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My Experience Growing Up from Broken Family

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Words: 1295 |

Published: Jun 5, 2019

Words: 1295 | Pages: 3 | 7 min read

Works Cited

• Ahmadi, S., & Sadeghi, H. (2015). The relationship between family function and mental health in female students of high schools in Tehran. Iranian Journal of Psychiatric Nursing, 2(2), 1-6.
• Bernstein, D. P., & Fink, L. (1998). Childhood Trauma Questionnaire: A retrospective self-report manual. The Psychological Corporation.
• Brazelton, T. B. (1992). Touchpoints: Your child's emotional and behavioral development. Addison-Wesley Publishing Company.
• Chauhan, P., Gupta, R., & Parmar, R. (2018). A study on parent-child relationship and mental health of adolescents. International Journal of Indian Psychology, 6(3), 124-131.
• Gardner, T. W., & Ward, S. (2016). Life span developmental psychology: Introduction to research methods. Routledge.
• Goodman, R. (2001). Psychometric properties of the strengths and difficulties questionnaire. Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 40(11), 1337-1345.
• Hough, M. (2017). Marriage, divorce, remarriage. Open University Press.
• King, D. (2009). The impact of family breakdown on children's well-being: Evidence review. The Scottish Government.
• Lopez, F. G., Castro, N., & Rincón, P. (2013). Mexican-American men's and women's preferences for and attitudes toward counseling. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 60(2), 227-235.
• Santrock, J. W. (2017). Life-span development. McGraw-Hill Education.

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Having a Broken Family: What It Means and How to Cope

Brittany is a health and lifestyle writer and former staffer at TODAY on NBC and CBS News. She's also contributed to dozens of magazines.

Ivy Kwong, LMFT, is a psychotherapist specializing in relationships, love and intimacy, trauma and codependency, and AAPI mental health.  

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Even the most seemingly idyllic families face problems, and sometimes it can be hard to determine exactly how to go about navigating these issues. In the most extreme cases, certain problems can even lead to estrangement when relationships are severed for a prolonged period of time.

Often called broken families, there are many potential causes of estrangement between family members, and many of them come down to specific details surrounding the individuals and the situations involved. To find out more about what causes these relational rifts, as well as how to solve them, Verywell Mind tapped Frank Anderson, MD , a psychiatrist and psychotherapist, who specializes in the treatment of trauma.

"A broken family is one that includes unhealthy or severed relationships within the family unit," explains Anderson. "They are often associated with divorce but certainly can occur in an intact family where various members are in conflict with or estranged from each other." 

What Causes Estrangement Between Family Members?

While every relationship is unique, Anderson explained some common causes of estrangement among family members:

• Abuse: Anderson notes that this can include sexual, physical, or emotional abuse. While abuse is typically a result of some other factor (mental health problems, for example), it can cause relationship trauma and it's understandable if it complicates your ability to forgive.
• Mental health issues: If you or your family member faced mental health conditions or substance use issues that resulted in the estrangement, it's important to address those issues before moving forward with attempting to fix the relationship. If you were struggling with the issues, make sure you seek help from a therapist and then communicate to the family member that you have sought help and moved forward. If a family member was the one dealing with mental health issues, it's OK to ask them if they've addressed the issues by seeking out help.
• Financial abuse: Money can complicate any relationship, but this is especially true for loved ones. In a marriage, one person may be spending beyond the budget, or overly controlling with the money. Serious issues can arise when there is a death of a parent, and the children do not agree on how the assets are distributed among them. That said, many times these issues can be remedied by being open and honest about your concerns.
• Differing beliefs: This can come into play in a variety of ways—such as political or religious—and if it impacts your ability or your family member's ability to be kind and respectful, then it can become a major problem.
• Boundary crossings: This is perhaps especially true for immediate family members like parents or siblings. In these cases, it's especially important to make sure you've made the person aware of your boundaries so that they know exactly what it is that offends you. It's also important to listen to your family members if they are trying to explain their boundaries to you.
• Overly controlling parents or parental figures: While parents or parental figures often mean well , they can sometimes push too far when it comes to exerting their control. If this is carrying over into your personal life and impacting your relationships as an adult, it's important to make your parents aware of the ways they're affecting your life.
• Refusals to apologize: If you or a loved one are refusing to apologize , it's especially important to make sure you understand the other person's motives. If you feel that everyone's reasoning has been considered and there's still a refusal to apologize, this can cause a major rift.

How Do You Know When a Familial Relationship Is Worth Saving?

First off, it's important to be honest with yourself about the nature of the relationship you had with this family member before things went sour. Was it meaningful and positive or is the relationship's history lined with toxicity ? If you do find that it was meaningful and positive, it may be worth mending.

Broken families are repairable when the involved parties are willing to meet together, to listen to each other’s point of view, and to be able to freely discuss their differences with the intention of resolving the conflict and repairing the relationship.

How to Effectively Repair Relationships With Family Members

In order to effectively repair a relationship, Anderson emphasizes the importance of both parties' willingness to "forgo a defensive posture." By this, he means that each party should be willing to listen to the other, even if this means hearing things that are potentially hurtful. It also requires both parties to speak honestly and openly about their feelings.

"If at any time it becomes unsafe to anyone involved, each party should have the freedom to end the discussion, perhaps postpone it for another time or leave it without further follow-up if necessary," says Anderson.

If you want to speak with a family member, but you're worried that things will get too heated for either person, it may be helpful to enlist the help of a mediator.

"It is often helpful to have a third-party present to arbitrate the discussion," says Anderson. "The neutral party should be able to feel empowered to speak up when necessary and establish boundaries and guidelines for the ensuing discussion."

How to Accept That a Family Relationship Is Over

Sometimes, it is better to end the relationship completely. When a family member continues to be toxic, abusive, unapologetic, or unwilling to seek professional help, then you will not be able to successfully resolve conflict with this person and they will continue to hurt you.

It's important to note that you can forgive someone without reinstating a relationship with that person. In fact, it's better for your mental health if you forgive them because it can help you find peace.

"Forgiveness is something that is achieved internally," says Anderson. "It does not necessarily require the other person to be present in order for it to be meaningful, successful, and long-lasting."

Anderson emphasizes the importance of therapy when it comes to processing the end of any important relationship. While it may take some time, if you're open to mentally forgiving someone, you can move past it in a way that brings you internal peace.

"It is certainly possible, in the context of a supportive therapeutic setting, to work through, resolve, release, and forgive a family member who has hurt you, even if you don’t have contact with them," says Anderson.

A Word From Verywell

Relationships are complicated and even the most ideal family will have conflict at some point. Oftentimes, conflict can be resolved with effective communication, forgiveness, and sometimes the aid of professional help. Other times, the family unit is broken, conflict cannot be resolved, and you may find yourself estranged from certain family members.

It can be difficult to accept a relationship is broken, but maintaining healthy boundaries in your family relationships can prevent further pain.

Moving past hurtful things from the past is possible, and you will be better for it. Whether you need to forgive a family member for yourself or in order to mend a relationship, it's always best to make sure you do what's going to benefit your mental health.

By Brittany Loggins Brittany is a health and lifestyle writer and former staffer at TODAY on NBC and CBS News. She's also contributed to dozens of magazines.

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Cause and Effect of Broken Family: Exploring the Impact on Individuals and Society

Table of contents, causes of broken families, effects on individuals, consequences for society, addressing the impact, conclusion: fostering resilience and support.

• Amato, P. R. (2000). The consequences of divorce for adults and children. Journal of Marriage and Family, 62(4), 1269-1287.
• McLanahan, S., & Sandefur, G. (1994). Growing up with a single parent: What hurts, what helps. Harvard University Press.
• Heath, A. F., & Killewald, A. (2013). The importance of nonresident fathers for children's well-being. Annual Review of Sociology, 39, 149-170.
• Braver, S. L., Wolchik, S. A., Sandler, I. N., Sheets, V., Fogas, B., & Bay, R. C. (1993). A longitudinal study of noncustodial parents: Parents without children. Journal of Family Psychology, 7(1), 9-23.
• Wallerstein, J. S., & Kelly, J. B. (1980). Surviving the breakup: How children and parents cope with divorce. Basic Books.

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Essay on Broken Family

Students are often asked to write an essay on Broken Family in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Broken Family

What is a broken family.

A broken family is where the parents do not live together anymore. This can happen because of divorce, separation, or one parent passing away. Children from these families might live with one parent or move between both homes.

Feelings in a Broken Family

Kids from broken families often feel sad, angry, or confused. They might blame themselves for their parents not being together. It’s important for them to know it’s not their fault and to talk about their feelings.

Life Changes

After a family breaks, life changes a lot. Kids may change homes, schools, or lose contact with some relatives. It can be tough, but many adjust well with time and support.

Staying Strong

Even if a family is broken, love and care can keep it strong. Parents, relatives, and friends can help kids feel secure and happy. Remember, not living together doesn’t mean the love is gone.

250 Words Essay on Broken Family

Understanding a broken family.

A broken family refers to a family where the parents are separated or do not live together anymore. This can happen for many reasons like arguments, financial problems, or other personal issues. When parents split up, it can be a tough time for everyone, especially the children.

Effects on Children

Children from broken families might feel sad, angry, or confused. They might blame themselves for their parents’ separation. It is hard for them because they love both parents and might not understand why they can’t live together. Sometimes, they have to move to a new home or change schools, which can be scary and upsetting.

Life in a Broken Family

Living in a broken family can be different for every child. Some might live with one parent and visit the other, or they might live with both parents at different times. It is important that the parents talk to their children and explain what is happening in a way they can understand. This can help children feel a little better about the changes.

Finding Support

Friends, family, teachers, and counselors can provide support to children going through this tough time. Talking about feelings can help children cope with the changes. Support groups and activities with other kids who have similar experiences can also be helpful.

A broken family is a big change for children. It is filled with many emotions and adjustments. But with the right support and understanding, children can learn to handle these changes and still have a happy life. Parents play a big role in making sure their kids feel loved and secure no matter what the family situation is.

500 Words Essay on Broken Family

A broken family happens when the parents of a household decide not to live together anymore. This can be because they choose to get a divorce, which is a legal way to end a marriage, or just separate from each other. Sometimes, it can also mean that one parent has passed away. This is a tough situation for everyone in the family, especially the children.

When a family breaks apart, it can cause a lot of different feelings. Children might feel sad because they miss having both parents around. They might also feel angry or confused about why their family can’t be like it used to be. It’s normal to have all these feelings, and it’s important for kids to talk about them with someone they trust, like a family member, a teacher, or a friend.

Changes in Daily Life

Life changes a lot when a family breaks. Children might have to move to a new home, change schools, or adjust to a new routine. They might spend one week with one parent and the next week with the other. This can be hard because it feels like there is no steady routine, and it might be tough to keep up with friends and schoolwork.

Getting Support

It’s really important for children from broken families to get support. This can come from talking to a counselor, who is a person trained to help people with their feelings. Schools often have counselors that kids can talk to. Joining groups with other children who are going through the same thing can also help because it shows that they are not alone.

Looking at the Bright Side

Even though it’s a hard situation, there can be good things that come from a broken family. Sometimes, when parents are not fighting all the time, the home can be a calmer place. Children can also learn how to deal with tough situations and become stronger people because of it.

Staying Positive

It’s important for children to remember that even though their family has changed, they are still loved. Both parents can still be a big part of their lives, even if they don’t live together. Kids can still have fun, make friends, and do well in school. It’s not easy, but with time, things can get better.

A broken family is a hard thing to go through, but it doesn’t mean that life can’t be good again. There will be a lot of changes, and it’s okay to have many different feelings about it. Getting help and talking about what’s happening can make a big difference. Remembering that there is still love and good times ahead is important. Life keeps moving forward, and children from broken families can grow up to be happy and successful.

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• Jul 5, 2023

How Broken Families Contribute To Broken Societies – An In-Depth Analysis

Written by: asif choudhury , executive contributor, executive contributors at brainz magazine are handpicked and invited to contribute because of their knowledge and valuable insight within their area of expertise..

Societies are intricate webs of interconnected individuals, bound together by shared values, beliefs, and norms. The strength and stability of a society depend on the well-being of its members, and at the heart of this social fabric lies the institution of the family. Families provide the nurturing environment necessary for individuals to thrive, imparting essential values, emotional support, and guidance. However, when families break apart or fail to fulfil their essential functions, the consequences can be far-reaching, impacting not only the individuals involved but also the broader society.

What is a broken family?

A broken family refers to a household in which the traditional structure of a married couple living together with their children is disrupted. This disruption can manifest through divorce, separation, single parenting, or the absence of one or both parents due to various circumstances. When families fracture, the repercussions can extend beyond the immediate members involved, leading to societal challenges and a weakened social fabric.

In this article, we will delve into the multifaceted ways in which broken families contribute to the deterioration of societies. We will explore the impact on individuals, communities, and the overall social order, shedding light on the interconnectedness of family dynamics and societal well-being. By examining the consequences of broken families, we can gain a deeper understanding of the underlying factors contributing to societal breakdown, and, ultimately, strive towards building stronger, more resilient communities.

Throughout history, families have served as the foundational unit of society, imparting values, norms, and cultural traditions from one generation to the next. Within the family structure, children learn fundamental social skills, develop emotional intelligence, and acquire a sense of identity. When families break apart, children often bear the brunt of the emotional turmoil, experiencing a range of challenges that can have long-term effects on their well-being.

Children growing up in broken families frequently face emotional and psychological difficulties. The absence of one or both parents can give rise to feelings of abandonment, insecurity, and confusion. These challenges can manifest in various ways, including low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and behavioural problems. The instability and conflict associated with broken families can disrupt a child's emotional development, hindering their ability to form healthy relationships and navigate social interactions effectively.

Broken families and the economic consequences

Moreover, broken families often result in economic hardships for both individuals and society at large. Single-parent households, particularly those headed by women, frequently face financial struggles due to limited earning potential and increased responsibilities. This can lead to higher rates of poverty, inadequate access to education and healthcare, and a greater reliance on public assistance programs. The strain on social welfare systems and public resources intensifies, creating an economic burden that impacts the overall functioning of society.

Beyond the individual and economic consequences, broken families also contribute to social fragmentation and disintegration. Strong families serve as the bedrock of social cohesion, fostering a sense of belonging, trust, and mutual support within communities. When families disintegrate, social ties and support networks weaken, leading to increased isolation, alienation, and a diminished sense of collective responsibility. This fragmentation can create an environment ripe for crime, social unrest, and a breakdown in societal bonds.

Furthermore, the consequences of broken families often perpetuate across generations, creating a cycle of societal instability. Children growing up in broken families are more likely to replicate the same patterns in their adult lives, continuing the cycle of broken relationships and fragmented family structures. The absence of positive parental role models and the lack of healthy relationship dynamics can distort their understanding of family values and diminish the likelihood of stable, nurturing family structures in future generations. This intergenerational transmission exacerbates the issues faced by society and makes it increasingly challenging to break the cycle of broken families.

The impact on educational oppor

Additionally, broken families can hinder educational opportunities for children, further exacerbating societal challenges. The absence of a stable family environment can disrupt a child's academic performance, leading to lower educational attainment and decreased prospects for future success. The financial strain faced by single-parent households may limit access to quality education, perpetuating socioeconomic inequalities and hindering overall social and economic progress.

Recognizing the far-reaching consequences of broken families is crucial for addressing the underlying issues and working towards solutions. Effective interventions should encompass comprehensive policies, social support systems, and community initiatives that strengthen family relationships and provide the necessary support for families facing challenges. By addressing the root causes and investing in the well-being of families, societies can foster stability, resilience, and social cohesion, ultimately mitigating the impact of broken families and working towards the collective well-being of all members of society.

To gain a deeper understanding of the impact of broken families on societies and explore effective strategies for building stronger family structures, we invite you to download our free e-book, "My Marriage Rocks" Discover valuable insights, practical tips, and expert advice to empower individuals, strengthen relationships, and contribute to the well-being of society as a whole.

Visit h ere to access your free e-book today and join us in creating resilient communities built on the foundation of strong families. Together, we can make a positive difference in the lives of individuals and the fabric of our societies.

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Read more from Asif!

Asif Choudhury, Executive Contributor Brainz Magazine

From Lawyer to Relationship Saviour. How This Man Is Saving Marriages Around The World! For the last 15 years, Asif Choudhury has been a successful lawyer and mediator in the UK. His experience in this area has led to a special ambition – to save as many marriages as possible. Drawing on his experiences, he felt that couples often give up on their marriage too quickly, giving up at the first hurdle. This is why he decided to create 'My Marriage Rocks', an international movement designed to help couples navigate away from their marital problems and not only save their marriage, but make it thrive.

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I Grew Up In A Broken Home, But It Shaped Me And I’m Blessed For It

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People always ask me if it was hard coming from a broken family. By broken they’re referring to the fact that my parents divorced earlier than I can remember, both went through multiple relationships, and my siblings didn’t always have the same last name as me. From as early as I can remember, my parents didn’t get along, I was passed back and forth on a strict schedule as if the custody papers were actually a child rental agreement. I didn’t understand why my parents didn’t get along but even more confusing, I didn’t understand how they ever got along with each other. Honestly, it’s a miracle I was conceived. My friends would always ask if I wished they were still married but I couldn’t picture them together so that was always a quick and easy, no.

The hardest part about coming from a broken home isn’t that your parents aren’t in love anymore. The hardest part is that it’s not about you. When I say not about you, I mean nothing, nada. Even things you would think should be about you like your schedule, your school lunch money, your clothes, your extracurricular activities – they’re not about you, they’re all about the other parent. I felt like my parents spent more time trying to get back at one another, or jab each other, than actually tend to my needs. Being an only child only amplified the situation. I think with a few more biological siblings, they might have been too distracted but as an only child, my mom definitely had way too much time on her hands.

Whenever someone reacts to my childhood with sympathy I am always a little perplexed. If anything I feel fortunate to have come from a ‘broken home’. While people like to scoff at the fact that my dad has been married two times since my mom, I feel like I am the one who should be laughing because I’m rolling five deep when it comes to parental support after you count my mom’s beau who has been in my life since I was five. I might have been born an only child but I have been blessed with six siblings as a result of divorce (thank God, let’s face it I probably would have gone crazy by myself). I have one half brother and if my dad and his mom had never split I would not be here. What used to be a battle between attending 2 Christmas’s became a battle between 4 Christmas’s since I still visit my ex-step-mom’s house on the holidays. I can’t help but smile and feel loved. It’s hard not to feel the support of that many people.

I’ve gone through things I’d rather not relive. There were times that weren’t great and times that were downright awful, but whose family doesn’t have those times? I’d say the true meaning of family is having those rough edges that can make things uncomfortable with them but yet still make them your first choice above all else. Without my mom’s boyfriend, who would I go to when she has one of her moods? Heck, who would she go to when I have one of mine? Having a broken home teaches you that blood isn’t always thicker than water (sometimes it’s just as thick), forgiveness is possible, and although we were both grown adults, it was possible for my dad to find someone who would love me and my brother like we were her own.

Avolyn Fisher

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