12 year old homework

Battles Over Homework: Advice For Parents

Guidelines for helping children develop self-discipline with their homework..

Posted September 5, 2012 | Reviewed by Lybi Ma

I would like to offer some advice about one of the most frequent problems presented to me in over 30 years of clinical practice: battles over homework. I have half-jokingly told many parents that if the schools of New York State no longer required homework, our children’s education would suffer (slightly). But, as a child psychologist, I would be out of business.

Many parents accept this conflict with their children as an unavoidable consequence of responsible parenting . These battles, however, rarely result in improved learning or performance in school. More often than not, battles over homework lead to vicious cycles of nagging by parents and avoidance or refusal by children, with no improvement in a child’s school performance. And certainly no progress toward what should be our ultimate goals : helping children enjoy learning and develop age-appropriate discipline and independence with respect to their schoolwork.

Before I present a plan for reducing battles over homework, it is important to begin with this essential reminder:

The solution to the problem of homework always begins with an accurate diagnosis and a recognition of the demands placed on your child. Parents should never assume that a child who resists doing homework is “lazy.”

Every child whose parents or teachers report ongoing resistance to completing schoolwork or homework; every child whose performance in school is below expectations based on his parents’ or teachers’ intuitive assessment of his intellectual potential; and every child who, over an extended period of time, complains that he “hates school” or “hates reading,” should be evaluated for the presence of an attention or learning disorder.

These children are not lazy. Your child may be anxious, frustrated, discouraged, distracted, or angry—but this is not laziness. I frequently explain to parents that, as a psychologist, the word lazy is not in my dictionary. Lazy, at best, is a description, not an explanation.

For children with learning difficulties, doing their homework is like running with a sprained ankle: It is possible, although painful, and he will look for ways to avoid or postpone this painful and discouraging task.

A Homework Plan

Homework, like any constructive activity, involves moments of frustration, discouragement, and anxiety . If you begin with some appreciation of your child’s frustration and discouragement, you will be better able to put in place a structure that helps him learn to work through his frustration—to develop increments of frustration tolerance and self-discipline.

I offer families who struggle with this problem a Homework Plan:

• Set aside a specified, and limited, time for homework. Establish, early in the evening, a homework hour.
• For most children, immediately after school is not the best time for homework. This is a time for sports, for music and drama, and free play.
• During the homework hour, all electronics are turned off—for the entire family.
• Work is done in a communal place, at the kitchen or dining room table. Contrary to older conventional wisdom , most elementary school children are able to work more much effectively in a common area, with an adult and even other children present, than in the “quiet” of their rooms.
• Parents may do their own ”homework” during this time, but they are present and continually available to help, to offer encouragement, and to answer children’s questions. Your goal is to create, to the extent possible, a library atmosphere in your home, again, for a specified and limited period of time. Ideally, therefore, parents should not make or receive telephone calls during this hour. And when homework is done, there is time for play.
• Begin with a reasonable, a doable, amount of time set aside for homework. If your child is unable to work for 20 minutes, begin with 10 minutes. Then try 15 minutes in the next week. Acknowledge every increment of effort, however small.
• Be positive and give frequent encouragement. Make note of every improvement, not every mistake.
• Be generous with your praise. Praise their effort, not their innate ability. But do not be afraid of praise.
• Anticipate setbacks. After a difficult day, reset for the following day.
• Give them time. A child’s difficulty completing homework begins as a problem of frustration and discouragement, but it is then complicated by defiant attitudes and feelings of unfairness. A homework plan will begin to reduce these defiant attitudes, but this will not happen overnight.

Most families have found these suggestions helpful, especially for elementary school children. Establishing a homework hour allows parents to move away from a language of threats (“If you don’t__ you won’t be able to__”) to a language of opportunities (“When” or “As soon as” you have finished__ we’ll have a chance to__”).

Of course, for many hurried families, there are complications and potential glitches in implementing any homework plan. It is often difficult, with children’s many activities, to find a consistent time for homework. Some flexibility, some amendments to the plan, may be required. But we should not use the complications of scheduling or other competing demands as an excuse, a reason not to establish the structure of a reasonable homework routine.

Copyright Ken Barish, Ph.D.

See Pride and Joy: A Guide to Understanding Your Child’s Emotions and Solving Family Problems .

Kenneth Barish, Ph.D. , is a clinical associate professor of Psychology at Weill Medical College, Cornell University.

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Home » Tools for Your 12-Year-Old » Homework for Your 12-Year-Old

Homework for Your 12-Year-Old

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Now Is the Right Time!

As a parent or someone in a parenting role, you play an essential role in your 12-year-old child’s/teen’s success. There are intentional ways to grow a healthy parent-child relationship, and setting up a daily homework routine provides a perfect opportunity.

Children/Teens age 12 are in the process of adapting early school age learning habits to their more demanding workload. They are establishing critical learning habits, including how they approach homework assignments, that will extend throughout their school years. For most children/teens, homework is a nightly reality. And, research shows a parent or someone in a parenting role plays a key role. Children/Teens who have a parent or someone in a parenting role involved in supporting learning at home and engaged in their school community have more consistent attendance, better social skills, and higher grade point averages and test scores than those children/teens without such involvement. 1 Indeed, the best predictor of students’ academic achievement is parental involvement.

Yet, there are challenges. You may discover outdated and uncompleted assignments crumpled in your child’s/teen’s backpack. Your child/teen may procrastinate on a long-term project until it becomes a crisis the night before it’s due. Questioning their work may result in power struggles when they have other goals in mind.

While getting a regular homework routine going might be a challenge, it can be a positive experience and promote valuable skills for school and life success. The steps below include specific, practical strategies along with effective conversation starters to support a homework routine in cooperative ways without a daily struggle.

Why Homework?

Children/Teens ages 11-14 will require managing a larger and more complex workload and need new study skills. This will take a whole new level of planning and organization. Their homework assignments can become your daily challenges if you don’t create regular routines with input from your children/teens in advance, clarify roles and responsibilities, and establish a plan for success.

Today, in the short term, homework routines can create

• greater cooperation and motivation;
• greater opportunities for connection and enjoyment as you each implement your respective roles and feel set up for success;
• trust in each other that you have the competence to complete your responsibilities with practice and care;
• less frustration due to better organization, space, and resources; and
• opportunities to learn about your child’s/teen’s school curriculum.

Tomorrow, in the long term, your child/teen

• builds skills in collaboration and cooperative goal setting;
• builds skills in responsible decision making, hard work, and persistence;
• gains independence, life skills competence, and self-sufficiency; and
• develops positive learning habits that contribute directly to school success.

Five Steps for Creating a Homework Routine

This five-step process helps your family establish a routine for homework. It also builds important skills in your child/teen. The same process can be used to address other parenting issues as well ( learn more about the process ).

These steps are done best when you and your child/teen are not tired or in a rush.

Intentional communication and a healthy parenting relationship support these steps.

Step 1. Get Your Child/Teen Thinking by Getting Their Input

You can get your child/teen thinking about establishing a homework routine by asking them open-ended questions. You’ll help prompt their thinking. You’ll also begin to better understand their thoughts, feelings, and challenges related to homework so that you can address them. In gaining input, your child/teen

• has the opportunity to think through the routine and problem solve any challenges they may encounter ahead of time;
• has a greater stake in anything they’ve designed themselves (and with that sense of ownership, comes a greater responsibility for implementing the routine);
• will have more motivation to work together and cooperate because of their sense of ownership; and
• will be working with you on making informed decisions (understanding the reasons behind those decisions) about a critical aspect of their learning — their homework.
• “When is the best time for you to do homework?”
• “What are things (like having a snack, taking breaks) that help you get your homework done?”
• Prepare for difficulties. Ask “I know you’ve missed completing assignments in the past. What helps you stay on top of homework and what gets in your way?”
• Experiment to figure out your plan. Since your child/teen has changed since their younger years along with the demands of their homework, it’s an ideal time to revisit the question of when your child/teen feels they’ll be at their best to tackle homework in the hours after school. They could have greater complexities than ever before with extracurriculars encroaching on free time, so there may not be a whole lot of opportunity for choice in the timing. But, if there is, try out different times to see what works best with their energy. Everyone has different energy cycles and times when they feel better able to focus, so work on discovering that rhythm with your child/teen, and you’ll go a long way toward setting them up for success!
• Take note of the time when your child/teen has said is their best time to do homework. Set a timer to go off at that time. Instead of you calling, “Time for homework!” which may incite a battle, an inanimate, dispassionate object is alerting them. You can use a kitchen timer outside or inside or collaboratively set an alarm on their cell phone or iPad.
• If your child/teen has decided to do homework right after school, be certain to provide a healthy high protein snack first (peanut butter crackers, cheese sticks, and apples). The social stress and expectations of school may be draining and could wear on a child’s/teen’s motivation to continue to work hard through the evening. Be sure they have the fuel necessary (through proper nutrition and a good night’s rest) to get through their work.
• If you cannot offer a choice in the time of day homework is completed, then find another choice your child/teen can make. For example, you could allow them to decide what space they use or what snack they will have to accompany homework completion. Adding some level of choice to the process will prevent power struggles and help your child/teen take ownership.
• a well-lit location (or get a task lamp to light up a preferred spot);
• close proximity to your family’s living space or kitchen (wherever you’ll typically be so that you are never far to offer support);
• a hard work surface that can get dirty (they may need to make a mess; pick a durable surface).
• School supplies including loose leaf paper, pens, pencils, pencil sharpeners, a dictionary, and any other items you anticipate they might need.
• No clutter. In fact, a disorganized environment can distract from their focus. So eliminate clutter, organize tools, and only have the essentials at hand. Invest in a few supply holders to keep tools neat and ready.
• A binder or bin or other receptacle designated for school papers that are brought home and stay at home.
• The goal of a homework space is to provide a well-equipped, consistent place for your child/teen to fully focus on the work at hand. In this way, they’ll know what they can expect. You won’t have to struggle over frustrations when they can’t find a school tool. And, they’ll learn to take greater responsibility for their learning as they work with you to organize this space.
• Make it fun! Designing a homework spot together can be an enjoyable experience. Allow your child/teen to pick out their own organization bins and school tools. Perhaps they could make a sign with their name on it to designate the space. Or, create a poster with an inspirational saying like, “Good things come from hard work!” Take a little time to label your new supply holders not only with names but also with stickers or drawings to allow your child/teen to personalize them. All this can be motivating.
• When offering choices in designing a homework space that works best for your child/teen, they may prefer to set up their work space in their bedroom because of their developmental desire for greater independence and privacy. If they do this, be sure you make a point of stopping in a few times – not to check up on them or play “Gotcha!” — but to offer your support. Also, be sure you establish clear boundaries and distinctions between screen time for homework and entertainment/socializing screen time.
• Create a family homework rule. Be sure to discuss (at a family dinner, for example) how the family can respect homework time. Consider if you want all siblings to do homework at the same time or not. If you want everyone to do homework at the same time, consider what would need to be in place to make that happen. Either way, agree upon a homework rule that each will respect the person who is focused on their work and will be quiet in that area of the house.

Step 2. Teach New Skills by Interactive Modeling

As a parent or someone in a parenting role, it’s easy to forget that your child/teen is learning brand new study skills including project management, organization, and planning. Though they may be assigned work they are capable of doing, they may not be prepared to manage the larger workload. Because so much is new, expectations are greater, and they feel like they should already know it all, they can become overwhelmed and frustrated. Learning about what developmental milestones your child/teen is working on can help you know which tasks might be more difficult. Here are some examples as they relate to homework. 2

• Eleven-year-olds have lots of physical energy to expend, so they may need some time after school to move. They tend to desire staying up late, which can intrude on school goals, so set clear limits on screen times before bed and establish bedtimes based on reasonable sleep requirements. Eleven-year-olds require 9 to 11 hours of sleep depending upon the individual. 3
• Twelve-year-olds are undergoing a significant growth spurt so they’ll also require nutritious food and their required night’s sleep. They thrive with leadership opportunities, so when you see those chances or can reframe assignments in terms of leadership, that’s ideal. Twelve-year-olds are gaining more sophisticated ideas about themselves, others, and the world, and will be eager to share those ideas with parents, so your listening ear is important.
• Thirteen-year-olds can become particularly sensitive to real or perceived criticism from you or from classmates. They can become moody. They are seeking their independence and are ready for more freedom. Look for ways to offer independence and freedom paired with the new responsibilities that accompany those chances.
• Fourteen-year-olds may feel and act like they “know it all,” but they still look to you to set clear boundaries and to offer guidance. They may distance themselves requiring greater independence. Your job as parents is to realize this and not take it personally. Be there to listen with an open mind when they are ready to talk. They may be highly resistant to what they might view as lectures from adults. They may be more willing to admit when they have made a mistake, however, which can be a great asset at homework time. They are eager to investigate the larger world, so assignments can be highly engaging if related to that interest.

Teaching is different than just telling. Teaching builds basic skills, grows problem-solving abilities, and sets your child/teen up for success. Teaching also involves modeling and practicing the positive behaviors you want to see, promoting skills, and preventing problems.

As a parent or someone in a parenting role, it is easy to be confused about how best to support your child’s/teen’s homework. Here are some specific ways you can define your role while ensuring your child/teen has full ownership over their learning process.

• “What is your guess about the answer?”
• “Is there another place you could find the answer?”
• “Is there another way to think about your answer?”
• Share your curiosity and interest in the subject but do not provide an answer.
• Focus on keywords so that they too can learn to spot key words.
• Attempt to read and review together. Because text is denser and more complex, children/teens may feel overwhelmed with information and struggle to focus on the most important points.
• Ask your child/teen which points are most important when you are talking about a problem.
• Have them underline or highlight those words in the instructions or in the specific question they are trying to answer so that you have a focusing point.
• Research together. If you cannot find the source of the problem in your child’s/teen’s books, then do some online research together. But, be certain that you allow your child/teen to drive the process. You might ask, “What should we look up or search for together?” These are the first seeds of strong research skills.
• Teach the essential “brain break.” Breaks do not represent weakness or a lack of persistence. In fact, human brains work better if they are given frequent breaks. Their young minds need processing time particularly as they are faced with taking in so much new information. In addition, the pressure of academic expectations can build. Their feelings may spill over at homework time when they are safe at home with you (and not needing to keep it together as much as at school).
• You might ask, “What else makes you feel better and comforted when you are frustrated?” Brainstorm a brief list of spaces, places, things, and actions that offer comfort when frustrated. Leave that list in your school tool homework space. It will serve as an ongoing resource when brain breaks are required.
• It’s a common challenge of homework time – particularly for middle school age students – to want to avoid failure and to fear making mistakes. In reality, because homework is practice, it is intended as a time to try out an answer, get it wrong, and try again. Hang up a sign near your homework spot to remind your child/teen, “Mistakes are part of learning.”
• You do not need to be subject matter experts EVER! If you find that you are struggling to get the right answer for yourself, take a step back. Realize that you are stealing a learning opportunity away from your child/teen. Ask yourself how you can provide the guidance and support for them to answer the question or solve the problem themselves (even if they get it wrong).

Though you may make comments you feel are empathizing with your child’s/teen’s predicament, be careful! Criticizing the work assigned, the teacher who assigned it, or the school’s policies will become demotivating for your child/teen. After all, why should they work hard if you don’t agree with what’s been assigned?

Step 3. Practice to Grow Skills and Develop Habits

Homework practice can take the form of cooperatively completing the task together or trying out a task with you as a coach and ready support. Practice grows vital new brain connections that strengthen (and eventually form habits) each time your child/teen practices.

• Use “I’d love to challenge you…” statements. When a child/teen learns a new ability, they are eager to show it off! Give them that chance. Say, “I’d love to pose a challenge to see if you can focus on math homework for the next seven minutes. Let’s set a timer.” This can be used when you are in the after school routine and need that alert to move on to homework.
• Do a “brain break” dry run. In the midst of homework one night, maybe at a natural breaking point, practice a “brain break.” Practice moving away from homework. Get a drink of water. Walk outside and sniff the fresh air. Then, go back and ask, “Do you feel refreshed and ready or do you need a little more time?” If they say they need more time, then ask what would make them feel better? Perhaps getting a snack or taking a walk might do the trick? This practice is super important if you plan to use it as a tool when your child/teen is really upset.
• Recognize effort. Frequently, children/teens get feedback on what they are not doing right, but how often do you recognize when they are working on getting better? Recognize effort by saying “I notice…” statements like, “I notice how you got to work this afternoon when the timer sounded without me asking – that’s taking responsibility!”
• Proactively remind. Often the challenges in a homework routine seem to recur day after day and may be predictable. You might know exactly what they are and when they are going to happen. So just before they do, remind in a gentle, non-public way. You may whisper in your child’s/teen’s ear, “Remember what we can do next to figure out the problem? What is it?”

Resist the temptation to nag. Children/Teens may require more time to work on an assignment than you feel is necessary. But, they need the time they need. Be sure to wait long enough for them to show you they are competent. Your waiting could make all the difference in whether they are able to do what you need them to do.

Step 4. Support Your Child’s/Teen’s Development and Success

At this point, you’ve taught your child/teen several new positive learning habits so that they understand how to perform them. You’ve practiced together. Now, you can offer support when it’s needed. Parents naturally offer support as they see their child/teen fumble with a situation in which they need help. This is no different.

• Promote a learning attitude. Show confidence that your child/teen can learn anything with time and practice (because they truly can!). Your comments and reflections will matter greatly in how competent they feel to meet any learning challenge.
• Ask key questions when your child/teen struggles. You could say, “It looks like you feel stuck. Is there another way you could approach the problem? How are you feeling about homework tonight?”
• Coach on communications. You might notice your child/teen struggling and getting stuck even with your support. You might then say, “Seems like you are having trouble figuring this problem out and cannot find the answer in your resources. Are there resources we haven’t thought about? This would be a good time to ask your teacher about this problem. How might you ask for help?”
• Stay engaged. It can be motivating for a child/teen when a parent does their own paperwork alongside them keeping them company. Working together, after all, is much more enjoyable than working alone.
• Allow for and reflect on real world consequences. If you see a mistake on your child’s/teen’s worksheet, don’t correct it. You’ll be taking away a valuable learning opportunity. You could leave it alone altogether or ask once, “Do you feel like this is right or are you struggling with it?” If your child/teen confirms it’s the answer they want to give, then allow them the experience of their teacher correcting it. It’s an important learning opportunity. It may open a door to extra support from their teacher.
• Apply logical consequences when needed. Logical consequences should come soon after the negative behavior and need to be provided in a way that maintains a healthy relationship. Rather than punishment, a consequence is about supporting the learning process . First, get your own feelings in check. Not only is this good modeling, when your feelings are in check you are able to provide logical consequences that fit the behavior. Second, invite your child/teen into a discussion about the expectations established in Step 2. Third, if you feel that your child/teen is not holding up their end of the bargain (unless it is a matter of them not knowing how), then apply a logical consequence as a teachable moment.

If you groan that it’s homework time, surely they will groan as well. Become aware of your own reactions to homework. Be sure that the tone and attitude you bring to homework is one of digging in, being curious, and learning.

A research study noted whether mothers’ comments during homework completion were controlling or supporting autonomy and competence. 4 The researchers concluded that those children/teens who brought worries about their ability to perform had a heightened sensitivity to their mothers’ comments. Moms who supported their autonomy – “I know you can do it!” – and demonstrated that they believed in their child’s/teen’s ability to do the work showed increased achievement over time. However, those mothers who were more controlling in their comments – “I need to check your work. That’s not right” – fostered less engagement and lower achievement in their children/teens.

Step 5. Recognize Effort and Quality to Foster Motivation

No matter how old your child/teen is, your praise and encouragement are their sweetest reward.

If your child/teen is working to grow their skills – even in small ways – it will be worth your while to recognize it. Your recognition can go a long way to promoting positive behaviors and helping your child/teen manage their feelings. Your recognition also promotes safe, secure, and nurturing relationships — a foundation for strong communication and a healthy relationship with you as they grow.

You can recognize your child’s/teen’s efforts with praise, high fives, and hugs. Praise is most effective when you name the specific behavior of which you want to see more. For example, “You took a brain break and came back and worked through that challenging problem — that was a great idea!”

Avoid bribes. A bribe is a promise for a behavior, while praise is special attention after the behavior. While bribes may work in the short term, praise grows lasting motivation for good behavior and effort. For example, instead of saying, “If you work on your homework right after school, I will let you choose the game we play after dinner” (which is a bribe), try recognizing the behavior after. “You worked hard to complete your homework. Love seeing that!”

• Recognize and call out when it is going well. It may seem obvious, but it’s easy not to notice when all is moving along smoothly. When your child/teen is buzzing through their homework tasks and on time, a short, specific call out is all that’s needed. “I notice you not only completed your homework but turned it in as well. Yes! Excellent.”
• Recognize small steps along the way. Don’t wait for the big accomplishments – like the entire homework routine to go smoothly – in order to recognize. Remember that your recognition can work as a tool to promote more positive behaviors. Find small ways your child/teen is making an effort and let them know you see them.
• Build celebrations into your routine. For example, “We’ll get our business taken care of first with our homework, and then we’ll take a bike ride.” Include high fives, fist bumps, and hugs as ways to appreciate one another.

Engaging in these five steps is an investment that builds your skills as an effective parent to use on many other issues and builds important skills that will last a lifetime for your child/teen. Throughout this tool, there are opportunities for children/teens to become more self-aware, to deepen their social awareness, to exercise their self-management skills, to work on their relationship skills, and to demonstrate and practice responsible decision making .

[ 1 ] Henderson, A.T., Mapp, K.L., Johnson, V.R., & Davies, D. (2007). Beyond the bake sale: The essential guide to family-school partnerships. NY: The New York Press.

[ 2 ] wood, c. (2017). yardsticks; child and adolescent development ages 4-14. turners falls, ma: center for responsive schools., [ 3 ] national sleep foundation. (2018). national sleep foundation recommends new sleep times. retrieved on 8-21-18 at https://sleepfoundation.org/press-release/national-sleep-foundation-recommends-new-sleep-times ., [ 4 ] fei-yin ng, f., kenney-benson, g.a., & pomerantz, e.m. (2004). children’s achievement moderates the effects of mothers’ use of control and autonomy support. child development. vol. 75, 3, 764-780., recommended citation: center for health and safety culture. (2020). homework. ages 11-14. retrieved from https://parentingmontana.org..

ParentingMontana.org was supported [in part] by CFDA 93.959 and 93.243 from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), and by the Preschool Development Grant Birth through Five Initiative (PDG B-5), Grant Number 90TP0026-01-00, from the Office of Child Care, Administration for Children and Families, U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, and by the Montana State General Fund. The views and opinions contained do not necessarily reflect those of SAMHSA, the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, or the Montana Department of Health and Human Services, and should not be construed as such.

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My 12-year-old needs constant supervision to do his homework. What do I do?

Q: How do I handle a 12-year-old boy who needs constant supervision to complete his homework? If I do not micromanage him, he gets distracted and doesn’t complete his assignments.

A: I can guarantee there are hundreds of parents who are reading this and empathize with your position. Your essential question to me is: “How do I handle a 12-year-old boy,” and I would switch the verb from “handle” to “support.” Why do I suggest this change? Because humans are allergic to being handled, especially 12-year-old boys. He may believe he needs you to be at his side to complete work, but I can guarantee that being handled gets in the way of his growth and maturity, in terms of learning and life in general.

Before this sounds like a pile-on, I have nothing but empathy for parents who have found themselves in this quandary. No parent I’ve met has decided one day, “I’m going to create an unsustainable homework situation and micromanage my son!” No, habits like this are death by a thousand cuts and what starts with a little worksheet here and there turns into hours of whining, power struggles and exasperation.

How you should support your son depends on why he is so distracted. At first glance, it looks like a classic attention-deficit issue, but we don’t know. Anxiety can look like distractedness. A learning disability or difference can look like distractedness. Trauma and grief can look like distractedness. Essentially, the brain bounces around as soon as it isn’t sure what to do, and what can feel like a willpower issue is simply coping.

I would first sit down with his teachers to get an accurate picture of who your son is in the school setting. You should definitely let the teachers know about the struggles at home and ask them what they see at school. Second, if possible, ask the teachers for a reprieve from most to all homework. Whatever the homework is meant to do (reinforce skills, finish work from that day’s lessons) is not happening at home. Good teachers will see that your son needs a break and will help you create that plan. Third, as soon as you can, bring your son into the meetings with his teachers. While he may be struggling, he is certainly old enough to have a voice, opinions and needs. This may take some time but should be a goal.

After talking with his teachers, I am hopeful that a path forward will become a bit clearer. Maybe everything is “fine” and you need to simply break this habit and let him get on with it (which you need to do either way). Maybe your son needs testing to assess his learning style, as well as emotional needs. Maybe he needs a tutor or outside person so you can take the “mother/son” intensity out of the equation. Maybe your son needs an executive functioning coach, someone who can teach him tools so he can control his own time and attention. Maybe he needs more activities, fewer activities, more screen time, less screen time, more food, less food, more sleep or less sleep.

There are many factors that could contribute to your son’s distractedness and it would be easy to feel overwhelmed, but you have the most important partner when it come to solving this issue: your son. Because you’ve been micromanaging for so long, it may be hard to trust that your son is capable of being an agent of change in his own life, but any decisions must include him. The very essence of parenting is to help him mature to his fullest potential, which would necessitate bringing him into all the plans.

This may not be fast or easy, but it’s better to be slow and steady, repair your relationship with your son and let him find joy in learning again than it is to get him to produce or “do homework.” Remember, the goals are support, maturity and learning more about your son’s abilities. Get your own support team together and start now! Good luck.

Helping with Math

Age 12-14 Math Worksheets

In this section, you can view all of our math worksheets and resources that are suitable for 12 to 14-year-olds..

We add dozens of new worksheets and materials for math teachers and homeschool parents every month. Below are the latest age 12-14 worksheets added to the site.

Understanding the properties of rotations, reflections, and translations of 2D figures 8th Grade Math Worksheets

Solving Linear Equations in One Variable Integral Coefficients and Rational Coefficients 8th Grade Math Worksheets

Interpreting linear functions in a form of y=mx+b and its graph 8th Grade Math Worksheets

Performing Operations using Scientific Notation 8th Grade Math Worksheets

Understanding Irrational Numbers 8th Grade Math Worksheets

3-Figure Bearings (International Seafarer Day Themed) Math Worksheets

Exponential Growth and Decay (Financial Risk Management Themed) Math Worksheets

Addition of Radical Expressions (Ages 12-14) Worksheets (St. Patrick’s Day themed)

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12-14 years of age math learning objectives & standards:.

• Mathematics lessons from age 12 to 14 focus on college level preparation. It is expected that in this pre-college age bracket, math discussions are more complex and more abstract. Learners have to deal with radical expressions that involve rational exponents unlike in the previous age brackets where radical expressions are concentrated only with integral exponents. They will also go deeper with rational and irrational numbers by exploring their properties. In addition, they are expected to learn the concepts of complex numbers : its definition, operations, and application of conjugates to solve complex number-related problems. Learners also apply the meaning of Fundamental Theorem of Algebra and polynomial identities to look for the solution of a particular quadratic expression/equation. 
• In this age cluster, topics pertaining to Algebra mainly concentrate on polynomials , functions, equations, and inequalities . Here, learners are using their previous knowledge of algebraic expressions to find the sum, difference, product, and quotient of two or more polynomials. Theorems just like Remainder Theorem, Factor Theorem , Rational Root Theorem, and Binomial Theorem are being given more emphasis to solve for the roots of polynomials. Learners explore different mathematical strategies to solve for the zeros of quadratic equations — these include factoring, completing the square, and quadratic formula. They also expand their knowledge and understanding of equations and inequalities by simultaneously solving linear and quadratic equations/inequalities. 
• In dealing with functions, learners are expected to learn how to evaluate and generate functions. In fact, the focal point of the discussions lie on the application of functions in real-life settings. The input-output relationship has to be defined using a functional model and to represent the values using graph and table. Exploration of different types of functions such as piecewise functions , absolute value functions, polynomial functions, rational functions, exponential functions, logarithmic functions, linear functions, and inverse functions are given more integral emphasis. 
• Learners will now welcome the world of trigonometry by learning its basic concepts. Initially, they will get involved with another unit of angle measurement aside from the degree which is the radian measure. As a starter pack, age 12-14 learners will learn about unit circle , special triangles, right triangles, the six trigonometric ratios, and the different laws — Laws of Sines and Cosines. They will also prove and derive trigonometric identities and will use some trigonometric concepts to provide proof of triangle similarities and congruences. 
• In Geometry, learners will concentrate not on triangles and quadrilaterals anymore but in circles. First, they need to orient themselves with the different definitions, corollaries, axioms, and theorems related to angles and segments of a circle. Also, arc length and area of the sector are given emphasis. On a more advanced level, learners will now begin their journey of conic sections — mainly about the equation of the circle and parabola . They will be asked to derive the center of the circle as well as the length of the radius given the standard form of the equation and vice versa. Moreover, they will strengthen their understanding of parallel and perpendicular lines , ratios of segments, and distance formula to prove some properties of a given geometric figure.
• Last but definitely not the least, learners of this age bracket will crystallize their understanding of basic statistical concepts by applying it in the field of Inferential Statistics. These learned basic concepts such as dot plots , histogram , frequency table, measures of central tendency, variability, population and sample are to be applied to research writing. Learners are expected to conduct surveys, mini-research studies, etc to make use of these concepts in conducting hypothesis testing and significant difference. Last, learners will make use of their knowledge of permutation and combination to solve real-life problems. The concepts of probability will be further applied in dealing with independent events, conditional probability, and compound events.

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Learning disorders: Know the signs, how to help

Learning disorders can make it hard for a child to read, write or do simple math. Know the symptoms and find out what you can do.

It can be hard to figure out that a child has a learning disorder. Some children have learning disorders for a long time before they are diagnosed. These children can have such a hard time in school that their self-esteem and drive to succeed goes down.

That's why it's a good idea for parents to know the symptoms of learning disorders. The sooner you spot the symptoms, the faster you can help your child succeed.

What is a learning disorder?

A learning disorder is present when the brain takes in and works with information in a way that is not typical. It keeps a person from learning a skill and using it well. People with learning disorders by and large have average or above-average intelligence. So, there's a gap between their expected skills, based on age and intelligence, and how they do in school.

Common learning disorders affect a child's ability to:

• Use or understand language.
• Learn other skills that don't involve words.

Reading is based on understanding speech. Learning disorders with reading often are based on a child's trouble understanding a spoken word as a mix of distinct sounds. This can make it hard to understand how a letter or letters represent a sound and how letters make a word.

Problems with short-term memory, also called working memory, can play a role.

Even when basic reading skills are mastered, children may have trouble with the following skills:

• Reading at a typical pace.
• Understanding what they read.
• Recalling correctly what they read.
• Making conclusions based on their reading.

One of the most common types of learning disorders is a reading disorder called dyslexia. It causes you to have trouble picking out different speech sounds in words and learning how letters relate to those sounds.

Writing requires complex skills that involve vision, movement and the ability to process information. A learning disorder in writing, also called dysgraphia, may cause the following:

• Slow handwriting that takes a lot of work.
• Trouble recalling how to form letters, copy shapes and draw lines.
• Handwriting that's hard to read.
• Trouble putting thoughts into writing.
• Written text that's poorly organized or hard to understand.
• Trouble with spelling, grammar and punctuation.

A learning disorder in math, also called dyscalculia, may cause problems with the following skills:

• Understanding how numbers work and relate to each other.
• Doing math problems.
• Learning basic math rules.
• Using math symbols.
• Understanding word problems.
• Organizing and recording information while solving a math problem.

Speech and Language

Children with speech and language disorders can have trouble using and understanding spoken or written words. They may have trouble:

• Reading and writing.
• Doing math word problems.
• Following directions.
• Answering questions.

A variety of speech and language disorders can affect kids. A few examples are:

• Stuttering — trouble saying words or sentences in a way that flows smoothly.
• Articulation errors — difficulty forming certain words or sounds.
• Childhood apraxia — trouble accurately moving the lips, jaw and tongue to speak.

Children with speech or language disorders often can understand and work well with visual information. They also can use visual cues well in social situations.

Nonverbal skills

Children with nonverbal learning disorders often have good basic language skills. They can excel at memorizing words too. But these children may have trouble with some skills that don't involve speaking, such as:

• Perceiving where objects are.
• Understanding abstract concepts.
• Reading people's emotions through facial expressions and other cues.
• Moving the body, also called physical coordination. This type of trouble is known as dyspraxia.
• Fine motor skills, such as writing. This issue may happen along with other learning disorders.
• Paying attention, planning and organizing, as seen in attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorders (ADHD).
• Understanding higher-level reading or writing tasks, often appearing in later grade school.

What causes learning disorders?

Things that might play roles in learning disorders include:

• Family history and genes. Having a blood relative, such as a parent, with a learning disorder raises the risk of a child having a disorder.
• Risks before birth and shortly after. Learning disorders have been linked with poor growth in the uterus and exposure to alcohol or drugs before being born. Learning disorders also have been tied to being born too early and having a very low weight at birth.
• Emotional trauma. This could involve a deeply stressful experience or emotional abuse. If either happens in early childhood, it may affect how the brain develops and raise the risk of learning disorders.
• Physical trauma. Head injuries or nervous system illnesses might play a role in the development of learning disorders.
• Poisonous substances. Exposure to high levels of toxins, such as lead, has been linked to a larger risk of learning disorders.

What are the symptoms of learning disorders?

At times, all children have trouble learning and using academic skills. But when the symptoms last for at least six months and don't get better with help from adults, a child might have a learning disorder.

The symptoms of a learning disorder in a child can include:

• Not being able to master skills in reading, spelling, writing or math at or near the expected age and grade levels.
• Trouble understanding and following instructions.
• Problems remembering what someone just said.
• Lacking coordination while walking, playing sports or doing things that use small muscles, such as holding a pencil.
• Easily losing homework, schoolbooks or other items.
• Trouble completing homework and assignments on time.
• Acting out or having defiant, angry or large emotional reactions at school. Or, acting any of these ways while doing academic tasks such as homework or reading.

Seeking help for learning disorders

Early treatment is key, because the problem can grow. A child who doesn't learn to add numbers in elementary school won't be able to do algebra in high school. Children who have learning disorders also can have:

• Anxiety about their grades.
• Depression.
• Low self-esteem.
• Less motivation.

Some children might act out to distract attention from their challenges at school.

If you suspect your child has trouble learning, you can ask the school to check for a learning disorder. Or you can get a private evaluation outside of the school system. A child's teacher, parents or guardian, and health care provider are some of the people who can request an evaluation. Your child will likely first have a general physical exam that checks for vision, hearing or other medical problems that can make learning harder. Often, a child will have a series of exams done by a team of professionals, including a:

• Psychologist.
• Special education teacher.
• Occupational therapist.
• Social worker or nurse.
• Speech and language specialist.

These professionals work together to decide whether a child's trouble meets the definition of a learning disorder. They also figure out what special-education services are needed if the child has a disorder. The team bases its decisions on:

• The results of tests.
• Teacher feedback.
• Input from the parents or guardians.
• A review of how the child does in school.

A child's health care provider also might do tests to look for mental health conditions such as anxiety, depression and ADHD . These mental health conditions can contribute to delays in academic skills.

For example, some children with ADHD struggle to finish classwork and homework. But ADHD might not necessarily cause them to have trouble learning academic skills. Instead, it may cause them to have a hard time performing those skills. Many children have ADHD along with a learning disorder.

Treatment options

If your child has a learning disorder, your child's provider or school might suggest:

• Extra help. A reading specialist, math tutor or other trained professional can teach your child ways to do schoolwork, study and get organized.
• Individualized education program (IEP). This written plan sets learning goals and describes the special-education services your child needs. Public schools develop IEPs for students whose challenges meet the school system's guidelines for a learning disorder. In some countries, IEPs are called individual education plans.
• Changes in the classroom. These are also known as accommodations. For instance, some students with learning disorders get more time to complete work or tests. They may be asked to do fewer math problems in assignments. And they may get seated near their teachers to boost attention. Some students are allowed to use gadgets. These could include calculators to help solve math problems and programs that turn text into speech you can hear. The school also might be willing to provide audiobooks to listen to while reading along with a physical copy.
• Therapy. Different types of therapy may help. Occupational therapy might improve writing problems. A speech-language therapist can help with language skills.
• Medicine. Your child's health care provider might suggest medicine to treat depression or anxiety. Medicines for ADHD may help a child's ability to focus in school.
• Complementary and alternative treatments. More research is needed to find out if these treatments work for learning disorders. They include diet changes, use of vitamins, eye exercises and a treatment that works with brain waves called neurofeedback.

Your child's treatment plan will likely change over time. You always can ask the school for more special-education services or classroom changes. If your child has an IEP , review it with the school at least every year. Your child may need less treatment or fewer learning aids over time. Early treatment can lessen the effects of a learning disorder.

In the meantime, help your child understand in simple terms the need for any other services and how they may help. Also, focus on your child's strengths. Encourage your child to pursue interests that boost confidence. Many kids with learning disorders go on to lead successful lives as adults.

Together, these tactics can boost your child's skills. They also use your child's strengths and help with learning in and outside of school.

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• Kliegman RM, et al. Neurodevelopmental and executive function and dysfunction. In: Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics. 21st ed. Elsevier; 2020. https://www.clinicalkey.com. Accessed Dec. 22, 2022.
• Von Hahn LE. Specific learning disabilities in children: Clinical features. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed Dec. 23, 2022.
• Kliegman RM, et al. Dyslexia. In: Nelson Textbook of Pediatrics. 21st ed. Elsevier; 2020. https://www.clinicalkey.com. Accessed Dec. 22, 2022.
• Neurodevelopmental disorders. In: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders DSM-5-TR. 5th ed. American Psychiatric Association; 2022. https://dsm.psychiatryonline.org. Accessed Dec. 23, 2022.
• Fisher P, et al. Systematic review: Nonverbal learning disability. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry. 2022; doi:10.1016/j.jaac.2021.04.003.
• Learning disorders. American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry. https://www.aacap.org/aacap/families_and_youth/facts_for_families/fff-guide/Children-With-Learning-Disorders-016.aspx. Accessed Dec. 23, 2022.
• Von Hahn LE. Specific learning disabilities in children: Evaluation. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed Dec. 23, 2022.
• Feldman HM, et al., eds. Learning disabilities. In: Developmental-Behavioral Pediatrics. 5th ed. Elsevier; 2023. https://www.clinicalkey.com. Accessed Dec. 23, 2022.
• Learning disabilities. Pediatric Patient Education. https://publications.aap.org/patiented. Accessed Dec. 23, 2022.
• Fu W, et al. A social-cultural analysis of the individual education plan practice in special education schools in China. 2020; doi:10.1080/20473869.2018.1482853.
• Patil AU, et al. Neurofeedback for the education of children with ADHD and specific learning disorders: A review. Brain Sciences. 2022; doi:10.3390/brainsci12091238.
• Language and speech disorders in children. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/developmentaldisabilities/language-disorders.html. Accessed Jan. 24, 2023.
• What are the treatments for learning disabilities? National Institutes of Health. https://www.nichd.nih.gov/health/topics/learning/conditioninfo/treatment. Accessed Jan. 24, 2023.
• Other concerns and conditions with ADHD. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/adhd/conditions.html#LearningDisorder. Accessed Jan. 24, 2023.
• Hoecker J (expert opinion). Mayo Clinic. Jan. 23, 2023.

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Supporting teenagers with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)

Teenagers with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) might need support to increase independence, develop friendships and learn.

Support works best when it makes the most of teenagers’ existing skills and ways of doing things.

Support plans for teenagers with ADHD

If your teenage child is diagnosed with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), their paediatrician , psychologist or occupational therapist or another health professional will develop a support plan for them.

The support plan should consider all aspects of your child’s life , including your child’s strengths, needs and responsibilities at home, at school and in other social settings.

Your child’s support plan might include:

• help to build independence
• help to develop friendships
• adjustments at school to support learning
• help to study at home
• medicines to help improve focus and attention.

If your child is also autistic or has a learning disorder , oppositional defiant disorder or anxiety , strategies to help with these can be included in your child’s support plan.

The support plan should also consider what works for your family.

It’s a good idea to discuss your child’s support plan with other members of your family and your child’s carers and teachers. This helps people understand your child’s strengths and areas where they might need more support.

Your child’s professionals will regularly review your child’s support plan as your child grows and develops.

Your child’s professionals will help you understand how to support your child and put the strategies in your child’s plan into action. They might also help you learn more about ADHD and neurodiversity .

Building independence for teenagers with ADHD

Independence for all teenagers is about trying new things, taking on more responsibility, making decisions by themselves, and working out who they are and what they want to be.

Achieving independence is an essential part of your child’s journey towards adulthood.

Here are strategies that can help your child with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) develop independence:

• Work with your child on goals for home, school, friendship and activities like sport. For example, your child might have goals like finishing homework before dinner or replying to messages from friends. Help your child think about how to get motivated and work towards their goals.
• Involve your child in making family rules . This can help your child feel heard and valued.
• Work with your child on consequences for breaking family rules. Apply these consequences consistently. For example, you and your child might agree that they lose access to the PlayStation for a day if they behave aggressively.
• Help your child build organisational skills. For example, work with them to develop daily routines for things like bedtime, chores and homework. This can make it easier for your child to complete these activities.
• Praise your child for attempts at independence – for example, when they remember to follow a family rule like hanging up their jacket. This can encourage your child to keep trying.

Developing friendships for teenagers with ADHD

Close friends and friendships are important for all teenagers, including teenagers with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). These friendships involve complex social and emotional skills, and most teenagers need some help to develop these skills. For teenagers with ADHD, friendship skills might need more practice.

Here are ideas to help your child build and navigate friendships:

• Encourage your child to try an extracurricular social group or activity like a team sport, gaming group, martial arts or drama class. This can be a way for your child to meet people with shared interests. Also, structured activities with routines and rules can help your child feel confident.
• Encourage your child to show interest in others. For example, they could set phone alerts to help them remember friends’ birthdays, or you could remind them to regularly contact a friend.
• Help your child to recognise strong emotions and calm down . For example, if your child feels criticised or rejected by a friend, your child could try going for a walk, listening to music or breathing slowly.
• Encourage your child to use problem-solving strategies if they have a challenging social situation like a misunderstanding with a friend. For example, your child might brainstorm solutions and decide to talk to their friend face to face about what happened.

Good parent-teen relationships help children have positive relationships with peers. So being warm and supportive, staying connected and actively listening to your child can help them with social relationships and friendships.

Adjusting the school environment to support learning for teenagers with ADHD

Teachers can make adjustments at school so your child with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) can learn in ways that work for them.

Here are adjustments that might work for your child and help them thrive at school:

• Offer choices for assignments – for example, a written essay, online quiz or hands-on project.
• Give your child extra time to finish tasks, especially tests, and allow breaks during tests.
• Divide learning tasks into smaller chunks.

You and your child’s health professionals can discuss these strategies with your child’s teachers, the year coordinator or the school’s learning support officer. You could also ask about developing an individual learning plan for your child.

Helping with homework and study for teenagers with ADHD

You can use strategies at home to help your child with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) get organised, manage energy levels and maintain focus when they’re completing homework, learning or studying at home.

Here are strategies that might work for your child :

• Make a weekly or monthly planner that shows when assignments are due and what tasks need to be done.
• Build rest breaks into homework or study activities.
• Break up learning tasks like reading or homework with short physical activity sessions.

A healthy lifestyle is an important part of development and wellbeing for all teenagers. It’s good for your child to get at least 8-10 hours of sleep each night, make healthy food choices and balance screen time with other activities.

ADHD medicines

Your child’s doctor might prescribe medicines to help your child with focus and attention.

Stimulant medicines Doctors will sometimes prescribe stimulant medicines for teenagers diagnosed with ADHD. These medicines can help teenagers with attention and self-regulation.

Methylphenidate is the most commonly used medicine of this type. It’s sold under the brand names Ritalin 10, Ritalin LA and Concerta.

Other stimulant medicines are dexamphetamine or lisdexamfetamine. Lisdexamfetamine is sold under the brand name Vyvanse.

Your child’s paediatrician or psychiatrist will work out with you which drug and dose will be best for your child.

Here are a few questions you might want to ask your doctor:

• How long will each dose last?
• What are the side effects of the medicine?
• Does my child need to take the medicine every day, including weekends and holidays?
• How long does my child need to keep taking the medicine?
• Can my child stop taking it suddenly?

Stimulant medicines can cause some side effects . These might include:

• loss of appetite, which can affect your child’s weight gain
• reduced final adult height – this might be reduced by 1-2 cm after long-term use
• anxiety or agitation
• worse tics , if your child has tics to start with.

If your child has been prescribed a stimulant medicine, your doctor should be monitoring your child closely. If there are side effects that are causing problems, your doctor might change the type, dose or timing of the medicine to help with this.

Occasionally teenagers with ADHD find that stimulants don’t suit them. For example, stimulants might make teenagers feel too quiet or just not themselves. If this happens, you should contact your child’s doctor so your child’s medicine can be reviewed.

Taking stimulant medicine doesn’t increase your child’s risk of developing alcohol and other drug abuse problems. In fact, it can protect them from this in the future.

Other medicines There are some non-stimulant medicines for ADHD. These include Strattera (atomoxetine), Catapres (clonidine) and Intuniv (guanfacine). These are sometimes used for teenagers who get side effects from using stimulants.

Some teenagers find that they don’t need medicine as they get older, but most do use medicine in the long term.

Teenagers taking responsibility for ADHD medicine

As children get older, they often want to take more responsibility for their medicine and become more independent. Some children also go through a period where they don’t like the idea of taking medicines.

Either way, if your child can share their feelings about taking medicine, you’ll be better able to understand where they’re coming from. Listening to your child will also help you understand how the medicine affects their daily activities.

It’s also good to encourage your child to discuss things with their GP, paediatrician or psychiatrist. You might suggest they have part of their appointments alone with the doctor.

Supporting teenagers with ADHD can be a big job, but it's an important one. Looking after yourself physically, mentally and emotionally helps you give your child what they need to grow and thrive.

The best laptop for kids in 2024: our favorite kid-friendly picks

These are our best laptop for kids picks on the market right now

• How we test

The best laptop for kids needs to fulfill a few important criteria. It should be easy to use, with a solid battery life, good portability, and tough enough to stand up to a few hard knocks here and there. In addition, the best laptops need to offer decent performance when it comes to web browsing, homework, and media streaming. 

For a great overall performance, we recommend the Acer Chromebook Spin 311. As with many other best Chromebooks , this is a 2-in-1 model that can be used in laptop or tablet modes, making it versatile and adaptable to your child’s way of working. It’s compact, portable, and sturdy enough to withstand the rigors of the daily school or college commute. 

Elsewhere, the Lenovo IdeaPad Flex 3 Chromebook is an ideal laptop for kids, if you happen to be shopping with a smaller budget. It may not win any prizes in the style stakes, but it has a solid performance, a decent battery life, and a robust build quality. Plus, it also offers 2-in-1 functionality.     

Of course, the practical applications aren’t the only factors to consider with the best laptops for kids. As with the best student laptops , they represent more than just a work tool. For younger kids, they can be a means to stay in contact with friends and family (under supervision, of course), a gaming device, or a way to enjoy their favorite TV shows and movies. 

We’ve sifted through the best laptop models that fit the needs of kids, and our list below has been carefully curated to cover every base, so you can make an informed choice from these reliable options.

The best laptops for kids: our top picks

The best laptops for kids in 2024.

Why you can trust TechRadar We spend hours testing every product or service we review, so you can be sure you’re buying the best. Find out more about how we test.

1. Acer Chromebook Spin 311

Our expert review:

Specifications

Reasons to buy, reasons to avoid.

The Acer Chromebook Spin 311 opts for an AMD APU, which utilizes the well-known Radeon graphics technology for better 3D capabilities - if you have time out of your studies to play some games from the Google Play Store! The dual-core AMD processor does offer Intel -Celeron-beating abilities, by a little at least, and so Chrome OS is going to remain more responsive.

More importantly, the Acer Spin 311 feels durable and well-made, meaning it can handle being dropped in a school backpack or thrown onto the back seat of your car. It’s highly portable and, although the screen disappoints a little by being a touch dull, perfectly usable. At just over eight hours the battery is good though not spectacular for a Chromebook, but balancing that against the great price makes this a strong choice. 

Read our full Acer Chromebook Spin 311 review  

2. Lenovo IdeaPad Flex 3 Chromebook

If you're on the hunt for something super-affordable, the Lenovo IdeaPad 3 Flex Chromebook is an excellent choice. You can pick this model up for a little over $200 in the US now, and it's similarly cheap in most other territories. Even at its original launch price of $339, we still gave it four stars.

No, it's not going to measure up to more expensive laptops when it comes to performance, but the sturdy chassis, long battery life, and touchscreen with a 360-degree hinge for swapping into tablet mode make this the perfect first laptop for a younger child. It should survive whatever your kid throws at it - and thanks to Chrome OS's parent mode, you can rest assured that your child's digital safety is secure.

Read the full Lenovo IdeaPad Flex 3 review

3. Google Pixelbook Go

Google might've sadly shuttered its own laptop division so we won't be getting a new model, but you can still pick up a Pixelbook Go for a reasonable price - and it's basically the best Chromebook ever made.

When we tested it, we marveled at the super-long battery life and excellent 'Hush' keyboard, with the entire construction of the laptop feeling sturdy yet sleek. It's got a sharp 1080p webcam - perfect for virtual classes or video calls with friends - and naturally runs Chrome OS smooth as butter; the perfect union of Google's hardware and software.

Bear in mind that it's at the premium end when it comes to Chromebook pricing, so if you're on a budget, you might be better served elsewhere. That's just about our only real criticism, though: you get a lot for your money here, and Google is committed to ensuring Chrome OS remains a stable, secure, and child-friendly virtual environment for years to come.

Read our full Google Pixelbook Go review

4. Acer Aspire 5 (2022)

Chromebooks can be super-cheap, but the downside of Chrome OS is that it lacks the versatility and widespread support of Windows. If you're looking for a more conventional laptop without a high price tag, the Acer Aspire 5 is the way to go.

The Intel Core i5 processor will smoke the majority of Chromebooks around the same price point, even if it's nothing particularly impressive for a Windows laptop. With the Aspire 5's aggressive pricing though, it's great value - and you're getting plenty more, too.

The battery life is solid, and the full HD display is good for both homework and watching videos after school. There's a 720p webcam for video calls and distance learning too, and the whole design is pleasingly robust without being incredibly heavy. There aren't quite as many ports as we'd like (only one USB-C is a shame) but at this price point, it's honestly hard to argue.

Read our full Acer Aspire 5 review

5. Acer Chromebook 516 GE

If your kid wants a machine for both schoolwork and gaming, you may want to consider a gaming Chromebook. The Acer Chromebook 516 GE is our current favorite of this rare breed of laptops, providing great performance in a sleek and sturdy chassis with a truly excellent screen. You'll pay a bit more than some of the cheapest laptops on this list, but the build quality justifies the price tag - this is a machine for a slightly older kid.

Bear in mind that these 'gaming Chromebooks' still use Chrome OS, so they can't directly run games from platforms such as Steam or the Epic Games Store. Instead, you can download and play games from the Google Play Store, and use cloud gaming services such as Xbox Game Pass and Nvidia GeForce Now. These require a subscription and a good internet connection, but grant you access to a wide library of games to stream on-demand - great for indecisive kids who are always looking to play something new!

Read our full Acer Chromebook 516 GE review

6. MacBook Air (M1, 2020)

Although it might've been replaced by the faster, sleeker M2 MacBook Air (2022) , the 2020 model - equipped with Apple's first-generation M1 chip - is still no slouch. A powerhouse productivity machine, the M1 MacBook Air is perfect for students no matter what level of education they're at.

Not only is it still capable of going toe-to-toe with many newer laptops in terms of performance, but the M1 model offers phenomenal battery life and the passive cooling design means that you'll never have to listen to noisy laptop fans. Back when we reviewed it, we praised the speedy performance, bright display, and comfortable keyboard - all things that hold true to this day. Oh, and it's quite a bit cheaper than the newer M2 model, too!

Read our full MacBook Air (M1, 2020) review

7. HP Pavilion 15

It's hardly the most exciting laptop around, but the HP Pavilion 15 is a reliable workhorse - and that's what makes it one of the best laptops for kids. It touts impressive specs (the kind you might expect from a pricier laptop) and an optional touchscreen display model, potentially a boon for kids who prefer a more tactile laptop experience.

HP Fast Charge is also a nifty inclusion, and a valuable one since in our review we did note that the battery life was a bit unimpressive. There wasn't much else to complain about though, and there's a variety of configurations available to suit your budget, though, so you won't have to spend the world to pick one of these up.

Read our full HP Pavilion 15 review

8. Asus TUF Dash F15 (2022)

If your kid is a die-hard gamer but also needs a laptop for work as well as play, the Asus TUF Dash F15 is a sound pick. Unlike many gaming laptops, the Dash F15 doesn't bring with it an ostentatious design covered in gaudy LED lighting; just solid performance, good battery life (for a gaming laptop, anyway - it's not going to beat a MacBook), and a robust, straightforward chassis.

We only found minor niggles with it in our review, noting that the bundled Asus software was a bit finicky and that some of the ports were awkwardly positioned. It's surprisingly lightweight as gaming laptops go, not the huge powerhouse clunkers we've become accustomed to. It's also relatively affordable for the performance you're getting - though if you're hunting for something extra-cheap, you could check out the 2021 Asus TUF Dash F15 too.

Read our full Asus TUF Dash F15 (2022) review

The best laptop for kids: FAQs

What is a good first laptop for kids.

There’s a wealth of choices when it comes to laptops for kids, with some great options from manufacturers like Dell, Lenovo, and Acer. And although there’s no definitive answer here, we were impressed by the Acer Chromebook Spin 311 .  

This 2-in-1 Chromebook is versatile, lightweight, portable, and has a reasonable battery life. It’s not too expensive and is powerful enough to comfortably cover any kind of junior homework assignment. Plus, if the worst comes to the worst and it gets unceremoniously dropped, it’s durable enough that it shouldn’t cause any lasting damage.    

What is a good laptop for an 8-year-old?

As with the above, a suitable laptop for an eight-year-old should cover the same bases, while offering reliable security measures to protect your child while they’re web browsing. 

Before buying, it’s worth checking whether your child needs access to certain software for their school work, as this will determine what type of laptop might be suitable (e.g. some software that runs on Windows won’t be supported by a laptop that runs on Chrome OS). 

Beyond this, it’s a good idea to stick to more household brands that you know can be trusted, and pick a laptop capable of providing what your child needs it to do. 

Should I get a Chromebook for my kid?

Chromebooks are great - they run on the super-lightweight operating system Chrome OS, which isn't as demanding on your hardware and can be set up in child safety mode to give you more control over your kid's browsing, perfect for younger users.

Chrome OS supports Android apps from the Google Play Store too, which means that if you get a Chromebook with a touchscreen it can be effectively used like a large phone or tablet.

However, it's important to note that Chromebooks aren't really for gaming (unless you get a game-streaming subscription) and Chrome OS doesn't support a lot of software that runs on Windows - of particular note here is that if your kid needs to use specific software for school, it's vital to check what operating systems it can run on.

How we test the best laptops for kids

Here at TechRadar, we believe in rigorously testing every piece of hardware that passes through our hands. If it fails to impress during testing, we'll always let you know; we won't recommend you buy any product that falls short of the performance median for its price range.

Our testing process varies from product to product, but we're always sure to run the most appropriate tests considering the target purpose of whatever we're reviewing. This means we're always sure to run plenty of gaming tests on a gaming laptop, or editing benchmarks for a desktop workstation PC. We also always examine the build quality of a product to see whether it aligns with the attached price tag.

If you want to know more about how we test and rate the computers in this guide, check out our explainer on how we test laptops and desktops to learn more.

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Christian is TechRadar’s UK-based Computing Editor. He came to us from Maximum PC magazine, where he fell in love with computer hardware and building PCs. He was a regular fixture amongst our freelance review team before making the jump to TechRadar, and can usually be found drooling over the latest high-end graphics card or gaming laptop before looking at his bank account balance and crying.

Christian is a keen campaigner for LGBTQ+ rights and the owner of a charming rescue dog named Lucy, having adopted her after he beat cancer in 2021. She keeps him fit and healthy through a combination of face-licking and long walks, and only occasionally barks at him to demand treats when he’s trying to work from home.

• Rob Webb Contributing Writer

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Home / Expert Articles / Child Behavior Problems / Lying

How To Deal With Lying in Children and Teens

By janet lehman, msw.

When you catch your child in a lie, it’s natural to feel betrayed, hurt, angry, and frustrated. But here’s the truth: lying is a normal child behavior problem. It needs to be addressed, but for most kids, it’s not a character flaw, and it’s not an issue of morality.

Instead, lying is the immature and ineffective way they choose to solve a problem. Rather than fix an underlying problem, your child lies about it.

If your child doesn’t complete his homework, he solves that problem by lying and telling you he did. If your child doesn’t get home before her curfew, she lies about why. Or about where she was or who she was with. Lying is used to avoid consequences rather than face them.

I believe that with kids, lying is used as a faulty problem–solving skill. And it’s our job as parents to teach our children how to solve those problems in more constructive ways. Sometimes that means addressing the lying directly, but other times it means addressing the underlying behavior that made the lie seem necessary.

In this article, I explain the various reasons why kids lie and how to handle specific lying situations.

Kids Lie To Avoid Trouble

Most often, kids lie to avoid trouble. Let’s say they’ve gotten themselves into a jam because they did something they shouldn’t have done. Maybe they broke a rule, or they didn’t do something they were supposed to do, like their chores. If they don’t have another way out, rather than suffer the consequences, they lie to avoid getting into trouble.

Again, in my opinion, the primary reason kids lie is that they don’t have another way of dealing with a problem or conflict. Sometimes it’s the only way they know how to solve a problem. It’s a survival skill, albeit a faulty one.

Kids Lie to Individuate From Their Parents

Sometimes kids use lying as a way to keep part of their lives separate from their parents. In psychology, we call this individuation , and it’s quite normal.

At times it may even seem that they make up needless lies about things that seem trivial. It can be baffling to parents.

And, of course, children lie when they think the house rules are too strict and they decide to disobey them.

Let’s say you have a 16–year–old who isn’t allowed to wear makeup, but all her friends are wearing it. So she wears it outside the house, then lies to you about it. Lying may become a way for her to have you believe she’s following your rules and still do typical teen activities.

Kids Lie To Establish Identity

Kids will use lying to establish an identity, even if that identity is false. This can be used to impress their peers, perhaps in response to peer pressure. Your child might lie to his peers about things he says he’s done (that he hasn’t) to make himself sound more impressive. This is not unusual, and we all know adults who still do this in one way or another.

Kids Lie To Get Attention

When your child is young, and the lies are inconsequential, this behavior may just be his way of getting a little attention. This is normal.

Younger children also make up stories during imaginative play. Understand that this is not lying but rather a way for them to engage their imaginations and start to make sense of the world around them.

So, when a small child says, “Mommy, I just saw Santa fly by the window,” I think it is very different from an older child who says, “I finished my homework,” when he hasn’t.

Kids Lie To Avoid Hurting Other’s Feelings

At some point, most people learn how to bend the truth in order not to hurt other people’s feelings. If someone asks you if you like their new shoes, and you don’t, you might still say, “Hey, those look great on you” instead of being completely honest.

But kids don’t have the same sophistication that adults do, so it’s often more comfortable for them to lie instead. This type of lying is a first step toward learning how to say something more carefully.

Indeed, we teach our kids to lie when we say, “Tell Grandma you like the present even if you don’t because it will hurt her feelings otherwise.”

We have a justifiable reason—we don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings who’s gone out of their way for us. Nevertheless, we are still teaching our kids how to bend the truth. And again, this is normal.

Lying in Children is Not Usually a Moral Issue

I don’t believe lying in children is a moral issue. Therefore, I think it’s imperative not to take it personally if your child lies.

Indeed, most kids don’t lie to hurt their parents. They lie because there’s something else going on. The important part for you as a parent is to address the behavior behind the lie. If you’re taking it personally, you’re probably angry and upset—and not dealing with the behavior that led to the lie.

Here’s an example. Let’s say your child didn’t do his homework, but he told you he did. When you find out that he’s lying and confront him, he confesses and explains that he was playing sports with friends after school, and that’s why he didn’t do his homework.

At this point, you have a choice to make as a parent. Either you can focus on the fact that your child lied to you, or you can focus on the fact that he did not complete his homework.

I strongly recommend that you focus on the underlying behavior—the homework not being completed. As your child improves the underlying behavior, the reason for lying will go away. He won’t need to lie.

In contrast, if you yell at your child about the lying, about being betrayed, or about being disrespected, then that’s all you’re going to be able to address. Your child will shut down. And you’re not going to be able to deal with the real issue of your child ensuring that his homework is completed.

The bottom line is that your anger and frustration about the lie is not going to help your child change the behavior (not doing his homework) that made the lie necessary for him.

So lying is not strictly a moral issue; it’s a problem–solving issue. Lying is a lack of skills issue and an avoiding consequences issue. Your child isn’t lying because he is immoral; he’s lying because he can’t figure out how to get his homework done on time.

Most kids know right from wrong—that’s why they’re lying in the first place. They don’t want to get in trouble for what they’ve done, and they’re using lying to solve their problems.

That means our kids need better problem-solving skills, and you can respond as a parent by helping them work on their ability to problem-solve, which can be accomplished with effective consequences that teach your child how to problem-solve.

Pick Your Battles: Focus on the Serious Lies

I believe it’s the parent’s job to determine which lies are serious and which are not. And the most serious lies pertain to unsafe, illegal, or risky behavior. Therefore, I recommend that you pick your battles and focus on the serious lies.

For example, you may hear your child say to another child, “Oh, I like that dress,” and then later on in the car, they tell you, “I didn’t like that dress.” You might decide to confront your child about this contradiction. But you might also let it go, especially if this happens only occasionally.

But if they’re lying about something risky or illegal or unsafe, you must address it. And if it’s about risky sexual behavior, drugs, or other harmful activities—you may need to seek some help from a professional.

So pick your battles. Focus on what’s important.

What to Do If You Catch Your Child in a Lie

If you catch your child in a serious lie, I recommend that you do not react immediately. Instead, send him to his room so you can calm down. Talk with your spouse or a trusted friend or family member and come up with a game plan. Allow yourself time to think about how to handle the situation.

Remember, when you respond without thinking, you’re not going to be effective. So give yourself a little time to plan this out.

When you do talk, don’t argue with your child about the lie. Just state what you saw, and what is obvious. You may not know the reason for the lie, but eventually, your child might fill you in on it. Again, simply state the behaviors that you saw.

The conversation might go something like this:

“I got a call from our neighbor. She saw you sneaking out of your window. And I noticed that you were falling asleep at the kitchen table this morning at breakfast. But you told us that you were home all night.”

And then say to your teen:

“There’s going to be a consequence for that. You’re not going to be able to stay over at your friend’s house next weekend. And we’re concerned about where you went.”

Leave the door open for him to tell you what happened.

Remember, state what you believe based on the facts you have. Do it without arguing; just say it matter–of–factly.

“We have this information, we believe it to be true, and these are the consequences.”

Keep it very simple and listen to what your child has to say, but be firm.

How to Address Chronic Lying: Stage a Lying Intervention

If your child lies chronically or lies about unsafe, risky, or unhealthy behavior, I think it makes sense to address the actual lying in addition to the underlying behavior. You can do this by staging a lying intervention .

A lying intervention is a planned and structured conversation about lying behavior. This conversation lets your child know what you’ve been seeing, and it gives you a chance to tell them that you are concerned.

Here are some things to keep in mind when staging an intervention.

Plan the Intervention in Advance

Think about how you’re going to intervene in advance. Plan it with your spouse or co-parent. If you’re single, ask another close adult family member to be there with you.

When this issue came up with our son, my husband James and I planned out what we were going to say, how we were going to react, and even where we were going to sit.

We decided we were going to be as neutral and unemotional as possible. We identified the problem behaviors we wanted to address. We also decided what would be the consequences for our son’s behavior.

We did all of this ahead of time.

Be Specific About the Lying Behavior

When you’re talking with your child, be specific about what you saw and what the problems are. State your intentions calmly and matter-of-factly:

“If the lying about homework continues, this will be the consequence.”

“It’s obvious you snuck out last night. There will be a consequence for that behavior.”

Remember, it has to be a consequence that you can and will follow through with.

Keep the Intervention’s Message Simple

Keep it very focused and simple for your child. Concentrate on the behavior. And then tell him that you want to hear what was happening that made him feel he needed to lie.

Understand that you are not looking for an excuse for the lie, but rather to identify the problem your child was having that they used lying to solve.

Be direct and specific. The intervention itself should be quick and to–the–point. Don’t lecture your child for a long time. Remember that lecturing is not going to be helpful. Kids just tune that out. They’ve heard it over and over. They stop listening, and nothing changes. Lecturing is ineffective.

Take Time to Listen to Your Child

Because lying is most likely the way your child is trying to problem-solve, make sure you indicate that you want to hear what’s going on with her. Allow your child to explain herself and be prepared just to listen.

She may not be ready to talk with you about it initially. Therefore, just be open to hearing what your child’s problem is. You want to create a safe environment for her to open up to you.

But if your child is not ready, don’t push her. Instead, simply reiterate that you are willing to listen whenever she wants to talk. Try to be patient.

Related content: How to Talk to Your Child About Lying

A Word about Magical Thinking

Be aware that kids and adolescents are prone to engage in what psychologists call magical thinking . Your child engages in magical thinking when he convinces himself that his lies are true. Understand that your child doesn’t want to believe he’s a liar. No one wants to be known as a liar.

So you’ll see kids who’ve gotten caught smoking at school say, “No, I wasn’t smoking”—even though the smoke is still in the air. That’s magical thinking.

And when you’re a kid, you think that if you keep repeating the same thing over and over again, it will magically be true.

Moreover, if your child gets away with a few lies, he will start thinking he should be able to get away with them the next time. The lies become more and more abundant—and absurd.

But it’s your job as a parent to say in a matter–of–fact way what you feel is the truth. Acknowledge the lie, but give the consequence for the behavior, not for the lie.

Realize that most kids are not going to lie forever. In all my years in working with adolescents, there were very, very few kids that I met who lied chronically for no reason. Usually, kids don’t lie arbitrarily; they have a reason for doing so, no matter how wrong that reason might be. Your child does know right from wrong, but sometimes he chooses to lie.

I understand that it’s hard not to take lying personally or to be disappointed when your child lies. But just remember, your child is trying to solve a problem ineffectively. Our job is to teach them appropriate and effective ways to solve problems and to coach them through these confusing years. Over time, they can learn to do that without lying.

Empowering Parents Podcast: Apple, Spotify

For more information on the concept of individuation in psychology and behavior, we recommend the following article:

GoodTherapy: Individuation

About Janet Lehman, MSW

Janet Lehman, MSW, has worked with troubled children and teens for over 30 years. A veteran social worker, she specializes in child behavior issues — ranging from anger management and oppositional defiance to more serious criminal behavior in teens. She is co-creator of The Total Transformation® Program , The Complete Guide To Consequences™ , Getting Through To Your Child™ , and Two Parents One Plan™ .

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Unsure Unsure about my situation. My 15 year old says my rules are over the top. The one he has the most issues with is no phone after 10pm and no computer after 11pm. I have a rule he can game but not conversating with his female friends after 10pm. More Tonight he was gaming until 1230 am and then he told me it was one of his guy friends. When I pushed him on it he continued to say it was his guy friend. I saw his tablet that was connected to same game on computer that he was talking to a girl. I was am upset that he lied about who he was talking to. But more so that he broke the rule of no computer after 11 and no talking to anyone. He added her on the computer so when the phone shut off he still continued on the computer. When I asked him why he lied he says because other kids don't have rules like mine. Everyone gets to talk until 1 or 2 am. That im overbearing. To me that's absolutely ridiculous. Am I living under a rock or something? Do parents really let their kids stay up all night on the phone or computer? How do I address this. I think my rules are pretty lenient this child would not sleep if I didn't have any rules. Any advice is appreciated. I grounded him from all electronics for a week. Am I being to harsh? He's an only child and I'm struggling at this stage.

Dawn J Esq My son is 13, 7th grade, ADHD inactive. last year was hard with virtual learning, now he's barely turning in anything. Its come to me monitoring daily what's been turned in to the best that I can do but he continues to lie to me about having turned More missing assignments in. he's had consequences, to no avail-he is my youngest child of 4. help.

Gale Can't talk to her. Won't engage in any conversation,uses what I am upset about against me and does it again and denies she's doing anything, it's all me.

I just found out that my 10 yo girl has been lying to her so called best friend in school about her own background such as;-

- her parents have divorced n rarely come home early (totally untrue and quite opposite. I am a homemaker and are always around for my girls and my husband usually returns home early from work)

- we live in a five-storey house and own a few cars (we live in an apartment and have only 2 cars)

- we have a gym in our house (we don't, her cousin has)

- She has also been chatting online with her friends on the sly while having her classes online.

I don't understand why she lied about such things and doing things on the sly when I always encourages her to speak only the truth and also seek my permission before she chats with her friends, which I hv never rejected her request before.

Please could you advise me what to do? Note that she doesn't know that I found out about her lies.

I can understand your distress. Lying is a challenging behavior for many parents to address. We have several articles that offer helpful tips for managing lying in children and teens. You can find those here:https://www.empoweringparents.com/article-categories/child-behavior-problems/lying/

We appreciate you reaching out and sharing your story. Be sure to check back and let us know how things are going, Take care.

AtMyWitsEnd I don't even know where to start. My 12yo has all this school year lied to me on an almost weekly basis about homework completion. She's always has issues with math and it's what she will lie about. It started when we had to go to a hybrid schedule 2 More weeks into the school year. She attends in person 2 days a week in person all other days are virtual. She has supervision throughout the day at her day camp, but they do not help with anything except chromebook/tech issues. Then she has another hour of just hanging out with her friends at the club before I'm off work. Our routine is when she gets picked up I ask about any work in each subject. Then we get home and either do what is left or I check for completion before she's allowed phone time. But repeatedly she's said it's all completed, and even with the daily checks and phone restriction she lies. She's admitted to knowing it was there and wanted to just do it later. Everytime it's been math assignments, it makes some sense because it's the subject she struggles with, but why continue to lie if she know she'll still have to sit down and do it like normal? I've emailed her teacher multiple times telling him when we've spent what I consider an extended period of time on a single assignment i.e. 30 minutes or more for 1 workbook page, I've repeatedly said depending on the assignment sometimes I can't help much and we google YouTube videos. I just get the same response of assignments and due dates are based on what an average student can complete. I don't know if I should say X amount of time on this then I don't care what the teacher says we are done for the night, finish it late and see if that improves the lying? We still haven't been able to get tutoring because she's not "failing". So do I just let her fail to get help? I just want her to be honest, not avoid it something that's hard. All that gets is negative consequences but I can't seem to get through to her. It's progressed to no phone, no radio at night, books taken away(very big reader I do feel guilty for that one). The amount of time without her privileges has progressed like we wrote down when this started. Now up to 3 weeks to earn all back. The only phone pass during those times is texting and calling her dad after school work is done. He's unfortunately not very supportive in any of this only "you should just get it done and stop lying to your mom". I don't know what else I can do.

Hi everyone, searching for some advice. My family is a blended family, and have been together as a family for nearly 4 years. My daughter has recently started, or my partner feels not so recently, telling constant white lies, either to get out of doing homework, or to get another snack, or just generally get her own way in a situation. Last night, after some decorating had taken place, dust accumulated on the hoover in the hallway. After my daughter had gone to bed, my partner noticed the word idiot wrote in the dust on the hoover. He was really upset, Although their relationship has been challenging over the years, recently I felt it had improved and they had become closer. Anyway, he took the writing left personally, and thought it was directed at him. I although not pleased that this type of word had been written, couldn’t understand why he thought it was directed at him.

When I confronted my daughter about it, she denied writing it, although was the only other person in the house with us that evening. I pointed out the facts, and said it’s really difficult to believe you when I keep catching you out in lies, but I just don’t understand it. They had got on fine that evening, my daughter didn’t seem to have any resentment against my partner for anything that she would tell me anyway. So I just don’t understand it. What do I do to prevent the lies continuing?

Many thanks

Empowering Parents Editor Hi, thanks for visiting our site. Here's an article that most parents find very helpful: How to Give Kids Consequences That Work

drowden Hi, Maranda. It’s not uncommon for kids to lie in an attempt to get out of trouble. Lying is a poor problem solving skill. When a child is faced with a problem he doesn’t know how to handle, like having to face the consequences of his actions, he may lie More because he doesn’t know what else to do. And, he may continue to lie until he develops a more effective problem solving skill, even though he knows the behavior only adds to his troubles. Janet Lehman does give some great tips for how to address lying in children and teens in the above article. Another article you may find helpful is Kids and Lying: Does Your Child Twist The Truth? We appreciate you writing in. Take care.

So.... I have two boys ages 9 and 4. We are having issues with my oldest with lying....all the time.... about everything and not just little fibs but blatant lies, things I have no idea why he would even think to lie about. When I say everything I mean I could catch him in the middle of doing something he's not suppose to be doing and he will fight to the death that he wasn't doing it, knowing full well he was caught and that I saw him. But the very idea of owning up to the truth appears to be a concept that is unknown to him.

He lies when he doesn't even have a reason to lie. This issue has been ongoing for quite sometime now. My husband and I have done everything you could think of to curb this behavior, from losing electronics, chores, groundings,spending more time with him, sitting down and calmly talking to him about the importance of telling the truth, being honest and taking responsibility for his actions and understanding there are consequences for our actions good and bad. I have told him so many times that the truth may get him in a little trouble but not nearly as much as lying will. I have read countless articles, adjusted my own behavior to try and help, I ask him why he feels the need to lie, he just says he doesn't know. But no matter how calmly I address the problem or how upset we get with him...the behavior doesn't change. It's like a second nature to him. Compulsive. Only at home though.

I have personally gone and spoke to our family doctor about it and was pretty much shrugged off as it being a phase. It is getting to the point where even his younger brother is beginning to lie all the time as well (though its easier to get him to admit when he has fibbed). He lies to the point that it is incredibly difficult to tell when he actually is telling the truth. He will swear up and down that he is being honest, crying saying I never believe him (which of course makes me feel unbelievably guilty) and then not 5 minutes later he's caught in a lie. I make sure to praise him and tell him how proud I am of him, and on a daily basis when he lies I explain to him that I know(because I do) that he is better then the lies he tells and is capable of so much better. I hug and kiss my kids every day. I tell them I love them and make sure to express that love openly. They know that no matter what they do..I will always love them, that nothing in this world will ever change that.

I'm struggling, no matter how consistent we are nothing seems to be helping. I've lost my patience and find myself losing my temper way more then I'm proud off, I question myself constantly on what I'm doing wrong. I'm at my wits end. I don't know what else to do. Please Help!

Rebecca Wolfenden, Parent Coach I hear you. Lying can be such a tough pattern to address for many families, so you are not alone in dealing with this. As outlined in the article above, it tends to be more effective to view lying as a faulty problem-solving skill, rather than as a More moral failing or character flaw. So, part of changing this pattern will be helping your son to build more appropriate skills. For example, you might ask him “What could you do differently instead of lying next time?” You might find some additional tips in “How Dare You Lie to Me!“ How to Deal with a Lying Teen . Please be sure to write back and let us know how things are going for you and your family. Take care.

Diane My 12 year old son has been lying to the school nurse and school and now I am going to court because off my son he has been saying that I don't have food in the cupboard and I do and I can prove it and he says he More don't eat at school or home but I have photos and videos to prove it

KWJ Thank you for these tips. After reading this, I calmed down, apologized to my child for getting angry, then calmly talked about why he felt the need to lie. He said he felt better after the conversation. Hopefully this will prevent him from lying so much, but if not, he More knows there are repercussions. Great post.

Asking permission to share this article at facebook page.

RebeccaW_ParentalSupport elalinga Thank you for your question.  You are welcome to share our articles, blogs and other materials on social media, as long as you attribute credit to the article and our site.  You can also follow our https://www.facebook.com/ParentingAdvice/ for additional material from Empowering Parents.  Thank you again for reaching out, More and please let us know if you have any additional questions.  Take care.

RebeccaW_ParentalSupport Tammy Neese Thank you for your question.  You are welcome to share our articles, blogs and other materials on social media, as long as you attribute credit to the article and our site.  You can also follow our https://www.facebook.com/ParentingAdvice/ for additional material from Empowering Parents.  Thank you again for reaching More out, and please let us know if you have any additional questions.  Take care.

Good Article I am personally a teen who has lied and i really wanted to get the point of view of my parents, i have had this lying problem for a couple years and am still working on it, i definitely reccomend parents to use these methods since my parents have done More so and it has been going better ever since.

Stepmom Paradise Thank you so much for this great article! It has helped me tremendously with some issues that we are having at this moment.

Denise Darcel Thank you so much. Reading this information has given me peace of mind. I had a great concern for my grandkids. I will take this information and use it. I believe it will be a blessing for them. Thank you ver much

Swati Great article.

Excellent! Thank you for this post. I was really upset when I caught my child lying. and as you say my first reaction was to take it personally and be upset that he lied. 

Your article helped me to calm down and now I will apply your advise.

Thanks again. Your article made a difference to me and my child

G mom This was helpful to get my mind centered and see the problem from my child's perspective. Thank you!

Responses to questions posted on EmpoweringParents.com are not intended to replace qualified medical or mental health assessments. We cannot diagnose disorders or offer recommendations on which treatment plan is best for your family. Please seek the support of local resources as needed. If you need immediate assistance, or if you and your family are in crisis, please contact a qualified mental health provider in your area, or contact your statewide crisis hotline.

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• 1. “How Dare You Lie to Me!“ How to Deal with a Lying Teen
• 2. Why Kids Tell Lies And What To Do About It
• 3. Sneaky Behavior: How To Manage Kids Who Lie and Steal
• 4. How to Talk to Your Child About Lying
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Home • Kid • Play And Activities

29 Super Fun Activities And Games For 12-Year-Olds

Some exciting activities can be great for nurturing the enthusiastic tween brains.

Dr. Maymunah Yusuf Kadiri, popularly referred to as ‘The Celebrity Shrink,’ is an award-winning neuro-psychiatrist and mental health advocate with over 15 years experience.She is the medical director and psychiatrist-in-chief at Pin... read full bio

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Adolescence begins at the age of twelve for some, and this period signals a significant change in a child’s behavior and overall personality. You’ll observe a distinct personality, specialized hobbies, and improved cognitive ability. Encouraging them to try different activities for 12-year-olds (tweens) can assist them in meeting their developmental needs . It is also important that you give attention to your child at this age. While it is good to take them camping and fishing, there are several other ways to engage them. This post covers some fascinating and fun activities for tweens to help them with their physical, mental, and socio-emotional development.

Activities for 12-year-old Children

Here are some enjoyable and entertaining activities that your 12-year-old child can indulge in with friends and family.

1. Make a comic book

Creative writing requires imagination. Involving your pre-teen in creative-writing activities can hone their cognitive abilities and promote out-of-the-box thinking. Choosing a theme, writing dialogues, and preparing visuals can encourage them to plan, organize, and present ideas. This productive, self-expressing activity can also boost their self-esteem and confidence . Alternatively, your child can try to draw a comic book containing only characters and no words — a fun and challenging way to fire their imagination.

2. Do a DIY project

DIY projects are based on the concept of “learning by doing,” a perfect way to indulge your tween in self-learning activities. The theme for a DIY project can vary, and it is best to decide on a task that is both engaging and challenging. Building a city using recyclables or preparing an effective plan to minimize plastic waste are some fun and learning DIY projects that can help boost your child’s critical thinking and logical reasoning skills .

3. Learn to code

Gamified coding and computer programming is a fun-filled and creative activity that can provide 12-year-olds an exciting learning experience. Coding can be useful in strengthening their problem-solving, communication, critical thinking, and collaboration skills. Besides, it can teach them perseverance. Coding could also progress to robotics.

4. Learn a new language

Learning a new language can help improve your tween’s cognitive and decision-making skills. Besides, it can hone your child’s communication skills that are relevant for personal development. Depending on their interest and preferences, they can learn one or more than one language. You could enroll them in a language class or download a language-learning app.

5. Play a board game

Playing board games , such as Brainstorm or Scrabble, is a joyful, engaging, and learning experience. But, how about preparing one from scratch? Making a board game requires creative skills. Gaming is a great way for your child to come up with a random idea to develop a new board game or work on an existing game by introducing/removing some elements of the game. In either case, your child would be able to experiment, which can help develop their cognitive skills. Moreover, it can boost brain function and build their self-esteem and self-confidence.

6. Solve puzzles

Solving puzzles , like a 1,000-piece puzzle or Rubik’s cube, is challenging, engaging, and entertaining. It can help enhance brain function, boost concentration, improve visuospatial reasoning, and develop problem-solving abilities . Besides, it reduces stress, enhances mood, and improves relationships by allowing effective collaboration. Board games and puzzles are great mental activities.

7. Play card games

Playing strategy card games , like sequence, can teach sportsmanship and patience and improve your 12-year-old’s logical reasoning skills. This way, it is similar to sports. Also, making strategies and playing with a positive spirit can improve their social and communication skills and help build positive relationships.

8. Take part in a STEM scavenger hunt

A STEM scavenger hunt is an age-appropriate indoor activity available in a worksheet format. In these activities, short-answer questions and answer keys are given. These questions are aimed at teaching the basic concepts of Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics to your child. There are some other forms of STEM scavenger hunts as well. Choose one for your tween based on the desired complexity.

9. Plan a Google Maps adventure

In this exciting activity that promotes outdoor exploration, you have to select and share the screenshots of exciting spots on Google Street View with your child. Next, ask them to guess where that street is and identify some places near that street. There are several apps, like GeoGuessr and Pursued, that you could download for this activity.

10. Outline a novel

If your 12-year-old reads novels, this delightful activity can boost their creative thinking abilities. Assign a theme to your child and instruct them to outline a novel. The outline should include the main characters, the novel’s setting, and the antagonist. They could work on a mystery, thriller, science fiction, or fantasy. Give a week to your child and let them experiment. Discuss the outline with them and guide them to do better. Remember, the child has to come up with an outline and not write a novel.

11. Create a photo collage

It is a joyful craft activity for 12-year-olds with a liking for photography. It involves clicking pictures of a favorite place, item, person, or anything that the child likes and presenting them in a collage. It can stir their imagination, and help them think analytically and express themselves.

12. Brainstorm an idea

Brainstorming an idea with family and peers can help improve your child’s critical thinking and logical reasoning skills and encourage them to be open to different perspectives. To initiate the activity, involve your child in some serious brainstorming sessions and encourage them to come up with ideas on minimizing the family’s monthly expense, plan a low-budget weekend get-together, and revamp the house without professional help. Discuss the ideas that your 12-year-old presents, and give them constructive feedback.

13. Solve an anagram

An anagram is a word or phrase formed by rearranging the letters of different words or phrases. For example, FRIED, when rearranged, makes words, like “FIRED.” It may seem simple, but an age-appropriate anagram provides relatively complex words and phrases to solve. Several board games and online activities can train your tween in solving an anagram. Anagramming can help children develop concentration, build vocabulary , and hone problem-solving skills.

14. Prepare a chain reaction

Preparing a chain reaction with dominoes is an entertaining activity involving a science experiment. You could get some self-explanatory domino-effect kits that are suitable for your tween to try the activity independently. Discuss every step in detail. Once acquainted with the concept of the domino effect, challenge the tween to prepare a similar chain reaction with other household materials like popsicle sticks, matchsticks, and paper cups.

15. Learn to play an instrument

Playing an instrument is a joyful activity that trains your brain and improves long-term memory. Also, it increases concentration, improves multitasking ability, and boosts creativity. More importantly, it relieves stress and makes a child feel happy by letting the emotions flow. Bongo, piano, and harmonica are some easy-to-learn instruments that you can suggest to your 12-year-old.

16. Practice woodworking

It is a creative activity in which your 12-year-old can learn to create something useful from waste wood lying in your backyard or lawn. Creating an item from wood involves using nails, hammer, screwdrivers, etc. It can help develop fine and gross motor skills and hand-eye coordination. You could ask your kid to build a bird feeder, a hutch for your pet, or a toolbox for your garage.

17. Organize a charity event

Guide your child in organizing a charity event, such as a fundraiser from scratch. Discuss with them the steps involved, like finalizing a charity theme, preparing promotion material, like pamphlets, and inviting people. Taking part in a charity event can help them develop a sense of responsibility, empathy, and compassion. Participating in such activities can also help improve their communication skills and cognitive abilities.

18. Make a tie-dye apparel

Resist-dyeing is a technique that can be used to create uncountable patterns through sheer creativity. The basic principle of the process is to tie the areas that you want to dye with a thread and color them. By tying the cloth, different patterns are produced.

Use a beginner’s tie and dye kit that comes with clear instructions on how to tie and dye with all the necessary materials. Involving your tween in this fun and exciting activity can help improve their creative thinking skills .

19. Prepare a healthy meal

You could introduce various fireless cooking recipes to your 12-year-old. Let them try as many recipes as they wish by guiding them on proper safety measures. Teach them to select healthy ingredients to enhance the nutritional value of the food. You could also teach them to cook dinner for the family or prepare pastry, ice cream, sandwiches, salads, smoothies, and shakes.

20. Run an obstacle course

This fun-filled outdoor activity can be a useful addition to your young teen’s exercise routine. Taking part in multi-step activities, like obstacle courses, can help improve their sequencing and problem-solving skills and boost strength and balance. You can buy obstacle course kits online or make one with your child, which can be another fun activity! You can include skating in the mix too. If you dont want to take them outdoors, you can make a obstacle course right in your living room with Lego blocks.

21. Play laser maze

Laser maze is a logic-based game suitable for a 12-year-old. The game involves the use of mirrors and beam-splitters to direct the laser through mind-boggling mazes to light up the target. Buy a laser maze game and get involved with your child to develop their reasoning and planning skills and provide a good learning experience.

22. Sing karaoke

Use a microphone and create a perfect atmosphere to motivate your child to participate in this fun activity with family and friends. Singing karaoke enhances cognitive abilities, like memory, concentration, and listening. Encourage them to dance while singing to promote physical activity, boost mood, relieve stress, and encourage self-expression.

23. Learn calligraphy or hand lettering

While calligraphy is the art of beautiful handwriting, hand lettering is the art of illustrating the letters by working around prefabricated and designed letters. Motivate your tween to learn one or both techniques to utilize their time and skills effectively. These inexpensive art forms can keep a tween engaged and entertained, boost mood, and relieve pressure and stress.

24. Watch a movie

Watch movies together or introduce your tween to different movie genres. You could also teach them about media and its impact on children and adolescents. It provides an opportunity to discuss their likes, dislikes, and preferences. Guide your tween to differentiate between reality and fantasy, and spend quality time building a positive relation. You can create a theater room to make each movie a memorable experience.

25. Research on pets

Rearing a pet is a learning experience for everyone. If you are planning to have one, then let your tween do the research. Guide them to know the best pets to rear , their suitable habitats, food habits, etc., and prepare a five-minute PowerPoint presentation to share their research with the family. This activity can help a child connect with the surroundings and develop communication skills.

27. Learn to draw and paint

Drawing and painting can be used as a form of art therapy activity to reduce stress and improve sleep. Introducing your pre-teen to this art can help utilize their imagination, develop existing talents and can help them develop mindfulness and tranquility, which in turn augments concentration and creativity.

28. Spikeball

Spikeball is a fun game that also serves as a great physical activity for your children as it involves walking, catching, throwing, and hitting the ball inside the net. Spikeball offers numerous benefits for kids, such as enhancing their teamwork and communication skills. The portability of the net allows for enjoyment anywhere, making it a convenient and enjoyable activity.

29. Duct tape crafts

Duct tape crafts offer a creative outlet for children. These colorful crafts appeal to children of all ages, making it an excellent activity for your children. Duct tape crafts come in various shapes, colors, and sizes, from wallets and bags to flowers and jewelry. You can unleash your child’s creativity by layering different tape colors or cutting unique shapes and patterns to craft custom designs.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. Is 12 years old still a kid?

A 12-year-old is in their tween years when they leave childhood and enter adolescence. They can be called pre-teens or tweens and are too old to be viewed as kids and not old enough to be considered teenagers.

2. What hobbies can a 12-year-old do?

If your 12-year-old is outdoorsy, they can pursue outdoor recreation activities like cycling or biking, kayaking, hiking, running, rock climbing, swimming, or skiing. If they love to spend time indoors, you can introduce them to gardening, drawing, crafting, reading, journaling, watching and reviewing movies, or painting.

3. How much screen time is appropriate for a 12-year-old during activities?

The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends a total daily screen time of two hours or less for children between 8 to 18 years old ( 4 ).

4. How can I encourage my 12-year-old to participate in new activities?

Expose them to diverse options such as sports, arts and crafts, music, dance, coding, cooking, or outdoor adventures. Take the time to listen to your child’s interests and preferences. Respect their choices and avoid pressuring them into activities they don’t find appealing. Lastly, reassure them that growth and learning come from stepping outside their comfort zone.

5. How can I balance structured activities with unstructured free time for my 12-year-old?

Create a daily or weekly routine with structured activities and unstructured free time. Recognize the value of unstructured free time for your child’s creativity, imagination, and independent thinking. Lastly, regularly reassess and adjust the balance between structured activities and unstructured free time based on your child’s evolving interests, needs, and overall well-being.

Choosing a bunch of fun and exciting activities for 12-year-olds can work well in developing their skills. They can enhance their cognitive abilities and improve their physical and mental development at a much faster pace. Encouraging them to participate in such activities will also allow them to figure out their personal preferences and utilize their skills to bring out the best in them. It eventually boosts their self-esteem and promotes social interaction, which is essential for kids on the verge of entering their teenage years.

Infographic: Activities That Are Fun And Facilitate Learning

Illustration: Momjunction Design Team

Key Pointers

• Boost self-esteem and confidence in your 12-year-olds by involving them in making comic books.
• Encourage self-learning and critical thinking by engaging them in DIY projects.
• Enhance their communication skills by enrolling them in a language class.
• Teach them patience and sportsmanship by involving them in card games.

Image: Dall·E/MomJunction Design Team

• Benefits of Playing Board Games ; Bucks County Free Library
• The Importance of Reading to Your Children ; Children’s Bureau
• Kids in the Kitchen: The Benefits of Cooking with Children ; The Growing Room
• Justin Parent et al; Youth Screen Time and Behavioral Health Problems: The Role of Sleep Duration and Disturbances ; National Library of Science (2017)
• Fact-checker

Dr. Maymunah Yusuf Kadiri MD

Nisha bharatan b.tech, harshita makvana b.com, pg dip, trisha chakraborty ma, bed, latest articles, how to draw cartoons for kids a step-by-step guide.

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