay —an extra school or program-specific essay beyond the basic personal statement.

Many colleges ask for only one essay. However, some schools do ask you to respond to multiple prompts or to provide supplemental essays in addition to a primary personal statement.

Either way, don't let it stress you out! This guide will cover everything you need to know about the different types of college essays and get you started thinking about how to write a great one:

• Why colleges ask for an essay
• What kinds of essay questions you'll see
• What sets great essays apart
• Tips for writing your own essay

Why Do Colleges Ask For an Essay?

There are a couple of reasons that colleges ask applicants to submit an essay, but the basic idea is that it gives them more information about you, especially who you are beyond grades and test scores.

#1: Insight Into Your Personality

The most important role of the essay is to give admissions committees a sense of your personality and what kind of addition you'd be to their school's community . Are you inquisitive? Ambitious? Caring? These kinds of qualities will have a profound impact on your college experience, but they're hard to determine based on a high school transcript.

Basically, the essay contextualizes your application and shows what kind of person you are outside of your grades and test scores . Imagine two students, Jane and Tim: they both have 3.5 GPAs and 1200s on the SAT. Jane lives in Colorado and is the captain of her track team; Tim lives in Vermont and regularly contributes to the school paper. They both want to be doctors, and they both volunteer at the local hospital.

As similar as Jane and Tim seem on paper, in reality, they're actually quite different, and their unique perspectives come through in their essays. Jane writes about how looking into her family history for a school project made her realize how the discovery of modern medical treatments like antibiotics and vaccines had changed the world and drove her to pursue a career as a medical researcher. Tim, meanwhile, recounts a story about how a kind doctor helped him overcome his fear of needles, an interaction that reminded him of the value of empathy and inspired him to become a family practitioner. These two students may seem outwardly similar but their motivations and personalities are very different.

Without an essay, your application is essentially a series of numbers: a GPA, SAT scores, the number of hours spent preparing for quiz bowl competitions. The personal statement is your chance to stand out as an individual.

#2: Evidence of Writing Skills

A secondary purpose of the essay is to serve as a writing sample and help colleges see that you have the skills needed to succeed in college classes. The personal statement is your best chance to show off your writing , so take the time to craft a piece you're really proud of.

That said, don't panic if you aren't a strong writer. Admissions officers aren't expecting you to write like Joan Didion; they just want to see that you can express your ideas clearly.

No matter what, your essay should absolutely not include any errors or typos .

#3: Explanation of Extenuating Circumstances

For some students, the essay is also a chance to explain factors affecting their high school record. Did your grades drop sophomore year because you were dealing with a family emergency? Did you miss out on extracurriculars junior year because of an extended medical absence? Colleges want to know if you struggled with a serious issue that affected your high school record , so make sure to indicate any relevant circumstances on your application.

Keep in mind that in some cases there will be a separate section for you to address these types of issues, as well as any black marks on your record like expulsions or criminal charges.

#4: Your Reasons for Applying to the School

Many colleges ask you to write an essay or paragraph about why you're applying to their school specifically . In asking these questions, admissions officers are trying to determine if you're genuinely excited about the school and whether you're likely to attend if accepted .

I'll talk more about this type of essay below.

What Kind of Questions Do Colleges Ask?

Thankfully, applications don't simply say, "Please include an essay about yourself"; they include a question or prompt that you're asked to respond to . These prompts are generally pretty open-ended and can be approached in a lot of different ways .

Nonetheless, most questions fall into a few main categories. Let's go through each common type of prompt, with examples from the Common Application, the University of California application, and a few individual schools.

Prompt Type 1: Your Personal History

This sort of question asks you to write about a formative experience, important event, or key relationship from your life . Admissions officers want to understand what is important to you and how your background has shaped you as a person.

These questions are both common and tricky. The most common pit students fall into is trying to tell their entire life stories. It's better to focus in on a very specific point in time and explain why it was meaningful to you.

Common App 1

Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.

Common App 5

Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.

University of California 2

Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.

University of California 6

Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.

Prompt Type 2: Facing a Problem

A lot of prompts deal with how you solve problems, how you cope with failure, and how you respond to conflict. College can be difficult, both personally and academically, and admissions committees want to see that you're equipped to face those challenges .

The key to these types of questions is to identify a real problem, failure, or conflict ( not a success in disguise) and show how you adapted and grew from addressing the issue.

Common App 2

The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience?

Harvard University 7

The Harvard College Honor Code declares that we “hold honesty as the foundation of our community.” As you consider entering this community that is committed to honesty, please reflect on a time when you or someone you observed had to make a choice about whether to act with integrity and honesty.

Prompt Type 3: Diversity

Most colleges are pretty diverse, with students from a wide range of backgrounds. Essay questions about diversity are designed to help admissions committees understand how you interact with people who are different from you .

In addressing these prompts, you want to show that you're capable of engaging with new ideas and relating to people who may have different beliefs than you.

Common App 3

Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome?

Johns Hopkins University

Tell us about an aspect of your identity (e.g., race, gender, sexuality, religion, community) or a life experience that has shaped you as an individual and how that influenced what you’d like to pursue in college at Hopkins.  This can be a future goal or experience that is either [sic] academic, extracurricular, or social.

Duke University Optional 1

We believe a wide range of personal perspectives, beliefs, and lived experiences are essential to making Duke a vibrant and meaningful living and learning community. Feel free to share with us anything in this context that might help us better understand you and what you might bring to our community. 

Prompt Type 4: Your Future Goals

This type of prompt asks about what you want to do in the future: sometimes simply what you'd like to study, sometimes longer-term career goals. Colleges want to understand what you're interested in and how you plan to work towards your goals.

You'll mostly see these prompts if you're applying for a specialized program (like pre-med or engineering) or applying as a transfer student. Some schools also ask for supplementary essays along these lines. 

University of Southern California (Architecture)

Princeton Supplement 1

Prompt Type 5: Why This School

The most common style of supplemental essay is the "why us?" essay, although a few schools with their own application use this type of question as their main prompt. In these essays, you're meant to address the specific reasons you want to go to the school you're applying to .

Whatever you do, don't ever recycle these essays for more than one school.

Chapman University

There are thousands of universities and colleges. Why are you interested in attending Chapman?

Columbia University

Why are you interested in attending Columbia University? We encourage you to consider the aspect(s) that you find unique and compelling about Columbia.

Rice University

Based upon your exploration of Rice University, what elements of the Rice experience appeal to you?

Princeton University

Princeton has a longstanding commitment to understanding our responsibility to society through service and civic engagement. How does your own story intersect with these ideals?

Prompt Type 6: Creative Prompts

More selective schools often have supplemental essays with stranger or more unique questions. University of Chicago is notorious for its weird prompts, but it's not the only school that will ask you to think outside the box in addressing its questions.

University of Chicago

“Vlog,” “Labradoodle,” and “Fauxmage.” Language is filled with portmanteaus. Create a new portmanteau and explain why those two things are a “patch” (perfect match).

University of Vermont

Established in Burlington, VT, Ben & Jerry’s is synonymous with both ice cream and social change. The “Save Our Swirled” flavor raises awareness of climate change, and “I Dough, I Dough” celebrates marriage equality. If you worked alongside Ben & Jerry, what charitable flavor would you develop and why?

What Makes a Strong Personal Statement?

OK , so you're clear on what a college essay is, but you're still not sure how to write a good one . To help you get started, I'm going to explain the main things admissions officers look for in students' essays: an engaging perspective, genuine moments, and lively writing .

I've touched on these ideas already, but here, I'll go into more depth about how the best essays stand out from the pack.

Showing Who You Are

A lot of students panic about finding a unique topic, and certainly writing about something unusual like a successful dating app you developed with your friends or your time working as a mall Santa can't hurt you. But what's really important isn't so much what you write about as how you write about it . You need to use your subject to show something deeper about yourself.

Look at the prompts above: you'll notice that they almost all ask you what you learned or how the experience affected you. Whatever topic you pick, you must be able to specifically address how or why it matters to you .

Say a student, Will, was writing about the mall Santa in response to Common App prompt number 2 (the one about failure): Will was a terrible mall Santa. He was way too skinny to be convincing and the kids would always step on his feet. He could easily write 600 very entertaining words describing this experience, but they wouldn't necessarily add up to an effective college essay.

To do that, he'll need to talk about his motivations and his feelings: why he took such a job in the first place and what he did (and didn't) get out of it. Maybe Will took the job because he needed to make some money to go on a school trip and it was the only one he could find. Despite his lack of enthusiasm for screaming children, he kept doing it because he knew if he persevered through the whole holiday season he would have enough money for his trip. Would you rather read "I failed at being a mall Santa" or "Failing as a mall Santa taught me how to persevere no matter what"? Admissions officers definitely prefer the latter.

Ultimately, the best topics are ones that allow you to explain something surprising about yourself .

Since the main point of the essay is to give schools a sense of who you are, you have to open up enough to let them see your personality . Writing a good college essay means being honest about your feelings and experiences even when they aren't entirely positive.

In this context, honesty doesn't mean going on at length about the time you broke into the local pool at night and nearly got arrested, but it does mean acknowledging when something was difficult or upsetting for you. Think about the mall Santa example above. The essay won't work unless the writer genuinely acknowledges that he was a bad Santa and explains why.

Eloquent Writing

As I mentioned above, colleges want to know that you are a strong enough writer to survive in college classes . Can you express your ideas clearly and concisely? Can you employ specific details appropriately and avoid clichés and generalizations? These kinds of skills will serve you well in college (and in life!).

Nonetheless, admissions officers recognize that different students have different strengths. They aren't looking for a poetic magnum opus from someone who wants to be a math major. (Honestly, they aren't expecting a masterwork from anyone , but the basic point stands.) Focus on making sure that your thoughts and personality come through, and don't worry about using fancy vocabulary or complex rhetorical devices.

Above all, make sure that you have zero grammar or spelling errors . Typos indicate carelessness, which will hurt your cause with admissions officers.

Top Five Essay-Writing Tips

Now that you have a sense of what colleges are looking for, let's talk about how you can put this new knowledge into practice as you approach your own essay. Below, I've collected my five best tips from years as a college essay counselor.

#1: Start Early!

No matter how much you want to avoid writing your essay, don't leave it until the last minute . One of the most important parts of the essay writing process is editing, and editing takes a lot of time. You want to be able to put your draft in a drawer for a week and come back to it with fresh eyes. You don't want to be stuck with an essay you don't really like because you have to submit your application tomorrow.

You need plenty of time to experiment and rewrite, so I would recommend starting your essays at least two months before the application deadline . For most students, that means starting around Halloween, but if you're applying early, you'll need to get going closer to Labor Day.

Of course, it's even better to get a head start and begin your planning earlier. Many students like to work on their essays over the summer, when they have more free time, but you should keep in mind that each year's application isn't usually released until August or September. Essay questions often stay the same from year to year, however. If you are looking to get a jump on writing, you can try to confirm with the school (or the Common App) whether the essay questions will be the same as the previous year's.

#2: Pick a Topic You're Genuinely Excited About

One of the biggest mistakes students make is trying to write what they think the committee wants to hear. The truth is that there's no "right answer" when it comes to college essays . T he best topics aren't limited to specific categories like volunteer experiences or winning a tournament. Instead, they're topics that actually matter to the writer .

"OK," you're thinking, "but what does she mean by 'a topic that matters to you'? Because to be perfectly honest, right now, what really matters to me is that fall TV starts up this week, and I have a feeling I shouldn't write about that."

You're not wrong (although some great essays have been written about television ). A great topic isn't just something that you're excited about or that you talk to your friends about; it's something that has had a real, describable effect on your perspective .

This doesn't mean that you should overemphasize how something absolutely changed your life , especially if it really didn't. Instead, try to be as specific and honest as you can about how the experience affected you, what it taught you, or what you got out of it.

Let's go back to the TV idea. Sure, writing an essay about how excited you are for the new season of Stranger Things  probably isn't the quickest way to get yourself into college, but you could write a solid essay (in response to the first type of prompt) about how SpongeBob SquarePants was an integral part of your childhood. However, it's not enough to just explain how much you loved SpongeBob—you must also explain why and how watching the show every day after school affected your life. For example, maybe it was a ritual you shared with your brother, which showed you how even seemingly silly pieces of pop culture can bring people together. Dig beneath the surface to show who you are and how you see the world.

When you write about something you don't really care about, your writing will come out clichéd and uninteresting, and you'll likely struggle to motivate yourself. When you instead write about something that is genuinely important to you, you can make even the most ordinary experiences—learning to swim, eating a meal, or watching TV—engaging .

#3: Focus on Specifics

But how do you write an interesting essay? Focus.

Don't try to tell your entire life story or even the story of an entire weekend; 500–650 words may seem like a lot, but you'll reach that limit quickly if you try to pack every single thing that has happened to you into your essay. If, however, you just touch on a wide range of topics, you'll end up with an essay that reads more like a résumé.

Instead, narrow in on one specific event or idea, and talk about it in more depth . The narrower your topic, the better. For example, writing about your role as Mercutio in your school's production of Romeo and Juliet is too general, but writing about opening night, when everything went wrong, could be a great topic.

Whatever your topic, use details to help draw the reader in and express your unique perspective. But keep in mind that you don't have to include every detail of what you did or thought; stick to the important and illustrative ones.

#4: Use Your Own Voice

College essays aren't academic assignments; you don't need to be super formal. Instead, try to be yourself. The best writing sounds like a more eloquent version of the way you talk .

Focus on using clear, simple language that effectively explains a point or evokes a feeling. To do so, avoid the urge to use fancy-sounding synonyms when you don't really know what they mean. Contractions are fine; slang, generally, is not. Don't hesitate to write in the first person.

A final note: you don't need to be relentlessly positive. It's OK to acknowledge that sometimes things don't go how you want—just show how you grew from that.

#5: Be Ruthless

Many students want to call it a day after writing a first draft, but editing is a key part of writing a truly great essay. To be clear, editing doesn't mean just making a few minor wording tweaks and cleaning up typos; it means reading your essay carefully and objectively and thinking about how you could improve it .

Ask yourself questions as you read: is the progression of the essay clear? Do you make a lot of vague, sweeping statements that could be replaced with more interesting specifics? Do your sentences flow together nicely? Do you show something about yourself beyond the surface level?

You will have to delete and rewrite (potentially large) parts of your essay, and no matter how attached you feel to something you wrote, you might have to let it go . If you've ever heard the phrase "kill your darlings," know that it is 100% applicable to college essay writing.

At some point, you might even need to rewrite the whole essay. Even though it's annoying, starting over is sometimes the best way to get an essay that you're really proud of.

What's Next?

Make sure to check out our other posts on college essays , including our step-by-step guide to how to write your college essay , our analysis of the Common App Prompts , and our collection of example essays .

If you're in need of guidance on other parts of the application process , take a look at our guides to choosing the right college for you , writing about extracurriculars , deciding to double major , and requesting teacher recommendations .

Last but not least, if you're planning on taking the SAT one last time , check out our ultimate guide to studying for the SAT and make sure you're as prepared as possible.

Alex is an experienced tutor and writer. Over the past five years, she has worked with almost a hundred students and written about pop culture for a wide range of publications. She graduated with honors from University of Chicago, receiving a BA in English and Anthropology, and then went on to earn an MA at NYU in Cultural Reporting and Criticism. In high school, she was a National Merit Scholar, took 12 AP tests and scored 99 percentile scores on the SAT and ACT.

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3 exemplos de personal statement

Você sabe como escrever uma declaração pessoal, que é pedida por muitas faculdades de pós-graduação no exterior? Se não, analisar alguns modelos bem-sucedidos pode ajudar! Pensando nisso, trouxemos aqui 3 exemplos de personal statement, para que você possa entender os elementos necessários, praticar em casa e se inspirar para escrever o seu! Vamos lá?

O que é um personal statement?

Antes de partirmos para os exemplos, no entanto, é preciso entender bem o que é um personal statement . Esse texto é uma redação que você escreve para mostrar aos avaliadores do processo seletivo da faculdade quem você é e por que merece ser admitido naquela instituição. É importante notar que, ao contrário do "college essay", esse termo é mais utilizado para cursos de pós-graduação .

Exemplos de personal statement:

1. personal statement para um mestrado em estudos japoneses:.

Word count: 500

Japanese has never come easily to me. Honestly, it’s a brutal language to learn. But despite the countless challenges I’ve faced, I’ve devoted more than half of my life to learning it. Sure, I’ve experienced the occasional outburst; I’ve sobbed because I couldn’t understand a Japanese sentence, no matter how hard I tried to dissect it. I’ve also cursed. A lot. The journey to fluency is tough. But I can’t imagine a life without Japanese—and I don’t think I’d ever want to. 

I took my first Japanese class when I was twelve. Initially, my interest in the language was superficial; I loved anime and manga and thought Spanish was boring. Over time, however, I developed a far deeper connection to Japanese culture. But despite my growing passion for Japan, my career goals remained convoluted. I knew I wanted to write and translate, but what exactly? On top of that, I was still a somewhat taciturn conversationalist. And as for kanji, well, let’s just say kanji and I have a rocky relationship. 

After studying Japanese for five years in junior high and high school, I entered college and declared a double major in English and East Asian languages and cultures. I received As in my Japanese classes, but I couldn’t shake the feeling I was an impostor. After all, I wasn’t really good at Japanese; I was just good at doing homework. It was a feeling I’d harbored for years. 

And then things changed. 

My junior year I studied abroad in Osaka for a semester, where I spoke exclusively in Japanese with a wonderfully supportive host family. I also discovered my passion for Japanese literature. Suddenly, life was making sense. 

A year later, I received my bachelor’s degree and left for Japan again, this time as an English teacher on the JET Program. Sitting alone in an old tatami room, in a town where virtually nobody spoke English, I started to visualize a future for me: I was going to improve my Japanese and steadily forge a path toward professional translation. In the two years I lived in Kyushu, I devoted myself to the language and culture around me. Occasionally, I attempted a Japanese novel but became frustrated by the deluge of unfamiliar kanji. Still, I kept going. I took the JLPT N2 twice—failing first by two points and then by one point—before finally passing it six months later. A week ago I braved N1. 

Here’s the thing: I am not a prodigy, nor am I particularly gifted at Japanese. As much as I love the language, there will always be a kanji I’ll struggle to recall, a word I can’t pronounce (hint: it starts with 店 and ends with 員). What I am, however, is passionate, creative, and ambitious. I’m a lover of stories and languages. Japanese is the path I want to take, the career I strive for, the language I speak—and the life, no matter how challenging, I intend to live.

Por que esse é um bom exemplo de personal statement?

Para esse processo seletivo de um mestrado em Estudos Japoneses, o candidato teve que enviar um statement of purpose descrevendo seus objetivos acadêmicos e sua experiência com a língua japonesa e um personal statement separado, descrevendo sua relação pessoal com os estudos japoneses e o que o levou a buscar um mestrado.

Aqui estão os principais pontos fortes desse personal statement:

• Um começo que chama a atenção: o candidato começa com a afirmação de que o japonês nunca foi fácil para ele e que é uma língua “brutal” de se aprender . Visto que esta é uma aplicação para um programa de Estudos Japoneses, este é um começo intrigante que faz o leitor querer seguir em frente na leitura.
• Uma narrativa envolvente: a partir desse início que chama a atenção, o candidato constrói uma narrativa bem estruturada e dramática, traçando seu envolvimento com a língua japonesa ao longo do tempo. O momento decisivo nessa narrativa foi sua experiência de intercâmbio, que o levou a ter certeza de seus planos. Vendo como o candidato quer ser tradutor da literatura japonesa, a estrutura narrativa compacta utilizada é uma ótima maneira de mostrar suas habilidades de escrita.
• Exemplos específicos que mostram características importantes: O candidato demonstra uma relação profunda com o japonês por meio de exemplos do seu envolvimento com a língua e a sua determinação e ética de trabalho, destacando os desafios que ele enfrentou (e superou) no estudo do idioma. Isso dá a impressão de que ele é um aluno engajado e dedicado.

No geral, esse é um exemplo de personal statement muito forte, tanto em termos de estilo quanto de conteúdo. Ele flui bem, é memorável e comunica que o candidato aproveitaria ao máximo a experiência da pós-graduação.

2. Personal statement para um mestrado em Composição Musical:

My educational background had an extremely strong impact on my development and interests, and consequently influenced my decision to pursue graduate studies in Composition at the University of XXX. I was fortunate enough to grow up in a community where there was an abundance of educational opportunities. The public school system in my town is known for is academic rigor, and I took full advantage of this as a student, taking as many advanced courses and electives as I was allowed. The more that I learned, the more determined I was to continue learning, through college and beyond. At YYY College, I eagerly seized the chance to take classes in as many different areas as possible. While I flourished in the liberal arts environment, however, I found myself slowly drawn into the Music Department, unable to resist the combination of interesting classes and talented professors. I had begun to compose before entering college, but it was only through my studies at YYY that I realized how strong my passion for music truly was. 

My family and the musical environment fostered therein also had an enormous impact on my development. Of the extended family I knew, many were talented musicians; the most dedicated of these was my cousin Marcus, whose conversion from Catholicism to Judaism was primarily motivated by his desire to become a cantor. In addition to being surrounded by living musical relatives, I grew up knowing that music had been central to my family from their first arrival in America. My great-great-uncle Giacomo Ferrari was born in 1912 in Neverland, NY, the youngest of four sons. His parents had emigrated from Italy with his two eldest brothers in the early 1900s in search of a better life in America. Their struggles as immigrants are in themselves inspiring, but the challenges they faced are undoubtedly similar to those that many other immigrant families had to overcome; because of this, the actions that my relatives embarked upon are that much more extraordinary. Giacomo’s oldest brother Antonio, my great-grandfather, decided to take a correspondence course in violin, and to teach his youngest brother Giacomo how to play as well. Giacomo Ferrari eventually became an accomplished violinist and started a free “Lunchtime Strings” program for all the elementary schools in the Neverland area, giving free violin lessons and monthly concerts. As a native English speaker who has had the privilege of studying viola and violin with trained, private teachers, I can only imagine the perseverance it took for my great-grandfather and great-great uncle to learn an instrument like the violin out of booklets and lessons that were not even written in their native language. Their passion and dedication to learning something new, something not part of their lives as bluecollar, immigrant workers, and their desire to share it with others, has inspired me as a musician and a person. It is this spirit that has motivated me to pursue an MA at Composition at the University of XXX.

Esse personal statement para um mestrado em Composição Musical discute os fatores que motivam a candidata a fazer pós-graduação.

• A candidata fornece duas razões claras que a motivam a buscar a pós-graduação: suas experiências com a música enquanto crescia e a história musical de sua família. Em seguida, ela apoia essas duas razões com exemplos e análises.
• A descrição do envolvimento de seus ancestrais com a música é muito atraente e memorável. A candidata descreve seu próprio envolvimento com a música como quase inevitável, com base na longa história de sua família com atividades musicais.
• A candidata faz uma análise cuidadosa dos seus privilégios, que lhe permitiram estudar música por tanto tempo e com tanta profundidade. Percebemos que ela é perspicaz e empática, qualidades que agregariam muito a qualquer comunidade acadêmica.

Esse é um exemplo de personal statement forte e que cumpre o que é esperado dele. E na verdade, dado que é voltado para um mestrado em Composição Musical, outros elementos da aplicação (como amostras de trabalho) são provavelmente mais importantes. No entanto, aqui estão duas pequenas mudanças que poderiam ser feitas para melhorá-lo:

• Dividir o segundo parágrafo em 2 ou 3 outros, menores. Ela poderia usar um parágrafo para orientar o leitor sobre a história musical da família, um parágrafo para discutir Giacomo e Antonio e um parágrafo para discutir como a família a influenciou. Do jeito que está, é um pouco arrastado e o segundo parágrafo não tem um foco super claro, embora esteja vagamente relacionado à história da família da candidata com a música.
• Encurtar um pouco a história sobre os ancestrais da candidata e falar mais sobre como essa história familiar motivou o interesse dela pela música. De que maneiras específicas a perseverança de seus ancestrais a inspirou? Ela pensava neles durante as pesadas sessões de treinos? Ela está interessada em compor música em um estilo que eles possam ter tocado? Exemplos mais específicos aqui dariam uma maior profundidade e clareza ao personal statement.

3. Personal statement para um mestrado em Saúde Pública:

For twenty-three years, my grandmother (a Veterinarian and an Epidemiologist) ran the Communicable Disease Department of a mid-sized urban public health department. The stories of Grandma Betty doggedly tracking down the named sexual partners of the infected are part of our family lore. Grandma Betty would persuade people to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases, encourage safer sexual practices, document the spread of infection and strive to contain and prevent it. Indeed, due to the large gay population in the city where she worked, Grandma Betty was at the forefront of the AIDS crises, and her analysis contributed greatly towards understanding how the disease was contracted and spread. My grandmother has always been a huge inspiration to me, and the reason why a career in public health was always on my radar. 

Recent years have cemented that interest. In January 2012, my parents adopted my little brother Fred from China. Doctors in America subsequently diagnosed Fred with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD). My parents were told that if Fred’s condition had been discovered in China, the (very poor) orphanage in which he spent the first 8+ years of his life would have recognized his DMD as a death sentence and denied him sustenance to hasten his demise. 

It is not right that some people have access to the best doctors and treatment while others have no medical care. I want to pursue an MPH in Sociomedical Sciences at Columbia because studying social factors in health, with a particular focus on sociohealth inequities, will prepare me to address these inequities. The interdisciplinary approach of the program appeals to me greatly as I believe interdisciplinary approaches are the most effective way to develop meaningful solutions to complex problems. 

My undergraduate education has prepared me well for my chosen career. Understanding the underlying structure of a group’s culture is essential to successfully communicating with the group. In studying folklore and mythology, I’ve learned how to parse the unspoken structures of folk groups, and how those structures can be used to build bridges of understanding. For example, in a culture where most illnesses are believed to be caused by witchcraft, as is the case for the Zande people of central Africa, any successful health intervention or education program would of necessity take into account their very real belief in witchcraft. 

I now work in the healthcare industry for one of the largest providers of health benefits in the world. In addition to reigniting my passion for data and quantitative analytics, working for this company has immersed me in the business side of healthcare, a critical component of public health. 

I intend to pursue a PhD in order to become an expert in how social factors affect health, particularly as related to gender and sexuality. I intend to pursue a certificate in Sexuality, Sexual Health, and Reproduction. Working together with other experts to create effective interventions across cultures and societies, I want to help transform health landscapes both in America and abroad.

• Esse personal statement está bem organizado. Quase todos os parágrafos têm um foco e uma mensagem distintos, e quando há uma mudança de foco, há também a mudança para um novo parágrafo, com transições lógicas.
• O personal statement cobre muita coisa em um espaço muito curto . A autora discute sua história familiar, seus objetivos, sua formação educacional e sua formação profissional. Mas, como os parágrafos são organizados e ela usa exemplos específicos, não parece muito vago ou disperso.
• Além de incluir informações sobre as motivações pessoais, como família, ela também inclui algumas análises (com exemplos) sobre como adaptar as intervenções de saúde. Essa é uma boa maneira de mostrar que tipo de ideias ela pode levar para o programa de pós-graduação, com base em sua formação acadêmica.

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Você quer se preparar para escrever um personal statement de verdade em um processo seletivo para uma universidade no exterior? Então entre em contato com a gente! Nós podemos te ajudar a conquistar sua oportunidade internacional através da nossa mentoria especializada . Quer saber como? Então clique aqui para fazer o nosso teste de perfil e entrar para o nosso time de mentorados.

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What to include in a Personal Statement

Personal Statement Tips

What you need to include in your personal statement.

Ready to start your personal statement, but unsure where to begin? Crafting a compelling personal statement is crucial when applying for admission to your desired course.

Your personal statement is the opportunity to show universities who you are, your ambitions and why you’re passionate about the course you’re applying for. Before you dive into writing, it’s good to understand what you should include in your personal statement to make the most of the 4000-character count.

The purpose of your personal statement

Your personal statement is there to show admissions tutors why you’d be a good student for the course you’re applying for and what sets you apart from other candidates.

University admissions tutors tend to look for similar things in your personal statement: a bit about yourself, information about your aspirations and how they link to your chosen course, why you’re interested in the course, and specific skills you already have that will support you in your studies.

What to include in your personal statement

Before diving into writing your personal statement, create a plan of what you want to include and a breakdown of the topics you want to cover. This will help you write more concisely and confidently.

A bit about you, your hobbies and interests

This is a great opportunity to introduce yourself – share information about yourself, your background and any life experiences that have shaped your interest in your course. It’s great to include information that isn’t just education-related too! Tell them a bit about your hobbies and interests beyond your studies.

This is also a great way to flex more of your skills! Many of these could relate back to your subject. For example, keen readers, you could discuss your love for a book you enjoyed recently – a great way for prospective English Literature students to show that they look at the subject beyond the classroom.

Express your passion for the subject

Of course, they want to understand why you want to apply to the specific subject and also see that you are passionate about it too. If there are any areas of the subject that sparked your interest, and you’re looking forward to exploring more, this is the perfect chance to share!

Show off your key skills

Admissions tutors aren’t only interested in your academic achievements, but also other skills you have gained that could be applied to your studies. Give examples of where you’ve used organisational skills, solved a problem or effectively communicated with someone. This will help admissions tutors see how you’d fit in among the other students on campus.

This is also a subtle way of showing your hobbies and interests. If your key skills have been best communicated in a football match, a swimming meet or in a debating society, then show how your passion for these hobbies has manifested in the use of key skills.

Share your achievements

The admissions tutor will receive your predicted grades and recommendation letters alongside your application, so don’t feel you need to share this with them in your personal statement too. Instead, focus on expanding on specific areas of your studies that you have excelled in and the different skills they’ve given you and can be applied to your chosen course.

You can also talk about any achievements. This could be educational awards you’ve won, as well as achievements outside of school.

Writing your personal statement

Now you have all the ingredients, it’s time to get writing! The structure of your statement is just like any essay. Start with a compelling introduction that grabs the reader’s attention and gives an overview of what you’ll be talking about. The majority of your personal statement with then be made up of paragraphs that discuss the specific topics outlined in your plan. To finish, round off your statement with a conclusion. Summarise the key points and show, again, your enthusiasm for applying to the subject.

Some students find that it's easier to write the introduction last. This is a better way of summarising information you already know will pop up later.

With careful thought and planning of what to include and making sure the essential areas are included will be the start of you crafting a fantastic personal statement. If you’re looking for a helping hand, our personal statement examples can help you visualise what your personal statement can look like.

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Last updated March 5, 2024

Every piece we write is researched and vetted by a former admissions officer. Read about our mission to pull back the admissions curtain.

Blog > Common App , Essay Examples , Personal Statement > 15 Amazing Personal Statement Examples (2024 Update)

15 Amazing Personal Statement Examples (2024 Update)

Admissions officer reviewed by Ben Bousquet, M.Ed Former Vanderbilt University

Written by Kylie Kistner, MA Former Willamette University Admissions

Key Takeaway

What’s that old saying? “The best way to learn is by doing.” Well, we believe that, in personal statements and in life, cliches like this should be avoided. For some people, the best way to start writing a personal statement is indeed just to start.

But for most writers, jumping right into the writing process is a daunting task. If you’ve never written a personal statement before, then how do you know where to begin?

That’s where example essays come in. There are millions of opinions in the college admissions world about whether or not students should read example essays. But here’s ours:

You absolutely should be reading example personal statements.

Let’s get into it.

Why you should read example personal statements

Reading example personal statements helps you understand why they work (or don’t work) in the admissions process.

Now, the point of reading them isn’t to copy them. It’s not even necessarily to be inspired by them.

Instead, the point of reading examples is to know what personal statements look like. Think about it: if you’d never seen a children’s book before, would you know how to write one? Probably not! Same goes for personal statements.

In this post, we show you some exceptional, solid, and need-to-be-improved personal statements.

And to help you understand how these essays function as personal statements, we’ve also gotten our team of former admissions officers to grade and provide feedback on each.

What does an admissions officer look for in a personal statement?

Before we get to the essays, let’s briefly walk through what goes through an admissions officer’s head when they open an application.

Admissions officers (AOs) read hundreds to thousands of applications in a single year. Different institutions require admissions officers to use different criteria when evaluating applications, so the specifics will vary by school. Your entire application should cohere to form a seamless narrative . You'll be crafting that narrative across the following categories:

• Transcripts and course rigor : AOs look at the classes you’ve taken to assess how much you’ve challenged yourself based on the classes your school offers. They’re also looking at how well you've done in these classes each term.
• Extracurricular activities : When reading through your activities list, AOs look at the activities you’ve done, how many years you’ve participated in them, and how many hours a week you devote to them. They’re assessing your activities for the levels of magnitude, impact, and reach that they demonstrate. (Want to know more about these terms? Check out our extracurricular impact post .)
• Background information : This background information briefly tells admissions officers about demographic and family information, your school context, and any honors or awards you’ve received.
• Letters of recommendation : Letters of recommendation give AOs insight into who you are in the classroom.
• Essays : And, finally, the essays. Whether you’re writing a personal statement or a supplemental essay , essays are the main place AOs get to hear your voice and learn more about you. Your personal statement in particular is the place where you get to lay out your overall application narrative and say something meaningful about your personal strengths.

So, with all that in mind, what does an admissions officer actually look for when reading your personal statement?

A few traits tend to surface across the best personal statements, no matter the topic or format. There are four primary areas you should focus on as you craft your personal statement.

• Strengths : AOs want to know about your strengths. That doesn’t mean bragging about your accomplishments, but it does mean writing about a topic that lets you showcase something positive about yourself.
• Personal meaning : Personal statements shouldn’t be fluff. They shouldn’t be history essays. They should be personal essays that ooze meaning. The topic you choose should show something significant about yourself that the admissions officers won’t get from any other part of your application.
• Authenticity and vulnerability : These characteristics can be the most difficult to achieve. Being “vulnerable” doesn’t mean airing all your dirty laundry. It means revealing something authentic and meaningful about who you are. To be vulnerable means to go beyond the surface level to put yourself out there, even to admissions officers who you’ve never met.
• Clear organization and writing : And lastly, admissions officers also want your essay to be organized clearly so it’s easy to follow along. Remember that admissions officers are reading lots of applications, even in one sitting. So you want to make your reader’s job as easy as possible. Thoughtful and skillful writing can also help take your personal statement to the next level.

If you want to know more about how to incorporate these traits into your own essay, we have a whole guide about how to write the perfect personal statement .

But for now, let’s get into the examples.

We’ve broken up the example personal statements into three categories: best personal statement examples, good personal statement examples, and “bad” personal statement examples. These categories show you that there is a spectrum of what personal statements can look like. The best examples are the gold standard. They meet or exceed all four of the main criteria admissions officers are looking for. The good examples are just that: good. They’re solid examples that may be lacking in a specific area but are still effective personal statements. The “bad” examples are those that don’t yet stack up to the expectations of a personal statement. They’re not objectively bad, but they need some specific improvements to align with what admissions officers are looking for.

Here we go!

The Best Personal Statement Examples

Writing an exceptional personal statement takes a lot of time and effort. Even the best writers can find the genre challenging. But when you strike the perfect chord and get it right, it’s almost like magic. Your essay jumps off the page and captures an admissions officer’s attention. They feel like you’re right there with them, telling them everything they need to know to vote “yes” on your admission.

The following essays are some of our favorites. They cover a range of topics, styles, and student backgrounds. But they all tell meaningful stories about the writers’ lives. They are well-organized, use vivid language, and speak to the writers’ strengths.

For each essay, our team of former admissions officers have offered comments about what makes the essay exceptional. Take a look through the annotations and feedback to see what lessons you can apply to your own personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #1: Thankful

My family has always been broke. Saturday mornings and Thursday evenings, always the same drill: the kids (my brothers and me) would be loaded in the car with my parents and off we’d all go to the food pantry. New clothes were few and far between, and going on vacation was something that we could only dream of. Despite our financial struggles, one year, my parents decided to surprise us with a trip to Disney Land. It was a complete shock to me and my siblings. We were over the moon. In fact, the screams of excitement that emanated from my younger brother’s mouth still ring in my ears.

But as the trip drew close, my excitement tempered and I began to worry. Being poor when you’re young doesn’t just affect you materially. It also affects how you see the world and loads you up with a whole range of anxieties that, in an ideal world, no child should have to face. How were my parents going to afford this, I wondered? Would an expense like this push us over the brink?(( The beginning of this essay, and especially this sentence, show the writer’s empathy. They are not selfish; they understand their broader family context and take that into consideration.)) I didn't want to ruin the surprise by asking, but I couldn't shake the feeling of dread building inside of me.

The day of our trip arrived and we set off for the airport. In the car, my dad made an off-the-cuff comment about a new video game that he’d wanted to play but didn’t buy, and everything clicked—my parents had made the trip possible by saving for months, cutting back on expenses and sacrificing their own comforts to make the trip happen.

As we boarded the plane, I was filled with a mix of emotions. I was grateful beyond words for my parents' sacrifice, but I was also overwhelmed by the guilt of knowing that they had given up so much for us. I didn't know how to express my gratitude; when we deplaned in LAX, I gave my mom and dad a rib-crushing hug.

The trip itself was everything that I had dreamed of and more. We spent four magical days at Disney Land(( Nice use of vivid details here. The reader can picture the sights and smells of Disney—and the ensuing hunger when passing a churro stand.)) , speed running the roller coasters and campy boat rides from the 70s. Sure, we packed our own food and walked right by the churro stands with a hungry look in our eyes. But I will never forget the feeling of unmitigated joy that my family shared on that trip, the smiles that painted my parents’ faces.

But the trip itself was nothing compared to the gratitude I felt for my parents(( Here, the writer transitions to reintroducing the theme of gratitude.)) . They had given us the gift of a lifetime, and I knew that I would never be able to repay them for their sacrifice.

In the years since that trip, I have carried that feeling of gratitude with me. It has motivated me to work hard and to always strive to be the best person that I can be. I want to make my parents proud and to show them that their sacrifice was worth it(( Finally, the writer sums things up with an eye to the future. It’s helpful for an admission officer to picture what the essay’s lessons might mean for the student as a future community member.)) .

I will never be able to fully express my gratitude for what my parents did for us, but I will always remember their selflessness and their willingness to put their own needs aside for the sake of our happiness. It was a truly surprising and incredible act of love, and one that I will always be thankful for.

AO Notes on Thankful

This essay accomplishes a few things even though it essentially tells one story and offers a quick reflection. It gives some important context regarding the challenges of being from a lower-income family. It does that in a way that is authentic, rather than problem-focused. It also shows that the writer is empathetic, family-oriented, and reflective.

Why this essay stands out:

• Vulnerability : This essay is upfront about a challenging topic: financial insecurity. While you don’t have to tell your most difficult challenge in an essay, this writer chose to write about a circumstance that gives additional context that may be helpful as admissions considers their application.
• Personal : The writer gets into some family dynamics and paints a picture of how their family treats and takes care of each other.
• Values: We clearly see some values the writer has and that they don’t take their parents’ sacrifices for granted. As an admission officer, I can picture this student using their education to give back—to their family or to others.

Personal Statement Example #2: Pickleball

I’ve always been one to have a good attitude no matter the circumstances. Except when it comes to exercise. From dodgeball in PE class to family Turkey Trots, I’m always the first one out and the last one across the finish line. These realities aren’t from a lack of skill—I’m actually quite coordinated and fast. They are from a lack of effort(( This is a quick hit of… either humor or vulnerability. I chuckled at the blunt honesty, and am intrigued to learn more.)) . Despite my best intentions, I can never get myself to care about sports or competitions. So when my dad first asked me to be his pickleball partner last summer, I did nothing but laugh.

But soon, I realized that he was serious. My dad started playing pickleball two years ago as a fun way to exercise. He’d become a star in our city’s recreation league, and I always enjoyed cheering him on from the sidelines. When his doubles partner got relocated for work, my dad decided that the disruption was a good opportunity for us bond through pickleball. Even though I was mortified by the thought of running back and forth to hit a bouncing ball, I reluctantly agreed.

The next Saturday morning, we went to the court for our first practice. I was wearing sweatpants, an old sweatshirt, and a grimace. My dad showed me how to hold the paddle, serve, and return the ball to our opponents. He told me about staying out of the kitchen—an endearing pickleball term that references the “kitchen,” or the middle part of the court—trying to make me laugh. Instead, I sighed impatiently and walked to my end of the court, ready to get it over with.

My dad remained patient in spite of my bad attitude. He gently served me the ball, and I gave a lackluster attempt to return it. The ball bounced into the net. I hadn’t even made it to his side of the court. Trying his best to encourage me, my dad gave me the ball so I could serve it to him instead. I tossed the ball up and hit it underhand toward my dad. It hit the net again. I tried again and again, each attempt with less care than the last. I grew frustrated and threw my paddle down in anger(( Okay, this paragraph gives a good dose of openness to the emotions of the writer. They’ve served up an opportunity to learn a lesson soon…)) .

After seeing my mini-meltdown, my dad crossed the kitchen to talk to me. During our conversation, I began to ask myself why I got so frustrated when I wasn’t trying very hard in the first place. I thought pickleball was a miserable sport, but I realized that it wasn’t pickleball that I cared about. I cared about my dad. I wanted to make him proud(( Ah, and there it is! A realization. As the admission officer I’m thinking, “Go on…”)) . Playing pickleball with him was the least I could do to thank him for everything he’d done for me. I dusted off my bad attitude alongside my paddle, and I got up to try another serve.

That serve hit the net again. But more determined now, I kept trying until my serves went over the net and through my dad’s weak side. I couldn’t believe it. My attitude adjustment helped me see the game for what it was: a game. It wasn’t supposed to be agonizing or cruel. It was supposed to be fun.

I learned that my attitude towards sports was unacceptable. This experience taught me that it’s okay to have preferences about what you enjoy, but it’s important to always maintain a positive attitude(( And the lesson learned! )) . You may just enjoy it after all.

Now my dad and I are both stars in our recreation league. Soon, we will make our way to our league’s semi-finals. We’ve worked our way through the bracket and are close to the championship. What I appreciate more about this experience, however, is how close it’s brought my dad and I together. His patience, positivity, and persistence have and will always inspire me. I want to be more like him every day, especially on the pickleball court.

AO Notes on Pickleball

This is a strong “attitude adjustment” essay, a bit of a remix of a challenge essay. The challenge, in this case, was a fixed mindset about sports that needed to be adjusted. The writer takes us on a witty journey through their own attitude towards organized athletic activities and their father.

• Self-aware : Similar to the vulnerability of other essays, this writer is willing to criticize themselves by recognizing that they need an attitude adjustment. Even before they changed their attitude, we get the sense that they are at least aware of their own lack of effort.
• Strong conclusion : We see a nice lesson at the end that relates both to having an open mind and caring for others. They even make a point about simply enjoying things because they are fun.
• Life lesson : Beyond the stated lesson, as an admission officer with a few more years on this Earth than the writer, I can tell this lesson will apply beyond sports. In fact, I can easily picture this student trying a new class, club, or group of friends in college because they are now more open to novel experiences.

Personal Statement Example #3: The Bird Watcher

I’m an avid walker and bird watcher(( Okay, the writer gets right into it! I think this simple introduction of the topic works well because they are writing about a less common hobby among teenagers. If they had said “I am an avid baseball player”, I would have been less eager to learn more.)) . Growing up, I’d clear my head by walking along the trail in the woods behind my house. By the time I was immersed in the chaos of high school, these walks became an afternoon routine. Now, every day at three o’clock, I don my jacket and hiking shoes and set off. As I walk, I note the flora and fauna around me. The wind whispering through the trees, the quiet rustling of a chipmunk underfoot, and the high-pitched call of robins perched atop branches, all of it brings me back to life after a difficult day.

And recently, the days have been more difficult than not. My grandparents passing, parents divorcing, and doctor diagnosing me with ADHD have presented me with more challenges than I’ve ever experienced before. But no matter what’s going on in my life, the wildlife on my walks brings me peace. As an aspiring ornithologist, the birds are my favorite(( This paragraph accomplishes a lot: a montage of difficult circumstances, context for their application, and declares their future career.)) .

I became interested in ornithology during long childhood afternoons spent at my grandparents’ house. They would watch me while my parents finished up work. I’d listen to the old bird clock that hung on the wall in the kitchen. Each number on the clock corresponded with a different bird. Every hour, the clock would chirp rather than chime. When the cardinal sang, I knew my parents would be arriving soon. Those chirps are all seared into my memory.

Twelve o’clock: robin. The short, fast, almost laugh-like sound of the robin always makes me hungry. All those Saturday afternoons filled with laughter and good food have resulted in a Pavlovian response. I’d cook meatballs with my grandma, splashing sauce on her floral wall paper. We’d laugh and laugh and enjoy the meal together at her plastic-covered kitchen table. This wasn’t my home, but I felt at home just the same.

Three o’clock: blue jay. It’d chime as soon as we walked in the door after school. The blue jay was my grandpa’s favorite. It was also mine. Why he loved it, I’m not completely sure. But it was my favorite because it marked the beginning of the best parts of my day. Symbolizing strength and confidence, blue jays always remind me of my grandpa.

Six o’clock: cardinal. The sharp whistle and staccato of the cardinal indicated that it was almost time for me to leave. Like the whistle of a closing shift, I’d hear it and start to pack my things. The cardinal has always been my least favorite.

Nine o’clock: house finch. The high, sweet, almost inquisitive call of the house finch was the one my grandma loved most. It was also the one I rarely heard. Either too early or too late in the day, the house finch was reserved for the occasional weekends when I’d spend the night at their house. My grandma would explain that finches symbolize harmony and peace. They are petite but mighty, just like she was(( This is a clever and sweet way of describing summer days with grandparents, while sprinkling in some vivid details to bring the story to life.)) .

This past weekend was the anniversary of my grandpa’s passing. Longing for my grandparents, I went for a walk. Winter is approaching, so the sky was darkening quickly. I walked slowly. As the sun set, I heard the tell-tale squawk of a blue jay, loud and piercing through the chill of the wind. I looked around and saw it sitting on an old stump, a small house finch behind it. I extracted my binoculars from my backpack, hoping to get a better glimpse through the dark. I turned the dial to focus the lenses, just as the birds flew away together. I took a deep breath, binoculars in hand, and continued on, spotting a robin in the distance(( The ending stylistically wraps the essay up without tying a bow on it. It’s a more artful way of concluding, and it works well here.)) .

AO Notes on Birdwatcher

This first two paragraphs are well-written and fairly to-the-point in their language. They do a nice job of setting the scene, but the third paragraph transitions into the writer’s distinctive voice. They detail the birds on the clock to chronicle the hours of their summer days and end, not without concluding, but leaving the reader wanting to read more of their stories.

• Voice: The writer transitions to writing in their own distinct voice, which comes to a crescendo in the final paragraph.
• Interesting approach: Sometimes students use an approach to tell a story that feels overly forced or cliche. This one feels organic and relates nicely to the writer, their family, and the story as a whole.
• Career path : This is far from a “What I want to be when I grow up” essay, but it clearly shows an academic interest grounded in family and childhood memories. This is an artistic and beautiful approach to showing admissions how the writer may use their college education.

Personal Statement Example #4: Chekov’s Wig

At the age of six, I starred in an at-home, one-woman production of Annie. My family watched as I switched between a wig I’d fashioned from maroon yarn, a dog’s tail leftover from Halloween, and a tie I’d stolen from my dad.

When the reveal came that Annie’s parents had actually passed away, I took a creative liberty: they had left Annie a small unicorn farm. The rest of the play proceeded as normal. When the curtain closed, I bowed to the sound of my family’s applause. But one set of hands was missing: my grandmother’s. Instead she sat, arms raised, and jokingly exclaimed, “But what about the unicorns?”(( Wow, an interesting intro! We see creativity and a silly side to the writer. As the admission officer, I’m eager to see where this leads.))

My grandma, an avid thespian, taught me a lot about life. But one of the most important lessons followed this production of Annie . After we laughed about her remark, she introduced me to the concept of Chekov’s gun. For Anton Chekov, brilliant playwright, the theory goes something like this: a writer shouldn’t write about a loaded gun if it’s not going to be fired. In other words, writers shouldn’t include details about something if it won’t serve a purpose in the story later. My unicorn farm had committed this writing faux pas egregiously.

I’m not a natural writer, and I have no goal to become one, but I’ve taken this concept of Chekov’s gun to heart—it forms the foundation of my life philosophy. I don’t believe that everything was meant to be(( This philosophical reflection is a nice introduction to the paragraphs that follow. )) . In fact, I think that sometimes bad things just happen. But I believe that these details will always play a part in our larger story.

The first test of my Chekov’s gun philosophy occurred shortly after Annie when my grandma, my biggest supporter, passed away. My family tried to console me saying that “it was her time to go,” but I disagreed. I couldn’t see how a death could be destined. Instead, I found comfort knowing that her presence, her support, and her death wasn’t for nothing. Like Chekov’s gun, I wasn’t quite sure how or why, but I knew that she would return for me.

As I grew older, my philosophy was tested time and again. Most recently, I fell back on Chekov’s gun as I coped with my parents’ divorce and my subsequent move to a new town. Both events shattered my world. My happy family theatre productions turned into custody hearings and overnight bags. The community I’d found at my old school became a sea of unfamiliar faces at my new one. None of this was meant to be. But as the writer of my own life, I won’t let the details become inconsequential.

I’ve used these events as plot points in my high school experience. Dealing with my parents’ divorce has taught me how to make the best of what’s given to me. I got the chance to decorate two bedrooms, live in both the suburbs and the city, and even have twice the amount of pets. And without the inciting incident of the divorce and move(( We see that the writer is able to make lemonade out of lemons here.)) , I never would have joined a new drama club or landed leading roles in Mama Mia and Twelfth Night. The divorce and move, like Chekov’s gun, have been crucial details in getting me where I’m at today.

I know that Chekov’s gun is more about the details in a story, but this philosophy empowers me to take what happens, the good and the bad, as part of my personal character development. Nothing would be happening if it weren’t important.

This summer, as we cleaned our garage in preparation for yet another move, I found my old Annie wig, yarn tangled from the box. Next to the wig was a note, handwritten in a script I’d recognize anywhere. My darling star, it read. You are going to go on to do great things. Love, Grandma ((And a sweet, or bittersweet, conclusion.)) .

AO Notes on Chekov’s Wig

This essay tells a beautiful story about a foundational philosophy in this young writer’s life. As their admission officer, I can see how grounded and positive they are. I can also imagine them taking this lesson to college: really paying attention to life, reflecting on the past, and understanding the value of even the smallest instances. There is an inherent maturity in this essay.

• Creativity: From the first few sentences, we can see that this student is now, and was as a child, creative. An original thinker.
• Reflective: When challenged by their grandmother, the writer didn’t insist that their way was correct. They took the criticism in stride and absorbed it as a salient life lesson. This shows open-mindedness and an uncommon level of maturity.
• Silver linings: It’s clear that this young writer has had some familial challenges that are likely familiar to some of you. They don’t gloss over them, but instead they learn from them. From having more pets to starring in the school musicals, there are lessons to glean from even life’s more difficult challenges.

Personal Statement Example #5: An Afternoon with Grandmother

The Buddhist temple on the hillside above my home has always possessed a deep power for me. With its towering spires and intricate carvings thousands of years old, it is a place of peace and serenity(( This writer opens with some wonderful imagery. I like how the imagery mirrors the meaning.)) —somewhere I can go to escape the chaos of the world and connect with myself and with my sense of spirituality. When my grandmother called me one January to let me know that she would be coming to visit, I smiled, my mind darting immediately to the temple and to the visit of it we would take together.

My relationship with my grandmother is a special one. After my parents passed away, she and my grandfather raised me for three years before I moved in with my father’s sister. In that time, she was my sole companion; she shared her recipes with me, told me stories, and most importantly, she taught me everything I know about spirituality. We spent countless nights staying up past bed-time, talking about the teachings of the Buddha, and she encouraged me gently to explore my own path to enlightenment(( This topic is accomplishing a lot: we see the writer’s relationship with their grandmother, their personal values, and their ideas about who they want to be in the future.)) .

When my grandmother finally arrived, I felt bathed in a warm glow. After catching up and preparing her favorite meal—red rice with miso soup and hot green tea—I told her about the plans I had for us to visit my special place.

Later that afternoon, as we entered the temple, I felt the calmness and tranquility wash over me. I took my grandmother's hand and led her to the main hall, where we knelt before the altar and began to recite the prayers and mantras that I had learned from her years before.

As we prayed, our voices joined together, echoing throughout the temple. A gentle rain began to fall outside and, as the cold crept around where we knelt, I was engulfed by a deep sense of connection with my grandmother and with the universe. It was as if the barriers between us were falling away, and we were becoming one—with each other, and with our shared connection to the divine.

We finished our prayers and sat in silence, lingering in the serenity of the temple. I could feel my grandmother's hand in mine, and I was filled with a sense of gratitude and love(( A great example of weaving vivid language with explicit reflection!)) .

Spirituality has been essential in my life. It gives me a sense of grounding and purpose, and it teaches me the value of compassion. My spirituality has also given me a way to connect with my grandmother on a deeper level—like a private language that only we speak together. In a world that can often feel chaotic and disconnected, faith and spirituality provide a sense of stability and connection.

As we left the temple, I held my grandmother's hand and felt suffused by a sense of peace and contentment. Too often people who are disconnected from spirituality misunderstand the role it plays in billions of people’s lives. They see it as a way to “check out” from the issues the world faces, ignoring their responsibilities to others. This may be true for others, but not me. Quite the opposite. My spirituality helps me empathize with others(( Wonderful reflection.)) ; it helps me focus on the obligations we each have to every other person and creature on this planet. For me, it is the ultimate way to “check in” to the needs of the world and my community in a way that grounds me emotionally.

Spirituality offers a way to find meaning and purpose in life, and to connect with something greater than ourselves. For that, and for my grandmother, I am truly grateful.

AO Notes on An Afternoon with Grandmother

In this deeply reflective essay, the writer uses spirituality and their relationship with their grandmother to reveal a very personal part of themselves. The writer isn’t afraid to be vulnerable, and they clearly showcase strengths of wisdom and compassion.

• Vivid language: This author is a talented writer who has included a bunch of vivid language. But it’s not over the top. They include just enough to hold a reader’s attention and add some interest.
• Reflection: The reflection throughout this essay is excellent. Notice how it’s not just at the beginning or the end. It’s woven throughout. The writer follows up each major detail with an explanation of why it’s personally meaningful.
• Conclusion: The conclusion combines vivid language and reflection perfectly. By the end of the essay, we know exactly what the writer wants us to take away: spirituality is personally meaningful to them because it helps them connect with the people around them. And I especially like how the writer chose to end on a note of gratitude—always a good value to have in a personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #6: Rosie’s

While most people find their lowest point at rock bottom, I found mine in an Amerikooler DW081677F-8(( We’re definitely off to an odd start. I’m curious where this is headed!)) . With drops rolling down my back and my cheeks, I snuck into the walk-in freezer for a moment of chill.

At that point, I had worked at Rosie's for nearly a year. The job was a good one: it fit with my school schedule, paid well, and introduced me to close friends. But as a workplace, Rosie’s was pure chaos. The original owners passed on a host of problems the new owners were working hard to fix. But the problems ran deep. From an inefficient kitchen organization to a malfunctioning scheduling software, we never knew what to do or when.

The day I found myself in the Amerikooler was the day everything caught up with us(( This is a good transitional phrase that helps readers navigate this fairly complex narrative.)) . An error in our scheduling software led to us operating with only 30% of our typical team. As the only waitress on duty, I ran between the kitchen and the guests, stopping mid-delivery to put new vegetables in the steamers. The kitchen staff were barely getting through each dish before customers lost patience.

Then, in all the commotion, I dropped a plate of macaroni and cheese all over a customer. I apologized over and over again. I was embarrassed and ashamed. I couldn’t believe what I had done. I always tried to be one step ahead to give my customers the best service, so my mistake felt like an utter failure. After helping them clean up, I ran immediately to the freezer. I realized that something had to change.

In the Amerikooler, a pea and corn mix cool on my back, I considered my options. The easiest option was to quit. I could find another job, one that didn’t cause me so much stress. But quitting wouldn’t just mean giving up. It would mean accepting my failure. It would also mean abandoning the coworkers I had grown close to. Leaving them would only burden them more. While I knew it wasn’t my job to fix the restaurant, I knew that leaving wasn’t the answer either. Instead, I decided to focus on solutions(( I like the focus on solutions and action steps here!)) . I stood up from the cold, dirty freezer floor, dusted off my work pants, washed my hands, and got back to work.

Despite being the newest and youngest member of the Rosie’s staff, I recognized that I brought a new perspective to the workplace. Having spent the previous three summers scheduling volunteers for my local food drive, I used my organizing experience to devise a new scheduling system, one that didn’t rely on our outdated technology. I brought up the system at our weekly meeting, and after initial pushback, everyone agreed to give it a try. Three months later, my system keeps everyone happy and our kitchen and floor staffed.

But it wasn’t just the staffing problem that was the issue. Our workflows were inefficient, and we didn’t know how to communicate or collaborate effectively. I know that identifying an issue is always the first step to a solution, so I raised the question at our most recent staff meeting. Having earned my coworkers’ and bosses’ trust(( And here we see some good growth and leadership.)) , I led us in outlining a few new processes to streamline our productivity. In stark contrast to the failure I felt after spilling the macaroni and cheese, developing a new workflow with my coworkers made me proud. I hadn’t given in to the chaos, but I had worked thoughtfully and collaboratively to create new solutions.

I’m sure that won’t be my last time working in a disorganized environment or spilling macaroni and cheese. But I know that I’ll be ready to address whatever comes my way.

AO Notes on Rosie’s

If you’ve ever worked in a food establishment, then something in this essay will probably resonate with you. But I appreciate how the writer doesn’t get pulled into the negativity they experience. Instead, they focused their efforts (and their essay) on how they could make things better for everyone. That’s the kind of student admissions officers want to see on their campuses.

• Organization: The writer has to narrate and backtrack a bit at the beginning of the essay to make the introduction work. But it’s not confusing for a reader because they have very solid transitions. I also like how the action steps and reflection are organized in the narrative.
• Positive outlook: As an admissions officer, I would admire this student for their problem-solving skills. Working in that environment was surely tough, but they didn’t give up. They got to work and helped everyone out in the process.
• Humor: From the introduction to the conclusion, the writer incorporates subtle humor throughout. Because of it, we actually feel like we know the writer by the conclusion. Too much humor can overwhelm a personal essay, but just enough can help readers see who the writer really is.

Personal Statement Example #7: Gone Fishing

I pulled the line with my left hand and snapped the rod back with my right. The line split through the air above me like a knife through cake. I rigidly waved my right arm up and down to dry off my fly, which had started sinking from the weight of the water. Ready to cast, I loosened the grip on my left hand to release a few more feet of line, pulled my right arm back in a grandiose motion, and hammered it back down. I expected my line to fly out in front of me, gracefully floating back onto the surface of the water. Instead, I was met with a startling resistance. My fly had lodged itself into the bush behind me(( This opening paragraph has great vivid description. Here, we end on a moment of suspense that has left me intrigued about what will happen next.)) .

Annoyed, I waded through the tall, thick grass, rod under my arm and mosquitoes buzzing in my ears. This was the reality of fly fishing. In my short time as a fisherman, I’d caught far more trees, bushes, and riverweed than I had fish. What seems so elegant in movies like A River Runs Through It is actually a grueling process of trial and error. I took up flyfishing a year ago to conquer my fear of the outdoors(( Ah ha—we learn that this essay isn’t really about fly fishing. It’s about conquering a fear. And with that, we see that the stakes are high.)) . I could have (and probably should have) chosen a more mild activity like hiking or kayaking, but I’ve always been one to take on a challenge.

I had been afraid of the outdoors since childhood. Coming from a family that prefers libraries to parks and bed and breakfasts to tents, I never learned how to appreciate nature. I limited my time outside as much as I could. I feared the bugs, the sun, and the unknown.

I decided to try flyfishing when I realized I didn’t want to be controlled by my fear any longer(( As an AO, I would applaud this student’s bravery.)) . All the birthday parties I’d turned down, the memories that were made without me, I had missed out on so much. Being outside was an integral part of the human experience—or, at least, that’s what I’d been told. Without being willing to enjoy nature, I was missing out on what it meant to be myself.

Soon after this realization, I found an old rod in my grandpa’s garage and took it as a sign from the universe. On my first time out, my Honda Civic lurched over a ditch on the gravel road Google Maps had directed me to. I’d spent hours watching YouTube videos of proper technique. Stepping out of my car, I felt my skin crack under the dry heat, and I wanted to leave. But I continued on, walking through branches and over logs to the riverbank. I was doing it( More vivid detail that really gives us a sense of the writer’s discomfort—yet they’re persisting.)) .

I pushed myself to continue, no matter how uncomfortable I got. I went back, Saturday after Saturday, each time noticing improvements in my abilities. Along the way, I learned to push myself to do things that make me uncomfortable. I saw myself in a new light. I wasn’t Charlie, afraid of the outdoors. I was Charlie, fisherman.

The first time I caught a fish, I could hardly believe it. Thinking I had caught another piece of riverweed, I tugged on my line and rolled my eyes. But suddenly, it started tugging back. It was a sensation I’d never experienced before, one of haste, pride, and panic. I instantly collected myself, bracing against the bank as I secured the line with my finger and slowly pulled the fish ashore. Delicately removing my hook from its mouth, I admired its beauty. Whereas I had once feared creatures like this trout, I now respected it. Its holographic scales glistened in the sunlight. I thanked it for helping me grow, and I placed it back in the water. It swam away. I wiped the slime off my hands and picked up my rod, left hand tugging at the line, right hand snapping back again((This conclusion is quite long, but I really like this poetic ending. It shows so much growth, and there’s a subtle nod to the fact that the writer is continuing to fish.)) .

AO Notes on Gone Fishing

From all this imagery, I really felt like I was fishing alongside them. What’s better, I feel like I really get where this student is coming from because of their vulnerability. They show immense growth and open-mindedness, which is exactly what admissions officers are looking for.

• Imagery: This writer definitely likes creative writing. From the introduction, we can envision ourselves going on this journey with the writer. There is some excellent “show, don’t tell” here.
• Deep personal meaning: Biggest fears are hard to overcome, especially with such a good attitude. It’s clear that this topic is a meaningful one to the writer. Even the act of fly fishing, which they didn’t seem to like much at first, becomes a meaningful act.
• Narrative arc: We have a classic “going on a journey” essay, where the writer transforms on a journey from point A (being afraid of the outdoors) to point B (catching a fish). The writer’s implementation of this structure is excellent, which makes the essay easy to follow.

Good Personal Statement Examples

Even if your essay isn’t worthy of The New Yorker , you can still make your mark on admissions officers. Writing an essay that fulfills all the goals of a personal statement, whether or not it meets every single criterion an admissions officer is looking for, can still get you into a great college.

Most personal statements are good personal statements, so don’t worry if you’re feeling overwhelmed by the amazing essay examples you see online. The key to writing a good personal statement is writing your personal statement. Focus on finding a topic that lets you communicate your own meaning and voice, and you’ll be set.

The following examples are awesome personal statements. There may be a little room for improvement in places, but the essays do exactly what they need to do. And they say a lot about their writers. Let’s see what the writers and admissions officers have to say.

Personal Statement Example #8: Beekeeper’s Club

As I lift the heavy lid of the hive, the hum of thousands of bees fills my ears. I carefully smoke the entrance to calm the bees, and I begin to inspect the frames. The bees are busy at work, collecting nectar and pollen, and tending to their young. I am in awe of their organization.

I never would have thought that I, a high school student, would become a beekeeper(( An interesting hobby for a high school student! I’m intrigued to see where this is going.)) . But now it’s something I can’t imagine my life without.

It all started when I found a beekeeping suit at a garage sale two summers ago. At a mere five dollars, it was yellowing and musty, but it appeared to be fully intact and without any holes. I’ve lived many lives as a hobbyist, always willing to try new things. I’ve been a sailor, a gardener, a basketball player, a harpist, a rock climber, and more. The problem is that I can never manage to see these hobbies through(( I see. Here we get a sense of what’s at stake in this new venture. The problem is that writer can’t seem to hold down a hobby. Will beekeeping solve that problem? Let’s find out .)) . As a perpetual novice, I always lose interest or become overwhelmed by all the information. But that’s never stopped me from taking up a new hobby, so I brought the beekeeping suit to the make-shift register and handed the seller a five-dollar bill.

To embark on my new hobby, I first went to the library and read everything I could find about beekeeping. Research is always my first step when starting something new. I like to know what I’m in for. As I read, I became fascinated by the fact that such small creatures can serve such a critical role on our planet. I learned about the importance of bees for pollinating crops, and I read that their populations have been declining in recent years. I was determined to do my part to help. This wasn’t just a hobby anymore— it was a mission(( And the stakes just got higher.)) .

But like the bees I’d been reading about, I knew I couldn't do it alone. My years of abandoning hobbies had taught me that this time, I needed guidance from someone with experience. I knew the first place to look. At the farmer’s market that Saturday, I went straight to the honey stand and introduced myself. The vendor’s name was Jeremy, and he was excited to see someone so young taking up beekeeping. I asked if I could come see his hives sometime, and he agreed.

I showed up the next weekend with my used beekeeping suit in hand. Jeremy gave me a tour. I was astounded by the simultaneous simplicity and complexity. As the months went by, Jeremy became my mentor. He taught me the importance of monitoring the health of the hive, how to properly harvest honey, and even the ins and outs of the farmer’s market business.

I was grateful for his guidance and friendship. I found myself becoming more and more passionate about bees and the art of beekeeping.

After months of tending to my hive, I finally had it up and running. These bees were in my care(( The writer has shown us that they’ve learned a big lesson from their past failures: they need support and guidance. I’m impressed that this time they are making an intentional change.)) —this was one hobby I couldn’t abandon. With that knowledge and Jeremy’s support, one hive grew to five. I’m not in it for the money or even the honey. I’m in it for the bees, for the millimeter of difference I’m making in their lives and in the life of the earth.

Through beekeeping, I have found a community of people who share my love for bees. Jeremy, the bees, and the entire beekeeping community have taught me not to quit. We support each other, share tips and advice, and work together to help protect these important insects. And in the process, I have learned that I can take up any new hobby I want and stick with it if I just put in enough effort(( Yep—the writer has come out of this journey on the other side, having learned that their effort does pay off.)) .

AO Notes on Beekeeper’s Club

As an admissions officer, it’s always fun to read about students’ eccentric hobbies. I’d count this as one of them. But what’s better than learning about the hobby is seeing a student’s personal growth.

What makes this essay good:

• Personal journey: Most good personal statements show some kind of personal growth. In this case, we see that the writer has grown mature and aware enough to hold down a hobby. We see that it wasn’t an easy road, but they got there.
• Strengths: There are lots of strengths in this personal statement. We see self-awareness, initiative, teamwork, and care for the bees and the planet.
• Reflection: Part of what makes this personal journey so good is that the writer takes us on the journey with them through reflection. At each stage of the journey, we know exactly what the writer is thinking and feeling. By the end, we’re celebrating their success with them.

What the writer could do to level up:

• Personal meaning: Yep, “personal journey” and “personal meaning” can be two separate things. Although the writer goes on a great personal journey, the personal meaning seems to be lacking a bit. It’s clear that this is an important topic to the writer, but it doesn’t exactly come across as an especially vulnerable one. The writer could make it more vulnerable by incorporating more personal meaning into their reflection: what would it have meant if they had quit beekeeping too? What’s the problem with dropping hobbies in the first place? Why is it personally important to learn to stick with things?

Personal Statement Example #9: Ann

Pushing her blonde curls from her forehead, she pursed her lips in focus(( This vivid, detailed description really draws me in.)) . She sat with legs crossed across the kitchen chair. This was it: the moment she’d been preparing for. Her tiny hand gripped the pencil as if it were a stick of dynamite and twitched her fingers up, down, and back again. She looked up at me and smiled, teeth too big for her growing mouth. “Ann,” the paper read. As I glowed back at my mini-me, I saw in her my whole heart(( And here the focus switches from Ann to the writer—an important transition.)) .

My sister was technically an accident, born when I was eleven years old. But I know that, in the grand scheme of things, Ann’s existence was destined by the cosmos. Watching her write was like looking in a mirror. My hair has long since turned brown, but she and I deal with the same unmanageable curls. Her toothy grin developed over five years of mutual laughter. And she got that unwavering focus from watching me do my own homework each night. At the same time I’ve taught her the ways of the world, she’s taught me joy, patience, and persistence(( Lessons learned! This sentence really draws attention to the main theme. It could be a little more specific because “joy, patience, and persistence” are almost cliche.)) .

I had been an only child for my first decade of life. I remember being lonely and without purpose. With Ann came the opportunity to make a real impact on someone, even as a child myself. The night she was born, I vowed to protect her. I had never seen anyone so small and fragile, and I begged my parents to let me hold her. Next to mine, her hand looked like a doll’s. It was purple and pink from the ordeal of birth. Her eyes barely opened, but I couldn’t keep mine off her.

Many older siblings find their younger siblings to be nuisances. But Ann has always been my best friend. Her first two years of life, she struggled with health issues that scared us all. I felt helpless and afraid, but I knew I had to fight alongside her. I did everything I could: I grabbed diapers and bottles for my parents, I talked to her for hours on end, and, when she was old enough, I spoon fed her and encouraged her to eat. As Ann grew bigger and stronger, I grew stronger, too(( It sounds like this was a really difficult challenge for the writer and their family. I appreciate this picture we get of the writer in relation to Ann.)) .

Each year has gotten better than the previous. I was there to catch Ann when she took her first steps, teach her her first words, and get her dressed every day. She tagged behind me as I took photos before my first dance, got my learner’s permit, and went on my college tours. While being a teen with a toddler sibling wasn’t always perfect, Ann’s mere presence makes those around her feel loved and appreciated. She’s exactly who I aspire to be.

Watching her write her name at the kitchen table, I became overwhelmed with the thought of leaving her to head off to college. She still has so much to learn, so many ways to grow. But just as the thought entered my mind, she spoke in her high-pitched and innocent voice. “When you go to college,” she asked, “will you tell me about your classes?” I blinked away the tears gathering in my eyes, smoothed her curls with my hand, and pulled her in close.

Going to college won’t mean leaving Ann. It will mean opening her world—and mine—to endless new knowledge and possibilities. She’ll grow and change, and so will I. When we reunite, we’ll smile our toothy smiles and embrace each other, our curly hair intertwining. We’ll sit at the kitchen table, focused and laughing, like nothing has changed(( I like how the siblings are continuing to grow together, but at the end of the day, they still have their amazing relationship.)) .

AO Notes on Ann

I always find sibling essays like this one so sweet. It’s amazing how clearly we can understand someone solely through their interactions with a loved one. As an admissions officer, I would see that this student would be a great community member (and roommate!).

• Deeply meaningful: Especially with the family context, it’s apparent that this topic is deeply meaningful to the writer. Because it’s so meaningful a topic, the writer is able to show an immense amount of care for Ann without even trying. AOs love seeing traits like care, maturity, and the ability to grow.
• Clear message: Personal statements should have themes that encompass the main message the writer wants to convey. This essay’s message is clear as day: the writer is a better, happier, more generous person because of Ann. They are an awesome sibling.
• More about the self: This one’s tricky because we get an implicit sense of who the writer is now through the overall tone and meaning. But a lot of the personal examples the writer chose are old examples from childhood and early adolescence. Some of those are important to provide family context, but I still would have liked to get a more recent picture of the writer.

Personal Statement Example #10: Running through My Neighborhood

My mind and eyes began to wander as I turned the corner on my fourth mile. I’ve always been a runner. It's a way for me to relax and challenge myself. Running makes me feel like I’m one with the world around me. As I run, I can't help but be struck by the beauty of the buildings and people that make up my city. Each is a work of art—a carefully-crafted expression of my community. With every step, I feel a deep connection to the life around me(( This introduction covers a lot, so this last sentence could be a bit more specific.)) .

On my run, I find myself drawn to the intricate details of the buildings. I admire the way the light catches on centuries-old bricks, casting shadows that dance across the pavement below. I look up at the skyscraper windows that nearly touch the sky, frightened at the sight of window washers. Old and new, the buildings all carry stories.

In the same way, I admire the neighbors around me. I see them feeding pigeons, smiling at me as I pass by. They’re walking dogs and babies, talking on a park bench, and playing hopscotch. I run by them, fast but steady, and breathe it all in. I’m on this beautiful city block, surrounded by people whose whole lives are familiar yet mysterious, and I’m running.

But it's not just the aesthetic beauty of the buildings that grabs my attention. As I run, I find myself thinking about the stories and histories behind each one. I wonder about the people who built them, the families they had at home, the lives they led. I think about the people who have lived and worked in these buildings and the memories that have been made within their walls.

Take the local bakery, for instance. I’ve run by there a thousand times in my life, each time soaking up the smell of freshly-baked bread and pastries. The building seems unassuming at first, with a simple glass door and brick façade. But once you step foot inside, you’re immediately hit with the warmth of the staff and patrons. The old photos on the wall and cozy furniture that has been there since the bakery’s opening back in the 1950s—it feels like home(( These are great vivid details.)) . The bakery is everything I value about my neighborhood. It completely represents what kind of neighbor I want to be. Plus, it’s not a bad place for a post-run snack.

Through my runs, I’ve also made connections with those who frequent the sidewalks alongside me. One of the people I see regularly on my runs is Mrs. Carter, an elderly woman who always has a kind word and a smile for everyone she meets. Her white hair is carefully curled, and her face is dimpled with laugh lines from thousands of conversations like ours. She often stops to chat with me, asking how my day is going and sharing stories from her own life. I always look forward to seeing her. She’s like the grandmother I never had. Mrs. Carter inspires me to be a better community member every day(( This kind of reflection brings the focus back to the writer’s personal journey.)) .

Running through my neighborhood is about more than just staying fit. It’s also about being in community with those around me. As I weave through the people on the sidewalk, I feel as though I am weaving myself through their stories, picking up tidbits and adding them to my own narrative. I wouldn’t be who I am today without these runs that have taught me so much. I can’t wait to run across my college campus, admiring my new surroundings and meeting my new neighbors(( I like this gesture to the future—as an AO, I would start to picture this student running through my campus, too!)) .

AO Notes on Running through My Neighborhood

Running essays can get a bad rap in college admissions. But this one overcomes that stereotype. At its core, this essay is about the runner’s relationship to their community. I really appreciate how much care and enthusiasm this writer shows for those around them.

• Writing: The writer’s voice shines through. They have great vivid descriptions, and we’re really able to envision ourselves in the neighborhood alongside them.
• Personal meaning: The way the writer describes those they encounter in their neighborhood shows that this isn’t a minor part of their life. Their runs are a big deal. The people they see along the way have greatly shaped who they are.
• Greater focus on self: Now, there are much worse culprits when it comes to personal essays that focus on people other than the writer. But the writer does toe the line. Their descriptions mostly focus on those around them, and while there is some reflection that connects their own experience to other people, it doesn’t actually take up much space in the essay. To level up, the writer could make this essay more about themself.

Personal Statement Example #11: Musical Installation Art

As a child, I was always drawn to stringed instruments(( The hook could have more punch, but this gets the job done.)) . I would pluck at my dad's old guitars, create makeshift harps with dental floss, and even play around with the banjo and harp in music class. As I got older, I realized that I wanted to focus on making my own instruments. And where better to start than in my dad's scrapyard? The yard sprawled out for almost five acres behind our house. It was a marvel of junk and oddities, with the accumulated garbage from hundreds of junker cars built up in our backyard. I grew up playing there, leading a childhood that most parents would probably see as reckless—rolling tires through narrow alleyways between crushed cars stacked high. But for me, the backyard was an endless playground for my imagination.

It was there that I discovered the joys of welding and soldering. I would rummage through piles of metal and find pieces that I could fashion into something new. My first sculptures were simple, resembling birds or dogs and pieced together from strips of metal. I’d look for similar art everywhere I went, grasping for inspiration. At a fair one weekend, I saw a booth run by an artist who built guitars. After speaking with him about his art, he asked to see a picture of my sculptures. I showed him and explained that I hoped to make my own instruments one day, too. He scuttled to the back of his tent and returned with a gift: a set of thick copper strings. “Try using those,”(( What an endearing story.)) he told me.

My first sculpture instrument was a crude thing—little more than a board of metal with pegs that I used to pull the copper strings tight. But I tightened them, I was in love—spending all night plucking away. At first, the instrument wailed and screeched. String by string, I delicately tuned the wires into sirens. I had created something that played music, and I was so proud.

My experience building the instrument motivated me to enroll in a sculpture class at the local community college. It was there that I learned how to properly solder metal and create more complex structures. For my final project, I made a three-foot-tall, four-stringed metal instrument in the shape of a dragon.

But as I worked, I started to realize that my dragon wasn't going to be beautiful in the traditional sense. Its metal body was jagged and uneven, and the strings were stretched tight across its back in a way that produced discordant, almost abrasive music. I tried to adjust the tuning, but no matter what I did, the music remained harsh and unpleasant.

At first, I was disappointed. I wanted my dragon to be a work of art, something that people would marvel at and love listening to. But as I continued to play with it, I started to see the beauty in the chaos(( This paragraph shows wonderful growth. And as a reader, I’m drawn in trying to imagine what the sculpture actually looks like.)) . The music it produced was like a musical language that I had invented, one that was wild and untamed. It was a reflection of my own creativity and individuality. A discordant collection of notes that sounded like they’d been tuned so as to be atonal. But I didn't care. I was a scrapyard kid, and this dragon played the song of my people: strong, innovative, and beautiful.

The combination of sculpture and music fascinates me. How does the shape of a fabrication affect the kind of sound that the object produces? What sounds do different materials produce? As I’ve learned more about sculpture, I’ve also become interested in installation art that has sound dimensions. I want to capture people’s visual and aural attention to inspire questions about how we navigate the aesthetic world(( It sounds like this topic potentially relates to the student’s future goals. If that’s true, there could be a clearer academic connection here.)) . And I’ll use whatever scraps I can find to make my creations.

AO Notes on Musical Installation Art

I don’t think I’ve ever seen a piece of musical installation art myself, so this topic really held my attention. I appreciate the journey the writer went on to learn that their art may not look like everyone else’s, but it can be just as impactful.

• Topic: I like this topic not only because it’s not one you see every day but also because it lets the writer reveal a lot about themself and their background. We see where they grew up and who they grew up with, and we also learn about this deeply meaningful personal interest.
• Writing style: This author has a very distinct writing style. In some ways, the writing style mirrors their art style—abrupt at times, melodic at others.
• Organization: The first half of this essay doesn’t always match up with the second half. Even though we’re still able to see the writer’s journey as a metal artist and musician, there’s still a bit of streamlining that needs to happen.

Personal Statement Example #12: Ski Patrol

I can never get enough of being in the mountains(( This hook isn’t very compelling, so it could use some more attention.)) . I am a skier through and through. Growing up, I spent countless family vacations on the slopes with my dad and siblings. I love the rush I get speeding down the mountain—I’ve improved so much over my life that I can now handle most runs I come across. But last year, I took my love for skiing to a whole other level by joining ski patrol.

It was mid-December, and my family had decided to take a weekend away to go skiing. Everything was going normally at first. We had a good day on the slopes and wanted to go one more run before calling it a night. We took a moment to rest and watched the person in front of us go. Only seconds after she headed down the mountain, something happened with her ski. She catapulted into a nearby tree. People raced to check on her, while we stayed back and alerted ski patrol.

When ski patrol arrived, I watched in amazement. They moved in such a precise way. They were like a machine—everyone knew exactly what to do when. Thankfully, it was a false alarm and the skier only had a few scratches. But my own life was changed forever. I knew then that I wanted to be a part of this team, to help others in a tangible way and to make a difference on the mountain that had always been my home.

As soon as I could, I applied for the Junior Ski Patrol team. I had to go through a tryout process on the hill, which made me nervous. But it felt good to be surrounded by people who loved skiing as much as I do. Thankfully, I was accepted shortly after; it was one of the best days of my life. Now on Junior Ski Patrol, I have the opportunity to do what I love – skiing – while also making a positive impact on others(( And here we get to the heart of the essay. The writer wants to help others while doing something they love. It’s a noble pursuit!)) . My team shadows the adult Ski Patrol, and we learn a lot of lessons along the way.

On the mountain (and in life), you never know what challenges might arise. One of the most important things I’ve learned from Junior Ski Patrol is to be prepared for anything. I’ve gotten my CPR and first aid certifications so I’m always prepared to administer life-saving care to anyone who might need it. I know how to pack a bag full of enough essentials to survive harsh weather or injuries.

But ski patrol has also taught me so much more than just how to help others. It has shown me how I work best on a team. I’m not naturally a leader, which is something I’ve always felt ashamed about. After learning from our mentors who all fulfill different roles on their adult Ski Patrol team, I realized that I don’t have to be a leader to be a good team member. The quiet collaborators who can follow the lead, take initiative when needed, and do their jobs really well are just as important as the people who are front-and-center(( An important personal insight.)) .

Being on ski patrol as a high school student has been an incredible journey, and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a part of such a dedicated team. More importantly, I’m proud of the growth I’ve experienced. I went from a person who just loves skiing to a person who is more confident in herself. I no longer feel unprepared or timid. I know exactly how to keep myself safe and work alongside others. While I don’t want to be a professional Ski Patroller or even go into medicine, I know these lessons will serve me well wherever life takes me(( As an AO, I would have been wondering if being on JSP made them want to study medicine, so I appreciate that they answered it for me!)) . But no matter where I end up, when the mountain calls, you know I’ll answer.

AO Notes on Ski Patrol

In this fun hobby-meets-accomplishment essay, the writer shows us their strengths of care and teamwork. I like the crossover between something that they really enjoy and this impressive accomplishment they have of being on Junior Ski Patrol.

• Lessons learned: The writer makes it very clear what lessons they learned from Junior Ski Patrol. Lessons don’t always have to be this explicit, but I appreciate how the writer really takes the time to reflect on what they’ve learned.
• Personal insight: Okay, this point is related to the lessons learned. But it’s important to draw out on its own because personal essays are, of course, personal. This topic easily could have been just about skiing down a mountain or administering first aid on patrol. Instead, the writer kept the focus inward to meet the expectations of a personal essay.
• What’s at stake?: We do get a good sense of personal meaning. But the writer could do a better job of speaking to the significance of this activity to their life. A good question to ask is, “What’s at stake?” What would I have lost or gained if this story had turned out differently? Asking these questions can also help you figure out what it is that you want an admissions officer to learn from your personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #13: The Regulars

One pump of vanilla syrup. Frothed milk. One espresso shot. Caramel drizzle(( Starting with some version of the following sentence would have been a stronger hook.)) . Like a scientist at her bench, I have methodically repeated these steps four days a week for the past two years. During my time as a Starbucks barista, I’ve learned hundreds of recipes and customizations. I know all the secret menu hacks, and I’ve developed several recipes for friends and family too. I pride myself on speed, quality, and memory. My favorite part of the job is the customer service. As one of the busiest locations in the region, I’ve caffeinated thousands. But it’s my regular customers, those whose orders I know like the back of my hand, who have truly impacted me.

Venti Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew, hold the vanilla syrup. A busy mom of four, Chelsea is always in a hurry. I try to catch her the moment she enters the store so I can get started right away. Her Venti drink fuels her through school dropoffs and pickups, gymnastics lessons, and evening math homework. Throughout my conversations with her, I’ve learned that Chelsea is a scheduling virtuoso. As someone with ADHD(( This paragraph is almost too much about Chelsea, so this sentence is crucial to bring the focus back to the writer.)) , I became so inspired by her ability to juggle so many people and schedules simultaneously. After asking her for advice, she helped me find a time management system that I can keep up with. I have Chelsea to thank for my improved grades.

Grande dark roast, no room for cream. Mr. Williams is a retired businessman who always tips 100%. Mr. Williams is a quiet man, so it took me months to draw any information from him. Instead of using my over-the-top customer service voice, I eventually learned to be myself. When I got him to open up, I discovered that he was a service worker himself before he made it big in business in his sixties. The truth is, Mr. Williams has tipped me hundreds of dollars throughout my time here, which is extra money that will help me pay for college. He’s taught me the value of quiet generosity(( Let’s be honest. Mr. Williams sounds like a cool guy. But Mr. Williams isn’t applying to college—the writer is! I like that we get small glimpses into who the writer is through this paragraph, but there’s still room for more.)) .

Tall soy London Fog. Sweet Darla gave up coffee twenty-five years ago, but she still loves an occasional treat. When Darla enters, I clear my schedule. She always has stories to tell about the eighty years of life she’s lived. Darla is everything I want to be at that age: she’s spunky, opinionated, and hilarious(( Here we learn a lot about the writer through Darla.)) . Sometimes I tell Darla stories of my own. When I explained the dramatic series of events that led to me landing first chair in my symphony, she said she was going to retell it her bridge club. Making Darla laugh so hard will always be one of my proudest moments.

Grande iced matcha. Taylor is my age and goes to my school. When I took her order for the first time, I felt embarrassed that I needed to work to support myself while she could enjoy expensive drinks. But her kindness softened me. As time went on, I learned that she visited Starbucks so much because she wanted to get out of her house, which wasn’t a very happy place. While I have to take on as many shifts as possible, I still have a happy home to return to afterward. Now Taylor comes in near the end of my shift so we can take our drinks and have dinner at my house.

When you work in customer service, customers enter and exit your life like a revolving door. But the regulars, those special people who draw connections from daily but brief interactions, stick with you for life. I wouldn’t be who I am today if it weren’t for these people, and I would never have met them if it weren’t for my job as a barista. I haven’t just been making drinks these past two years. I’ve been making friends(( The conclusion does a good job tying all these different stories back together. )) .

AO Notes on The Regulars

No one appreciates a good barista story more than a tired admissions officer on their 30th application of the day! I like the personality that comes through in this essay especially. But this is one of those cases where it’s almost too much about other people.

• Creative take: Not every college essay needs a creative flair. In fact, sometimes going for “unique” structures can detract from an essay. But I like how the writer uses this format to structure the essay.
• Organization: This essay isn’t one a reader is bound to get lost in. The introduction sets up the essay well, it’s easy to see the connections between the points the writer is conveying, and the conclusion brings the focus back to the writer.
• More focus on self: While we do learn about the writer in this essay, we also learn a lot about Chelsea, Mr. Williams, Darla, and Taylor. The writer could have pared down the descriptions of other people—or cut one of the examples altogether—to save more room for personal reflection.

“Bad” Personal Statement Examples

These “bad” essays aren’t necessarily bad. They just aren’t very effective personal statements. Specifically, these two essays make some of the biggest college essay mistakes.

Making mistakes, especially when you’ve never written a personal statement before, is to be expected. We’ve included these examples so you can see what those mistakes look like in real-time. Learning from ineffective examples can be just as helpful as learning from the exceptional ones, so grab your pencil and start taking notes.

Our admissions officers have highlighted what’s working and what’s not. They offer helpful commentary and advice for revisions that you can use to assess your own personal statement.

Personal Statement Example #14: The Worst Year

My sophomore year of high school presented me with so many challenges(( This hook definitely gets straight to the point, but it doesn’t draw me in as a reader.)) . I struggled with a lot that year and barely managed to get by. It was the greatest challenge I ever faced.

The year started out like any other but soon went into chaos. My brother suddenly started struggling with drugs and alcohol. Before that, we didn’t know how bad he was hurting. But one night he finally came to us for help because apparently he had been using substances to cope with his emotions. He was scared because he felt like he had reached a breaking point and needed support. My parents didn’t want to help because they thought that he didn’t have a problem but I know my brother and I knew that he didn’t seem like himself. It was so sad to watch him go through that. I tried my best to help him but I was only a kid. I couldn’t really do anything besides tell him I loved him. Eventually my parents decided to get him some help, so he went away for a while and I wrote him letters every week and visited him as much as I could. The treatment he got helped thankfully. He’s doing better now and I am grateful that he is my brother.

But then Covid hit and I couldn’t even leave my house. We thought it would just be a two week vacation to school but it turned into two whole years of my life gone just like that. At the beginning I was stuck in my bedroom while my parents were working their jobs from the living room. Everyone was constantly getting annoyed with each other and driving each other wild. I would be doing a class Zoom in my room and I could hear my parents in a meeting in the living room. I had a hard time not being able to see my friends. I couldn't focus and my grades dropped. Even my teachers didn’t really seem to care. I was sick of staring at black Zoom screens all the time that I even stopped logging on. All of that combined led to me becoming very depressed and anxious. My grades dropped even more because I just couldn’t pay attention or focus enough to do my homework. I ended up getting grades way lower than I ever thought I would that year and I’m so frustrated about it because it felt like I was trying my best but it just wasn’t enough(( Here we see the writer opening up a bit and reflecting on what it was like to go through that experience.)) .

Even once we finally got back in school things didn’t get much better. The pandemic was just too much for my family so my parents ended up getting divorced at the beginning of my junior year. After all we had been through together seeing them separate made me devastated. My dad got an apartment and I had to go back and forth between their houses and pack up all my stuff every time. It was like moving my entire life every weekend. My brother was out of the house by this point so it was just me all by myself. My school was far from my dad’s new place so I’d have a long commute on the weeks I was with him. He was stressed at work and about the divorce and I just ended up feeling so lonely and spending most of my time in my room. My grades got better once online school stopped(( This moment of hope does a lot for moving the essay forward.)) but I had a hard time keeping close relationships with my friends because they didn’t like that I was living far away now and that we couldn’t really hang out anymore.

I couldn’t believe that two years would change so much. Getting through everything really challenged me. But I’m glad to be moving forward with my life.

AO Notes on The Worst Year

This student definitely had a challenging year. It’s clear that they’ve overcome a lot, and I appreciate their willingness to share their struggles. I like that the very last sentence

What this essay does well:

• Vulnerability: Writing about challenges is never easy, especially when you’re writing to people you don’t know. This writer is bold and unafraid in doing so.

What could be improved on:

• Not enough positivity: Here’s the thing. You definitely don’t need to be able to spin all of your challenging experiences into positive ones. But the topics you choose to write your college essay about should ultimately conclude on a positive note. You want your college essay to show you in a positive light, so you should choose a topic that lets you find a light, positive, or hopeful resolution.

Personal Statement Example #15: The Strikeout that Changed My Life

The stadium lights shone brightly in my eyes. I stepped up to the plate and drew back my bat. I wiggled my fingers, waiting. The pitcher wound up his arm and threw the ball towards me. My eyes worked overtime to track the ball. I watched as it flew directly towards the center of the plate and made a last-minute curve(( I like this vivid description.)) . It went straight into the catcher’s mitt. “Strike three!” the umpire yelled. That was the time I struck out at the quarter-finals. My team was so close to making it to the championship that we could taste it. It was the bottom of the sixth, and I gave up a valuable chance to score game-winning runs. We ended up losing. I learned a valuable lesson that fateful day. I never wanted to let my team down like that again(( And the writer jumps quickly into the main theme of the essay. Still, the message here could be more specific.)) .

We had advanced through our bracket without much trouble. The other teams were no match for our work ethic and teamwork. We were in perfect sync. As the first baseman, I was ready for any throw that came my way. We were also hitting well. I scored three home runs throughout the course of the tournament. We were a high-functioning machine. But for a machine to work, each cog has to function correctly. When I stepped up to the plate in the sixth inning, I was a broken cog.

After our quarter–final loss, I grieved with my teammates. Then I went off on my own to think. How had I let my team down so badly? How did I not even try to swing at that pitch? It was all my fault. I had to figure out what I had done wrong so I would never make the mistake again. I realized that I had been thinking selfishly. I was concerned about my own performance, my own at-bat averages(( This is a good reflection.)) . I was scared of failing because I didn’t want to be embarrassed. And worrying about all of those things caused me to lose focus and miss my chance to make a difference. Instead, I should have been thinking about how my at-bat would contribute to my team’s overall goal of winning the game.

I returned to where my teammates were congregating, and several of them patted me on the back. The next day, we went over how the game went as a team and talked about how we could improve at our tournament the following weekend. I admitted that I felt like I let the team down. My teammates said that they understood and reassured me that mistakes happen. It wasn’t my failed at-bat alone that lost us the game. Like winning, losing is a team effort. It was a culmination of lots of little issues. At the end of the day, the other team just out-performed us. But we could try hard, practice a lot, and return triumphant next weekend.

Letting my team down was a crushing blow to my self-esteem. I never want to feel like that again, but I know that the experience caused me to grow. Through all of this, I learned that I have to trust myself and my team(( Here we get to the lesson learned.)) . Focusing on myself alone can only get me so far. But focusing on my team can get me to where I want to go. I’m actually thankful that I struck out in that sixth inning because it caused me to learn an important life lesson.

AO Notes on The Strikeout that Changed My Life

This essay on its own definitely isn’t “bad.” As far as essays go, it’s clear, well-written, and organized nicely. But as a college essay, it could be doing more work on the writer’s behalf. See, as an admissions officer, I don’t actually learn that much about the writer from this essay alone. I see that they like baseball, are a good teammate, and can overcome failure. Those are wonderful traits, but they don’t exactly help set this student apart on the admissions committee floor. Instead, the student could make this essay more vulnerable and personal.

• Writing: The writer uses some great creative writing skills to really set the scene for the readers. In that first paragraph, I really feel like I’m there watching the game.
• Reflection: Even though the topic could be more significant, the writer does a great job reflecting on the meaning they drew from the experience.
• Significance: It’s very clear that this topic holds a lot of meaning to the writer. But as a college essay topic, it lacks vulnerability and stakes.

Key Takeaways

Writing a personal statement is a difficult ask, especially when you’ve never even read one before. But now, with these fifteen examples in your back pocket, you’re ready to write your own.

If you’re not sure what steps to take next, hop on over to our guide to writing personal statements for advice. You can also find more extensive guidance on the Essay Academy , a comprehensive college essay writing video course and community.

Happy writing! 🥳

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Como escrever uma declaração pessoal de sucesso para a pós-graduação

Estratégias para conquistar comitês de admissão.

• Ensaios de Admissão
• Escolhendo um programa de pós-graduação
• Dicas e conselhos
• Cartas de recomendação
• Admissões da Faculdade de Medicina
• Ajuda para lição de casa
• Escola particular
• Preparação para teste
• Admissões na faculdade
• Vida universitária
• Escola de Negócios
• Escola de Direito
• Ensino à distância

Uma declaração pessoal para a pós-graduação é uma oportunidade de mostrar o que você trará para o programa de pós-graduação e explicar como o programa se encaixa em seus objetivos maiores de carreira.

Alguns programas pedirão que você escreva uma única redação cobrindo tanto sua história pessoal quanto o que você deseja estudar na pós-graduação. Outros, no entanto, exigirão uma declaração pessoal e uma declaração de propósito . A declaração pessoal deve se concentrar em você e em seu histórico, enquanto a declaração de propósito deve se concentrar em sua pesquisa ou no que você planeja estudar na pós-graduação. Siga estas estratégias para criar uma declaração pessoal estelar que se destacará nos escritórios de admissão. 

Principais conclusões

• A declaração pessoal oferece uma oportunidade para você compartilhar informações sobre você e seus interesses acadêmicos para os comitês de admissão de pós-graduação.
• A declaração pessoal deve discutir sua formação acadêmica, bem como experiências relevantes de trabalho e pesquisa.
• Ao falar sobre sua experiência anterior, certifique-se de destacar as habilidades que você aprendeu e como suas experiências anteriores o levaram a se interessar pela pós-graduação.
• Seu primeiro rascunho de sua declaração pessoal não precisa ser perfeito. Dê a si mesmo tempo para revisar e revisar sua redação e certifique-se de buscar feedback de outras pessoas sobre seu rascunho.

Estruturação de uma declaração pessoal

Sua declaração pessoal deve incluir uma introdução e um resumo de sua experiência anterior (incluindo seu curso, experiência de pesquisa e experiência de trabalho relevante). Além disso, se você não estiver cobrindo esses tópicos em uma declaração de propósito separada, também deve discutir por que deseja fazer pós-graduação, o que deseja estudar como estudante de pós-graduação e por que esse programa de pós-graduação específico é ideal para você. .

Começando sua redação

As declarações pessoais podem começar de algumas maneiras diferentes. Alguns alunos começam sua redação discutindo seu histórico pessoal ou compartilhando uma anedota convincente que explica por que estão interessados ​​na pós-graduação. Outros alunos simplesmente começam sua redação falando claramente sobre suas experiências acadêmicas e interesse na pós-graduação. Não há uma resposta “tamanho único” aqui, então fique à vontade para escolher a introdução que funciona melhor para sua redação.

Às vezes, a introdução de uma declaração pessoal é a parte mais difícil de escrever. Se você estiver enfrentando um bloqueio criativo, lembre-se de que  não  precisa começar com a introdução. Quando terminar de escrever o resto da redação, você pode ter uma ideia muito melhor do tipo de introdução que sua redação precisa.

Resumindo sua experiência anterior

Em sua declaração pessoal, você vai querer falar sobre sua experiência acadêmica anterior e como ela o preparou para a pós-graduação. Você pode falar sobre cursos que gostou (especialmente qualquer curso avançado), projetos de pesquisa em que possa ter trabalhado ou estágios e experiências de trabalho relevantes para a pós-graduação.

Ao descrever sua experiência anterior, certifique-se de não apenas escrever sobre o que você fez, mas também o que aprendeu e como a experiência contribuiu para seu interesse na pós-graduação. Por exemplo, se você ganhou experiência em pesquisa auxiliando um estudante de pós-graduação em seu projeto de pesquisa, não descreva apenas sobre o que era o projeto. Em vez disso, seja o mais específico possível sobre as habilidades que você adquiriu (por exemplo, ganhar experiência usando técnicas de laboratório ou um banco de dados acadêmico específico). Além disso, escreva sobre como suas experiências passadas despertaram sua curiosidade e o ajudaram a decidir que a pós-graduação é a escolha certa para você.

Lembre-se de que você também pode falar sobre experiências não acadêmicas, como trabalho voluntário ou empregos de meio período. Ao mencionar essas experiências, destaque como elas mostram habilidades transferíveis (ou seja, habilidades que também serão valiosas em seu programa de pós-graduação, como habilidades de comunicação ou habilidades interpessoais). Por exemplo, se você supervisionou um grupo de alunos como conselheiro do acampamento, pode falar sobre como essa experiência o ajudou a desenvolver habilidades de liderança. Se você teve um emprego de meio período na faculdade, pode falar sobre os desafios que resolveu no trabalho e como eles demonstram sua capacidade de resolver problemas.

Se você enfrentou obstáculos significativos na faculdade, sua declaração pessoal também pode ser um lugar para discutir a experiência (se você se sentir à vontade para fazê-lo) e sua influência sobre você.

Escrevendo sobre por que você quer frequentar a pós-graduação

Em sua declaração pessoal, você também deve falar sobre seus objetivos futuros: o que você deseja estudar na pós-graduação e como isso se relaciona com seus objetivos maiores para sua futura carreira. A pós-graduação é um grande compromisso, então os professores vão querer ver que você pensou cuidadosamente em sua decisão e que a pós-graduação é realmente necessária para a carreira que você deseja seguir.

Ao falar sobre por que você quer fazer pós-graduação, é bom ser o mais específico possível sobre por que a escola para a qual você está se candidatando seria uma boa combinação para seus objetivos de carreira. Se você está se inscrevendo em um programa que envolve uma quantidade significativa de pesquisa (como programas de doutorado e alguns programas de mestrado), é importante falar sobre os tópicos de pesquisa em que você está mais interessado em estudar durante a pós-graduação. Para programas que envolvem pesquisa, também é uma boa ideia ler o site do departamento para aprender sobre os tópicos de pesquisa dos membros do corpo docente e, em seguida, personalizar sua declaração pessoal de acordo com cada escola. Em sua declaração pessoal, você pode mencionar vários professores com quem gostaria de trabalhar e explicar como a pesquisa deles combina com o que você gostaria de estudar.

Erros a evitar

• Não revisando. Na pós-graduação, a escrita será um grande componente de sua carreira acadêmica, especialmente se o seu programa envolver a redação de uma tese de mestrado ou tese de doutorado. Reservar um tempo para revisar mostra aos professores que eles podem confiar em sua capacidade de escrita. 
• Compartilhamento de informações excessivamente pessoais. Embora compartilhar uma história pessoal possa ajudar a ilustrar seu interesse na pós-graduação, divulgar informações muito pessoais pode sair pela culatra. Em uma pesquisa com presidentes de comitês de admissão de pós-graduação em psicologia, alguns professores apontaram que compartilhar informações excessivamente pessoais pode fazer com que os candidatos pareçam pouco profissionais. E, como aponta o Escritório de Serviços de Carreira de Harvard , os entrevistadores podem fazer perguntas de acompanhamento sobre sua declaração pessoal em entrevistas. Portanto, se não for algo que você se sentiria à vontade para compartilhar em um ambiente cara a cara, é melhor deixar de fora de sua declaração pessoal.
• Escrevendo demais. Mantenha seu ensaio breve: se o prompt do ensaio não fornecer um limite específico de palavras/páginas, geralmente 1-2 páginas é um bom tamanho. (No entanto, se o programa ao qual você está se candidatando especificar um comprimento diferente, certifique-se de seguir as instruções.)
• Linguagem vaga.  Seja o mais específico possível sobre por que você deseja fazer pós-graduação e quais tópicos deseja estudar. Como explica o Career Center da UC Berkeley , você deve evitar usar palavras como “interessante” ou “agradável”, a menos que você as elabore mais. Por exemplo, não diga apenas que você acha um tópico interessante – compartilhe uma pesquisa convincente sobre a qual você aprendeu ou explique por que você gostaria de contribuir para o conhecimento nessa área como estudante de pós-graduação.
• Não pedindo ajuda. Você não precisa escrever um ensaio perfeito no primeiro rascunho. Procure mentores confiáveis, como professores e alunos de pós-graduação, e peça feedback sobre o rascunho do seu ensaio. Você também pode procurar centros de recursos no campus em sua faculdade para obter feedback e suporte adicionais sobre declarações pessoais.

Como é uma declaração pessoal de sucesso

Alguns dos ensaios de admissão mais atraentes são aqueles em que os alunos são capazes de estabelecer uma conexão clara entre suas experiências passadas (cursos, empregos ou experiências de vida) e sua motivação para frequentar a pós-graduação. Se você puder mostrar aos leitores que é bem qualificado e apaixonado pelo curso proposto, é muito mais provável que você chame a atenção dos comitês de admissão.

Se você está procurando inspiração, leia  exemplos de ensaios de admissão de pós-graduação . Em um  ensaio de amostra , a escritora fala sobre a mudança em seus interesses acadêmicos – enquanto inicialmente estudava química, agora planeja ir para a faculdade de direito. Este ensaio é bem sucedido porque a escritora explica claramente por que ela está interessada em mudar de campo e demonstra sua paixão por estudar direito. Além disso, a escritora destaca habilidades transferíveis que serão relevantes para a profissão jurídica (como explicar como trabalhar como assistente residente em seu dormitório universitário a ajudou a desenvolver habilidades interpessoais e ganhar experiência na resolução de conflitos). Isso fornece uma lição importante para escrever uma declaração pessoal: você pode falar sobre experiências passadas que não estão diretamente relacionadas aos acadêmicos, desde que explique como essa experiência ajudou a prepará-lo para a pós-graduação.

Escrever uma declaração pessoal para a pós-graduação pode parecer uma tarefa assustadora, mas não precisa ser. Ao demonstrar suas qualificações e entusiasmo e buscar feedback sobre rascunhos de professores e outros recursos no campus, você pode escrever uma forte declaração pessoal que mostre quem você é e por que você é um bom candidato para a pós-graduação.

Fontes e Leituras Adicionais

• “4 Amostras de Ensaios de Pós-Graduação.” Ilhas do Canal da CSU: Desenvolvimento de Carreira e Liderança . https://www.csuci.edu/careerdevelopment/services/sample-graduate-school-admissions-essays.pdf
• Appleby, Drew C. e Karen M. Appleby. “Beijos da Morte no Processo de Candidatura à Pós-Graduação”. Ensino de Psicologia 33.1 (2006): 19-24 https://www.researchgate.net/publication/246609798_Kisses_of_Death_in_the_Graduate_School_Application_Process
• “Aplicando-se à pós-graduação”. Série de Recursos de Graduação, Universidade de Harvard: Escritório de Serviços de Carreira (2017). https://ocs.fas.harvard.edu/files/ocs/files/applying_to_grad_school_0.pdf
• Brown, Joseph L. “'Diga a eles quem você é e por que você se inscreveu': declarações pessoais.” Universidade de Stanford: Escritório de Assuntos Multiculturais. https://oma.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/Personal_Statements.v6_0.pdf
• “Escola de Pós-Graduação – Declaração”. UC Berkeley: Centro de Carreira . https://career.berkeley.edu/Grad/GradStatement
• "Afirmação pessoal." Universidade de Harvard: Escritório de Serviços de Carreira. https://ocs.fas.harvard.edu/personal-statement
• “O que é uma boa declaração de propósito?” Universidade de Stanford: Escola de Pós-Graduação em Educação. https://ed.stanford.edu/sites/default/files/Statement-of-Purpose.pdf
• “Escrevendo a Declaração Pessoal.” UC Berkeley: Divisão de Pós-Graduação . http://grad.berkeley.edu/admissions/apply/personal-statement/
• “Escrevendo seu ensaio de inscrição para a pós-graduação.” Universidade Carnegie Mellon: Centro de Comunicação Global . https://www.cmu.edu/gcc/handouts-and-resources/grad-app-sop

Planea tu Posgrado

Aplica a un posgrado, mentores, profesores y empleadores, ¿qué es el personal statement, tu carta de motivos.

El personal statement (PS) no es tu currículum en forma de ensayo. A diferencia del currículum, el PS es más detallado, porque construye una imagen de quién eres tú como persona; tu contexto familiar, cultural y académico, y las experiencias que te han formado a lo largo de tu vida. 

Es un ensayo en el que hablas de tus valores e intereses, tu trayectoria, tus planes a futuro y cómo todo esto se alinea con el programa de posgrado al que quieres aplicar.

¿Cómo escribir tu Personal Statement?

La narrativa: tú como guionista de tu historia.

Puedes empezar reflexionando sobre las siguientes preguntas:

¿Cuáles fueron los eventos clave en tu vida que te llevaron a donde estás ahora? Piensa en algunas personas, experiencias académicas o laborales, o situaciones personales que te hayan hecho cambiar de rumbo o fortalecer tus convicciones. ¿Qué te dicen estos eventos sobre ti, tus principios y tus valores? Recuerda que estás creando una imagen de tu persona, por lo que comunicar tus principios y valores fortalecerá el ensayo. Generalmente, los momentos que tienen un gran impacto en nuestra vida fortalecen nuestros paradigmas y principios o les hacen dar giros inesperados. ¡Habla de eso! ‍ ¿Cuáles son tus fortalezas y habilidades?  ¿Cómo has resuelto tus más grandes desafíos? ¿Qué lecciones te han dejado?  ¿Cómo has alcanzado tus mayores logros?  ¿Quién te ha ayudado o inspirado? ¿Qué has aprendido de esa persona? ‍

Ahora, elige un hilo conductor. Se trata de un tema, una actividad, una idea o un sueño muy importante que se haya mantenido constante a lo largo de tu trayectoria y que, seguramente, seguirá orientando tus decisiones hacia el futuro. Trata de entender la relación entre este hilo y el resto de la reflexión, tratando de articular una narrativa congruente. Te ponemos un ejemplo muy somero de lo que significa tener una narrativa creada alrededor de un hilo conductor:

“Cuando yo era niña, fui víctima de abuso sexual a manos de mi abuelo, lo cual me generó una constante inquietud por los temas de género y justicia. Me convertí en abogada y me adentré en temas de derechos sexuales. Trabajé en la Suprema Corte y busqué involucrarme en asuntos relacionados con esos temas. Ahí, aprendí que la letra de la ley dista mucho de la realidad de muchas mujeres, entre otras cosas, porque las autoridades tienden a pensar que hay una experiencia única de ser mujer. Esta parcialidad excluye y desprotege a todas aquellas mujeres que no caen dentro de las definiciones más convencionales. Quiero estudiar una  maestría en derecho para intentar incluir estas voces silenciadas. Como víctima de abuso, entiendo el significado del silencio y la invisibilidad y mi compromiso de largo plazo es que todas las mujeres vindiquen sus voces y exijan justicia.”

Si te das cuenta, en el ejemplo de arriba, la solicitante no definió el género y la justicia. No usó clichés ni formulismos; habló de ella, de su abuelo, de la Corte, de mujeres que son ignoradas, etc. 

¿Lograste hallar el hilo? El género y la justicia son los ejes de la narrativa. Fíjate cómo aparecen de principio a fin. Toda la trayectoria de esta persona ha sido una búsqueda por indagar en estos temas y desarrollarlos. En tu historia, piensa cuáles podrían ser esos ejes.

Ya que tengas una idea de cómo narrar tu historia, comienza a escribir. Al principio, sólo deja fluir tu imaginación. Produce imágenes con tus palabras, deja que el lector “vea” tu historia como si fuera una película. Es decir, en vez de hablar en abstracto o de manera genérica, describe hechos de la realidad. Describe y nombra situaciones, lugares o personas.

Gramática y la forma

Escribe en voz activa.

Habla en primera persona y evita pronombres impersonales. Por ejemplo, en lugar de “con esta investigación se logró” es preferible escribir “con esta investigación, logré, junto con un grupo de colaboradores…”. Puede parecer arrogante, pero recuerda que estás hablando de ti.

Puedes emplear sinónimos para no ser repetitivo, pero no trates de impresionar con lenguaje excesivamente florido o erudito. 

No le digas al lector que eres compasivo, motivado, inteligente, curioso, dedicado o único. Tienes que mostrarlo con ejemplos o anécdotas, no afirmarlo.

Recomendamos tener introducción, cuerpo y conclusión, dando un objetivo específico a cada sección.

La introducción es crucial para intrigar al lector y que este quiera seguir leyendo. Normalmente, es aquí donde anuncias el hilo conductor. Puedes hacerlo de muchas maneras, dependiendo el grado de sofisticación. Puede ser con una estadística relevante (ej. “una de cada tres mujeres es violentada por su pareja…”); una cita (ej. “We are determined to answer evil with good, slavery with freedom, rape with hope!” Widad Akrawi), o una anécdota personal o pregunta que te estés haciendo (ej. “Cuando yo era niña, fui víctima de abuso sexual a manos de mi abuelo”).  Cualquiera que sea tu introducción, debe ser relevante para la historia que quieres contar. La introducción tiene que estar ligada con las ideas del cuerpo y la conclusión del ensayo. Por más buena que sea una introducción, esta no tiene sentido si al final del ensayo el lector no entiende de qué manera está relacionada con el resto de la narrativa.

El cuerpo trasmite que tú eres la persona ideal para ingresar a la universidad y al programa de estudios. En estos párrafos vas a ir narrando tu trayectoria, pero no como si fuera tu currículum. Concéntrate en eventos que muestren tus cualidades, momentos que te dieron lecciones, personas que marcaron tu camino y los demás puntos sobre los que hiciste tu reflexión antes de empezar a escribir. Si es mucho lo que quieres decir, pregúntate qué te arrepentirías de no mencionar o qué de todo es realmente necesario e imprescindible para darle sentido a tu pequeño cuento, y descarta lo demás.  También, dedica un párrafo para decir qué harías tú si fueras admitido en el programa de tu interés: qué clases tomarías, cómo te ves participando en las clases o con los profesores, qué oportunidades de investigación o práctica profesional tomarías, etc.

La conclusión afirma qué sigue en tu vida: qué será de ti al terminar el programa de estudios y por qué este programa es el siguiente paso para llegar ahí. En la conclusión, explica cómo el posgrado te permitirá alcanzar tus metas de largo plazo y el impacto que esto tendrá en tu comunidad.

La edición: trabaja sobre el borrador

Lo que escribas inicialmente será muy diferente a tu ensayo final, así que no te preocupes porque sea perfecto al inicio.   ‍ En general, quienes hemos sido admitidos a posgrados en el extranjero encontramos útil compartir el ensayo con egresados de nuestro programa de interés. Puedes tener uno o más revisores de la sustancia del ensayo y otro(s) que revise(n) el idioma.  Comienza pronto para que tengas suficiente tiempo (preferentemente, semanas o meses) para hacer las revisiones necesarias. Además, esto le va a dejar tiempo a tus lectores para hacer una revisión a conciencia. ¡Es en tu beneficio!

Pulir el borrador final

Date tiempos lejos de tu ensayo. Después, vuelve a él con ojos frescos y pon especial atención en lo siguiente: 

Asegúrate de responder la(s) pregunta(s) o acatar las instrucciones que te pidieron en la universidad. 

Asegúrate de que cuentas con el número de palabras requerido y estás utilizando la fuente y el tamaño de letra adecuados. 

Acorta enunciados y elimina información que no sea esencial. Revisa si hay repeticiones o adjetivos que no aportan mucho y deshazte de ellos.

Revisa que tu ensayo fluya. Imagina que el lector va por un río en una canoa y está viendo tu historia conforme va navegando en el río. ¿En dónde se atora el flujo de la lectura? Si pasas de una oración a otra y no queda claro cómo llegaste ahí, estás en presencia de un gap . Llena ese gap con historia y/o utiliza buenos conectores lógicos entre ideas y entre párrafos (para algunas recomendaciones, da click aquí ). 

Corrige los errores gramaticales y ortográficos.

¿Es lo mismo un PS que un statement of purpose , un  leadership essay o los ensayos temáticos?

No.  ‍ El statement of purpose es prospectivo y el PS es retrospectivo. El primero dice más qué quieres hacer y el segundo enfatiza quién eres. Ambos hablan de tu experiencia y conocimiento, pero el statement of purpose enfatiza qué quieres estudiar y qué pretendes lograr con el título que recibas, mientras que el PS le dice al lector quién eres tú, tus motivaciones, tus logros y tus lecciones aprendidas. ‍ En cuanto al leadership essay , este se concentra en eventos específicos en los que hayas actuado como un líder o en los principios que definen tu enfoque del liderazgo. El PS muestra más que tus habilidades de liderazgo. ‍ Por último, un ensayo temático normalmente responde a una pregunta muy específica. La materia de esa pregunta es lo que va en el centro del ensayo. La descripción de tu persona o tus objetivos es secundario y está en función de lo que se te pregunta.

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